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Chapter 21: So This Is Christmas

December 14th

When Orihime came to, she was alone in a small empty tatami room. She assumed she was still at Urahara's place; it looked like a room that would belong to him. She decided to wait for someone to come get her, thinking she had been put there for a reason. Also, the solitude allowed her some privacy to collect her thoughts about the events of the day.

At first she took a moment to get her bearings. She looked out the window, and saw the dark street below, confirming her suspicion that she was still at Urahara's house. Everything was quiet, and she couldn't feel anyone's specific spiritual pressure. Next she thought to take out her phone to check the time: 5:14 p.m. She had only been unconscious for about twenty minutes. She paced the small room and wondered what was going on elsewhere. She also wondered what was stopping her from going to get her answers herself.

Then she remembered the green eyes that had shocked her to the point of passing out. She backed up to the nearest wall and allowed her back to slide down it until she sat with her knees next to her chin, hands slack at her sides, as her mind finally allowed what she had seen to sink in. For a long moment, all her mind's eye saw were his eyes. She didn't have the capacity to have any feelings about it. It took all her mental strength just to attempt to reconcile what her eyes had shown her with what her heart had known with great certainty: Ulquiorra was dead. Dead as a doornail. And yet, those were his eyes she had seen.

After that long moment had passed, and her mind's eye had temporarily agreed to disagree with her heart, she set aside her disbelief and examined the memory in a bit more detail. Her mind's eye zoomed out from those haunting eyes and focused on the entire person. There in her memory were things that her heart demanded be used as proof that this was not Ulquiorra. The man was not a hollow, first and foremost. His neck and part of his chest had been exposed - he had been wearing Urahara's clothes, after all – and there was no evidence of a hollow hole. The man with Ulquiorra's eyes was also a bit taller than Ulquiorra had been. Not much, but noticeable when he had approached her. His skin was fair, but not bone-white. He showed emotion much more easily that she had ever seen Ulquiorra do. Come to think of it, his pupils were not cat-like, but regular human circle pupils. Were there the tear-like markings on his face? She couldn't recall, and if that was the case then probably not, she reasoned.

For a brief moment, relief washed over her as her heart was satisfied in its conclusion that the man with the enormous reiatsu could not have been Ulquiorra, but only bore a strong resemblance to her former guard. But after that moment had passed, her heart began change, as hearts do; its relieved feeling turning into grief. She had lost him before. She did not want to revisit those memories. Then, she remembered what he had said to her.

'Are you afraid, woman?'

Ah yes. That was indeed his voice. Those were indeed his words. And that was indeed his heart, which she knew he had possessed back in Hueco Mundo, which reached out to hers.

It had all been too much. Even if it had happened separate from Ichigo's intervention, it would have been disturbing and difficult to accept. But as it was, after feeling so abused by Ichigo, the one she had once trusted with her heart and soul, and having her Shun Shun Rikka abandon her, having to subsequently deal with such a dissonant image as Ulquiorra's return at that time was just too much for her to take.

Her Shun Shun Rikka! How could she have forgotten? Her hands flew to her temples and she called for her fairies. They did not appear to her, but she heard Shun-O's voice.

"We are very sorry, Orihime. We must have worried you. But I'm sure if you look inside yourself, you'll understand that we actually were doing your bidding."

Orihime's eyes darted from side to side, looking for the source of the voice.

"Don't worry, Orihime. We are here. We have not left you. You just lack the will to summon us now."

"But why, Shun-O? I called to you so desperately!" she whispered.

Tsubaki answered, "Listen, woman, it's not our fault your boyfriend went berserker. You may have said you wanted to restore him, but we listen to your soul, and it was saying loud and clear not to do it."

Ayame's voice cut him off, "You were afraid, Orihime. You didn't want to provoke him, and believe me, we wanted to protect you, but your soul stood its ground."

Orihime thought about what they said as their voices again faded to the background. She knew she wanted Ichigo to get better. She knew that her restoration wasn't helping him. But was that reason enough for her soul to contradict her consciousness?

