Nomad, Shin's Story

by Dark Ryuu

Growing up, Shin (Toy) always wanted to do the right thing for everyone that he could, especially those in need. But can he keep from losing sight of himself, his family, and his friends, especially his elusive best friend, Lyla, and new partner in life, Komari? A prequel to Step Toward the Future and Legacy, an alternate universe crossover between all games.

21. Side Story: Second Chance

Side Story: Second Chance

Author's Note: I know for almost a fact I have this title somewhere else but it's poignant here. This is the final side story and will follow Jill mostly during the period of Shin's Prana period (Set before Chapter 14: Funeral) . Enjoy!

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June 12, 2002.

"…Well, I'd…hoped to give you both your presents when you brother arrived but I guess he's in flight or something."

Yagami Jill stood beside her twin brother, Tony, the latter standing there in the foyer of the house with his arms crossed and looking aggravated. "Yea, yea…"

Their father shot a look in the direction of Jill's big brother, Yagami Koji. Koji's brow was ticking but he remained quiet, his twin, Yagami Nelly, simply shaking his head. She couldn't blame Koji, really, he had really been getting into it with Tony because, frankly? Tony was an asshole. He woke up an asshole, he went about his day an asshole, and he went to sleep an asshole, only to start all over again the next day with the same disposition. There was some general admission in the house that he was the least liked family member right now.

"Did they ever fucking make Shin or Koji or Nerimaru work, huh?! This is bullshit!"

Jill rubbed her forehead, sighing to herself. That was his general gripe to her every single day and she was sick of advising that their parents had made the perfectly logical argument that Tony would not be getting money from them for doing nothing. She still had an allowance because she went to school as did Shaun. Their older brothers didn't have to work but most of them did while still getting allowance for going to school and helping with the house! It wasn't difficult: you were not going to be the special one that got paid for nothing.

She didn't understand what he was thinking. She…didn't have really an ounce of herself left to understand what he was thinking, she…she had other things on her plate. Following her dad outside, she looked up and gasped. Well…maybe she had room on her plate for this.

Side by side, there was a silver 2002 Mercedes E-Class and a red 2002 Chevrolet Camaro Z28 convertible. Papa! Yamada smiled, nodding, "Not quite the Camaros I grew up with but I think it's pretty spiffy for my princess."

"Thank you, daddy!" she squealed, hugging him tightly.

"Of course, my little lady" he rumbled, embracing her, "Happy 16th birthday."

"We better not catch you Speed Racering around in that thing" heckled Nelly.

Jill stuck out her tongue at him but Koji smiled, "I think it's a good option for her."

"Thank you, nii-san, at least you don't suck" Jill pouted.

Nelly made a face and finally looked to Tony. "Let me guess, Sunshine: it's not the right color."

Tony's hands were in his pocket, looking…not particularly stricken that he had a damn Mercedes provided to him for his birthday. Ugh, this was why no one liked him right now. Finally, he bowed, "…Thank you, dad. It's really nice, I wasn't expecting this."

'But you definitely could have just given me the money it cost to buy the car', was what he was thinking. Yamada smiled some, "Well, it wasn't as bad as I thought, especially since it's getting to be late in the year. You're welcome, son."

Tossing them the keys, their dad nodded, "I have to get back to work but you're okay celebrating your birthday Saturday, right?"

"That's fine, papa" Jill nodded.

"We'll still get cake and stuff for tonight" Koji assured, heading back toward the house, "Be careful, you two."

"Yes, please" Nelly drawled, "We already have two daredevil siblings out there."

Yagami Shaun, the youngest, usually took off early on his bike so he could pick up his best friend for school in the morning. He definitely was a mile a minute. Jill watched everyone enter back into the house, leaving only her and Tony. He looked peeved. "…Seriously."

"Seriously, they…purchased you a brand new car you didn't have to fund and you're preparing to come up with some complaint?" she said dryly.

Tony threw his hands up, huffing, "I can't work for this monthly payment, Jill—or if I did, it'd be all I made in a month! Look what they can throw around and they're making me go to work?!"

"Then don't work, baka! This is a gift. You don't know what deals papa could have made on this or if he bought it up front, but the fact of the matter is you can't expect them to just fund you goofing off. THIS is different!"

"Whatever" he grunted, "I have to work so I'll probably work through our fucking birthday."

Staring after him, Jill said: "…Happy Birthday, futago."

Tony paused at the top of the steps. She didn't expect him to say anything because he was just that person right now. She wasn't even meaning to wait for a response. Alas, he said lightly, not turning back, "…Happy Birthday, Jill. Have a good day. Really."

She smiled, nodding as she headed for her car, "You too."

He wasn't beyond saving though. He was just…really frustrated and self-centered. She knew deep down he was still her cantankerous but caring twin. He just…was going through some things right now.

…So was she.

Hesitant, she went to her new car and started it up. It hummed like a dream and she already loved it. That meant though…she was taking something she loved that her papa just bought her to a warzone. Pursing her lips, she nodded as she calculated that she could park at her friend's house which was a five minute walk from the school. Absurd, but…she supposed her brothers had been right.

I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare. I'm just a kid, I know that it's not fair. Nobody cares 'cause I'm alone
and the world is having more fun than me tonight.

Jill snickered, going up the road and rolling the window down, feeling the light early summer breeze in her hair. If Koji were here, he'd fuss and complain about this 'whiny teeny bopper bs'. Maybe he just didn't get it. Or…he did. Because, again, he'd been right.

"Oh my Gosh, Jill! Is that yours?"

Pulling into her friend, Diane's, yard as the young girl came out, Jill nodded, clapping her hands. "My dad's gift. I think it's super cute…and I want to keep it super cute so you think it's okay I park it here?"

"Of course, my parents don't even drive so this driveway is a total waste" scoffed Diane, "As long as you promise we go for a ride later!"

"Of course!"

They walked together toward the school, chattering, the rest of their group convening at the front. Jill indulged deeply in those ten minutes of calm and camaraderie. After this, she…had to enter the minefield.

When she walked into the door, she held her things close, trying to keep her eyes trained as a particular set of gazes pinned to her immediately. Every day for almost two years now? Like Koji had said…men could bekind of trash. Or at least this jerk.

Going to her locker, she took a breath to prepare herself. What was it today? As soon as she entered the combination and opened the door, she found a sheet of paper with big bold letters indicating 'SLUT' and 'WHORE'. Naturally. Balling them up absently, she checked her school shoes before pulling them on, carefully making sure her lock clicked into place. She left it loose a few times and had holes in her heel for a few weeks.

Parting ways with her friends, she filed into her classroom and sat down. The desk to her left and right were empty at the request of two girls. The teacher allowed it, seeming confused. Jill didn't care, it was just so…dumb.

There were whispers as she took her notebook out for class, the same old topic that had to have been disinteresting to someone by now. No, their school must have been that boring that they held onto her 'mistake' like water in the desert. Jill hated it here.

It was a party she went to with her friends. There was a boy. His name was Maro. Supposedly Maro was interested in her and had approached her at said party. Maro heard things about girls that looked like her…or had supposedly heard things, anyway. He insisted that she…

…She despised her brother's overprotective streak with a passion. It made her unequipped on dealing with the opposite sex because they were generally terrified of advancing with her due to the fact she had three crazy older brothers with reputations. She'd had two boyfriends but, well, they all panicked and dumped her. Yes, all three of those onii-sans of hers were out of proximity but…

It was that first year that Koji, Nelly, and Shin were gone that Maro came to her at that party and insisted. She despised her brother's overprotectiveness…but everything else they taught her, she…she would never admit it to them but she was very much glad they taught her. 'Consent is the name of the game' always rang in her head. She didn't have any interest in Maro and his command that she come blow him in the bathroom of the house party? No, she did not consent and it wouldn't happen.

So, naturally, because how dare the 'whore blonde' turn him down, he started the rumor that she had given it up to about three different guys that night, including him. The gossip spread like a dropping a match in gasoline and everyone from girls in other grades to guys coming into high school started to deem her the 'easy one'. She had literally touched maybe one penis and that guy took off in fright because he thought he heard Koji. She wouldn't even know how to do half the stuff they claimed she did.

God. Jill sighed to herself as she picked up her pen, preparing to take notes on math. She couldn't even…tell anyone. Koji probably would actually consider having Maro killed. That was her beloved nii-san's main problem: some people were joking or at least just making baseless threats. Koji though? Koji was fully capable of anything he said and sometimes, just sometimes, he meant it and went through with it. She'd never forget the guy that said he was going to sneak into their mansion and 'fuck her' to Koji to bait him. Koji promised the bastard he'd need to have his jaw relocated and find new teeth. Ten minutes later, said bastard was missing about ten teeth with a dislocated jaw. Nelly? Nelly wasn't much better but he was sometimes calmer. Just…he was definitely going to tell Koji which defeated the purpose.

Shin…her oldest brother had tried, picking up that she was miserable, but he…he had so much on his plate already. It seemed so petty and silly in comparison to his fighting in foreign lands. She might tell him when he got back but…that would just depend.

Shaun did go to school here so she figured he knew. Just, if he did, he made no inclination that he knew. That wasn't how Shaun operated though so she concluded that people kept their tongues around him specifically. Not that she'd put that on her baby brother anyway…

When Tony realized he'd much rather be doing anything else than come to school, he dropped out. That was before her predicament else she wasn't really sure what he'd do. He certainly wasn't like Koji, he never was really protective of her. She was sure he wouldn't like it but that was null and void, he'd…he didn't care anyway.

So, it was just her. She could tell her parents but once it reached that level, the backlash she'd face from their involvement would make what she was already going through worse. However much she wished she could drop out like Tony, she knew that…that wasn't the best path to take. Tony got worked to death too, having found a job in a grocery store. He worked close to 45 hours a week, by which point she wasn't sure how that was any better than school. He always complained about the 'shit pay' too, another reason he was pissed their parents would gift him something so expensive. She tried to explain that…that was going to be it? Like, if he didn't complete high school, that's pretty much the only jobs he'd get unless he got an apprenticeship. He'd just quietly walked away…

No, she…hated it here but she had endeavors that probably needed her to finish at least this degree. She wasn't going to college. After this nightmare, she couldn't envision just going to the next level of it. If she made it out of here, she'd count her blessings. Jill balled her fists when a girl walking past her whispered lowly 'cum slut', pursing her lips. No…

…It really couldn't get much worse than this.

