A/N: My dear guests, I am Mr. Watkins, your host. Welcome ... to Chapter 9!
Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck. I am also not Ricardo Montalbán...in case you were wondering.
Chapter 9
Chuck has been working with Roan Montgomery three times a week for the past 5 weeks. The Satos have not only given him these sessions as a gift, but they were paying him his hourly wage to attend. They want to give him every incentive to better himself, so they tried to remove as many barriers as possible. These sessions have been going quite well. On top of teaching Chuck basic dances such as the Waltz, Cha Cha, Salsa and Rumba, they worked on posture, walking without tripping over his own feet and basic date etiquette. He was already a kind and polite young man, so he had a good foundation to start from on etiquette, but he learned which arm to offer a woman, pulling out and pushing in chairs for a date and the like. The dancing portion took the most time and effort. Chuck was not a natural dancer, but with Roan and his assistant's help he was making definite progress. He had mastered the Waltz, Cha Cha, and Salsa, but Chuck's white whale was the tango. He struggled with this dance. He knew the steps well enough, he just had a hard time letting loose and getting into the spirit of the dance for some reason. Roan opted to put it on the back burner since, at his age, it was unlikely to come into play. He chose instead to allow his assistant, Nadia, to instruct Chuck on some of the more popular dances. Nadia insisted that the "Carlton" was never, ever to be used...ever, so they taught him much more acceptable alternatives.
To say Chuck was a busy man was an understatement. On top of the sessions with Roan, Chuck was still working for the Satos between sessions and on weekends. He was also meeting with Sarah after school for a little bit most days to work on their duet. Throw in helping people around his apartment building, school work and helping around the apartment he was burning the candle at both ends. He really wanted to spend more time hanging out with Sarah, so he asked Mr. Sato for Saturday off so that he could surprise her. It was Friday and Chuck was sitting with Sarah and the other girls at lunch when he broached the subject.
"So, Sarah. Do uh...do you have any plans on Saturday?" Chuck asked a little apprehensively.
"Um, I don't think so. A run in the morning and that's probably about as far as I have planned. Why?" she asked a little curious.
"Well, I've been so busy with work and everything lately, I...I kinda missed hanging out. I thought maybe I could bring over some food and a movie and we could just...I dunno. Hang out?" Chuck shrugged looking a little sheepish.
"That sounds great actually. We haven't had a movie night in a while. Sounds fun." Sarah replied with a breathtaking smile.
"Oooo. Movie night, huh? Awww, you didn't think to invite me, Chuckles? I'm heartbroken," Carina chimed in with a faux pout.
"I know. What are we? Chopped liver or somethin'?" Jennifer added with her own mock puppy dog face. Sarah just shook her head and rolled her eyes at the two.
Chuck spoke up, "Well, I'm sure Sarah wouldn't mind. The more the merrier. I've been dying to show Sarah this documentary of the effects on biodiversity and gene mutation frequency in the wake of Chernobyl. It fascinating really. There are these fish..." Chuck continued until Carina and Jennifer both put up their hands in surrender.
"Ok. Ok. Uncle. I'd rather chew off my own leg. You are such a nerd, Chuckles," Carina shook her head at him and rolled her eyes.. Sarah and Chuck just looked at each other for a moment and both burst out laughing. "What? What the hell is so funny?" Carina asked indignantly.
"He was just messing with you Carina," Sarah managed to get out between bouts of laughter.
"Oh, HA HA. You're a riot. Asshole," as she playfully slapped him on the arm, a grin on her face. "I didn't want to hang out with you nerds anyway. I have an actual date, so pfft," as she blew a raspberry at Chuck.
"Oh, really. A date huh? Who's the next victim…I mean lucky guy! Yeah, lucky guy," Chuck with a mischievous grin across his face ducked the apple core that Carina threw at him.
"You're a dick, you know it. At least I have a date. What are you holding out for seminary or something?" Carina playfully stuck out her tongue and laughed at her own joke.
"Nice. That was a good one," Chuck confessed as he held up a hand for a high five which she happily returned. Chuck played it off even though there was a small pang over the comment. He'd never really been on a 'date'. The closest he'd been was hanging out with Sarah but they were just … friends. He shook the thought away and returned to the conversation. Lunch came to an end and they went their separate ways. The day dragged on and finally Chuck's favorite class came around. He walked with Sarah from Pre-Calc to choir chatting about the day's events. Mrs. Davis spent some time in choir on solos and their duet, pulling people into one of the private practice rooms attached to the choir room. Class ended and Chuck flagged down Sarah.
