Chapter 35: Enemies
BELLA
"It's snowing again."
I looked out our window at Rosalie's glum comment and nodded. I'd felt like for days that a big storm was coming but unlike last year I wasn't terrified by the prospect.
We were as ready as we could be for the heart of winter. Each household had a good stock of canned food and wood for their fireplaces to keep them warm for the winter. Some of the larger houses had generators for the really cold nights. Even the infirmary was as stocked as we could make it.
I turned to find Rosalie taking a large bite out of the leftover pumpkin bread that I'd made with Angela. She hummed and took another bite.
"Thank god the last search party found flour. There's nothing better than a warm corneal biscuit with butter. I guess those smelly goats are good for something," she mumbled and spread more of it on the tiny remains of the biscuit in her hand. "Now, all we need are chickens."
The goats actually had expanded our diet quite a bit. There was goat milk, cheese, butter. On top of that there were all the things that we could make now that included milk in the recipe. Siobhan even went about making goat milk soap.
We had only two sheep, but six goats. Four of the goats were female and two were males. None of us knew much about how to take care of farm animals, except for Mrs. Cope and Esme a little. I worried that they would freeze to death in their barn built by Embry, but Mrs. Cope said that generally if a human could handle the temperature all bundled up, then a goat or sheep could handle it because they grew thick undercoats of cashmere and wool. Sheep and goats actually needed a lot of fresh air and plenty of light to be healthy.
However, one of the males and two of the female goats were underweight and so their undercoats weren't going to be warm enough. So, much to Alice's delight, Mrs. Cope set her and Siobhan to knitting little sweaters for them.
Looking after the goats was constant work because there was a daily routine of feeding, milking, and keeping the straw in their stalls clean. Each household took turns looking after them and in turn they owned the milk produced which they could use in whatever way they wanted. Each goat produced about three litres of milk, which was a fair amount. So often households would trade some of their milk for other things or decide to combine with another household to make some sort of foodstuffs to share.
"The guys will be back before the snow gets too heavy," Alice said as she looked outside at the darkening sky.
Alice was looking tired and a little sad as she stared out at the fading light.
She was talking about Emmett, Ben and Edward. Jasper still hadn't integrated back into the community. I was worried that he never would. Ever since he got back, he'd been paranoid and didn't make any sense when he talked. We couldn't even get out of him who he meant by "they" when he said that "they" were coming. For the first weeks after he returned, we'd manned the walls heavily, expecting to be attacked at any moment. However, after weeks of nothing, people started to relax a bit. We still continued to man the walls in shifts, but with nothing else to go on from Jasper that was all we could do. Most people started to think that Jasper was just delusional and we couldn't take anything he said seriously. His behaviour was strange, but not in a dangerous way because he mostly kept to himself. He spent a lot of his time patrolling the walls and hiding in one of the abandoned houses obsessing over maps.
"Jasper will be okay, Alice," I said, putting my arm around her shoulder and squeezing. "He's probably inside already and we've left him a lot of food."
She sighed and rested her head on my shoulder for a minute.
"He was in our room again last night. I thought for sure that this time he'd pick Clara up. I pretended that I was still sleeping so he wouldn't run away and I'm pretty sure I heard him talking to her."
The relationship between Alice and Jasper was practically non-existent. She said that the only time that she ever really saw him was when she'd wake up to find him sleeping next to Clara's crib. He refused to touch his daughter, but he couldn't seem to stay away from her either. When Alice would try to coax him into holding Clara, he'd get agitated and bolt from the house. Alice seemed to be taking it okay, not great, but okay. Having Clara and new friends seemed to help, but I knew she missed him. We made sure to package food for him every day, so that he'd eat, but often we'd find that he'd only eaten some of it. It was at these times that Alice would dissolve in tears because she wanted her Jasper back.
"Well, that's progress, isn't it?" Rose asked, gently. "At least he's interacting with someone even if it's his infant daughter who doesn't understand a word he says."
Alice nodded, her eyes shiny with tears.
"I just miss him so much. It's like he's a ghost haunting me. I can see him and hear him, but I can't touch him," she said, sadly.
We'd been having problems with other members of the community over Jasper. He was scaring people because he was creeping around the community spying on people. He wouldn't talk to anyone who tried to introduce themselves to him and would often try to hide before anyone had the chance. However, what really stirred up the negative feelings against him was when a few weeks ago he'd had a confrontation with Tyler who had been on guard duty on the wall.
"I was minding my own business and suddenly that fucking psychopath was on top of me with fists flying. He could have knocked me off the platform and killed me," Tyler complained. "Something needs to be done about him."
Tyler said that Jasper attacked him for no reason, but I was pretty sure it was because Tyler had fallen asleep on watch. Edward told me that he'd caught Tyler two weeks ago dead asleep on the guard tower that looked over the wall.
We defended Jasper's behaviour, telling everyone that Jasper had protected us and saved their lives, but people seemed to have forgotten who had gotten rid of the guards holding them prisoners.
Mrs. Cope supported us and shut down anyone who expressed any negative feelings towards Jasper in her presence. She was a great comfort to Alice.
"My husband Henry was like your Jasper. When he came back from the war, he was a changed man. He'd been a kind happy man when I'd married him, but after fighting overseas he became nervous and mean as a rattlesnake," she told us, one night over a cup of tea. "He didn't trust anybody and didn't want us to be around other people. Even though I hated it, he carried a pistol everywhere he went. He'd become so paranoid that he couldn't even stand to have people walking behind him on the street. On the rare occasions when I was able to get him to go out to a restaurant or movie with me, he couldn't sit with his back to the door and every time there was a loud noise, he would flinch. He even assaulted a man who simply asked him for a cigarette and a light. Then, when I'd get upset or even try to soothe him, he would turn his anger on me. He never touched me with anger, but the things he said could turn a person's hair white."
"What did you do?" Alice asked, a sob caught in her throat because it sounded so familiar.
"At first, I didn't say anything to anyone about it. I just thought it was us, our relationship. Finally, at my wits end, I told my best friend whose husband had also gone to war. She dissolved in tears and told me her John was acting the same way," Mrs. Cope said, placing her wrinkled hand over Alice's.