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No. Life…life could most certainly get much worse.

Yagami Jill had gone out Saturday with her friends happily, oblivious. The weekends made up for everything that was going wrong during the week. She didn't have to think about people or their fabricated rumors or stupid pettiness. The problems stayed in school.

How naïve of her. Koji called her just as they were about to head to the mall around five. "Imoto, something's wrong. Mom said dad's in a panic, I…I think it might have something to do with Shin."

What? What…what about him? He was supposed to be home a few days ago. They just assumed…what had they assumed? He was late? Jill bit her lip, looking at Diane, Daisy, and Nannette, her friends that stayed solid and true to her through this nightmare, and whispered after Koji directed her to go home: "Something might be wrong with my brother that's overseas."

"Oh no, Jilly" Daisy rasped, her brown eyes widening, "Do you want us to go with you?"

"T…Thanks, Daze, but—but I'll be okay" she smiled shakily, "Let me drop you all off, I'm-I'm sorry."

"Don't be silly" Nannette scoffed, hugging her, "Call us if you need anything, okay? We'll check on you on AIM tonight."

"O…Okay."

The drive home was dreadful. Her mind was…racing. What could she say about their oldest brother? Koji and Nelly would address him as a 'saint'. To some degree of how unhinged they could all be, Shin was generally the calm and collected one, often the peacekeeper amongst them.

She'd…she'd been horrified when he graduated that he wanted to go overseas to help the Terran Initiative. All they knew of war was…was death. It meant someone was going to try to kill you. She…she had been so mad that his selflessness was selfish to them. Just…that was her brother, 'the saint'. He caught her with her first boyfriend just making out. That's all it was going to be, she was sure of that, but he…he didn't tell Koji or Nelly. If it'd been them, oh God. But Shin…?

He came back from his first tour of duty mostly the same. Maybe a little more cavalier since he'd been away from home for half a year. She…really hadn't spent too much time with him in the scheme of things. She had just…been caught up in her own problems. He knew she had them but she…she couldn't tell him. Again, it was such a petty thing to stress someone with real problems out with. On top of her problems, she just watched her twin be an absolute pompous, selfish asshole during that time in horror. Shin was literally in two battles before he got home and Tony was complaining about not having money neatly dropped off in his credit card so he could goof off all day.

Biting her lip, she prayed it was just some…inconvenience with Shin right now. She didn't…didn't want Shin to have gone thinking that his siblings were selfish brats. Save for Shaun, both she and Tony had…hadn't been there enough when they last had him around. Tony…God, Tony. He almost had Shin getting into fist fights on his behalf. Shin probably thought they were…brats. Or worse.

When she arrived at the mansion, she panicked. Everyone was home, even Nelly which was increasingly rare. He had spent more of his time at college to make up for his lackluster first semester. It looked like Tony was here too and Shaun's motorcycle was haphazardly parked. Oh…oh.

Jill ran into the house, her heart thundering in her ears. Running through the hallway, she came to a screeching halt in the kitchen. Yagami Yamada, their usually stoic yet calm and collected father, was seated at the table with his face in his hands, shaking. Oh. Jill helplessly looked around, her brothers standing there in…confusion, Koji leaning against the wall with his arms crossed. Nelly was leaning against the counter beside Shaun. Her mother was seated on the other end of the table, staring. "…Yama, Jill's here. What's going on?"

Looking to Tony, Jill was briefly provoked to slap him since he looked…irritated, like this was an inconvenience, like none of them even mattered. This…this was still all they had in this room, why did he care so little about them?

Her dad never surfaced, his breath echoing against his palms. Jill took a seat and stared at him. In…her heart, she knew. Just…

"…Shin is dead."

No. This was…this was far worse.

"…What the hell are you talking about?" Koji whispered.

Their father just rested his fingertips against his forehead, his body trembling. "…His…his leader called me, told me that…that Shin was…was doing a supply run and-and that…that the last tracking they had had him over water and they…they can't…find him or his body. I-I got a follow-up, over a hundred people are missing and they've been looking for five days. They-they can't find him and they've declared him dead."

"…Oh my God" Nelly rasped.

Jill choked, covering her mouth as her chest closed and squeezed. Oh God. Oh God. "N-No. No."

Tony stared at their dad…before walking away because this was just a gigantic inconvenience. Jill dissolved into sobbing, retching. No, this…this was beyond worse.

"…N-Nothing, huh? Got no feelings for this one either?"

Confused, she looked up as Nelly icily voiced these words. What? He was staring angrily at Koji…who appeared very passive. What? Why?! Koji looked away but he didn't seem…sad. What was wrong with them? "…I feel…concerned."

"Concerned?" Nelly demanded.

Koji shut his eyes, shaking his head. Nelly balled his fists, stalking closer, "Can you get your mind out of fucking fairy tale mode for once? Shin is not miraculously out there alive somewhere, waiting to get back here! He wouldn't just go magically missing if something wasn't gravely wrong, you dumbass!"

…What? Jill gaped at Koji incredulously. What? He went down in the water, in the ocean, Shin couldn't survive that! "I won't argue with you, Nelly."

"You are ridiculous-" Nelly snapped, starting at his twin.

"Nerimaru."

Oh. Mama. They all looked to her and Jill…expected her to be in shambles. That was her child, her firstborn. Instead, much like Koji, she seemed calm. What?

"…Not you too."

Dana folded her hands, shaking her head, "…It…it doesn't feel right. When…when he got shot, I felt something. I can't describe it but I felt for his life. I…I don't feel it here right now. And I-I may be wrong but I…I'm not ready to accept this just yet."

Why?! Why else would Shin be missing?! Jill wasn't flabbergasted but she was sick. How could they be this…optimistic? Her papa…actually chuckled. It was coarse. Bitter. Defeated. "…You and your faith."

"What would you have me do, Yamada?"

"Look at the facts: he was in a dangerous situation that had his life on the line and they finally managed to take it from him hours before he was supposed to come home!" Yamada snapped, slamming his palms on the table. His face was flushed and his eyes were glossy. He'd lost a child.

Her mama leaned back, staring at her father. How? Didn't they know this defiance was just as hurtful as the loss?! This didn't make sense! "…Cope how you need to, Yama. I already made the promise and I'll keep it."

"You're carrying an empty load" he hissed.

"I'm carrying what I need to" she countered simply, "And until they deliver my firstborn's, whom I dragged myself through the mud to see live, corpse in a coffin, I'm not burying him."

She couldn't take this. Jill launched to her feet, wanting to scream at them. Nothing worked out correctly, why couldn't any of them see that? This whole existence was just a gigantic mess of things not working out! After everything they'd gone through, how can they possibly believe?!

The declarations strangled her and she was robbed of the breath to utter them. Instead, she rushed away to her room to cry, Nelly calling after her. This…this was far worse.

…School would end one day and all those untrue rumors and people would fade away in time. She'd…get her life back possibly. But Shin…Shin would never come back and he…he died thinking some of them were too self-centered to care. He wouldn't come back.

This…this was agony.

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"Jesus" Koji muttered.

Jill weakly sat in Shin's section of the house, staring into a threshold that may never be inhabited again, at least not by its rightful owner. It was the next day and…she'd hoped some sense or something would have settled into Koji and her mom but it didn't seem so. Koji was still…resolute and her mother had actually packed her main machines and a ton of fabric from her shop to come home. She…was keeping vigil for Shin's return. They…they were serious. How?

While Koji and mama were gathered and calm, their father? Not so much. He apparently woke up early this morning and raced Shin's Toyota Supra out of here with the Honda in the trunk. Yamada had yelled that it had to go, despite everyone's, except Tony, who went to fucking work, request that he not. Dana had looked panicked then, standing in the driveway as their father sped away, kicking up dust. "…Koji, Nelly, there's some lock and key doorknobs in the garage. Can you install them on Shin's bedroom doors for me and give me the keys?"

…What did it matter? Who were they even saving things for? It didn't matter. Koji and Nelly silently did what they were told, currently drilling the locks into place while their father was away. Like he couldn't kick them down. Nelly was working on Shin's entertainment room the door over, his jaw taut. "…This is a reaction to losing someone, something you clearly don't understand."

Usually Koji was the irate one, the hothead that would be blazing and ready to start a fight. Nelly apparently took the role as Koji was being the measure headed one…incorrectly. He was an inferno all other scenarios but the one he should be emotional about. He just quietly continued to work before saying softly, "…If Shin is gone, and I mean 'if', I would hope dad would allow us to keep some sentiments of his. Shin wasn't only his son."

…Oh. Jill swallowed hard at that as Nelly shot Koji a brief look. Pursing his lips, Nelly muttered, "…Well, I guess I agree to that—the keeping sentiments part, not the blatant defiance of sensibility."

"Whatever."

Nelly surged the drill, pulling away and dropping it by his side, his brown eyes raging as he turned to Koji. "You really can't grasp this, can you? They lost track of him. He went down in the fucking water, KOJI. Shin is not Superman! Whatever bullshit you made him promise, life doesn't work out like that!"

"Maybe it doesn't" Koji murmured, picking a screw up out of the packet, "…But you're not going to force your feelings on me, Nerimaru. I'm ready to wait and keep hope and you're not. That's all there is to it and you can get the fuck off me about it."

Jill looked to Nelly for his response. He…was just red. He probably was ready to physically attack Koji because that's how they were sometimes, just…ready to fight. Nelly…wanted to commiserate with someone and usually that was Koji. It couldn't be Koji if they weren't even in the same book, let alone not on the same page. Nelly stomped past them, marching down the steps and slamming the door of the house behind him. Staring after him, Jill glowered back at Koji. His brows were furrowed but he was still focused on his task. Ugh.

