Sofie knew the exact moment she began to like Ben Solo.

It was the night that she discovered that her father had died-or rather, had been murdered . The day had been normal, Master Luke had gone with Ben on another mission, but as soon as they came back, everyone knew something was different. Their greetings were hasty. A sense of dread surrounded both of them.

This left Sofie feeling uneasy while she and the other students assisted with the after-mission tasks. Master Luke stopped by briefly while she was helping clean the inside of the ship.

"Can you stay a bit later today, Sofie? I need to talk to you." Master Luke asked her.

Sofie worked longer than the others, and once she was satisfied with her work she visited Master Luke in his study. She made her way to the main temple and sat down in his office. She could sense unease in the air.

"Sofie, I'm sure you knew the basic details of Ben and I's mission today?" Luke asked her. She nodded, a pit resting in her stomach.

"Then you know it was on Nexa. We saw and heard about your family." It felt like Luke was looking straight into her soul. "We heard that your family had been pushed out of their home and that nobody knew where they were. But they told us that your father, unfortunately, had died."

Sofie felt her eyes getting misty and her stomach turning. "Do they… know what happened?" She asked Luke.

"They believe he was killed by someone with intentions to take over that area." He replied, his face refusing to show emotion.

"I'm sorry," was all he could say.

Sofie took a deep breath and wiped a tear from under her eye.

"What am I supposed to do now?" She asked out loud. "The whole reason I wanted to train- to become even somewhat skilled was for my family, for Nexa." Her voice cracked.

Her family was part of a successful line of politicians. They had enjoyed having influence and stability, but due to the overall prosperity of Nexa, they were frequently targeted by ill-meaning groups.

"You can stay here indefinitely, and remember you are young. Perhaps the Force has other plans for you, and it knows that 18 was too young to bear that responsibility." Luke said to Sofie, a pain finally appearing in his eyes.

"I'm sorry."

As soon as Sofie exited Luke's study she began to feel numerous tears running down her face. Her face was red and warm with emotion, but as she stepped outside she found the cool wind calming as it enveloped her body.

Just outside the temple was a figure holding a lantern. Sofie jumped backwards in fear and surprise, eyes blurry with tears.

"Sofie- it's me, Ben." Ben said, holding the lantern closer to his face. "Master Luke talked to you, didn't he?"

Sofie nodded as she wiped her face, attempting to dry it and pull herself together. "He did. He said he was sorry and that I could stay here indefinitely, even though what I wanted to do was go back and use what I learned to help them." Sofie crossed her arms.

"I wanted-no, they needed help," she started, "so that something like this wouldn't happen. This is exactly what I wanted to prevent." Sofie sighed. Ben moved closer to her, his lantern lighting both of their faces with a warm glow.

They shared a respectful moment of silence.

"We were there," Ben said softly. "But we were too late. Everyone was already gone, except him and those… soldiers." Sofie looked at him, slightly confused.

"Are you saying… did you both… see my father die?" She asked with hesitation in her voice. Ben nodded, a look of pain across his face.

Sofie buried her hands into her face and sobbed loudly. Ben looked around nervously and touched her arm.

"Wait, don't cry. I- don't tell Master Luke this but-" Ben hastily put his hand into one of his pockets and pulled out something. Sofie looked into his outstretched palm. He held a gold compass pendant and a gold, engraved ring. Sofie looked at him, shocked.

"I managed to loot him before anyone else did," he said, chuckling softly. "I just… I was there and I knew that it was your home and you probably… wouldn't get to go there or see him again."

Sofie gingerly took the items from his hand. "Thank you, Ben," she said softly.

He looked at her with kind eyes. She smiled genuinely at him despite the tears that stained her face. Any rumors of Ben being remotely dark were now untrue to her.

Ben offered to walk her back to her hut, she obliged and was glad to not be walking aimlessly towards her hut's light in the dark.

While walking she told him about how what had happened was always a fear in the back of her mind. She told him about how Imperial-like invaders had been the main reason she even had the opportunity to train at the Jedi Temple. The stress of her and her sisters possibly being attacked or kidnapped had caused a Force-related act of defense from her.

