"Jeez, you two look nasty."
It was the first thing I heard as I slowly came awake again, the sun shining directly into my eyes. Something blocked it out, giving me a minute to clear my vision and realize that my cousin's head was what was shielding me. Sheik continued to look down at me with all of his usual jovialness.
"Yeah," I said slowly, making sure Zelda was still held tight against me. She was. "Dying isn't usually all that pretty."
"Geez, you died?" he asked, for once surprised.
"Yeah, but I got over it."
"What was it like?" I didn't answer right away. The parting words of the Spirit of the Hero rang in my head, along with the melodic voice of Hylia. Both of them had looked happy. And proud. Like what I imagined my parents would look like if they were still alive. I decided that memory was mine. Maybe I'd tell someone about it someday. But not today.
"Don't remember," I finally said. "Lots of white, felt a pull, and then I was alive again. Which sucked by the way, I don't recommend it."
"Noted, if I die, stay dead. No zombification for me." I laughed, even though it hurt a little. Sheik's usual madness was just what I needed after fighting a god.
"Wait a second, what the hell are you doing here?" I suddenly asked, realizing that Sheik inexplicably showing was completely unexpected.
"Oh, yeah, we saw the light show from the castle, so a few of us Sheikah came over to see if you were following all the proper safety precautions. Since you're alive, I figure you're fine, but the rest are down there poking around for the rest of Ruin. What happened, you blow him up?"
"Erased him actually," I said, noticing Zelda was slowly shifting in my arms. It didn't seem like she was waking up though. "Took a sword in the chest for it, but I don't think he's coming back. And if he is, it's not going to be for a long ass time."
"Good, I figured it was something suitably dramatic, since all we could find of him was that nasty ass sword. Which looks awesome but is giving me more evil vibes than Shade after he's been woken up early."
"Sounds about right," I said, exhaustion creeping back in around me. "Anything else you need from me before I pass out?"
"Nah," Sheik said, his light-hearted tone strangely soothing for how annoying he usually was. "I've got the important stuff, we'll take it from there. Take a snooze, I'll talk to you in a few days when you finally wake up."
"Sounds good…." I trailed off, words slurred as my body's pleas for sleep overrode my fleeting desire to stay awake.
When I finally woke up again, I was in a bed so comfortable that I immediately wanted to fall asleep again. There was only one place that had mattresses this good and a quick glance around the room confirmed it. No where but Hyrule Castle would have matching hand-carved wall sconces for decorative candles.
I shifted slightly, slowly forcing myself awake. I realized Zelda wasn't pressed against my side anymore, but a quick look revealed that she was laying next to me, still asleep. I took a minute to appreciate her stunning beauty before grudgingly rolling out of the bed and making my way into the bathroom to clean myself up.
The shower felt positively divine after everything I had gone through, and, having been a god for a good hour, I knew what I was talking about. I assume someone had cleaned the worst of the blood off of me in my sleep, but nothing substituted a hot rinse. I was just in the middle of scrubbing my long clean when I heard a yell from outside the bathroom. I froze, thinking I might have imagined it, but over the sound of the water I could hear unsteady breathing and the trembling sound of Zelda's voice calling my name.
Without bothering to turn off the water, I bolted out of the shower, hastily wrapping a towel around my waist. Throwing the bathroom door open, I saw Zelda sitting up on the bed, sheets wrapped around her as she looked around in a panic. She seemed to relax as soon as she saw me, but still pulled herself out of her tangle of blankets. I rushed forward, meeting Zelda's outstretched arms at the edge of the bed and holding her tightly.
"It's alright, you're okay. It's okay," I said, trying to calm my trembling girlfriend. She didn't cry, just kept her arms wrapped around me, ignoring the water that dripped off of me. Her head was pressed against my chest. She kept moving slightly, until her pointed ear was sitting on my left pectoral muscles. Over my heart, I realized.
"Sorry," she finally said, her voice much calmer. I didn't respond, just held her a tiny bit tighter. "I just woke up and you weren't here. I knew you were in the bathroom, but I just…"
"It's fine, Zelda, you don't have to explain yourself. We just fought the incarnation of all-consuming evil. I'd almost be more concerned if we didn't have some sort of PTSD." She laughed, her normal cheerful self breaking through the lingering tense atmosphere. Zelda slowly pulled away from me, looking me over, and I remembered that I was almost entirely naked.
