13.
TEMPORE MUTATIONEM
Wanda found Hermione outside, sitting with her back to the wall of one of the greenhouses, in a hidden corner. The young girl followed the sound of sniffles as she was coming up to the Owlery in the afternoon. When she spotted Hermione, at first she thought her friend was crying for the reasons she'd heard Theo and Draco fight the other day, but then she saw Hermione was reading a letter.
"Hermione, what's wrong?" Wanda asked her with concern in her eyes as she approached.
Hermione was startled to have been found in such a state. She wiped her tears away and folded back the letter. Wanda sat beside her in silence for a long time until Hermione had calmed down.
"Does your head hurt too, when you cry?" the girl asked.
Hermione exhaled through her nose as she smiled slightly before nodding. She didn't trust that her voice wouldn't break if she tried to speak. Wanda looked at her and it felt as though the girl was seeing through her.
"It's okay if you don't want to talk yet," Wanda said in a soft voice. "We can stay here for a while."
And that's what they did. From their spot, they could see the top of the Owlery, where several owls rested midway through a delivery, flew around and picked at the treat dispensers, trying to earn more than they were enchanted to give.
When the light started dwindling as the sun set in the sky, Hermione glanced at her side. Wanda was sitting with her legs crossed, her back straight and her eyes closed. The girl exhaled and smiled contentedly.
"Meditation is good for you," she murmured. "You should try it. Helps with anxiety."
She opened her eyes and fixed them on Hermione. This girl had an air to her which always fascinated Hermione. She seemed like an old soul trapped in an eleven-year-old body. She was quiet in that deep way where whenever she said something, it was always worth listening to. While Hermione would yap endlessly, Wanda could listen forever.
"My parents' house was sold today," Hermione said finally. "It was the last thing I had left of them, but…It didn't feel right coming back."
"Oh, I didn't know they were—"
"They're not," Hermione rushed to say. She didn't even want to think of it that way. "During the war, I thought they'd be in danger, so I Obliv—I—" She sighed in defeat. "I Obliviated them."
"Oh, no," Wanda whispered. She took one of Hermione's hands in both of hers. "Did it go wrong…?"
Hermione laughed bitterly. "It went too well," she said. "They're somewhere in Australia and they don't even know I exist."
"I'm sorry," Wanda said earnestly.
"Thank you."
Wanda let go of Hermione's hand and hugged her. Hermione leaned her head on the girl's shoulder, grateful to have someone willing to listen without judgement. She'd been missing Ginny all week. Earlier that day she had gone up to the Owlery to send her a letter explaining what had happened with Draco when the bad news had landed on her head, literally.
"How have you been sleeping?" Wanda asked curiously and Hermione frowned.
"Why do you ask?"
"Oh well, Draco has been giving the other guys a hard time since you broke up," Wanda said feebly. "I thought maybe you were having trouble sleeping, as well."
Hermione took a deep breath. She didn't want to know how bad of a time Draco was having, how he was as miserable as her, how his dark circles had reappeared along with his bad mood. She already saw it every day and it irritated her because she was feeling the same way.
"We didn't break up," Hermione said. "We weren't a couple, to begin with."
"Neither of you believe that, do you?"
"I don't know anymore." Hermione couldn't decide whether Wanda talking to her like she'd had experience in love and heartbreak offended her or impressed her.
"Have you ever heard your voice in a recording and felt like it wasn't yours?" Wanda asked and Hermione nodded. She remembered her father filming her as a kid with her mother at the beach or around the yard, telling them to say hello. "It will always sound different to others than it does in our own head. I think it all works like that. Everything is always different in our head."
Hermione looked at her startled. "Are you sure you're only eleven?"
Wanda chortled. "I read a lot," she said shrugging. "Honestly, I don't know how I ended up in Slytherin, especially having grown up with muggle parents…"
"You know, my best friend was also brought up by Muggles," Hermione said. "He was nearly sorted into Slytherin and he would have been just as brilliant if he had."
"Do you really think Harry Potter would have saved the wizarding world without the people he met by being in Gryffindor?" Wanda asked with a glint in her eye. "Draco always says he never achieved anything without help, especially from you."
