Adventure Time is the property of Cartoon Network and Hazbin Hotel is the creation of Vivienne M. Medrano aka Vivziepop. With that said, Enjoy.

Chapter 24: The Long Goodbye

By the time everyone got back to the Hotel, Vaggie and Marceline only had about 18 ½ hours left before the powers that be forced them out of Hell and this Universe forever. With that in mind, the Fallen Angel decided, with her wife's full support, that she would spend these final hours alone with Charlie. And while I could easily relate to you how these crazy kids spent their last precious moments together, I believe doing so would be a violation of privacy and would cheapen the sentiment of the occasion. So for their sake, I shall skip ahead to the end.

It was around 10:30 in the morning, and no one had gotten much sleep last night. Charlie and Vaggie had their own personal reasons, of course, but in the case of the Vampire Queen, this bout of insomnia was due to an intense feeling of guilt. Largely because she felt responsible for triggering the chain of events that had led to this sad conclusion, but also because a part of her was actually glad it turned out this was. Now she wouldn't have to return home emptyhanded. Now she could have the wife she'd always wanted without endangering the lives of her friends; even if one of them did betray her without even batting an eye. Yes, things had certainly worked out in Marceline's favor.

And how sick is that?

How could it have come to this?

How, with only love as her guide, had her noble quest become so twisted and warped?

What sort of Higher Power would allow her to achieve such happiness at the expense of someone she'd once sworn to honor and protect?

For a moment, she wondered if Prismo had known this would be the outcome from the start.

Regardless, the time to leave was nearly upon them, only about 22 minutes left to go, and Marceline was waiting by the front desk for her beloved bride to finish saying her goodbyes. Niffty, who had been filled in on the whole ordeal the night before, was sitting close beside her; glaring daggers at her with her one big eye. Which was understandable, she supposed, since the little maniac had put so much time and effort into helping Vaggie get back together with Charlie, only for the former to end up with someone else.

Angel, Crymini and the others were still out partying, and Alastor hadn't been seen since yesterday, so for the time being it was just the two of them.

Talk about awkward.

"Listen, Niffty." The Vampire Queen said in an attempt to ease some of the tension. "I'm really sor…"

But her apology was abruptly cut off when the smaller demon held up her right index finger; a clear indication of a desire for silence.

"Understand this, I am willing to accept this situation only because I know there's nothing I can do to change it. But that doesn't mean I have to like it. So I don't want to hear any of your token apologies." Niffty said in an unsettlingly placid tone. "Now, you seem to make my sweet little Vaggie-Poo very happy, so for her sake I'll support this relationship. But just so you know, if you ever do anything to hurt my precious Angel Baby, I will sense it. And I will find you. And I will squish you."

Despite the obvious difference in size and power, as well as the fact that traveling between multiverses was next to impossible without permission, Marceline had spent enough time in Hell to be wary of the one-eyed demon's threat. So, just to be on the safe side…

"I understand. And I promise, I'll take good care of Vaggie. After all, she's my little Baby Doll."

Niffty said nothing, but the use of that pet name seemed to calm her down considerably; at least on the outside.

Not long after that, and with still 18 minutes to spare, Charlie and Vaggie entered the lobby; holding hands for what would most likely be the last time. Once again, the Vampire Queen felt an intense surge of guilt mixed with a strange sense of joy in knowing that Vaggie would soon be hers forever. It was all so terribly confusing.

"So… are you guys, uh… okay?" she asked uncomfortably.

"Yeah…" replied Charlie.

"As okay as we'll ever be." Said Vaggie.

"Listen, Charlie, I am so sorr…"

"Marcy, please, don't." the Demon Princess interrupted. "This is sad enough as it is without one last heartfelt apology. Besides, I don't blame you for this. You were just lonely and you wanted to stop when you realized what you were doing was wrong. The only people I blame for this are Alastor and my Dad."

Hearing this made Marceline feel a bit better.