"It helped knowing that someone else was going through it. We cried on each other's shoulders during the bad times, but we never stopped loving our men. I couldn't abandon Henry. He couldn't help what he'd become. It's unfair to tell men to go and kill an enemy and risk their lives in doing it, and expect them at the same time to be kind and gentle all the time.
Eventually, Henry started confiding in me. He'd wake up from nightmares where he'd be inconsolable and during those moments he would share little bits and pieces of his experiences in the war. He told me that he'd killed an enemy once by shooting him at close range. He could see the pain on his face when the bullet ripped through him. The expression on that man's face filled him with shame and disgust for what he'd become. Henry hated burdening me, but talking about it seemed to help and eventually his nightmares became less and he began to trust again. However, it was a long time coming, Alice. And it's going to take a long time for Jasper too, honey. Just don't give up on him."
After that, Alice made an effort to spend a little time with Jasper each day, even if he didn't acknowledge her. She would sit in the abandoned house with him while he paced and obsessed over maps. She wouldn't force him to talk, instead she would read or play with Clara. She wasn't sure whether it was working, but he never ran away and started to eat the food she laid out in front of him.
October ended with our first heavy snowfall. It was a wet snow, soaking into our clothes and leaving us constantly cold no matter how dry or warm we tried to get. Our home had a woodstove that made the cold tolerable. However, the draft had been so bad that we had to tack up thick blankets over the windows and front door to cut down on the cold seeping through the cracks. On really cold nights when the wind began to blow, we slept near the fire, closing up our bedrooms to conserve the heat. With the fire well-stocked, it was quite cozy in our living room. We didn't use the generator often because we wanted to save it for emergencies.
At the end of November, the big storm that everyone was dreading happened. It snowed for four days straight. It was a heavy snow that made it almost impossible to walk any distance. We spent all of our time between our two houses, ours and Ben and Angela's. We didn't even venture to the community house during those days,
Before winter had set in, Embry who had been an architect by trade decided that we should take one of the biggest homes and make it into a community house where everyone could gather. Emmett jumped on the bandwagon with Embry. He'd been working as a construction worker in his father's company before everything fell apart, so the two of them were pretty excited about their project.
A house that was more or less in the center of the community was chosen. At first, it didn't seem like it would fit all 32 of us. Even though many of our community were children, it was still a lot of people. However, all Embry said was, "Trust me. We'll fit."
For weeks, we heard banging and sawing and other random noises coming from the building, but we weren't allowed in until it was finished. The only other person that was allowed inside was Katie who'd decided that she wanted to become a carpenter.
When we were finally allowed in, I was amazed because Embry, Emmett, and Katie had knocked down walls in order to open up the space. Now, the kitchen, living area, an office and what used to be a formal dining room were one big open space. Next to the kitchen, they put a large table that they'd probably gotten from the church basement which could fit about half of our community. Then, around the fireplace they'd placed sofas, recliner seats, rocking chairs, and any comfortable furniture that they'd been able to scavenge from empty houses. That combined with one of the largest generators found on their scavenging trips made it a great place to gather.
I'd asked Embry how he'd been able to change the building so much and he began talking about load bearing walls and other things that I didn't understand. So, I just patted him on the shoulder and said, "Good job" and then went off to find Edward. Katie had tried to explain to me earlier about what she'd been learning about construction, but I couldn't catch on to all the terminology.
With the snow making movement difficult, we had a lot more time on our hands. Without the need to constantly be scavenging for supplies, preserving food, and other things that needed to be done to get our community ready for winter, we had time to get to know each other and fall into a routine.
A committee was formed to deal with the day to day problems that arose when taking care of a camp our size. The committee was made up of Ben, me, Eleazar, Liam who was Siobhan's husband, Mrs. Cope, Arnold Clapp, Carlisle, and Aro Volturi. Edward had come to two meetings and then bowed out.
The meetings were boring and frustrating as hell, but they were necessary. However, Edward couldn't deal with them.
"Maybe I'll be able to sit through the meetings if I bang my head against the table until my brains spill out," he said with an exaggerated sigh. "Do you want me to do that?"
He was being a bit dramatic, but he still had a point. Often simple things that should have taken five minutes to figure out would turn into a half hour argument. A lot of it was because of a power struggle that was happening between Aro Volturi and Ben. Ben had become the de facto leader of our community. Before moving to Elmherst, everyone had been more than happy to let Ben lead, but now that we were settled it was clear that Aro thought he could do a better job.
Aro had been a congressman for his area before the world fell apart and so he felt that he was the most qualified for running a community. He didn't like that decisions in the community were being made by a person under the age of 30 who had no experience running a town. Therefore, Aro challenged Ben on everything from who was responsible for cleaning the community house to the amount of fuel that was being used by different households that had generators.
But one thing that everyone agreed on was that the camp needed structure. People needed a familiar routine that added a little bit of normalcy to their lives. Carlisle felt that some of the people in the community's depression and anxiety would decrease if they were given something to do each day that had a purpose. He thought a good solution would be to start a school to teach the younger generation of our community. Even though that old world was over, Carlisle felt like it was important for the younger generation to learn about where they came from and to be taught practical skills.
Chris, Isaac and Josh Weber, were all under the age of 10, so he felt that it was important for them to be getting an education. Then, there was Seth, Claire, Katie, Victoria, Quil, and Mike that were under the age of 18 who in the old world wouldn't have been out of high school yet.
So, that's how our mishmash of a school came about. In the morning, there were traditional classes of reading, writing, math, and science that the younger people in our community attended. In the afternoons, we had survival classes, including using weapons which was taught by Edward and Eleazar, nutrition and food preparation that was taught by Mrs. Cope and me, knitting and sewing which was taught by Alice and Charlotte, and first aid which was taught by Carlisle. The afternoon classes were open to anyone and most of us decided to go to a lot of them. It filled the time and they were all necessary for the new world we'd found ourselves in.
Angela who had been studying elementary education in university was in charge of teaching the youngest children. It wasn't easy because Chris, Isaac, and Josh had become quite wild since the world ended. Esme became sort of the TA of the class because it was Chris that was causing the most problems.
In the evenings, we often went to the community house where a lot of people gathered. Some nights, we would just hang out and talk, while on others we played games.
Our lives were no longer about simply surviving; we were now a town where we could have a future.