"Did you want to practice some more on the song?" Chuck inquired.
"Oh, No. I'm sorry I can't. I have to meet with Mark. We are going to grab some food and talk about prom stuff," she replied with an apologetic look.
"Oh...oh right. Yeah... Mark. Of...of course. I'm ...I'm sorry. I'm probably holding you up. Well….you uh...you guys have a good time," Chuck stammered out as he was hurriedly collected his things. That pang in his stomach was back in full force and he wanted to openly wince but kept his composure, or so he thought.
"Chuck? Chuck, is everything alright?" Sarah asked with a little concern on her face.
"Yeah. Yeah. Fine….I uh...I should probably be getting to work anyway. Um...yeah," Chuck knew he was not doing a very good job of keeping cool. He supposed he looked like he just ate a ghost pepper and was trying to play it off. "I'll...I'll see ya later, Sarah," he tried to make a hasty retreat but he stopped when she called out again.
"Chuuuck? Um, are...are we still on for tomorrow?" Sarah looked worried as she waited his response.
"Oh. Uh...y-yeah...yeah. If ...if you still want to. Um… 6:00 OK?" Chuck choked out.
"Uh, yeah. 6:00 is fine. I'll see ya then, Chuck," she waved with a little uncertainty. Chuck seemed kind of shaken up, but she wasn't sure what brought that on so quickly. Chuck made his escape around a few corners to a quiet hall and leaned his back against the wall and then bounced the back of his head off the wall a few times. Talking out loud to himself, "What is your issue Bartowski? Gaah. Chuck, pull your shit together. What is wrong with you? She's just going as friends with him, right. That's it. Sure he's handsome, athletic and smart and probably funny. He drives a nice car and his parents have money. He probably volunteers to walk puppies or visit nursing homes or something." Chuck banged the back of his head against the wall one last time, closed his eyes and blew out a long breath. "You are not his competition, Chuck. You are her friend. There would be no contest against all that anyway," trying to shake off the poisonous thoughts, he righted himself, took a deep breath and headed for the bus stop. He had a meeting with Roan.
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Chuck ambled into Roan's dance studio, lost in his thoughts. As he made his way to the dance floor, he nearly ran straight into Roan.
"Whoa. Charles, my boy. Off in Neverland I see," giving Chuck a questioning look.
"Oh. I'm sorry Mr. Montgomery. Just...lost in thought I guess," Chuck's jovial demeanor was markedly absent.
"Seems serious. Discuss." Roan motioned to Chuck with a determined stare.
"Just a bad afternoon, I suppose," Chuck shrugged.
"Let me guess. Said 'bad afternoon' had something to do with the lovely Miss Sarah? Am I getting warm?" inquiring with a raised brow, clearly not letting the subject go. The silence from Chuck spoke volumes. "I'll take that as a Yes, then. So what now? She kicked your puppy? Oooo Nooo. Doth I detect a hint of green, Charles? A challenger for the affections of our fair maiden?" a smirk growing across his face.
"Yeah, well. There is no challenge I can make there. Besides, I'm just her friend and if I were a good friend I'd just be happy for her and support her. I'm just being a selfish, whiny little bi- ...err .. guy." Chuck shook his head, chastising himself.
"True that friendship is important, but what makes you think that you cannot compete for her affections? You, Charles, are a suave, confident, and charming gentleman. I know. I made you," he winked with a grin. "And on top of that you are a handsome, intelligent and caring young man as well. Whatever it is you feel you lack, I assure you is only in your imagination."
"Look, I...I don't really have many friends. Her friendship means everything to me. I'm afraid that if I try to pursue anything else...if … when she rejects me...I….I couldn't handle losing her friendship…" he trailed off, a forlorn look across his face.