"Shame I was freaking out, this would have been a nice sight to wake up to," she murmured, running a hand down my wet abs.
"Yeah yeah. If you're done, I've still got half a shower to take."
"I'm not," she shot back, her hand continuing to wander. "If you didn't want me to drool over these muscles, you should have put on a shirt. Plus, I saved your life, therefore you owe me."
"I didn't realize molesting me was fair trade for saving a life. In which case, I have numerous previous instances that I would like to brink up and cash in on," I said, not entirely disliking the way her hands traced the contours of my torso.
"Not allowed," Zelda said quickly.
"Why not? Hardly seems fair to me."
"It's not fair, but I don't care. I am the girlfriend; therefore, I make the rules."
"According to who?!"
"Me, of course. After all, I'm the girlfriend." I sighed, knowing that I wasn't going to win against her. Not that I had any real desire to anyways. I settled for pulling away and walking back towards the bathroom.
"I'm going to finish up, if you don't mind, Miss Girlfriend."
"If you walk like that, certainly not," I heard her say from the edge of the bed.
I ignored that.
A few hours later, we were in yet another parlor room with Princess Felia, Sheik, Impa, and Hunter, who had apparently shown up on his own time when he heard what had happened. Where a normal parent would have been freaking out and livid at what Zelda and I had done, namely confronting a god, Hunter was as chill and casual as ever. I suppose that's what you got when your guardian was a member of an ancient race of bodyguards and assassins.
"If I didn't know better, I'd call bullshit on the whole thing," Felia said, earning herself a stern glance from Impa. Zelda and I had just finished telling them all about everything that had happened since we left the castle days before, and I had to agree with Felia. Retelling what had happened to us only made it more apparent how ludicrously insane what we had done was, even without acknowledging the fact that we had somehow won.
"Makes for a great story for sure. I can see it now, the Chronicle of Sheik, costarring Link and his girlfriend. Sounds good, no?" Sheik said, impetuous as ever, before Zelda smacked him down with a bolt of magic.
"As the goddess in all of this, I think my name at should at least be in the title. 'Costarring Zelda and her boyfriend' has a much better ring to it," Zelda said. I tried to raise an objection, only to be shot down immediately. Apparently saving the world wasn't enough to get name dropped as a 'supporting' character.
"We recovered Ruin's sword," Impa said, all business despite Sheik's attempts at further stupidity. "We're working to try and purify it, but I've never felt such a powerful aura from something before. It is very possible we will be forced to hide it somewhere and hope no one ever finds it again."
"Wherever you hide it, make sure it's buried deep," I said. I would rather the sword be destroyed entirely, given the option, but I had felt the power of that sword first-hand. If Impa said it couldn't be done, I was more than willing to believe it.
"Don't worry," she said. "We recently discovered a chasm beneath Spectacle Rock above the Gerudo Canyon that will do nicely. The Sheikah will take care of it."
"Alright, great, so we done? Because these two are still basically dead on their feet. More sleep is definitely needed," Sheik said pointedly. I couldn't argue with him, I was definitely still exhausted and could only assume Zelda felt the same.
"Of course. You two saved the kingdom and the world itself. I think we can leave anything else for another day," Felia said, thankfully agreeing. I was pretty sure if we had gone on for any longer, I was going to fall asleep anyways.
One car ride from Sheik and a few hours later, I stumbled into my bed, haphazardly shrugging the Master Sword off my shoulders and letting it fall to the floor. Normal me knew the sword deserved more respect, but current me thought my bed looked better than Zelda and nothing was going to keep me from it. Not even Zelda herself, who was trying and failing to lay down next to me with more grace. Her supporting arm gave out and she collapsed into the bed, not bothering to disguise her hum of utter pleasure as she scooted closer to me.
"Finally done…" she mumbled into my chest, eyes already closed. "Stupid quest."