"…He needs you, Koji. He needs you to show compassion, especially since even mama won't. Dad can't, he's a wreck. Nelly needs you."

With a sigh, Koji pulled the door shut and locked it before walking over to finish Nelly's portion. "…What would you have me do, imoto?"

"Be sensible. Life is terrible and terrible things happen!" she declared.

"So do good things."

About to bite at him about how could he possibly say that, she recoiled. Staring at her brother who…was not a hundred percent aware about how exactly terrible life could be due to his own experiences, Jill grimaced and looked down. Right…she knew…exactly how terrible life was. Koji was…was missing a few chapters. "…Yes, nii-san."

"I'm not belittling your feelings, Jill, or Nelly's or dad's, I never want you to think that" he said softly, looking to her, "Just…my gut isn't letting me go in that direction yet, okay? Like mom said, maybe we're wrong, maybe we're crazy, but…I know Shin. Shin's not a…he's not someone that submits when the going gets tough, that's…that's why I was able to support him. He might have had his doubts but I know the type of person he is. You guys do what you need to live with this, I just…I'm not there."

…Still. "…I respect your hope, Ko-chan."

Even when it was misguided. He smiled and stood, picking up the plastic containers, "You needn't patronize me, princess. I'm okay being the insane one, as usual."

Somehow she had to pout at that as he collected the power tools, heading back down the steps, "How's Tony?"

"How should I know?" she muttered angrily, "He doesn't even care. We're just garbage to him."

Surprisingly, Koji glanced back at her with a disapproving look. "Really, Jill, that's your twin. Give him a little more credit and thought than that."

"How can you say that?" God, what was he doing, just producing positivity?!

"Just don't look at Tony as so black and white. He is definitely flawed but there's a complexity there you might be missing. I don't even think he's that far gone" Koji insisted.

He didn't even stay last night. He didn't check on any of them which was as self-centered as usual. He went to work this morning! She didn't want to delve into anything, he was a monster.

Koji insisted that he was going to make her breakfast since no one had apparently eaten in the last twenty hours. She was…far too young. Almost a newborn, in fact. All she knew was that Nelly and especially Koji had taken care of her most of her life. They all coddled her extremely and watched over her religiously up until they started college. But Koji? Koji…always protected her.

She'd gotten angry about it once. She was eleven and Koji had deterred a boy from approaching her about getting ice cream, something incessantly innocent. Nelly pulled her aside and explained it to her. It…had been explained to her one way before but the way he put it changed the perspective entirely. When…they weren't with their father, when they were born in the house of the man their mother had been forced to marry, that demon, Domo, apparently threatened her. Sexually. He…threatened to assault an infant. Koji…Koji, even at that young an age, apparently vowed with everything he had to protect her then. Nelly insisted that, even though Koji was forced to lose those memories of his own torture and assault, he still carried that feeling, that vow.

She had been…speechless. It didn't mean she liked that he terrified anything identifying as male that approached her but…she got it. It made sense. It made his hope that Shin would cross back through those doors make sense too, he…didn't have that memory of the world's injustice. Koji, even as an entire enigma, made sense to her.

Tony though? He…went off the deep end and she didn't want to understand him. She…she lost two brothers.

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"Koji?! Jill!? Nelly?!"

Jill was startled by the voice as she sat in their living room later that day, crying quietly to herself. Nelly had returned, still angry with his twin, and curled up with her, rubbing her back. Koji was doing his homework. Just…uncanny, really. About as uncanny as the voice that just interrupted this sphere of mourning clashing normalcy.

Okamoto Lyla rushed into the room. They…hadn't really seen Lyla in two years. Jill hadn't heard the gritty details but, from what she'd heard, her and Shin had had a major falling out over…well, her dad deriding them and saying her now dead brother was a worthless human being. The franticness in Lyla's eyes though indicated that…she'd not shared that opinion.

"…Hey, nee-san" Nelly murmured.

"What's going on?" she choked, "I-I saw it in the paper. They're lying, right? They're lying."

Nelly glared toward Koji who remained quiet, still working steadily, "…Per SOME people in this room, it's a lie. But…I'm sorry, Lyla, they…they can't find Shin. They say he went down in the water and…he's been gone over a week now."

Jill bit her lip as Lyla covered her mouth, whispering 'no, no, no'. "I-I didn't—I didn't even…"

Koji looked up with a frown as Lyla burst out of the room, rushing for the front door. "…Aww, shit."

He stood up and apparently…followed Lyla wherever she went. Nelly made a face and slowly shook his head. "…That…has to hurt. To…to have ended one of your longest friendships that way, to have…his last memories like that. I don't envy that."

No. Koji and Nelly, also Shaun, they…would only ever have great memories of their last days with Shin. She…spent his time here wallowing in her despair over a stupid rumor at school. Tony…spent that time being an asshole that almost got Shin into fights and screamed at him like the spoiled brat he was.

No. Speaking of value, she…didn't put any value into time with her sibling either. Like Lyla, she'd…she'd never get that valuable time back. Unlike other people, people she was born with, that…that bothered her to her core.

Two weeks. That was the amount of bereavement time that they got to take for Shin. Nelly used his but Koji went steady back to school. She thought that was a bit too extreme but he admitted he wasn't sure his disposition wouldn't just make Nelly feel worse, so he wanted to keep his distance.

Considerate. Jill wasn't even sure how Koji and mama kept it up for these two weeks. When their dad came back to discover they'd thwarted his attempts to annex Shin's memory and things from the house, he essentially went to work and didn't return. He…was a mess. And, sometimes, when Jill went to check on her mother, she'd find the woman in deep tears…before she just collected herself and seemed calm, strongly in belief that Shin was just missing. It was…nuts.

It was her fault because Shaun typically was the odd one out, he…was the youngest. She spoke of being self-centered but it took her a few days to realize she hadn't received his feelings. Alas, was she surprised to find he'd taken Koji and Dana's side? No. Just a nice split. It wasn't even without Shin but they weren't all on the same page…

Jill didn't want to come back. She wanted to take a page from her 'twin' and drop out before she had to come back to this. To hear people spread petty gossip about her after all this? It'd…it'd be too much. She swallowed hard when she parked in Diane's yard, shaking her head. But…Shin died under far more severe circumstances than adolescent shenanigans. He had wanted her to at least have a high school education and that's…that's what she'd do, no matter what it took. She…she wanted to honor his requests.

"Oh, Jilly, sweetie" Diane gushed, coming out of her large house to give her a hug, "Are you sure you're ready to go back?"

"No…but I don't have a choice" Jill admitted grimly, closing her eyes.

Diana looked resolute, holding her shoulders, "Anybody gives you any problems today, Jill, I know they'll look like shit for it."

Yea, okay. Taking a deep breath, she walked with her friend toward Subami High School and awaited the usual routine. She'd hear whispers and snickers and have to see 'whore' and 'slut' written in her locker. She might have tacks on her chair or in her shoes. People…were miserable.

Entering the building, she kept her head up as she walked through. It didn't matter. She…she would get through this. For…for all she failed to enjoy with him while he was alive, she'd keep his wishes. For Shin.

Alas, she couldn't help notice that people…weren't whispering, kind of quietly keeping their heads down and not saying anything. When she went to her locker, there were no angry messages at all. No, just…her shoes the way she last left them. What…? Almost amazed, she walked to her classroom and was met by more silence. Was…was Diane right? Were people concerned about the appearance of harassing someone that just lost a close relative?

…She would have never traded Shin for this.

Glum despite this…blessing, if it could be ordained such, Jill made her way through the day in a fog. Her friends were concerned, saying they all had to leave today for appointments and Nanette was home sick. Jill assured she'd be fine, that…no one would bother her, that they couldn't bother her.

Wrong again. When the final class released, Jill collected her things and requested the last bit of makeup work from her teachers. They all issued their condolences and those that had taught Shin were saddened because he was such a good person and student. One made the offhand remark 'if only he'd utilized his talent somewhere else'. Jill…didn't know what to think of that except it kind of panged in her chest. She…didn't like it.

"Hey, look, the slut is back! Thought we'd finally gotten rid of her!"

Maro. Jill was placing things in her locker, replacing her shoes. Looking up, her eyes narrowed as the bastard and his cronies approached. Yea. Wrong again. Maro looked smug, like he'd just missed these two weeks of torture he dished. Two weeks of sitting at home knowing she'd never see her brother again made his torture meaningless.

Putting her bag over her shoulder, she was prepared to head out when one of the girls in Maro's midst heckled, "Heard about your brother. That's really too bad."

It was the tone. Jill turned to look at her, closing her hand. "…It is. Hopefully you never lose a sibling."

"Ha, whatever" Maro snorted, "It was really his own fault anyway."

…What? Jill stared at him. "…What did you say?"

"You heard me. It was his own fault! What kind of stupid dumbass gets caught up in someone else's problems? He got what he deserved" scoffed Maro.

This son of a bitch. His parrot girlfriend laughed, "That's what everyone thinks, stupid. They're just too much of a punk to say it to you."

Oh. So people…were still miserable wastes of air. "Then 'people' can go to hell and your ugly asses better stay the hell out of my face talking about my onii-san" Jill spat, her jaw clenched.

"Or what are you gonna do about?" the bitch sang, shoving her.

Done. Just…done. Call her Yagami Koji's sister, she was beating this bitch's ass. Pulling her arm back, she punched the nameless trash in the face.

She squealed, seeming shocked, as Jill came around and swung on her again. Everyone in the group looked shellshocked as Jill began to motion toward pinning her to the ground. Enough. Enough.

"H-Hey, bitch, stop it!" Maro snapped.

At first, she wasn't…quite sure what happened. It hurt, whatever it was, blinding her for a second and sending her toppling to the ground. When her vision allowed her to process, it found that Maro had apparently slugged her across the face, standing over her with his fist balled.

Jill gaped up at him. It…wasn't particularly incredulity that he'd hit her, no. She started it, at least the completely physical portion. She didn't have to hit whoever his bitch girlfriend was, it simply was a shove. However, before her eyes, Maro's dead body flashed. Koji came home every day now to get news on Shin and he waited to see her. He was going to see her with a GIGANTIC bruise and commit homicide.

