They had a lovely last dinner in Futaha's care, though the heiress didn't join them. There was a fine spread of local snow delicacies, mostly seafood, and exquisitely cooked winter vegetables.

Sakura felt like she was devouring all of it in a way that was unseemingly, but couldn't convince herself to stop. The entire team was in a fantastic mood. An escort mission without a hitch was one that left you waiting for the other shoe to drop. An escort mission with just the right amount of trouble left you feeling satisfied.

Earlier, Ko apparently knew enough medical ninjutsu to take care of her worst cuts. She sat with her back facing him and tugged her hair over her shoulder. He knelt behind her and passed his hands over her neck as they made quiet conversation.

Kakashi brooded, nose stuck in a cup of sake as he glared daggers at them, mostly Sakura. Even Tenzo didn't feel like riling up the captain, seeing the bad mood that he was in.

When the food was brought in by the butler, Kakashi slammed his glass down on the table and demanded that they start dinner immediately. When Kakashi glared at Ko, he was surprised to find that the Hyuuga was giving him a look of matching anger.

From where she was seated, Sakura could only see Kakashi. She shook her head at him, for being immature and angry because he was hungry. With a small sigh, she seemed to begrudgingly scoot over to the table. Ko stood up and sat pointedly next to Sakura, white eyes locked on Kakashi.

Futaha had offered them as much sake as they wanted. Delicate in flavor, the drinks were undeniably expensive and tasted divine after the trials in the snow.

Two hours into the night, after many drinks already, Kakashi challenged Ko to a drinking contest. Tenzo protested at being left out, but Kakashi insisted with slurred speech that it was only for the men noticed by Futaha Miyamizu. Tenzo had a nagging feeling that that was not at the heart of this challenge, but when he looked over at Sakura to confirm his hunches, she was too busy doubled over in laughter. Her laughs rang out as the two of them pounded drink after drink across from each other at the table.

Kakashi was hazily aware, in the deep back of his mind, that he kept drinking to destroy Ko and to hear one more cry-laugh from Sakura.

Ko was also distracted by the melodic sound of Sakura's laughs. But between drinks, he regarded his captain with something close to anger. Tonight, there seemed to be something at stake for the two of them.

It was late in the morning when Sakura stood up from the table. She was terribly full, drunk, and absolutely exhausted. Pressing a light hand to her forehead, she found that she was dehydrated and still nursing a small fever.

The men on her team looked up at her as she stood, and swayed on her feet.

"I think I need to sleep now, don't stay up too late," she reminded with a breathy laugh, looking at each of them with finality.

Ko smiled back and bid her goodnight. Tenzo did the same. But when she landed on Kakashi, he had only a dark look for her that she was too exhausted to return.

"Good night, captain."

Sakura let herself out of the room without giving him another glance. She didn't trust herself to not get upset in front of everyone else. Sakura shook as she slowly dragged herself up the stairs. Her hands hurt from the cuts and her body felt sluggish from the fever.

Her eyes stung from anger.

Sakura had tried so hard to extend an olive branch to her captain. After the issue at the bar, she'd noticed him thawing. In fact they'd even had a few conversations that she would consider fun or genuine. But from the moment she'd woken up today, he'd been nothing but short with her.

And Sakura was exhausted.

The three men remaining at the table went silent. Ko sent his drink down on the table quietly.

It had been impossible to miss the energy Sakura exuded as she left the room. Her light mood had been shattered instantly when she looked at Kakashi. When Ko and Tenzo turned to their captain's face to see what she'd reacted to, each felt like they saw something different.

Tenzo saw Kakashi angry at how drunk or tired Sakura was. Ko saw Kakashi worried and angry as a result of it.

But they all saw Sakura's happy smile fall into a frown as she turned her head away. The sliding door slammed behind her.

Ko pursed his lips. "Captain," he started.

Kakashi dropped his glass on the table, shooting to his feet.

"You win, Ko." He murmured under his breath as he followed after Sakura.