"Not done yet," I grudgingly said. "Still have to make sure Ruin's sword is put away, release Ganondorf, hide the Triforce, return the Master Sword, figure out what to do with all our magic artifacts, go-"
"Shhhh….sleepy time, not thinky time. Worry about all that…later…" Zelda mumbled, one finger haphazardly pressed to my lips to shush me. Her other arm snaked around me, holding us close together as she pressed her face into my chest. I had to admit she was right. The bed, my bed, was fantastic and perfect, exactly what I needed after traipsing around Hyrule nonstop for a few weeks. Everything else really could wait, we weren't on a time crunch anymore. The world was successfully saved, and it would probably stay that way long enough to take a nap.
"Okay, you win," I whispered, expecting a clever retort from Zelda. I didn't get it; the only thing I could hear was the slow thump of her heart and her equally slow breaths. I looked down at her sleeping face, forcing myself to stay awake to appreciate her beauty. Unfortunately, I couldn't last any longer, finally falling asleep with my arms hugging the girl I loved.
"No way you did that. There's no way! Mikau, tell me there's no way this gangly doofus managed to fight off a flaming centipede."
"There's no way," Mikau said, taking a sip of his drink.
"Thank you!" Kafei exclaimed, gesturing towards the Zora as if his point was proved. "There's no fucking way you did that."
"I don't know what to tell you, man. I've got the scar to prove it, not to mention it's dead and I'm not," I said from the opposite couch, my arm slung over Zelda's shoulder. Scattered around the living room were Shade, Sheik, Midna, Mikau, Anju, Lulu, and Kafei, most of who were listening with rapt attention as I told them about my and Zelda's fight against the monster at the bottom of the Din fountain. They had all come over (or come downstairs in Sheik and Shade's case) to hang out and hear about the insanity Zelda and I had been busy with. Though in the case of Kafei and Mikau, it seemed they had just come over to doubt my story.
"If you've got the scar, I should be easy enough to prove. So come on, shirt off, let's see it," Kafei said, ignoring his girlfriend scoffing at his side.
"Babe, really?" Anju asked. It almost sounded like she was pleading with Kafei, which, with what I knew about the stubborn man, probably wasn't far from the truth. Kafei, however, was not swayed.
"Yep, strip it dude. You tell a story like that, you've got to back it up."
"It's not enough that Zelda backs me up?" I asked, more so for the fun of it than out of genuine protest. Riling up Kafei was a time-honored tradition.
"Nope, take it off, I want definitive proof."
"Okay, fine," I said, finally removing my arm from Zelda's shoulders to stand up, quickly tugging my shirt over my head. Through the rustling fabric, I could hear appreciative sounds from the women in the room.
"Dang Zelda, you're one lucky girl," Lulu said, her quiet, melodic voice soothing to the ear. Ever since she agreed to sing with Mikau, she had been taking voice lessons, which only made her natural voice sound better.
"I'm aware," Zelda said from the couch. I finished pulling my shirt off, leaving my scar-riddled torso completely exposed.
"No, but seriously, how do you not ride him every day? Those pecs look like they're made of steel!" Anju exclaimed, openly staring at my chest.
"Always happy to be objectified," I mumbled.
"Yeah, come on Anju, stop staring," Kafei said, trying to draw his girlfriend's attention away from me.
"Maybe you should work out more then," she said, poking him in the stomach and making him grunt. "Because the only thing those abs shred better than cheese is the hearts of poor, hungry women. My gosh, I could just lick them…" Anju kept staring until Zelda wrapped her arms around my torso.
"Sorry Anju, the only one that gets to actually drool over him is me," she said. I was pretty sure she was running her hands over my muscles for effect rather than just because she could, but I was okay with either one.
"Zelda, on behalf of all womankind, tap that," Lulu said, extremely serious.
"Don't worry, I plan on it," Zelda hummed. I suddenly became aware of just how much she was pressing herself against me, told clearly by the two rather large areas of cloth touching my back. Luckily, Shade didn't want to hear it and swiftly interrupted.
"Okay, enough of that. Which scar are we looking at? Or do we have to guess?" he asked. I looked down at the plethora of scars that crisscrossed my body and arms, each one marking a close call.
"Let's see, it's…this one here," I said, pointing to the long line that sat a little below my collarbone where I had gotten swiped by the Inferno Centipede.