"Shit!" Edward gasped.
I got up off the sofa and made my way to the entryway to find the source of his voice.
"What are you doing?" I asked, coming around the corner, only to be surprised when I didn't see him, only a large fir tree filling the doorway.
"Get the door," Emmett grunted from somewhere behind the mass of green.
I ran to the door and pulled it open as far as it would go and then jumped out of the way as a chorus of grunts and curses accompanied getting the tree completely in the building.
"Ho, ho, ho!" Edward said, dropping his end of the tree unceremoniously on the floor, which caused Emmett and Ben to be nearly yanked off their feet.
He'd never looked more handsome than he did at that moment. His face was flushed with the cold, but his green eyes sparkled under his mop of ridiculously out of control hair. I smiled back at him when a crooked grin spread across his face.
"You got us a Christmas tree," I laughed, throwing my arms around his neck and kissing him, not caring that I was getting stabbed by the tree needles that had found their way into his sweater.
"He didn't do it alone," Emmett grumbled, cursing as his mitten got stuck on the fir tree's sap.
"It was your decision to get this monstrosity Emmett," Ben grumbled, as he pulled off his knitted cap and dusted off the snow. "There were plenty of smaller trees that would have done just fine."
"It's the community tree. It needs to be big," Emmett defended.
And it was big. It was one of the biggest Christmas trees that I had ever seen. It practically filled the entryway.
"The only problem you have now boys is how you are going to get it to stand up," I said, with a chuckle. It was too big and probably too heavy for any kind of tree stand.
They stood for a while staring at the six foot tree, contemplating their problem.
Then, Edward said, "Let's hang it from the ceiling," he said with a victorious smile.
I was sceptical because the ceilings were quite high, but they were confident, so I left them to it.
After plenty of arguing and a lot of swear words, they were able to hang the tree.
The rest of the community was thrilled when they wandered into the building that evening only to find a gigantic Christmas tree in the corner of the living area. The place became a hurricane of activity and noise after that as everyone rushed back to their homes to look for decorations while the children sat at the long table making decorations.
Christmas at Elmherst was the happiest I'd been since the world ended. It wasn't like any holiday I'd had before. There were no expensive gifts, everything was homemade. Even the toys for the children were made from things we were able to find in the community. However, everyone, including the children, were beyond excited. No one had had a reason to celebrate for a long time.
"Merry Christmas, Chris!" Edward said, handing him the present that we'd made for him.
"What's this?" Chris asked, his eyes wide with excitement.
"Just open it, kiddo," Edward said with a chuckle.
Ripping off the cloth that we'd used as wrapping paper, Chris cheered with excitement.
"Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Chris shouted with glee.
Edward, with the help of Emmett, had made Chris a bow and arrow set and I'd knitted a kind of sock where he could keep his arrows.
It was a fun gift, but also a practical one. The children would soon have to start learning how to use weapons and one way for them to do that was to learn how to aim at a target. We'd made ones for Isaac and Josh Weber too.
For his gifts to the children, Embry had made targets for them to practice with and as soon as the snow melted we had plans to get them practising.
Rose made each of the women of the community beautiful necklaces and earrings made out of broken china dishes, reassembled into mosaics. Before the world ended, she'd done it as a hobby and they now made wonderful gifts.
Three or four of the other households gave Edward precious batteries for his electric piano. He'd run out a while ago and we could all see that he missed his keyboard. Now, the air was full of music as Edward went through his entire repertoire of Christmas songs.
For my gift to Edward, I finished knitting a blanket for our bed. His eyes sparkled as he looked at it before leaning into me and whispering in my ear.
"I've just thought of another Christmas present I'll be giving you later, under this very blanket," he whispered low enough that no one else could hear. However, if anyone had been looking, my flushed cheeks would have given us away.
His present to me was a small notebook that contained all of the canning, food preserving, and recipes that Mrs. Cope had been teaching us. It was hard to follow Mrs. Cope's cooking instructions because she'd say things like "just put enough in it until it tastes good." It was very frustrating.
Now, I understood why for the last week, I'd often catch Edward following Mrs. Cope around, much to her annoyance.
Most of the other gifts passed back and forth were practical, but very welcome. They were both things we needed for survival, but also creature comforts that we'd all given up on ever having again.
However, the evening ended at a low point because of a confrontation between Tanya, Edward, and Victoria.
For the most part, Edward had been able to avoid Tanya. We lived on opposite ends of the community and in the evenings Tanya usually stayed home because of her advanced pregnancy. However, there were times like this when she and Victoria couldn't be avoided.
I was surprised when she approached Edward, a present in her hand.
"I wanted to give you this, Edward. You're the only one who would value it as much as I do," she said with a smile.
I found her very disconcerting because on the surface she seemed so unscarred by what had happened to her. Her father and mother had been killed by the very person that many people said she'd been sleeping with. Most people considered that it was either James or Caius that was the father of her unborn child.
When I asked Carlisle about her, he said that he thought Tanya may have blocked out what had happened to her family. He didn't share much more with me, only that her account of past events seemed to skip over the deaths of her parents but everything else remained clear.
I watched her intently as Edward took the present from her hand and cautiously unwrapped it. She smiled at him as he opened it, but I did notice that her eyes seemed slightly vacant, like she wasn't completely present in the moment.
Her gift was a long handled blade in a well-worn scabbard. The minute he saw it, Edward's hand clenched around the handle of the knife.
I looked between them in confusion.
"This is Garrett's. This is your father's hunting knife," he said with a frown.
"Yes. I know you love Dad almost as much as I do-" she began, but Edward cut her off.
"You loved him?" he hissed at her furiously.
She looked at him in confusion.
"Of course, I do. He's my dad…" she responded.
"You're the reason he died," Edward snapped.
Tanya's eyes widened in shock, the vacant look disappearing.
"What?" she gasped.
"Edward, this isn't the-" I began, but he interrupted me.
"If you hadn't flirted with every man at the camp, James would never have killed him. You were the breaking point. Your father was trying to keep you from that monster and you just sat there with his arm slung around your shoulder."
"Edward…" Tanya began, reaching out to place her hand on his arm.
"Don't touch me. Don't you ever touch me," Edward snapped a little too loudly and now the room had gone silent as the confrontation was now made public.
