Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans or Jackie Chan Adventures. Thank goodness – if I had been in charge, the networks would never have touched them!
Betaed by: Zim'smostloyalservant
A Shadow of the Titans:
Written by
Nocturne no Kitsune
Eduard Kassel
Chapter Six
'Making Your Mark'
Kryptonite
As usual, the HIVE mess hall and food court was bustling. Even the more mechanical students, who had no need for it, were taking time to socialize or plot, sometimes both at the same time. And as usual, Jade ended up sitting with her team trying to tune it all out.
Jade was reading a less-than-ancient mystic scroll as she crunched on a mayo-free BLT. The plate to her side was stacked with various sandwiches; she had felt like sandwiches today. It was uncanny how quick she was taking it for granted how she could get whatever she wanted within reason at any meal. She wondered not for the first time if her appetite was part of being a Shadowkhan or her own big eater tendencies cut loose?
Scowling, she hopped up in her chair to smack Mammoth's hand away from an onion-free tuna salad sandwich. Onions were bad for her, she had realized; how bad she wasn't sure, but her nose was keen on them and the reaction was to keep them away.
"Hey," Mammoth growled, shaking his hand. She packed a good punch he noted; not good enough against him, of course, but even after the entrance exam it was easy to forget the squirt was no paper wizard.
"Get your own food," Jade spat at him, snatching the sandwich in question and scarfing it whole.
"What are you complaining about? I've seen you eat wood and metal, like you're part goat," Jinx remarked, swiping a sandwich.
"Drop it," Jade managed, after forcing the mostly chewed sandwich down her throat. Jinx held it out over the floor, and dropped it with a plop. Jade blinked, leaning over the table to confirm the sandwich was indeed resting on the immaculate white tiles.
Jinx answered her glare with an unconcerned shrug. Jade reached out and the sandwich floated into the air and moved into her hand. She took a huge bite, nearly half the sandwich, eyes gleaming with victory. She tried to say something about the five-second rule but it was incoherent around the literal mouthful.
"Like I said, a little blue goat," Jinx smiled. Jade frowned at that, and glanced back to her scroll.
Her lab had been rebuilt, but her progress was slow. What she could find on mystic dimensional travel was… well, beyond her. It was like it was in another language it was so advanced.
Sadly it seemed even she couldn't leap to what appeared to be, a less than insignificant, peak in magic wielding. She would need to take the stairs, but darn if she wasn't going to take them three at a time! Such as this old study by some Chinese wizard who had tried and failed to revive chi sorcery during the 1890s.
Still, that meant she had to stay in the HIVE's good graces, which meant a lot of time spent studying other subjects and otherwise interacting with students. She had discovered she was not well liked. Apparently her reclusive tendencies – like there was anything worth doing here besides planning to get out – had gotten her labeled as an "arrogant overachiever".
The fact she had gotten good/bad press in such a short time that upper classmen had yet to match did not endear her either. They were jerks, Jade had decided, like the people up top in Jump City, all making assumptions about her off the cuff.
But Jinx was hard to peg, she had to admit. Mammoth was no secret, and Gizmo was nothing but a travel sized annoyance with lots of unwanted bonus features. The witch, on the other hand… she had passed up a golden chance to humiliate her, only to do stuff like just now with the sandwich.
Not to mention Jinx had the same arrogant overachiever label, she had learned.
And Gadjo was a deliberate enigma – she was certain he did it on purpose. She had seen him nearby, still no camo girl, happily eating enough food for a feast. One thing was certain – Jade's instincts told her whatever came of her mixing with that guy, it would be big. And in her current situation there seemed to be no escape from that inevitable destination. And honestly, part of her wanted to see just what would happen when that weird fruit fell off the branch.
'It shouldn't matter; I'm a good guy, they're bad guys, that settles it all real neatly. I just need to focus on getting out of here,' she reminded herself. Which meant getting home; the Titans were just a step toward that goal.
The fact she was thinking that last sandwich would have been better with some hard wood chips or steel shavings did not bode well for her state of mind.
She was so split between focus on the scroll and introspection she did not notice the first piece of food fly after an argument nearby got too rough.
It had been just one of the many pointless arguments that degenerated into a scuff of some kind. It would likely have stayed just that if that bit of jello had not hit Mammoth square in the face. Perhaps it managed to hit him off guard because there was no hostile intent for him to pick up on. Maybe his mind did not register dessert as a threat, or more likely he just had no guard up at all.
Either way, irritated at having to get up for more food, having been blocked by a shrimp rookie, he took the hit with a little less than good grace. Wiping off his face with one hand, he stood up and spotted a punk-style villain arguing with a girl who looked like a glam rocker.
Grabbing up Gizmo's plate of inconsiderable crap the giant let it fly. The plate hit the rocker in the back of the head. But it had flipped, dumping its contents on another student, who returned fire with an apple Mammoth caught and took a bite out of.
The offended teen did not let it end there, grabbing up a piece of gravy-dripping chicken and letting it fly. Mammoth did not reach for it as he saw where it was going. It landed smack on Zhu Chan's scroll.
Her jaw hit the table.
"Hah! You like that!" the assailant called out, seemingly ignoring the fact he had missed his target. The piece of chicken hit him in the face hard enough to send him crashing back into the two people sitting next to him.
A gathering of villains always being a powder keg, alliances were invoked, vengeance was opted to be taken, or simply cause trouble for the heck of it, a food fight kicked up in less than a minute with edibles filling the air.
Gadjo was seemingly oblivious, focused on slicing up a peach pie into perfect quarters with a steak knife. Executing the act with surprising precision, he tossed the knife in the air to catch the blade between his ring and middle finger.
Then a glob of vanilla ice cream nailed him in the eye as the unofficial forcefield around him was apparently brought down.
"Hmm?" he intoned, getting the nearby students' attention.
"Hmmm! ?" he rumbled, making them step back as the flung food began to thin.
"HMMM ah! Al la mode, very nice!" he cheered, scooping the ice cream off his face and slapping it down on a piece of pie. As the psycho began to cheerfully eat his dessert, the food fight picked back up again.