"Oh my God" she squeaked, "My brother's going to go to prison."

"Dude, her brother's going to kill you and us!" squealed a guy in Maro's posse.

Maro blanched as apparently the general consensus in the group was he had fucked up. A majority of them scattered, just leaving Maro there with his battered girlfriend who looked incredulous at this reaction. "Y-You bunch of punks! Who's her brother anyway?!"

She was, literally, new here so she was not aware. Maro quickly grabbed the naïve girl's hand and ran, leaving Jill on the ground. Assholes. Staggering to her feet, her mind racing, she quickly grabbed her things and rushed for her car. Makeup.

She…she needed makeup to cover the bruise! Rushing to her car, overturning it before she finally got it to start, she went to the store to hopefully find something heavy to cover this. No, Koji would not jokingly handle this, he was on edge despite his optimism. This? This would push him over and she-she didn't want to lose him too.

Rushing in, she searched through the makeup aisle and located a thick foundation that should match her close enough. She picked it up and rushed to the front to purchase it. Really, she'd hoped it wouldn't bruise but the cashier gave her a look. "…Are you all right?"

"A-Ah, yes."

Great, now to get home before she got too many witnesses. Forcing the change into her purse, she almost made it out the door…

"Jill?"

She froze. Looking to her side, the side where she'd been struck, she found her twin brother standing there, holding a box. He stared at her, bewildered, before his brows furrowed deeply. "…What the hell happened to your face?"

"N-Nothing! Gotta go!"

"Jill, did someone hit you?" Tony demanded, setting the box down to get closer to her.

No, no, no. "J-Just leave me alone, Tony, I'm fine!"

Escaping his questioning, she jumped into her car and sped off for home, tears rolling down her face. Oh, this…this…this was bad. How could this get any worse at this point?

"I-I don't know if I can do it, nii-san" she sobbed.

…She might not have what it takes.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Optimism was absent. She had none, Jill was certain of that. But, was she entirely and completely thankful that the universe granted her favor when she got home. Yes. Koji had to head back early, Nelly was at school, her mom was on a rush order, her dad was still exiling himself to work, and Shaun's friend, Ann, had taken him out to get something to eat. Thank God.

Pressing a cold compress to her face for the swelling, Jill miserably tried to do her homework. She couldn't…focus on this anymore. It seemed so meaningless in the scheme of things, especially after getting hit at school for getting angry at monsters that spoke badly of her dead brother after two weeks. Jill dropped her pencil to hold her pulsing head. Maybe…maybe she could transfer to Wensington, the other nearby school. She…she wanted to keep her vow to her brothers but after this…?

Jill jumped when there was a knock at the door. Oh God, who was it? Terrified, she stammered, "W-Who is it?"

"Ann."

Oh. Okay. Standing up, Jill slowly opened the door, a bit…puzzled. Sure enough, it was Annaliese "Ann" Robins, Shaun's growing closer friend from school. Shaun seemed very taken with her, declaring she was from Wasaba and that her dad ran a maintenance shop. Apparently Ann was very skilled at fixing and repairs too. Her dad's family was from America but he'd spent his whole life here, growing up, in fact, around Jill's dad. Her mom was also not from Japan, having moved here under similar circumstances as her spouse. Ann advised that the woman died in a house fire when she was four so she doesn't really remember her much…

Jill's eyes widened as Ann handed her a bag of food from what looked like McDonalds. "Shaun said you probably haven't eaten but that you hate his guts so he asked me to bring this up to you."

Sulking, Jill grumbled, "I do not 'hate his guts', he's just too damn…hopeful for me right now."

Ann snorted, "It is sort of crazy. Where'd you get the shiner?"

Dang it. Jill groaned, walking back into her room as the fourteen-year-old followed. "You don't seem like the type that gets into fights. Boyfriend?"

"God, no" Jill mumbled, "…It's a long story. Please don't tell Shaun, I want to try to keep it hidden for now."

"Because you wanna get revenge on your own, gotcha" Ann nodded.

Somehow, Jill just…smiled at that, wide-eyed. Ann was…very much a Wasaba type person. Very brash and street savvy. She was a beautiful young woman, a little short and lanky, her face gracefully covered with many freckles, and her naturally red hair pulled back into a ponytail. People probably underestimated her because she was pretty but Ann probably would have kicked that whole group's ass today. "Y-Yea."

… "Ann, can…can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"…I know you were really young when you lost your mom but you…you probably still remember her. Does…does it get any easier?"

Ann made a face. "…I guess that's one good thing about Shaun not believing your brother's dead, he hasn't asked me that yet."

Oops. "I-I'm sorry, forget it."

"It's easier because it has to be. You don't have a choice unless you end it all or you just stop focusing on anything else" Ann said bluntly.

…Damn. Ann looked off before shrugging, "The hardest part is knowing you don't get to make new memories with them. You only get to hold on to the old stuff but that…the story ends right there, it's difficult. You…you don't know what to do without that character and then you just…have to keep going."

…Oh. Jill swallowed, aware of how…story writing went. "…We…really have to keep writing with a character gone."

"I guess."

…Okay. "Thank you, Ann, for the food and that."

Ann nodded and left. Jill opened the bag and nibbled at the fries, pressing the ice pack to her face. So…she had to keep just going, huh? Just…let the story flow even though a main character was missing. That…

That was simply the worst feeling.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

…Life was going to be long.

She woke up early the following morning, dabbed on a quarter of a bottle of makeup, put a hoodie on despite it being early July, pulled the hood up, and fled the house. Did she need to? No. Her dad was still hiding out at work, her mom was asleep, Nelly and Koji were still butting heads, Tony was gone, and Shaun was still about his normal routine since Shin wasn't dead in his mind. She…was alone here.

Driving herself to school, she went about her normal routine. Diane nor Daisy thought anything of her sudden fashion choice. Good, she…she'd let them get hit by the rumor mill at school.

When they arrived, Jill prepared for people to call her violent or finally say, 'yea, we agreed with her: your brother did deserve it!'. Her stomach felt heavy and sick. Maybe…she could seriously request to change schools.

…Once again, she was startled to find most of her classmates still not paying her any mind and her locker unbothered. Oh. Maybe…maybe they were over her. Huh.

Jill grimaced when suddenly there was confused chattering in the halls. Oh no, was it Maro? Maybe Maro was still stirring up nonsense…looking up, following the train of gossip, even she was confused as hell.

Yagami Tony had wandered out of what looked to be the locker rooms. The hell? What was he doing here? She stared at her twin in complete befuddlement as he adjusted a…school uniform on his torso. He looked entirely, absolutely, and completely disgruntled. Daisy looked stunned. "…Did your brother decide to come back to school?"

Unlikely! A couple of Tony's friends approached him, questioning. He…just shrugged. What?!

Well, this was weird and far more interesting than her nonsense! Tony caught sight of her as she marched up to him. "Tony, what is going on?"

"…Nothing. Just bored of work, thought I'd come back to school for a while" he grumbled.

"Um, what?"

Tony gave her something of a look and she almost squealed. DUMMY, what made you walk up to a family member with this glob of makeup on your face? "O-Oh, okay!"

God, idiot. Before he could question or demand, the crowds started to empty, signaling class was about to start. To her pulsating horror, Tony ended up following her to the room. They had classes together, no. Tony walked to the teacher as she scurried to sit, handing him some papers…

…Wait. Tony couldn't just waltz in here and say 'I'm coming back', he didn't finish his Freshman year! Jill gawked at his…audacity as the teacher read whatever her twin handed him and also seemed shocked. Wait, did they let him?

Sure enough, Tony walked over after being given books and slammed down right beside her, thankfully not on the bad side. STILL. He looked…absolutely aggravated like he generally looked, like this was a waste of his precious time. Why did he come back then?! And why'd they let him skip a year of school?!

Jill was…just blown away. This…didn't make a lick of sense. Tony stared at the board absently as the teacher started their algebra course. God, she hated math. Some idiot once told her it's because girls were bad at math. No, her friends were brilliant at math, it had nothing to do with gender. She was terrible at it.

Trying to take diligent notes, knowing that if she ended up in cram school this year, she was not going to make it, she glanced at Tony. The teacher had written a long formula and his eyes had creased. That was one of those weird paradoxes. She was of the history and writing language preference. Tony excelled at math and science. The look in his eyes was almost like he'd…forgotten that.

He looked…cross all of a sudden, staring at his books. What? Jill stared at him…

She reached into her bag, slightly…uncertain and grabbed an extra notebook she kept for writing notes to her friends and a pencil and slid it over to him. Tony looked to her, blinking, before slowly taking the offering and flipping it open. He started to write down the formula and plug in the numbers their sensei produced. Really? He just came without any supplies? What was his deal?

Class switched to chemistry and…well, she could actually say she was okay in chemistry. Far better than any of the other sciences. Tony seemed bewildered as the teacher went over covalent bonds. Similar to algebra, they had to balance chemical formulas. He scribbled them down quickly, tapping the pen against his chin thoughtfully. If…she didn't know any better, she'd say he was enthralled.

At the end of the day, Tony looked…weary but his face had returned to his normal annoyance. Jill stared at him absently as he went out to the parking lot. "…Going to work now?"

"…No. I have to go to more school."

…Huh? "…Why?"

"It was the agreement so I could be placed in the appropriate classes" he shrugged, adjusting his bag, "I have to go to night school for the core classes until eight."

…Jeez. "O-Oh. I-I mean, Tony, it's…random, you wanting to go back. Why?"

"No reason. Where's your car?"

Dang it. "Uh, I…I park it at Diane's house since I study there after school anyway."

His icy blue eyes closed some at her, like he knew she was just full of crap. Finally, he shook his head and started toward his Mercedes. "…I'll see you at home, Jill. Thanks for the book, I'll replace it."

"N-No problem."

Standing at the front area, she…wondered if this had something to do with Shin? Maybe…maybe he wanted to…

…Bleh. She wasn't going to make anything up for him. Who knew why he wanted to come back finally? A little annoyed, she went to find Diane and the girls, a bit…frustrated.

