Freedom's Just Another Word

by snarcasm318

A/U: College is supposed to be their first taste of freedom, but for the last year Gail Peck had real freedom. Now she's back, within the grasp of her controlling parents, and forced to face the nightmares she's tried to leave behind. She's used to dealing with it alone, but does she have to?

24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

A/N: Hey ya'll I know it's been a long ass time and I'm sorry for the wait. I didn't mean to leave you (and Gail) in a lurch for so long. Thank you so much for the amazing reviews you have no idea how much they mean to me. And thank you all for sticking with this story, following it, and favoriting it. Let's see what happens next to our favorite couples...

---

Holly stumbled to the door of the dimly lit apartment, glasses tossed on crookedly, and a sweater thrown over her t-shirt to stave off the cold air she battled after leaving the nice cocoon of her warm bed. It was past 5am and she had only been asleep for a couple of hours. She opened the door and squinted against the bright light of the hallway.

"Hey," her voice was hoarse from sleep. She stepped aside to let her visitor in before closing the door and locking it behind her. "What's up?"

Gail moved forward to press her lips against Holly's like she had so many times before. Have a nightmare, go see Holly. It was a simple solution. She had done it time and again without the brunette knowing what was going on with her. But it was nothing more than a temporary fix, a distraction. A very good distraction, but a distraction all the same.

Holly was the one to slow the kiss down and to gently pull away. When the kiss broke Gail let out a sigh as she rested her forehead against Holly's. Her eyes were shut tightly as she tried to keep the rest of the world at bay a little longer.

Holly opened her eyes and tried to search the other woman's face for any indication of what was going on with her, but she needed to see the blue eyes for that, and they were still being hidden behind tightly sealed eyelids. Her heart was pounding in her chest just from the few moments of having the blonde's lips pressed against her's, but there was also a pit growing in her stomach. She had thought they were moving past this middle of the night bootycall relationship they had going on, but this moment felt just like before. The silence, the desperation to feel one another, the easy falling into sync as their bodies naturally reacted to one another. It was easy to give in to the magnetic pull of the other woman still clutching her arms, holding her close, but Holly couldn't keep doing this without falling faster than she already was, and the ground was starting to get dangerously close. Her hands, which had found purchase on Gail's sharp hips, gave a gentle squeeze to draw the other girl's attention.

"Gail, we agreed..."

Gail finally opened her eyes and moved back just enough to be able to see Holly's face without going cross-eyed. Unfortunately for her, the worry in the brown eyes locked on her was painfully apparent. "I know, I just couldn't help myself, sorry."

Holly sighed and tried to muster a small smile, the corner of her lips pulling up ever so slightly. "Don't be sorry for kissing me."

"I'm not. But I shouldn't have shown up here and done that. That's not why I came here."

Holly started to trace reassuring circles along the blonde's hips. "Ok, so why did you come here?"

Gail pulled away sharply and Holly could do little more than just watch helplessly as the blonde started pacing. The more she tried to think of how to explain it all to Holly the more her breathing rate picked up. She was pretty sure she was sweating and suddenly the world seemed to be moving faster and her head felt a bit lighter.

"Hey, Gail, stop for a minute." The blonde froze. "Look at me." Her eyes flicked up towards Holly's face. "Good."

Once she had the other girl's attention, Holly didn't say anything else. She moved closer, but kept enough distance that Gail wouldn't feel overwhelmed. She reached out gently, her hand wrapping around a petite wrist until her fingers applied slight pressure to the place she knew she could feel the racing pulse that was trying to slow. She waited and watched until Gail's breathing naturally started to mimic hers.

"What are we doing?" Gail asked once she felt like she could get air back into her lungs.

"Breathing," Holly replied simply.

"Why?"

"You looked like you needed to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide at a more normal rate." Holly smiled when Gail rolled her eyes, satisfied that she looked less likely to pass out. "Couldn't sleep?"

Gail's eyes dropped to the floor as she shook her head.

Holly tilted the blonde's chin up ever so slightly to get her to look at her again. She smiled softly once the blue eyes were on her. "So what do you want to do?"

"Do you want to go on date number three?" The words came rushing out in a single breath.

Holly smiled wider and nodded despite her confusion. "Sure, but you didn't need to come here to ask me that."

"I mean right now."

"At 5 o'clock in the morning?"

"Yeah."

"Umm sure? What did you have in mind?"

"Anything."

"So I see you planned this one out." Gail looked anxious again and Holly kind of regretted making the joke. "I was just kidding."

Gail ran a hand over her short hair causing it to spike. "Yeah, yeah I know. But you must think I'm insane just showing up and asking you out, but I wanted to see you."

"I'm always happy to see you. Plus, I already think you're insane, Danger." Holly winked for added emphasis. She felt her heart swell a little at the small smile on the freshman's face that she had managed to elicit. It didn't matter that it was at the ass crack of dawn, Holly would do anything to see that smile widen. "You know what? I have an idea. Wait here."

Holly navigated Gail onto a stool in her kitchen. She could feel the blue eyes watching her as she started to boil some hot water but the other girl said nothing, not even to ask what the idea was. She went to her room and grabbed some blankets before dumping the water, some chocolate mix, and marshmallows into two thermoses. She handed one to the still perched freshman before tucking the blankets securely under her arm. They were ready to go.

"Come on," Holly reached for a hand to tug the blonde behind her but Gail pulled back with a hiss at the contact.

The med student immediately noticed the way the other girl pulled her arm in tightly to her body. It was the same hand that had been injured when she had shown up to the Emergency Department. "Did something happen?"

"The bed frame and I may have gotten into a disagreement." Gail explained through clenched teeth before she took a deep breath and stretched her hand slowly.

"That could only be solved with your fist?"

Gail shrugged and focused her eyes on everything in the apartment but the brunette standing in front of her.

Holly sighed to herself and shook her head slightly as she placed the items she had been holding onto the kitchen counter. "Can I take a look?"

She waited for the blonde to give her a curt nod before taking the injured appendage delicately into her hand. She ghosted her fingers along the darkening knuckles; Gail's pale skin was already starting to bruise. She flexed and extended each joint and palpated it for swelling. "I don't think it's broken." Despite the sound of disbelief that came from the injured party, Holly was fairly certain Gail wouldn't need to go to the hospital again. When she finished her exam, Holly lifted Gail's hand to her lips and brushed over the injury with gentle kisses.

"They're proven to heal." Holly explained when she noticed the raised eyebrow and questioning look adorning the other girl's face.

"Is that your medical opinion, Doc?" Gail teased, even though her hand did seem to hurt a little less after the kisses.

"Yep." Holly replied with a wide grin. She grabbed the blonde's good hand. "Ready?"

"I still don't know for what."

"Trust me."

Holly was pleasantly surprised when the blonde followed in her footsteps carrying her share of blankets and a warm drink. The brunette lead them to the familiar door and jiggled the lock, they reached the roof and could see that the dark sky was beginning to lighten. The sun wasn't quite ready to rise but it was starting to exert its influence.

The two girls moved the picnic table they usually studied on closer to the edge in quiet agreement. They sat next to one another, pressed closely together so that they could share the blankets as they wrapped themselves in a tight cocoon. They could barely lift their arms to take sips of the hot chocolate in attempts to fight against the cold weather. They sat like that enjoying the quiet hum of the city below them while keeping their eyes fixed along the horizon of tall buildings as the sun slowly crept high enough to light the sky in an array of reds, pinks, oranges, and yellows.

After a while, Holly felt the blonde head beside her drop to her shoulder. She smiled as she leaned her cheek against the cap that was pulled snuggly over exposed ears. She could feel Gail sigh beside her and she hoped it was a good one. "Feeling better?"

"Much." Gail said softly and reached under the blanket for Holly's hand, which she held in her good one. "How do you do it?"

"How do I do what?" Holly asked curiously.

"Make it hurt less."

It was such a heavy statement and Holly felt her heart tug at the melancholic tone the blonde used. "What hurts?"

There was a long pause before Gail quietly responded. "Everything."

"Oh sweetie." Holly pulled the other girl even closer and she wasn't sure what to expect but Gail seemed to sink further into the embrace. The blonde didn't cry or if she did it was the silent type of crying that Holly couldn't distinguish. Eventually she did start to talk. She told Holly about leaving the lab and what happened with Oliver. She spoke about her suspicions about her family and that she would have to see them the following weekend. She even talked about how her friends all going to a party that night had triggered her anxiety. And for her part, Holly simply listened. She didn't interrupt or ask questions or try in any way to get Gail to share anything more than she was willing to. She sat as still as possible, trying to hold Gail close without making the blonde feel like she was trapped. But she wanted her to know that she was there for her. That she wasn't alone. That she didn't have to bear her burdens on her own. Holly couldn't do it with words so she did it with the gentle kisses she pressed to the blonde's head, with the smooth circles she traced on the back of Gail's uninjured hand, with slight murmurs of acknowledgement and long stretches of silence. She just hoped that it was enough.

When Gail finally ran out of words, the sun had risen much further into the sky illuminating the city below them, bringing it back to life. She pulled the blankets even closer around them. "Aren't you the one always warning me about hypothermia?"

"Are you ready to head down?"

"Yeah, we should go while I can still feel my toes."

The two girls stood up and gathered their belongings. As Holly went to head to the door, she was stopped by a hand on her wrist. She turned back and Gail shuffled closer to her.

"Thank you, for this. For bringing me here and letting me talk."

"Anytime." And Holly meant it with every fiber of her being. She looked into those stormy blue eyes and felt her heart skip a beat. She moved closer and brought her free hand up to the back of the blonde head, her fingers slipping between short strands peeking out beneath the knitted cap, and gently pulled Gail into a kiss. It was a slow kiss, not like the pressured one Gail had initiated before. It was the type of kiss that made the rest of the world fall away for just a moment.

Despite the cold seeping into their bones neither girl wanted to end it, but eventually they had to. When Holly pulled back she was greeted by a dazzling smile on the other girl's face.

"I told you date number three would be magical," Gail said quietly before pulling Holly in for another kiss.

---

The rest of morning had passed quickly before Holly had to be at the lab and Gail had to head home. The two girls had gone back down to the med student's apartment but they purposefully stayed out of Holly's bedroom, both knowing that it was a little too much temptation for one morning. Instead they had settled out in the living room until Holly's roommates woke up. Gail took that as her cue to leave and Holly had walked her out. They shared another brief kiss before the blonde headed back to her house and Holly got ready for her shift at the lab.

Gail returned to a sleeping house. She still had hours to kill before her shift. It would've been the perfect opportunity to sleep but she couldn't get her restless bones to settle, so she iced her hand/wrist and got a head start on her assignments for the week while her housemates slept off their hangovers.