I didn't notice Victoria approach until I heard her voice nearby.
"Here's my present, Edward," she said in her high-pitched child-like voice.
She handed him a small gift that rattled as she pressed it into his hand.
For a few minutes, Edward didn't break eye contact with Tanya. But then, with the feeling of the gift in his hand, he snapped out of it and looked at Victoria in confusion.
"It's not a very exciting gift, but I know that you could always use some," Victoria said with a smile, but there was a hard edge to it.
Edward opened the gift box and stared into it for a few minutes, his face empty of emotion.
"They're the right kind, right?" she asked, draping her arm around Tanya's shoulder. "I remember how you never seemed to have enough bullets for your shotgun at Garrett's camp, especially when it really mattered."
I stood up and walked to Edward's side, not understanding what was happening.
All the colour had drained from Edward's face as he stared at Victoria.
However, before I could reach him, Edward suddenly bolted from the room, dropping the present on the floor.
I got down on my knees and began to pick up the bullets. They were the most valuable thing we had at camp. Ammunition was a constant concern, so I didn't understand why it upset Edward. It was the most valuable gift that any of us had received.
After a few more moments of silence, people began talking again.
After I'd picked up the bullets, I gathered Edward's and my gifts and then headed home.
As I reached the house, I saw a faint light coming from our bedroom window, so I knew that he was home.
When I reached our bedroom, I found Edward sitting on the edge of the bed with his elbows braced on his knees and his head in his hands.
"What's wrong?" I asked, sitting down next to him.
"She's taunting me… Garrett didn't die because of Tanya. It was me. I couldn't defend him when he really needed me because I didn't have any fucking bullets in my shotgun."
I fell silent in shock.
Victoria had just shown us her true colours.
EDWARD
Winter held on for as long as it could, not completely ending until the beginning of March. By that time, we'd depleted most of our food and were starting to think about planting season. With the supply of seeds that the Camden Head people had accumulated as well as our own, we had quite the makings of a productive farm much to all of our relief. It was possible that we wouldn't even need to go on scavenging trips at least for a season.
However, our relief was soon overshadowed by the increase in the zombie population outside of the wall. They seemed to have quadrupled in number, but only on one side of the community. The build-up was on the part that was closest to the least populated part of the community which didn't make sense because there was no sound to attract them.
Ben, Embry, Tyler, Seth, and I left the community walls to investigate. When we reached that part of the wall, we quickly got rid of the group of dead that were pressing themselves up against the wall.
When the final one dropped, we stared at the wall in stunned silence.
"What the fuck is this?" Tyler snapped.
Someone had torn apart animals and their remains were left at the foot of the wall. Their blood was spattered and smeared up the walls, causing the dead to become ravenous. It was clear from the way that it was painted on the wall that an animal didn't do it. An animal also would never have left all that meat.
"Jesus…" Embry said in a long drawn out breath.
"Somebody is messing with us," Tyler growled. "This shit was on purpose."
Seth and I spun around, looking into the woods to see if we were being watched. Tyler was right someone was trying to lure the dead to the community.
"We need to get rid of this," Ben said, reaching down and grabbing a dead rabbit. "Come on, Tyler. We need to bury this stuff."
While Seth and I continued to watch for an attack, Embry, Ben, and Tyler went about burying the remains of a rabbit, a possum, and a small deer. Then, with his bottle of water, Ben started scrubbing the walls in order to remove the blood.
"This is so fucking messed up. Do you think its James? Has he come to get us?" Seth asked, in a voice tight with fear.
"It was either James or Jasper. Take your pick," Tyler snapped.
I spun towards Tyler in shock.
"Jasper? What the hell? Why would you think Jasper would do this?"
"The dude's fucking crazy. Didn't you see him yesterday? He had three of those dead motherfuckers tied up at the front gate," Tyler said.
It was true. Yesterday, I'd come out of my house at the sound of a commotion happening at the front gate.
When I finally made it there, I found around ten people standing on the inside of the fence, looking over the wall.
"What the hell is he doing?" Claire asked, standing a little behind Quil.
"Does he think they're pets?" Mike asked with a frown.
I noticed a little to the left, Aro Volturi looking beyond the wall and then at the crowd.
"Something needs to be done about him," he said, loud enough that his voice carried.
I pushed past them and opened the gate only to come face to face with zombies that had chains around their necks and were connected to the gate. I looked past their rotting faces to see Jasper, staring at them intently as he paced back and forth.
I dodged past the snapping jaws of the dead and approached Jasper.
"Jasper. What are you doing?" I asked, but he didn't seem to hear me.
I got closer to him and tried to get his attention again.
"Jasper? Buddy? What are you doing?" I asked, but my voice fell on deaf ears.
So, I stepped right in front of him and grabbed him by the shoulders to stop his manic pacing.
At the feeling of my hands, Jasper tried to jerk away from me, but I held tight. I wasn't afraid of him. Jasper may have lost his mind, but he was still my family.
"Jasper… Jasper… look at me," I said, but when that didn't work. I let go of his shoulders only to grab his face in my hands and force him to look directly at me.
"What are you doing?" I asked, slowly and clearly.
"Camouflage… camouflage and protection… We need it… It's the only way…" Jasper said, his eyes only meeting mine occasionally.
"We need camouflage and protection, against the dead or the living?" I asked, hoping that he'd be able to answer me this time. I'd asked him many times before who "they" were. They could have been a herd of dead or other survivors both of which were bad.
"Both… both… zombies used as weapons…" he said, although he wasn't looking at me as he said it, so I wasn't sure whether it was really in answer to my question.
Then, his eyes snapped to mine.
"Edward… Edward, we're not safe. We need to leave," he said.
I shook my head. Being behind these walls was the safest place we could be. We'd never be hundred percent safe but now with more people we could fight off any survivors that wanted to take this place from us.
"No, Jasper. We'll be okay. Let's go. I'm sure Alice has supper ready," I said, soothingly. Over the winter, Alice had slowly coaxed Jasper into moving back into their house. She told Bella that he barely spoke with her and never shared her bed, but having him under the same roof made her feel that they were making progress.
"You don't understand. None of you understand," he said with a look of agony on his face.
Suddenly, he let out a roar of rage and shoved me out of the way when he saw three men, cut down the zombies that he'd chained up.
