Chapter 3

When the shock of hearing his voice wore off I moved closer to the porch and sat on the top step; probably to keep from fainting. "What are you doing under my porch?"

He gave a huff of impatience before he spoke. "Those men who ran through here, they're after me. I escaped from them earlier. I need to hide for a bit until the rest of my team gets here which should be sometime late today or tomorrow. I need to get where I can warm up. I haven't eaten in a few days and I need to check up on Tim McGee. He's in the hospital. He was shot a week ago. Let me in so I can get warm. I just can't climb out of here, they may be watching."

I could hear the frustration and exhaustion in his voice as I stood up to go into the house and I felt my impatience with him and the situation beginning to boil under my composed exterior and knew of no way to control it. "Okay, I'll help you but only for a few days and then you're gone." Even to my own ears I sounded cold and heartless. I entered my home, which at this moment seemed less like my sanctuary and more like a prison. I grabbed my flashlight and started down the cellar stairs into my empty dark basement. There is an old bureau which I use for crafting materials and my tool box sits on top of it, the furnace, the water heater and my oil tank. I haven't had the time to collect the things, i.e. junk, that most people have in their basements and I didn't really want to. The porch that he hid under had been added to the house after the initial building and two double-hung windows were still in place. Gibbs would have no trouble getting through them.

I opened the window, backed away from it and he slid feet first through it, landing right in front of me putting his hands on my shoulders to steady him as he teetered and all I wanted to do was run. Run from him, from me, I didn't know which and at that moment it wouldn't have mattered. I had nowhere to go.

He gave me that Gibb's smile that could melt your heart. "Hello Alex. It's been a while."

I nodded as I removed his hands from my shoulders with a small shrug. "Hello Jay and yes it has been a while." I didn't add that I'd wanted to keep it that way.

He got his look of curiousness. "You're still calling me that after all this time?"

I gave him a good hard look and gave a little laugh. "I may have to reconsider it. Jethro may be more appropriate now."

And there was the Gibbs chuckle that I'd always found endearing. "Really? Why?"

My eyes gave him another once over. "I believe that you've finally grown into your name." I watched his eyes open in surprise. "You've become… grizzled."

He gave another of his laughs. "Grizzled?"

I didn't bother to answer his question. I just left it hanging in mid-air like a balloon. I turned and walked to the cellar stairs. "Let's get you warmed up and fed. We'll figure the rest out as you eat." I heard my voice and in my head it sounded frigid and not me at all. He brings out the worst in me I guess.

He must have felt the chill in my voice because he stopped moving. "I can climb back out of here and take my chances but I really could use your help." He waited for me to react. "Will you do it?"

I turned around to face him and felt my frozen heart melt a little. "Yes, I will, but only for a couple of days and you will talk with Jeff Colton in the morning. He is having a forensic team to go through the yard. It's not a question Jay, it's a demand. I have to live here and Jeff is a man I respect and I want his respect as well." I spun on my heel and went up the steps to the kitchen to find him a hot meal. "You still drink coffee?"

I heard a chuckle come from behind me. "That depends on whether or not you still use that Columbian blend."

I must have rolled my eyes in amazement that he would remember my coffee. "Yes I do and I'll start a new pot for you." As I walked into the kitchen I felt a wash of relief at not being in the same room as him. I started the coffee, took out another packet of turkey and stuffing and a baggie of squash to give him a warm meal. It would have to do. I didn't quite know what my reaction to him really was but I've never been accused of being inhospitable and wouldn't start now.

He came into the kitchen and leaned on the door jamb watching me as the coffee stopped perking. "Are you hiding from me?"

I gave him a brief shrug and turned to face him. "Not when I came in here but now? I don't know, in reality I'm hiding from my feelings about the last time we spoke." I poured him a mug of coffee and handed it to him. I felt my back going up and I knew my control was waning. "Why are you here?" I could see the question shook him but maybe it was the force of the question and my hostile attitude.

He walked back to the table with his cup and sat down. I presume that he spent the next few minutes thinking about his answer.

His meal was ready so I plated it and took it to the table. Sitting across from him I could see that he still pondered his answer. "Why are you here and I don't mean Bishop, California? I mean my house and back in my world? When I left Washington I'd hoped we'd never see each other again. Damn it Jay, I moved nearly three thousand miles away from you to ensure that and yet," I let out a sigh, "and yet… here you are. I'm angry with you for making a liar of me. The man that just left is someone I respect deeply and he thinks I lied to him. So again I ask why are you here."

He took another sip of his coffee and gave me his 'Oh what the hell' look. "I'm here on a mission. McGee and I were here to stop federal theft and to investigate the deaths of two federal agents." His second sip of his coffee meant that there was more. "I knew you were here in Bishop but I didn't know where. Even if I did know it wouldn't have made any difference…I'd still be here."

I nodded my acceptance of his explanation. There was sadness to his voice and maybe a whole lot of tired.

As he finished his meal I went to prepare the guest room for him. Making the bed brought back memories of the many steamy nights between the two of us. It hurt like hell to remember those times. I heard him moving about downstairs and then him climbing the stairs. His footfalls seemed heavy with exhaustion. I finished putting the last pillowcase on and went to the hall linen closet where I took two towels out as he put his foot on the landing. I handed him the towels. "Leave your clothes in the hallway. I'll throw them in the wash and leave them at your door in the morning. There's a robe and flannel pants in the closet" I slid past him to go back down stairs.

I heard him move on the landing behind me. "You don't have to do this if you really don't want to…I can move on."