She meant to visit Oliver, and despite Holly's reassurances that Oliver would get out of his mood, she wasn't ready to face her friend being angry with her because of her last name. Not yet, at least. Thinking about Oliver lead her to thinking about her family, and, this time, she didn't have Holly to distract her. She found herself looking up flights that could get her as far away from Toronto and her mother as possible. It turned out to be a little too tempting of a distraction as she found her finger itching to click the button that would get her out of Sunday dinner. Luckily for her bank account her housemates woke up to offer a distraction. When it was finally time for work she had no problem clocking in and busying herself with the liveliness of the bar.

"Trace your stalker's here." Gail called out to the waitress as the boy from the coffee shop down the street came in and immediately took the same seat in Traci's section that he always did. Gail had catalogued him like she did everyone. Like she had been taught to do. Tall (at least 6 feet) white guy, light brown shaggy hair, with a shitty goatee. He was wearing blue jeans and a t-shirt under a dark flannel shirt. She could give the same basic run down of anyone in the room at anytime.

"That's not funny, Gail." Traci chastised as she dropped her tray on the bartop and rattled off a list of orders for the bartender.

"Who's joking?" Gail asked as she poured out the drinks Traci requested.

"He's not a stalker."

"He only comes in here on days you're working, he only ever sits in your section, he watches you the entire time he's here." Gail counted off the evidence on her hand. "Yeah, dude's a stalker."

Traci shook her head, "So he might have a little crush, I'm sure it's harmless." Guys hit on them all the time. It was no secret that while the Lucky Penny had always been popular amongst the college crowd, profits had increased since Traci and Gail started working there.

"I wouldn't be so sure." Gail warned.

"What makes you say that?"

Gail knew what letting your guard down could cost you. She had seen the carnage left behind in the folder her parents forced her to study. She had almost been part of the wreckage. But that was something her friends still didn't know. "Just trust me. You can never be sure."

"Well he has to know I have a boyfriend. I mean Jerry isn't exactly shy about showing off when he's here." The senior always made it a point to greet Traci with a kiss whenever he saw her. He loved to brag to people how amazing his girlfriend was. He had even been the one to put a label on them first. He had also been the one to drop the "L" word on their first official date. The entire world could see how head-over-heels Jerry was for her and the feeling was mutual.

"Doesn't mean he cares." The blonde pointed out.

Traci frowned as she glanced over at her section. The boy in question was definitely staring at her and he didn't avert his eyes when he saw her looking. It was starting to unnerve her. "Should I say something?"

"Your call." It would have to be Traci's decision at that point; he only ever interacted with her, even refusing service from anyone else who tried to take his order.

Traci bit her lip as she weighed out her options. "He's a customer. Charlie will kill me if I piss off a customer with some kind of accusation. You know how he feels about drama."

It was true that their curmudgeon of a boss had a very low tolerance for drama of any kind. It may just be a college dive bar but he expected his employees to display at least some level of professionalism. Now, there were exceptions to every rule. Gail being one of them. But it was also very obvious that he respected Traci and her ability to keep a smile on and sweet talk the customers no matter what was going on. So, she didn't want to change his opinion of her now.

"I don't know. I think Chucky would understand. We could probably tell him and he may say something."

"But he's never done anything wrong. He just comes in, sits at his table, orders his food, and makes small talk with me."

"Yet. Hasn't done anything wrong yet." Gail pointed out.

"Alright, enough, you're freaking me out."

"I'm just warning you."

"Well not everyone is as paranoid as you, Gail." Traci snapped at her friend before grabbing her tray and heading back to her customers.

Gail didn't watch as the server weaved her way through the crowd, instead she kept her attention on the boy who was openly admiring her friend. It was true that the guy hadn't done anything more than give Gail the creeps and that wasn't really hard to do. Most of humanity could get under Gail's skin but this felt different. Unfortunately, she knew feeling wasn't enough to go on. Gut instincts were never a viable answer in the Peck household. And yet, paranoia was. So she continued to watch the customer out of the corner of her eye as she worked.

Eventually her line of vision was obstructed by the arrival of the rest of the freshmen. Her rowdy friends lined her bar and Gail poured them out drinks while they waited for the others to join them for dinner. Andy and Chloe were gossiping about the people they hooked up with at the party the night before while the boys were arguing about whose turn it was to clean the Mancave. Their voices provided nothing more than a background buzzing to help Gail keep her mind off more stressful things.

When Jerry, Sammy, Juliet, and Nick came to join the rest of the ratpack the others caused a ruckus.

"Alright you losers are gonna get yourselves banned from the premises if you don't reign it in." Gail warned over her increasingly loud friends.

"Don't be a buzzkill, Ice Queen. Monday will do that enough for all of us." Dov chastised, his cheeks ruddy from the shots he had just challenged Gerald-err...Duncan to.

"You guys act like you haven't seen each other in years. It's been like twenty minutes."

"Just because no one cheers when you arrive doesn't mean you have to rain on everyone else's parade."

"Whatever, Pigeon." It was a nickname that Frankie had started and Gail knew it drove the boy mad.

Dov opened his mouth to continue the argument when Chloe cut him off, "I cheer when Gail arrives."

"You cheer when everyone arrives," Andy pointed out without taking her eyes off the approaching older students. She flipped her hair over her shoulder and tried to draw Sammy's attention, but the boy was too busy scoping out the other people at the bar.

Both Chloe and Gail rolled their eyes at the move.

"You've been living with Gail for too long," Nick pointed out as he reached over his friend's shoulder to steal her beer.

Gail didn't bother containing her evil smirk. She took pride in being able to corrupt the Disney Princess she lived with. Chloe wasn't that bad and she had definitely calmed down since they first met at the beginning of the year. But the blonde couldn't exactly admit that to the group or her roommate would become insufferable.

"If that was true, I probably would've threatened to break every bone in your body for stealing my drink," Chloe informed the boy cheerfully, the complete opposite of Gail's intimidating delivery.

The group laughed at how true the statement was. Gail didn't deny it and instead just set a new drink out for her roommate without being asked. Chloe turned her bright smile to her roommate and thanked her, but Gail waved it off. She was distracted as she watched Jerry catch Traci in a quick embrace when she crossed paths with him between tables. Her eyes quickly darted from the giddy couple to the table she knew held Traci's "admirer". But the table was empty and the boy was nowhere to be found.

As Traci and Jerry joined the others, the waitress ushered the growing group away from the bar where they were making it difficult for other customers to reach the bartender, and towards their usual tables. As the rest of the crowd migrated, Chris remained glued to his seat where he was staring at some sketchy-looking guy in the corner.

"Hey you're driving me tomorrow right?" Gail tried to confirm as she poured out the pitcher Chris was supposed to carry over to the table. The boy didn't respond until Gail punched him in the arm.

"Ow. What?" He rubbed at his arm and then the question seemed to register. "Oh, yeah, sure sure." He continued to stare into the corner.

Gail noticed that the boy was looking more pale and sweaty than normal. He seemed nervous, twitchy almost, and he was clearly distracted by something. "Where's your head at?"

"Sorry, I just see someone I know. I'll talk to you later." Chris took off in the direction of the men's room where the other guy had just entered.

Gail frowned but there was little she could do before other customers were taking the now unoccupied seats, calling for beer, and getting riled up for the football game Charlie had playing throughout the bar. If Gail didn't already hate sports, working in a crowded bar during playoffs would be enough of a reason. At least her tips were good.

---

By the time their shift ended, Gail and Traci dragged their tired bones back home in relative silence. They had both made good money that night, but Traci had been recovering from the party the night before and Gail was running on only a couple of hours of restless sleep. The bar had been loud and crowded and filled with rowdy college kids cheering on men tackling one another. Their feet hurt and their ears were ringing. They both declined hanging out at the boys' house and tripped over themselves heading upstairs to their rooms.

"Night Gail." Traci quietly murmured as she opened the door to her room. She would get to sleep later than the blonde since her classes didn't start until late morning.

"G'night." Gail mumbled as she headed into her room, peeled off her clothes, and collapsed in her bed. It was cold in the house and she barely managed to get herself under the pile of blankets she had, too tired to find real pajamas or even socks for her cold feet. She tried not to think of anything and just let the exhaustion take her away.

Just before she fell asleep her phone vibrated beside her. She opened up the message from Holly and her last thought before she finally let herself relax was of the brunette wishing her 'Sweet dreams'.

Gail didn't wake up until her alarm the next morning.

---

"The hamster's spinning a little fast today." Gail commented as she drove Chris' truck to campus. For some reason, he said he wasn't in the mood to drive and had handed his keys over to the blonde that morning. But the entire time Chris had been bouncing around in the passenger seat with his coffee. He was like a tightly wound bundle of energy.

"Mmmhmmm." He turned to face her with a goofy smile.

"Yeah, exactly, how many of those have you had?" She kept her eyes on the road but gestured with a tilt of her head.

He looked at the coffee cup in his hand, "Like two, three. I don't know. I had kind of a late night, if you know what I'm saying." The hint-hint-nudge-nudge was evident in his voice.

Gail made a face of absolute disgust, "Ewww. I forgot you've met somebody."

"Yeah, yeah. I figured I got to get back on that horse, you know. No matter how many times it bucks you off." Gail made a sound somewhere between a strangled laugh and a gag. But Chris continued just as enthusiastically, "You just got to stay on it."

"Please can you just..." Gail grimaced and tried to shake the words she heard out of her head, "Can you stop? Can you just shut your face?"

"Maybe you should try it. You know, it might help you get over Holly."

Gail had no intentions of getting over Holly; in fact she was more concerned about getting under her. But the others, with the exception of Frankie and the ever-suspicious Chloe and Traci, didn't know that they were trying again, or that Gail was taking it more seriously. She didn't want them getting into her head like they had before. It didn't help with her insecurities to feel the pressure of everyone knowing her business. But she couldn't stop herself from arguing. "I don't need to get over Holly."

"What? I thought you guys broke up."

"No, we just didn't talk for a while."

Chris laughed and shook his head, "I wish I could be more like you."

"That goes without saying." Gail replied without missing a beat.

"I mean you're just like- you're like cold, ya know, but like, ya know, in a good way. You never get too wrapped up in anything. If something doesn't work out, no big deal, on to the next one. Kinda like Frankie too. Is that like a lesbian thing?"

Gail's face had hardened as she focused on the road while he spoke. But she let out a sugary laugh, "Yeah, you know what? I do think it's a lesbian thing. I do." She chuckled and turned her attention back to the road.

She shifted the car slightly and pressed the gas harder, ramming the passenger side tire directly into a crater in the street, threatening Chris' axle and successfully spilling his coffee all over him.

She feigned concern, "Oooh, god, that was a pothole." He shot her an angry look as he quickly grabbed napkins to wipe at his jacket. "Just kind of came out of nowhere."

They drove in silence as Chris pouted over his lost beverage and wet jacket. When they neared a bakery, Gail asked "Do you need another one?"

"Apparently," the boy sulked.

She pulled into the parking lot but kept the car running. They had a few minutes to spare anyway. "You're buying me one too and get me a cannoli while you're in there. Come on, chop chop."

