It was a normal day in the Gryffindor common room. Or, as normal as you could get with wizards. Around the room, there were people lounging around by the fireplace or playing Exploding Snap while in the background you could hear the twins off playing some prank or another. In a dark corner of the room, you could see the hunched back of Hermione Granger as she furiously penned down a 2 foot essay. Nearby, the lanky figure of Ron Weasley stood bugging her.
"Come on, Hermione, just tell me if this essay is okay." Ron said urgently said, poking her in the shoulder. "Come on, come on, come on."
The girl was almost screaming in frustration. "Fine!" she snapped, grabbing the paper. "Give it to me!"
Hermione took a deep breath and started reading the paper. She paused. "Ron," She said slowly. "This is an essay for Herbology, not Potions."
Ron's mouth dropped. "What?" he complained. "But I spent 2 hours on this stupid thing!"
The girl simply rolled her eyes. "Well, there's no crying over spilt milk."
Ron cocked his head to the side, puzzled. "But, I didn't spill any milk." He said.
"It's just a muggle saying." She said dismissively.
"Why would there be any spilt milk though?" he questioned. "And why in the world would I cry about it? I could just use Scourgify or something like that."
By now, she was gritting her teeth. "It's. Just. A. Saying."
Ron, wisely sensing not to bother her anymore, backed off to go find Harry.
The next day…
"Hey, Hermione! So, I was wondering about that milk thing…"
Two days later…
"I thought it sounded so funny you know?"
A week later…
"Do you have any more? Muggles can be so weird."
A month later…
"Hermione—"
"What?" She yelled in frustration. "If this is about the idiom again then so help me, I will hex you right here!"
Ron backed away slightly. "Er, I was only going to ask if you wanted to come to Hagrid's hut with us. By the way, what's an idiom? Sure sounds like idiot to me."
Hermione took a deep breath and rubbed her temples. "An example of an idiom would be the milk thing I told you about a month ago." She heaved a deep sigh. "Let's just go to Hagrid's now, okay?"
Ron agreed, and they left through the Hall together. As he glanced over at her, he saw her writing quickly on a piece of scrap paper. It was only until they reached Hagrid's hut that she finished, shoving the paper into his hands. At his questioning look, she explained.
"So you won't bother me anymore."
Glancing down, he could see Hermione's normally neat writing cramped into the tiny space.
'Idioms
Drive someone up a wall- annoy someone
Cock and Bull Story- unbelievable tale
Chow down- to eat
Feeding Frenzy- an aggressive attack on someone as a group
Dry run- rehearsal
Foam at the mouth- to be enraged and show it
Funny Farm- mental building
Get up on the wrong side of the bed- someone who's had a horrible day
Great minds think alike- intelligent people think like each other
Lost his head- angry and overcome with emotions
Hit the books- To study for a test
Piece of cake- something that's easy
NOW STOP BOTHERING ME! OR ELSE!
-Hermione'
Ron grinned in glee. These sayings were so interesting. And it also solved the problem of getting his father something for his birthday too!
Later, as Harry, Ron, and Hermione walked back from their visit to Hagrid with their pockets significantly heavier than usual from his rock cakes, they encountered Draco and his posse in an abandoned hallway.
"Malfoy." Harry spat immediatly, scowling at him.
Ron glared angrily. "Yeah, what the hell do you want?"
Hermione also stepped forward menacingly, although it didn't work quite as well as she intended, seeing as she was the shortest out of their lot. "Move out of our way." She said.
Draco sneered at them. "Well, if it isn't Pot head, Weasel, and the Mudblood." He drawled.
Harry bristled angrily as Ron glanced down at his hand. "You're driving me up the wall, Malfoy."
...
...
...
The silence was almost tangible as everyone stared at him.
Ron continued, consulting the sheet of paper again. "I think you woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I can see you foaming at the mouth. You probably lost your head."
Hermione had unfrozen by now and was slamming her head against the wall. Repeatedly.
Harry just looked at bit amused while the Slytherins continued staring at him.
"I think you guys belong in the Funny farm." Ron stated, before sweeping past them. "Come on guys, let's go."
The three of them walked away with Hermione holding onto her sore head gingerly. Back at the hallway, it was a long time before any of the Slytherins moved.
Draco turned to Goyle and Crabbe in amazement.
"I think we've finally driven him to insanity."