But…she had to admit, having him here had…really deterred a lot of the behavior she'd been faced with. He had sort of lingered near her when his friends weren't excitably goofing off with him. There was a very…clear difference and she felt…as good as she could given two weeks ago she heard a member of her family died.

…Maybe just all of a sudden she didn't feel quite as alone.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Wha? What are you even doing here?"

Jill couldn't help smirk some, looking up when Shaun suddenly came to their table, looking very confused. Tony was sitting a few seats over from her, talking with his friends. Generally speaking, Shaun was on the move and in the younger class so they didn't cross each other often. Despite the fact that Tony had been back in school for two weeks now, this was apparently the first time Shaun saw him.

"…I am attending school again" Tony sulked.

The youngest just raised a brow, taking an empty seat across from him. "…For how long?"

"…Dunno. Til I'm bored again."

Baka. Dean, one of Tony's few close friends snickered, punching his arm, "Idiot, you might as well stay. You're already 11th in the damn grade, fucking overachiever."

God, it infuriated her but he just breezed in here like it seriously did not matter that he missed that first year of school. He could be his normal indifferent ass all he wanted but he was genuinely excited for chemistry and sometimes math, to the point he was in the classroom before others preparing. He tried to say, 'oh, I just need more help' but that was a lie, he took the first test and aced it. Meanwhile she'd been sitting here getting average regularly attending school! Ugh. But…then, it was hard to focus being made a mockery of.

Even though a handful of people choosing to sit at this table with Tony were guilty of belittling her as 'slut of the year', her twin seemed completely unaware that her presence would not have been accepted. Usually she sat in that corner with her three friends and other less hypocritical girls. They most likely peeled it back out of respect to him but was that supposed to make her feel better?

Jill frowned when one ornery kid she wasn't sure was Tony's friend or not sort of sneered at Shaun. What? Shaun would never hurt a fly, he was a sweetie! "…You hang out with freshman, Yagami?"

Um, what? Tony gave the guy a weird look, "…I mean, I will…make exceptions for my little brother?"

"Jesus, how many brothers do you guys have?" the boy demanded incredulously.

Jill swallowed hard. Tony gave him a stony look. She almost expected him to just…ignore it, like he had been for the last month. However… "…Less than what we once had."

Her eyes burning, Jill picked at her rice as Dean frowned deeply at the impertinent rambler, "C'mon, dude, watch it. They just lost a sibling."

"With that many, does it matter?"

…Ugh. Tony's jaw grew taut as she glared angrily at whomever. Shaun patted her back suddenly, looking calm, "…Don't let it get to you, nee-san. No one could ever get it."

With that, he got up and left as she gazed after him, startled. What? Tony stood, stuffing his hands in his pockets, "I just remembered I gotta make a phone call. You can have my dessert, Dean."

"A-Ah, okay…"

Watching after her twin, Jill…was half provoked to follow him. It…wasn't like he was upset though. Mr. Insensitive Ass looked confused. "What? I mean, c'mon!"

"Stop while you are in the ground, dead, idiot" Dean grunted. "No one wants to hear the reckless remarks of a sibling-less bastard."

Good ol' Dean. Jill gave him her dessert as well, dismissing herself to go get in some study time…maybe. She looked around for Tony but…couldn't find him. Somehow, Koji's words to her the day after Shin's passing was announced came back to her. She…thought he was just being really black and white but…maybe she was misunderstanding him. Really, after his spirited talks of hating school, she never thought she'd see him enjoying it. Also, he…finally made some sort of remark about Shin, even though it was vague.

…She guessed…he wasn't the only self-absorbed one. She wasn't sure…how Tony worked anymore. Maybe she was reading too much into it but…it was already a more complex storyline than she'd perceived. What was going on?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Nii-san, you need to stop."

Yagami Koji was stretched out on the couch, almost motionless. The sacks under his eyes were so dark and he looked far paler than he generally did, especially in the summer. Jill covered him with a blanket, pouting. She…didn't want to create a hierarchy. And she didn't, just…even if he drove her nuts with his protectiveness, if something ever happened to Yagami Koji, especially after Shin? There was no amount of motivation she'd be able to find to go on.

But he just covered his face, mumbling. He'd sauntered in around seven on this Wednesday evening and asked if they'd heard anything. No. They weren't going to hear anything different. He was driving an hour every single day to come home and see if they'd 'heard anything'. Optimism…had its limits.

After he insisted he do chores, his body finally said 'enough' and he ended up passing out. He clearly couldn't move, exhausted. His body was sturdy but it had cracks. He had to maintain himself and he wasn't doing that right now. She stroked his hair and pouted at him. "Nii-san, just…rest, please? For me?"

Looking very cross, he finally shut his eyes and grumbled, "…Fine. Just this once I will take a day and rest. I guess I won't miss anything too pertinent right now."

Smiling at that, Jill kissed his forehead as he dozed right off into a heavy slumber. Baka. He…he was really hopeful.

It'd been almost two months now and…nothing. Nothing. The more time passed, the more Koji should have lost hope. And…she could tell he sort of was. He looked a little…dejected when mama reported she'd heard nothing now. The woman in question though, she…she still seemed strong and resilient. Jill went to the hospital to check on her dad since he wasn't coming back here, apparently, and he was just…destroyed. Two…months.

Jill looked up when she heard the front door open. It was about 8:30 so that usually meant Tony. Indeed, her twin walked in, his face drawn and tired. She smiled at him. "…Okaeri."

"Mm. Tadaima."

Yawning into the back of his hand, he looked to Koji, his eyes closing some. "…Why is he here?"

"Mm, he came to check to see if we heard anything."

"…Sure."

She frowned as he rubbed his blue eyes, mumbling, "…Did…did you want to go grab something to eat?"

Eh? Startled, Jill stared at him as he sleepily stuffed his hands in his pockets, his eyes shut as he was clearly about to collapse. "I-I wouldn't mind but I can make you something, you look exhausted."

He waved a hand, mumbling, "Nah, I'm fine. I'm starving. I was thinking kaiten-zushi."

…Usually, the brothers would all go there. It wasn't like she wouldn't go but…she always wrapped herself up in something unrelated when they went. She…supposed she better not take it for granted. "T-That sounds good."

Tony nodded solemnly, rubbing his face for the umpteenth time. "Great. Uh…can you drive?"

"Sure" she smiled, standing.

"Bring me some tekkamaki…" mumbled Koji.

Jill almost laughed. It was the closest she'd come in a while. "I thought you were asleep, nii-san."

"I'm hungry and sleepy…" he grumbled petulantly.

With a smirk, Tony drawled, "Then get up and let's go."

"Sure, if they can just deliver the sushi to the floor where I'll be lying in a coma…" he groaned, turning over on his side.

Petting his hair, Jill smiled warmly. They were…still so silly. "I'll get you some sushi, nii-san. We'll be back in a few."

Walking with Tony to the door, she jumped, a little surprised, to find Shaun outside kind of…behind their mother's car. Huh? Her brows furrowed when another young man popped up beside him. Oh…Luke. He was another of Shaun's new…friends. He had dirty blond messy hair, shaggily hanging in his face over his dark blue eyes. He nodded at them, patting Shaun's shoulder as the younger looked…startled? "I'll see you tomorrow, Shaun."

"Oh, yea."

Luke climbed onto an old motorbike and waved at them as he sped up the driveway. Huh? Tony blinked languidly at Shaun who was scratching his forehead. "…We're going for conveyor belt sushi. You game?"

"Huh? Uh, sure."

…What was wrong? Truly confused, they went to her car and Shaun got in the back seat while Tony got in the front. Since it was a nice night, she put the top down and they cruised the few minutes to the restaurant in silence, just light music echoing from her radio.

'Cause we lost it all. Nothin' lasts forever. I'm sorry I can't be perfect. Now it's just too late and we can't go back. I'm sorry I can't be perfect…

Tony rested his chin in his palm, staring out into the just setting sun. "…Can I turn this off, Jill?"

"Eh…? Um, sure."

He clicked off the radio and the silence was only thicker. Woah boy, this was going to be…some dinner.

When they arrived, there wasn't much of a wait since it was a Tuesday. Taking a seat next to Tony, her brother reached and grabbed the first roll without abandon, Shaun doing the same. God, boys. She snickered, shaking her head, and carefully selected her dish.

"So, Jill…"

Hmm? Tony had a roll pinned in his chopsticks, staring ahead at the conveyor belts before clearing his throat. "…So, Dean was telling me about something."

…Oh no. "Um…what?"

"He said that some guy said…you…gave him head at a party?"

Damn it. "I didn't."

"Oh, well, I figured that" Tony rolled his eyes, "But he said the whole school has been giving you shit for it and the bastard said you blew a whole bunch of other guys in retaliation. Who is he?"

Jill glowered at her twin, shaking her head, "…It doesn't matter, Tony. He's not bothering me now."

Shaun sulked, "I didn't hear about that. Everyone always told me I have a pretty sister."

Great, the brother brigade. Rubbing her temple, Tony drank a bit of his water, grunting, "…If you don't want to tell me, don't. Just…"

He trailed off. What? Shaun shook his head, grabbing plate number two. "I mean, even if nee-san had blown some guys, who cares? Half the school has."

"Including you, baby brother?" Tony snorted.

What now? Shaun leered at Tony who just smirked at him. "Look, you two suck at being covert. You might as well bring him inside and fuck him instead of screwing around around mom's car."

Eh?! Jill stared, wide-eyed, as Shaun rolled his. What? "…I-I mean, Shaun, I-I guess I've been super self-centered but a-are you…out?"

"I don't know what I am" Shaun sulked.

What? Tony yawned, "…I mean, I won't lie: I get a little…curious but, like, that's where it stops. I almost doubt I'd even like it."

Well, this was a night of revelations. Shaun frowned, taking a bit of nigiri before nodding, "…I'm confused because I don't not like girls. Like, I really, really like girls. It's not like, society telling me that's what's normal either, I like them and I'm attracted to girls. But…I mean, I'm pretty equally attracted to guys too the same exact way. It just seems wishy washy."