Under her table, Jade snarled through her teeth, trying to wipe the grease from the scroll. Stupid, stupid, stupid! Right in the middle of a big chunk of text even! Listening to the food fight rising in volume only made her growl in irritation.
"Idiots!" she growled.
"Why not use your telekinesis?" Jinx asked. Jade's head snapped up; sure enough, Jinx was sitting on the floor with her, hair horns pressed back by the table.
"Use your power to lift the grease away," Jinx reiterated. Jade scowled at her, but put a hand over the besmirched section of the scroll. Not all of the grease came away into a little ball, but now the scroll just had a discoloration rather than an indecipherable stain. Jade glared at the salvaged knowledge and glanced to Jinx, who was eating a familiar looking rye sandwich.
"Is that mine?" Jade asked.
"Yeah, I swiped it before taking cover," Jinx said before pulling out a book on lair improvement, on a budget. Jade looked at the cover showing a trap door and a dollar sign, then shrugged, returning to her own reading.
Later, Jump City:
Jade was bored. She was sitting in the back of a fake laundry van, with a pink haired Goth witch, some kind of Bigfoot super soldier, and she was bored. She had also eaten all the salty snacks and bought Mammoth's off of him. So now she resorted to… reading the contents of her school mail.
Frowning, she lowered the brochure adorned with the HIVE crest to look at her teammates. Mammoth was snoring lightly while sleeping, while Jinx was using a game toy with what was likely RPG music coming from it. Yes, definitely a crack squad of clear and present threats to the good people of Jump City.
No wonder the Titans could get away with acting stupid.
"So, Seminar Day, are they serious?" she asked. Jinx's eyes lifted from her game while Mammoth snorted awake and scratched his cheek.
"Yes, though it's better than it sounds," Jinx admitted.
"Like any real villains would actually come and give a lecture for whatever Blood is willing to pay," Zhu rolled her eyes.
"It's not about celebrities Zhu. Two years ago I went to one on making your hair reflect your inner evil. Changed my life," Mammoth nodded solemnly.
"Yeah, they are mostly real villains too, not retirees or bad guys that couldn't do so they decided to teach," Jinx recalled.
"Like Blood?" Zhu asked. They all shared a chuckle at that, though Jinx and Mammoth didn't quite suppress a nervous glance around.
"Anyway, rookies have to go to the lecture on F.W.A.," Jinx smiled.
"FWA?" Zhu asked, eyebrow rising.
"Oh yeah! I can't believe I forgot that one, it's essential," Mammoth grinned. Zhu was about to press the matter when an explosion rocked the van.
"Looks like Gizmo is ready for us – commence operation!" Jinx ordered, stashing her handheld as she stood up.
HIVE:
Jackie had often scolded her for treating life like it was a movie or something. What with how she warmed to the lifestyle of globetrotting adventurer and regularly rubbing elbows with secret agents. The fact was he hated it, almost as much as she loved it.
She had hoped he would warm up to it; to her mind, an exciting life was the best kind and his desire for boring normalcy weird. No, she had known for a long time that she was the strange one – her parents and the other kids had reminded her of that more often, and less nicely, than Uncle Jackie.
At times she had thought she must have been born into the wrong time, or world. That she was meant for a more vibrant place, that there she would fit in and thrive.
Someone somewhere was saying something about being careful what you wish for, she just knew it!
Yet at the same time there were some things it seemed she couldn't escape. Like corny school events attempting to be cool, for example.
The wide hallway opening into several lecture halls was full of booths, and banners hung over the doorways.
It was just more proof anything could be made lame with enough effort. She thought she had actually seen a real estate agency offering deals for lairs! Surely not.
Yes, there was one on minion management. There was one on being the most valued lackey. The banners and signs seemed to be getting worse:
"Redshirts and how to not be one."
"Having Your Cake And Stealing Another Two."
"Me, Myself, and I Agree: How to make Multiple Personalities Work for you in 12 Simple Steps."
"Empowering Mutations: Maximizing the Monster."
"I Have A Nemesis: Now What?"
"Being Badass, On a Budget."
"Tyranny vs. Anarchy: Which is the Greater Evil?"
"When You Need An Evil Makeover."
"Maniacal Laughter: Essential or Nonsensical?"
They were required to attend this stuff; apparently it was school policy or something. Blood commanded and you had to at least give the appearance of obeying.
Jade had her hood pulled up – she had gotten into the habit of keeping it up and her face hidden outside her room. People were less inclined to talk to her this way.
Keeping track of her through the colorful crowd of mingling villains would be hard. She was walking rather than floating, trying to grab the shadows to fade in and out of sight.
She hadn't come close to reaching her goal of going completely invisible moving in the crowd like this, but it was something to do.
'I suppose these guys actually wanting to be villains makes it interesting for them. Is it so much to be left alone to work on my magic so I can get out of here?' she wondered, fondly picturing her darkened living quarters and her expensively rebuilt lab.
Letting herself slip fully into sight, she walked up to a door with the banner she had been looking for, "F.W.A.: Reality?"
"That is not a good sign," she mumbled, looking at the one word question.
Her watch confirmed it was almost time for the event to start. The watch was irritatingly normal; she would have preferred something with a funny character. But she was working on a budget here!
'When I get home I will never complain about Uncle ranting on the bills versus profit stuff again,' she promised as she slipped into the lecture hall. Sliding into an otherwise vacant row, she settled down, trying to get comfortable in the metal seat.
"I never did figure out what that acronym stands for," she realized, noticing how few people at all were in the hall.
A scrawny man wearing a porkpie hat, a white jacket, and red pants walked onto the stage where a table and stand had been set up. He set out a briefcase and rummaged through it, before looking at his audience, one by one.
'Those are crazy eyes,' she realized when he fixed her with a somewhat deranged stare.
"Greetings, fellow players on the stage. Kindly look to your right, now your left, over the shoulder, now the other, forward, down at your feet, and finally up," he ordered, looking around in the same manner. Jade stopped doing it after looking over her other shoulder. What the heck?
"You have just glanced at 'them'.
"Yes, they are always out there, except when they are not, of course! And by determining when, you become a puppet, with a hand on the string… that is on that same hand!" his volume increased erratically as he put up his first picture, upside down.