"Charles. Life is all about risk and reward. Sometimes the greater the risk, the sweeter the reward. But it seems to me that you don't think very much of this Sarah, if you believe that she would throw away your friendship if she could not share in your feelings. Do you really believe that your friendship to her means so little? If so, then perhaps you should re-evaluate your feelings. If you could be so easily tossed aside, then your friendship is doomed regardless. I think that you should talk with this Sarah of yours and find out where she stands; where you stand with her." Chuck just nodded in silence. "If I were a wagering man, I'd bet that the rewards will far outweigh the risks," he concluded with a grin. "Now come on, my whiny little 'guy'. We've got work to do," he chided with a grin. Roan pushed Chuck hard the rest of their session, providing a welcome reprieve from his thoughts. He then completed the remainder of his evening at Ward's with his head buried in broken electronics and appliances. It did him good to keep his mind busy.
Chuck was on the bus, making his way home from Ward's. He would often people watch on the bus. Either he would marvel at the human experiments gone awry or he would make up backstories for people in his head; who they were and where they were or going or where they had been. Tonight he noticed a young couple near the back of the bus. They were being affectionate toward each other, but not overly so. As he watched them, the now all too common ache in his stomach resurfaced. They seemed happy or dare he say ...in love. But what did he know of the subject aside from whatever TV or movies portrayed. Whatever it was between those two...whatever the name of the affliction, he wanted those symptoms. To seem so happy and utterly oblivious to the world around. He closed his eyes, leaned his head back against the headrest and blew out a long sigh. He remained that way for the remainder of the journey trying to occupy his mind. When he arrived home, Ellie was already there making supper.
"Hey El. I'm sorry I'm a little later than usual. Got held up a Ward's trying to finish up some work," he apologized as he put his bag in his room. "Can I help with supper?"
"Nope, I got it all under control. How was your day? Aside from obviously being long," Ellie inquired as she continued tending to her cooking.
"It was...alright, I guess," he replied unconvincingly.
"That doesn't sound very alright. Spill. What's going on?" she pressed and clearly there was no room for argument.
Chuck let out a sigh before starting, "It's just me being a guy, I guess. Sarah was going out to eat tonight with her … prom date, Mark. I have no reason to be jealous, but I can't help it. I know that we are just friends, but there is...just something in the pit of my stomach that just ...twists and turns when I think about it. I should be a better friend and just be happy for her. It..it just sucks I guess. There. Did I spill enough for you?" Chuck gave a self-deprecating smirk.
"Look, Chuck. That is not a 'guy' thing. That is a normal response for anyone when they see someone they really like with someone else. It is natural and yes, it does suck. But I thought she was just going with him as friends? What happened to that?" she asked.
"I dunno. I guess they still are. I didn't really ask. She just said they were going out to get some food and talk about their prom plans, etc.," Chuck shrugged.
"Well, see? That doesn't mean anything. There is a lot to plan for going to prom. If they are going to have matching colored accents and where they will eat dinner and what time. You need to make reservations way in advance during prom season. Then there is whose houses do they need to go to for pictures? What they will do after prom? There are tons of things to plan out. Think of it like a 'business dinner'," she said matter-of-factly. 'You know, unless the guy is really cute. Nah...I'm..sure it's...it's fine," she tried to sound reassuring.
"Thanks, El. That make me feel SO much better, now. Whatever would I do without you?" You could cut the sarcasm in the air with a knife. Ellie laughed and smacked him on the shoulder.
"You know I'm teasing you. I'm sure you have nothing to be concerned about. Besides, you're 'just friends' right? If you keep treating her as 'just a friend', that is all she will ever be. You know that just because people go from being friends to something….more….doesn't mean that the friendship stops. In any lasting relationship, friendship has to be the foundation. You don't leave it behind, you just build on top of it. Otherwise, when the relationship isn't 'new and exciting' anymore, you'll realize that there is nothing there to bind you together. What you need to do is figure out what you want from this relationship with her. Do you want to be 'just friends'? Or do you want to build it into something ….better?" Ellie just smiled and left it at that. "Come on. Time to eat." They ate together and continued with small talk about their respective days. The night grew late so they called it a day and went to bed. Chuck laid awake contemplating the events of the day and the words of wisdom that Roan and Ellie had bestowed him. He knew that he needed to have a serious talk with Sarah tomorrow at movie night. He turned on the radio to have something to listen to while going to sleep. It seemed that this station knew exactly what to play whenever he turned the damn thing on. He caught it just as the artist began to sing and laid there listening to the lyrics.
