When Jackie got out of the bathroom, she was surprised to see that Catherine was not in her bed. Worried, Jackie went looking for Catherine. She wasn't in the kitchen or anywhere downstairs. So, Jackie decided to go upstairs to Catherine's bedroom, Jackie hadn't been upstairs since the night Catherine told her she wasn't worth it. As Jackie got close to Catherine's bedroom she stopped as her stomach turned upside down. Catherine's door was wide open instead of going in she called out her name. Jackie said, " Catherine." As Catherine heard Jackie call out her name she said, "Come in." But, there was silence. "Jackie, come in." Jackie wouldn't go into her bedroom. She walked back downstairs. Catherine was confused on what was going on with Jackie. As she got up from bed, she went downstairs to look for her. Entering Jackie's bedroom, she saw Jackie sitting on the edge of her bed with her head looking down into her lap. "Jackie, what's wrong?" No response. Catherine sat beside her and softly said "what hurts." Jackie responded by saying her chest. Jackie meant to say her heart. "Why didn't you come into my bedroom?" When Catherine asked that Jackie began to cry. Catherine was confused. "Talk to me, Jackie. Please tell me what is going on."
As Jackie got up off the bed in an attempt to get away from this conversation with Catherine. Catherine grabbed her by the arm. "Let me go, Catherine! I don't want to talk about this!" But, Catherine wouldn't allow Jackie to run away from their issues any longer. She had had enough. Months of Jackie avoiding their issues. Catherine thought it was now or never, the stress of this was to much to continue on with this situation between them. Catherine yelled at her, "Either you talk to me now or you need to leave my home. I am not going to let this go on between us any longer, whatever this is, it is to much stress on me and the baby. I love you, but I can't do this anymore." Crying, Jackie stopped trying to get away, "I can't go into your bedroom because you cheated on me with him in that room. I play that night over and over in my head and my entire chest hurts. I can't breathe. I want to forget, but I can't. I want to die. Are those the kind of things you want to hear me say, Catherine ? I don't understand why I keep coming back to you."
Catherine was shocked by Jackie's words. Catherine didn't know what to say. All that came out was "I'm sorry, I hurt you. But, I can't change the past. I made a mistake." Catherine sat down on Jackie's bed. As she did so, Jackie sat backdown and held her hand as she continued to cry. Catherine leaned into kiss Jackie, but she pulled away. "I can't. Can we just be friends?" Catherine knew she could never be just friends with Jackie. Catherine softly shook her head up and down in agreement. As Catherine got up she told Jackie she needed to get ready. As she retreated back upstairs to get in her shower, she sobbed loudly in the shower. She knew Jackie couldn't hear her as she would probably never come up to her bedroom again. Catherine loved Jackie and could not live life without her. She needed Jackie with her. Life was to hard when Jackie was not home where she belonged with her.
The next few weeks of Catherine's pregnancy, Jackie's headaches decreased. Jackie and Catherine were living as friends. Jackie decided on taking only two classes instead of a full course load as Catherine had insisted she not do. As Catherine stayed home, Jackie went to school. Jackie started hanging out at the library with Rachel and Zach. Both got tired of Sandy and formed their own study group with Jackie. She sometimes would come home at midnight, Catherine would stay up waiting for her. Catherine had had enough one evening of this friend thing when she saw a young man drive and drop off Jackie. Catherine watched them as they talked and laughed in her driveway. Overcome with jealousy, Catherine waited by the door. Angry, Catherine reproached Jackie and grabbed her as she came through the front door. Shocked, Jackie asked. "Catherine, are you okay." With a look of concern, Jackie watched as Catherine face turned to one of pain. At that moment, Catherine's water broke. Jackie looked down to the carpet underneath them as a gush of water came out from under Catherine's house dress.
Jackie began to panic as Catherine grabbed on to her hard. "Jackie, my water broke. We need to get to the hospital". As Jackie realized what was going on, she began to freakout. Jackie said, "I'm going to get the car." As she searched for the keys, Catherine began breathing frantically as the pain increased. "Get my bag in my bedroom, Jackie." Jackie ran upstairs and retrieved her bag and got the car out of the garage. As she drove to the hospital, Jackie watched as Catherine's pain intensified. "Breathe, Catherine," Catherine was scared, she never imagined herself having a baby. The pain was intense. As Jackie pulled the SUV to the emergency doors, as Jackie ran in. A nurse came out with a wheelchair followed by Jackie. Jackie parked the car and put her head on the steering wheel. She took her time in getting out of the car. As she entered the hospital with Catherine's bag, the nurse led her to Catherine. As she walked in behind a curtain, a male doctor had his hand up Catherine's vagina. Jackie got a glimpse of Catherine's vagina, and turned her head away as she made her way up to Catherine's head. Catherine winced in pain as she grabbed for Jackie. As the doctor walked out, Catherine told Jackie she was scared. Jackie was in complete shock.