Hermione thought about it for a moment. "I believe…Harry didn't adapt to being a Gryffindor just because he was sorted in it. A House doesn't define everything a person is, does it? Perhaps in Gryffindor, he was able to find people with many qualities compatible to him, but he was in charge of his own life as much as anybody else, despite the obstacles."
· - ·
When Easter passed and all students had returned to Hogwarts, Hermione lamented how the dynamics in the group of friends, which had flourished in Slug Club, were now thrown. Draco missed April's dinner. She'd entertained the idea of not going, but Ginny insisted she needed her there. Hermione knew that was not the case and her friend was only trying to maintain a level of normalcy, but seeing how Draco blew his friends off didn't put her in a good mood. She thought it was her fault.
The Battle of Hogwarts anniversary fell on a Sunday. Draco didn't make an appearance, either, and some people thought it was disrespectful. Hermione resented it because whether he attended or not, she knew they wouldn't be happy. The air around the castle felt bittersweet, as they both celebrated and mourned in a memorial party dedicated to those who'd fallen during the war. All of Hermione's friends from last year were invited and she felt happy to see them, even Ron. He looked older and seemed more reserved around her, but he still engaged her in conversation when everything felt too stilted.
"I've quit Auror training," he told her when they hugged at the end of the night outside of the entrance to say goodbye. Her surprised face made him chuckle. "It wasn't for me, Hermione, we both know that. It was Harry's dream, not mine."
"I know, but…it was a good first step into the Ministry," she said and he made a face.
"Yeah, I don't fancy working there," he confessed. "I'll be managing George's shop in Hogsmeade for a while, see how it goes."
"Oh, that's good."
"Listen, I know I've been a right git about a lot of things," he continued, looking at her nervously. "But I still consider you my friend and I want you to be happy, even if it's not with me. I'm sorry I ever made you feel tied down."
"Don't say that," she admonished, brushing her hands down his arms. "It's neither of our faults that our paths diverged."
"I know, but I could have made the transition better instead of just giving up."
"And I shouldn't have cut the connection altogether." She'd always regretted how she left for Hogwarts and avoided communicating with him out of fear.
He hugged her again and she melted into him. Despite not having any romantic feelings for him anymore, it comforted her how easy and uncomplicated it could be with him. Growing up, his childish antics irritated her, but now she craved a piece of that innocence back.
When she walked back into the castle, Theo was exiting the Great Hall where the memorial was held with Minister Kingsley Shacklebolt, Harry and two other Aurors. Hermione saw them shaking hands. Kingsley nodded at her with a smile as he passed her at the door and she approached Theo and Harry at the bottom of the stairs. Theo had been quite distant the last few weeks following Hermione's fight with Draco, and not only with her, but with his friend as well.
"Nice speech, Potter," Theo was saying. "Congrats on the guest teacher spot."
"Thanks," Harry said smiling. "I'm excited."
Since learning about how the Dumbledore's Army meetings were being held in the Room of Requirement, the Headmistress had offered Harry a guest spot next year in Defense Against the Dark Arts class teaching seventh-year students to practice advanced spells, including the Patronus charm.
Earlier in the night, he'd also made a speech about staying united despite the differences and embracing those who desired to join the part of society who didn't judge others by the provenience of their magic or blood. He said that harassing people for mistakes made in the past instead of congratulating their good actions in the present didn't make them any better humans, following McGonagall's sentiment from her speech the day Draco was attacked. It brought tears to Hermione's eyes to think he was somewhere in the dungeons thinking that if he showed his face anywhere near this celebration, people would think less of him. She was grateful to hear the sincerity in Harry's words, which helped convey the message even more.
Theo and Harry spotted Hermione and the latter smiled at her as she greeted them.
"You look very happy," she told Harry, who grinned even bigger.
"I am," he said. "Everything's falling into place, finally."
She smiled but frowned. "Everything?"
She saw him looking back at the entrance of the Great Hall, where Ginny was saying goodbye to Neville, who was holding hands with Hannah Abbott.
"I have a good career ahead of me, I'm in the process of renovating my own house and that beautiful girl is going to be my wife one day," he muttered proudly. "I just know it."
"Woah, Potter," Theo said. "Make us all jealous, why don't you."
Hermione looked at him and their eyes connected. They hadn't talked in a long time and she found that she missed him.
