A/N: I'm not done with chapter 5 yet! Therefore, there may be a delay tomorrow.
Oh how ironic Tenten felt the situation was. She cracked a hard eye open to find herself in midday. Her head throbbed to no end. The alcohol in her system refused to leave. She had gotten sick to her stomach overnight.
Tenten growled, pushing herself up from her bed. With her head heavy, the world felt laid on its side. She pressed her feet onto the ground and the world shook. It rumbled every cell in her body. Had it been too long since her reunion with alcohol?
Recalling yesterday night made her core ready to engulf itself. Because of their bitter kiss, Tenten found herself drowning in saké. It was not that she couldn't bear running back to him, feeling unsure of her own words that she said to him. No, it was not a woeful incident requiring saké. It was because Sakura's keen emerald eyes saw their indecent kiss.
"Congratulations," she said, "but why is Neji-san leaving? Is he coming back?"
No, Tenten uttered the word a tad too late, too many alcohol bottles too late.
Balancing on her own two legs, Tenten wobbled to her bathroom door. The ground rumbled again. She feared the foundations of her building would fall. Still hungover from yesterday, she shook the concern away. Tenten opened the door in preparation for the last few hours of the day.
It was dinner that Tenten prepared. The echoes of pots and pans clinking made her wake from yesterday night's drunk behavior. The sun still sat high in the sky but it had past noon. Dinner would soon be consumed. Again, the vibrations of the ground electrified her home. It was then that it piqued her interest. Tenten parted the curtains and looked out the window. She squinted with the sunrays and found the perpetrators of this noise. It resided beyond the horizon outside of the village gates. A dirt cloud had amassed higher than the village walls. Tenten dashed to her bedroom and opened her balcony doors. Her eyes veered to the Hokage compound down to the passersby below. They moved along without hindrances. She looked to the dirt clouds beyond her reach. With a troubled inhale, she retreated back to her apartment. She moved along without hindrances.
"I don't want to kill you," Lee huffed out, attempting to catch his breath. Staring back at him was his comrade, that friend. "I won't fight you like this."
"Like what?" the other man heaved. He stared with hard cold eyes. "You think I'm delusional."
"No."
Lee watched as that friend smirked. The man's eyes narrowed and he spoke, "This fight had been long overdue, Lee. You'll never get another chance to destroy me like you always wanted."
"I've never wanted to destroy you-"
That friend lunged at Lee with impeccable speed. Lee evaded in a blur and perched himself upon a tree branch, "Neji-"
A wave of air aimed for Lee's head, "Are we not rivals? Have I become too weak to not even be considered your rival?"
Dawn approached when that friend first pulled Lee to the training grounds. It stemmed from regret as he relayed. The young man hadn't spent enough time with Lee. And if he were to die in the war, it would be a death filled with too much hatred for himself. It was a reason why he sought Lee on the training field.
But as their aspirations have changed, so too did the reason for inviting Lee change. Their friendly spar took a turn when that friend recalled his unfateful evening the day prior. Those anger thought to have dissipated with the night reemerged in great intensity. He instigated their rivalry fight without warning.
Moving the mountains, crossing plains by the second, dust followed after them. The outskirts of Konoha began to be rearranged with every swing and every counter.
Lee's fists and kicks grew with ominous green heat. His friend no longer communicated with him. Those white eyes grew harsh on him. That friend's attacks no longer yielded his own life. It no longer yielded Lee's either. Lee concentrated on that friend's constant barrage. The man who moved with grace in every fighting stance ran toward him jaggedly.
Just one whirl of Lee's kick pummeled a line of trees gone from its roots for miles on end. Still, that friend moved a speed Lee hadn't witnessed before. It was as if that man was desperate for something Lee couldn't decipher.
That friend blew a gaping hole through the mountain beside them. Lee grappled him. If the only way to make this friend give up was to break his bones, Lee would snap them with no hesitation. Deep inside, Lee knew there was something eating his friend away.
That friend's physical chakra blew himself from Lee's grasp. His sixth gate lost its intensity. It wavered for a split second and Lee hit the hard ground. The earth cracked enormously.
"Get up," that friend demanded. "You did not hit me hard enough."
A single bloody trail escaped from the corner of that friend's mouth a while ago. A single bloody trail did not reveal many details about the traumas Lee had done to his friend's internal body.
Lee could not see it, but Neji knew the extent of his injuries piled far more than his friend, "You look afraid."