Her normally good-natured friend sent her an actual glare as he headed into the shop. It was only a few minutes until he retuned with her treats and they continued on their way in slightly less bitter silence.

Luckily it was a short ride before they pulled up to campus and parked. Gail went to get out of the car when Chris grabbed her arm, "Hey, hey, hey you're touching me!" She barked and wrenched her arm, which was holding her coffee, away from him.

"Just wait, we can't go in yet." He was staring out the window in a panic.

She turned around and spotted their professor, Jarvis, and a woman exitting a car. The woman looked familiar, but Gail couldn't quite place where she had seen her before.

"Are you avoiding Jarvis?"

"What? No." Chris looked down at his backpack. "My foot's asleep. I can't walk around with one foot asleep."

As the woman reached over to adjust their professor's jacket in an intimate way, Gail realized that she was the woman married to the sour man. "Damn, his wife is pretty hot." She was way more attractive than their aging professor. "How the hell did that guy get such a hot wife?"

"She's into cops," Chris supplied readily. It was a well-known fact that Jarvis had been on the force for years before he took an early retirement after sustaining a gun-shot wound to the leg. It was why he was now a professor at the University.

Gail turned to look at her friend, the tone with how he said it was a little too confident. The other day they had been talking about the older woman he had gone home with, it turned out she was married but he had slept with her again anyway. It had become kind of a thing. "How do you know that?" Chris avoided looking at her, so she asked again more forcefully. "Diaz, how do you know that?"

"Gail..." Chris started, guiltily.

"That woman that you met at the bar that night. The married woman you're sleeping with is that woman?"

Chris immediately tried to defend himself. "I tried to break it off like three times last night. But then, she distracted me like three times...four times..." He trailed off wistfully.

Gail glared at her friend incredulously, but their argument was interrupted by a knock on the window.

It was Jarvis.

"Good morning, sir." Chris nervously greeted the older man as he rolled down his window.

"Diaz. You keep her purring."

Gail's jaw dropped open a bit and Chris was a stuttering mess as he replied, "Ex-excuse me?"

"Your truck. What is this an '87 or '88?" The man leaned back to admire the old vehicle. "My wife's car has a leak. Do you mind taking a look?"

"No...uh no sir."

"Great. She's right over there."

Chris nodded as the man walked away. Gail narrowed her eyes at him, "Break it off."

He grabbed his stuff and started to open his door, he held up his hands in desperation but went to help the woman. Gail got out of the car too, twirling around Diaz's keys as she leaned against his truck. She could see the flirting from where she was. Her friend was in so much trouble.

As she waited for the boy to join her so they could head to class together Gail pulled out her phone and texted a familiar number.

Officer Danger: So the bodysnatchers have struck again

The response came quickly.

Nerd Champion: Who's the pod person this time?

Gail glanced across the parking lot at her friend and watched as he hit his head on the hood of the car when his body jerked suddenly. She really didn't want to know what the woman had touched to get him to do that.

Officer Danger: Christopher

Nerd Champion: That's a shame. He was objectively cute for a male

Gail frowned at her phone and looked up to glare at the oblivious boy. She knew that Holly wasn't attracted to guys and it wasn't that she was actually jealous. But she sent an angry face anyway.

Officer Danger: :-(

Nerd Champion: No worries. He's not nearly as cute as you ;-)

Gail huffed at the description of her being cute, her breathing coming out as a visible puff in the winter air. But she struggled to contain the smile she felt creeping across her features at the thought of Holly calling her cute. She was typing out her response denying the term when Chris came back to join her.

"Did you end things?" Gail asked, not bothering to look up from her phone until she sent the message.

"Let's go to class." Chris deflected and walked past his friend and in the direction of the building they needed.

Gail rolled her eyes but felt her smile return when her phone buzzed with a response.

Nerd Champion: You're right. Cute doesn't begin to describe you.

Officer Danger: And how would you describe me?

Gail walked to class watching the little dots on her screen as she waited for a reply. While her morning class was boring as hell, flirting with Holly was definitely a good way to start the day.

---

"Could you be a little more Canadian?" Juliet asked as Tegan and Sara's Northshore pumped out of the speakers in Frankie's room. She had already been subjected to Alanis Morissette playing loudly over the weekend before the switch had been made to the duo's extensive collection. She leaned against the doorway of the other senior's room and took in the countenance of the prone brunette. Frankie's frown lines were deeply etched, pulling harshly at her lips and crinkling her brows as she stared up at the ceiling. She had seen her friend/former roommate like this from time to time over the years, definitely more than anyone else ever did, but it had been a while.

"I was actually aiming for incredibly homosexual, eh?" Frankie drolled, not bothering to look over to see the eyeroll she knew she earned with her comment.

Juliet reached over to lower the music before making her way to Frankie's bed. "Scooch," she ordered and the other senior grumpily moved to the side to make room for her. "You didn't come out with us last night like you promised."

"So?"

"So, how badly did you mess it up this time?"

Frankie didn't reply, preferring to continue drilling holes into the ceiling with her eyes.

Juliet sighed disappointedly, "You said you weren't planning on throwing anything away."

"She's not moving out, so why don't you save the lecture for someone who actually cares." Frankie's voice was a low rumble, a warning.

But Juliet ignored the acerbic tone. "I know she's not moving out, that's not why I'm here."

Frankie finally turned to look at her friend, "So then why are you here?"

"You've been locked in this room for days with the exception of going to class and the gym. You haven't even been going to the bar."

Frankie rolled her eyes, "Right, because my alcohol consumption is a direct correspondence to my well-being."

"What I meant was that you haven't been going on dates or trying to meet people. We both know that's your go-to when you're upset. That or you go mute and drink vodka while still managing to find various women to hook-up with." Juliet paused and pretended to ponder her own words. "Actually, yeah, your bar tendencies are kind of a reflection of your well-being."

"Whatever," Frankie grumbled and turned her attention back to the ceiling.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Juliet asked, even though she had every intention of forcing the other brunette to talk about what was bothering her even if she didn't want to. But she felt better going through the formality of asking.

Frankie quickly shot down that idea with a resounding, "No."

"Will you?"

"No."

"Come on Frankie, how can I help if you don't tell me what you did?" Juliet tried to cajole the stubborn girl whose bed she had invaded.

"I didn't ask for your help." Frankie declared before adding under her breath, "I don't deserve it."

But Juliet caught her friend's comment. "Yes, you do. Whether or not you want to ask for it. You deserve having people who care about you and want to see you happy."

Frankie snorted, "I really wish people would stop using that word." She was miserable and she knew it was her own fault, but she also genuinely believed that she was just a miserable person. She had never been the sunshine and butterflies type. And honestly, she never would be. "What really brought you in here?"

"It's been almost a week of really gay music, Frankie. You've brooded long enough, you need to start interacting with humanity again."

"Fuck humanity."

"You usually do." Frankie shoved her friend and Juliet barely managed to stay on the bed, though it didn't diminish her amusement at the indignant face Frankie made. Once her laughing subsided, and she knew she was safe from further physical retaliation, she settled closer to the other brunette. "I know you don't like talking to me about Chloe for...reasons...but you should talk to someone. It never does you any good to bury stuff inside."

The person Frankie had been turning to for Chloe-related stuff was Holly. But the last time she had spoken to the med student she had been warned that this was exactly what would happen. She was tired of her friends armchair shrinking her. "Can this session be over?"

"Fine." Juliet knew she'd have to try again later to get the obstinate girl to talk. She tried to change the subject. "Did you apply for graduation yet?"

Frankie's glare intensified. "I don't need a mother, Jules."

"So that's a no." Juliet commented, even though it was weird that Frankie hadn't yet applied. She was pretty sure Frankie had been looking forward to graduation even before she received her acceptance letter from the University. "Just don't forget, ok?"

"Yeah, yeah." Frankie waved off the concern. "When did you get so bad at this?"

"Bad at what?"

Frankie's face didn't change from the permanent scowl she had but her tone shifted to a slightly teasing one. "Attempting to cheer me up. I mean you were never great at it, but you didn't used to suck this much."

Juliet rolled her eyes before she rolled herself off of Frankie's bed. She turned back to the other senior. "C'mon get up."

Frankie resisted the tug to her arm. "No."

"Yes." Juliet pulled harder.

"Why?" Frankie whined as she continued to be a human blob.

Juliet stopped fighting and placed her hands on her hips. "Because I'm taking a page out of Gail's book and we're going to go shoot shit."

Frankie got up without another complaint.

---

"You don't fit in any of her boxes." Juliet informed Chloe as the redhead waited patiently at the bar for her roommate to come over to serve them. They had just gotten to the Penny, where they were meeting up with the boys after VM practice. Traci had joined Gail in donning their uniform, Andy was at basketball practice, and Frankie hadn't said a word but had vanished after they had convened for the day. That left Juliet and Chloe with just the boys, which finally gave the senior the perfect opportunity to talk to the freshman.

It had been a few days since Juliet had convinced Frankie to go to the range with her and although the other senior was talking more to her she was still being a hermit. Only now she was going out for classes, the gym, and play practice. But it had been almost physically painful to watch the way Chloe had avoided Frankie in the small circle of girls who would be performing in a few weeks and the way Frankie stole glances any time she thought no one was watching. It wasn't that the senior had blatantly acted any differently than her normally bitchy self in front of the others. But Juliet had caught those private moments, those long looks, and she knew she had to at least try to talk to the freshman since obviously talking to Frankie hadn't helped.

"What?" Chloe smiled a genuinely confused smile as she bopped around in the barstool to the music playing over the speakers of the bar.

"Frankie compartmentalizes. It's how she deals. There's a box for dating, a box for friends, a box for her hometown, one for school. But you don't fit neatly into one of the boxes. She doesn't deal well with blurred lines." Four years of living with the girl had taught Juliet a lot about her. She wasn't even sure the brunette knew that she did it, but Frankie tried to keep all the aspects of her life separate, or as separate as she could. But Chloe, well that girl could never fit in just one box.

Chloe's movements stopped and her smile faded. "Umm...ok?" Juliet never talked to her about Frankie. It was similar to the way that Frankie never talked about why she had been so pissed at Juliet earlier in the year. Of course, Frankie never really liked talking about anything even remotely resembling feelings, so that wasn't a surprise. But this was.

"Basically you scare the shit out of her." Juliet translated to make her message clear. It was mostly speculation on her own part combined with very little hard evidence provided by the small amount of words Juliet had managed to coax out of Frankie. But Juliet knew her friend and if Frankie was feeling anything that even remotely resembled real feelings for the redheaded freshman she was going to run for the hills. It didn't help that Chloe was nothing like the women Frankie normally got involved with.

Chloe snorted bitterly. "I don't scare her. I annoy her."

Juliet laughed, "Everyone annoys her. That doesn't mean anything. Hell, I've been annoying her for four years now."

"Well, maybe it means something to me."

Juliet nudged the girl next her and smiled warmly, "You do realize that you don't actually annoy her, right? That that's just how she is."