Lunging towards the nearest person who happened to be Arnold Clapp, Jasper punched him hard in the face. Arnold slumped to the ground, blood spilling from his split lip. Then, Jasper turned on Tyler. But this time instead of just throwing a punch, he threw Tyler to the ground and straddled him. I ran after him worried that Jasper meant to strangle him to death.
However, after a good punch in the jaw, Jasper leaned down so that he was practically face to face with him and hissed. "You're useless."
Hauling back his fist, Jasper aimed to punch again, but I grabbed his arm.
"Whoa, whoa, easy there. Let's take this down a notch," I said, yanking Jasper off of Tyler whose nose was bleeding heavily.
"Let's go Jasper," I said, pulling him away from the gate.
"Jasper didn't do this," I said, firmly. "Why the hell would he want to attract the dead to the place where Alice and his baby lived?"
"You never know what's going on in a psychopath's mind. Maybe he's just doing it for kicks," Tyler said with a sneer.
"You don't know what the hell you're talking about," I snarled, taking a step towards him. A sniveling coward like him didn't have the right to judge Jasper.
I looked around at the rest of the group, expecting to see similar looks of distaste aimed at Tyler. However, I was shocked to see some uncertain faces.
Fear did funny things to people. I realized in that moment that it was easier to find a scapegoat than contemplate that there was an unknown danger hunting us.
The beginning of Spring was plagued by fog and rain which kept us in almost as much as the cold. I wanted to spend my days outside working and enjoying the fresh air. It caused a lot of people to be short-tempered and moody because of the cabin fever. I was no exception. One night when I'd been especially grumpy, snapping at Bella for no reason, she actually kicked me out of bed and told me to sleep on the couch. By the next morning, I realized how much of a dick I'd been. Bella forgave me quickly, but she'd made her point. I became more careful about who I projected my frustration on.
It was on one of those days that I found myself moving restlessly around the community house. I'd gotten up that morning in a foul mood, so after a black look from Bella I decided to spend some time away from home.
Trying to distract myself , I stepped over to the bookshelf that had been stacked full of books. Picking one up, I read the title and smiled. It was a historical romance novel that I'd caught my mom reading once. When she'd caught me staring at her from the doorway of her bedroom, she'd turned beet red and told me to go outside and play. I was so curious about why she'd reacted that way that I'd snuck into her room and read a bit of it when she was at work.
I'd been shocked and horribly embarrassed because I'd never read or even thought about some of the things that this book was talking about. I couldn't get the images that I'd conjured up while reading out of my head. For around a week, I couldn't look Mom in the eye because I was afraid that she'd see in my eyes that I'd uncovered her secret.
I bypassed that book, glancing through the other titles and finally settling on a mystery novel that was set on a train.
I'd made my way through a quarter of the novel before I just couldn't handle staying inside any longer. So, I stood up and pulled on my coat, planning to walk the perimeter of the wall. Screw the rain.
I knew that Tyler, Seth, Mike, and Arnold were on watch today. I trusted Arnold and Seth, and maybe even Mike, but not Tyler. He was always quick to complain and didn't take patrol seriously. On more than one occasion, I'd caught him wandering away from his post in order to talk to the other people on watch and I'd even seen him falling asleep in the watch tower.
Ben talked to him about it, but he continued to shirk his responsibility.
Even though I felt happy most of the time behind our walls, I never felt like we were hundred percent safe. There was always danger waiting on the other side of the wall. Just the fact that we needed guards on the wall to keep the zombies away was proof of that. On top of that, there was Jasper's warning. I couldn't discount it just because he was acting strangely. I didn't think that he could possibly be so delusional that he was making it completely up. He'd saved my ass several times and I owed him my trust.
As I passed by, the watch team waved hello, but I didn't stop to talk. I just needed to stretch my legs.
Halfway to the other side of the community, I thought I heard something on the other side of the wall. I stopped and listened for a moment, but there was nothing else. Still, I felt compelled to look over the wall and confirm there was nothing there. Dragging a large piece of wood to the wall, I climbed onto it which gave me enough height to look over it. For a moment, I thought I saw movement on the other side of the road by the tree line. I scanned the area, standing as still as possible and listening carefully for out of place sounds.
However, there was nothing else that happened. No movement, no out of the ordinary sounds. I came to the conclusion that it was probably just an animal or a stray zombie.
However, before I could move on, I suddenly got the strange feeling that I was being watched. I rubbed my hands together and then shoved them into my pockets as the cold wind picked up. At the same time, I surreptitiously looked around, trying to find anyone that may be hiding near me. When I didn't see anything, I glanced up at the roofs of nearby houses and then the trees that towered over me, but I couldn't see anything.
My imagination started to create disturbing reasons for the sensation of being watched and I shivered at the knowledge that any one of those sinister reasons could actually be true.
After a few more minutes of not finding anything, I continued on my path around the wall. Suddenly, I heard what I thought was someone talking a short distance ahead of me. I couldn't place the voice for a moment. But as I got closer, I realized it was Victoria. My senses were immediately on alert. After our confrontation at Christmas, I'd barely seen her. I didn't like the fact that she lived among us. I told Ben about what she'd done and what it meant and he was concerned too. However, he told me that just because she didn't like me wasn't a reason for banishing her from our community. But Ben agreed to get a few people to keep an eye on her.
I didn't know what to do. Should I go forward and take the chance of running into her or should I turn back and take another route? It wasn't unusual for Victoria to wander away from the houses, especially if she had the chance for male attention. After Tanya gave birth to her little girl, Victoria spent more time with the single men of the community. Even being pregnant, Victoria was often hanging off one of the guys. Sometimes it was Tyler, but he wasn't the only one.
As if hearing my thoughts, a male voice too low to understand said something.
Who was she talking to?
I stood still, debating my choices as I tried to hear the conversation, but their voices had gone quiet.
Finally, I decided to forge ahead, but no sooner had I made that decision than I collided with her as she seemed to appear out of nowhere.
As we crashed into each other, I reached out to steady her. She was probably around seven months pregnant now and a little off balance. But the minute my hands touched her, she scowled and shoved me, "Don't you ever touch me," she hissed. "Get out of my way," and then she kept on going.