Lee stared at his friend who looked back with lifeless eyes. He got to his knees and pushed himself up to his feet. A bruised knot sat at the end of his brow. It obscured a part of his vision. Lee chuckled, "I am. For me, who thinks you might just kill me so that you'd stop. And for you, because this isn't the friend who is my rival." Lee held his side and gasped for air. His gates began to close one by one. "I wondered why you wanted to train with me this morning. It crossed my mind why you didn't scout Tenten," he smiled, "Gai-sensei said that there are many hurdles to jump over through life. Neji, this is one of them. You may take your anger and frustration out on me but not for this reason. I want you to fight me because it is me that is on your mind. Right now, you are not my rival."
The veins that grew beside each cheek retracted. Lee stood too far from that friend to see his slightest expression. As each breath was exhaled by Konoha's Green Beast, the muteness between them elongated. A dusty hush from the wind weaved through them. The tendrils that had glued themselves to Lee's face began to detach themselves one by one. With not another word conveyed, that friend turned his back to him and walked sourly from the carnage of their battle. Lee watched those shoulders hang low. Still, that friend carried himself with dignity. That friend knew he had lost.
Lee yelled out to him, "Gai-sensei misses you! Please visit him!"
Neji did not heed Hokage's advice to visit the hospital. Returning home, he carried all repercussions of the damages they both made to the landscape. He claimed responsibility for subsidizing reparations to any buildings within the walls that may have suffered disturbances to its foundation.
"Perhaps, this will keep me distracted for a while," Neji thought. However, he knew it was a fruitless endeavor. All that was in his mind was only his struggles. His shadow had been severed. Everyone around him cheered him to find a meaning to live for. But living was so hard to do.
The sun had descended down Earth and night readily approached. Neji sat in his bath. The water stilled, not even a ripple was in sight. His eyes lingered dully on the rim of the bath. They never moved.
A peal of sharp laughter escaped his mouth. There was a smirk on his lips. The water rippled before it returned to the calm sea. Neji did not recall being a troublemaker in his life until now. It was ironic that he was one now and he laughed because of how absurd it felt to him. The genius caused significant trouble. Truly, he must feel guilty. But no, Neji merely brushed it off his shoulder.
As the water began to cool, he arose in a lame manner. Water droplets ran down his bruises and scars. Seeing himself in the mirror, he hated himself. A battle-torn rag doll was what's left of him. How could anyone play with the idea of loving him? Not even the woman closest to him wanted anything to do with him.
Neji sat in the seclusion of his father's dojo as night capered around him. The single candle within the room allowed such dance to occur.
He tried meditating his woes away. His mind was far from Tenten. His teacher's words sprinkled in his mind; he no longer had a reason to live for. He could not live for himself. There was no more reason to wake up again. And yet, he sat in silence through the slow passing night.
A series of knocks pounded at his gate, disrupting his teetering meditation. Neji activated his bloodline; his sight rushed to find the person at the foot of his compound. That person was his uncle.
Sitting formally across one another in his father's tiny welcome room, Neji lowered his gaze. "I cannot offer you anything tonight," Neji relayed to his uncle.
"No need for that. Coming here at this hour is already improper," Hiashi aided. He paused, drawing a complete image of his nephew's surroundings. His eyes barely moved, "Every corner of this house is shrouded in darkness."
His nephew said nothing.
Hiashi inferred that he shouldn't incite such small talk. The muscles in his back tensed and he closed his eyes, "The elders are growing impatient with your noncompliance to compete for my position. Hanabi has no intention to take over."
"I will not be privy to the council that branded me," Neji responded. "Even now, I am a puppet to you. You will place me on the throne and use me as a shield to change the Hyuuga's ways as you wish. As noble as the name is, I am ashamed to be a Hyuuga. I don't wish to struggle with clan politics. Your coming here at this hour has already impeded the freedom I seek. If you've no other matters to discuss, I don't wish to hear it."
Hiashi swallowed his pride and chose to pardon the young man's impertinence. "Your actions today showed me how much you've inherited the byakugan."
"I reckon the Hokage had reached you."
"Afterwards, yes," Hiashi maintained, "But my curiosity found your battle with your comrade marvelous. Nonetheless, you are still a part of the Hyuuga Clan. Your responsibilities extend to me as well."
Neji's eyes flickered to his uncle, "You shouldn't help someone who wants nothing to do with you."
"This old man may not know what you're going through, but his heart and mind intend to help you."