"Huh?" Jade asked the air.
"I have been around the bend, and come back again!" he proclaimed.
"Am I being hazed?" Jade asked. The crazy man started fanning himself with his hat as he set the contents of his own briefcase on fire with a tossed match.
A Nearby Lecture Hall:
Jinx jotted notes down in her book as the lecture continued. Minion Management was a vital and underrated field. True, she only had teammates so far, but she could already see some ways to adapt these tactics.
And as always, Jinx was looking at the big picture. One day she would have a killer base and a spot in the upper ranks of the most wanted lists. Mooks would be lining up to work for her, unless she started making her own! She had to be ready to take the helm on the day her ship came in.
"You set me up," Zhu Chan hissed into her ear.
"Gah!" Jinx sat bolt upright, rubbing her ear. She forced down the blush as everyone nearby glanced at her. Eye twitching, she realized Blue was short enough they couldn't see her over the chairs now that the girl was slouching.
"Shut up, it's tradition," she hissed back, trying to get back into the lecture. Jade frowned; she did not feel like letting the witch off the hook so easily. It was to be expected from a villain, she guessed, but she had been thinking Jinx was a bit cooler than the rest.
"I won't shut up – I had to escape a room with a lunatic who thinks he's on a giant stage throwing burning paper Mache rabbits everywhere!" Zhu exclaimed under her breath.
"And here is an example of the dire consequences when you fail to properly understand your subordinates," the cloaked masked man on stage said as the lights on the stage darkened and a screen descended and switched on.
"Hey, I think I've seen that guy's cousin!" Zhu perked up. Jinx slapped her over the head and made a shushing gesture. Then offered a grin to the glaring other students. She was tempted to blast the blue girl just to show them what was going on.
"Wawawahhh! Mortals, your era comes to an end!" the squid headed man in the tasteless cinnamon robes laughed. Jinx rolled her eyes; honestly, how many times a decade was the world supposed to end as part of some ancient prophecy, she wondered as squid man went on. Surely they had to be running out of ancient prophecies?
As he explained about the all devouring something-or-other, its inevitability, the various impotencies of the heroes who were apparently attacking his base, the camera pulled out. Revealing…
"Gadjo?" Jinx and Zhu exclaimed in tandem.
"You owe me a soda," Zhu smirked while Jinx watched Gadjo yawn and scratch his rear while his apparent boss monologued. He perked up when squid man mentioned the devourer, eating all those not marked under his totem.
"What about the bakers? !" Gadjo asked.
"They will be slowly devoured in his stomach of doom for 657 years amusing him with their wails of suffering. Like everyone else!" the squid man yelled, clearly upset at being interrupted. Gadjo cut him off before he could get back to his rant, looking spooked.
"But then who will be making the pies? !" Gadjo demanded frantically.
"Fool! There will be no pie in the Era of the Supreme and Profane C-URK!" the squid man ranted before being cut off. A stony faced Gadjo had walked up behind him, and grabbed his head. It was apparently invertebrate, with how he squeezed the head, making the red eyes bug out a bit as it sputtered ink and blood, tentacles flapping.
"NO ONE MESSES WITH THE PIE WHILE GADJO IS AROUND!" the villainous Romany screamed, veins threatening to pop in his forehead.
Twisttwisttwisttwist
*Snap*
*Rip*
*Pop*
*Toss*
*Punt*
After Gadjo kicked the squid man's head, for a second it filled the screen, and then it gave way to static with a shattering sound. Zhu and Jinx watched the static slack-jawed.
"And that, young evil overlords in training, is the value of background checks and psychiatric evaluations on your underlings," the lecturer announced.
"I'm going to go throw up now," Zhu said.
"Take me with you, I think I'm done here," Jinx ordered, putting a hand on Zhu's head. They both sank into the shadows as he started to talk on the most brutal and efficient ways to crush a mutiny.
Jump City, East-West Mall, Two Days Later:
"Why are we attacking the mall again?" Zhu asked as she blew up a hot dog stand with a Dragon blast. It wasn't the same stand of course, but as long as she had to act like a villain…
"You know, if you actually listened to the briefings, you wouldn't have to ask that," Jinx told her, hands on hips.
"Well excuse me for being bored!" Zhu huffed.
"More like bored and dumb, little miss combustion," Gizmo laughed, firing off a round of lasers, making something blow up out of Jade's line of sight.
"Hey, I'm recreating an ancient and complete system of magic from memory, explosions are to be expected!" Zhu Chan yelled at him, shaking her fist.
"Listen, this is just a run of the mill 'excuse crime' so we can fight the Titans," Jinx cut them off before they could get going.
"But a food court?" Zhu demanded, gesturing at their sunny surroundings.
"Mammoth was hungry," Jinx shrugged. Mammoth sat on the counter of some gyro place, taking bits from the pilfered meat on a spit. He gave them a thumbs-up.
"When the Titans show up they are so going to make some crack about dessert," Jade predicted.
"Bet you five bucks you're wrong witch girl, it will be something about paying the check," Gizmo put in. Jinx put a hand to her face, before an explosion knocked the three villains apart.
"Here it comes," Jade groaned, hood thrown back and brushing dust out of her hair.
"Hope you saved room for dessert-" Beast Boy began.
"Ha, I knew it! Pay up Gizmo!" Zhu cheered.
"What?" Beast Boy asked, confused. Raven sighed and looked to Robin almost imploringly.
"Titans go!" he obliged.
The Titans attacked, Starfire being assailed by heli-drones Gizmo launched while Raven went straight for Jinx. Mammoth threw down his meat to meet Cyborg's charge. Leaving Jade to face Beast Boy and Robin as she stood on a white table. She cocked her head, noting how occupied everyone else was for the moment.
"I don't suppose we could talk for a moment?" she asked warily. The Titan boys exchanged looks before watching her even more intently. What? Did they think she was trying to get them to lower their guard just to spring a trap or something?
"Unless you're surrendering, I don't think there's too much to say, Zhu Chan," Robin remarked. Jade crossed her arms and huffed at that.