Frankie may have been a grouch most of the time, but she wasn't always. She could be sweet (to Chloe) and funny and goddamn sexy. Still, Chloe refused to be with someone who couldn't even admit to liking her. She had accepted Frankie's fear of love and commitment before she had agreed to go on a date with the senior, but Chloe wasn't going to be with someone who couldn't admit, even in private, that they wanted to be with her too.

"Yeah, well, looks like Nick was right." Chloe mumbled as she glanced down the bar to where her roommate was still serving other patrons hoping to grab her attention.

"What do you mean Nick was right?" Juliet was confused by what her boyfriend had to do with Chloe and Frankie.

"He warned me that Frankie would hurt me."

"Why would he think that?"

Chloe caught the annoyance in the older girl's voice. She tried to backtrack, realizing that she had gotten her friend in trouble with his girlfriend. "Doesn't matter, just forget I said anything."

"No, I'm not forgetting it." Juliet glanced across the bar at Nick who was laughing at something the other guys were saying. "What did he say about Frankie?"

"He just reminded me of her reputation, you know?"

"No, I don't. Enlighten me."

"It's not a big deal. He just compared her to Gail and warned me that I would get hurt because we were so different." Chloe rushed out the words and hoped to mitigate the damages. "Really, it's no biggie, he didn't say anything I didn't know already." Actually, that wasn't completely true. Yes, Chloe knew Frankie's reputation and how she came off to people, but actually having her friend warn her had burst her bubble a bit and had made it easier for Jen's words to bother her more.

Juliet nodded, but her eyes narrowed and her jaw clenched. "Excuse me for a minute."

Chloe watched the brunette storm over to where the boys were seated. Nick's smile dropped when she pulled him away from the group. Chloe could her the other boys' jeers about how Nick was in trouble, but she didn't bother going over. Juliet's words were already replaying in her head. She stared at the back of the bar, lost in her own thoughts.

"What are you waiting for Princess?" Gail's question broke Chloe from her reverie.

"Oh ummm..." Chloe's mind was still on what Juliet had meant and she forgot entirely what she had been waiting on Gail for.

"Were you thinking about glass slippers and birds who dress you?" Gail teased. The jokes would never get old to her.

"You know an awful lot about those movies you claim to hate."

"I grew up with McNally. I was forced to watch them." Elaine had never been a fan of Disney movies or really any movie that promoted young women waiting around for their Prince Charming to come. It was something Gail could agree with in hindsight, but at the time, kids just want to watch cartoon movies and sing along to catchy songs. So spending time with Andy meant watching the stuff she never would at home. It went along with listening to love songs and reading self-help books. "But I prefer the Grimm's fairy tales."

"Of course you do." Her roommate's morbid look on life was the polar opposite of Chloe's unending optimism. But the two had learned along the way to coexist without losing those pieces of themselves.

Chloe let the conversation drop and went back to staring at the bottles as her mind continued to decipher Juliet's comments. She ignored her roommate entirely so the bartender went to serve the people flagging her down.

When Gail returned she found that Chloe still hadn't moved. "Ugh, I really dislike it when you people make me ask. It makes it seem like I really care." The bartender whined.

"Ask what?"

Gail grabbed a clean bar towel and tossed it over her shoulder like people always do on TV. "So what's on your mind?" She drawled. It wasn't that bartenders were really confidants but it always seemed to work in fiction and her friends liked to isolate themselves at the bar when they had something bothering them.

"You're getting pretty good at that. It's does almost sound like you care." Chloe deflected.

"I'm good at everything I do." Gail started to make Chloe a drink without being asked. She knew what her roommate liked and if she was going to hang out at the counter then the redhead should at least have a drink in her hand to mope with.

"Thanks, but I didn't order this."

"Technically you haven't ordered anything even though I've asked." Gail pointed out and nudged the pink drink closer to Chloe's empty hand. "What did Ward say that has you so out of it?"

Chloe lifted the glass up for a sip. It was strong yet sweet and the burn was a nice but fleeting distraction. "She was talking to me about Frankie."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

Recovering from her surprise, Gail asked, "So what did she have to say?"

But Chloe shook her head, refusing to go further down that road. "Doesn't matter. It's not Frankie who said any of it."

"How do you know that?" It was entirely possible that whatever Juliet decided to share with Chloe was something Frankie had told her; probably in confidence considering few people in their circle could keep their mouths shut. And not a single one of them seemed to be capable of minding their own business. Gail included.

"She was talking about Frankie's feelings."

Gail nodded in understanding, taking back her argument completely. "Yeah, you're right. Anderson definitely didn't say it."

"But even if she did. She didn't say it to me so it doesn't count." The last thing Frankie had actually said to Chloe was that they were nothing more than two people having sex. So if something had changed or Frankie actually wanted more than that the brunette was going to have to say it herself. Regardless, Chloe wasn't going to wait around and find out. She was tired of this constant battle.

"You're really holding on to this whole being pissed at her thing, aren't you?" Gail did feel bad for Frankie in a lot of ways. She knew that Frankie had real feelings for her roommate. She was beginning to be more open about them. So either that had freaked Frankie out or something else had happened to spook the senior. Either way, Gail knew what it was like to try to keep the person you wanted most at arm's length. But she had been fortunate enough to keep getting more chances.

"I'm not pissed. But I'm not going to keep trying to be with someone who doesn't want to be with me. So I'm moving on."

"What does that mean?"

"Means I'm going out on a date on Saturday."

"With?"

"Sue Tran's roommate. We met at the party last weekend and Dov set-up a double date thing."

Gail scoffed, "Seriously?" She shook her head at the ridiculousness.

"What?"

"Over 80,000 students and yet no one can date outside of this circle of people."

Chloe rolled her eyes. "Last time I checked, you met Holly through Frankie."

That wasn't true. Technically Gail had met Holly when the brunette ran her ass over in the park during a morning jog that her housemates still didn't know about. And then again at the bar back when Holly was dating McD. Hell, they would've met eventually when she was introduced to "Steve's girlfriend." Regardless of how it happened, fate saw to it that it would happen. Just thinking of the brunette, Gail was hit by a warmth that made it hard to keep a smile off her face.

But Chloe had caught the shift in the blonde's features. "Aw it's so cute when you think of Holly!" She sing-songed.

Gail narrowed her eyes, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing, Roomie, thanks for the drink." Chloe winked and decided to get away from the bar before the bartender threatened her for calling her cute. But she had been. Gail might not have known it, but the inadvertent smile on her face had softened her hard edges. And it was adorable.

---

"Peck, something came for you." Traci called out as she walked into the hallway of their house, package in hand and Jerry close to her hip. She had some time before she had to join the bartender at work that night and planned on enjoying some alone time with her boyfriend. They found Gail seated on one of the counters in the kitchen helping herself to a bag of cheesepuffs.

"What are you talking about? I didn't order anything."

Gail finished her snack and requested that they bring it over to check the label on the package. "Can you read, Nash? This one's for Anderson."

"Sorry, I just assumed since you're the shopaholic in the group."

"Just because I actually have money in my pocket doesn't make me addicted to anything."

"No, you buying enough crap to fill both this place and next door does."

"I sent it all back."

"Correction: Chloe sent it all back."

Gail opened her mouth to argue some more when Traci caught sight of Frankie coming back from the gym.

"Hey Anderson, something came for you." Traci gestured to the heavy box. Frankie gave her a confused look before recognition dawned on the senior's face. She took the package with her to her room without a word.

"You're welcome," Traci called up the stairs to the rude older girl but she didn't get a response.

"That's just how she is, Babe." Jerry reminded the girl in his arms as he pressed a soft kiss to her temple.

"Seriously between the two of you..." Traci shook her head at both of her temperamental housemates. If it wasn't one then it was always the other getting in one of these moods and just generally being a jerk.

But Gail wasn't paying attention. She pulled out her phone ready to text Holly that Traci needed to borrow her glasses when a call came in from Celery. She stepped away from where the couple was talking to answer it.

Frankie came back down freshly showered and found the blonde perched on the counter again. This time she was distractedly picking at something out of a container that resembled real food.

"What are you eating?"

"Princess's leftovers."

"I'm pretty sure whatever is in it is dead already. You don't have to keep stabbing it."

Gail ignored her and continued to absently push the food around with her fork. Frankie had never been one to push other people about their feelings if she could avoid it so she let the younger girl sulk as she tried to satisfy her growling stomach.

"Is there any other food in the house?" Frankie grumbled as she searched the refrigerator for something edible that wasn't in a pink Tupperware container.

"Nothing Price hasn't made if that's what you're asking."

"Ramen it is." Frankie muttered to herself as she went to the cupboard to pull out a bag of pure sodium. She dumped it in water and popped it into the microwave.

"You're being pedantic."

"You're being a word snob."

"Need to borrow a dictionary, Anderson."

"Only so I can throw it at your head." The two girls glared at each other until the microwave dinged and Frankie became more concerned with her food. "What crawled up your ass and died?" She asked the capricious freshman before taking a bite of noodles.

"Maybe I'm just tired of you being a little nudnik because my roommate dumped your sorry ass. It's pathetic."

Frankie's gripped tightened on the fork in her hand. "Is this because you have a Peck dinner this weekend? Oh god, the horror." She mocked the blonde, despite the fact that she was thankful every day that her family lived too far away to demand such a thing.

The prospect of the dinner certainly wasn't helping Gail's mood. It also hadn't helped that Celery had called to invite Gail over for a small get-together on Sunday to welcome Oliver home and basically celebrate his recovery. She hadn't seen Oliver since that day in the hospital and she couldn't go because of the dinner but mostly she had turned the Wiccan down because she didn't think Oliver would want her there. Picking a fight with Frankie wasn't the most mature thing to do, but Gail never claimed to be. At least she wasn't kicking puppies.

"Would you like to go? They're soulless vampires who survive off of insecurity and fear. You'll make a delicious snack."

"Explains the complexion, Carmilla."

The comment almost made Gail laugh. If Frankie had seen a picture of Goth Gail she would probably understand the irony of her comment better. She really did look like a vampire during that time.

"At least I don't glitter in the sun."

"Good point."

And just as easily the hostility between the two girls was squelched. The two ate their food while discussing vampires until it was time for the blonde to go to work.

"Five bucks if you go upstairs and tell Nash it's time for work." Gail waggled her eyebrows in an attempt to entice the brunette into taking up her offer.

"You want me to cockblock Barber?"

"Maybe?"

"No thanks, you can do your own dirty work."

"Whatever. What's the female equivalent of cockblocking?"

"Have you never heard of Google?" Frankie smirked when Gail rolled her eyes. "There's a lot of terms my personal favs include: twat-swatting, cliterference, and clam jamming."

"Noted." Gail headed up the stairs to grab her work stuff and to ruin Traci's fun.