"Hmm, if I was my soul, what would I want most?" she asked herself out loud, oblivious to how absurd and contradictory the question was, because as odd as it was, it was the right question to ask. She knew what she wanted deep down. She wanted to be loved by Ichigo. She wanted to be respected by him and accepted into his heart. She knew that when she first started dating him and restoring him, it was done in a loving way, and he was letting her into his heart little by little. But at some point, things changed, and every time she restored him, she was left feeling more used and empty. She had been incrementally walling off her heart from him to protect herself. She also knew, deep down, that every time he took her restoration from her, she fell more and more out of love with him. The Ichigo she originally fell in love with would never do that to her. He would protect her with everything he had. The Ichigo she saw in Urahara's basement was not the boy she loved. She didn't know if he still existed.

She wiped the tears that were silently trailing off her cheeks as she finally articulated to herself that while she hoped that her Ichigo, the one she had gone to Hueco Mundo to protect, was still there, the Ichigo that presented to her recently, the one being manipulated by his hollow and manipulating her in turn, was only going to tear them apart if Ichigo didn't find a way stop it on his own. And she knew there was nothing she could do except to hold her ground and demand that he came to her as her Ichigo, not the imposter she saw in Urahara's training ground earlier. That is why her Shun Shun Rikka wouldn't manifest when called to restore him. They knew what she needed and wanted before she was able to recognize it herself.

Orihime took a deep, shaky breath, and decided she had spent enough time thinking. Just as she was about to open the door, someone knocked on the other side.

"Inoue-san, I'm coming in," the voice of her dear friend Uryuu reached her through the sliding door.

Orihime opened the door for him and offered him a small smile. He looked worried. "How are you feeling? Have you just woken up?"

"I'm alright," she answered, aware that her eyes must be red from crying. "I've been up for the better part of an hour, just thinking about everything."

"I'm so sorry, Inoue-san. I really didn't think it would be that bad." It wasn't just concern for Orihime that rattled his voice, Uryuu himself was clearly troubled by what he had seen and heard.

"How is he?"

"Kurosaki?"

She nodded.

"Still unconscious. At least he was when they left with him."

"Left?" she asked with a slight edge of panic in her voice.

"Yes. Kurosaki-san, Ryuuken, and Urahara decided that he needs to be trained to control his hollow. I am not allowed to tell you where they are taking him; they haven't even told me yet. Once they have him stabilized, I will be brought in to help, so I'll be able to let you know how he's doing. But for now we'll just have to wait. Oh, I'm so sorry, Inoue-san," his own eyes became misty as Orihime started to break down in sobs in front of him. He pulled her to his chest and they both held each other and waited for the pain to subside.

After what felt like a long time, Orihime stepped back and wiped her face with the back of her hand. "So, did they all go?"

"No, Kuchiki-san, Abarai-san, Yoruichi-san, Tessai-san, and our fathers left. Urahara is here. He wants to speak with you. I'm supposed to take you to him when you are ready."

Orihime stood up straight and turned to the door. "I'm ready"

"Ok, here we go," Uryuu said without a lot of confidence, leading the way.

When they arrived in Urahara's office, the shopkeeper stood and bowed to Orihime. "I'm very sorry to have caused you distress, Inoue-san. Please forgive me. I'll explain all that I can." With that he stood and gestured for her to take a seat. She took it, and Uryuu sat next to her.

"Urahara-san, I have many questions, but why don't you start," Orihime offered.

Urahara nodded and crossed his legs. "As we suspected, Kurosaki-san's hollow was manipulating his mind. We were able to witness the extent to which its ability to influence Kurosaki-san reached today, before he was neutralized."

"Yes, I have questions about that, of course. But first, please tell me: what's going to happen to Ichigo? When can I see him again?"

