Four

The night felt as though it had come faster this time. Garth had assured Dean he hadn't had to help clean up after the party. His family was planning a run under the full moon together. No hunting, no attacking people, just a test of their skills and bonding time. Gertie excitedly danced around the yard, motioning for Garth to pick her up and he did, snuggling his face into hers and giving her a type of butterfly kiss Dean had only seen in cheesy movies.

He wished he had seen it more often in real life.

"It's as though he was made to have children," Dean heard Bess comment from behind him. She came onto the front porch, cleaning off a dish with a towel.

"When I first met the guy, I never would have guessed this life for him," Dean replied, taking a sip of another beer. "I'm glad he's made the most of it."

"I thought he was gonna kill me the first time we met," Bess said, setting down the dish and towel and leaning up against a pillar near Dean's seat.

"He smelled like a hunter," Bess explained. "I know that sounds strange, but you guys have this edge about you. This adrenaline that most of us creatures, if we're smart enough, can smell on you. It's almost like it's in your blood."

"What do I smell like?" Dean asked.

"Old gun powder," Bess smiled. "Beer, because you're drinking it right now. There's another emotion in there that I can sense. I just can't really put a name on it yet."

Images of him and Castiel dancing at the request of the young werewolf girls flashed through Dean's mind and he drank another sip of his beer, trying to push them out. The last thing he needed Bess to pick up on was that.

Or Sam.

"Anyway, my pack had smelled him the moment he'd come into town. They told me to investigate, and so I did. Instead of finding somebody about to hunt us down, I found a quivering and crying man about to shoot himself in the mouth with a silver bullet."

Dean sat up a little straighter. He'd never first a firsthand account of Garth's attempt to leave the planet. He'd only briefly digested the details when they'd first encountered Bess and Garth had explained her place in his life.

"We sat and we talked," Bess continued. "I convinced him to join my pack. The next two months were as easy as swimming through calm water. He learned so much. I saw him come alive. I met the man he actually was over that short time and I learned to love that man more than I've ever loved anything or anybody else."

Dean paused a moment, continuing to watch over Garth and Gertie in the yard as the family members and friends who were going on the run slowly gathered and clapped Garth on the back. He watched as they all gathered their hands close to their chests and pulled off their silver bullet necklaces, placing them on the ground near a tree.

He watched them concentrate, muttering magical words he couldn't hear, and slowly the men before him and Gertie became wolves. Dean had never seen a full-blown transformation before, only just the bare minimum claws and teeth. They looked like actual wolves, on four legs, and Garth looked back to his wife, guiding Gertie with his snout, and they all took off running into the woods, letting out loud howls into the dark night.

"He learned that ancient magic about five months ago," Bess explained. "I didn't know we could do it either."

"You learn something new every day." Dean commented, lifting the last of his beer to his lips just as Bess turned to leave.

"Wait." Dean said, biting his lip thinking about what he was trying to articulate once Bess turned to face him again.

"How'd you know? That he was the one."

Dean could tell Bess was carefully thinking about it. She paused, smiled, and begun to speak.

"I wholeheartedly believe there's something deeper and cosmic at work when you find out that you know," she said. "You could listen to every love song on Earth, and they'll make you feel it, but it's also a song in itself that's never been written before. You'll fight, but rarely. You'll feel at ease when they're there. No discomfort, and if there ever is, you'll want to fix it immediately. You'll have bad days. They will too, but you can't let them outweigh the good. It's not a walk in the park, but it doesn't have to be impossible either."

"What if all of Heaven and Earth and whatever the hell else is out there tries to tell you it is?"

"Heaven is overrated," Bess smirked. "I can say that because I'll never go. As for that, well you just have to trust that it won't succeed."

Bess turned and left for the kitchen, murmuring to the twins in their playpen as she went.

Dean turned and stared out at the moon. He could picture it now, two younger werewolves on a hillside, looking into one another's eyes and knowing. If only it were that easy. Pride and God.

Those two factors still existed and damn if Dean was going to let at least one of them win.

"Dean."

Dean can swear he hears Castiel's voice, but he's too deep into his dream to wake up and make sure.