---

"Aright my Petulant Peck, you're paying for lunch." Oliver demanded good-naturedly as he headed in the direction of their squad car. He had a head start as she tripped over her own heavy boots. Her hands gripped at the bulky utility belt on her waist. Her radio crackled to life and she stopped walking to listen to it.

"Shots fired at 155 King Street. Repeat shots fired. All available units please respond."

"That's u,s Peck, shake a leg." Oliver called out.

She hurried her steps but the squad car and Oliver only seemed to get further away.

He came out of no where. A man covered in black stepped up behind Oliver who was standing beside the car waiting for Gail to reach him. Gail heard the sickening crunch of the butt of a rifle against Oliver's skull before her friend collapsed in a heap.

Her hands immediately went to her waist for the gun that should be there but there was none in the holder. What cop forgets their gun?

She watched in horror as the man pulled off his mask and points his gun at her fallen friend. She recognized the red hair even before the eyes that mirror her own.

"Steve, no!"

But then there was the loud crack of a gunshot.

Gail awoke with a gasp in complete darkness. It took her a minute to remember that she was in the room of the house she shared. Her hand hurt and she realized she had balled it into a tight fist. She relaxed her grip and went to rub her hands over her face. She felt the wetness of tears she hadn't realized she had shed. She must have been crying in her sleep. She looked over to where her roommate slept, grateful that Chloe was still out cold and couldn't see her. She rubbed more angrily at her face; frustrated that this kept happening and not knowing how to stop the nightmares from continuing to plague her nights. She only had a few more hours before she'd have to get up to shower before classes, but there was no way in hell she wanted to sleep.

She reached over to her phone and opened her messages, it immediately opened to the text her brother had sent reminding her of Sunday dinner when she planned her shifts for the week. She hadn't bothered answering it when she got it and contemplated doing it now to wake Steve as payback for her dream. But knowing him he'd sleep right through the little chirp of his phone. She closed their conversation and opened the one from Holly. The last messages had been the ones she had ignored from the brunette while she had been at work. She scrolled through and thought about how many times she had asked her to hide away at her place. She couldn't ask again. Not now. Not this soon after showing up as a mess on Holly's doorstep less than a week before. And especially not when the med student had classes in the morning. She didn't want Holly to realize how weak she was.

So she closed out of the texts and opened up the browser on her phone. She pulled up flights to places she had been. It always seemed to help relax her when Holly asked her about her trip so maybe it would work even without the brunette beside her. Gail thought about the things she would tell Holly if she asked. But then she drifted to other flights. To the places she hadn't been. To places no one would be able to find her if she just took off right then in the dead of the night. She could do it again, couldn't she?

---

There had been a time when Frankie loved being in her uncles' garage learning how to fix cars. She enjoyed figuring out what went wrong, where the problem was, and going through the steps of repairing it. She remembered the pride on their faces when she struck a deal with the men when she was just 10 years old: they would get an old junk car for her and she'd fix it up herself so she could have one when she was old enough to drive. She realized back then that with four kids it would be impossible for her parents to ever get her one, but her uncles had always been impressed by her ingenuity. For her 14th birthday they took her to pick out her piece of crap car with the promise that if she worked in the shop they would help her with it. Almost every day Frankie went to work for her uncles, helping them with stuff around the office and shop just for the chance to work on her own vehicle, which slowly transformed into a functioning commodity.

It wasn't until she got caught with LauraLee that her mother started to make her displeasure of Frankie hanging around the shop with all the men into a real problem. She was forbidden from spending her afternoons there, which didn't stop her from sneaking over anyway at first. Her car was still on the line. If she didn't go it would never get done and she would be carless. She craved that freedom. But then the night came where she overheard her parents' not-so-quiet voices discussing plans to send her to a camp to "fix her" and she realized how insane they actually were. The next day she had gone to school and finally taken hockey star Justin up on his offer for a date. She never went back to the garage after that either.

Her uncles though had held onto the car for her and after finishing the repairs themselves, gave it to her as a birthday present on her 16th birthday. But all of this was before she went to college and things changed for the worse.

She had stopped working on cars aside from her own. She never told her friends that she could fix their problems or change their oil for them whenever they needed to take one of theirs into a shop. She even kept quiet when they were stuck on the side of the road with flats, instead taking a nap in the backseat while they waited for a tow truck.

It wasn't until Chloe, and her godforsaken-bucket-of-rust-that-she-called-a-car, came into her life that she let someone else know about her mechanical knowledge. And it was why she found herself walking into the freezing cold garage that stored the inoperable vehicle, with the parts that had arrived in the mail the other day, despite the fact that they still weren't talking or could even stand to be in the same room.

The box had been taunting her while it sat in her room. She remembered staring at her computer trying to explain to Chloe what it was that they were looking for and searching for the cheapest price possible. The redhead had been sitting in her lap asking questions before trying to distract Frankie. And Chloe, well she was a very good distraction, and had moved them to the bed right after Frankie clicked the confirmation button to show her a little appreciation.

Frankie tried to shake all the thoughts about her family and Chloe from her head. She placed the package, a six-pack, and the kit containing the tools her uncles had given her onto the floor near the space heater she had stolen from Sammy. He had inherited it from Oliver when he graduated. The thing barely worked before Frankie confiscated it, explaining that she didn't want the boy to set the house on fire playing with grown up toys. She chuckled to herself as she thought of Swarek's face when she had said that.

She turned on the ancient device in hopes that it would stop her from getting frostbite while she worked in the garage in the middle of winter. The space had been filled with junk before Chloe had convinced the boys to help her move enough stuff to fit her car in when they had realized it wasn't going to be drive-able for a while. Frankie had laughed at the freshmen at the time, both for Chloe's ability to get the boys to do her bidding and the guys for actually cleaning up the garage. They had tried to get her to help, but as Frankie had pointed out: she didn't help anyone.

Yet there she was, in an icebox, about to get her hands dirty for some girl who couldn't even look at her anymore. She felt pathetic. But she had promised the redhead that she would fix her car and Frankie had already broken enough promises in her lifetime.

So she popped open a beer and the hood of the car to survey the damage. It wasn't an easy fix this time but she knew what she had to do. She grabbed the jack and placed it in the proper divet in the chassis and lifted the vehicle. She had borrowed (stole) a creeper from the boys' house and used it to roll under the vehicle. She took a deep breath and tried to keep her mind clear as she focused on the task at hand.

She had been working for a few hours when the door connecting the house and garage opened, but Frankie was too distracted with the pieces in her hand to even notice.

"So, this is where you've been hiding." Holly called out as she entered the cold garage. She let out a small shiver and pulled her jacket tighter around her.

The sound of clanging metal rang out followed by "Ow, shit, fuck" as the wrench Frankie had been using slipped out of her hand and directly into her face.

"You okay?" Holly asked worriedly, she hadn't meant to frighten her friend.

Frankie rolled out from under the car holding the wrench in one hand and the quickly forming bump on her head with the other. She was covered in grease and oil and was scowling furiously at the brunette standing there. "Oh, I'm great. It feels awesome to take a wrench to the head. Want to find out for yourself?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

But Frankie didn't look appeased. She continued to glower as she rubbed at the painful spot on her skull. "What are you even doing here, Holly? Normally I have to find you."

"You haven't sought me out which is very unlike you and you've been ignoring my texts entirely. Not cool by the way." Holly hadn't heard from Frankie since the senior had stormed out of her room over a week ago. Every text she sent had gone unanswered.

"So you came here in person to give me an I-told-you-so. Well, you could've saved yourself a trip."

Holly leaned against the door she had just come through, crossing her arms tighter against her body. She had heard from Gail that the brunette had had some kind of fallout with Chloe and Holly had already assumed it was related to what Frankie had told her about that day. But she wasn't trying to rub anything in Frankie's face. She just wanted her friend to talk to her. "What was I right about?"

"You know exactly what you were right about."

"So you and Chloe still aren't talking?"

"No." Frankie focused her attention on the tool in her hand and not on the med student's face.

"Have you tried apologizing?

Frankie gestured around her, "Why do you think I'm out here freezing my balls off?"

"You don't have balls and I meant actually saying the words."

"Words are what got me into trouble in the first place." Frankie grumbled bitterly.

"Saying words that weren't true got you into trouble in the first place. Saying sorry usually helps," Holly pointed out.

"Whatever." Frankie growled and rolled under the car to get back to work. She had assumed that Holly would just leave if she was ignored but the medical student stayed put, grabbing a seat closer to where Frankie was working. Every so often she would pass Frankie a tool she needed, but mostly she just waited, figuring that Frankie would talk to her eventually.

"I really don't need your help." Frankie muttered as she finished tightening the last of the bolts. She slid out from under the vehicle and lowered it to the ground before opening the garage so she could test the engine.

"I know. Maybe I just like hanging out with you."

"You're a masochist, Stewart."

"Tell me about it."

"Don't you have a girlfriend you could be spending time with?" Frankie asked as she wiped her tools clean once she was satisfied with the way the engine now purred.

Holly ignored the question entirely. "So is your self-imposed isolation helping? Are you done with your penance yet?"

Frankie eyed her warily, "Why do you care?"

"Because we should go out tonight. It's Saturday night, come on."

"Maybe I don't want to."

"And how many times have you dragged me out when I haven't wanted to." Holly reminded her friend.

Frankie knew she was beat on that argument. Resigned to her fate, she only had one stipulation. "Fine, but if you try taking me to the Penny, I'll fuck BitchTits on your bed. And yes, that is a threat."

"Sheesh, calm down. I wasn't planning on going there anyway." Holly held up her hands in placation. She really hadn't been planning on going to the Penny, knowing that Gail was at work and not convinced the blonde wanted to see her at the moment. But she also hadn't wanted to get dragged out with her roommates and she had actually been worried about Frankie after being ignored for over a week. So she had come to the decision to force Frankie to go out with her somewhere the rest of the people wouldn't be.

Frankie nodded in gruff agreement before heading in to get cleaned up. It took an hour for her to shower off the dark marks on her skin and she still didn't feel entirely clean as she picked out an outfit to go out. Holly had sat on her bed trying to hurry the senior along to no avail. Frankie had taken her sweet time, dragging her feet every step of the way until they finally made it to a bar across town.

"Is this far enough away from home for you?"

Frankie narrowed her eyes in annoyance, making a face to show how unamused she was by Holly, but the taller brunette just laughed and slung an arm around her friend. "Come on, Sourpuss, first round is on me."

"You can bet your sweet ass the second round will be too."

"Aw, I knew you loved my ass." Holly laughed when Frankie went out of her way to check out her rump. She could see some of her friend's humor returning.

They were still laughing about asses as they entered the bar. But their mirth was short-lived when Frankie froze to the ground as they were making their way through the crowd.

"Hey what's wrong?" Holly asked as she felt her friend's hand dig into her arm preventing her from moving forward either. She followed Frankie's line of sight and felt her own stomach drop at the sight. Chloe was sitting in a booth with a girl she didn't recognize across from Dov and whom she assumed was Dov's girlfriend. This was exactly the kind of thing she had been trying to avoid.