Harry laughed. "I'm lucky, what can I say?" He looked at Hermione and his expression sobered. "You okay?"
He'd asked her the same question ten times that night and every single time, she said yes even though she wasn't. Maybe he had decided to keep asking until she meant it. She'd told Harry and Ginny about her parents' house and about what happened with Draco. She was relieved when they showed her support without bashing him. While they both agreed that he would come around, Hermione wasn't convinced. "The way he acts with you," Ginny had said, "I don't doubt he has feelings for you. And despite what he says about protecting you by not being together publicly, he's going to regret that, just give it time."
Ginny walked up to them with a smile and Harry wrapped an arm around her waist.
"You're almost done with school," he said. "Are you sad?"
"Sad? Are you mental?" Ginny said chuckling. "I can't wait!"
"What about you, Hermione?"
She felt sad to lose this part of herself, but she wasn't ready to admit it. "I'm excited for what's next," she said instead, trying to sound convincing.
"Sure. Well, I'm leaving for the night, but I'll be back tomorrow," he said and pointed his thumb towards Theo. "I'm not missing what he came up with to restore the Room of Hidden Things."
"They're doing it tomorrow?" Hermione asked. She knew there had been developments with Theo's theory, but she had no idea they were ready to try it so soon.
"Yeah, come over at nine," Harry said. "Kingsley is bringing a few people from the Department of Mysteries. They did some trials and they said it worked, it's brilliant."
Hermione looked at Theo and he seemed to be blushing. When Harry and Ginny walked away, Hermione stood there watching him sigh and wriggle his hands awkwardly. He seemed uncharacteristically nervous.
"So you're not talking to me anymore?" Hermione asked accusingly.
He raised his head in surprise. "I thought…that you were angry with me," he said.
"What?" she asked in astonishment. "Why would you think that?"
"I don't know," he said with a sigh. "After you and Draco fought, he said to leave you alone, so I gave you some space, but then I also fought with him and he stopped talking to me, then you stopped talking to me—"
She hugged him around the middle. "I'm sorry," she said into his chest. "I didn't mean for that to happen. I wasn't sure…"
He sighed in relief and squeezed her closer. "It's okay. I just want us to be friends again."
"So what did you fight about?" she asked when they pulled apart and he sighed once more.
"I told him he was an idiot for letting you go," he said and she closed her eyes imagining how that would have set Draco off. "He misses you, Hermione. He dreams about you and talks in his sleep, calling for you…"
She hung her head and stepped back. It sounded dramatic, but she had to admit to herself how much she also missed Draco. She saw the last of the guests filing out the door, while Filch grunted at them to clear out in five minutes.
"Listen, because if he won't say it, then I will," Theo said fiercely. "He loves you. And I'm pretty sure you love him back. And…he has issues, that's for sure, but you both deserve a chance. You're my friends and I hate to see you suffering right now."
Hermione was left speechless, not knowing how to answer. She thought she'd experienced love before, but it had never felt like this. It had never felt exhilarating and suffocating at the same time. It had been simple and effortless, but it had fizzled out just as quickly as it had come. Not this time. Whenever she saw Draco the previous few weeks, her stomach churned and her chest constricted with anxiety. She worried about him and she missed the smirks and smug smiles he directed at her while they revised subjects together and he was quick to point out the right answers. She missed the stimulating conversations they had and she missed his voice as he read a book aloud while she sat on his lap. She missed his arms around her, telling her to breathe and that she was safe whenever she felt a panic attack coming on. She missed his sweet, but hungry and passionate kisses.
Theo took her hand as her chin started trembling and tears threatened to spill out. "Tell me that it's not all lost," he said.
· - ·
The next morning, Hermione skipped class for the first time in her life to join Harry and Theo on the seventh floor, ready to witness the full recovery of the Room of Hidden Things. A team of five wizards and six witches came in following the Minister and Professor McGonagall. She gave the three young friends a questioning look, but she didn't comment on their presence. Soon after, a tall figure appeared from the other side of the corridor.
"Mr Malfoy," McGonagall said after spotting him right away. "Shouldn't you be in class?"
Draco looked nervous. He glanced behind the Headmistress to Theo and Harry, avoiding Hermione's eyes.