Their walk was long enough for Sofie to explain her brief story. Once they arrived at the hut they exchanged goodbyes.

"Thank you again, Ben." She said.

"Anytime." He replied.

Sofie barely slept that evening, despite a feeling of exhaustion, she couldn't stop her mind from replaying numerous thoughts.

Once the sun rose she looked closely at the things Ben had given her.

The more she looked at them, the more she recognized them. The gold ring he had given her was primarily for fashion, but was simple and broad. Small, cursive text was inscribed inside the ring. It read, "truth and justice, always." She smiled and rolled her eyes. Her father always loved saying that, especially to her and her sisters. She figured that he thought he sounded poignant, but it was a cliche, especially since he was a Senator. How truthful and devoted to justice could he really have been?

The pendant was something that Sofie recognized as belonging to her mother. She wasn't sure how her father had acquired it, she assumed there had been a quick separation between them before her father passed, since her mother had supposedly gotten away with the rest of her family.

She ran her finger across the star in the middle, feeling its ridges. Admittedly, she had been closer to her father than her mother, but she could sense her opinions changing.

Sofie jumped slightly as her roommate rustled in her sleep. Sofie quickly looked around the room, trying to think of where she could put the pendant and ring. She knew that if found, they would likely be confiscated in the name of asceticism.

She decided to stuff them into her pillow for now. If not expertly hidden, hidden in plain sight had to be also sufficient.

Sofie's roommate rustled again, and this time opened her eyes.

"Good morning, Voe." Sofie said. Voe mumbled something back and turned over on her side.

Sofie decided that even if Voe wasn't willing to get up, she might as well since she knew sleeping was not an option.

Sofie quickly got into her Jedi robes, put on her boots and quietly exited the hut

She stepped outside and chilly air hit her skin instantly. The dew still on the grass shone in the sun. The hills were blanketed with fog, and she stared past them.

In the distance she thought she saw a figure. She blinked her eyes a few times to make sure she wasn't seeing things. Granted, it wasn't extremely early and people would be getting up soon anyway, but she was still surprised.

Sofie decided to make her way towards the main building to be first for breakfast. The figure followed her still, but she made it to the building first.

Once inside, she was captivated by the silence compared to outside. She decided to sit at a table closer to the wall.

She slumped into the chair and took a moment to herself. Feelings of yesterday's events rushed her mind and she felt a headache coming on.

Then, the doors to the building opened. Sofie jumped and quickly turned her attention towards the entrance.

It was Ben, again.

"That's the second time you've scared me, just so you know, Ben!" She said to him from across the room. She thought she saw him give a small smile from afar.

He sat across from her at the table. "How did you sleep?" He asked her.

Sofie shrugged. "Honestly, I couldn't stop thinking last night so I didn't get much sleep. Otherwise, I'd probably still be sleeping right now." She rubbed her eyes and resisted a yawn.

"Maybe you could ask Master Luke for the day off?" Ben inquired. "So you can sleep more, and you know… process."

Sofie smiled in consideration. "I might try that, thanks for the idea. But anyway, enough about me, how did you sleep?" She wondered if he always got up this early.

Ben looked towards the ground. "Not really that well either." He said, seemingly stopping himself short. Sofie looked at him, slightly puzzled.

"Did something happen?" She asked him, sitting up towards him. "You can tell me, you've listened to me, the least I can do is also lend an ear."

Ben smiled meekly. "Honestly, I probably shouldn't tell you. You might blackmail me."

Sofie stared, going through all the things it could possibly be in her mind. She laughed slightly.

"Ok, but then don't tell anyone I'm keeping the things you gave me in my pillowcase." She gave a wink.

Ben also laughed. Then the room became quiet. Ben debates telling Sofie about the fight he and Master Luke had last night, it wasn't a special argument, but the topic always left Ben raw.

"Do you ever… think about the darkness?" Ben started, barely audible.

