A/N: Requested anonymously on tumblr (anotheropti) as "Andy comforts April while she's in her first pregnancy." I've written about this before, but really... isn't this what's good and great in the world?

"Ugh," April complained before whining and wincing, hard.

Andy turned on instinct in the bed, looking drowsy and beat - most likely from the four in the morning craving that he couldn't go out to the grocery store to get - and immediately shook himself awake as best he could.

"What's up?" he asked.

"It's just… fuck," she groaned and sighed. "Ugh, this was, like, half the point of getting pregnant."

"What?"

"I've got cramps, dude," she whined again and shifted uncomfortably.

"Oh, it's a Brady Bunch contraction," Andy said knowingly. April just stared at him, as best he could tell in the dark, with a venomous glare. "It's a really weak contraction because you're really late in the pregnancy and the baby… wants to get out!"

"Braxton Hicks," April corrected, "and I know what it is but it sucks."

"Okay, okay... I got it, I remember," he said proudly and stood up. "C'mon."

"What?" she grimaced at Andy offering his hand to her, like she wanted to get up.

"Walking helps, that's what the doctor said. You know that, you're just super pissed and sleepy," Andy said softly and grinned. "C'mon babe. You trust me, right?"

Sighing, April took his hand and stood up slowly with his help. It took a few laps around the house before she felt less like a mountain was crumbling in her head and punching downward through her whole body. Andy kept talking, though, and she half-wondered if that was what really helped.

"Am I supposed to feel like there's a fire in my chest?" April asked, a sudden spike in pitch in her voice.

She was busy lying on the couch, attempting to alleviate the awful sensation in the center of her back and lower, when her chest suddenly burned. It was probably dinner coming to bite her back again, but she wasn't ready for this. Suddenly being an adult was lame again.

At her feet, trying to resist tickling them or massaging them, Andy was staring at her.

"Um-"

"Andy!"

"What?"

"I have heartburn," she groaned. "How do you deal with this? It's stupid, and it burns."

"Oh my God," Andy said, an epiphany across his face. "I think that's why it's called heartburn, babe! You're so smart-"

"Andy," she threatened with a hiss.

"Okay, okay. Just, um, gimme a sec," he offered her, shifting her feet back to the couch and bounding out to the kitchen.

Meanwhile, April dealt with the unceasing gross feeling just below her throat. If she wasn't so annoyed at it, she might throw up. Instead, she focused on the pain in her back and how the pillows against her felt amazing.

He returned with a glass of what looked like soda and she scoffed.

"Dude, I can't drink pop," she reminded him.

"It's okay. I checked with the doctor lady, who is super awesome by the way," he nodded. "C'mon, it's ginger ale."

"Is it Vernors?"

"Yeah, babe. Of course, you don't drink any other kind," he said.

Groaning, she grabbed the glass and was alarmed at how warm it was but nevertheless took a deep drink from it. Andy heated it up. It tasted disgusting, and had already swallowed it before the true horrors of the heated ginger hit her taste buds.

"Oh... ugh," she whined, making an exceptionally sour face.

"I know right?" Andy nodded, resuming his place at the other end of the couch. "It's really gross."

April always asked for weird food as a joke before. Ordering at restaurants, or from Leslie at work years before, she did it just to get a rise out of that person, wondering how they could remotely serve a fresh human leg or snails and salsa.

Now, she actually really wanted anchovies and onion and pineapple pizza.

Except when she got it, and it looked like a rotting pile of stink. Then she made Andy go get her some tuna salad, and for whatever reason she had a really annoying crying fit because she's too needy right now and when he got home, she was just angry all over again.

Andy figured out that she had been crying, and then he felt worse and it made her feel worse.

Really, she couldn't wait to get the hellspawn out of her.

"So, you need-"

"Clothes, and my monster makeup," she explained to him.

"And your mix-"

"My birthmix, and my picture of us, and my tiny guitar, and my stuffed dog and-"

"Babe," Andy interrupted her, holding her shoulders as she breathed heavily, panicking. "You're getting super agitated. You gotta calm down. I'll go get the dog, and the mix, and everything... it's all in the bag Leslie made us make."

"I know, but the baby is-"

"Okay, I know. I know!" Andy shouted, leaving a kiss on her forehead and darting out of the room to where their emergency bag was kept in the Pawnee cabin. "Babe, I got it!" he screamed from the other room. "Baby Ludgate-Dwyer is on the way!"

April cracked a tiny smile before her face contorted in pain once more. It better be on the way, and fast.