One step after another, more and more, slowly and steady...she breaks down and moans in pain.
Then, tears well up in her eyes, her vision blurs. The cry and sobs echo through the forest but no one listens to her wailing. "Help...it hurts so much..." How much time passes? Half an hour, an hour, longer? She can't read the sun. Natsumi collects up every bit of her power left, stands up, and wipes over her black hands but useless. The misfortune blood won't come off. But it looks like ink to her.
Natsumi tumbles further, not easing her crying. It helps the pain to shed tears loudly, the tension and knot of her energy release only so much as to not let her demon part die. If she only holds on long enough, the demon will be so small and weak that recovery to its former state will be indolent. Every step is a risk to stumble, and at some point, even her whining won't do better. She clenches the seller's scale in her hands and relieves the memory from seven days prior. Seven days already out in the nothing, in this shit here!
"Stupid, retarded human. Stupid stupid human. Hadn't it been for your faulty minds, I wouldn't have to suffer this...suffer the downfall of my core...Sugemi..." The grip around the scale tightens and throws it in reflex away at the sudden pain.
"What?!" Blood drips from her finger. She pressed the tip of the scale, it's sharp enough to stab. Natsumi searches and finds the tiny thing again and holds it securely in her hands.
"Sugemi, father deemed you a smart woman, yet you are the dumbest I've ever come across ever. How can you believe a noble is generous enough to lose their reputation for a piece of a shitty peasant like you?"
Further steps, until between trees and bushes, where the wind whispers curses to her, she finds a little lake. Carefully, she approaches it and kneels before it. "And you have the audacity to be mad. You left back that madness and now there is me. I'm a fucking monster because of you." The reflection shows all the bruises and the hurt in her face. With the scale next to her, Natsumi splashes water to clean herself, but it doesn't work as good. A trail of dark liquid colors the lake. "Love love love love love love! Human, what do you get such a kick from, when in love? What is it that you risk your entire fucking existence for love that can be for everyone? You can love anyone, anything, you can love multiple people and you chose this shit, Sugemi, you chose this. Now I have to bathe out your actions for the rest of my life. My powers almost killed the medicine seller. And now, I still live because I'm a Mononoke in flesh and blood, a material thing, far from just spirituality. My body protected my soul. My body is the core, that that holds the demon. He should have, no he needed to destroy me too. Spill my blood all over the ground. He didn't."
Natsumi drops to the side, closes her eyes, and allows tears to free themselves silently.
"He didn't. Didn't he know? Possible. This self-talk isn't going to help me at all. Why am I even doing this?"
"Who's there?" Natsumi shivers and waits for someone to come. The sound of steps, Natsumi looks up, she holds the scale close to her chest, as though it can protect her. It can't, it won't even jiggle its bells.
"Oh, dear gods!" Someone bends down to her, a woman. Delicate and petite, she softly pulls Natsumi onto her back. "My child, what happened to you? Please say something!"
"What should I possibly say? You see, I'm a piece of crap laying on the ground. Just leave me to my last breath, it isn't special or anything." At this point, Natsumi doesn't care to uphold her toddler cover. "How...so eloquent for a toddler..."
"Happens sometimes you know, that there is a smart kid." For a good while, the woman just stares at her, until she unwraps her Obi and lays it around Natsumi, gently lifts her. "What are you doing human, I'm not an infant. You can't just do anything with me."
"My little child, I don't understand how you can speak with so much maturity but I will not leave you to your last breath, as you say."
"And what do you intend to do with me?"
She smiles and strokes Natsumi's dirty hair. "I'm a foster care mother. We have lots of children. I'll take you there, we have a healer who will help you. What happened to you, that you are in such a condition? And who did this?" Fascinating, how she speaks with Natsumi. She doesn't treat her like a toddler even though she is one, just because of her language.
"It is of no business to you what happened. You want to help me? Then do what you said. I have no power to do anything else really." The woman's smile won't help to hide her fear that glistens in her eyes, the way someone watches a predator who behaves kindly but their next actions could be anything. Only, Natsumi's next actions could be no more than to fall unconscious. "Alright my child, I will take you. You can sleep in my arms if you like, the walk will take some time."
"I stink so take care. I would also recommend for your good that you don't go running around and telling everyone that I talk like this. It's for the better." She nods and takes Natsumi up like a baby.
"Let's go then."
"Want food? Look, look-" She shoves apples she probably picked up from the nearby tree to Natsumi, who doesn't move an inch. "Human child, can you not understand I'm in no condition to move. Besides, I don't feel like eating, rather like destroying myself." Natsumi's will to live and her entire motivation for all things, they dropped. Too tired to take care of the language to a child. The woman brought her to a huge house full of children in all spans of life, from the youngest being an infant to the oldest over twenty. Wherever she takes all of these children and what her reasons are; Natsumi can't complain. They used healing things she doesn't know on her wounds and bandaged her. For an hour this girl tries to gain her attention, to start a conversation but that's far from her desire.
"Why, you always call me a human child? I'm human, pretty clearly."
"Because I don't want to be put into the same place as you filthy creatures. It is your fault that I turned the way I am right now. I could've been like you but I have too much intelligence and too little-"
Natsumi stops in tracks, as the girl, surely around six or more years, closes her arms around Natsumi, who breathlessly watches her. Not that she can do anything. Upon arriving, her soul had already crumbled to pieces, leaving her with no power. It will take a long time to recover, possibly years.
"You seem so sad when talking. Why? Let's be friends and I can protect you and take care of you. I will give my best to do that, yes!" She grips the scale tighter.
The image of the medicine seller comes to her mind. And the way she behaved around him, like the toddler child she is supposed to be. Natsumi tries her hardest to give a kid-friendly answer. Just a little empathy. The warmth of the stranger's hug calls for her tears. "Really? You can, you can, sure. But, I'm big enough, I can take care of myself and you too."
"Now you are so different..." the girl beams, one lost teeth in the front, which makes her look funny but Natsumi stays quiet. "Everybody needs friends! Here, with mother Kira, we can all be friends together, and have lots of fun."
Natsumi smiles, genuinely. The broken parts of her insides fill with warmth like the hug. "I guess...oooh, I'm excited about that." She forces a smile.
"Welcome, Natsumi!"
Her revenge is filled, she did what the demon wanted. Maybe now she can behave like a normal child, or at least be treated as such when she gives effort.
The cold metal between her fingers calls for her attention, as the bells of the scale ring. They ring...
May this hopefully be better than life before.
Okay hi, this wasn't planned but I thought putting up these parts rounds the story better kinda? I guess haha. But this is really the end now. This is one of the best storie I ever did? Even if the grammar is a bit questionable XD But anyway, thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it.If or if not, you can always give me your opinion. Any questions you have, or whatever haha.
What did you like, what not? Or how are the characters and stuff, anything you want really.
So yeah, see you another time, bye! :D