Oh. "W-Well, that's bisexuality, right?" Jill questioned.

"Maybe. Luke says he's like Tony, though, just experimenting. I don't know if he actually likes it or not or if he's just super horny."

Holy crap. "…The baby is having sex and I get a smack on the hand for even kissing a boy?" Jill demanded, growing irritated as she set her chopsticks down.

"I don't really care, go wild" Shaun said simply.

"Do not go wild" Tony glared at him before looking at her, "…I do apologize that it's different, Jill. It is some bullshit that it's different…but you had some 'mystery guy' you won't tell me about make up an entire story about you going down on him that spread throughout the school. There's double standards at play but we…we don't want you to get hurt."

Meh. "…I'm not having any problems, futago. And I'm going to keep in mind that I'm the only one not allowed to have a sex life because of 'double standards'."

"Who would you even want to go with at our school?" Tony sulked, reaching for a tuna roll, "It's a whole bunch of fucking losers! They're not anywhere good enough for you!"

Wow. "I had literally no idea you were like our older brothers, baka" she remarked, deadpan.

Tony scoffed before looking down. "…I wish."

What…? Jill frowned as he suddenly looked forlorn. What was the matter? Shaun, Mr. No Filter, sighed, "Yea, you're not even in the same neighborhood, let alone the same ballpark, as our nii-sans."

"You know what, ya' brat-"

She bit her lip, again surprisingly amused, as Tony put Shaun in a headlock, the latter screaming in horror that he was going to waste his sushi. So silly…but…

Not…so black and white, huh?

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

When they got back home, she…felt better. Or okay? Or…trying to fit pieces back together that weren't quite right. Koji was knocked out on the couch but, her oh so ridiculous brothers, when she set the sushi down beside him that she got made to-go, he popped right up. They…were so special to her, she…she missed Shin so much. Why…?

Sitting down at the foot of the chair, she dissolved into tears. Why? They were a family. They all…fit together perfectly so why did a piece have to get destroyed for no reason? Her sweet onii-san died…SUFFERING. Unless he just instantly died in an explosion, he probably suffered and he didn't deserve it but now? Now a piece of their family was missing.

Koji groaned. Mr. Hopeful. He pulled her to his side, rubbing her shoulder, "…It'll be better."

"How? How can it?" she hissed.

"I don't know. One way or another, it'll get better. Just believe me."

Yea, right. He still believed Shin was Superman which was sweet and endearing but so unpragmatic it was heinous. But she…supposed the younger would think highly of the older. Apparently, Tony did or… "Nii-san?"

"Yes, princess?"

"Remember…what you said about Tony not being so black and white?"

Koji nodded, pushing a roll into his mouth. Jill bit her lip, whispering, "I…I think I see what you mean. I…I guess as we got older, we started to drift but he's…way more complex than I remember. He's just…not very open."

Tony was quiet once again on the car ride back and, as soon as they entered the house, he retired to bed…but, understandably, he was tired. Just…was that all?

"…Maybe that's one reason I haven't given up on Shin yet, Jilly" Koji suddenly murmured, surprisingly soft, "I just…know that I still need him to be there."

…Oh. Kissing her temple tenderly, he closed the plastic bento and leaned back on the couch, closing his eyes. "…Just try to be there when Tony needs you. He might not open up to any of us but I believe he'll open up to you."

Really? "And you…be sure to open up to him a little too, okay? I'm sorry we made you guys so withdrawn."

Pouting, Jill shook her head miserably, "…You didn't. Life did."

"Life can go suck a dick" Koji groused, "…We're all we have for right now, imoto. That may change one day but…you'll never be alone, understand?"

…Maybe.

"Oh my God, Jill, I work with this sexy guy. I think he's perfect for you!"

Jill raised a brow as she pressed her phone to her ear, putting things away in her locker. Self-centered 101 again, she didn't notice Daisy was missing. The girl had to start working because her family was going through a rough patch. She was still attending school but had to leave pretty much during study hall to start her shift at a grocery store. Taking her brother's words to heart, she checked up on her friend. That had to be rough.

"Oh yea?"

"Yes. He's blond with blue eyes and he's tall. Perfect!"

Snickering, Jill droned, "He sounds like he could be my brother, dork. What's his name?"

"Um, Isazaki or something? I don't know his first name! Want me to ask him?"

"No!" she laughed, "Just focus on working. I'll try to come by and scout this 'perfect guy' one day."

"Look at that: her brother just dies and she's already dick hopping!"

Oh no.

Jill was…in slight disbelief that this being was going to speak to her after punching her in the face. She slowly turned her head to confirm that Maro and his parrot girlfriend were back, their same crew still around them. What? "…I'll call you back, Daisy."

"Eh? Jill-"

Clicking off, Jill stared at him through narrowed eyes. "…You have some audacity speaking to me after last time. I thought you learned."

"Learned what? That the legends are bullshit?" Maro sneered, "Your pussy brother didn't even show up!"

"Because, dumbass, I don't want my brother going to jail over your worthless ass" Jill countered briskly. "I didn't tell him."

"Yea right. The Yagami are just a bunch of punks" snorted girlfriend.

Sure, whatever. Prepared to separate from this situation again, she jumped when Maro grabbed her arm roughly, looking snide. "So, whose dick are you running to now, huh?"

"Get your hands off of me."

"Why? You didn't do shit about it when I hit you last time, you must like that shit!"

God. God, why were her brothers right? If this was the loser pool she had to choose from, she may as well become a nun! Snapping her wrist away, she opened her mouth to tell him to go to hell. Instead, the moment was replaced by a chuckle.

Freezing, Jill looked back in wide-eyed shock as Tony sauntered up, his hands in his pockets, Dean nearby. "…Took longer than I wanted it to but I figured the fucker that hit my sister was going to surface. Wasn't expecting a fucking guy either."

Maro looked startled. Tony…was about four inches taller, hit by a growth spurt some months ago. His girlfriend looked nervous as Tony positioned himself in front of Jill. "I'm not good at mincing words so I'll just say it upfront: if I ever see you near my sister again, I'm ending your life, son of a bitch."

No, no, no. "Tony-"

"You're gonna do what by yourself, trash?" spat Maro, his group crowding.

Dean cracked his neck, approaching, "When you're dealing with cowards, two people are plenty."

"What is this, West Side Story or the Beat It video?"

Jill's heart raced as Shaun appeared from the gym area, Ann with him. The youngest raised a brow at Tony who looked…enraged. What was this?! When did this become a showdown?! "…This guy punched Jill in the face, Shaun. Either put up or get out."

Shaun looked confused, his brown eyes closing some, "What?"

"Sluts ought to get punched in the face!" Maro proclaimed.

Jill grimaced. Why…? Tony stared, tilting his head…before smiling, blinking…coyly at Maro's girlfriend, "What? She blew a few dudes, right? Funny, don't think she's in short company."

The girl blanched. Maro stared before looking at her then looking at Tony…and gawking. "…Did you fuck my girlfriend?"

"Maybe? I fuck a lot of girls. I'm the slut here" Tony shrugged.

Yea, no kidding. Maro gritted his teeth, screaming, "I-I'll fuck you up, Yagami!"

"What's wrong? My sister didn't even give you the time of day, did she? She shouldn't, everyone behind you is a fucking loser" Tony taunted.

God, he was still a brat! "That's it, Yagami: I'm ending this now!"

"Bring it on, prick!"

Jill gawked as Maro threw the first punch and Tony retaliated in full. Maro's girlfriend squealed, quickly scurrying away while the other guys jumped in to fight Tony. How did this even happen?! Dean pushed her back and threw himself into the fray. Not a second later did not only Shaun dive in, so did Ann!

…Well, Koji apparently was right yet again: she wasn't alone.

…She was surrounded by psychopaths.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Yagami-san, your presence here in school was on a probationary period. Starting a mob fight does not reflect well upon you."

Principal Tabata, generally a very calm and kind man, was sitting behind the desk, staring at them pensively as they were gathered in his office. Jill smiled in horror, her hands folded in her lap, sitting between a slightly bruised Tony and Shaun, Dean slouched back casually beside the former and Ann sitting beside the latter with her arm stretched across the back of the chair. On the other side, all seven assailants including Maro were buckled over, groaning.

"The Girlfriend" had run off and told that 'the Yagami siblings had started a fight'. She was currently trying to treat Maro's pretty thick wounds but he kept pushing her hands away, glowering. Yep. Hypocrites.

Tony looked unbothered by Tabata's declaration, blinking his slightly swollen eye. "…Yes sir."

Shaun pouted his broken lip, grumbling, "Tony didn't even start it though."

"He did so!" snapped Maro, his jaw the size of a balloon.

"It's unusual that Maro-san hasn't been in a fight in his high school career until you came back, Tony-san" Tabata analyzed.

Ugh, he should have had his ass kicked several times before now. Tony pursed his lips as Dean looked to him absently. No, no, no. Tony…Tony was good at school! This-this asshole was going to take this from him when he'd been working so hard?! Jill gritted her teeth, balling her fists. This couldn't get any worse.

There was a light knock at the door. Tabata looked up, drawling, "Come in."

His secretary peeked in, smiling…weirdly, "Um, the…Yagami guardian has arrived."

Oh, mama was going to have a fit. She was not trying to hear they were making trouble at school while she was waiting for the body of her oldest child! Jill looked up woefully…before the air was snatched from her body.

"…I…was not expecting to see you in this office ever again" Tabata said, baffled.

"Hey, Tabata" greeted one Yagami Koji.

Jill couldn't exactly…hear, because her heart was jumping back and forth in her ears. No, no, no, no, NO-O-O-O. Tony stared before whispering, "…Jill? Jill, I…I can't feel my arm, I think I'm having a heart attack."

"Me too" she breathed.

Koji bowed to Tabata, someone he was probably a little too acquainted with from his turbulent time in high school. "My mom couldn't make it. She also thought this was ample payback for the amount of times she had to come down here to bail me out after a fight."

