AU! No war.
"Look what my sign says!" Lavender wailed as she placed her copy of Witch Weekly on the table and sat down beside Parvati.
Parvati picked up the magazine and read out loud, "If you feel tired, Taurus, you may need to close your eyes and listen to soothing music. You work hard most of the time, so do your body and mind some good and just relax and listen to your favourite music. Even a few minutes will make a difference. You can always use the quiet time to plan if you feel you need to accomplish something."
"Not that, read my love horoscope, Paro!"
"You may find that your closest relationship seems to be fraught with an aura of chilliness. The planetary alignment indicates that you have to work extra hard to try and find out what the problem is. It is possibly some kind of memory of a past event that is triggering the problem. Use your warmth to try and melt the ice. Things will feel a lot better later," Parvati read out loud and placed the magazine down on the table. "This means—"
"Yeah, I need to try and get Won-Won to warm up to me again. We're having problems and I think the horoscope's right…"
"What are you going to do then?" Parvati asked curiously. She knew Lavender was always serious when it came to her love life, and if her horoscope said that she needed to work extra hard, she wasn't going to stop until she had solved the problem.
"I'm thinking of asking him to go on a date with me — someplace in the castle where people won't find us so easily. What do you think?"
"That's a good idea. Maybe you could use the Room of Requirement to make the date extra romantic," Parvati suggested hopefully. She was a hopeless romantic just like her best friend, Lavender Brown.
"Yes! That would be great! Maybe I could show him my room…" Lavender and Parvati both giggled at the implications.
"Ooh, I'll read mine now!" Parvati said excitedly as she picked up the magazine again. "Gemini, Gemini… Oh, here it is! Don't be surprised if your mind goes a thousand miles a second today, Gemini. Slowing down will be difficult, and you'll have to find a way to express what's in your head. The planetary aspects lend strength to communication. Perhaps talking out your ideas or writing to someone whose insight you value will help. Even doodling can give you a place to put your thoughts."
"You already doodle so much," Lavender said, amused by her friend's horoscope.
"Now I have a valid reason to doodle," Parvati said with a hearty laugh.
"Lavender, what are you doing?" Ron asked as he sat down beside her on the couch in the Gryffindor common room.
"It's the new Witch Weekly issue," Lavender explained, her head buried in her magazine. "I'm reading my horoscope."
"You believe in that stuff?" Ron rolled his eyes, thinking why had he even asked her that. "It's all ridiculous!"
"It is not ridiculous! Look at your horoscope and you'll know it's true!" She shoved the magazine in his hands and forced him to read his horoscope.
"What is Aries? What kind of name is Sagittarius? This sounds like bollocks to me," Ron muttered as he read the page.
"You were born in March, right? So your zodiac sign is Pisces — there, read that part," Lavender said, pointing to the Pisces section.
Ron read it out loud, "You might find that someone close to you needs a hand today, Pisces. They could be too proud to ask for help. Don't let that stop you. If you see a situation in which you can help, do it. Don't wait for an invitation or request. Simply assess the situation and do what you can. Your efforts will be appreciated, and you'll feel good about making a difference." He looked at Lavender and frowned. "This is really vague, isn't it? I mean anyone could need help, that doesn't mean it's —"
"It's not vague! It's made for your sign. And I'm sure you'll find someone who needs your help today," Lavender said, taking the magazine back from Ron and turning the page to show him his love horoscope. "Look at what they say about your love-life… You have many choices today, but the celestial configuration indicates that one particular choice is important. It concerns the decision about whether you can bridge the gap and make a move toward someone you have become a little estranged from. You seem to be frightened by thoughts of what the outcome may be, but you would do better to seize the moment and just say it. All will be well."
"I didn't understand a word of what you just said, but I'll take your word for it," Ron said, starting to get up. Lavender grabbed his arm and yanked him back down.
"Ron, who's the one you're feeling estranged from?" she demanded, her blue eyes gleaming with anger. "You better not be cheating on me or else I'll turn you into a toad!"
Ron paled at her threat and cried, "No, I'm not cheating on you! Lavender, you'd believe a horoscope over me?"
"Yes, because it never lies!" Lavender shrieked as she jumped to her feet and stormed out of the common room.
Ron groaned and stood up to follow her out; he might have the emotional range of a teaspoon, but he knew when to go after a girl to comfort her. He wandered through the corridors calling out to her, looking through the classrooms and alcoves just in case she was hiding from him.
"Malfoy, I'm going to hex your skinny little arse if you don't stop pestering me!" Hermione yelled angrily.
Ron turned around the corner and found Hermione pressed up against the wall, Draco's arms on either side of her head. Ron yelled, "Get back, Malfoy!" He didn't wait for Draco to step back; he raised his wand and cast a Stinging Hex at Malfoy's bottom.
"Ouch! Weasley! You utter moron!" Draco roared as he stumbled back from Hermione. Hermione watched with amusement as Draco pulled out his wand and hexed Ron in return.
"Stop it, you two…" Hermione trailed off as the two boys refused to back down and started to hex each other. Spells flew off their hastily-formed shields and hit the surrounding walls. The students passing by ducked and shrieked as the spells whizzed past their ears. Hermione groaned and covered herself with a strong Protego as she scampered to help the other students.
"What is the meaning of this?" Snape hissed as he walked into the midst of their duel.
Ron watched in horror as his stray Stinging Hex hit Snape's arse. Snape whirled around and grabbed Ron by his ear. "Detention for the rest of the year, Mr Weasley — and hundred points off of Gryffindor for your stupidity."
