Heartbreak Warfare :: Chapter Fifteen

Bo slowly opened his eyes. The room was dark. The consistent beep of his heart monitor drew him further out of his sleepy slumber and into reality. He stretched, suddenly aware of Hope's petite body crammed into the bed with him. She jolted awake, startled by his sudden movement.

"Brady," Hope whispered as she rubbed her eyes, "You're awake."

"What happened?" Bo questioned, sleep coating his voice.

"You're in the hospital." Hope caressed his cheek with the back of her fingers, "You scared me. How do you feel?"

Bo shrugged, "I feel…. okay."

"That's a start." Hope smiled and leaned in to kiss his cheek.

He tried to remember what had happened to him last, but the harder he tried the more distant it became. He stared at Hope. He searched her face for anger, hurt, or disappointment, but he didn't find any.

"Hope, I'm sorry." Bo croaked out. Emotion was suddenly overwhelming him, strangling his throat.

"Bo, stop." Hope shook her head. She sat up and grabbed his hand, "I love you. This was an accident."

Bo shook his head in disagreement. He didn't think he could hate himself more. He felt weak physically and mentally.

"Brady. You're everything to me." Hope whispered, "I'm just so happy you're alive."

"I don't remember…" Bo confessed, "I don't remember anything."

"You and Steve were grilling and you guys had a couple of beers." Hope replied gently. She stroked the back of his hand that she held with her thumb, "Steve said you found some of your dad's Irish Whiskey in the basement and got carried away. You tore up the house…. He called me to tell me you were upset and he needed help, but when I got there you were unconscious. We called 911. Kayla said you had alcohol poisoning."

Bo absorbed her words like a sponge. He couldn't believe he let this happen. He couldn't believe he was putting her through this. He exhaled slowly, composing himself. A part of him was glad he couldn't remember. He almost felt embarrassed, but mostly he felt the familiar anger beginning to bubble deep inside.

"Bo…" Hope placed her hand on his cheek, "I know that you wanted to keep this between us, but Steve and Kayla know now. Marlena will know soon too."

"And Jennifer." Bo mumbled, pulling away from her. Shame seeped into his bones.

Hope didn't try to deny that Jennifer already knew. He knew her too well.

"I'm sorry…" Hope whispered, "But they all love you. They're here to help. We need help."

"You don't." Bo snapped, "You don't need me. You could walk out that door and move on with your life… You didn't seem to have any trouble the last time."

"Bo, stop…." Hope sighed, "You know that's not true."

"Why is Marlena being dragged into this?" Bo yelled, "She isn't family. She doesn't need to know."

"Your sister thinks you need to see her…" Hope stated carefully, "She can help you through this."

"So you guys think I'm crazy." Bo's voice dripped with hurt and disgust.

Hope stared at him. He was a wreck. She could see the flames of hurt and rage flickering in his eyes. She hated being the one under fire, but he didn't have another target. She tried to keep her emotions in check.

"I don't think you're crazy," Hope replied calmly, "I just think you've been through a lot."

Bo believed her, but he couldn't help himself. He was pushing her away. He was so angry. He was angry at everything. He thought coming home would solve all of his problems, but it seemed his world was still crumbling down.

"I want to be alone." Bo crossed his arms over his chest and turned his head away from her. He wasn't strong enough to watch the hurt cloud her eyes.

"Brady…." Hope whispered and reached for his forearm. She jumped when he pulled away from her. Tears threatened her eyes. Confusion overwhelmed her.

"Get. Out." Bo almost yelled through gritted teeth. His jaw locked. His mind raced. He didn't watch her retreat out of the room. He just heard the door softly close before he began punching his pillow. He screamed as he struck the fluffy object, twisting and squeezing it until his biceps shook. Tears erupted from his eyes. He couldn't take it. He felt helpless. He fell back into the bed and let his tears run their course.