"I mean… as a passing thought, I guess. But here it's pretty drilled into your head that the light always wins." Sofie said, half still pondering in her head. "What about you?" She asked.

"Pretty often." Ben said. No explanation. "But I think you're right. Here it's the light or the dark, no in between."

They shared a slightly uncomfortable silence.

"Well don't worry." Sofie started. "Listen to what your heart says. You've been so kind to me, and I can tell you're a great person. I'm sure you'll just know."

The conversation stopped as breakfast finally started.

Sofie's emotions stabilized as the weeks went on. Obviously, things weren't good all the time, but she found herself in moments that were freeing. Where the status of her family, or even of herself, didn't matter. She was focused on the Force and her studies.

Sofie walked again to Luke's study. It was time for the monthly check-in. He liked to do it with all students to gauge where they were at and if they needed a bit of a realignment to get back on track.

"Sofie!" Luke greeted her as she entered the small room claimed as Luke's study. "Please, sit down."

Sofie sat in one of the wooden chairs. Luke also sat at his desk, he pulled out his notebook, ready to take notes.

"It's been a while since Ben and I went on that mission where we had that encounter with your family. How have you been since then?" He asked, jotting down a quick note.

"I've been doing better, not amazing, but definitely better," Sofie started. "It's been helpful to have something to focus on and distract myself with."

"You're still taking the time to meditate on it as well?" Luke asked her. She nodded. "Good," he said. "Don't forget to take the time to process."

"Something that's surprised me has been how nice everyone has been," Sofie commented out loud. "Voe is always asking if she can do anything for me and always asks if I want to go on random walks." Sofie smiled to herself. "Ben too, I think because he went on the mission he was also affected by it. We chat all the time and he's like Voe, always asking me to do random things."

Luke perked up slightly. "That's good to hear that the other students have been helping you as well." He paused to think for a moment.

"Tell me, what do you think of Ben? Do you think he's a good student?" Luke asked, putting down his pen briefly.

Sofie nodded, "yes, I think he's a good student. He's clearly talented. Voe won't stop talking about how she wishes she had 'strength' like him."

She wouldn't admit it to Master Luke but she had also found him incredibly cute. She always noticed the way he held himself and the way his dark, wavy hair settled around his face. But it was his acts of kindness, strength, and company which had caused her to make up her mind.

While Luke carefully calculated his next question she felt her face become warm. Sofie tapped her foot nervously as she felt her face.

"Tell me, Sofie, do you think that Ben shows any qualities that would make you think he was heading towards the dark?" Luke asked slowly. Sofie blankly stared at him, the numerous conversations that she and Ben shared replaying in her mind.

Ben didn't necessarily have any qualities that told her conscious to stay away, but he did share thoughts about thinking about the topic fairly frequently and they seemed to disturb him just as much as anyone else.

Sofie put on her thinking face. "I don't think so, he's really kind to me and others."

It felt like Master Luke was staring into her soul, but she resisted the urge to break eye-contact, knowing it would make it more obvious she was telling a half-lie.

"Listen, Sofie. I can tell you and Ben have gotten pretty close. You're pretty good friends now." Luke began. He closed his notebook and clasped his hands together. "This should stay between you and me," he paused.

"I have been sensing some troubling things inside Ben, and I know it might not seem obvious to you." Luke sighed. "He is talented, perhaps too talented for his own good, but there's something... different."

Luke paused. It pained him to say such things about his own nephew, but he could sense a growing closeness between him and Sofie. He feared it was only a matter of time until the situation imploded, and if he could move her out of the crossfire, it was a win for him.

"I know you're friends, but I encourage you to slowly make some distance, for your own safety." Luke finally said.

Sofie bit the inside of her lip. She nodded slowly.

"I understand." She said. Luke smiled at her.

"Good, thank you." He changed his dementor instantly. "Well, other than that I think you are doing great. I understand that the situation with your family might have dampered your progress, but I've only seen you improve since then." Sofie smiled and stood up.