He told them that the baby was coming quickily, as they got Catherine ready and moved to delivery. Jackie couldn't take seeing Catherine in so much pain. The nurses came in and monitored Catherine. Jackie continued to hold Catherine's hand and feed her ice chips. The contractions were getting closer together. The doctor came in and excitedly said, "Ladies, are we ready to have a baby!" As he checked Catherine and began drugging her up, the nurse came into get Jackie. The nurse gave Jackie some scrubs and explained what would be happening. As Jackie returned, Catherine was ready to go. Her legs were fully spread apart as the doctor was seated and looking up into her vagina. Jackie thought she was going to pass out. As the doctor and nurses began to ask Catherine to push. Catherine began to scream, Jackie never heard Catherine scream. Catherine was in agony, she told Jackie she felt like she was being ripped apart. Jackie continued to hold her hand, Jackie's complete arm was red and had nail prints all the way up to her shoulder. As Catherine pushed and pushed, Jackie finally heard a baby cry. The doctor said, it's a girl as he laid her on Catherine's chest. Catherine was crying with the baby on her chest. As the doctor worked to clean Catherine up. Jackie stared at the baby. As the nurses took the baby, Catherine told Jackie to go with the baby. A doctor came and looked the baby over and wheeled her in a little glass case to another room down the hall. Jackie watched the baby get checked, washed, and weighed. The baby was crying the entire time. As Jackie watched from behind the glass, the nurse brought the baby back out and returned her to Catherine's room. Once in the room with Catherine, the nurse asked Jackie to sit down and take off her shirt. In only a bra, the nurse put the baby on Jackie's chest . Jackie was in complete shock. The baby immediately stopped crying. As Jackie watched Catherine from her chair, she saw Catherine close her eyes and drift off to sleep.
Alone for an half hour with the baby in this position, who was sleeping on her chest, the nurse came into ask her what they were going to name the baby. Jackie said she didn't know. The nurse took the baby, changed her, and gave her a bottle. The baby was placed in a glass case and wheeled over next to Catherine. Jackie laid on the couch next to the window and fell asleep. Around, 3am the baby began to cry and woke up both Catherine and Jackie. Jackie went over to soothe the baby. She picked her up softly and held her to her chest as she got close to Catherine. Jackie asked Catherine if she wanted to hold her but she didn't .
Just then the nurse came in. She gave Jackie a lesson on feeding her, burping her and changing her diaper. Jackie held the baby for about an hour until the baby fell asleep. As she placed her down, she looked closely at her facial features and her tiny little hands and feet. She had blonde hair like her mama. Jackie noticed Catherine staring at her, Jackie walked over to sit next to her. "Are you okay, Catherine? Do you need me to do anything for you?" Catherine put out her hand for Jackie to hold as she drifted back to sleep. In the morning, doctors came in to examine both Catherine and the baby. Catherine was told to take a shower, in which Jackie helped her. Jackie was scared the entire time, Catherine was sore and could barely move. Catherine looked somber. She was not smiling, just doing what the nurses instructed her to do. She hardly had held her little girl. The baby mostly was taken care of and held by Jackie.
When the nurse asked Catherine for the baby's name. She said Madeline. Jackie looked at the baby and started calling her Mattie. She asked where she got the name from, but Catherine didn't answer. As they got ready to leave the hospital next day, the nurses helped Jackie with everything. The car seat and the placing of the baby and Catherine in the car. Jackie listen intently to all the instructions of feedings, on burping, on bathing. She took lots of notes.
Catherine didn't speak much on their drive home. Jackie drove slower than she had ever in her life. Her driver's mirror was on the baby the entire time. As she pulled into the driveway, Jackie went around to help Catherine out and get the baby out with her car seat . Jackie helped Catherine to the bedroom downstairs next to hers. Catherine couldn't do stairs in her delicate situation. Jackie ran up stairs to the baby's room and brought down the bassinet. She also brought down other stuff she thought Catherine and the baby might need. Baby and mama took a nap as Jackie worked on getting Catherine's prescriptions. She called her own mother to tell her about the baby girl. Mrs. Kirk was going to be flying in next day, she knew Catherine and Jackie would need her help. Plus she saw Catherine as a daughter now. Jackie also told her mother that something was wrong with Catherine, she did not want to hold the baby.
As Jackie continued to care for Mattie, she found herself falling in love with this little baby more everyday. Between feedings and diaper changes, Jackie gave more attention to the baby than to Catherine or Ethan. Jackie rocked her and talked to her. She held her little hands, studied her tiny feet and facial features. Mrs. Kirk arrived next day, Jackie was grateful for some help because she could finally get a few hours of sleep. As soon as Mrs. Kirk saw Madeline she fell in love. Both Jackie and Mrs. Kirk took care of everything for the next two weeks. Catherine was finally moving around more easily and eating some, but still not to interested in holding Madeline. Both Jackie and Mrs. Kirk were worried about Catherine. Mrs. Kirk told Jackie she was probably suffering from postpartum depression and she would need to see a doctor.