"Dial back that 'too cool' attitude, Boy Wonder. I'm not surrendering, I'm-" she began. She left the sentence hanging as a pair of serrated metal tentacles rose behind them. She saw the moment they realized something was wrong; Robin reacted quicker, dodging the first swipe only for a tentacle to wrap around his ankle and drag him across the court, upending tables. Beast Boy shrank from sight and disappeared.
"Maybe I am bad luck?" Zhu wondered. The table shifted under her feet, then jolted up into the air, sprawling her on top of it. A green ape held it over his head and threw it into the nearest column.
The table shattered on impact, but no blue girl fell with the debris. Smelling something burning, he looked around, then up. The blue girl was floating above him, with a fire filled hand and a scowl on her revealed face.
"That was rude," Zhu told him, firing the blast in her hand. He rolled away, morphing into a cheetah and going on the run. The swift cat wove through tables, chairs, and decorative plants, before they were blasted to pieces by the assault of fire blasts and heat beams.
Finally he leapt behind a food counter and out of sight. Zhu looked at the sign above it and gave a small chortle.
"Vegan Valley? Getting into your comfort zone grasshead? Okay, then hope you like your vegetables grilled!
"...
"Did I just make a food pun?" she demanded of herself, powering her attacks down. While she gazed off at the cliché, Beast Boy plopped a tray of vegetables on the counter and filled his hands.
"No, it wasn't a corny pun. It was a genuinely witty remark fitting the circumstance," Jade told herself. Then a head of lettuce burst against her shoulder.
"Wha?" she asked, before being pelted by carrots. Lowering her arms from her face, she saw Beast Boy winding up to throw another vegetable at her.
"What are you doing?" she demanded.
"Changing tactics, I don't have long distance attacks. So I'm improvising," he said.
"No, you're throwing vegetables at me! I mean really, what is the plan here? That I'm a 'carnivore' and that stuff will make me sick so I run away! ? Are you really this-" Jade demanded before he threw the onion he had been holding in her face.
Jade stood still, floating in the air as Beast Boy pumped a fist. Then she screamed.
"AAAAAAAHHHHH!" she screamed as her eyes foamed yellow.
"It HURTS, OH GOD IT HURTS! MY EYES ARE ON FIRE!" she screamed, dropping to the floor and running around.
Zhu continued to scream as she ran erratically across the ravaged food court, a bewildered Beast Boy watching her go. She ran past the grappling Cyborg and Mammoth, who stopped to watch her run past, then slam into a wall, start screaming again, and then finally disappear into a shadow on the wall.
They both looked at Beast Boy standing stunned behind the health food counter. Then he broke into a wide grin and held up an onion.
"I found her kryptonite!" he proclaimed.
Elsewhere?:
Jade hurled herself through the shadows, cursing in every language she knew as her eyes burned, trying to rub them clean with her torn off cloak.
She had always enjoyed the big "Nooo!" when a demon sorcerer went down. And she had liked to see Tarakudo get nailed with an onion and get sent running. It would seem karma had finally caught up to her enjoyment of others' suffering. Though she would be quick to point out that unlike her, they had it coming.
Of course this was in the back of her mind and would only come back to the fore later. For now, blinding pain preoccupied her, and a need for relief guided her through the shadows, as she lacked a clear vision of her goal.
She hit liquid – no, thick mist? What the heck? Jade was puzzled and even more so as the pain began to fade. The burning became a throbbing which in a little more than a minute was nothing but itching. Finally she was blinking away as her sight returned.
"Wow!" she whispered. She was not in Kansas anymore.
It was like the demon void, but much nicer. The air was moist rather than bone dry and seemed nearly buoyant, not making up its mind as to whether it was air or liquid. Islands of various sizes floated lazily, covered in peaks and riddled with holes she was certain were being partially obscured by dark vegetation. Twilight shone from the distance, silhouetting everything and casting long shadows.
Jade tightened her grip on her cloak and felt it squelch. Looking down she gasped, dropping it. The cloak floated lazily in the atmosphere, coated in shimmering black, as were her hands.
She could feel it now, on and through her clothes, flowing over her as the mist was drawn to her. She hadn't noticed before, it felt great.
"This stuff healed me?" she wondered, running a hand over her inky face. Frowning, she scrapped her fingernails over the back of her hand. With relief, she saw it move away like oil to reveal her blue skin before the coating resumed.
She took another deep breath, smiling as she looked out on this strange world.
"The shadow realm, for this world at any rate," she concluded. Jade felt awesome; why not enjoy it? Yes, those islands could do with some exploring, or the source of the twilight…
"What am I doing?" Jade demanded, drawing herself up. She was in the middle of something – payback. And she couldn't waste time here; she had to work on how to get back home.
This place was pulling on her. A shadow realm, calling to her new nature like the woods to a wolf.
"Screw that!" she spat. Concentrating, she disappeared back into the black ether, departing from the shadow realm. Her coating of shadow remained standing in her place, slowly drifting apart. It retained enough shape to be admired as an interested party arrived.
"Well, I knew this was coming, but what an unexpected road. But too soon; yes, when you lack the reach to pluck the fruit you must wait, so it will fall into your hand," he grinned, perking a white mustache in the process.
Jump City:
Jade had worked herself into a right fit of anger when she stepped back into the food court through a shadow. That had been both pleasant and disturbing! And the one thing she knew for certain was that it was entirely Beast Boy's fault!
She saw the HIVE trio was cornered by the Titans; how long had she been gone? They probably figured she had retreated back to the HIVE, like she was some stupid little girl to run home crying from a scraped knee.
Well, they wouldn't make that mistake again anytime soon. She powered up for a full on blast from eyes and hands towards the Titans' rear. Mammoth was dumb enough to smile when he saw her, which Robin naturally reacted too.
"Behind!" he shouted. The Titans scattered, leaving her attacks to hit the HIVE trio's less impressive dive for cover.
"Whoops," Jade gulped. Whether it was attacking the good guys again or blasting her so-called allies, that had been a fail.
"Zhu, you idiot!" Jinx shouted, emerging from the smoke looking a bit charred but no worse for wear. People sure were tough in this world.