"Thank you, I hope I can keep that trajectory going." She began her way to the door, trying not to seem hasty.

"Stay safe." Luke said, waving her on.

The advice, that might be better described as an order, that Luke had given to Sofie was easier said than done. There were only about 30 students of varying ages at the Jedi Academy, and Ben and Sofie had already become closer, which made it natural to talk and sit near each other.

Sofie tried to get closer to her roommate Voe and meet some of her friends. Being in a group made it more difficult for Ben to interject and join.

But really, it didn't feel right, and Ben must have had the same feeling as well.

Sofie tried to make sure that she never walked alone, because as time passed she could sense the confusion and hurt growing in Ben. However, another part of her was relieved, because it seemed like he wasn't very confrontational.

"Can you walk with me to the library?" Sofie asked Voe one night when they were both in their hut.

Voe groaned. "I'm actually cramping right now, so not tonight. Sorry Sofie." She turned onto her side and held her stomach.

"Ok, I'm sorry, I hope you feel better." Sofie said. She headed to the library anyway. It wasn't like there was real danger out there. Master Luke had made a suggestion, and she had been following it.

The walk to the main building was uneventful. Sofie breathed a sigh of relief as she entered the building. There were some students in the main room, chatting over open books. She waved towards them, they waved back.

She headed upstairs to the library. The entire top floor of the building was dedicated to the minimal books they had on Jedi Teachings and history, data-tapes, and filmsi. The rest of the room was more of a general study area.

Once in the library she headed to the Jedi teachings section. She scanned the shelf for the book she was looking for.

"Jedi Teachings… Jedi Teachings…" she said under her breath.

She began to reach for a book but was stopped short when she felt a tapping on her shoulder. She gasped and quickly turned around, bumping into the shelf in the process.

"Sorry," Ben said. Of course it was Ben. Sofie took a deep breath.

"It's ok, I just didn't think anybody else was up here." Sofie looked around the room anxiously, knowing what was probably next.

"Can I… talk to you?" Ben asked her sweetly. She bit her lip. She wasn't going to say no, she couldn't say no.

"Sure." She said, she followed Ben to a table that was slightly hidden in the corner of the room. He had a couple of books and various papers laid out on the table.

They both sat and seemed to both be waiting for the other to start.

Finally, Ben started.

"Have you been avoiding me?" He stated bluntly. Sofie rubbed her arms anxiously.

"I— I maybe have. But it wasn't my choice." She said. Ben looked at her, confused.

"Master Luke told me to, he said it was for my own good." She continued. "He said to just try and put some distance between us." Sofie looked down on the ground, avoiding eye contact with Ben. She could feel her face getting warmer by the second.

"I know that he's afraid of me- or rather afraid of what I can be." Ben said. "But I haven't actually done anything." He continued, Sofie sensed a slight shaking in his voice. "He acts like I can control every thought and voice in my head. Like everything that he does is beneficial for me."

She looked at him, her heart aching.

Ben stared at her back, trying to hide the emotion from his face.

He didn't know why it had hit him so hard, her ignoring him.

Maybe it was the consistency of the theme in his life. Since his birth, he had been surrounded by people who were supposed to be close to him, but became preoccupied with other things. His mother, who had a strong career as a Senator and general, had sent him off, but was it because she had no time, or did not care about him?

Did his father move erratically across the galaxy because he could not help it, or because he did not care for Ben?

And now he had made a good friend, who had once again pulled away. It was almost like his uncle, mother and father wanted him to be in isolation. He felt a deep resentment.

Sofie held her hand out on the table.

"I'm sorry," she said.

A voice echoed in Ben's head.

' If you don't hold onto her now, she'll go,' The voice said. 'Then you'll be alone again. The Skywalkers have already shown you their true colors.'

"I should have realized that there's a difference between reality and what Master Luke says." Sofie continued.

Ben held her hand tightly and gave her a smile.

"Will you stay here with me?" He asked her.

She nodded and went to get the book she originally came to get. They studied together in silence until the stars had shifted their positions in the sky.