Ron yowled as Snape dragged him off by his ear and Draco flipped him off from his spot near the wall. Hermione covered her face with her hands and muttered, "You two are idiots…"
As Snape dragged him away, Ron thought, 'In a way, Lav-Lav was right. I did help Mione out and I did what I should… Maybe that stupid horoscope was kind of right."
"Tell me what my horoscope says for today," Ron demanded as he hurried over to Lavender outside Transfiguration class.
Lavender looked at him suspiciously and asked, "Why do you want to know? So you can make fun of it again?"
"No, yesterday I helped Mione out with Malfoy and I did feel good about it — even though I got detention with Snape for the rest of the year and I lost a hundred points…"
Lavender beamed at him and said, "See? I told you it was right! Let's see then… Here, your horoscope says 'Step out of your usual role, Pisces. Doing this now and then can add knowledge and expand your life. The day's planetary aspects favour such growth. Your willingness to walk a different path can give you far more than you imagine. Try something you've never considered before. Go to a new place. Change your desk around. See what you can discover about yourself and the world.' And your love horoscope says Friends, partners, and family are in a rebellious mood today, and will not be trying to put on any kind of front or façade for your peace of mind. The celestial configuration means that they are upfront, loud, and sassy, and you may wish you could disown them. But you too may need to take a page from their book. Be honest yourself, instead of trying to please everyone."
Ron thought for a few moments and said, "Harry did seem to be in a bad mood today… Maybe I should steer clear of him for a while."
"Yeah, let me check his horoscope. Maybe we'll understand why he's so crabby today." Lavender flicked through the pages and found Harry's horoscope. "Here, it says that You have a lot to come to terms with today. The day's planetary configuration indicates you can either listen to those around you who are moaning about how unhappy they are with their lot in life, or you can leap up, forget your miseries and restrictions, and join in with a small group of people, if possible, who are determined to have fun and excitement. Go where your heart truly is."
Ron nodded solemnly and said, "Give me the magazine, I'll show it to Harry."
Lavender kissed Ron's cheek and said, "I'm so proud of you, Won-Won! You're trying to help Harry, that's so sweet of you!"
Ron's face reddened at her praise and he said, "I just don't want him to feel bad. He's always so grouchy these days…"
Lavender smiled and said, "I think you're brilliant, Won-Won! Go, show it to him."
Ron walked away with the magazine in hand, intent on sharing it with Harry. He found Harry and Hermione hurrying towards their Charms class. He called out, "Hey, guys! Wait up! Look what I found!"
"Ron, I'm not interested in horoscopes," Harry said with a groan when Ron showed him the heading. "It's all shite!"
"No, it's not! Look, your horoscope says that you have been sitting on the fence, not sure whether to jump in and make that commitment today. The planetary configuration today is bringing you some questions to seriously consider before you make that all-important decision. Take some time to think through whether you can be yourself or whether you are pretending. Don't act until you feel sure; it is a big commitment... Tell me if this is true or not!" Ron cried, his eyes wide with excitement.
"What decision is he talking about, Harry?" Hermione frowned when she saw the look of surprise in Harry's eyes.
"I… was thinking of not becoming an Auror," Harry admitted quietly.
"See? That's a huge decision!" Ron exclaimed excitedly. He shoved the magazine in Hermione's hands and said, "Read yours. You're a Virgo, Mione."
"I know my zodiac sign, but I don't believe in this crap, Ron… It's all fake and —"
"It says here that today you have the feeling of being restricted by either a person or circumstances. The planetary configuration is making it difficult for you to feel at ease or at home in a certain situation. You wish you could speak out about it, but somehow cannot bring yourself to do it. You need to be true to yourself, despite the consequences. It will be better in the long run. The influence of the planets has you feeling very in sync with the one you love, which is a situation you can surely enjoy today. Do things together that you both enjoy, as these activities will create a lasting bond and much goodwill between you," Harry read her horoscope. "Hey, Mione, aren't you partnering up with Malfoy today for that huge Arithmancy project you've been raving about?"
"That doesn't mean I'm in love with Malfoy!"
"Did you just say you're in love with me?" Draco called out from behind, materializing out of the shadows all of a sudden. He had a wicked smirk on his face and his eyes glinted with excitement.
"No, I said I'm —"
"Enjoy your day together, both of you!" Harry cackled loudly as he grabbed Ron's arm and dragged him away. Hermione yelled at him to come back, but Harry pretended he hadn't heard her.
"I can't believe you left Mione behind like that!" Ron gasped, his eyes wide with shock.
"Did you read Malfoy's horoscope. It says that there has to be a very good reason why you haven't been able to be honest with someone close to you. This is being highlighted today by the planetary configuration. There is a good reason why you may have felt that you can't speak openly, but if you are to be happy, you need to be able to talk about what is stopping you from being completely truthful." He showed the magazine to Ron and smirked. "Do you know what that means?"
"Does this mean that Malfoy is"-Ron swallowed nervously- "in love with Mione?"
"He's definitely interested in her, at the very least. Maybe he'll be a Gryffindor for once and say something nice to her," Harry said with a laugh.
"It's Malfoy — he'll mess up either way," Ron said, snickering at the thought.
"I don't know if the horoscopes are right or not, but thanks for cheering me up, Ron," Harry said, smiling as he patted Ron's arm.
"You're welcome, Harry. Just think about your decision before you do anything," Ron suggested.
Ron didn't know if the horoscopes were true or just a matter of coincidence, but he had started to believe them. He had seen Parvati fall down the stairs and break her arm, and Lavender had confided in Ron that her horoscope had said she would get hurt if she didn't wear something purple. Ron decided to keep an eye on his horoscope, not wanting to take it lightly and get injured. It was better to be safe than sorry.
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