Games, changes and fears
When will they go from here
When will they stop
I believe that fate has brought us here
And we should be together babe
But we're not
I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you
And I'll keep my cool, but I'm fiendin'
I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
Goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
I may appear to be free
But I'm just a prisoner of your love
And I may seem alright and smile when you leave
But my smiles are just a front
Just a front, hey
I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you
And I'll try to keep my cool, but I'm fiendin'
I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
…
The words floating through his head, Chuck drifted off to sleep, hoping that tomorrow would end on a happier note.
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"So, how'd your date with Mark go," Carina asked with a clear teasing lilt to her voice.
"I keep telling you it wasn't a date. We ate food and talked about prom. That's it," Sarah let out an exasperated sigh.
"So, did he pay for the food?" Carina goaded.
"I paid for my own food, thank you. Like I said. Not a date!" Sarah was getting a little aggravated.
"Alright. Alright, Blondie. Don't get your panties all in a bunch. I hear you. So what did you guys decide on?" Carina asked with a chuckle.
"Well, he wasn't a lot of help. He didn't seem to care too much one way or the other about most things. I made him pick the restaurant and time so he can make the reservations. I told him I liked Italian, so naturally he chooses a Mexican place, but whatever. Fine. I told him my dress was red, so he could get a matching tie and cumberbund. He says 'I'm not really a fan of red'. Grrr. Whatever. I didn't even talk with him about doing anything after prom. I'll probably just go home or maybe third-wheel it with you," Sarah gave a small chuckle.
"You know you are welcome to hang with us. Just so you know, if there is a sock on the rear view mirror…" she said with a mock warning.
"Oh, God. Maybe I'd be better off at home," they both laughed.
"Seriously though, you can hang out with us. You can dance with me. I have to lead though. That's just how I roll, sorry." Sarah burst out laughing at Carina's antics.
"Thanks. I needed that. You know, I keep telling myself, that we are just going as friends and that it was really just a way for me to go to prom. Still, it would be nice to experience prom with someone who I really wanted to be with and who wanted to be with me. It is what it is I guess. There's always next year I suppose." Sarah signed with a little bit of sadness in her voice.
"You mean someone like, Oh….I dunno...like a certain nerd we know?" Sarah could hear the wry smile on her face it was so obvious.
"What? No….I mean… I dunno. He just seems to only think of me as a friend. Plus he made it pretty clear he had no interest in going to prom. So even if ... " she just trailed off. "It doesn't matter anyway. I've already told Mark I would go with him and I'm not going to back out. That would be a pretty shitty thing to do," there was sad resignation in her voice.
"Well, maybe it won't be too bad. Try to keep a positive attitude. Me and Jennifer and the girls will be there for you. Don't worry. We got your back." Carina declared.
"Thanks. Listen. I'm beat. I'm gonna get to bed. Thanks for the talk, Carina," trying to fight off a yawn.
"Alright, Girlie. I'll talk at ya later. Night." They ended the call and Sarah climbed under her covers. Sarah contemplated her conversation with Carina. Why had she brought up Chuck? Did Carina know something she didn't. Sure, she kind of wished that Chuck would have asked her when she brought up the topic of prom. Then she could have turned down Mark. Chuck clearly didn't have interest in going to prom. Maybe that was his way of letting her down easy. It didn't really matter since Chuck only seemed to be interested in her a friend. At least she still had that. She reached over and turned on the radio for something to listen to while she tried to fall asleep. She happened to just catch it at the beginning of the song.
"Brother. What is it with this station. Everytime I turn it on, its like they can read my mind or something," she mused as she closed her eyes and listened as she drifted off to sleep.
Games, changes and fears
When will they go from here
When will they stop
I believe that fate has brought us here
And we should be together babe
But we're not
I play it off, but I'm dreaming of you
And I'll keep my cool, but I'm fiendin'
I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
Goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
…
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Since Chuck had the day off from Ward's he slept in for once. For him, sleeping in meant 9:00 am. His conscience wouldn't let him sleep any longer than that. He got up, showered and ate some breakfast before making his rounds of the apartment building. There were people that had reached out to him that he knew needed computer help, so he stopped by their apartments first. Chuck usually worked on the barter system as he felt taking money from people for just trying to help out a neighbor seemed wrong to him. Though some would insist, most were happy with the bartering as they had fixed incomes. Chuck and Ellie were never wanting for banana bread or cookies. Once he was finished with the "scheduled" customers, he made the rounds to the "frequent flyers"; the ones that tended to always have problems or were maybe elderly widows or widowers that could just use a visit now and then. Mrs. Milano, Mrs. Osenbaugh, Mr. Leech and a few others were on his usual rotation of visits. They were great people and Chuck enjoyed their stories and it made him feel pretty good to be able to put a smile on someone's face just by spending a few minutes chatting.