"I still call bullshit," Kafei said. Apparently hard proof wasn't enough to sway his opinion.
"You are impossible," Anju said, scooting closer to her boyfriend.
"I second that," Midna said just as the doorbell rang. Sheik immediately launched himself backwards and towards the door, opening it just in time to be tackled by a small redhead.
"Augh, Link, quick, use your hero magic to save me from this monster!" he shouted dramatically as Romani giggled madly.
"Nah, you're on your own," I called back without hesitation, not feeling the slightest bit bad about my decision.
"Traitor!" my cousin called back, pretending to struggle a moment more before teleporting a few feet away, leaving Romani to scramble after him.
"Some things never change," Cremia said from the doorway, a tall man with bright red hair right behind her. "Everyone, this is Groose, my boyfriend," she said, quickly getting introductions out of the way. I quietly slipped my shirt back on and settled back in next to Zelda, who wasted no time laying her legs across mine.
"Nice to meet you all," Groose said proudly, combing his flamboyantly styled hair with his fingers. He seemed nice enough, a bit of a braggart, but honest and straightforward. I could see him being right at home at Lon Lon Ranch.
"What did we miss?" Cremia asked, sitting down on a free chair.
"We were just discussing how Link is absolutely a liar and couldn't have possibly saved the world," Kafei said.
"Is there nothing that will convince you?" I asked, half sure that even if I had video evidence, he still wouldn't believe me.
"Lemme see the sword," he said quickly, leaning forward eagerly. Anju rolled her eyes.
"Men and their sharp toys," she said, though she couldn't maintain the air of indifference. I could tell she wanted to see it too. I was half-tempted to tell them I had already returned the Master Sword to the Temple of Time, but, after a bit of cajoling, went upstairs to grab it. Everyone followed me into the backyard as I unwrapped the sword from a blanket I had it hidden in.
"Damn…" Mikau mumbled as I pulled my sword free of its sheath, the pale blade humming in my hand.
"Cool, hand it over," Kafei said, immediately holding his hand out. I looked at him with a bemused face, glanced over at Zelda, who just nodded encouragingly, and looked back at my friend.
"You do realize that there are literally only two people in the world who can lift this sword and neither of them is you, right?" Kafei promptly ignored me, continuing to hold out his hand.
"Stop teasing him, just let him crush his own dreams," Zelda said, grabbing the Master Sword from me and handing it to the eager Kafei. He happily grabbed it, only to collapse to his knees as soon as Zelda's hand was removed from the hilt.
"The hell…Link, how'd you do this? This…is…bullshit!"
"I warned you," I said, trying to hide my amusement at the faces Kafei was making as he tried to lift my sword. Shade and Midna made no attempt to do the same, their giggling getting progressively louder the longer he struggled.
"Mikau, get over here and help me with this thing. We can rule the world together!" Kafei yelled, only to have the Zora man shake his head.
"Nah, I'm good. Have fun embarrassing yourself though," he said, chuckling with Lulu. Kafei kept trying for another minute before giving up with a huff.
"Bullshit! Groose, you're massive and strong, right? Get over here and lift this sword!" The big man looked surprised to be addressed, but with a little encouraging from Cremia, he stepped up to the sword laying on the grass.
"Go on babe, just try," Cremia said over the sound of Kafei's encouraging chants, which were quickly stifled by Anju. We all waited and watched as Groose bent over and wrapped both hands around the purple hilt, tugging lightly at first before putting more and more effort into it. In a minute, his face was as red as his hair with effort, but the sword didn't budge.
"Damn it!" Kafei exclaimed once Groose finally gave up. I watched Zelda step forward and, with one small hand, easily lift my sword out of the grass, which only inspired more outrage from Kafei and amusement from everyone else.
"I'm not sure what it says about you boys if you can't lift something a skinny girl like me can," Zelda said, her voice taunting and joking.
"As if you're skinny, Zelda," Cremia said, poking my girlfriend in the boob. Zelda immediately returned the favor, jabbing at Cremia's larger ones.
"You have no right to judge me when you have these," she said, laughing.
"What about you, Mid? How do you measure up?" Shade asked from where he was standing next to the Twili girl, his probing finger swiftly knocked away before it could reach her chest.