"Uncle-"
"You've done more than you should have in saving my daughter. I can only repay you with-"
"You don't need to pay me anything!" Neji raised his voice, "I don't need to be compensated for anything. If you could just forget about me, that would be enough."
Hiashi stared at his nephew with worrisome eyes. A glint lit in his pearly orbs and a smile almost graced his lips, "Perhaps I could convince the council to give in to that comrade of yours."
Neji glared at Hiashi with ill intent. His hands fisted at his knees upon mentioning his comrade.
"She is a strong shinobi. I'm sure she will not impinge your title-"
Neji would no longer entertain his uncle. He stood to his feet in haste and stared down to the older man, "My relationships have nothing to do with you nor the clan. And to think you'd even fancy the idea that we'd be together, if she wanted us to be together," Neji walked to the door and stood beside it, "It is late, please see yourself out."
Hiashi watched as his nephew politely asked him to depart.
"It does not concern you who I marry. No matter which background this person may be from, I do not look towards you nor the clan for approval before I make my choice. Please leave."
Hiashi stood up calmly and exited the welcome room. A gush of nostalgia rushed to him as his observations connected two points. He turned to his nephew with a somber smile, "I don't recall visiting your father and you even once when the sun was younger. But now I see that I am filled with regret wishing I could have treated you both better."
Neji averted his gaze and opted to stare intensely at the wooden beam.
Hiashi looked at his nephew's troubled expression and dropped what's left of his smile, "I will find a way to lift your burden. Your father trusted me to do so in the brief moment we met during the war."
Neji's eyes hardened at the mention of his father. His orbs grew glossy and clouds shrouded his mind. He could not watch his uncle depart until after the gate closed behind him. It was only then that he completely collapsed to his knees. "How could you not come and see me?" Neji whispered to himself, "Are you too embarrassed of your son that you wouldn't visit me?"
They said winter nights were the longest but this summer night was stretching on for too long.
Neji couldn't bother to spread his futon. He leaned by the wall of the welcome room deadpanned. His eyes stared out to the opened door. He focused on nothing.
"I'm not greedy, I only need one person to love me," Neji murmured. Breathing became hard to do. He had to think about each breath and exhale conscientiously.
Thinking of her made him lose track of time. He truly wondered about her sacrifices made for him. Had she not been there, would he be somewhere else? And if she didn't aid him everywhere he asked, would she still be his shadow?
Neji could hardly recall their kiss. It was so dull; it felt like an unimportant dream. Should he hate this woman? She confessed her feelings and shut them both down all at once. Could he hate her?
"But I can't hate you," his voice trailed off, "because then I won't have anyone I like."
Although he had friends, the feel of being alone was too overwhelming. They spoke of grandiose dreams as if it was reachable. But to him, what he truly wanted was just one thing: purpose. And yet, in this world, he felt purposeless, unbefitting in any place that he stepped into. Perhaps he had lived past his dues. But even if he had, there was not a single person here who wanted to understand him.
No one wants to see my heart. No one.
The more the sun rose, the hotter it got. Neji ambled across the village before it peaked at noon. Per Lee's request, he intended to visit his teacher today.
But as his feet moved along the spotty dirt path, they strayed. His mind had become preoccupied with notions of her. He wondered if she was in as much pain as he was. Although it was unfitting of her to feel such ways for she was content with having him be dead. However, he was curious. And despite making excuses as to why he was walking around her neighborhood, he wanted to see her.
It was not as if he was keeping an eye out for her. Although he certainly was watching for a head with a pair of twinned buns. Neji did not expect his eyes to gravitate toward her so quickly. But as if it was muscle memory, his eyes captured her twin buns and spotted her out of the teeming morning market. His heart skipped a beat and he had to ask himself how much longer would it take to see her without such a reaction. Swallowing his strumming heart, he walked in her direction.
Neji battled himself whether he should ignore her and keep walking or greet her as any comrade would. The nearer he got, the more his mind settled for the former.
All that she was doing was going about her morning groceries. Neji inferred she probably had no idea he was within her sight. She looked as if she was in her own mind. There was not a sense of her keen ears perking for danger.
His feet confirmed on walking past her just as he was just a couple meters from her back. He could pretend he did not see her. He could act as if today never happened. He could act as if it was merely coincidental if she chose to turn around at this exact moment which she did not And yet, the world intended for her to feel his presence.
"Neji!"
That voice belonged to the blonde boy, a man whom he harbored no hard feelings for. Neji turned to the direction of the man.