After a long day of helping around the building and doing some laundry, Chuck got ready for movie night with Sarah. He was both excited and nervous. He called ahead before he left and ordered a pizza from Papa Geno's, which was near his stop where he would get off to head to Sarah's. He picked out a couple of movies and made his way to the bus stop. He spent the ride trying to go over in his mind what he would say to Sarah. How he would approach the subject. It didn't do much to curb his nerves but gave him something to occupy his mind. Once at his stop, he went to the nearby convenience store for movie snacks and then to Papa Geno's for the pizza. It was only a couple of blocks away, but he walked quickly so that it would not get too cold. The brisk walk did help to burn off some of his nervous energy so that by the time he reached Sarah's house he was a little more relaxed. He took a moment to collect himself and even his breathing before ringing the doorbell. Checking his watch it was 5:58, so he wasn't late at least. The familiar sound of a controlled fall down the stairs and loud thud at the end signified that Molly was inbound. The door flew open and Chuck was not disappointed as Molly was standing there looking him up and down. "I didn't order a pizza, but I'll take it," as the young girl reached for the box. Chuck merely had to lift it over his head to keep it away from the shorter girl.
"Nice try, small fry. I did however get you a consolation prize." Chuck reached into the bag of snacks he'd picked up and tossed a package of Gummie Worms to Molly.
"Alright. I accept your bribe. Sarah's in the basement, Sasquatch," Molly smirked as she moved to let him passed and close the door for him.
"Touche," he chuckled and headed toward the basement with his offerings. He reached the bottom of the stairs and there she was laying on the couch with her headphones on. She was singing along with the music and it was perhaps the most adorable thing he had ever seen. He instantly recognized the song and froze in place.
I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
Goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
He could only stand and stare as her siren song entranced him. He knew she had a beautiful voice from their hours of practicing together, but there was just something about the unguarded, unfiltered way she was singing now. As she continued to sing she opened her eyes and turned to see Chuck standing there with his trademark goofy smile. Her face nearly turned crimson and she franticly reached to turn off the music.
"Um, Hi. How uh...how long were you standing there?" she asked, clearly embarrassed.
Chuck only smirked and replied, "Not nearly long enough." That seemed to deepen the color of her cheeks which Chuck found even more adorable. To help her save face he changed the subject. "I come bearing gifts," he declared as he sat the pizza box on the coffee table and opened the lid to reveal the contents. "Veggie, no olives," he exclaimed with a wry smile.
A smile stretched across her face and her eyes sparkled, "You...you remembered?" a hint of disbelief in her voice.
"Of course I remembered. What sort of friend would I be if I didn't remember something as important as how you like your pizza?" he gave her a faux indignant look. She only widened her smile and shook her head. She ran upstairs and brought down some paper plates, napkins and a couple bottles of water. They ate for a little bit and then Chuck finally got the courage to break the silence.
"So, Sarah. Speaking of remembering things about you. I've been wondering for a while but never really knew how best to approach the topic." Sarah nodded in acknowledgement, prompting him to continue. "I noticed a distinct lack of any male figures in your family pictures around the house. And aside from knowing you moved from San Diego, I don't really know much about ...we… you. Look, I get if you don't want to talk about it. Believe me, I can relate. But just so you know, I'm here if you ever want to talk about it." Chuck confessed with a half smile.
Sarah chewed her pizza as if stalling for time. Eventually she swallowed and replied, "It's not stuff I normally like to talk about, but I'm not deliberately trying to keep it from you. Well, not anymore," she gave a wry smile. "Jack, my 'father', left shortly after Molly was born. He decided to move on to 'greener pastures' which took the form of his 22 year-old assistant. My Mom tried to take him to court for child support, but he would move or take a job that made it hard to garnish his wages. Eventually my Mom got sole custody of us and as part of the agreement, he waved all parental rights. He didn't try to fight it. He was just happy to be rid of that chapter of his life. So my Mom had to work two, sometimes three jobs to make ends meet. We had to move frequently as my Mom followed better jobs. We were in San Diego for about 6 years which is longest we were in one spot. She really did a good job at raising us. We always had a roof over our heads and food on the table. She made me participate in sports at the Rec Center near our house in San Diego. That's where I got interested in dancing, gymnastics and running. I really liked to run. Gave me time to clear my head and it was a sport that was all me and just me. I didn't have to rely on anyone else, didn't have to put my trust in others; others that would undoubtedly let me down. I got pretty good too. I ran cross-country in school, placed pretty well in the state. It's getting back into season so I am starting to train again. That's why I've been running in the mornings." she confessed.
