Jeliorn || Shadowhunters || Jeliorn || A Bond Not Dissolved || Jeliorn || Shadowhunters || Jeliorn
Title: A Bond Not Dissolved – Writer's Month 2020
Fandom: Shadowhunters: The Mortal Instruments
Disclaimer: All rights to the Shadowhunters show reserved to Ed Decter, the books the show is based off and its characters belong to Cassandra Clare. This fanfiction on the other hand is entirely mine. No money is made with this, though reviews are more than welcomed.
Tags: m/m, alpha/beta/omega dynamics, courting, post series, hurt/comfort, fluff
Main Pairing: Meliorn/Jace
Shadowhunters Characters: Jonathan 'Jace' Herondale, Meliorn, Alexander 'Alec' Lightwood
Writer's Month Prompt: joy
Summary: Meliorn offers Jace care in the Seelie Realm to deal with the aftermath of the war. Partially, because the bond formed between them to go to Edom had left a residue that had them both longing for each other.
A Bond Not Dissolved
Writer's Month 2020
A bond, once forged, could never be dissolved. It could be severed, broken, yes, but there would always be that sore end, that loose untethered part. Like an open wound.
Not all of them felt it, but Meliorn was more in-tune with himself and these feelings. After they left Edom and the bonds were cut, Meliorn very much felt that sore wound where he had been tied to Jace. He doubted it felt the same way for Jace, especially with everything Jace was going through in that moment. The blonde had enough to deal with as it stood. For Meliorn – at least emotionally – this was his main focus. Yes, he was quite busy, what with the Seelie Queen's death, but emotionally all he could think about was Jace and the way Jace had felt bound to him.
He hadn't expected to enjoy spending time with the blonde – so far all he had been was Isabelle's brother and nothing more. But the blonde was snarky and cute, easy to fluster. He was even cute when he was frustrated, with that little pout. And his answers to Meliorn's teasing questions were rather entertaining. It was enough to make him... fond of Jace. It were multiple things playing together, Jace's overall self that was surprisingly appealing, the bond that had already been between them, then there was the fact that Jace was an omega and Meliorn was an alpha. For alpha and omega to share a bond between each other already, it left Meliorn aching.
So when the bond was cut, Meliorn felt the longing grow. So despite the Seelie Court being in disarray and Meliorn being an important member of the court, who should have a single-minded focus on reshaping it, he was drawn to the Institute for the first Downworlder Cabinet meeting after the war, even though the majority of the court thought that should not be his concern so far. He managed to sway them, told them that it was vital for them, particularly in their own current state of unrest, to keep tabs on how everyone else was doing.
/break\
Jace had been through a lot. Too much, some would say. Those some included Alec. His parabatai was worried. Rightfully so. Over the past few months, Jace had tried to kill himself three times and he had been killed once. And he had killed... so many times while he had been possessed.
There was always something to do during the war – he was struggling with his mental health when the Owl took full possession over him, then he had been preoccupied with looking for Clary whom he refused to believe to be dead, then they had to track down Jonathan again and free Clary from Lilith's hold, then Idris nearly was destroyed and they had to go to Edom to fix that.
The problem was that... there was nothing to do anymore. Everyone was working hard to rebuild what had been broken, but after that? Regular missions. No more purpose. Just... floating.
"Jace. I'm worried about you", sighed Alec with that heartbroken look on his face.
"Don't you have the first new Downworlder Cabinet meeting to attend?", sighed Jace.
"I still have some minutes to spare. And you're... You're my parabatai and you're hurting and I will always put you first", stated Alec seriously as he approached Jace. "What do you need, Jace."
Jace opened his mouth and closed it again after a moment. That was the problem. He didn't know. He was just so – he was tired and purposeless and the nightmares... Not just at night. The strangest things sent him into flashbacks during the day too, like waking nightmares he was trapped in and couldn't get out. And they only left him even more drained. Sometimes he'd just space out and remember all the awful things that had happened in the past year. Occasionally, the torture on the Morning Star, other times the torture inside his mind, then remember how the Owl had used his body to kill people. On some days, it went back all the way to his childhood.
"I don't know, Alec", admitted Jace after a moment, closing his eyes tightly. "I don't know. I just... I just know that I'm hurting. And wherever I look, something reminds me of... and I just... I just want to sleep, but I can't, because that's where the bad nightmares lay. I'm so tired..."