The woman who seemingly crouched to pick onions snapped her head towards the voice. She slowly straightened up, seeing the back of the young man who kissed her two days ago.
"Naruto," Neji greeted the bright young boy.
"Where were you during the festival? We were looking everywhere for you!" Naruto hopped to him in a beat, "So, I guess you and Tenten are together, eh? She was so drunk that night, we were wondering where you were so you'd take her home…"
Neji slowly turned his attention back to the woman behind him. When their eyes met, he knew she'd heard their little conversation. However, there was little for him to hide from. She had spotted him already. Walking away would be informal. After all, they were comrades, were they not?
Although she did not look to be hungover, she sure did look a bit sick. She watched him with her round orbs. It was as if she was delighted to see him.
Why must you look at me like that?
"... I mean everyone and pretty much everyone heard it," Naruto blabbered on, "At first I thought- nah, you and Tenten?! But then I asked Tenten and she wouldn't say a thing! Drunk! You should've taken her home, my back was sore all night because of her. How could a dating man not bring his girlfriend home-"
"No," Neji uttered softly. He kept his eyes on her own as her grin demolished to a small smile.
Naruto tilted his head in confusion, "No? No, what?"
"We-" Neji gave in to her settlement, "-we're not dating." He won their staring competition, albeit bitterly.
Her lips pressed thinly and she quickly averted her gaze.
Neji took it upon himself to escape the two of them. Being sandwiched between an idiot and a woman who he must treat as if his love no longer lingered was torturing him.
Neji began to walk past her, severing their eye contact from his side, "Why should I take her home? She'd never drink past consciousness."
Naruto chased after him, "But you kissed her?"
"How do you know that?"
"Because Sakura saw and told us?" Naruto pranced around the genius, "What do you mean you two aren't dating? Is this supposed to be some secret relationship?"
"Neji," Tenten called out to him.
Her voice echoed in his head as he walked a couple more steps. It was then that he firmly closed his eyes, jaws unclenched, and turned around. Pretending to be comrades was harder than before their confession.
Tenten ambled to him, fishing through her bag for something.
"Tenten?" Naruto exhaled. "What is going on?"
She looked up with a plastic smile and replied to Naruto, "What's so special about a kiss? It was just a kiss, a goodbye kiss."
Neji searched for anything else to focus on. Being petty over a kiss was unruly for someone like him.
"Goodbye kiss?" Naruto questioned. "How- what?"
"We're not dating, Naruto," Tenten assured him. "We don't like each other." She stopped in front of Neji just an arm's length away and handed a punnet of strawberries out to him, "They're not too sweet this season. I managed to grab two."
Neji's eyes gradually lifted from her strawberries to her orbs. Those dark orbs that wouldn't leave him left him helpless. For a split second, he pondered whether he should tell her or not. He did not want to hurt her, "I liked them because you liked them," he declared.
"Oh," Tenten uncomfortably murmured, her eyes fell in embarrassment.
"I still like you," Neji affirmed. Tenten's eyes darted to meet his own. She was breathless and her heart felt shaken.
"I still like you very much. But don't speak for me. Bear with me, I'm still learning to let you go. I'll try to be the comrade you need, that friend you can count on." He pushed the punnet of strawberries towards Naruto, careful not to touch her hand, "Don't offer me any more things. These gestures may be harmless to you, but I cannot accept them. It will be harder to accept your rejection-"
Naruto gasps hard.
Neji closed his eyes, finding the blonde boy annoying, "-It'll be harder to be just your comrade." His fingers fell off the punnet and were swallowed by his sleeve, "Thank you for the strawberries."
Tenten's eyes lingered on the strawberries as he disappeared into the crowding market street. A deep melancholy attached itself to the fruit. She wanted to return the strawberries.
"Tenten, did I just hear that you rejected Neji?!" Naruto howled.
"Yeah," she replied dryly.
Naruto watched as the woman stomped away from him in a haste. He is speechless.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know that," Naruto fell in line with Neji's pace.
"What do you want?" Neji asked him.
Naruto sulked, "It feels rather odd to be going to your clan's compound when you don't live there anymore. But, I haven't seen Hinata-chan for a while. I was wondering if-"
Neji turned sharply to him, halting his trek to his teacher's place. Something bitter sat at his tongue, "-If I could go and fetch my cousin for you?" he asked rhetorically.
Naruto was taken aback. But lacking general awareness for such a tone, he replied, "Well, yeah."