"Ah that explains a lot. Your Mom sounds like a pretty remarkable woman. I can see where you get it." Chuck realized a little too late that the filter between the voice in his head and the outside world seemed to be broken at the moment. However, he was not about to walk it back. He believed what he said wholeheartedly, so he was going to let it stand.
The color in Sarah's cheeks grew again as a sheepish smile spread across her face. "Thanks. She is a remarkable woman. I've learned a lot from her. She's shown me how to be strong and independent. She gave me my love of music. We didn't have cable TV when I was growing up, so Mom would get out her old vinyls and we would listen to music and sing along to old 80's music. It's some of my favorite memories growing up." Sarah grew silent for a moment, lost in thought, but Chuck just let her take her moment. When she returned, she continued, "She is the reason I work so hard, push myself so much. She doesn't push me at all, it's all my own doing. She has worked so hard to give me the life that I have now, I want to be able to return the favor someday. I want to be able to take care of her one day, the way she has taken care of us. She deserves that and so much more," Sarah choked out as her eyes began to tear. Chuck stood up and moved to the couch beside her. He placed an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into a hug.
Chuck sat quietly for a few moments until he could hear the sniffling stop. "You know, I don't know much about parents or parenting obviously, but I always imagined that a parent's hope would be for their children to grow up to be happy and healthy. While providing for her financially would certainty be nice and rewarding in its own right. I bet what she really wants most of all is for you to be happy. So don't forget that OK? Don't work yourself so hard for this goal that you lose sight of what really matters to her." He pulled away from her and looked into her eyes. Her shimmering azure pools staring back at him took his breath away. She put on a tight smile and just shook her head in acknowledgement and then hugged him again.
"Thank you, Chuck," she managed to get out, just above a whisper. He just rubbed her back and squeezed her a little tighter.
"OK. Well, I sure know how to wreck a good time, huh?" Chuck said with a self-deprecating smile. "Hey. So I forgot to ask. How'd your...um…'thing' with Mark go?" Chuck really didn't want to talk about this, but if he was going to be a good friend, he would have to talk about things in her life.
"Um, it was alright I guess. We ate and talked about prom. Talked about where to eat and stuff like that," she stated matter-of-factly and shrugged.
"Well, only two weeks until the big day. I'm sure you'll have a great time. Mark's a good guy, right? I imagine he's trying to prepare a magical evening for you two," Chuck practically choked on his own words.
"I dunno. I'm not so sure about that. I don't know if we're on the same page on a lot of stuff. We'll see I guess," sounding a little deflated.
"Maybe just give the guy a chance. I mean, the amount of courage it must have taken to ask you to prom. I….I certainly know I wouldn't have that much courage," Chuck's voice softened and he looked at his shoes. "You're a … a really big fish, Sarah Walker. I can just imagine how….intimidating it would be to ask you to prom, downright frightening even." Chuck swallowed hard and kept his gaze to the floor.
"I...I realize that people look at me and they see an attractive, headstrong and opinionated girl. But under all of that I'm ...I'm just a girl, Chuck. I have my own fears and insecurities. It can be very lonely sometimes. People assume that guys call me all the time, so they don't bother trying. The problem is if they all think that….then nobody calls. I want what any girl would want. Someone to like me for me, the me that's on the inside. The one with the fears and doubts and scars from her past," taking in a jagged breath, she too looked to the floor.
"Well, if Mark isn't that guy for you, I really hope you find him. I'm certain he's out there. In fact, … I'm sure of it. So, enjoy your prom together and just have a good time. Even if it's not perfect, you'll be surrounded by friends and you'll make memories. I tell you what. I'll make you a deal. If your prom is terrible and you come home early or something, just text me and I'll come over in the morning and fix you all a Chuck Bartowski Breakfast Spectacular. How's that sound?" Chuck turned to her with a sheepish smile.