"We discussed destroying the Vanishing Cabinet," McGonagall told Kingsley, who nodded.
"I'd like to see for myself," Draco said.
"Very well," McGonagall conceded softly. "Shall we?"
Harry led the group and the familiar big metal door appeared in front of them. He pushed to open it and everyone saw how it had been left, in ashes but with no Ashwinders. It seemed that the day McGonagall had first visited the room, she'd got rid of all the remaining ice.
The Ministry officials set out to work quickly and everybody else looked on in fascination. They used a spell Hermione had never heard of before and she knew it had been Theo's invention. Hermione walked around with Harry as piles and piles of furniture, artefacts, books and anything else imaginable were brought back from the mountains of ashes.
"Tempore Mutationem," she heard one of the officials mutter as he made a complicated movement with his wand. So that was it, a spell which turned the ashes back to its original form.
Hermione was barely aware of Theo and Draco walking behind them, talking quietly. She hoped they were finally making peace.
"There it is, Draco," Theo said loudly. Ahead of them, sat the Vanishing Cabinet that connected Hogwarts with Borgin and Burkes. "Professor, can he do the honours?"
McGonagall voiced her consent and Draco walked passed Hermione and Harry, sending a strong charm nonverbally and without preamble, destroying the tall cupboard at once with a resounding noise. Deep cracks appeared all over the surface before it fell in pieces.
Hermione saw Draco's shoulders shag considerably and he hung his head. Professor McGonagall approached him and put her arm around his back, patting his upper arm. She told him something inaudible to the rest and he nodded.
Hermione felt Harry's hand around hers and he asked, "Okay?"
"Yes," she responded.
"This is pretty incredible, huh?" he said with a smile. He didn't specify what "this" meant. He could be referring to all the things being returned to the room or the fact that Draco seemed to have chosen this moment to symbolically get rid of his past demons.
"Why, thank you, Potter." Theo moved beside them with a mischievous smile. "I'll gladly accept your tip if you know what I mean…"
"Theo!" Hermione exclaimed slapping him in the arm. It never ceased to amaze her how brazen he could be. Her friend chuckled, but she could have sworn Harry's cheeks turned a bit pink.
Kingsley, who had walked ahead to supervise the Ministry workers, caught back up to them. "Minerva, let's go have some tea. They'll come up to your office when they've finished," he said with a booming voice and an expression of satisfaction. "It's a big room."
McGonagall nodded as she let go of Draco and they walked back. As the Minister passed by Theo, he extended out his hand for him to shake.
"Excellent job, Mr Nott," he said. "Come down to the Headmistress' office in an hour and we will be discussing compensation."
"Thank you, Sir."
"I also have a proper job offer if you're still interested."
"Of course, Sir."
When McGonagall and Kingsley exited the room, they left Harry, Hermione, Theo and Draco in somewhat of an awkward position. The Slytherins seemed to have made-up overnight and Theo was friendly with all of them now, but as for the rest, she couldn't tell.
"Oh, something was overlooked there." Theo spotted a small section a few metres away to their left where a skinny and tall pile of ashes could be seen next to a set of chairs. He walked over there as the other three looked around to see if something else was missing.
"Tempore Mutationem," Theo cast and the ashes turned into something Hermione recognised: a giant chess piece, the king.
"Oh, fuck, no way!" Harry said behind her.
"I know, right—" she said as she turned towards him, but realised he was looking at something else. An old, tattered book rested innocently on a small table amongst many other things.
"It's still here." He slowly approached the table and grabbed the book, weighing it in his hands.
"Harry, no," she said desperately. "Please."
He looked at her, but his face told her he was deep in thought. "Oi, Malfoy!"
She gasped, alarmed. "What are you doing?"
Draco appeared around the corner looking suspicious. Theo stood next to Hermione, watching.
"Just wanted to say," Harry began a bit nervously. "Seeing what you did today and I guess what you've done all year, helping fix this room and whatnot, maybe I've given you a harder time than I should."
Draco looked at him in confusion but didn't say anything. Hermione looked on, intrigued as to where this was going, but also kind of terrified.
"I think this should belong to you," Harry said, offering Draco the book.
"Thanks, but I already have a Potions textbook," Draco said, eyeing the deplorable state of the cover. "And in much better condition."