Mama, no! Tabata rubbed his brow, "Well…I would hate to bother her with this after your brother's passing."

"Mm."

Tipping his head at them, Tabata explained, "Your brothers and a few accomplices apparently got into a fight with the other side of the room. Per Kawaguchi-san, it was instigated by your brothers and sister."

That…bitch. Koji crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. Shaun smiled awkwardly, looking full away as Tony and Jill tried not to die on the spot. If…it were Nelly, it'd be fine. Nelly wasn't one for details. However, Detective Koji Yagami, perceptive to a fault?

Indeed, their oldest brother walked over to them, grasping Tony's jaw and turning his face before going to Shaun. His brow drooped before he wandered over to the other side of the room, his arms returning to their fold as he observed Maro and his gang. While Maro and Kawaguchi, apparently parrot's name, looked defiant because they were idiots, his group looked absolutely and completely petrified.

"Koji, what are you doing?" Tabata groaned.

Rubbing his chin, Koji stared at Maro and nodded. "…I really didn't think the youngest had it in them. Kudos."

Oh God. Tabata leered, "Koji, you don't mean to praise your siblings for starting a fight, do you?"

Koji leaned over, peering rather rudely into a few of the guy's faces as they actually saw a couple of them start to sweat. "Well, you see, Tabata-san, if you look at my brothers' records, even before the one dropped out, they never got into fights. So, I can't help but find it unusual they picked this strange day to just start one."

"We're not lying" Kawaguchi snarled, her arms also crossed defensively.

Jill couldn't even look at him but she knew Koji was looking to her now. Oh God, please, please, she was wrong, this could get worse, just let it end here. "Why's my sister here again?"

No-o-o. Tabata sighed, "She also was implicated as starting the fight, Koji."

"That's laughable" Koji droned.

"Koji-"

Koji patted his cheek, staring off as if he were musing, "We're rather on edge right now, Tabata, with what happened to Shin. You know best that I'm very protective of my sister but, well, we can tend to be a little protective of one another. So, the way this seems to me, my typically passive little brothers and their comrades got into it because someone was saying something about my unbruised and unrumpled sister."

'Oh my God, he's Sherlock Holmes' rasped Shaun under his breath as Jill rapidly shook her head, "N-Nii-san-"

"So, what did you do to my little sister, hmm?" Koji questioned, smiling down at the "defendants".

Okay, if…they just…kept their mouths shut, everything could be fine. Why, Tony could go to Wensington! They could all go to Wensington and start fresh and forget any of this happened and Koji wouldn't commit a homicide! Everything could still be great!

"So what if I hit the bitch? It's her own fucking fault for being so stuck up" spat Maro.

The air just voided from the room, Jill having to cover her mouth to keep from screaming not because of anything that was just directed at her but the fact that he just said that to Koji DAMN Yagami. Shaun was fully gawking, actually reaching to grip her knee because no. Even Tabata looked horrified, having leapt to his feet.

A split second. It would literally take Koji a slip of a second to have careened Maro through a glass window. Tony, somehow, shockingly, managed to get up and dart between Koji and Maro, smiling and wide-eyed, holding his hands up. "N-Nii-san, wait. I-I handled this one. I'm Jill's twin, I-I need to handle some of these cases sometimes. L-Let me just have this one this time, please?"

Tabata blurted, "I-I hadn't gotten that far yet, Koji, I was entirely unaware this was provoked. W-We'll just call this a wash an-and Tony, Shaun, and Jill are free of reprimand."

"What?" Kawaguchi yelled, "W-"

Finally, one of Maro's 'henchman' hissed, "Will you just shut your stupid mouth and read this room?!"

Please. Jill stared helplessly as Tony looked at Koji beseechingly. Koji hadn't…said anything, he actually didn't seem all that taken aback. Perhaps because he'd heard crazy things directed at her for years and he was just used to physically reacting. He gazed at Tony rather emptily for a silent moment before he looked to the crowd, his eyes just locked to each of their faces. Oh God.

"…Okay, Tony."

…Oh. Koji patted Tony's shoulder, nodding, "You did good."

Jill felt…oh God, relief. She stood and clasped her hands, smiling as Tony rested his hand over his heart, breathing out. Oh God, it worked out.

"…Ish."

Eh? In a ludicrous blink and miss moment, Koji managed to reach past Tony, grab the front of Maro's blazer, and one arm sling him across the room against a bookcase Tabata had. Kawaguchi squealed loudly as all of Maro's henchman screamed, scattering to hide in the corner. Oh.

Shaun just sighed while Tony stared in the direction of Maro's form that Koji flung like a ragdoll. Fucking…Koji Yagami. While she expected him to go over and beat Maro into the ground, startling her, he turned on his heel and walked toward the door. "I'm taking my kids, Tabata."

Koji swept his hands over the group, including Dean and Ann, directing them to leave. Tabata stammered, "D-Dean and Ann aren't your kids."

"Sure they are. C'mon, kids."

"Yes, dad" Ann and Dean said drolly, somehow in unison.

Jill quickly followed behind her brother, Shaun and Tony dragging in the rear of the group. Ann yawned into her hands, stretching, "Well, that was a lot more fun and entertaining than I expected to get over in this side of town. I gotta get to work. See you in the morning, guys."

"Yea, me too" Dean nodded before smacking Tony's shoulder, "I'll message you tonight, man."

Tony nodded weakly as just the Yagami siblings were left in the parking lot. Koji reached into his pocket and pulled out his black cigarettes, sticking one in his mouth and lighting up. Okay, it…wasn't great but…it could have been…a lot more gory. Assuming her brother hadn't been storing all of their faces in his memory so he could chase them down and murder them all later tonight.

"N-Nii-san…" Jill whimpered.

"Jill" Koji said sharply, "…I get hyper-focused on bastards being romantically or sexually involved with you. I get that that seems like something you feel you need to hide from me though you don't. But don't you ever keep some son of a bitch that hit you from any of us!"

Wincing, she rubbed her arm and looked away as he turned to stare at her hard. "Do you hear me, Jill? No one is going to put their hands on you, hit and verbally abuse you, and get away with it, Jill! Why would you keep that from me?"

"Because you're crazy and I didn't want to lose you too! You've almost killed people before for just saying things, nii-chan!" she choked.

Tears escaped her against her will, just…so overwhelmed. She couldn't do this. It…was too much. Koji rubbed his forehead, shutting his eyes tight, as Tony rubbed his own upper arm, looking down. "…You do take things too far sometimes, Koji. I…I mean, Jill didn't tell me either so I…I do get it though."

Tony… Koji squeezed the bridge of his nose, his fragrant cigarette drifting into the summer sky before he took a draw. "…I'm sorry, Tony. You…you did great standing up for Jill, I just…can't stand people that harm others unprovoked."

…Yes. Tony bit his lip, nodding, "I…I understand, Koji."

"You too, Shaun" he mumbled before looking to her, "…You? I need you to start trusting that I have some sense and won't kill someone."

Yea right. "…And, I need to work on being the person that you're comfortable sharing things with, I see. I…I might be the oldest now."

Jill stared as Koji absently looked off at the bright sky. He always seemed so criminally unbothered at times, even right now. "…I really don't want to be the oldest."

Biting her lip, her eyes burning, she nodded softly and cautiously hugged his side. He rubbed her shoulder, kissing her temple, "…Save for Tony who has class, I will remand you remaining two to home as 'punishment'. Whether I'm the oldest or not, your asses need to address someone if something is going wrong, even if it's not me."

"…Fair" Jill mumbled.

Koji pinched the end of his cigarette butt, blowing out the last of the smoke as the door to the school opened, Maro and the remaining students stumbling out. Somehow, she had to smile when Maro, looking quite injured now, saw them and froze. However, she gawked when Koji slid his finger across his neck in gesture. "KOJI."

"Little punk ass bitch. I catch him on the streets, it's fair game" Koji snarled.

"It is criminal. It is a crime if you 'catch him on the streets', Koji" Jill leered.

With a scoff, Koji turned and walked toward his car, "Get your cars or motorcycles home, I gotta take care of some things first."

Jill didn't trust that whatsoever and shook her head as he just sped off almost recklessly. Shaun gazed after him before his brows furrowed. Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he pursed his lips. "…That's the first time Koji really, really suggested that Shin might…might actually be gone."

Wincing, Jill stared at him as Shaun looked…dismayed. "…I know it's unrealistic but…"

…Faith. What a…strange thing it was. To have faith in people especially, it seemed so…chaotic. It was literally no telling how another person's presence would turn out in your life in so many different capacities. Life or death, trust or deceit, love or hatred…it was so human to believe yet so human to fail. Jill…wanted them to accept it but…

Hugging her younger brother tight, she shook her head, "…If you have the faith, Shaun, hold on to it until you can't anymore. It…won't hurt to believe right now."

"…Okay."

He pulled away, sulking, "…Well, nii-san is right about one thing, nee-san: I might not be stupid protective about basic social functions like the others but no way am I letting some guy put his hands on you either."

Jill groaned, rolling her eyes, "…I may have punched his girlfriend a few times when she made a remark that everyone thought Shin deserved to be dead and pushed me."

"Man" Shaun said, weirdly musing, "Maybe nii-san's right about that too, maybe we do need to catch them on the street."

"Shaun" Jill snickered, "Thank you but let's just…try to be peaceful, okay? I…hope no one else bothers us going forward."

"After Koji one arm threw the guy into a bookcase? Me too. I'll see you at home, nee-san."

She nodded as he walked over to his motorbike that he built with Shin before their brother left one last time. He…was such a smart young man, to…to have gotten such a totem from their sibling to always…have. Even if it broke down and wouldn't run anymore, he could always have that…

Tony started to stalk away toward his Mercedes. They…were all they had anymore. "Futago."

He paused his escape, stuffing his hands in his pockets. She looked around, thankful the ground was mostly empty aside from some sport's clubs doing warmups. Getting closer to her twin, she reached out and rubbed his arm, "…Did you really come back to school because you saw I got attacked?"