"But, if you really want to make it up to me, then promise me one thing." Charlie continued, sounding much more confident than she probably felt. "Promise me that you'll take good care of Vaggie. I know she acts tough, but she's really sweet and sensitive and she needs a lot of love and attention. But not too much, she doesn't like being smothered. And don't ever call her 'cucaracha'. Trust me, she really doesn't like that. I only knew a few words of Spanish when we first started dating, so I didn't know what that word actually meant. It got really ugly. Also, she's allergic to pollen, so don't buy her any flowers. Buy her chocolates, she loves those. Oh, and even though she says she isn't into butt stuff…"

"I get the point." The Vampire Queen cut her; both for her own sake and for Vaggie's, who was currently blushing like a schoolgirl in a locker room. "And you have my word. Vaggie will never feel unloved as long as she's with me. Hell, I'm crazy about her. If things were a little different this would be the best day of my life."

"I figured as much. But listen, even if this isn't how you pictured it, I'd count this as a happy ending, for you at least. So don't worry about me and just enjoy your new life with the woman you love. And if you still don't think you deserve her, then work on yourself until you do. That's all I've ever asked of any of my guests."

"I'll do my best." She said, allowing herself to smile a little. "Speaking of guests, what are you gonna tell the others?"

"Sigh. I don't know." Charlie admitted. "I might tell them the truth, or I might make up something easier to believe. It all depends on how I feel when they come back… if they come back."

"I'm sure they'll show up sooner or later. All their stuff is here." The Vampire Queen said jokingly, before taking on a more serious tone. "Look, I know he betrayed us for selfish reasons, but try to go easy on Blitz when you see him. Okay? He's not all bad. He's just… a product of his upbringing. I mean, he was born in Hell for Christ's sake."

"So was I, but you don't see me selling out my friends for a fast buck." The Demon Princess replied. "Look, I'm not gonna kill him, if that's what you mean, but other than that I make no promises."

"Sigh. I guess that's the best I can hope for." Marceline said somberly. "Only nine minutes left."

"How can you tell?"

"I don't know, I can just… feel it somehow. Must be Prismo's doing, I guess."

"I see… Well, maybe you two should, you know, get together now. So you'll be ready when whatever's supposed to happen happens."

"I guess that makes sense." The Vampire Queen admitted.

And with that, she moved away from the front desk to stand beside her beautiful bride.

"So… I guess this is it." She said as she put an arm around Vaggie's shoulder.

"Yeah, I guess so." The Fallen Angel replied in a bitter-sweet tone.

"So, did you uh… say everything you needed to?"

"Yeah, I think Charlie and I are as good as we're gonna get."

"Good…. Good…." She said awkwardly, before taking notice of her wife's rather small, pinkish-red backpack. "Is that all you're bringing?"

"Uh-huh, I just grabbed a couple of my favorite outfits and a few other things. Figured I'd pack lite for the trip and buy new stuff once I'm settled in."

"Well, then I hope I can persuade you to take something extra." Said a new, vaguely familiar voice from a short distance away.

Everyone quickly spun around and, to their collective astonishment, they saw the Queen of Hell herself, Lilith Magne, standing by the front door; looking ashamed and disheartened.

"Mom? What are you doing here?" Charlie asked confusedly.

"I'm sorry for just barging in unannounced, but I stopped by to give the girls a little going away present, and to offer you, my dear, my most sincerest apology."

"Apology for what? This was all Dad's fault, not yours."

"Not exactly, Darling. You see, your father was willing to wait until you'd worked this latest fad out of your system, no offense, but I was too impatient. I was so desperate to have you back home where it was safe that I cut him off from any form of affection, to try and force him to bring you home. And… well, you've seen the result."

"Oh, Mom. I don't blame you for this." The Demon Princess said sincerely. "You were just worried about me. Dad is… well, he's just an asshole who enjoys watching people suffer, and no sane person would even think about doing what he did, no matter what the circumstances. So don't beat yourself up over this."