"Right – well, to answer your last question first, I don't know. It is dependent on when Kurosaki-san is able to control his hollow and his urges for your restoration. As for your first question, what I can tell you is that Isshin Kurosaki, Ryuuken Ishida, and Yoruichi-san will be working together with my indirect supervision to help him gain control of his hollow. We have several methods we'd like to try, and hopefully we'll be successful sooner than later. We are going to focus on him being able to resist his hollow's influence and increasing his physical body's ability to contain his hollow simultaneously. Hopefully we will be able to draw on his innate reiatsu to create a way to fortify his physical body. We hope that we will be able to take him to Soul Society sooner than later. We will have more resources at our disposal and it is anticipated that he will finish his training on a shorter timeframe there. In the meantime the cover story is that he is studying abroad for a while."

Orihime nodded, allowing herself to process everything intellectually and putting aside her emotions about the ordeal at present. "And why is your role in Ichigo's training going to be indirect?"

"Well, Inoue-san, I have orders from Soul Society to focus on another matter. And although I am not officially affiliated with Soul Society, the object of my responsibility is under its jurisdiction."

Orihime's eyebrows knit together as she tried to remain patient with Urahara's indirectness. She decided she didn't want to find out how long he could dance around the topic before he became informative, and asked, "So, is that why Ulquiorra is here?"

Urahara laughed nervously, "More or less, yes. I don't know how much you want to know today, but he is the reason I've been so busy. He's also the reason for your jewelry. As you experienced, his reiatsu is immeasurable. The necklaces redirected his reiatsu away from those who wore them and back to him. However, what you experienced was only a fraction of what he is capable of. If he wished, he could have easily destroyed all of Karakura, including those of you wearing these necklaces. Innately, he has the potential to be very dangerous. However, he has no ill intentions and does well suppressing his reiatsu on his own these days. He wears an identical necklace at all times that kind of acts as a suppression device, constantly capturing and redirecting back toward him any unintentional reiatsu flares. However, traces are able to pass through. You were able to detect some about a week ago and paid me a visit, if you'll recall."

Orihime nodded and Urahara continued. "You may also recall the experiment I requested your assistance for in Soul Society. You recognized his reiatsu then, as well, although you told Rukia-san and Matsumoto-san that you were surely mistaken at that time."

Orihime's eyes went wide in shock. "They told you about that?"

"Yes, of course. They had also experienced 'the incident' in Soul Society. They were rightfully concerned that you were on to something."

Orihime was starting to get stressed. "So you are saying that you knew he was alive all that time ago? It has been months! Has he been living here all this time?"

"Please, Inoue-san, understand that I did not know it was him until well after our experiment. There were other factors at play that warranted your participation in the experiment. Now is not the time to divulge that specific information. Regardless, shortly after the experiment I learned that Cifer-san was part of 'the incident'. If you'll recall, I spent months in Soul Society afterward, only permanently returning to Karakura at the beginning of this month. Cifer-san has only been here since then."

Orihime sat back, and looked at Uryuu with an expression that read, 'can you believe this?'. Uryuu shook his head and spoke up. "How is it safe to have a hollow – no - an arrancar with a second release, living here in Karakura?"

"He's not a hollow," Orihime said in a detached voice.

"Inoue-san is right, Ishida-san. He is not a hollow. Nor is he human or shinigami. He is a type of previously unclassified plus. He has no known offensive capabilities apart from the sheer force of his reiatsu. He can do flash step. When he was first reincarnated as a plus in Soul Society, he was in what he informed me was his 'segunda etapa' release, but only insofar as appearances go. He had no zanpakuto and was physically weak. Generally when a soul is reborn in Soul Society, he looks the same as when he died in the living world. In Cifer-san's case, it was as he died in Hueco Mundo. As his soul became acclimatized, his physical form was able to match the humanoid appearance of the population of Soul Society. I don't know he is able to change his appearance anymore. As far as I know he hasn't tried." Urahara was starting to ramble, thinking more about his work than his conversation with Orihime and Uryuu, until Uryuu cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, I'm allowing myself to get sidetracked. Suffice it to say there is a lot more unknown than there is known. However, I have spent the last few months spending most of my time with Cifer-san and can confidently say that he is not a threat as long as his reiatsu is suppressed. I am working on making a gigai for him that will be more reliable and permanent than the necklaces, but until then he will be confined to my training grounds and office. The poor thing is getting quite bored and lonely."