Footsteps up the stairs told her she was being followed. She trudged forward without turning back. A familiar hand reached her elbow.

"Haruno."

She tried shaking him off. She was too angry to look at him.

"Haruno, I'll help you back to the room."

"And then what?" Sakura gritted out.

He removed his hand. "What?"

Sakura had made it off the stairs, her head pounded and felt hot as she moved down the hallway. At moments, her eyesight felt like it wasn't catching up to her brain.

Still, she had the mind to respond to Kakashi. "—Then you're going to yell at me some more?"

Her hand skirted around the doorframe as she let herself into their room. She fell into her bed, and feebly tugged the blankets up to her chin.

Kakashi stood quietly in the entrance. Sakura could see his hair from where she lay, although nothing else. She closed her eyes. Her head was throbbing.

Finally, she heard the door close. She jolted when she felt a cold hand on her hot forehead.

Kakashi got up and she heard the faucet turn on, the sound of a cup filling. He came back and set the cup on the table with a soft click, and eased a cold towel onto her forehead.

She was burning. He wished she didn't have so much to drink at dinner. It'd been a stressful mission but she couldn't break herself right at the end of it.

"Captain."

Her voice came out clear even as her eyes were shut tightly, eyebrows scrunched in discomfort.

"You can't keep treating me this way. I'm either good enough for this team or I'm not. And if I'm not, let's find you someone who is."

Sakura heard him sigh. Cold fingers wrapped around her bandaged wrist briefly before leaving. She heard him sit down on the other bed before she gave in to sleep.

Kakashi drew his knees up to his chest on the opposite bed. He watched Sakura sleep.

Her breath made her chest rise and fall, her pink hair rustling with the movement. The slim column of her neck was still fully covered with gauze. There was a deep flush across her face from the fever, a hint of shine from sweat. Her pinks lips were parted. Her lashes fluttered with a hint of a dream.

He didn't even know what was going on with himself—how could he explain it to her. Kakashi had been satisfied living his life. He'd been upset when Rin left, but he assumed he was keeping it together well. The team was fine without a medic, he thought they could continue until Rin eventually returned.

The day Tsunade mentioned Sakura Haruno's name was the day trouble began for him. Kakashi had no idea then that he was adopting into his fold one of the most talented medics in the world, and also an incredibly kunoichi who was deeply caring.

At their core, they shared the same philosophy. Kakashi cared more about his teammates than life itself. Sakura apparently felt the same, even willing to go to great lengths for a deeply unpleasant woman like Futaha.

But it was precisely this belief that made it hard to Kakashi to treat her like a normal damn person. He'd been doggedly loyal to Rin for years upon years. She was the one who had left him, but there was no silencing the gnawing feeling of guilt in his chest when he saw Sakura.

It was on so many levels too.

Rin had been his medic since he was a genin. Sakura was the new medic now, and did things differently.

Rin had been one of a few friends with access to his innermost person, but she left. And Sakura had swept in and shown him her entire hand of cards, and more. Sakura's clear, unabashed desire for friendship and true relationships with her team was so foreign to him. It scared him to the core.

Rin had pined after him for years, and part of him had suspected that he felt the same for her. But it took him too long to come around. She'd left.

Kakashi had no idea how Sakura felt about him—other than that he was a cruel captain who mistreated her. But he couldn't deny that she was beautiful, and Genma had put such a desirable idea into his mind that he had trouble shaking it out.

The same way that Sakura was open with her emotions made it hard for him to be. Talking to someone like her, seeing the hope and friendship in her eyes, felt like rubbing salt in an open wound. This wound, from the death of Obito and Minato and all of his other friends, had been open for over a decade now.

As his friend, medic, more, Rin had helped clean the wound and stopped it from killing him. But all of the memories with her, knowing how Obito felt about her, kept that wound open and raw. Just having Rin around was a reminder of the past.

Kakashi was a glutton for punishment.

He threw his hands through his hair. When Sakura first joined the team, he would have given anything to trade her for Rin. What made one medic return to Konoha, and another decide to leave?