"Don't blame me for a failure to dodge, besides I still helped!" Zhu shouted back, watching the Titans regroup as the other students emerged cranky, maybe a bit bloodied, but still standing.
She caught sight of Beast Boy and her eyes narrowed.
"YOU!" she snarled, stomping toward him, pointing.
"Me?" he asked, looking odd.
"You hit me, WITH AN ONION YOU JERKFACE!" she yelled, getting up into his face while everyone else started fighting again.
"What? It's perfectly legit to use a bad guy's kryptonite against them!" Beast Boy objected.
"Onions are not my kryptonite!" she shouted back.
"Well, what do you call what happened! ?" Beast Boy demanded.
"It's an allergy… that my whole species has!" she said, honesty slipping through.
"That is a kryptonite thing by definition!" he shouted back.
"No, it's you being a jerk and taking advantage of a weakness I have no control over!" she shouted back, trying to rise into the air enough to glare down at him.
"Well, we are enemies, this is what happens kinda," he pointed out.
"No, you make me too angry to just be an enemy! Congratulations, grasshead! You're my first archenemy! And I'm leaving to take a freakin' shower!" she declared. Without another word, she stomped to a shadow and disappeared. Beast Boy looked after her, seemingly frozen to the spot.
"Archenemy? Cyborg! I have an archenemy!" Beast Boy cheered, before a flying Mammoth landed on him with a thunk.
Later, HIVE:
"So, you and Beast Boy, eh?" Gizmo asked with a grin. Their squad sat on the waiting room bench, waiting for Blood's pleasure, or displeasure as might be the case.
"I'm not sure I like your tone," Zhu narrowed her eyes through the shadow veil.
"Well, he is your archenemy you said…" Gizmo left it hanging, still grinning. Mammoth leaned over into the conversation, smiling – a curse upon smiling villains!
"And everyone knows, as often as not, archenemies over the gender line end up romantic," Mammoth told her, with far too much satisfaction in his voice.
"What! ? That's impossible, I hate him! That's the reason I have him down as an archenemy, that is the definition of archenemy. Some guy you hate even more than the other guys you hate!" Jade protested, jumping up to stand on the bench.
"You know what they say. First comes aggression, then hatred. Then comes wary respect for skills. Followed by surprising common ground on an issue. Then more hatred and aggression. Then a reboot of mutual respect with one side throwing away a win. Then a romantic rendezvous, and one comes back to the city years later, and a literal custody battle ensues over a wide-eyed bastard," Mammoth recounted.
Zhu stared at him, slack jawed and eye twitching.
"Would your love child be bluish green, or greenish blue?" Gizmo asked, smirking.
*KABOOM*
Gizmo landed on the other side of the room, utterly charred with his tech sparking violently. Pulling himself to sit up, he raised a fist toward the ceiling.
"I apologize… for nothing!" he declared. Then fell back in a heap onto the floor. The receptionist looked over her horn-rimmed glasses at him, then at the other students.
"I'll see if he's dead," Mammoth volunteered, getting up. Jinx was now in Zhu's line of sight reading a news magazine. She lowered it to grin at her literally fuming teammate – not just steam either, shadow energy seemed to be radiating as she audibly ground her teeth.
"Relax, that's just a myth," Jinx chided, whapping her lightly over the head with the magazine. She stopped grinding and radiating, but still glared at the other witch. Jinx raised her hands in mock surrender, smiling.
"Seriously, I mean could you see me falling for some jerk that keeps getting in my way?" Jinx pointed out. Zhu made a snorting sound and her posture relaxed.
"An ambitious sociopath like you? You'd probably tie him down and sell him to the highest bidder," Zhu laughed.
"Darn straight," Jinx agreed, her smile growing wider.
"He's okay! Well, not okay, but definitely not dead," Mammoth informed them.
"Who cares?" Zhu asked. Jinx whapped her with the magazine again, only for the paper to rip. Jinx glared at the torn up magazine, then at Zhu as she chewed, looking mischievous.
"Is your race related to goats?" Jinx demanded.
Meanwhile, Titans Tower:
Beast Boy slowly reclined on the couch, arms spread across the top of it, the light reflecting off his cool shades. He gave a dramatic sigh and raised an eyebrow visibly.
"What can I say, some of us have it, and some of us don't. And you can tell, because some of us… have archenemies," he stated. A ladle hit him over the head, ringing a clear note as the impact knocked his shades askew.
"Owowowow!" Beast Boy cried, sitting up clutching his throbbing head. Cyborg stood behind the couch, frowning as he inspected the now bent ladle.
"BB, for the last time, stop with the 'too cool act', it's annoying. And besides, Zhu Chan is not your archenemy!" Cyborg told him.
"Is too!"
"Is not!"
"Is too!"
"Is not!" they shouted back and forth as Beast Boy put his glasses back on. Raven hovered in between the couch and the TV, sinking her nose deeper into her book, as the volume on the two Titans increased.
"Is not! Just because she said you were her archenemy doesn't mean you are," Cyborg insisted.
"Oh really, then what makes an archenemy?" Beast Boy demanded.
"Well... trauma, yeah, you've got to ruin their life somehow. Or thwart them from getting back at someone that ruined their life. Or they ruin your life," Cyborg stated after a pause for thought.
"What? Lex Luthor and Superman are archenemies and that never happened!" Beast Boy pointed out.
"Well, you've got to be opposites, like the Batman and the Joker. Smiles versus frowns, black versus purple, big guy versus skinny freak," Cyborg said bringing up images of the two icons on the big screen.
"Exactly! She's blue; I'm green. I'm fun; she's a stick in the mud that's always angry. I'm funny; she takes everything too seriously. She's magic based; I get my powers from SCIENCE! She's a girl; I'm a boy!" Beast Boy ranted, writing down the differences in columns on a notebook he had whipped out.
"No, no, no! It's not that simple, there is more than coincidence and happenstance to getting an archenemy!" Cyborg objected. Beast Boy glared at him, sparks almost igniting between the two. Then he turned away, crossing his arms.
"I get it! It's okay for Robin to have an archenemy because he's in charge. But now you worry I'm climbing the ladder to better things, while you still aren't worthy of an archenemy!" Beast Boy huffed.