"Lonely?" Orihime asked, surprised at herself for saying it out loud.

"Yes. I'm sorry to spring this on you now, Inoue-san, but I feel compelled to tell you that Cifer-san is quite anxious to speak with you, and although his existence is news to you, he has been waiting since the experiment. Don't misunderstand, he will certainly continue to wait if you are not ready to meet him, but if you have no objections, he would welcome your presence immediately."

"Does he allow you to call him that?"

"What?" Urahara was thrown off by Orihime dodging his question.

"Does he allow you to call him Cifer-san, or do you do it despite his objections?" she repeated calmly.

"Actually, Cifer-san has never brought it up. Why would he dislike it?" Urahara asked, still feeling like he lost control of the conversation.

"He once told me not to call him as I would a human - with honorifics - and if I was to call him, I should call him 'Ulquiorra'."

"Well, perhaps he is feeling more 'human' these days," Urahara supplied with an uncomfortable laugh. "Anyway, about you speaking with him-"

"I'm sorry, Urahara-san. This is still too much for me to deal with. I can't do it right now. I'll think about it," she stood as if she was ending the conversation. Uryuu picked up on it and stood with her.

"I'll walk you home, Inoue-san," he offered.

"Thank you. I'm sorry for my rudeness, Urahara-san. And thank you for helping Ichigo."

"Of course, Inoue-san. Please stop by anytime, whether to get whatever information I can share about Kurosaki-san's progress or to speak with Cifer-san."

Orihime nodded and left with Uryuu without another word, too mentally exhausted to talk anymore.

"I'm sorry, Cifer-san, she just isn't ready to speak to you. She was very distraught by Kurosaki-san's behavior and she had believed you were dead. She needs some time to process her emotions."

"I understand, Kisuke Urahara."

"Are you going to be alright, Cifer-san?"

"I've waited this long. I can continue to wait."

December 21st

"Kisuke Urahara. Why would the woman persist in avoiding me?"

Urahara rolled his eyes. Ulquiorra had kept it together for a few days, but over the past three or four days his impatience at the situation was beginning to seep through his unemotional façade.

"Be patient, Cifer-san. Would you like some good news?"

"Yes."

"I have a new gigai for you to try."

December 24th

"I believe that does it then. It looks like the 78th's time's the charm!" Urahara exclaimed as he set down his reiatsu wand, satisfied with the final adjustments.

Ulquiorra looked at himself in his new gigai in the mirror and flexed his fists, rolled his shoulders, and tapped his toes to the ground, testing it out.

"This one is more responsive than and not as heavy as the previous attempts."

"Oh, how very generous of you, Cifer-san. Well, let's not waste any more time. Let's get you outside!" Urahara could not contain himself; he was happy for his stoic houseguest, and no lack of gratitude from the former Espada was going to ruin his mood.

The pair ascended the ladder from the training grounds and were making their way out of Urahara's office when they heard a voice from the shop entrance. Her voice.

"Urahara-san? Are you home?"

Both men froze, wide-eyed in disbelief.

Urahara recovered first. "You stay here, Cifer-san," he whispered before calling out, "I'm coming, Inoue-san!"

Ulquiorra could not have moved if he had wanted to. He heard Urahara's muffled voice from the next room as he spoke to the woman. He heard her voice reply. He couldn't make out what they were saying.

Before he knew it, Urahara peeked back into the room that Ulquiorra was waiting in, face stretched into a wide grin. "She wants to see you!" he squealed and gave him a thumbs up before disappearing again.

Ulquiorra took a step forward and then hesitated, nervous. The last thing he wanted was a repeat of their last exchange. Before he could mentally prepare himself, Urahara returned to the room with Orihime in tow.