Neji glared at the blonde boy tiredly, "I believe my intentions were quite obvious when I moved out of the compound."
"What do you mean?"
"You are still the idiot from before," Neji's glare softened. He turned around and continued moving forward."
"Wait, what is that supposed to mean?" Naruto chased after him, "As a matter of fact, I've gotten smarter-"
Neji smirked, "It doesn't matter whether you're smart or not, Naruto. After all, you're God's incarnation. You'll be guided to glory either way."
Naruto fell off with the older man's pace. The sorrowful expression on his face made his shoulders droop, "I'm just a person."
"Then don't bend me to do your bidding," Neji said aloud, "go ask for my cousin yourself."
Fate has commanded me enough.
Naruto looked at him grow smaller the farther he got. However, the man's shadow was smaller than his own.
The year that passed felt more hollow than the year before. Naruto hadn't seen the long-haired man as much as before. It was as if his courage diminished whenever he laid his eyes upon those white eyes.
He ran to Neji and slung an arm over the taller man's neck. The cowardice slowly became buried as his facade entered the light. Naruto chuckled loudly, "Let's hang at Ichiraku's tonight! I'll convince others to come!"
Neji leaned away from Naruto's face inching closer to him. He shook the man's arm off and displayed uncertainty in his answer.
"You skipped out on the festival, you have to come this time," Naruto rubbed his wrist, a wide grin still stamped on his lips. "The guys gotta know who won the fight. Personally, I think you won."
Neji glanced at Naruto, his pace never faltered. He giggled, "Sure."
Neji felt dread sitting at the pit of his stomach whenever he visited his teacher.
The thing is, with his teacher, words felt hollow.
Promises were made to be broken with his teacher. Perhaps Neji hadn't opened himself enough for his teacher to help. As a Hyuuga, his pride came first. And perhaps, his teacher saw him as a Hyuuga before a student. It may be why treading on thin waters was so difficult to do so. Uttering the Hyuuga clan kept the both of them on their toes.
Neji idled around his teacher's home, taking a glimpse at the photos on the man's walls. Those memories of their first meeting began to rekindle. Meanwhile, his teacher was boiling a teapot as a courtesy to a guest.
The shadows in the room were dark. Only one window curtain was parted. Despite the brightness of the day, it could not save his teacher's home from looking so bleak.
Neji stopped in front of the parted windows. Looking out to the quiet neighborhood from which the older man had decided to reside, Neji felt uneasy. His teacher's home was dreary just like his own home. Save for the fact that his teacher's home was not as vast as his own, the rest was the exact same. The peering loneliness was always around the corner. This room that Neji stood on felt barren despite having been furnished completely. Ah, it was the silence that plagued both their homes. The same eerie silence that echoed in his teacher's home was here to stay.
"How about some chamomile tea?" his teacher's voice broke through the silence.
Neji turned around, offering a nod before walking to the couch. He lent a hand to the man's occupied hands who held a crutch and the tray.
"I'm still very capable, 'ole pupil," his teacher followed after with a mild hearty laugh.
"I don't doubt it, sensei," Neji continued to help guide the tray down to the wood coffee table until it laid flat with a low clack. It was only then that he lowered himself down to settle on the couch opposite of his teacher.
Gai plopped down on the couch with a massive sigh. He rested his crutch beside him before reaching for his cup of tea. He sipped it as did his student who mimicked him, "I'm rarely ever home these days. Only you could catch me lazing around."
Neji kept his eyes on his teacher's countenance. Behind that satisfied smile, there was much to unload. His teacher looked tired. His eyes were darker than usual. Even his skin hung from its bone, giving his teacher a haggard impression.
"I suppose I am the only one who can see you looking like this," Neji replied. He set the cup down and placed his hands on his knees.
"The other two might think I'm gravely ill for having no enthusiasm."
Neji said nothing. His eyes laid on his teacher's lowered ones.
A pint of sadness lingered around them.
Gai blew out an uneasy sigh and pressed his lips thinly, "Ease your back. You no longer live at the compound. It's okay to loosen up even if it's acting."
Neji snickered. He did not relax, though.
"Thank you for checking up on this old man," Gai conveyed.
"Lee told me to visit you from time to time."
"No wonder," Gai chuckled before sharply inhaling. His left hand rubbed his knee anxiously. "You only ever visit when you need things sorted out."
Neji bowed his head in shame, "I only ever put you in distress."
Gai smiled meekly.