"It's not just any textbook," Harry said. "Take it."
Draco frowned at his insistence and took the book, opening it. "This Book is the Property of the Half-Blood Prince," he read. "Who's that?"
"Harry, stop," Hermione said, stepping in between them and reaching for the book, but Draco moved it away. "Don't take it, Draco, please."
"What is it?" Draco asked even more intrigued now that Hermione didn't want him to have it.
"Let's go have a chat, just you and I," Harry said to him. When Hermione made a disturbed sound, he addressed her. "Calm down, there's horrifying stuff I will point out not to use, but there are also very valuable notes. I'm just trying to make peace with him, trust me."
Trust. What a double-edged sword, she thought. She sighed in defeat, knowing she'd be worrying while they talked, but in the end, there was nothing else she could do.
"All right," she said, glancing at Draco, who was skimming through the pages, and back to Harry. "I have Charms class next. I'll see you later."
· - ·
Hermione didn't see Draco during lunch and Ginny told her Harry had left with the Minister not too long before then. She wanted to go find him, to make sure he understood how dangerous that book could be, but she had to trust that Harry had already conveyed it.
Three days later, she was studying at the library in the morning, sitting in her usual spot, when someone sat in front of her. She barely noticed them until she heard a throat clear. It startled her because at that hour, most students were in class and she could put all her concentration in the books and parchments in front of her. She looked up to see Draco's grey eyes fixed on her. He was clutching the Half-Blood Prince book on the table. She took a sharp breath.
"Why didn't you want me to have it?" he asked. His face was expressionless. It was the first time he'd said anything to her since they fought.
"I would hope that Harry explained—"
"Potter told me everything," he said. "But I need to know why you thought I shouldn't have this book."
He watched her patiently. He didn't sound angry or accusatory, only curious. She sat back on her seat trying to find the right words.
"That book almost got you killed," she explained. "Twice."
He nodded for her to keep going.
"I don't know what other harmful, crazy spells and curses there could be in it, but I worried so much for Harry when he had it, and I—" she felt a lump crawling up her throat as she spoke. "I guess I don't want you to be in danger."
After a long moment, Draco seemed satisfied with her answer. He stood up and started walking away before he turned back around.
"It has a detailed and modified version of Felix Felicis that should make the brewing process much easier," he said. "There's also a better version of the Draught of Living Dead potion which helps brew it faster, and several other altered formulas. That's what I'll use the book for, Granger, so don't worry."
He gave his back to her again when she called, "Draco!" and he stopped. "Don't let Madam Pince see it. She'll go nuts with how ragged it looks," she said.
· - ·
With N.E.W.T.s fast approaching, Hermione focused all her energy on studying. The only event she attended outside of her routine was the last game of the school's Quidditch season, Gryffindor versus Ravenclaw, at the end of May. It seemed like Gryffindor would take the House Cup after all, thanks to the team's effort at earning quite a lot of points while also giving a beautiful show. Hermione was amazed at how quickly nearly three hours had passed without her realising.
In the same way, June finally arrived and McGonagall handed over their N.E.W.T.s schedule, which would expand for two weeks. Hermione was in a constant state of anxiety before, during and after her exams, appearing frazzled and barely eating. Even Professor Gournie stopped her once to ask how she was doing. The woman invited her for tea once she'd finished her exams, just a week before the school year ended.
"I heard your examinations went very well," Gournie commented with a smile as they sat down in her office while a kettle poured hot tea in two beautifully decorated cups.
Hermione had been able to relax for a few days by then, knowing she'd done her absolute best and felt very satisfied and proud of herself.
"I'm confident that I'll be able to achieve great results," Hermione said, blushing slightly. "I've worked hard for it."
"I'm sure you did, my dear," Gournie said. "Now you can enjoy a bit of freedom, yes?"
Hermione nodded before taking a sip. "I'd like to travel this summer before I start my probation at St Mungo's."
She'd applied to start a three-year trial as a Healer while she did a Muggle medicine program online. But before that, she'd decided to visit Australia and try to look for her parents. Inspired by Theo, she was determined to find a way to reverse her strong memory charm safely. She knew there was still a lot to learn about magic and what witches and wizards were capable of. But first, she needed to locate Wendell and Monica Wilkins before they could go back to being Richard and Jean Granger, her parents.