Now he wasn't so sure. Sakura was a stunning presence. She stole his breath every time she laughed, and drove him fucking insane when she flirted with Ko. The way he could see right through her and know what she was thinking made him feel good. Hopeful, too.

He wanted to believe that there was something next, not just something that used to be.

Kakashi replaced the towel on her forehead. He gently wiped the sweat from her face.

He sat on the bed and watched her until the sun had come up.

When Sakura woke, she felt something between anger and embarrassment. The memories of last night came rushing back like a cruel nightmare. This was twice now. She twisted her lips in displeasure and squeezed her eyes.

"Why are you crying, Haruno?"

Her eyes shot open. Kakashi was looking right at her.

"I'm not," she croaked.

"Don't believe you." Kakashi stood to grab the towel off of her forehead, and wrung it out in the bathroom before coming back.

He knelt in front of her and carefully felt her forehead. Then he wiped her face before placing the towel back where it was.

The proximity and intimacy of it all made Sakura dizzy. Her throat was parched, her head still hurt, and Kakashi smelled something like wood and trees and his eyes were focused so intensely on her.

"Captain… I need time to myself." She whispered.

Every nerve in his body wanted to stay kneeling in front of her. She looked beautiful with her hair splayed around her on the pillow. He wanted to talk to her. He forced himself to stand.

"I've been doing this all night, but I guess it's time for the real medic to take over," he said with a small smile. Kakashi nudged the water on the bedside table closer to her before grabbing a change of clothes and leaving the room.

Sakura stared at the spot where he had been, just inches from her face.

Futaha had breakfast with them that morning. In order to eat, they all had their masks off, and the heiress was happily ogling between Ko and Kakashi, who were both blushing.

Sakura found Futaha's gaze a few times too. At this point, Futaha was deeply attached to her new friend. She had insisted on sitting next to Sakura, and spent much of breakfast spooning food into her bowl.

Sakura had trouble looking at Kakashi during the meal. He seemed to be in a brighter mood than usual, despite looking more tired, with dark circles under his eyes and particularly unruly hair. Kakashi kept up the conversation, even asking Futaha a few questions about herself.

Sakura also couldn't get herself to look at Ko. She could feel his gaze on her face at various points during the meal. She wondered if it was judgement he looked at her with, or curiosity, or betrayal. The Hyuuga had made his feelings more than clear, but Sakura kept getting into arguments with his captain. Did that put him in a bad place?

The only safe places for Sakura to put her eyes were reliable Tenzo, sultry Futaha, and the delicious spread in front of them.

They gathered outside the villa when it was time to leave. Their packs sat on the ground as they went through the necessary goodbyes.

Mostly, it was Futaha fawning over Sakura. The heiress hugged her multiple times, making her promise to write.

"But you don't know my name," Sakura stated simply. "And this isn't how I look."

Futaha smiled knowingly. "Silver-hair friend shouted your name in the middle of the storm."

Sakura stiffened a little. She felt Kakashi's eyes on the back of her head but didn't turn around. Futaha leaned in for one more hug, clutching Sakura to her close and kissing her on the cheek.

The heiress moved on to hugging all of the men, starting with Kakashi. Tenzo was next, who blushed a deep crimson at the unusual amount of attention he was receiving.

Sakura leaned against the wall, watching the scene fondly. It was clear that Futaha would miss them, even if it was for varying reasons. Sakura almost didn't notice Kakashi, who had also positioned himself against the wall, a few feet away.

"How are you feeling?" He softly asked, eyes trained forward.

"Tired."

"Maybe you should take it easy," Kakashi didn't expect her to answer, but waited a perfunctory amount of time before continuing.

"I'm sure Ko or Tenzo would be happy to carry you too. My offer stands too, of course."

Sakura finally turned to look at him. Kakashi looked peaceful as he watched the scene in front of them. There was no bite, scorn or irritation in his expression. Sakura felt confused.