"...What are we even arguing about! ? BB, where did you get the idea having someone fixated on destroying you is a good thing?" Cyborg demanded, making to pull at nonexistent hair.
"Are you kidding? Ours will be an epic feud to resonate through the ages! Hourly news segments, epic poems, lunch boxes, documentaries with guys with funny accents, and lousy direct to DVD movies with us on the cover!" Beast Boy exclaimed.
Cyborg slapped a hand to his face as he watched Beast Boy hold the victory pose on top the couch, flashing the V sign to the world. A thick book hit him square in the face. Glasses shattering, he fell out of sight.
Raven waked into sight, darkness pouring off her. She pointed to the stunned Cyborg.
"You stop adding fuel to the fire," she said.
"Yes ma'am," Cyborg answered, standing at attention. She jumped onto the couch and he just knew when she leaned over the back she was glaring at BB.
"As for you, I won't ask you to get fully in touch with reality. But return to your usual state of delusion immediately, I have built up enough of an immunity to that," Raven said evenly.
"Or what?" Beast Boy retorted, standing back up, showing off cracked sunglasses.
"Remember the bubbles?" she asked. Beast Boy paled and his glasses slipped down his nose to reveal wide eyes.
"You wouldn't," he stuttered.
"For the sake of my sanity, I would," Raven told him.
"She would," Cyborg chimed in. Beast Boy pulled off his shades and handed them to Raven. Numbly, he walked around and sat down on the couch, and fished out a game controller.
"Want to play Accelracers 4?" he asked Cyborg. A huge sigh of relief filled the room. The boys looked to Raven, who looked as calm and collected as normal.
"Give it up, Rae. We know that was you," Cyborg said as he took his place on the couch. Raven rolled her eyes; picking her book up off the floor, she swept out into the hallway.
The door closed behind her as the lads started up their video game. Alone in the hall, she casually glanced about, and put on the cracked shades. Seeing her reflection in the mirror she smiled before taking them off and continuing on her way.
Two Nights Later, Jump City Badlands:
"Alright, I admit I'm a bit confused on this one," Jade admitted. Jinx facepalmed, which earned some snickers from the boys. They were crouching behind a group of boulders near the maximum-security prison located in the badlands outside of Jump. Gizmo had just gotten back from his bomb preps that would kick off the festivities.
"I keep telling you, Blue. Pay. Attention. At. Briefings," Jinx ground out. Jade shrugged dramatically.
"Hey now, I get that we're supposed to cause a big deal as a cover for one of us to spring Machete. What I don't get is why Gadjo isn't here. I mean, Machete is his partner, and storming a prison full of heavily armed guards and the Titans sure to show up… it's kind of his thing," Jade said.
"Fortunately for us, that psycho got thrown in the Pit for a week after trying to feed Captain Hollywood to Mr. Thingy. Which means we get to shine. Which we will, because this operation will be a success," Jinx threatened, glaring at them all. Gizmo and Mammoth nodded, grinning. Jade just pulled her hood up, closing her eyes, turning her face into a black void to anyone watching.
"And he's still there? I would have thought he would have busted his way out by now," Zhu Chan commented.
"They upgraded it recently," Gizmo told her.
"Enough to keep him in it?" Zhu demanded, a bit distressed.
"I hear he's just having a good enough time he hasn't decided to leave yet," Mammoth put in. Jinx cleared her throat, and having gained their attention, gave one of her best "Shut up and listen to me" glares.
"Alright Blue, Blood said you're to take point here. While we cause the distraction, you are going to infiltrate the base and free Machete," Jinx explained.
"Why me?" Jade frowned.
"You have a thief's stealth to get far in undetected, increasing the chances of success. You also have enough firepower to force your way through and out if stealth fails.
"And finally Blue, I don't think you can afford to mess this up. Blood doesn't single people out to prove themselves for no reason," Jinx told her, getting serious. Jade did not gulp; all she allowed herself was a sigh she hoped sounded more irritated than intimidated. Opening her eyes, she saw Gizmo grinning at her – yeah, no doubt about his alignment.
"Well, I guess it's show time. Gizmo?" Jinx asked, stretching as she stood up straight, catching the remote detonator tossed to her. Grinning, the witch pushed the red button with her thumb, and the night lit up as explosions echoed across the badlands.
Shortly:
Jade was unimpressed. With the plan, and with this prison.
She had only received the vague directions of Blood pointing to the Max Sec wing Machete was held in back in the briefing. No floor plans, no Intel. Oh yeah, testing her, bastard.
Well, as for the prison, a little strategic shadow teleporting got her past the checkpoints and normal sneaking was good enough for the rest. You would think a prison that held supervillains of any kind would be more prepared. Granted, she was certainly good enough to pull it off, but she was kind of hoping she would be legitimately thwarted.
But while the guards were arming to the teeth, several even having pretty badass looking body armor, they seemed to be rushing to the battle rather than sealing down the prisoners. The guards not rushing to the prison's defense were her trail to Max Sec.
Entering the menacing cellblock housing the long-term supervillain residents, Jade watched from the shadows, pondering her next move. These cells had doors rather than the usual bars. And shimmering shields were covering them at the moment.
Jade was willing to bet that, unlike the doors, those shields were hooked to some panic button that she couldn't turn off with some guard's key. With limited time and the place packed with guards, she would have to take the force option, she decided.
She slipped by the guards silently, leaving them glancing in suspicion at where she had been. From shadow to shadow, looking at the plaques listing the real name and alias of the inmate.
The problem was, she wasn't very keen on succeeding. Machete, from what she heard, wasn't as crazy as Gadjo – crazy, but not that crazy. But she was just as brutal when she got going. If Jade let her out, it would be a bad thing.
'I could surrender; right now the Titans and the guards are between the HIVE and me. Defect to the Titans now?'
Or get thrown into a cell right here? She was listed as a criminal, and she had seen how people here reacted to her even before getting that label.
The Titans, would they accept her excuses, or even believe them?
'Too risky,' she decided.