"Thank you, Darling. You have no idea how much I needed to hear you say that." Lilith replied warmly. "But listen, I know it may not seem like it, but in his own twisted way, your father really does love you."

"I know that, but I still never want to see him again." Charlie said sternly, before softly adding. "How is he?"

"About as well as can be expected, considering he was castrated by his own daughter." The Queen answered awkwardly. "Right now he's on so much pain medication he probably hasn't even realized I've gone."

"I figured as much. But listen, as long as he's not with you, you're welcome to visit anytime you want. You know, if you want to."

"I'd like that, sweetheart. I'd like that very much." Lilith said with a smile before turning towards the 'happy couple'. "As for you two, there is no apology I can give that would be satisfactory after what my husband put you through, at least not in the short time remaining. So in lieu of one, I wish you both the best of luck in your new life together, and offer you this as a token of my goodwill."

From seemingly out of nowhere, the Queen of Hell produced a small glass beaker full of a mysterious red liquid.

"Uh… thank you, Your Highness." Vaggie said politely as she accepted the strange container. "What is it?"

"It's a special potion I've been preparing for some time. It was supposed to be a wedding present for you and Charlie." Lilith explained. "One mouthful will reverse the gender of whomever drinks it for seventy-two hours. You know, just in case you ever decide you want children."

Vaggie blushed, but thanked the Queen nonetheless; tucking the bottle away in her backpack for safekeeping.

Marceline said nothing, her mind was too fixated on their impeding departure.

Only five minutes left.

Whether she could read it on her face or just sense it, the Vampire Queen wasn't sure, but somehow Charlie seemed to guess what she was thinking and approached the two of them for what would very likely be the last time.

"How much time left?" the Demon Princess asked while attempting to mask the dread in her voice.

"Less than five minutes." Marceline replied solemnly.

"Oh, I see." She said before shifting focus onto Vaggie. "Look, Vaggie, I know we said we weren't gonna have a long, drawn out goodbye, but… I don't know, I just feel like I should say something meaningful before you go."

"Eh, talk is cheap." The Fallen Angel replied. "But if you really wanna do something, then show me how tough you are and don't make a fuss when I go. Okay?"

"Okay." Charlie replied, perking herself up a bit. "But hey, I know it may not seem like it now, but I'd call this a Happily Ever After for you. I mean, you may not have gotten the big wedding you've always wanted, but you'll still get to be the wife of a Queen, and live in a palace, and be a real life Princess. Oh~ It's just like a fairytale~"

Briefly, Marceline considered telling Charlie the truth. That her tittle as Vampire Queen was more of a stage name than anything else, and that she lived alone in a small house in a cave with only a zombie poodle for company. However, a quick sideways glance from her new wife made her reconsider.

Why burden the poor girl with unnecessary facts right now? Afterall, it was a harmless fantasy that would probably help her get through this troubled time. So instead she simply told her,

"I promise you, as long as I'm alive, Vaggie will never want for anything; especially love."

90 seconds left.

"That's all I could ever hope for." The Demon Princess said with a smile. "But hey, before you go, there's one thing I have to know."

"Sure, what is it?"

"Are there really rainbow unicorns where you live?"

"Uh, yeah. I mean, we call them rainicorns. But they're real. Kinda weird though, they all speak Korean for some reason. Never really understood that. But they're cool, I guess."

"Wow~"

45 seconds…

"It's almost time, Charlie." Vaggie told her, apparently able to sense it as well. "I guess this is goodbye."

"Oh, Vaggie…"

25 seconds…

"But before I go, I just want you to know, that in spite of everything that's happened, if I had to do it all over again, I would still choose you over Heaven. No question."

12 seconds…

"And even if Alastor wasn't lying, and someday I completely lose all my feelings for you…"

6 seconds…

"I just want you to know that in this moment, right now, I lo…"

And in a flash of glorious golden radiance, they were gone.

End Notes:

Only two chapters to go.

Thanks for reading and I'll see you in the next one.

Peace.