She looked over at Frankie and the shorter girl wasn't able to hide the hurt that crossed her face fast enough. "Hey, let's go somewhere else."

But Frankie couldn't hear her over the blood rushing in her ears. Her entire body felt wrecked when she was hit with an unfamiliar feeling. It wasn't jealousy. That feeling she knew and loathed. Gabi used to go out of her way to make Frankie jealous until it stopped having its desired effect so she knew that this wasn't jealousy at all. This was an overwhelming feeling of regret tinged with a heavy-hand of disappointment. And it knocked the damn wind out of her system.

She was torn between leaving and grabbing a table where she could torture herself some more by watching the redhead who still hadn't looked her way, apparently too engrossed in whatever conversation was going on at the table. She saw the cute girl besides Chloe nervously place a hand on the other girl's arm and the sight of Chloe's smile in response snapped something inside of her. Before she knew it she was walking towards the booth.

"Whoa there, where the hell do you think you're going?" Holly barely managed to grab a hold of her friend stopping her from reaching her destination.

"Gonna go say hi."

"Oh no you're not, Frankie. You all still have to live together. Do not make this worse!" Holly quickly spun her around and forced her through the crowd, back out the way they came despite Frankie's protests. She knew that whatever Frankie said to the group it wouldn't be good.

Once they were outside in the fresh air Frankie seemed to calm down a bit, her body not quite as tense but Holly didn't let go of the other brunette as she tugged her further down the street to the next closest place that served alcohol. She knew they were going to need it.

"I guess not going to the Penny backfired. Sorry, Frankie." Holly apologized as they grabbed a small table.

But Frankie had managed to steel herself during the walk in the cold, cutting off any sort of feelings altogether. So she deflected. "Why didn't you want to go to there?"

"You were pretty adamant that I couldn't take you there. I distinctly remember a threat being involved."

"And you gave in way too easily. You normally want to at least stop by so you can make heart eyes at the bartender."

"I didn't think Gail would want me there."

"Why not?"

Holly shrugged. Things had been going just fine until the weekend approached and then Gail started getting distant again. Her texts becoming more sporadic and shorter. It wouldn't be weird except for the fact that Holly knew that she would be seeing her family the next day and it seemed that any time the Pecks were involved, Gail would become downright mean. So this time Holly let Gail have her distance, and she just hoped whatever storm passed wouldn't undo all the progress they had been making.

"Did Gail do something? Did you get into a fight? Is that why she bit my head off this week?"

"No." Holly replied simply, hoping to shut down the conversation entirely.

"Well that was reassuring."

"Gail hasn't done anything wrong, I don't know things are just weird. I've never really been in a situation like this before."

"Like what?"

"Like I can't figure out what we're doing. When I was dating Jess, I knew we were dating. With other girls if it was just a hook-up that was clear too. But nothing is clear with Gail."

"Do you want to be dating her?"

"Yes." Holy replied without hesitation. "I like Gail. But my feelings aren't really the ones I'm questioning."

"Gail likes you, Hols. A lot from what I can tell," Frankie offered. She may have only known the freshman for a few months but she had always had a pretty good read on people.

"So then why does she pull back every time we get closer?"

"Probably because it scares the ever-loving shit out of her."

"You talking about Gail or yourself."

"We were talking about you and the blonde, don't pull me into it."

"Oh, ok so Gail told you that?"

"Well, no, but..."

"But...?"

"I think it's time for more booze." Frankie flagged down the waitress and placed orders for drinks for both of them without consulting Holly.

"So I take it I don't have a say in what I drink tonight."

"Not one bit." Frankie replied. She drummed her hands on the table as she waited for the girl to return.

Holly picked up on the restlessness of her friend. "Do you want to talk about Chloe being on a date?"

"Nope!" Frankie shook her head firmly, "And I'm implementing a new rule: anytime you mention Chloe you have to do a shot."

"And what happens if you mention her?"

"Then I'll drink."

"Fine, same rule goes for Gail."

The waitress placed their drinks down and Frankie immediately ordered another round.

"Deal." They clinked glasses and downed the first shots to seal the deal.

---

Overall, it had been a pretty good night for Chloe. The double date had gone better than expected especially when Dov pulled out his trivia cards and Chloe beat him, impressing the girl she had been seated next to. Apparently Sue's roommate had asked her to help set them up that night after the party. Which had lead to Dov awkwardly asking her and Chloe excitedly agreeing. It had seemed like it would be the distraction she had needed and a good excuse to get out of the house. The only stipulation she had was not to go to the Penny where everyone was bound to be.

It turned out that Ami was a biomechanical engineering major and very polite. She was an open book to any question Chloe asked and even though she didn't quite get Chloe's sense of humor or free spirit she was really...nice. And at least this time she hadn't had to deal with various liquids getting thrown at her by her date's ex-whatevers. The only problem seemed to be that after a really pleasant night, a decent goodnight kiss, and even plans to hang out again she found her mind wandering back to the person who she had spent the other date with.

The same person who was now fast asleep seated on the ground with her legs outstretched and her back supported against the door leading to Chloe's bedroom.

"What are you doing?" Chloe asked as she nudged the senior awake with her foot.

Frankie's eyes opened sluggishly and not quite synchronously. "What are you doing?" Frankie accused, her words more than slightly slurred as she struggled to pick herself up. She failed and collapsed back into a heap against the door.

Chloe sighed, she hadn't expected to deal with the senior that night, especially not completely wasted and barring her access to her own room. "Trying to get into my room."

"The doorknob is broken." Frankie gestured to the piece of metal above her head. "It wouldn't open."

Chloe reached over and turned the knob, the door swung open easily under the senior's weight and sent the girl flying backwards.

Frankie stared at the door as if it had committed a great act of betrayal against her as she lay on the floor. Chloe shook her head and reached out for the older girl. "Come on, let's go." She grabbed a hold of Frankie's arms and hauled the brunette back to her feet. She had to keep a close hold to keep them both standing and Chloe hated that her heart sped up at the feel of Frankie's body against her own. She decided it was a product of her anger and not her residual attraction.

"I'm sorry." Frankie softly said as Chloe tried to maneuver them to the staircase leading to the senior's room.

"Oh good a drunken apology. Just what every girl wants." Chloe muttered more to herself than the inebriated brunette.

But it didn't stop the smartass from answering, "Works for Sammy usually."

Chloe frowned harder in order to stop herself from laughing at the mostly true statement. "What exactly are you sorry for?"

"Everything."

"That's a lot to apologize for." Chloe grunted as she bore most of the senior's weight instead of the railing that should have been shouldering the burden. The progress up the stairs was entirely too slow and unsteady.

"I know," Frankie replied solemnly.

The tone surprised Chloe and she was glad when the senior's attention was focused mostly on the precarious stairs and not on her reaction. They finally made it to top floor without taking a tumble back down.

"How was your date?"

Chloe froze, letting Frankie lean her weight against the railing she was able to angle her body so she could look at the senior but also stop her from falling down. "How'd you know about that?"

"Saw you."

"And so you got wasted. Who let you drink like this?"

"Holly. She kept cheating and tricking me into talking about you."

"Ouch." Chloe mumbled, but the senior didn't register it as she continued her rant.

"It was against the rules. Then she walked me home. She wanted me to stay at her place, but I couldn't do that."

"Why not?"

"BitchTits would be there and I don't want to have sex with her."

"You could just not have sex with her."

"Would've."

Chloe shifted them to the senior's room and unceremoniously dropped Frankie into her bed. The brunette faceplanted before managing to shift further up and turn over.

"You need to take off your pants," Chloe informed the sloshed senior.

"You first."

"No, mine are staying on, but yours are coming off."

"If you insist." After struggling way more than she should have Frankie finally rid herself of the tight denim and the shirt she was wearing before she laid back in her bed, eyes immediately starting to close.

"No, Frankie, you can't sleep on your back," Chloe sighed in exasperation and reaching for the underwear-clad woman. She didn't want to have to be that close to her when she was wearing so little clothing, but she also couldn't leave knowing that she was going to pass out on her back.

"I always sleep on my back," was the petulant protest.

"Not tonight you don't. Side or stomach, Francine."

Frankie looked wounded and pulled back from Chloe's touch. "Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Call me that, I don't like it."

"And I don't like coming home and dealing with a drunkard passed out at my door. Come on, turn over." Chloe tried again to tug on the senior, but to no avail.

"No, I sleep like this and you go here." Frankie gestured to her side where Chloe would normally tuck into anytime they fell asleep in the senior's bed. She would rest her head on Frankie's chest and wrap an arm and leg around the senior.

"The only place I'm going is to my own room as soon as I no longer have to worry about you choking on your own vomit in the middle of the night."

"I'm not going to puke."

"You don't know that."

"I do. I'm strong like ox." Frankie raised up her arms to flex her biceps to prove her point.

"And you weigh the same as one too," Chloe teased.

Frankie pouted, "You're supposed to be the nice one."

"Well you're a bad influence."

Chloe gave up the struggle and turned leave, but Frankie grabbed onto her hand gently. "Don't go."

"I have to go." Chloe couldn't stay. She couldn't be that close to Frankie and still protect herself. It was a slippery slope and she didn't want to go down it.

"Stay." Frankie requested; she gave the hand in hers a light squeeze.

"I can't." Chloe replied quietly. She looked at their joined hands. She could easily break the hold and leave. She could've been back in her room already. Yet she stayed rooted to the spot next to the senior's bed.

"Stay." Frankie repeated; her bleary green eyes seeking out Chloe's sharp hazel ones.

"It's not a good idea," Chloe protested weakly.

"Stay."

"It won't fix anything."

"Please."

The word came out as a quiet breath and Chloe felt her resolve deteriorate entirely. "Fine," she sighed before adding, "but only because you're annoying."

Chloe went to climb into the bed but Frankie stopped her, "No pants."

"Frankie, you are not getting me naked that easily."

Without a word the senior climbed out of her bed and stumbled to the dresser on the other side of her room. She pulled out a pair of pajamas for Chloe and handed them to the redhead before collapsing back down. "I thought you couldn't move."

Frankie smiled faux-innocently and Chloe shook her head at her. "Close your eyes."

Frankie made a big show of covering her eyes with her hand only to spread her fingers enough to peek through. Chloe tossed a pillow at her head before turning her back to the troublemaking senior and changed her clothes. It was an old t-shirt of Frankie's and a pair of warm checkered pants. They were extremely comfortable and if Chloe wasn't still as pissed as she was, there would be a good chance that she would steal them for herself. Once she was done she turned off the light and climbed into the senior's bed, tucking them both under the covers. She immediately turned to her side, keeping her back to Frankie, not wanting to let the brunette win completely.

Within seconds, Chloe felt the warm body of the bedowner mold behind her. Frankie's arm was draped lightly over her waist as if the brunette was consciously trying not to hold her down. Still it felt good to be wrapped up in Frankie's embrace. Too good. "I thought you sleep on your back."