"Chuck….you have no idea how incredible that sounds. If I happen, by some stroke of luck, to have a good time, can I still call you for your spectacular breakfast?" she returned the smile, looking into his eyes.
"As you wish," he made a mock bow as he got up and headed for his bag. "I think it's time for a movie," he declared and he grabbed one and headed for the DVD player.
"Ok. What are we watching?" grabbing a pillow and hugging it.
Chuck responded with a wry smile of his own, "The Princess Bride."
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Over the next two weeks, Chuck and Sarah spent extra time working on their duet after school. They were making great progress and had nearly perfected it. They were now trying to add more nuance to the performance to make it really stand out. There even considering costumes or accessories to bring the piece alive. They were really having a great time working on the piece together and just hanging out. On a couple of occasions Chuck had gone over to Sarah's house for tutoring. Sarah seemed to have a really solid grasp of the material, so they just hung out and listening to old LPs instead, not that Chuck was complaining.
Sessions with Roan were coming to a close. The Satos had paid for 20 sessions and they had one session left. Roan had taken a liking to Chuck and as the Satos were long time customers, he comped some of the sessions as a friendly gesture. After the last movie night with Sarah, Chuck had a renewed enthusiasm, now working harder than ever. Since they were in LA, there was a very high likelihood of encountering Latin dancing in either a club, wedding or other social event, so they focused on perfecting some of these dances, saving the tango for last. It was now Thursday and their final session together. Roan went through a recap of all of the style and etiquette techniques Chuck had learned. He had Chuck and Nadia go through all of the dances he had learned since day one. The afternoon had been grueling but he had mastered them all to Roan's satisfaction. The last trial was the tango. Roan gave Chuck some last minute words of advice before the music began. Even though he was dancing with Nadia, a very attractive woman in her own right, it was not who he envisioned dancing with. He play through the dance in his mind with a different partner. He tried to imagine taking her out to a dance club or street fair and dancing with her, their bodies so close. It seemed to give him the inspiration that he needed and before he realized it, they had completed the dance and Roan was applauding.
"Charles, my boy, you have taken everything I have taught you and you have mastered it and made it your own. Until you are older, there is nothing more I can teach you here. Charles, you are an amazing young man and it has been my supreme privilege to have you under my tutelage. I expect great things from you Mr. Bartowski. I think I can speak for the Satos as well when I say we are very proud of you. Now, go forth and use these new skills wisely." With that Roan gave him a wink and a hearty handshake and Chuck was on his way.
Friday at school, everyone was abuzz in the hallways. You could feel the excitement in the air over prom; it was electric. Chuck however had a different feeling entirely. That knot in his stomach was nagging at him all day. He knew that he had wished Sarah to have a good time and he truly did want her to have a good night. Therein lies the problem. If she had a really good time with Mark, with the dinner, dancing and all the ...closeness. He was deeply worried that she would find that Mark was in fact "the guy" for her. Then all really could be lost. Mark would certainly not take kindly to his girlfriend hanging out with another guy and having movie nights and the like. This could very well be the end. Chuck may have been the architect of his own demise. There is an old adage about setting things free but it offered him little comfort right now. He had no alternative but to be happy and supportive of his friend, no matter how much it ate him alive inside. A bitter eulogy for the life that could have been would not win him the day. He would just have to have trust her; trust her to see in Chuck what he saw in her.
The lunch table was right out of the pages of the Geneva Convention. All of the girls at the table were talking about their dresses, getting their hair and nails done, where they were going to eat, and where they were going to party after the prom. Chuck could only focus on his tray and hope that as he ate, he could swallow down the lump in his throat as well. He hadn't realized that he had not spoken a word since he sat down or looked up from his tray. This was very uncharacteristic of him as of late and did not go unnoticed. Jennifer was sitting beside him and spoke up.
"You feeling alright Chuck? You've been really quiet. What's the matter?" she moved in close and inquired.
"Sorry. Just a lot on my mind I guess," replied Chuck with a weak smile.
She studied him for a moment, her brow furrowing slightly. "All this talk of prom….it's probably pretty hard to deal with if you don't have someone to go with. Or...maybe the someone you want to go with is going with someone else. Hypothetically speaking, of course."