"…Maybe."

Tony… "…And now that you've…found out what happened, are you…going to drop out again?"

"Does it matter?"

"Of course it does" she sulked, "You're good at school, Tony, and whether you want to admit it or not, you love chemistry and math. And I bet mom and dad are giving you allowance again while you're doing something you love. Just…give it some thought."

Tony just nodded. Ugh, like a brick wall. Coming to face him, she stared at him. He was stony as usual, avoiding her gaze. "…What's wrong, Tony?"

"Nothing's wrong. Everything's great."

"That is sure as hell pushing it, Tony. Do you know how long this has been on me? Since you dropped out of school, I…I've been trying to get over this…this whole 'being a slut' rumor" she whispered, "It…it messed with me so much t-that I was stupidly distracted with it and-and trying to cope with friends while I didn't—I didn't spend nearly any time with Shin and now he's gone. I was selfish a-and now it's over."

Ugh. Tears rolling down her face, she was about to…dismiss herself. Yes, she was…pretty certain that this chapter was over. If she understood the rumor mill that created this monster, this occurrence of her brother throwing someone across a room was about to slay it. Maro's cronies would probably even say she never even told anyone and this was still the result. It was over…and so…so was her ability to make any memories with Yagami Shin. The…really last one she remembered fondly was riding in the car with him, Koji, and Nelly, listening to music and goofing off. That…was two years ago. That…was it.

"You? You're selfish? Are you dumb?"

Jill looked up, startled. Tony was glaring hard at her. What? "Wha?'

"Were you the one that was busy trying to two time two different girls by telling them both you wanted a relationship when you didn't? Even though y-you have manwhore brothers that, while manwhores, weren't wrong in telling you that you don't toy with other people's feelings because it's a shit thing to do? W-Were you so stupid and cocky that yo-you thought you could keep that up? Did you drop out of school w-with no real plan and, when you got the rug pulled out from under you by our parents, did you tell your older brother who was trying to help you to 'fuck off'?"

Jill stared as Tony shivered, "D-Did you get caught doing wrong and almost get him into a fight he had no business with besides your relation? D-Did you not even thank him for protecting you e-even though he was right you were a spoiled piece of shit that should have faced it on your own? D-Did you—did you not ev-even go to see him off for the last time our family would see him alive?!"

… "D-Did you start to realize y-you are a piece of shit and he was right a-and couldn't even manage to talk to him on the phone when he called because you were so ashamed? Did yo-you not even say anything when he got shot and almost died the first time?! Did you go almost a full year and a half without having a civil conversation?! Did you just fuck up entirely?!"

Tony's face washed with tears, his lip shuddering, "Oh God, Jill, it's too late. It's too late, why? I can't do anything to make it right now, I'm-I'm such an idiot- why?"

Shaking her head, she embraced him tightly as he sobbed into her shoulder. Ah. Koji…Mr. Perceptive. With a violent streak a mile long, she…would say he'd make a fine 'oldest'. He…he knew they needed to drop those walls sometimes. They all…had their reasons.

There…was gray there.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"…Do you think he hated me?"

Jill sat in her car for a while, staring at the Yagami Mansion where she'd lived for as long as she could remember. Tony asked that last week after the fight before he went off to school. While she thought he was fully deserving of a mental break, he advised he had to stop being a failure, waited for his face to calm, and went to school. Before he left though, he asked that. "Do you think he hated me?"

No. Yagami Shin did not hate his little brother. He wanted Tony to do better and to fully grasp his potential. He was probably exasperated with him, certainly, but Shin was only frustrated because he knew Tony's capabilities. He did, in fact, love his little brother.

"I just…I just want a second chance" Tony had mumbled, "…I wish I had the faith that Koji, mama, and Shaun have but…but what makes us deserve to get Shin back?"

…It was almost September. Shin had been gone for over sixty days. While, as she hoped, her bullying at school had completely evaporated, replaced with fake nuances and overly friendly individuals that once spread false information like wildfire, hope had its limits. A second chance…was something that she could only write in a story now.

Sighing, she finally got out of her car, heading for the front door. She fiddled with her keychain, finding the only other key aside from her car key and the fuzzy pink ornament to open the house. Turning the knob, she was about to echo that she was home…but was startled to find Koji Yagami sitting at the end of the steps.

"Koji?" she frowned, shutting the door behind her.

Her older brother had his eyes shut, reclined on the stairs. There was the scent of food in the background and what sounded like her mother…humming? It sounded so…cheerful. What? Where did they get this positive energy?! However, her heart grew heavy when Koji opened his eyes and they were…somewhat bleary. "…Nii-san?"

Koji stood and suddenly enveloped her in his arms. What? Confused, she rubbed his back. What? Was…was he okay? "Koji?"

"…It's okay now."

…Huh? He smiled some, tilting his head, "C'mon."

Jill followed, confused. What was going on? As they crossed through the kitchen, their mama looked back from the stove and scowled. It…looked like she was making skipjack sashimi. Shin…loved skipjack. "Don't wake him."

"Of course not" Koji assured.

Wake who? Dad? Koji walked into the living room and she followed, about to question what was going on. It was a pretty big deal if dad came home, but…

Jill stared at the couch. It was a tall person, their body covered by the grey throw that usually adorned their couch, their mouth lightly agape as they lied cheek down on the couch. Their skin was bronze and very damaged in spots, whoever's hair long and dry, one half brown and the top and roots a strange blond color. Their face was…very gaunt. Who was this sleeping on their couch?!

…'It's okay now'?

Her mind…was not registering. What…what was okay now? Who was…? She stared hard. If…she rebuilt in her mind, if…if she was crazy enough to embrace, it…sort of looked like…

"It's Shin, Jill."

"…What?"

"It's Shin. It's a long story he can tell when he wakes up but he got back to us. It's okay now" Koji murmured once more.

Ludicrous. Turning to declare he was insane and that they just couldn't find some random person to replace their brother, she paused. Koji looked…so relieved and at peace. This…this just…

"…Nii-san" she whimpered, "…A-Are you…? Are you…sure?"

"Nn. I talked to him before he went to sleep, Jill, it's him. It's Shin. He made it back to us. It's okay."

How? Covering her mouth, she trembled before turning back to him. With eyes that weren't jaded with pragmatics and disbelief, upon second look, he looked to be the perfect height. The brown, while damaged, was Shin's hair color. He had Shin's nose. His lips were cracked beyond belief but…but it…

"Oh my God. Oh my God" she sobbed, collapsing.

Koji stroked her hair as she couldn't even…manage to acknowledge that what she deemed a dead man was now snoring peacefully on their couch. How?! How on Earth did he get out of the water? Where had he been?! How in any universe did they get this lucky?!

"Tony!" she proclaimed, overwhelmed as she jumped to her feet. "I—I have to call Tony, he has to know."

He had to know that they—"Hold your horses there, girly."

What? Why hadn't he called them anyway?! Why was their mom just cooking!? She should have run out of the house to go get their dad! Papa! She had to go get papa! Koji held up his hands, a little wide-eyed, "Woah there, sister, you're getting a little frantic. Listen: I don't like it at all. Like, at all. But, Shin cannot have us announcing this to anyone. Not Nell, not Tony, not Shaun, not even Pop. We have to keep him a ghost to the world at large."

Oh, so she was dreaming. Miserable, she started to pinch herself to wake. Ridiculous. Koji leered, "Stop that. Look, he will tell the details and I am going to try to get everyone home incognito. I've already sent Nelly a series of heckling texts about how much of a punk he is for not coming home for three months and that he's a bad son."

"Koji!" Jill gawked.

"To get him here to make him feel better! We cannot communicate over any lines that Shin is here nor that he's alive. He's…still on a mission."

…Even now?! He looked awful, he couldn't complete any mission!

…Who was she to say that? He…he had managed to get out of whatever disaster he was alive when she hadn't…hadn't had a speck of hope for him.

Shaking, she swallowed hard and nodded. "…I don't get it b-but, if Shin said so, I will agree. I-It sounds terrible."

"That it is" Koji agreed, kissing her forehead, "…But we got our second chance now, Jill."

Her heart skipped a beat as he walked away to the kitchen, speaking with mama. A…a second chance.

They now…had opportunities to keep…making new memories now. They had the chance to…to apologize for all their indiscretions. They had time to rewrite some of them. Her brother wasn't now a bloated corpse but, once again, a character in the narrative of life. It…it hadn't been beyond life to be positive this once nor black and white.

The…the chapters could continue. They were all together again.

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End Notes:

Man, I did not realize how much Simple Plan I listened to in this written year of 2002, jeez. Jill is listening to 'I'm Just a Kid' and when Tony asks to turn off the radio, they're listening to 'Perfect' by the aforementioned band.

Daisy and Nannette are based off characters from the Gameboy Color series. Typically, or, when we first meet Jill in the first version of Step Toward the Future, she is written as this sullen type without friends but, well, I see all of the kids just not having many now rather than none. Surprisingly, Koji, the most sullen of them all, has the most friends.

Dean is the straight up rip-off of Owen and several other Bokumono characters that Natsume created but, well, I do need throw away characters especially since it looks like Marvelous seems to be geared toward doing remakes…

Ann is based off Ann from SNES/Magical Melody, just to reiterate. Her real name is Annaliese as Ann from HM64/BTN/FOMT/MFOMT is present as a bit of an antagonist in Step Toward the Future. No promises but I may slightly rectify her there. I'm still not a fan but I'm tired of my super villainous SIDE CHARACTERS. Like, damn it, Yaya!

I may occasionally come and update this one if I feel like writing Sogen Ops stuff. FYI, if you're a veteran to the series somehow, when Shin generally shows up to thwart a situation, it can be somewhat implied that his crew is with them. His steady sniper is definitely Komari.

I ended with Jill because now, I can get back to my Step Toward the Future remaster which, because of THIS story, I have to fine tune again. I would say I want to do Shaun and Tony's story just in case that happens again but Shaun's story is set during parts of STtF and Tony's is kind of right after…see you soon.

~Always, Dark Ryuu