"Not tonight." Frankie sleepily replied against Chloe's skin as she tucked her face into the crook of the younger girl's neck.

It caused a shiver to run down Chloe's spine and once again she hated herself for letting the older girl still have this effect on her. She was supposed to be moving on and finding someone who actually wanted to be with her. "You're the most frustrating person I know."

But the only reply Chloe received was the slight snoring of the inebriated brunette in her ear and the feeling of Frankie's arm falling heavier across her middle. Her body started to relax, knowing that she needed to get some sleep and not having the energy to get up or struggle with the weight on top of her. But she swore to herself it would only be until she was sure that the senior was asleep and wouldn't wake up with her movements.

By morning Chloe was long gone, leaving behind nothing more than a cold space in the bed.

---

"You look like hell," Gail informed a hungover Frankie as the senior dragged her sorry ass into the kitchen in search of caffeine and painkillers the afternoon after drinking with Holly.

"Thanks, Sunshine." The brunette grumbled as she impatiently punched the buttons on the coffeemaker. She was still dripping wet from the shower she took to try to wash away the alcohol that seemed to still be seeping out of her pores. She was proud of herself for not getting sick even if she couldn't remember how she got up to her room or out of her clothes. But waking up alone, she assumed she hadn't brought anyone home with her. She pulled out her phone to text Holly and confirm.

"Just calling it like I see it, Anderson."

"I wouldn't look in the mirror then, or might just realize how much of a bitch you are."

"I was going to offer you some food, but fuck it. You can starve, asshole."

"I really don't know what she sees in you."

"Who?"

"Holly. I mean you're hot and all, but you're not that hot."

"Excuse you. I am that hot."

"Nah, Frosty, you're really not. Especially when you're blocking my path to recovery." Frankie gestured to the cabinet behind the blonde that held a bottle of aspirin. There were also pills in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom but the idea of going upstairs again kind of made the senior want to throw up.

Gail rolled her eyes but shifted to pull out the bottle. She chucked it at Frankie's head and was disappointed when the brunette still managed to catch it in her weakened state.

Frankie tossed a couple of pills into her mouth before downing half a bottle of water. She gestured to the pot sitting next to the freshman. "What are you eating?"

"Mac and cheese. And, don't worry, you can thank Kraft for its existence."

Frankie ignored the barb in favor of getting something in her stomach, especially something she didn't need to make herself. It was weird that Gail was actually being nice enough to share and when Frankie looked into the pot it was still mostly full. The blonde only seemed to be picking at her food. "You okay?"

"Stellar."

"Super believable."

"At least I don't look like something that was scraped off the side of the road."

"I hope Holly feels like as much shit as I do." Frankie pulled out her phone to text the med student and see how she was recovering.

"Holly? Is that who you drank with last night?"

"Yep."

"What did you two get up to?" Gail tried to sound as uninterested as possible. But it was weird that the two girls would go drinking and not end up at the Penny. It was also weird that she had no idea they had gone out. That would usually be something Holly would mention. Then again Gail hadn't been doing the best job of responding to messages or talking in general. She just was feeling off and didn't want Holly to see and worry.

"An orgy." Frankie laughed when the blonde bit down on her fork hard enough to hear the clatter of teeth on metal.

"Hilarious, Anderson."

"Who says I'm joking?" She was entirely kidding but maintained a straight face. When the blonde's glare only intensified, she finally relented. "Fine, we went to a bar." Frankie was struck with the memory of Chloe at the first bar they went to and felt that same pang again in her chest at the thought of the redhead moving on. She knew she had no right to be upset. She had claimed to want this but she felt it anyway. The spiraling feeling on regret weighed heavily on her but this was a mistake she may be too late to fix.

"And drank yourselves stupid."

"Blasphemy. Holly is Einstein status even when she's drunk, and I'm no slouch either. But you can relax, she brought me home and then went back to her place." Frankie could remember Holly sharing the cab back to her place. She also remembered turning the bespectacled brunette down on the offer to hide at her apartment. No, she had been determined to go home. She remembered stumbling on the stairs and struggling with a door after that but it was still mostly a blur.

"She's free to do whatever she wants."

"You really mean that?"

Gail didn't respond. No, she didn't mean it. She didn't want Holly hooking up with other people. But she still wasn't ready to have that conversation and make anything official.

"Be careful what you wish for, Peck." Frankie warned.

Gail heard the melancholy in Frankie's tone and wondered if the senior knew about her roommate's date. She had heard the redhead coming in sometime after sunrise and assumed that had been a sign of a good date, but she hadn't bothered speaking at time or even shooting the other freshman with a plastic bullet. They hadn't talked much either before Chloe had left to go to the gym with the rest of the girls in the house. But she figured her roommate would give her a play-by-play later whether she wanted to hear it or not. Still, if Frankie knew that had to suck whether or not the brunette had brought the pain onto herself. She knew that feeling.

"I gotta get work done before tonight." Gail said as she hopped off the counter, leaving the food for Frankie but pouring herself a cup of coffee.

"Right, Peck dinner tonight. Need me to hit you with a car or something beforehand?"

"Not a good enough excuse, unfortunately. I gotta be there, dead or alive."

"Yeah, but my way would probably be less painful."

Gail couldn't argue with that reasoning. She thought back to the pills she knew she still had. She could probably justify taking them as prophylaxis for dealing with her family.

---

"Hello Garbage Pail." Steve greeted as she slid into his car.

Gail didn't say anything, but just stared out the window as he pulled away and started making the trip out to suburbs. They traveled in mostly silence with Steve's music playing quietly in the background. Her brother for once didn't try to make conversation, knowing that she was still mad at him. They hadn't properly spoken since Oliver was shot. Even now when they were heading into the Devil's Den where she would be up against her mother, she still wasn't ready to talk to him.

The night went painfully slowly and she kind of wished she had followed through with her own plan or at least Frankie's. After the initial greetings and critiques of Gail's clothing and hair, she had had to suffer through countless stories of things going on in the force about people she couldn't care less about. She had already earned multiple stern looks from both Peck parental units for making comments under her breath. But she couldn't just sit there quietly listening to the steady stream of hypocrisy.

By the time they actually sat down to eat, even Elaine had seemingly given up trying to include her daughter in the conversation, which was why Gail's guard had been down and she wasn't expecting the question.

"Why were you at the crime lab last weekend?"

Gail had been focused on cutting her food but her eyes snapped up at the mention of the lab. She found her mother staring expectantly at her, waiting for an answer. It was confirmation that the Superintendent's spies really were everywhere. But she couldn't exactly tell her mother that she was visiting the girl she was dating when as far her parents were concerned that woman was Steve's girlfriend. Oh, and she was supposedly straight.

"I was umm..." She stalled trying to wrack her brain for any good reason she would be hanging out with Holly on a Saturday afternoon. But Elaine's eyes only seemed to narrow further at the lack of response.

Steve cut into the conversation, "I asked her to bring Holly lunch for me."

"Why would you do that?" Elaine's suspicions remained raised and focus stayed glued to her daughter, who rarely went out of her way to do favors for others. She also knew that Gail stayed away from the department unless she was ordered to be there.

"I was just trying to earn some brownie points. Holly works really hard and sometimes she forgets to eat."

In the past, Gail had honestly found it amusing to think of Steve and Holly dating. But this time, listening to him actually got under her skin. She had been the one who was worried about Holly working too hard. She had been the one trying to earn points with the brunette. She knew it wasn't real, but it didn't stop her from hating it. Steve was probably just trying to help her out, cover for her, but what if she didn't want the help? The only problem was that there was nothing she could say so she bit her tongue and focused back on the food in her plate.

"She's a keeper, Steven, I trust you realize that." Gail grip on the utensils in her hand tightened at her mother's comment.

"Of course, Mother."

Seemingly satisfied with her son, the Superintendent returned her attention to the sulking blonde. "What about you, Gail?"

"What about me, Mother?"

"Anyone that you have been seeing?"

Why did the question not feel like a question at all? She wondered how good the spies really were if they hadn't figured out that Steve was dating Shayna not Holly or the she and Holly were seeing each other. Then again it could all just be a trap. "No, Mother, but I thought you would know that. I thought you kept tabs on us."

Ignoring the barb, the elder Peck continued, "If that's so then why don't you give one of the boys from New Year's a chance? It wouldn't hurt you to socialize with people with bright futures."

Gail felt a stab thinking about her friends at home. They were all so excited to go into policing and yet in her mother's eyes that wouldn't be good enough. Sure, some of them would ascend the ranks and catch the Superintendent's attention, but the majority would be happy just doing their jobs and doing them well. But patrol was only a stepping stone for Pecks. There was no settling.

"I think I'm busy enough with classes, work, and volunteering, Mother."

"Yet you have time to go to the lab for lunch. Maybe you should pick up some shifts around the station."

"Maybe I could just get kidnapped again. Sounds like just as much fun." The words weren't meant to be spoken aloud but they had been and Gail was caught with a panic that maybe she had said them a little too clearly under her breath.

"You shouldn't mumble, dear."

"I said maybe I could find some time later. The semester only just started." Gail quickly reworded her previous statement and spoke louder.

"There's no point waiting for later. Life doesn't just wait around for you to live it, Gail."

Gail didn't respond, only giving a curt nod in acknowledgement, and went back to focusing on her food. It felt like everything seemed to stick in her throat and her appetite was gone as the conversation continued around her about things that were of little concern to the youngest Peck.

After another admonishment of Gail's lack of focus from the Superintendent, Steve cleared his throat to draw attention to himself.

"So I have an announcement." He smiled widely as all eyes turned to him in anticipation. "I got the taskforce."

As their parents congratulated the Golden Boy, Gail snorted derisively. "Oh good, it only cost Oliver his reputation, his job, and a lung." This time Gail enunciated, her words rang out clear as day.

"Damn it, Gail!" Bill's hand slammed against the table, shaking it with the amount of force. The silverware and dishes clattered. Both Steve and Gail froze stock-still and wide-eyed as their father's voice rose. "You are a Peck and you need to start acting like one."

Gail didn't know what to say, her father rarely raised his voice or even bothered with reprimands as that was their mother's forte. He had mastered the art of silent disapproval and could cut his children down with a look and refusal to even acknowledge their existence let alone their worth when they did something to "disgrace" the family name.

"Your brother earned this by doing as is expected of the members of this family. You need to learn this and stop being so childish and reckless."

Gail jaw clenched tightly to refrain from fighting back. She wanted to ask her father the same things she had asked her mother and brother in the hospital. She wanted to know what had happened to their teachings about loyalty and honor. But of course all that had to come second to ambition and advancement. She came from a family of Slytherins.

Deciding that she could never win, Gail spent the rest of the night tightlipped and glaring at the plates on the table. Her family went back to their conversations and just ignored her presence entirely until it was time to leave. Steve had been the one to make the excuses to try to get them out of there and when they were finally freed he had ushered his sister to his car as quickly as he could. He drove back to the heart of the city unsure of what exactly to say and stealing furtive glances at his withdrawn sibling.