"I seek your guidance but never follow them. I'm sorry."
"No, you're right to come to me. As your teacher, I'm here to help you," Gai's voice trailed off.
The melancholy within the room pervaded and a long silence ensued.
"As your teacher, I'm here to help you."
Gai's smile fell off the earth. He couldn't even count the number of times he said that to his student. Glancing to his student, he saw the eyes of an adult suffering the detriment that was the aftermath of facing death. Gai felt a lump at his throat. His student was only a boy, why must he bear the same eyes as his own teacher?
In points such as these, Gai felt utterly helpless. If he were to look back to his student's genin days, he would see that all of his "help" did not amount to anything. His student was struggling to fight his own fate and he could do nothing. The compromises and promises they've made from then were always broken.
"You promised never to let the Head Family thing get you riled up."
His power was limited. The curse mark was a part of his student and yet, he believed that the best way to power through it was to act as if it was not there. Gai realized it now that it did them both no good to act. Because he was unable to relieve his student's worries, he chose to ignore it with one promise.
The youth in front of him looked like a shell of himself. He resembled this old fool. It pained Gai to witness a reflection of himself peering back at him.
"I heard you and Lee destroyed mountains yesterday," Gai began shakily, offsetting his wilting emotions.
Neji did not speak. He was not ready to speak.
Gai let out a breath of astonishment, "I wondered when you'd get serious and showcase your growth. It's a shame I couldn't see it."
"It was merely a blemish," Neji responded humbly.
Gai gazed at his student's unwillingness to meet his eyes. He reached for the teacup and raised it to his mouth, "It seems you brought the distress here, but you won't say it," he sipped the warmed tea, "what is bothering you?"
Neji's nails dug to his knees. He almost caved in to relaxation before retaining the modest posture ingrained in his spine.
"I have to know what it is to offer whatever wisdom I have, Neji," Gai set the cup down without a sound. The tired eyes of his pupil reflected his own. Gai straightened up.
Neji took in a breath and parted his lips slightly but closed them as he exhaled. His eyes searched for a reasonable thing to say.
"Shouldn't you be delighted?" Gai asked him.
"Why?" Neji asked despondently.
Gai grinned and chuckled from his heart, "Word does spread quickly, doesn't it? I had an inkling that my two pupils have found solace in one another-"
Neji's brows furrowed. He gulped, "I think the world is punishing me right now."
"What?"
"I think the world is punishing me right now," Neji repeated. His eyes jittered, uncertain as to where to look to, "she rejected me. She could have told everyone we're not dating. But she didn't say anything. It's as if she's punishing me, making me accept how much she does not want me every time I tell people I've been rejected." Neji felt breathless. His lips quivered. "I shouldn't have lived. Every single pair of eyes that lay upon me are filled with pity. I don't want to be pitied. When I look back, I just want to be understood. I want to be accepted with warm hands from the people I trust my life with. Why, why is living so difficult, sensei? Is dying and living again supposed to feel so burdensome?"
"Neji-"
"I wake up in the blink of an eye and feel as though I'm in another body. That the person I am right now isn't myself. It's as if everyone keeps getting farther away the more I simply look. I'm tired of trying to act like the person I was before. As far as I feel, I've already died. Why did I get to live again?"
Gai forced himself from whimpering. Indeed, the student whom he had a hard time to bond with was in the same agony he was in now. His voice shook, unable to gain the confidence to even confront himself, "I understand that feeling, Neji. The feeling that your sacrifice was not great enough and so you must live in order to prove your worth later in life. I know it hurts right now. I know it's gnawing at both of us and its difficult to shake off, but you have to get along with it. You have to accept it, you cannot hate yourself for feeling this way."
Neji closed his eyes tightly, unwilling to tear up. His hands soon turned to fists.
Gai watched with painful tears as his nostrils flared.
"Relax, Neji," Gai advised, "don't keep everything pent up. You are only a human and it is only me here. Let go of yourself and cry. The world wasn't listening to your needs, it won't hear your cries now. Let out your sorrow and recover. Don't pretend to be strong when it is only us. Your shoulders cannot carry all this weight. Let it out," Gai comforted him, "cry. I won't listen unless you want me to."
One by one, the walls crumble. Neji brought his head to his knees and wept in his lap. With the gentle comfort of his teacher's supportive hand on his shoulder, Neji grieved for himself.
Unbeknownst to them, a boyish man with a knot above his eye leaned away from the wall with the window.