Chuck was silent for a moment then began to nod his head, "Yeah….I suppose that would be pretty hard." He began berating himself internally. He was moping around and dragging everyone down with him. This was there time to be happy and damn him for ruining that. He forced a smile on his face and continued. "But hey. You girls are gonna have a great time. You'll have all you ladies there to dance with one and other when the guys wimp out and sit and talk sports ball or whatever. Great food, great music and great friends. What else do you need?" he finished with a sideways smile.
"Well, what about you? What are you going to be doing?" Jennifer asked. A little concerned.
"Well, there are a number of people around my apartment building that need computer help or just someone to talk and visit with. I'll probably do that for a while. Then maybe watch a movie or go to bed early. I dunno really." Chuck shrugged and finished eating his lunch.
"That's a really sweet thing to do for those people. You know what? I'm having a party at my place after prom. You should come. There will be a lot of people there and we will have music and more dancing and food and drinks. It should be fun," she offered.
"Don't you think I will be kind of a third wheel? Everyone there with their dates and then ... Chuck," giving her a questioning smile.
"It would mean a lot to me if you would come. At least think about it, please?" she practically pleaded.
With a small sigh he nodded, "OK. Ok. I'll think about it, " Chuck relented.
"Great! Here. Give me your phone." Chuck acquiesced with some hesitation. She sent a text to herself and then sent a text back to Chuck's number with an address and a time. "There. Now you have my address and number and that is when the party starts. It really would be great to see you there. Just think about it please?" Chuck just nodded and went back to finishing his lunch.
Sarah was watching the conversation between Chuck and Jennifer unfold. Jennifer leaned in very close to Chuck and they were talking too quietly for Sarah to hear over the din of the lunch area. Then she saw Jennifer take Chuck's phone and type something in and hand it back. She then picked up her phone and typed in some things and then waggled her phone at him and then pointed at his phone. Chuck checked the phone and nodded. It was fairly evident that Jennifer and he had at least exchanged numbers, but Jennifer typed entirely too much to be just a simple reply. Exchanging numbers wasn't a big deal, they were friends after all. If so then why did the exchange make her so ...so angry? Why would Jennifer need to text or call her Chuck? Whoa, whoa. Did I just ... ? OK. OK, get it together, Sarah. One issue at a time. Let's get through prom first.
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The day came to a much anticipated end as Chuck and Sarah were working on their duet in one of the choir practice rooms. Mrs. Davis had let them spend the last part of class working together before the weekend. They packed up the things in an awkward silence. They both wanted to say something to the other but didn't really know where to start. It was Chuck that finally broke the silence as they were walking out of the school.
"So, I imagine you're pretty excited for tomorrow. Getting your hair and nails done, all the pictures, fine dining, dancing and…and whatnot," Chuck babbled out.
"Uh, yeah. I...I suppose. How about you? Any big plans? A hot date or anything?" Sarah asked almost afraid of the response.
Chuck got a wry smile on his face, "Oh, yeah. I uh…I have a date all lined up for tomorrow. She's sweet and such a great cook. I'm going to head over to her place. I think she really likes me. Always touching my face and running her hands through my hair." Chuck was trying his hardest not to look at Sarah otherwise he wouldn't be able to contain himself.
"Really? Going….going to her place? Wow. That's uh…that's great. Good for you, Chuck." she swallowed the lump in her throat, trying to school her features.
"Yeah. Mrs. Milano. She's 83 and lives in my building. She's always pinching my cheeks and telling me I need to cut my hair. Mrs. Milano always has problems using her computer so I'm going to go help her out and visit for a while. Should be a good time," he confessed as the smile on his face turned more mischievous. Realizing what had just happened, Sarah instinctively smacked Chuck on the arm, "Owww!" he exclaimed.
"You ass. You think you're so funny don't you?" she chided him but her scowl slowly turned to a sheepish grin.
"I have my moments," he retorted with a smirk and a dance of his eyebrows. "Seriously, though. I hope you have a really great time tomorrow. You certainly deserve it. Don't forget, my offer still stands for Sunday. Just say the word," Chuck winked and smiled his toothy grin at her.
"Believe me, I haven't forgotten," with a wry smile and gleam in her eye, she waved her goodbyes.
A/N: If interested and listening along at home, the song on the radio and reprised in Sarah's basement is I Try by Macy Gray.
Reviews and PMs are always welcome. Thanks for reading. Stay tuned for Chapter 10.