Alec's heart ached as he looked at his parabatai and heard the way his voice broke. He knew. He could feel it through their bond, could feel how much Jace was suffering. He wanted to help, but he didn't know how. The City of Bones was an idea, but even Alec didn't know how good of an idea it was, considering the Clave had been fine with locking Jace away and torturing him and they had also been happy to sentence Clary to death too. Alec didn't trust them, couldn't trust them. What if they found something and deemed Jace 'too dangerous' as an aftermath from the possession? Alec wished there was a way to help Jace without leaving him at the Clave's mercy.
"I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but I have been looking for you."
The parabatai turned around to find Meliorn standing in Jace's doorway. Alec took a deep breath and schooled his features into that professional head of the Institute expression of his.
"I'll be there in a minute, I assure you the meeting will start on time."
"I'm sorry, I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to Jace."
Alec and Jace exchanged a confused look, before Jace shrugged. "What... did you want?"
For a moment, Meliorn regarded Alec critically, but then seemingly deemed Jace's parabatai as okay to stay around. "I want to take you with me to the Seelie Court after this meeting."
"I... what?", grunted Jace surprised, staring at the alpha.
"I know about your troubles. I... felt a certain extent of them while we were... linked", offered Meliorn. "I want to help you. We have far more advanced and effective healers than you Shadowhunters, particularly when it comes to mental health."
That wasn't hard; Shadowhunters in general were still in deep denial about mental health. Many issues like depression and PTSD were ignored as long as possible, because they could put them out of commission. No one wanted to admit weakness. Not when it could get one discharged. It was what had kept Jace from going to the City of Bones in the first place. The fear of no more active duty. Not that they could have helped much, if they could.
The Seelies had incredible healers and they had a connection between mind and body that they cared for, in a way Shadowhunters didn't. They would be far better equipped to helping Jace with his multitude of issues. And, more importantly, it'd be a different environment. A huge problem here were all the things that triggered him and in the City of Bones even more so.
"Not that I doubt your... intentions. But what are your intentions?", asked Alec, arms crossed. "Why would you offer this? For Isabelle, I wouldn't even question you. But..."
"I understand your doubt. And your... protectiveness", chuckled Meliorn good-natured. "The unmated alpha may have unsavory intentions with your unmated omega parabatai."
Alec narrowed his eyes, raising his upper lip just so – not an outright snarl but a warning that Meliorn shouldn't push too much. Jace simply heaved a sigh and leaned back against the wall. He hadn't slept enough to endure all this nonsense. He appreciated Alec's protectiveness, most of the time. He also knew he had never quite made the best decisions in the love-department. Not that he was planning on making a move on Meliorn; Meliorn was Izzy's ex. Besides, Jace had never been with an alpha before – deliberately so. He'd always been put down for being an omega, seen as weaker. So he had never taken an alpha to bed, because then people would whisper how he was just an omega, who'd get controlled by someone else's knot. Jace was never going to be that way.
"I assure you, I have no sinister intentions", declared Meliorn, holding Alec's gaze. "I want to help."
"Not good enough", grunted Alec and shook his head. "The Seelie Realm isn't safe. The last time my parabatai went there, he nearly died. I need more than that, Meliorn."
"We had a bond", replied Meliorn after a moment, turning to look at Jace. "When we went to Edom, we shared a bond and... I felt that bond and I felt your pain, even if it was only for a short time."
"That... That's not how that was supposed to work", whispered Alec with furrowed brows.
"It wasn't, but it was also not supposed to work at all", offered Meliorn, tilting his head. "But the redhead broke the laws of magic. We are all fundamentally different, so... it figures that messing with magic like this will have different effects. I may not have felt his pain to the same extend as you do with your parabatai-bond, but I felt it and I want to help. Will you accept that?"
Meliorn turned back to look at Alec, locking eyes with him. They held that stare until it got kind of uncomfortable for Jace. Seriously. He rolled his eyes and elbowed Alec pointedly.
"My mental health issues, my choice", grunted Jace dryly.
"I know", grunted Alec, looking at Jace with that worried, heart-broken look. "I just-"
"Worry about me, yes, I am quite aware", sighed Jace, a small smile on his lips. "But... I need to get out of here, I can't put into words just how much I need to get out of this Institute that's been invaded by fa... Valentine, Jonathan, Aldertree... Lilith, when she possessed me. I... I don't feel safe here. Not anymore. And I think... if I want to focus on... my issues... I need to get away from here."
"But the Seelie Realm-", started Alec with that overbearing-parabatai-tone of voice.