I don't know why hit me like it did but those words stuck in my craw. I stomped back up the stairs to face him. "No, you're right. I don't have to do this but you chose my house out of the hundreds of others in Bishop. You've put a bull's eye on it and me. Oh by the way, thank you for that! Just understand that no matter who hid under my porch they would have gotten treated just as you did. Good night Jay." I felt like a raving bitch storming back down those steps. I have to admit he always did bring out the best or the worst of all my emotions.

As I cleaned up his dinner plate and utensils I heard the shower run. I went up to pick up his clothes from the hallway. The scent of them brought back some poignant memories like the day we carried our kayaks to the dock in Shenandoah National Park. It was one hot day and we fried out on the water. His manly scent rose from his shirt and it nearly broke my resolve for keeping him at arm's length. I slammed his clothes and detergent with a vengeance into the washer, started it and went back to my reading.

I heard the shower stop running and a few minutes later I heard the door to the bathroom open but instead of his heading for the guest room he came downstairs. I looked up as he hit the bottom of the stairs.

He came and sat across from me. He wore a sheepish but concerned look as he started to speak. "I just heard from the rest of my team. They arrived early and I need to see them. May they come here?"

I knew how important his job and his people are to him. As angry as I was with him I really couldn't say no. "When do you want to do this?"

"We need to do it now. Would it be too much of a bother? They'd come in quietly, through the back door with no lights. Will that do?"

I nodded my agreement. "I'll make more coffee and finish what I'm doing. The laundry will take more time. Do you mind me being around while they're here?"

Gibbs shook his head no. "I'll grab the last cup before you make a new pot. I could use it to be more coherent and then you can make more. I'm sorry we're imposing and no, I don't mind if you're here and know what we're doing." He stopped talking and looked into my eyes. "Thank you Alex."

"Thank you Alex." Those were probably the most important words he'd spoken all night. I nodded and went back to the kitchen to pour him a new cup of coffee and start a new pot.

His people arrived about twenty minutes later. They couldn't have been too far away.

As they entered the back door he shook their hands or hugged them. I was seeing a new side of Gibbs. He used to keep them at arm length. I wondered what had changed. "I'd like to introduce you to Special Agent Eleanor Bishop and Special Agent Nicholas Torres. I want you both to meet an old friend of mine Alexandra Cross. She's graciously letting me stay here. Grab coffee and fill me in. Did you check on McGee?"

When both agents had their coffee and had sat at the kitchen counter Agent Bishop pulled out a note pad and opened it. "A new shipment has left Fallon and Agents Joseph and Smyth are tailing it from afar. Agent Davis' body has been located and is on its way to Palmer. It was badly decomposed but Jimmy says he should have no problems with it. Agent Ortiz was shot twice, one through and through in the upper arm and the other in the back. Palmer said it might be impossible to determine the time of death due to being submerged in all the ice but he did notice that he'd not eaten in a long while and that he'd been beaten pretty badly."

Torres had his notepad out and at the ready. "McGee's doctor at the hospital said McGee is doing better but still hasn't regained consciousness. That could happen anytime. Delilah is being kept apprised by phone every six hours. He should be fine. The doctor gave him a good prognosis."

Gibbs nodded. "That's good. I worried since I couldn't get to the hospital to keep him safe." In reality Gibbs felt a deep sense of guilt for taking McGee to the hospital and just dropping him there spouting orders as to his wounds and how he was to be protected. Then he ran back out the door to find the paramilitary group that had shot him. Neglect was something he didn't abide by especially in cases like this. "Glad he'll be okay and that Delilah is staying in DC. We don't know whose watching. Is McGee being fully protected?"

Torres turned to another page in his notebook. "Yes, the Sheriff's office has two teams protecting him around the clock. The Sheriff's Office knows were here and working a case. They'd like to have Agent Ortiz's murder solved and put to bed. How do you want to take them down?"

Jay's head turned in my direction. I saw the small smirk but that disappeared just as quickly as it appeared. "We're meeting Sheriff Colton here tomorrow morning. He was here earlier but I didn't get to talk with him. The para-group chased me through the woods to here and I hid under the porch. They kept going. I want them as they admitted to me that they killed Ortiz and Davis." He came to the door of the living room. "What time is the Sheriff coming in the morning?"

I could tell by the body language that both of his agents agreed with him about catching the bad guys. "Jeff said early. He's coming from Independence so I'd say nine. Forensics will be here earlier; maybe around eight."

Jay turned back to his agents. "Be here by eight."

Both agents rose, pushed their chairs in and prepared to leave. Agent Bishop put their mugs in the sink as Torres moved to the back door. "See you in the morning and thanks for the coffee. It is nice to meet you." Bishop smiled and looked to her boss. "I'll go over to the hospital and check on McGee in the morning."

Jay didn't say anything but I knew what he was feeling: guilt. He always felt that when he couldn't protect one of his own.

Bishop and Torres let themselves out the door and closed it quietly behind them.

The buzzer went off on the dryer and I went in to empty it. It is second nature for me to fold as I empty so I did it without thinking. I sensed Jay watching me. I put all the folded clothes in a laundry basket and went to take it upstairs.

Jay took the basket from me. "You know you didn't have to fold it. I would have done it. I'm a capable guy, remember? But thanks." He then headed up the stairs throwing a 'Good night Alex' over his shoulder back down to me.

"Good night Jay." The room suddenly felt empty and cold. I went from light switch to light switch shutting each one off and made sure the doors were locked and then I sat in the dark pondering why I felt the loss of him so acutely and why my feelings for him had woken up after all this time.