She swept through a check of her vitals. While she'd healed up all of the remaining cuts this morning, her fever still hadn't broken. She felt tired on her feet already.

Futaha was clutching onto Ko, much like when they first escaped from the battle. She looked deeply into his, admittedly beautiful, eyes. Sakura couldn't hurt her Futaha's feelings by asking for a piggyback ride from one of her favorites. She beckoned Tenzo over.

"Tenzo, could you give me a ride today? My fever, it's still—"

Tenzo looked surprised but agreed before Sakura could even finish. She didn't miss the way that he looked over at Kakashi, reading his face for a reaction.

"I'll take your bags," Kakashi offered, and picked up Sakura's without waiting for a reply. He led the way off of the porch as Sakura ambled onto Tenzo's back and latched her arms around his neck. Ko peeled Futaha off, and picked up his own pack to follow.

As Sakura turned her head to wave goodbye to Futaha, who was beaming at her from the villa, she couldn't help but catch Ko's gaze too. The Hyuuga had an expression that was a little bit hurt, inquisitive and confused. She tore her gaze away and rested her head on Tenzo's shoulder.

Sakura only woke again when they stopped for the night. Tenzo had settled her onto a soft futon without waking her, but it was the sensation of a cold towel on her forehead that finally did.

Sakura's vision was bleary as she took in her new surroundings, yawning. She stretched her muscles under the heavy blanket that someone had drawn over her. This room was humble compared to the ones Futaha had rented for them. Mostly wood, and there was another futon a couple feet away. Then, Kakashi.

He was squatting near her feet, nose buried in a small book that wrapped in a homemade paper book cover. On the front of the book cover, he had scrawled his name in pen.

KAKASHI HATAKE.

Even in her anger with him, Sakura couldn't help but laugh at this unusual tic. Avid reader, she bookmarked for later.

He instantly reacted to the sound, and quickly stuffed his book away in his vest. He shuffled closer to her, still in a squat, and watched her expectantly.

"What were you reading?" she whispered, her voice hoarse.

He looked torn, "I can't tell you."

Sakura gave him an odd look. She reached up to feel at the cool towel, mussing it into her forehead. The sensation was soothing and eased her headache.

"Did you really do this all night?" She asked, remembering what he had said that morning.

Kakashi nodded. Sakura held his gaze, surprised that he wasn't turning away or looking scornful. He didn't look remorseful either, which Sakura was glad for. She had a habit of forgiving people at the slightest sign of upset and she didn't want to let go of this—yet.

"Hatake-san," she rasped. "I really can't keep doing this."

Kakashi stiffened. She wasn't calling him 'captain'. His eyes got darker as he leaned in a little closer. "Doing what?"

She adjusted, wincing at the ache in her body. When she was settled again, she spoke. Her voice stayed at a whisper, unable to muster anything louder. "Feeling like I've done something wrong."

Something akin to relief washed through his body, so strong that he almost fell back ont his heels. His mind turned as he thought about what he could say to that.

Seeing as he wasn't talking, Sakura continued. "You need to tell me what I'm doing that bothers you. I can't read your mind."

"Haruno," he cleared his throat softly. "I was bothering myself."

Sakura's head pulsed. At a certain point, she was going to run out of patience for these creatively vague explanations. She waited for him to continue.

"I would apologize but you've heard too many of those from me." Kakashi's eyes darted around the floor before finally finding hers again. His brow was furrowed, lips drawn down in one corner. It was the most upset, but not angry, that she had ever seen him.

Sakura couldn't understand why.

He opened and closed his mouth several times. "I'd like to get to know you better."

Kakashi trailed her down the stairs to dinner, keeping close steps behind Sakura as she maneuvered down the stairs.

When Sakura entered the dining room, Tenzo and Ko swiveled with broad smiles to greet her. It has hard to miss how excited they were to see her. Tenzo, with some foresight, scooted over to let Sakura sit next to him.

Kakashi and Ko were shoulder to shoulder on the other side of the table.