"I trust Mel", interrupted Jace, furrowing his brows. "I... think it may be because of the bond, because it... it did feel... Not like the parabatai bond, but... I felt the connection. And I... I want to... I want to give this a try, I think? I really don't know what to do, Alec. I'm out of ideas. I tried pulling myself out of this on my own, but... I don't think I can..."
Alec furrowed his eyebrows as he approached Meliorn, resting a hand on Meliorn's shoulder and squeezing it. "If anything happens to my parabatai while he is in your care..."
"Threat received. I assure you, I will protect your parabatai."
"Gre—eat. Now, the both of you, get out of here", exclaimed Jace bemused. "You two have a Cabinet Meeting to get to. And I... have to pack, I suppose."
/break\
The Seelie Court was beautiful. It took Jace a few weeks to really get used to it, but Meliorn was with him every step of the way. He let Jace stay with him, which should be awkward for Jace considering they were both unmated, but seeing as this was the Seelie Court, it actually made him feel a bit reassured to stay with Meliorn. Because he did trust Meliorn.
"Your hair has grown so much", noted Meliorn as he approached Jace from behind.
"Mh, yes", sighed Jace. "Diantha threatened to braid my hair."
"Don't let her", growled Meliorn sharply, startling Jace a little bit.
"Mh. Now I'm intrigued. Tell me more", prompted Jace and sat up.
He was sprawled out on the huge heap of pillows on the floor in front of the balcony. The view was breathtaking from there, it had quickly become Jace's favorite place. It was like a nest, so it appealed to the omega. Though he wasn't entirely sure if Meliorn really had that before Jace had come to stay with him. It was a nest, why would an alpha keep a nest in his rooms? In the past three weeks, Jace hadn't seen Meliorn use it before either.
"Hair is special for Seelies. You only let your family or mate braid your hair", replied Meliorn.
"O—Oh so Diantha was coming onto me", laughed Jace impishly.
"She's by far not the only one. Many are intrigued by the pretty Shadowhunter."
"Aw. You think I'm pretty. On a scale of one to ten...", drawled Jace teasingly.
"About a nine", replied Meliorn, holding Jace's gaze.
The omega swallowed hard, feeling himself flush. Curious. Shaking his head, he turned back to look out of the window. The Seelie Realm was absolutely breathtaking, it truly was a fairy tale realm. Jace tilted his head to look up at Meliorn when he noticed the Seelie next to him.
"How was your day?", asked Meliorn gently.
"Good. Really good. Some meditating with Chrys. A session with Erina. It... good."
"Then why do you sound sad?", wondered Meliorn.
"I... It's been three weeks. I've never been separated from my parabatai for this long", whispered Jace, pulling his legs up against his chest and resting his chin on his knees. "I miss him. So much."
"It's been three days, for him", offered Meliorn bemused. "Believe me, if it's been three weeks in the mundane world, then your parabatai would have kicked down my door already."
"What? Oh", huffed Jace, the smallest smile on his lips. "...Yeah, he would."
"Here." Meliorn offered Jace a small, dark-green box.
Jace accepted it and opened it, frowning curiously. "Oh, come on. You could at least date an omega before you propose, you know? And I expect at least some kind of jewel on it."
"Duly noted", chuckled Meliorn. "It's a Seelie ring. I sent the other to your parabatai. But I only wanted to give it to you when you ask for your parabatai. I thought... you may need a period to adjust to all of this and focus on yourself first."
For a moment, Jace played with the box and the ring in his hand, before he tilted his head back once more to look at Meliorn. "Would... you braid my hair for me? It's been getting in my way."
The way Meliorn narrowed his eyes for a moment told Jace that the alpha was thinking deeply about the implication. Jace had been listening to what Meliorn had said earlier. But Jace was also listening closely to everything else. As Meliorn continued staring at him, Jace sat up.
"You invited me here. You helped me. I.. this... I have only just started but I feel so much better than I have in months... You let me live here, in your home. Now you're giving me a Seelie ring so I can talk to my parabatai", offered Jace softly. "I... I can't put to words just how much you helped me in these past weeks, Mel. I don't know what to do to show you how much I appreciate you."
"And the logical conclusion is to invite me to court you?", asked Meliorn bemused.