"That sounds wonderful," Gournie said softly. "Of course, I'd like to keep our contact, if you agree, especially if we want to finish our project."
They'd decided that Hermione would put all of her notes about Gournie's life in order and they would flesh them out into a manuscript to be published. Thanks to the Professor's contacts along with Slughorn's, they'd surely be able to turn their project into a reality.
"Yes, Professor, absolutely!"
"Then you can start calling me Marie, then."
"I'll try," Hermione said chuckling.
"Now, has a certain blond Slytherin made any progress, lately?"
Professor Gournie, Marie, had turned into Hermione's confidante of sorts. As much as the woman enjoyed talking about herself, she was also a romantic and became interested in helping Hermione in regards to her secret love life.
"He held a door for me the other day before our written Potions exam," Hermione recalled. "That's about it."
"Hmm," Gournie grunted. "I might have to kick that boy into gear myself."
"Please, don't say anything to him," Hermione said shaking her head. "Draco needs to take the step on his own."
"But you're still open to it, aren't you?" Gournie asked. "The school year is about to end, after all."
"Yes, I am."
"Excellent," the Professor said. "Then maybe you could, you know, take the horn into your own hands, or whatever muggles say."
Hermione snorted, nearly spitting out her tea. Professor Gournie had started reading a few harlequin novels a friend from America had sent her, but there were more than a few muggle expressions that she didn't understand. No matter how wrong she did it, she still tried to incorporate them in her speech. Hermione suspected she did it humorously for her sake.
"You're a powerful witch, Hermione, in every sense of the word," she said disregarding the girl's reaction. "You should go for what you want, let him know it's time to man up because that boy is clearly still very smitten from what you've told me. He's just scared."
Since Hermione learned about him having dreams about her and after their last conversation where she'd basically confessed how she still cared about him, she didn't know what to make of Draco's new attitude. He'd started getting closer again, doing little things for her, like opening doors, fetching ingredients for her during Potions class, sharing tools in Herbology and even sat with her and her friends during lunch one day when Theo dragged Draco and Blaise with him. He did these things in front of everyone, so people had started noticing, but those gestures still seemed minuscule to Hermione. Despite that, she didn't dare demand more from him again. According to Gournie, though, she should.
· - ·
The last Monday of June, the castle was practically empty, as most of the students were taking advantage of the fact that exams were over and they finally had free time to walk outside and bask in the sun before they had to return home in a few days. Another memorial would be held at the school on June 30th in honour of Professor Dumbledore, this time without guests or parties. A day after that, the Hogwarts Express would bring Hermione and the rest of her last year peers back to London for the last time as students.
Coming back from their walk around the lake, Hermione, Theo and Ginny spotted a familiar blonde head of hair, long and clipped halfway up. Narcissa Malfoy was led by Hagrid up to the castle entrance from the Thestral carriage at the start of the path.
"Oh, boy," Theo said.
"What is she doing here?" Ginny asked, echoing Hermione's thoughts.
"Draco said he requested a last meeting with McGonagall," Theo explained. "But I don't think he expected his mummy to join in."
Once Mrs Malfoy was inside, Filch greeted her before leading her towards the Headmistress' office. Hagrid hung back outside chatting with Hermione and her friends. They asked what Narcissa Malfoy was doing at Hogwarts and he could only tell them what they already knew. She was meeting McGonagall and nobody knew why.
"After her boy came to apologise in his and his father's name, I would expect anything these days," Hagrid said nonchalantly.
"He did what?" Hermione asked.
"Yeah! He came by the other day and I almost closed the door on his pointy face when I saw him, but he said he was sorry he ever tried to get me sacked, somethin' or other…"
"When Potter gave Draco that book and talked to him…it did something to him," Theo muttered.
Hermione exchanged a look with Ginny and the redhead was smiling. If Draco was putting some effort into making things right with the people he had wronged, what was taking so long for him to do something about her? Maybe she'd have to grab the bull by the horns, just like Gournie had tried to say. There were three more days left in the school year and after that, she wasn't sure when or if she'd see him again if neither of them did nothing about it.
· - ·
A/N. AurorEowyn & Girl of Chaos are the best betas!