He walks towards a familiar front yard with a white picket fence. The grass is growing alarmingly green and there are no weeds. His stomach drops. He knows she probably doesn't live here anymore, but it's the last place that felt like home when he knew her.

Lisa sits on the front porch, reading a book. Ben is nowhere to be found.

"Dean?" she says, putting down the book and cocking her head as he approaches.

"Lis…" Dean manages to get out. He doesn't know what else to say.

"Something on your mind?"

She pats the stairs, motioning for Dean to sit down next to her.

Dean sits down, looking up at the setting sun in the sky. It never set from this angle in the waking world. It's a nice touch.

"You're still one of my greatest regrets," Dean mentions. A beer magically appears out of thin air. He's been drinking a lot of beer lately. Probably too much.

"Not meeting you, of course. Just…everything that happened after, but the real you doesn't know that. The real you will never know that. So, I guess I'll just settle for the you in my head. Also, I'm still convinced Ben is mine."

"Is that what you came here to say?" Lisa asks, taking a sip of her own beer that has also magically appeared.

"I actually don't know why I'm here." Dean replies.

"Liar," Lisa laughs. "You know exactly why you're here."

"Asking for advice has never been my strong suit," Dean says. "You know that."

"Not really," Lisa shakes her head. "The real me, when I did know you, barely knew the real you. I just knew that you had this badass secret job you couldn't tell me about, and even that I had to figure out by myself. Also, that last question is really out there."

"I'm so sorry." Dean chokes a little, nervously peeling the label on his beer with his thumb.

"That biker man that's supposedly his dad may or may not be real," Lisa chuckles. I'll say that much."

Dean smiles, but it falls almost seconds later.

"I don't remember it all, you had my memory erased," Lisa explains. "Only this version of me does."

"I still mean it," Dean answers, with a bit of an edge in his voice and he stops when he realizes it. "I wish I could go back in time and make things right."

"That's not what you want," Lisa shakes her head. "Not anymore. I'm inside your head, Dean. I know what you really want."

Lisa turns her head towards the entrance of her yard and suddenly two figures emerge from seemingly nowhere and Dean recognizes them immediately.

Ben laughs at something Castiel says and Castiel discusses something with him in a volume Dean can't hear. It's almost a knee jerk reaction, how Dean almost jumps from where he sits to go to them.

"What are you afraid of?" Lisa asks.

Dean stops a moment, mid step, and the hand holding his beer shakes ever so slightly.

"I don't know." He replies.

Dean awoke with a start, shooting up out of bed. Still covered in remnants of fever sweat from the last round of healing. Garth had told him this would happen, but he hadn't told him the dreams would get weirder and weirder.

He certainly hadn't planned on Castiel's hands wrapped around his wrists.

"You were thrashing in your sleep," Castiel explained, staring deeply into Dean's eyes. "You almost punched the side table. I didn't wish for you to hurt yourself."

Dean didn't say anything at first. He was too entranced by blue eyes and the dizziness of having abruptly woken up. Eventually, he managed to gently move his wrists away from Castiel and the angel backed up from the side of the bed.

"Cas," Dean sighed. "What did we say about watching me while I sleep?"

"It's creepy," Castiel replied. "Your words. Not mine."

"I thought we were long past this." Dean groaned and settled back down into bed, throwing an arm over his face.

"My apologies," Castiel bowed his head. "I just assumed you'd want some care due to your healing ailment. I'll leave you alone."

Dean wanted to call out. He wanted Castiel to stay. He honestly wouldn't have minded the angel crawling into bed with him at this point. If only it meant Castiel being there. As Lisa had said, being afraid was doing him no favors.

"Cas," Dean squeaked out and Castiel stopped in the doorway.

"You can stay for a little bit," Dean said. "If it would make you feel better."

"It's not me I'm worried about, Dean." Castiel replied.

Dean could tell those words meant the world to the angel.

Read and Review!

A/N: My mental health has been shitty for the past few weeks, but I suspect an upswing is coming soon. I had enough energy and such to write this. So, that has to count for something. I plan to update all my fics soon once our internet decides to stop crapping out.

See you next chapter!