"Please, you two, make yourselves comfortable. I'll be in my office if you need me," Urahara gestured to the low tables and cushions on the floor. They were in the same room that Ichigo's birthday party had been held in. Urahara left the room still smiling, despite the awkward feelings of the rooms other two occupants.

Orihime sat first, keeping her eyes focused on her hands. Ulquiorra stood, seemingly trapped in a state of suspended animation, until Orihime cleared her throat and quietly spoke. "I'm sorry, Ulquiorra."

His name on her lips; had it always sounded so gentle? He pondered this as his feet moved him closer to her unbidden. Before he knew what he was doing, he was sitting seiza before her, palms flat on the tatami, and bringing his forehead down to the floor as well. "I am the one who should apologize, woman. You have done nothing wrong."

Orihime was at a loss for words, watching him nearly prostrate himself before her. Finally she stammered, "Please, Ul, Ulquiorra, please stop."

Slowly, Ulquiorra raised his head and met her gaze. They sat there, the two of them staring at each other, transfixed. Neither could seem to truly believe what he/she saw across the table. Orihime subconsciously shook her head in disbelief, breaking Ulquiorra's spell. He was again hit with a wave of shame and looked down.

"Ulquiorra, if you don't mind, please let me see your face. I never thought I'd see it again, and I'm having a hard time believing my own eyes. I feel like the little blue men are playing with my mind," she said somewhat dreamily.

"Little blue men?" Ulquiorra asked, quirking an eyebrow.

Orihime gasped at the expression. She had seen him irritated, disinterested, and enraged. A week ago she thought she had seen concern on his face. Before he died she was sure she saw regret. All of those previous variations in expression were rather miniscule in their degrees of differentiation. This one, however, this confused quirk of the brow, was so animated and out of character for him that after a long moment of widening eyes, she couldn't help but snort out a laugh, followed by an blush of embarrassment. She covered her face, apologized for laughing, and after she caught her breath, she peeked back up at him. He was back to his usual blank expression.

She looked at the details of him. He was Ulquiorra, all right. If she wasn't paying attention, she saw him how he used to be, bone pale, tear-tracked, and untouchable. But little by little, it was sinking in how much his appearance, and now flashes of his demeanor, had changed.

"It's really you, isn't it?" she asked quietly.

"Yes," he answered softly.

"I never thought I'd see you again."

"I'm sorry if my presence disturbs you."

"No!" she denied sharply. "I'm not… I mean… I'm glad you are…" She shook her head, trying to get her thoughts in order, and then looked at her lap again. "I felt like we left things unfinished when you died. I am grateful that you are alive, in whatever way this is."

She looked into his eyes after she spoke, and saw him staring back at her intensely. His nostrils flared as he inhaled an uneven breath.

Ulquiorra's chest tightened and filled at the same time. He was unable to identify what was happening to him. His heartrate began to increase, and his mind was flooded with questions for her, but he felt unable to articulate them.

"Are you alright, Ulquiorra?" she asked in a concerned voice. His inner turmoil was evident.

"Er, yes. Thank you for your kindness, woman," he spoke in that familiar, velvety timbre, causing her to relax as a small, lazy smile took over her expression.

"Ah, how nostalgic. You look different, Ulquiorra, but your voice is the same," she smiled.

"And this pleases you?"

"Yes."

"I am surprised."

"Why?"

"I would have thought you would want to erase me from your memory."

"I would never do that, Ulquiorra," she countered gently.

"But why, woman? Why would you want to recall such a dark time in your life, and the person who was responsible for it?"

"If you'll recall, Ulquiorra, I chose to go with you. And you were merely following orders."

"Not at the end, I wasn't."

"…I know."

"Then why?"

Orihime hesitated again. "Promise you won't be mad?"

"No, but I suspect I won't be."

"Because of the heart."

He sunk deeper onto his haunches, confused.