"Thanks for the apology. I'm sorry too," I snapped sarcastically, but she was already gone.
Three months later, the community was continuing to progress and flourish. Victoria had given birth to a son a month ago that she named Nelson. We didn't see much of him because she still kept herself separate from everyone else except for Tanya.
The crops that we'd planted were growing really well, so our trips beyond the wall were becoming less and less as our gardens replenished our food supply.
But it wasn't long before there were changes closer to home that dampened my positive outlook.
I'd just come in from working in our garden when I heard someone upstairs getting violently ill and crying.
Worried, I ran up the stairs and without thinking shoved the door open to the bathroom.
"Go away, Edward," Bella said as she crouched down next to Angela who was throwing up.
"Angela?" I gasped, taking a step inside. "Are you okay?"
"Get out, Edward," Bella said again, pointing out the door.
Making a hasty retreat, I went in search of Ben.
Later that night after a long conversation with Carlisle behind closed doors, Angela and Ben came over to our house.
Bella made them both up a plate of food as they sat down at the table looking shell-shocked.
"So…" I asked, not able to take the silence any longer.
"Edward," Bella said, jabbing me with her elbow.
I knew that it really was none of my business, but Angela and Ben had become two of our best friends and I was worried.
The looks on their faces were a strange mix of fear and excitement that I couldn't understand.
Bella and I looked at them expectantly, waiting for them to say something.
They looked at each other for a while before Angela gave a small nod to Ben.
Looking back at us, Ben's mouth opened as if to speak and then shut it again. Then, he rolled his shoulders and opened his mouth to speak again, but seemed at a loss for words.
"I'm pregnant," Angela said, quietly.
"What she said," Ben said, looking at Angela and then looking down at the table.
My mouth dropped open in shock.
"What? How? What?" I babbled, shaking my head to clear the confusion out of my head.
"Do I really need to explain "how" to you Edward?" Ben asked, anger flaring in his eyes.
"Haven't you been using the condoms Carlisle gave out?" I asked, incredulously.
"We ran out," Angela said, the hint of excitement starting to disappear from her eyes.
Pinching the bridge of my nose, I shook my head again.
The silence lengthened between us before Angela broke it.
"I've always wanted to be a mom…" Angela said, softly.
"Jesus, Angela. Don't you think that you guys should have been more careful? It's not safe to have children now," I asked in exasperation.
Bella grabbed my arm at the same time as Ben stood up and jabbed his index finger at me.
"Back off, Edward," Ben said, angrily. "We didn't plan this, but I'm not unhappy about it. And to respond to what you said, when do you think would be a better time? When and where will it be safer than what we have here?"
His words pulled me up short. When would it ever be safer?
Bella stood up and walked around the table, pulling Angela into her arms.
"Congratulations, Angela," Bella said. "You'll be a great mom."
Then, she turned to Ben and hugged him too.
I got to my feet and walked to Ben's side.
"I'm sorry, man. I'm just shocked," I said, apologetically.
"You're shocked?" Ben exclaimed, his eyes wide. "I'm the one whose going to be a dad…"
The minute the words fell from his mouth, his legs seemed to give out and he plunked himself back down in the chair. I guess hearing it made it more real for him.
"Holy shit, Ange!" He said, turning towards Angela with wide eyes. "We're going to be parents!"
Angela laughed with tears in her eyes as she threw herself at him, wrapping him tightly in her arms.
I sat back down at the table, my mind sort of blank.
I felt Bella's arms wrap around my shoulders and then gently tug on me, so I stood up and followed her out of the room, giving Ben and Angela privacy.
Before we'd even reached our room, I heard the front door close as they left for their own house.
Once we were in our room, Bella turned to me and said, "Couldn't you have been a little more tactful, Edward?"
"Jesus, Bella. I know, I know… I was an ass, but… God… another baby?"
I loved Clara, but always in the back of my mind I worried. What if we had to leave Elmherst one day? What could we do to protect her? Would having her with us kill us all?
"I just can't believe that they're happy about it. I can't imagine anything worse than bringing a child into this kind of world. Everything could fall apart at a moment's notice and then I wouldn't have to protect just you but also a vulnerable little baby who wouldn't know when it was unsafe to cry," I said, beginning to pace.
I was practically frantic for some reason and I didn't really know why.
Bella had gone silent during my rant and when that hit me I stopped.
When I looked at her, her face was frozen with a look of astonishment and hurt.
I tried to replay what I'd said, not understanding where the hurt came from.
"Bella…" I said, stepping towards her, but she backed away.
"You don't want to have children… ever?" she asked, her voice small.
My breath caught in my throat at the question.
I didn't know what to say. I'd never thought about having a child of my own, let alone having one in this world. Just the thought of it filled me with panic.
"Bella…" I trailed off, reaching for her hand, but she snatched hers back.
"Answer me," she demanded.
"I don't know, Bella. It's too risky to have children with the world full of zombies. I'm not sure if it's a good idea," I stuttered, knowing that I wasn't making it any better.
"Thanks for including me in that decision. We're basically married and you thought it was okay to just make a decision like that about our future without talking about it with me."
"It's not a fucking decision, Bella. It's not like that," I said, shaking my head in frustration. "Will you give me a fucking break? I just spoke without really thinking about it. I don't know what the future's going to be like."
Bella changed into a tank top and shorts which was a clear sign that I was in a world of shit. We rarely slept clothed.
"Bella, come on. Talk to me."
She didn't look at me as she pulled down the covers of our bed and crawled into it, turning away from me.
I stood there for a few minutes, wondering what the fuck just happened. Bella and I never fought like this. We were a team.
"Bella…" I tried again.
"Good night, Edward," she said.
With a sigh, I turned and walked out the door. I knew that she was mad enough that she wouldn't want me with her tonight.
I dreamt that night of children, at first my dreams were nightmares. I dreamt of running from the dead with a tiny bundle tied to my chest. I was frantically dragging Bella with me, tripping as I fell over broken pavement and strewn trash. I was exhausted, but I still clenched Bella's hand tightly while my other hand covered the squirming bundle that was strapped securely to my chest.
"Please don't cry, please don't cry," I begged in my head.
But my prayers fell on deaf ears, as my child let out a whimper and then a loud cry.
