you'd break your heart to make it bigger,
so why not crack your skull
when the mind swells
— richard siken —
/
you are too young
to carry the weight of the world
on your shoulders & yet
everyone is so proud as they watch
you stumble & hit the floor
/
it's a game! let's score
and count out your losses
ready player one: your family
[you wake up a hundred
times later, all the same,
and the sunset looks like blood]
ready player two: the icicle
[you burn her hands and
throw him into the ocean,
but your memory is fickle]
ready player three: an apocalypse
[the earth is not home,
and you are peace, you are
the calmness of the stone]
ready player four: their ending
[every step you take is a betrayal
and you see these mighty pillars and think
you will never be forgiven]
/
how hard can it be when
your entire story is
essentially just
you and the past and
others who last but
it goes too fast
/
your lips move apart
because you want to do the right thing —
this is wrong, so strange, isn't it so
terrible that the universe is moving against
you at that very moment
(you look inside yourself and
your bones argue and
your blood starts to sing)
/
when the comet falls you
touch the stars
and fall back down
and ask to repent:
the sky is still bleeding &
the dust of your beginning
shouldn't taste
like
sacrifice
[but it scalds you]
/
this is also part of the story:
how the story changes
— richard siken —