Shrugging, Jace turned toward Meliorn fully. "The logical conclusion is that you are an alpha who... who cares for me more than anyone else aside from my parabatai. An alpha who makes me feel safe, who invited me into his den and has been taking care for me. And who's clearly attracted to me but hasn't made a move on me yet because... Because you know I need to focus on myself right now. I know that. And I'm not... asking for... dates and physical intimacy or anything, I just... I want to let you know that I care for you too, that I want you in my life."
"You feel the pull too?", asked Meliorn after another moment, kneeling down.
"...Yes", whispered Jace softly. "The bond, that's reaching out for you. I feel drawn to you, yes. But I don't think it's just the bond. I admit the bond was what made me agree so quickly to your offer. But... the past few weeks? Being here with you? I... It's more than that."
The answer satisfied Meliorn and he knelt down next to Jace. He gently reached out to run his fingers through Jace's hair before he started braiding it. The motions were so soothing that Jace felt himself dozing off slowly. He really enjoyed being with Meliorn.
/break\
Jace was making breakfast for them, humming to himself. He had been staying in the Seelie Realm for six months – six weeks for Alec, who regularly checked in with Jace. What had been a slow start had actually... helped, so much. He felt so much better. And he was happy, here, with Meliorn, feeling joy for the first time in too many month. Grinning, he gathered the breakfast up and carried it over into their bedroom. A few weeks ago, Jace had started sleeping in Meliorn's bed – only sleeping. They hadn't really done much more than share space and tenderness, but Jace could feel the bond between them flaring up, growing anew but in a different way. A matebond was slowly forming between them, right where the other bond had been severed. Putting the tray down, Jace crawled in next to Meliorn, gently kissing him awake.
"Mh... something smells delicious", whispered Meliorn as he buried his nose in Jace's hair. "And I smell breakfast too. What a nice way to wake up..."
He pulled the omega close and Jace gladly relaxed against him. "You've been out so long with meetings at the court, I figured you deserve to sleep in. And a good breakfast."
Meliorn hummed pleased, running his fingers over Jace's side. With the other hand, he reached out for one of the croissants that Jace had brought. He knew it was a slow process for his omega, to get better. The sessions – various kinds, therapy to meditation – helped him though and Jace was more at ease than Meliorn had ever seen him. He seemed truly happy, at ease. And it... made Meliorn happy to see Jace like that. The more comfortable the Shadowhunter had gotten, the more he had started helping Meliorn around the house, helped make things easier for the Seelie too. There was so much to do at the court, it was still in disarray after the queen's death, and Jace's support and help around the house were really making Meliorn's life easier. So did this. Just this moment, getting to hold his omega close, have his warmth and scent sooth Meliorn like this.
"You know I told my... siblings... about... us", whispered Jace softly.
"You did?", asked Meliorn surprised, turning to look at Jace's face.
Isabelle and Alec had been over last weekend, to visit. Because Jace was feeling well enough in his progress that he wanted to see his family again. Before that, everyone had advised him not to, because he needed to focus on his recovery and not focus on the other people in his life. Still, when they had been over, Jace told them that he was kind of courting with Meliorn. He had been particularly nervous about Isabelle – but she had just laughed, because she was now dating Simon, who was Clary's ex, while Clary was dating Maia, who was both Jace and Simon's ex, so recycling exes was kind of what their group did. Both had been happy for Jace, after seeing just how good he was doing. Not that he was the only one. Alec was now consul, Isabelle and Clary had become parabatai. Everyone was moving on with their lives. And so was Jace. He was happy, with Meliorn.
"They seemed happy enough. Pretty sure Alec's still gonna give you a shovel talk the next time he sees you though", chuckled Jace amused, turning enough to kiss Meliorn's cheek.
"I wouldn't expect anything less", whispered Meliorn with a fond smile.
"I... The bond", started Jace slowly, voice dropping a bit. "You can feel it too, right?"
"Yes. What has been severed has... slowly started reconnecting", confirmed Meliorn, tracing Jace's braids. "It's different from what it used to be before. It's.. stronger. I like feeling you like this."
He pressed a kiss against Jace's temples. His fingers traced along the silver bracelet he had given Jace in courting, up Jace's arm to his neck, where a leather-band was holding a leaf-amulet. The omega smelt so content as he snuggled up to Meliorn, the breakfast kind of forgotten as the two simply reveled in each other's attention and care.
~*~ The End ~*~
Author's note: I've taken a bit to figure out where to fit Jeliorn into Writer's Month, but in the end, this ship has kind of become that thing that works good post-finale to comfort Jace - so joy it is! ;D