She would need some collateral to prove her turning her coat was not just some villain stunt. Dirt on the HIVE. Why hadn't she gone with that sooner? !
Grr, stupid!
Well, no matter now, she decided. What mattered now was that she couldn't go back both unscathed and empty-handed.
Stepping out of the shadows in front of Machete's cell, she grabbed the four nearest guards with her Rooster power and slammed them against the wall. They dropped their guns in hurt and surprise. As the others turned their weapons on her she held them tight and close around her.
Her message was clear. She didn't like it, but taking a hostage with no intent to harm them was the least violent way through this. She rapped her knuckles against the shimmering shield loudly.
"Machete? Step away from the door!" Zhu yelled.
"Kid, do you really want to let that psycho out of her cage?" a guard she couldn't see demanded. She was grateful the hostages hid her flinch; that was too close for comfort.
"No, but orders are orders," she answered honestly. She pressed that same hand against the tingling forcefield, and fired. It went out with a sort of popping boom, and there was enough blast left to dent the door. Turning to fully face the doorway, her heat vision lit up as she tightened the joints, then the lock.
"Okay just a push and-HEY!" Zhu yelled as the door fell outward. She pushed the guards about, scattering them on the way as she dove out from under the thick, falling, steel door. It hit the floor with a muffled ring.
Zhu blew an errant spike of hair out of her face as she pulled herself up from her undignified lunge pose. She looked and saw Machete standing in the doorway, leg still raised from the kick that had nearly squished her liberator.
Jade had not bothered to get a good look at her before. Under the prison uniform she was covered in some camo cloth, only a small hole in the back of her head letting gold-blonde hair stick out on a short ponytail.
Stepping out and onto the door, she grabbed the uniform and tore it off. In an impressive feat, it all fell away in that motion leaving her bare in her body stocking again.
"Jerk!" Jade yelled at her. Then the guards started firing and Jade leapt under the railing.
She landed easily on the lower level; above, she heard the guards' shouts turn to screams. High pitched shrieking over it all, Machete being a mute was an exaggeration apparently. Then three guards came falling toward her, and stopped just short of the floor. They looked up from the floor they almost kissed at a bad speed, to see the blue witch girl's hand raised.
She closed the hand in a fist and they dropped the rest of the way.
"Play possum," she ordered. They complied, slumping into seeming unconsciousness.
Machete came down with a thud, one hand on the floor, the other clutching a nightstick.
"Well, someone's in a mood," Zhu commented. Machete growled under her breath, standing up and cocking her head at the guards on the floor.
"Well come on, let's get out of here before more guards and the Titans show up," Zhu said, turning away. She stopped as the villain held up one finger in a waiting motion, and stalked over to one of the guards.
"I said, we are going," Jade pressed. She was ignored as the teenager raised the weapon to strike – then was jerked off her feet into the air. A seam appeared in the cloth, letting her yellow teeth show as she snarled at the little witch holding her in the air.
'That's just creepy,' Jade thought, again glad for the shadows hiding her face. It was pure reflex that made her jerk to the left as the nightstick whirled through the air her head had just been in.
She watched the stick break as it hit the far wall, and turned her glare back to the one she had just set free. Machete somehow broke free from the grip of telekinesis and landed lightly on the ground, only to get an explosion between her feet.
Zhu watched her get hurled back up to the starting point, eyes and hands aglow.
"Blood never said how intact you had to be," Zhu said, rising to the level. She made to scan for the camo-clad teen, but stopped upon seeing the guards. Apparently Machete had almost liked the ones she threw over the railing.
"Bad day… and someone's behind me, aren't they?" Jade muttered. Luckily the cloak was break away, so Machete ended up with nothing but cloth as Jade shot away. She rolled from the fiery counterattack, leaving the cloak to take the blast.
Jade floated, her robe shifting in the force of the levitation. A pistol flew through the air, and was swatted aside by heat vision. Next was a frontal charge that had Jade grinning as she raised a glowing palm. But the explosion was for little, as the villain stopped anticipating Jade's anticipation, coming over it in a flip.
Jade's forearm took the nightstick blow rather than her face. Then her other arm, as Machete pressed her attack in silence.
"Ahhh!" Jade cried as the third hit to her left arm sent a burst of pain through her, and she heard a crack.
It gave enough of an opening for Machete to strike down on top of her head. Jade fell back, stunned but conscious.
She saw rather than felt herself being lifted, and her vision was blurry enough. Machete held her at arm's length, her mask parting to show off those teeth again. A pistol was held ready to strike with the butt of the gun.
Apparently she forgot the heat ray eye blasts; Jade didn't. The blow took her square in the chest, sending her flying back along the cell doors to hit the wall with a thud.
Her feet didn't touch the ground when the pressure let up from the two smoking circles on her chest. Zhu crouched, breathing hard, red eyes glowing bright, hand outstretched. She rotated her hand, flipping the struggling villain upside down, raised her about a meter further into the air, and slammed her head first into the concrete floor. Two more poundings and she stopped struggling. Zhu did one more, both to be safe and on behalf of those guards.
"I really should leave you here. But after all this trouble, I don't want Blood to be my problem too," Jade remarked, getting to her feet.
"Young one! Please stop this," a familiar and distressed voice intruded.
"Oh bad day and a half!" Zhu facepalmed as Starfire swooped in. She glared at the alien as if her glare could banish her to the furthest reaches of the galaxy. Especially when she gasped at the mess Machete had made; another mess she would get blamed for.
"You let the Machete out?" Starfire demanded.
"Well, thanks for not blaming me off the bat," Zhu complimented, picking up her charred but seemingly salvageable cloak. Fireproof had been a must in the materials, after all.
"You are not a savage like the Machete who brings only bad and terrible things like a biverted xykondost," Starfire answered.
"I have no idea what that is, but-"
"You are merely young and impressionable. Being led astray by the evil HIVE in need of rescue because you are like an adorable mdheiovu cub strayed from the flock. Do not worry, your confusion of good and bad will be set right with much of the therapy and-"
*Boom*
Starfire went flying from the explosive blast taking her with her guard down.