Sakura could feel both of their eyes on her face. Their expressions, full of different emotions, made her feel pinned on the spot. She couldn't hold down her flush. Sakura really didn't want this attention, right now, from the both of them.

She still felt confused about her opinion of Kakashi, and what to do next. Her head hurt when she thought about trying to be open with him and possibly getting snapped at, again.

Then there was Ko. Ko was unerringly kind to her, had always been. She knew it was in part because he saw something more than just friendship with her. His care and attention, hot like a bright sun, was something she didn't have the energy to address right now. She knew he felt confused by how quiet she had been, and how she had picked Tenzo to help her.

Sakura felt stuck between two great forces of hot and cold. She shook her head into her rice and kept her eyes down.

"Kakashi," Tenzo groaned. "No more missions to Snow in winter, alright?"

The captain snorted and threw a bite into his mouth. "There aren't exactly a ton of missions right now."

Tenzo shook his head roughly, "Peacetime is bad for our profession."

This got Sakura to laugh under her breath. Tenzo heard her laugh and grinned at her.

"Sakura-san, what was it like traveling with Tsunade and Shizune?"

She chewed on her chopsticks in thought, humming. She spoke quietly.

"It was… tough. I was really homesick at first. I met Tsunade because she was the one treating treating my teammate Yosuke. After he died, she agreed to take me in. But she was tough to crack, I couldn't understand the harsh ways she'd show her feelings."

Sakura stared at Kakashi's bowl as she said this. A nagging feeling told her this was a similar situation.

Ko quietly admitted. "Tsunade-sama is scary."

Sakura laughed hard at this. Even Kakashi couldn't help the smile that crept up his face.

"She's a character. But she and Shizune became like my family. When I was gone, I especially missed my brother, Kyuta, here at home."

"I felt terrible for leaving, he was only fifteen then. But I wanted to train under Tsunade so I could take better care of him, and everyone on my teams." Sakura finished with a blush, smiling at her teammates.

"People have all kinds of reasons for leaving home," Kakashi contributed. He held her gaze.

When she made to retire for the night, Kakashi followed her. The man had no sense of personal space as he tailed her up the stairs and into the room. Apparently, he had also decided that they would stay in the same room.

When they were both inside, the stood apart, regarding each other. Sakura looked wary. Kakashi kept outwardly calm, even neutral. But in his chest, his heart pounded loudly. Kakashi was something fiercely avoidant when it came to conversations like these.

"Why are you following me?"

An old interrogation technique that Ibiki taught him told him to keep his mouth shut when he didn't want to reveal something critical.

"Is it because you're worried about me?"

He gave a curt nod.

She sighed and fell onto her futon. Kakashi paralleled her exact posture on the opposite one. He didn't wear his hitai-ate to dinner. She wondered if he used his sharingan to mimic her movements.

"We're going to try to be friendly?"

Another nod.

"Tell me something about yourself."

His mouth felt dry, his tongue was sandpaper. He would have had more to drink at dinner if he knew they were going to have to talk. He should have seen this coming—he cursed himself for being a shit strategist. "I like to read," he croaked.

She broke out into a small grin. His shoulders relaxed at the sight of it. "Cute book cover, you'll have to teach me how you made it sometime."

"Sure, if you bring me a book."

"What's your favorite thing about yourself?"

Kakashi stared at her for a long time. He looked everywhere on her face, but never away. His hand is fisted tightly in the duvet.

He gave a small, firm shake of his head.

"Favorite thing in other people then?"

This time he opened his mouth more willingly. He heard an echo of Minato as he spoke. "When they care about other people."

He didn't miss the way her eyes opened wider, letting in more light to her bright green irises. She looked at him with an inscrutable expression.

"What's yours?"

"The same."

Author's note:

This is the last chapter before my hiatus! I'll be back with the next chapters in something from a month to two months from now. Thanks so much for all of your feedback, love and attention to this story so far! You know I read every review and it brings me joy to see every new bookmark and favorite.

The question I had last chapter about fluff still stands. I'm excited to share with you what I have next. See you after the jump!