"No, no, no," I whimpered as I heard the moans of zombies approaching.
Then, my dream changed and I was in a completely different place.
I saw a little girl who I knew was Clara and a little boy who looked a lot like Ben playing in front of a house I didn't recognize. Instead of feeling panicked seeing them playing out in the open, I smiled and walked towards them. "Daddy!" a little voice cried from the doorway of the house in front of me. I couldn't see my child clearly, but I smiled even wider at the feeling of overwhelming love I had.
"Daddy's home!" I shouted, rushing forward and lifting the little toddler into the air.
Suddenly, I woke with a jerk. I looked around me, completely disoriented. It took me a moment to realize that I wasn't in my bed, but on one of the couches in the community house.
I sat still, wondering what had woken me. It was a noise, something familiar and a smell that I couldn't quite place.
Listening, carefully, I waited and heard it again: gunshots and the cry of 'fire!' That was what I smelled, the acrid stench of burning wood and plastic.
I reached for my gun and jumped up off the couch, hurrying out of the building and towards the commotion.
When I came around the corner of the building, I entered chaos. Screaming, gunshots, and flames surrounded the infirmary and barn. My eyes couldn't seem to take everything in at once.
"Get away! Stop! STOP!" someone screamed and I turned towards the noise.
Quil was backing away with his gun raised, aiming at a person. I went to stop him, but before I had the chance he fired. I looked towards the person that he hit and saw that it was Ruth Weber, Angela's mother. I gasped in shock, but as I raced towards her I saw that she didn't look like herself. And then it hit me, Ruth Weber had been turned into a zombie.
Quil stumbled back after Ruth dropped to the ground and sat down heavily on the grass, a look of shock spreading across his face.
I spun towards the fire that was quickly consuming the infirmary and the barn. I could see immediately that there was no saving them, but what horrified me more was that there was another body lying a little ways away from Ruth's body. It was a small body, too small to be an adult.
My heart nearly stopped, thinking that it was Chris. I broke into a run until I was able to drop down next to the body. I nearly cried with relief when I saw that it wasn't Chris, but then my heart broke when I realized it was Josh Weber.
Just like his mother Ruth, Josh had turned into a zombie.
I jumped to my feet and spun in a circle looking for any other dead, but there was none that I could see.
The heat was intense as people scrambled around me using any container they could find to put the flames out. Then, someone started screaming that there may be people inside the infirmary.
Shouts of "Doc!" and "Carlisle!" could be heard above the roaring of the flames. But to everyone's relief, we heard Carlisle shout "Here!" from somewhere in the crowd.
The roof of the infirmary suddenly gave way, tossing up a cloud of sparks that by some miracle hadn't landed on other buildings surrounding it yet.
Turning towards the barn, I saw the silhouettes of animals running around inside with the orange glow of the fire as a backdrop. Sadness filled me at the thought of the poor animals dying in such a way, but there wasn't any hope of saving the barn.
Suddenly, I saw Bella fly by me, running straight for the barn.
"Oh God, no!" I thought, running after her.
Before I could reach her, Bella had yanked off her jacket and dunked it into a bucket of water and then threw it around her. Then, with the full bucket of water in her hands she ran hard towards the opening of the barn. The front part of the barn was on fire, the doors wide open but quickly becoming engulfed in flames.
"Bella!" I yelled. "Wait! Stop her!"
She dodged past Embry who was in front of the doorway and then threw herself into the barn.
"Fuck!" I screamed and without hesitation jumped over the flames that had begun to block the entrance.
Immediately the scorching heat burned my eyes, which caused me to clench them shut. At the same time, I tumbled to the floor several feet into the building. I struggled to get up, my eyes tearing up from the smoke and the heat.
Through the roaring of the fire, I could hear the terrified bleats of the sheep and goats.
I knew that Bella was there to rescue the animals, so I dashed towards the back of the barn where I knew they'd be as they tried to get away from the heat of the fire.
Ashes were burning at my skin as flaming straw landed on me. Any second the hay would be completely engulfed in flames and then we'd be in serious trouble.
Coughing and wheezing, I shouted, "Bella!"
I couldn't see through the smoke, but I heard her shout. "Over here!" from the back.
By the time I reached her, she already had the youngest goat and its mother in her arms, but the others were frantically dashing around, searching for an escape.
The flames had now completely taken over the front of the barn, blocking our only exit.
The only part of the building that was not on fire was the back of the building.
I looked for any kind of tool that I could use to create a hole in the wood, but my eyes were watering so badly from the smoke that I was blinded.
Then, I heard a sound, a pounding on the back wall and then the crack as boards began to give way.
Through the small hole created, I saw the faces of Emmett and Embry looking in. Then, with a blow from an axe, the hole was big enough that we'd be able to squeeze through.
"Get out of there!" Emmett yelled over the roar of the flames.
"No!" Bella croaked. "The animals! We need them!"
Anger fuelled by fear filled me. How could she risk our lives this way?
I pushed her towards the hole with her two goats in her arms and shouted, "Get her out of here!'
Embry grabbed Bella's arm and bodily dragged her through the opening.
Then, I went about trying to get the animals. Because of their blind panic, they weren't easy to catch. They didn't even stop fighting as I carried them towards the opening that Embry and Emmett had made.
I'd only been able to save three of the goats when Embry grabbed my hand through the hole.
"Edward! The barn is coming down! Get out now!" he yelled.
It hurt to take even the smallest breath, but there were still more animals inside.
As I turned away to get another one, I felt an arm reaching out to grab me. I turned to see that Emmett had come inside to get me when I tried to reach the last few animals that had retreated to their stalls for safety.
Dragging me with him, we reached the hole and other hands hauled me out into the night. I coughed and wiped at my eyes, the smoke and debris burning enough to nearly blind me.
The cool air felt good against my scorched skin as I was carried away from the collapsing barn. I wanted to call out for Bella, but I couldn't stop coughing.
"Edward!"
I turned towards the hoarse voice, finding what I thought was her sitting in the grass away from the collapsed buildings. I could barely see but I fought my way out of the arms of Emmett and Ben and rushed to her side.
Just that small distance made my lungs feel like they were on fire which caused my legs to give out under me.
"Edward," she wheezed, as she threw her arms around me and held me with all her might.