"Oh great. I really have to get a handle on this temper. But I am not some cute whatever, AND I DO NOT NEED THERAPY!" Jade shouted, shaking a fist. She had forgotten that arm was broken, making her yelp with pain at the act. Thus leaving her own guard down to a barrage of starbolts.
It was like getting punched with water balloons fired out of a cannon filled with shy-of-boiling hot water. Shaking it off somewhat, Zhu staggered, looking around for the Titan as the barrage let up.
"I am sorry, but it is for your own good," Starfire said above her. Jade turned when she should have dodged, the heel of the Titan's purple boots crashing down on her head.
The blow connected, and Zhu went down, arms wide, onto her back, her hood fallen. Her eyes slid closed, unconscious Starfire concluded. The Titan gave a sigh of relief, pulling out her communicator.
"Friends, Robin was correct, the Zhu Chan was attempting to free prisoners for the HIVE," Starfire reported. She heard an explosion through the com before Robin answered.
"Raven's on her way; Cyborg's disabled Gizmo and they're falling back," Robin said.
"Glorious, I have the Zhu in cu-'"Starfire said, before a nightstick cracked over the back of her head. The Titan stumbled forward, but did not go down, spinning on a heel and throwing a starbolt blind at her assailant.
Seeing double, she made out Machete lean away from the wide attack, and swing the melee weapon into her face. She raised an arm to block… the wrong image.
Machete cocked her head, looking between the downed Titan and her stirring rescuer. Which one should she start pummeling first, she wondered.
Training kicked in, making her leap into the air as shadow-cloaked pistols and nightsticks hurled through the space she had just occupied. Raven finished stepping out of the cement wall onto the walkway, eyes narrowed in annoyance.
Zhu groaned, cradling her aching head as she sat up. What had hit her? Wait, was she in prison? Oh yeah . . .
She looked around and saw Machete fighting Raven and not doing so well. Raven was hovering and keeping her distance, throwing projectiles at her opponent and raising shields against the camo-girl's attacks.
'She can't take Machete in a straight up fight, so she fights with her other strengths. Clever girl, finally,' Jade smiled.
Unfortunately she had just fought a Titan, and as she watched, Starfire picked herself up and launched into the fray, forcing Machete back from Raven.
Becoming Machete's cellmate was a very bad thing; that would so not be happening to her, Zhu decided. It would be nice to leave her to get caught, except Blood was enough of a jerk to call it a failure even when it wasn't Jade's fault.
What she needed was a distraction for both sides. Jade looked around, her eyes falling on the info pad next to the very large door Starfire had been laying by.
"Hmm," she rubbed her chin, standing up. Pulling her hood back into place, Zhu grinned.
Machete was getting angry. Bad enough she didn't have any edged weapons, but these girls were too rude, not letting her pummel them into paste. Such rudeness was insufferable, so she would have to be very stern. And how much harder did she have to hit these shields? She was getting tired of trying to get past them. She had been locked up too long to be denied the satisfaction of hitting people in such a way.
She was about to bare her teeth at the Titans when their little dance was interrupted by a large angry hunk of stone.
Cinderblock plowed into Raven, roaring. A large shield rose up to greet him as Raven saw the new threat at the last second. But his attack carried shield and all to plow into a wall. Machete frowned, trying to see through the debris kicked up by the impact, but was suddenly jerked up into the air again.
*Konk*
She slumped in the air as Jade twirled the nightstick and tossed it aside. Reaching into a pouch on her belt, she pulled out a small vial of potion.
"Congratulations – for being such a jerk, you are my first sort-of-human test subject. My trademarked sleeping potion, enjoy the sleep, Rip van Winkle," Zhu smiled, tilting the girl's head back and opening her mouth slightly to put the potion down her throat. There actually was a seam, she saw; it was just hard to see.
Starfire hesitated, meeting Zhu's red eyes, but flew into the dust cloud to aid her friend.
Raven blasting Cinderblock back from pounding on her shield was as good a cue to leave as any. Sending the sleeping psycho through first, Jade glanced at Starfire knocking Cinderblock up to the next level with a kick. Then she followed Machete into the shadows.
HIVE:
The door slid open, letting Jade float into her quarters. When it closed behind her she dropped to the floor, legs almost buckling. Pulling her cloak off, she tossed it aside onto the floor. Her robe joined it next as she crossed the room.
She had met up with the others as planned. They hadn't minded Machete's sleeping routine, and soon enough it was back to the HIVE. So Mammoth dropped the blood-crazy girl on the reception desk after their mission was confirmed complete, and she had gone off.
Jade held her head in her hands as she made her way to her bed. It had not been a good day, or a good time at all ever since she had fallen through that portal. And she just might have made a new enemy while missing an opportunity to defect again.
As irritating as the Titans could be, she needed to remember they were her best ticket out of the HIVE.
'So get cracking on some leverage to avoid prison,' she admonished herself. But it was halfhearted. She had a headache and was still nauseous from the fight. The only silver lining was that her potion might keep Machete laid up for a good while.
Still wearing her clothes, she fell back on the bed. She let sleep overtake her with relief. Her dreams were undisturbed by the anxiety filling her days, the anger fueled by that same ever-present wariness. Her dreams were full of twilight and dark ponderous shadows moving across the serene void.
She slept in peace, the song from beyond reaching out to her blood, sent by the will of another. It would take time, but he was patient; no fortress built in hasty passion stood beside that built with skilled patience.
Yes, all in good time; let her rest now, and forget in waking. She would remember beneath the surface, as the daylight and moonlight threw themselves against her, and drove her forward with savage karma. When she came to the safe harbor at last seeking solace, she would do so as if of her own heading.
"I will make the bird want to sing," the King whispered, smiling.
AN: Can you guess what FWA stands for? I hope you enjoyed the seminar section. Its a bit of a call back to my original satire stories. This was mostly meant as a fun chapter to explore Jade's situation and have fun with it while moving the plot along. And of course it gives a bit of CD time. Gadjo ended up with a bigger part than I intended, but he is the type to invite himself into a party, hope you didn't mind too much.
Well next up is Hachin. I am also working on a new project on my behalf of my brother, and some original fiction. Fortunately, I love to write.
Long days and pleasant nights to you all.