They were more than halfway back to her house when Gail finally decided to break the silence. "Steve, what's going to happen to us?"

"Huh?" Steve was startled that his sister had actually spoken to him.

"The gangbangers you arrest everyday have each other's backs more than we do."

Steve kept his focus on the road in front of him. "We've been getting by so far."

"Really?" Gail asked him incredulously. After everything that had happened recently how could he really think that?

"Yeah."

"Do you really want to be the stubborn one in this? Steve, you let Oliver take complete responsibility for what happened that day. You're hiding your relationship with Shay by pretending to date my-by pretending to date Holly? You'll do anything to live up to their expectations."

"They just want what's best for us, Gail."

But Gail shook her head at her brother. "How can you let Ollie get thrown under the bus by them?"

"Oliver will be fine. And despite what you think he did break protocol going over there. But I've already tried defending him the best that I can."

"So you told them that you stayed behind for no good reason?"

"I told them what I had to. Despite what you want to think, I didn't do anything to purposefully get Oliver in trouble."

"No, you just didn't do anything to help."

"He's an adult, Gail. We all are. Oliver told IA that he told me to stay and went out on his own. I feel bad about it but Oliver's healing just fine and will be back on the job soon."

Gail knew that much was true. What exactly the consequences would be of what had happened she still wasn't sure. She knew she would have to talk to her friend to find out. Maybe if there was something she could do to mitigate the Peck collateral damage she would. But she would need to talk to him first.

They drove a bit longer before she spoke again. "And what about Shay?" If Steve would come clean about his real girlfriend then he wouldn't have to keep up this charade with Holly but Gail didn't want him to know how much it actually bothered her.

"Do you- do you want to talk about this now?" Steve's voice made it clear that it was the last thing he wanted to talk about.

"I mean I didn't really get you and her at first, but you seem happy."

"Ouch." Steve replied as he continued to focus on driving, while silently praying the drive and conversation would be over soon.

"She's going to dump your ass if you keep it a secret for much longer. But I guess self-sabotage really is a Peck thing. You kind of just wanna run away when things get complicated."

Steve was offended that his sister would lump them in the same category when it came to relationships. She was the one with the reputation of literally running away, "Speak for yourself. I would do anything for Shayna."

"Except tell Mom and Dad that you're dating her, not Holly."

"It's not my fault that you constantly want to blow up your relationship with Holly. Okay? Or are you still refusing to call it what it is?"

Gail ignored his remarks, "One of us has got to break the cycle. And, technically, I think it should be you because you're getting a little old."

Steve continued to stare at his sister with his annoyed expression. "You know, I actually asked Shay if it was okay to keep it under wraps. And she told me about why keeping it a secret was bothering her so much. She was worried I didn't think she was good enough to meet our parents."

"So, she has no idea they're hypercritical egomaniacs who will never find anyone good enough for their precious son." Except Holly, of course. The med student was perfect in every way and had already won over the Peck family's affections. Her parents just didn't realize that the person she was really with was their daughter: "The Fuck-up"

"No, she doesn't, but I assured her that she means everything to me. It's not about her being good enough, I just don't want them interfering with her career."

"Wow, it actually sounds like you were actually listening for the first time in your life."

"Yeah, because I was! We're going to be fine. You're going to be fine." It was meant to be a reassurance after everything their parents had said to the younger Peck during the night.

"You're still pretending to date Holly, Steve." Gail pointed out, trying to drive home the point.

"Nobody's perfect!" Steve protested as they finally reached their destination.

Gail dropped the argument and got out of the car without another word, not even a good-bye. She was relieved to finally make it home and away from the pressures of her family. She went into her house and ignored the greetings of the other freshmen that had been studying in the girls' living room, making a beeline straight to her room to hide away in. She felt raw and didn't want to have to hear about how easy her life must be being a Peck. She knew people had it much worse than her but it still didn't make the burden any easier to bear.

---

Gail knows she'll have a nightmare. She knows it. She can feel the apprehension, the tendrils of fear curling around her consciousness as she stares up at her ceiling, her eyes burning with exhaustion. It was why she had been avoiding Holly, not wanting to get invited over to spend the night. She hates the fact that Holly has seen her broken already, has seen her defenses stripped, and her heart exposed.

She also really didn't want to get used to the comfort. She didn't like feeling like she needed Holly to feel safe and calm. But that was what Holly did for her. She didn't judge, or push, or prod her. She had gotten accustomed to using sex in an effort to make herself feel better and to forget about what was plaguing her. But something had shifted along the way in the time she had known the brunette. When she thought of going over to Holly's to forget about everything, it wasn't sex she was seeking. She didn't want to just go there, fuck Holly as a distraction, and then bolt back to her house to hide away. And that feeling actually terrified her more than any other.

So she continued to lay in her bed staring at her ceiling. She had tried getting some work done for school but her mind couldn't focus on it. The readings for the one major reminded her of the path she had no choice in and the other reminded her of the failings her family held against her. She tried music, but none of the songs seemed to satisfy the swirling pit of emotions she was trying to stem, but without it the silence of the room felt deafening, the walls stifling, and the loneliness overwhelming.

She was tired and alone, but mostly she just felt tired of being alone.

---

Holly had gotten home from the lab before dinner. The shift had felt even longer when she was still recovering from the night before where Frankie had cheated and tried to get her to talk about Gail every chance she got. If it hadn't been wildly inappropriate she would've worn sunglasses while she worked. Instead, she had had to settle for drinking gallons of water and Gatorade while taking painkillers throughout the day.

She ate with her roommates, who refused to feed her till after she showered away the smell of death and chemicals. After enduring multiple innuendos about Frankie from Lisa and questions about Gail from both of them, she had opted to study in her room alone instead of joining them in the living room. They were too much of a distraction and she was already busy enough thinking about Gail and how she would feel after dinner with her family. A part of her hoped Frankie had been right the night before that Gail really did like her and was just freaked out by it. Because it could justify Holly giving Gail the space she probably needed to figure out what she wanted.

Holly did her best to push thoughts of the blonde away and focus on her studies. She curled up on her bed where she could spread out all her books, notes, and computer and set her mind to task. She got swept up in what she was learning, mesmerized by anatomy and physiology, trying to understand how things functioned to the point that she barely heard the knock on the door of her shared apartment or the muffled sounds of her roommates talking to someone.

It wasn't until her bedroom door was opening without a knock and a flash of blonde hair was diving into bed with her that she really registered what was going on. Gail wasted no time, climbing on to Holly's bed and pushing the books out of her lap, replacing them with her head which she rested comfortably on Holly's abdomen, her arms wrapped around Holly's hips.

Holly's hands instinctively went to brush through the short blonde strands, scratching soothingly against the other girl's scalp. "Hey, what happened?"

"Bad night," came the muffled reply.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Holly felt Gail shaking her head 'no' against her stomach. "Ok." The med student went back to gently playing with Gail's hair and slowly but surely she could feel the tightly wound body relax against her.

"They all think that I have some kind of advantage, some perks to being a Peck. But it's not like anyone tells me anything anyway. Except be a good cop, you know? Do us proud. It's always the same. But they're a bunch of fucking hypocrites."

Holly didn't say anything. It took her a moment to figure out what Gail was talking about as she had a habit of just making seemingly random comments. She didn't know what to say. The stories she had heard from Steve didn't line up with the things she had seen for herself when Gail was around her family. It was an enormous amount of pressure on the blonde.

"I don't want to be a hypocrite, Holly."

"You don't have to be like them. Just be you, Gail."

"Being me isn't good enough. It's never going to be good enough."

"Yes, it is. You are more than good enough. You're amazing."

"I'm a fuck-up."

"Hey," Holly reached forward and cupped her fingers gently under the pale chin and tilted the other girl's face so she could see the blue eyes for herself. She wasn't sure she'd ever be able to get over how wondrous they were. "You are not a fuck-up, Gail. You are a hard worker who deals with the bullshit life throws her way. But you are incredibly good. If they can't see that, then it's their loss."

"I'm tired, Hols," the blonde sighed. She felt overwhelmed by the gentleness coming from the brunette but she couldn't believe her. Holly may have been one of the smartest people she ever knew but it was hard to believe the compliments.

Holly could see the puffiness and the circles under the blue eyes, that even with makeup were visible this close. She wondered again if the other girl had ever slept well because she certainly wasn't doing so now.

"Do you want to sleep?"

Gail shook her head no then nodded yes. "I don't know if I can."

"You're welcome to try. Want to borrow something to wear?" Gail nodded and shifted so Holly could get up and find some comfy pajamas for her.

"Holly," The brunette stopped what she was doing to give the blonde her attention. Gail scratched nervously at the back of her head. "Ummm if I...if I umm...can't...if I don't stay the night it's not because of you."

Holly smiled warmly at the girl in her bed. "It's okay. Stay as long as you want, but if you don't wake me up before you go can you at least text me when you get home?"

"Yeah, I can do that."

"Good. Why don't you put these on and I'll clear off the bed."

Gail got up and accepted the clothes. She glanced at the bed and the mess of books and papers, including the ones she had pushed out of her. She was hit again with some guilt that Holly was giving up time to comfort her. "You were studying."

"Yeah, but it's okay."

"You can keep studying. The light doesn't bother me." Gail promised. If it wasn't for Chloe, she would sleep with the light on every night, but Holly didn't know that.

"I just need to finish this chapter then I'm calling it a night too." Holly gestured to one of the larger books in the pile.

The blonde left to change this time, not wanting to mess with Holly's concentration and needing a minute to splash some water on her face and trying to shake off a lot of the feelings she felt crawling out of her skin. When she returned to the room Holly had cleared off the bed and had shifted from the middle of the bed to the side she took when Gail was over. As usual she had left enough space that they didn't have to touch if the blonde didn't want to. Her heart felt fuller with the realization of how careful Holly always was with her, despite how reckless Gail seemed to be with both of them.

Gail settled on her side of the bed but turned so that she was facing the brunette.

"Close your eyes, Danger." Holly softly commanded; she smiled when the blonde did as she was told. "Do you want a bedtime story?"

"Is it about princesses and castles?" Gail teased.

"It's about emulsification and lipolysis.

"Ooo even better." Gail cracked one eye open to peek at the brunette beside her to see her reaction and was rewarded with a crooked smile.

"Glad you think so..." Holly started to read the words of the book aloud, figuring that if it could put most of her classmates to sleep, it would work for the girl beside her.

Gail didn't try to fight sleep as it came for her. Instead she focused on voice that was as warm as honey and on the fact that she didn't have to be alone. Not this time.

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A/N: So the next chapter should be up much faster than this one since I'm going to have a little more time to write than I have recently. I also have some special guest characters planned for it...you'll see...and I think it's time to see what happens when Holly faces challenges of her own. Will she turn to Gail when she needs someone?