"Don't look at me like that, Ulquiorra. You know it's true. Before you died, you felt it, didn't you?"

"I do not know."

It was Orihime's turn to look defeated.

"I'm not denying it, woman. Although I have many memories of my previous incarnation, I do not have access to all of them. I had hoped that by speaking with you, I would be provided with clarification."

"Oh. Is this helping? Do you feel like things are getting clearer?"

"To the contrary. I feel more confused." Ulquiorra appeared despondent.

"I'm sorry. I'll go." Orihime got up and began to leave before Ulquiorra knew what was going on. She was embarrassed. She had said too much, and he didn't even know what she was talking about. She felt ashamed of herself.

She was several paces outside when he caught up with her. "Woman!" he shouted as he scrambled to catch up to her on the icy pavement. He had not had enough practice in his new gigai to maneuver over the slick surface. As he reached her he attempted to stop but continued his forward motion, his feet sliding in opposite directions as he tried unsuccessfully to find traction. His upper body lurched forward to compensate, and he began what was sure to be a very hard fall onto his backside, before he heard Orihime's voice call out, "I reject!"

His fall was broken by her shield, and she approached him. She grabbed him by the elbows and helped him to steady on his feet. He latched his hands onto her upper arms, still unsteady. When he stopped wobbling, she looked up into his face, waiting to find the reason he had come after her with no coat and wearing his indoor slippers.

He didn't let go of her, but stared into her eyes with burning curiosity. "I am sorry I upset you, woman, and I don't know why, but I know that thoughts of you are by far the most compelling ones I have had during this, albeit short, lifetime. I have a great desire to learn what it is about you that draws me to you. I feel that you have much to teach me, woman. It is selfish to ask, but would you allow me to meet you again?"

The look on his face was so sincere. Orihime didn't have much of an icy exterior in the first place, but despite that she melted into a puddle of what, affection? Could it be called that? She wasn't sure, but she did know she could not refuse him, not when she also wanted a chance to rectify the past.

She smiled up to him and nodded with a cheerful, "Mmhmm!"

Ulquiorra released her and looked at her, mystified by the abrupt change in her demeanor.

"Oh, before I go, I have something for you, Ulquiorra." She passed him a smallish box.

He took it and examined it. It was covered in red patterned paper. "Open it when you get inside. Urahara-san will know what it is. Ask him to contact me to arrange another meeting. Good night, Ulquiorra. Merry Christmas!" She smiled again, turned, and started walking home.

When Ulquiorra finished his very careful journey back to the Shoten (which consisted of only several steps), he went back to the tatami room and placed the box on one of the tables. The woman had told him to open it, but not how to accomplish the task.. He examined the box and found a seam in the paper. Pulling on it, the red paper ripped, revealing a white box underneath. Carefully, he pulled open what he had correctly guessed was a tab opening and saw a white wedge with a strawberry on top. He called Urahara in to explain the mystery object to him.

"Well well, what do we have here, Cifer-san?"

"That is why I have asked you for clarification, Kisuke Urahara. The woman informed me you would know."

"Of course I do, Cifer-san, it was just an expression. This is a slice of Christmas cake." Urahara removed the protective plastic sides from the slice, revealing a layer of sliced strawberries and whipped cream.

"Oh. What does it do?" Ulquiorra asked.

"Nothing. You eat it, Cifer-san. I'll get you a fork."

Urahara returned with the fork and gave it to Ulquiorra, trying in vain to suppress his amusement. Ulquiorra ignored him and took a bite.

It was mind-blowing.

"What kind of cake did you say this is, Kisuke Urahara?"

"Christmas cake."

The woman had said 'merry Christmas' to him before she left.

"So this is Christmas. I enjoy Christmas," Ulquiorra said flatly.

Urahara covered his mouth and began to leave the room, although he was able to say before he burst into laughter, "Glad to hear it Cifer-san."

Thank you for reading, one and all. How did you like Ulquiorra and Orihime's reunion? Please review or drop me a PM to let me know. Happy New Year!