"I am all right, Bella," I groaned, pulling away to survey her injuries. "Why did you do that? You could have died!"
"We need the animals for food," she croaked.
"You are more important than those goats, Bella. It would have killed me to lose you. Do you not understand that? You are more important to me than my own life," I said, wanting to hold her tight to me and scold her at the same time.
I fell silent instead, my emotions too much for me to handle.
"I'm so sorry, Edward," she said, pulling her face away from my chest to stare into my eyes. "I'm so sorry."
I couldn't respond. I was suddenly exhausted and my eyes were stinging, like I'd run sandpaper over them.
It wasn't long after that when Carlisle was at our side, checking first me and then Bella.
"Edward, we need to do a rinse of your eyes. I'm worried about the amount of ash you got in them. Are they hurting?" Carlisle asked gently as he tilted my face up towards him.
I nodded in silence.
"I've got some saline at the house. That's about all I can do. The infirmary is gone along with all of the medicine," he said, almost to himself.
"Carlisle," I said, grabbing his arm hard. "Ruth and Josh… they turned…"
In my rush to save Bella, I'd almost completely forgotten about the horror that I'd witnessed.
Carlisle's head shot up and he started looking around frantically.
"Are there others?" he gasped. "Where? Where are they?"
"Quil shot Ruth, but I'm not sure who killed Josh. Their bodies are on the other side of the infirmary," I said, sadly.
"But you don't know if there are more?" he asked, sharply.
I shook my head.
Carlisle jumped to his feet and shouted to Ben who had just come running from the direction of their house.
Ben rushed to Carlisle's side, his feet almost slipping out from under him in the wet grass from the water used to put out the fire.
"Two of our people turned into zombies. I don't know if there are any more. We need to quarantine everyone in their homes. Once everyone's secure, we'll have to go house to house checking for the infected," Carlisle said, avoiding mentioning who had turned.
"Oh fuck," Ben gasped, searching the crowd. "Arnold! Mike! Seth! Come here."
The three guys along with a few others rushed to Ben's side and were quickly given orders to get people back to their homes. Each was assigned a different house to make sure that all the people were accounted for.
It was only after that that Carlisle took a hold of Ben's shoulder and said, "Ben. It was Ruth and Josh Weber who turned. I'm so sorry, son."
Bella let out a sob as Ben's eyes went wide with horror and then filled with pain as what Carlisle said sank in.
For a moment, he seemed frozen unable to react or think.
Carlisle gripped his shoulder firmly.
"Ben. You need to keep it together. We need to get this place locked down," he said, quietly to him.
"But Angela…" he said, and I could see in that moment that his eyes had filled with tears.
"I know…" Carlisle murmured. "Let's get this done and then you need to go to her."
"Where's Isaac?" Bella suddenly asked. He was Josh's twin brother and Angela's little brother.
"Oh my god. He's with Chris. They were playing together this afternoon," Carlisle gasped.
"ESME!" Carlisle shouted, running to her side and gesturing frantically towards their home.
After Carlisle pressed a gun into her hand, Esme rushed towards their home, not looking back.
Emmett and Eleazar were suddenly at our side.
"What can we do?" Emmett asked.
"I need you to go to Tanya Denali's house and check to make sure that Victoria and she are inside. Eleazar, go check on Mrs. Cope and her grandson Mike. The Young's live next door. Make sure that there are four of them in the house because Quil lives there too," Ben said, giving out orders in an emotionless voice.
Quickly, people were told to go home and in some cases had to be escorted there.
It wasn't long before Esme came back and told us that Isaac was fine and that he was asleep in Chris' room. However, then Emmett returned and to our shock he had two squirming bundles in his arms.
"What's happened?" Ben and I asked at the same time.
"Victoria and Tanya are gone and they've left their babies behind," he said, a look of shocked horror on his face.
I growled, climbing to my feet.
"It's not like that, Edward. There's blood. A lot of it," Emmett said.
I didn't know what to think. If one or both of them had been killed, where were the bodies? Zombies wouldn't have been able to get out of the house on their own.
While Carlisle and Arnold went house to house checking to make sure no one was infected, Liam, Embry, Peter, and Eleazar searched the empty houses for any sign of the two missing women or zombies that might have found a way into the community.
I'd been ordered to go with Bella and Esme to Carlisle's house where Esme would be able to rinse my eyes with saline.
I didn't like not being a part of the search team, but my eyes were only getting more and more painful and I didn't like how they sometimes blurred making it hard to see.
So, it wasn't until later that afternoon when the community had been checked and rechecked that we were all told to gather at the community house.
As people wandered inside, I saw how the day had taken its toll on people. Most of them were covered in soot and had red rimmed eyes. But it was the identical haunted look in their eyes that really told the story of what had happened to all of us.
I wasn't surprised when Ben arrived without Angela. He looked even more haggard than the rest and I could tell that it had taken everything in him to come to the meeting and leave her behind.
"Is everyone here?" Ben asked.
"Almost," Carlisle said. "Tyler and Aro are not here yet."
"We can't wait for them. I need to get back to Angela," he said, gruffly.
"As you all know, last night we lost the infirmary and the barn. We weren't able to salvage any of the medicines, but thanks to Bella and Edward we were able to rescue four of the goats-"
"What happened to Victoria and Tanya?" Mike asked, interrupting Ben.
"I'm getting to-" Ben tried to continue.
"Someone in here is a traitor!" Quil practically shouted. "It had to be someone who set the two buildings on fire and Ruth and Josh didn't get infected on their own."
I could practically see the anger pouring off of him. I knew a lot of his anger was the result of what he'd had to do the night before. I never had to give anyone mercy that I cared about. I could only imagine how it would tear someone apart. I'd killed Bella's dad, but I hadn't known him. I'd barely known Bella at the time.
His words seemed to ignite a panic amongst the others who clutched their children close and stared suspiciously at each other.
"We need to-" Ben began again, but was interrupted.
"It's not a difficult deduction. We all know who the traitor is," a voice spoke from behind us.
Everyone's heads turned towards the door to see Aro stride into the room with Tyler who was dragging a person with him that had a bag over their head.
Roughly, Tyler threw his captive to the ground in the center of the room and yanked the bag off their head.
I jumped angrily to my feet when I saw that it was Jasper.