"Ah ah ah, none of that. You had your chance," she said, immediately drawing all of our attention to them.
"Excuse me, what?" Kafei said, asking the question I absolutely did not want to ask. "Have you two been - mpph mmh mmm?" Whatever he was going to say was muffled by Anju's hands clamping over his mouth.
"I don't think I need the answer to that," she mumbled, keeping her hands in place until Kafei gave up and stopped struggling. She held her hands over his mouth for another few minutes as we chatted and laughed before making the mistake of letting him go.
"Hold on, didn't you say you had a shield too?" he asked immediately.
Hours later and after everyone looked at every piece of equipment Zelda and I had gathered during our journey, I finally waved goodbye to Cremia, Romani, and Groose as they left. Kafei, Mikau, Anju, and Lulu had all left earlier and Midna and Shade had disappeared upstairs once people started leaving. Sheik had disappeared somewhere too, leaving just me and Zelda. I found her sitting on a lounger in the backyard, looking up at the sky.
"So, you plan on tapping this, huh?" I asked, pulling Zelda's clear blue eyes to me. She smiled lazily and turned back to the slowly appearing stars.
"Well, you're not getting rid of me, so yeah, eventually," she said as I laid down in another lounger next to her. "It'd be pretty stupid to give up my soulmate to another woman."
"True enough," I said back, taking a moment to appreciate the darkening sky. I saw Zelda get up, only to sit down on my lap and lay back so her head was right underneath my chin. I gently wrapped my arms around her and savored her scent as I continued to watch the sky. We didn't say anything for a long time, just watching the night sky and the stars.
Eventually, my eyes slipped down to Zelda laying on my chest, her loose platinum blonde hair, spread across our shoulders. It had glimmered golden when she was Hylia, but I preferred the lighter color. Lower, her sculpted features, long lashes, and pretty nose sat above the warm lips whose taste I knew too well. Lower still, her body was as alluring as ever, toned and soft in all the right places, making me remember all the times I had seen her less clothed. She was gorgeous and perfect, more than I deserved.
"Beautiful," I said aloud without thinking.
"It is," Zelda said, not realizing I was looking at her. "It makes me glad we succeeded. So many people have no idea what we've done, and now they never have to. They can keep looking up and marveling at the stars without a care."
"I guess, but I wasn't talking about the stars," I said with a quiet chuckle.
"Oh," she said quietly, slowly craning her neck to look at me, her cheeks flushed.
"I'm glad I can still get a blush out of you," I said, staring into the boundless depths of her eyes.
"Probably always will," Zelda said. Neither of us moved for a minute. "Thank you. For calling me beautiful, I mean."
"It's true," I said candidly. "It always will be." Zelda hummed happily, looking at the sky one more time before getting up, pulling me along with her.
"Come on, let's go to bed, I'm tired," she said, walking into the house.
"Not too tired I hope, with that kind of invitation," I couldn't resist calling after her. I could see her laughing before she turned to look back at me. Her hair spun, bright in the dim evening light, and her lips were spread in a wide grin. Her eyes, beautifully pure blue, shone with happiness and amusement. She was every bit the goddess she was supposed to be, regardless of whose soul she held. She was undoubtedly perfect, and nothing could convince me otherwise.
"Don't get your hopes up," she said, still playful and flirtatious, and disappeared into the house. I glanced up at the stars again, taking another minute outside, before going after my girlfriend, idly wondering how long it would take to tease her into kissing me.
The final chapter, a short epilogue will follow in...let's be real, it's probably going to be an hour or two at most. Final author's note will follow. So review now, or then, or both, or whatever. I'm going to be responding to any further reviews in PM's.
Speaking of reviews, (((Okay, I just wrote out the whole review section and then accidentally deleted it. I'm very sorry, I don't have the strength to write it all out again. I am just going to say thank you all for your exceedingly kind words, I'm honored that you love my story that much. An abbreviated version of the usual will follow))) Oracle, glad you liked it, those are very high praises I don't deserve. Twilit Lord, yes, thanks. Hero, hell yes, that's all that's left. Linkmaster, no, but it did pull inspiration from it. Queen Emily, thank you, thank you. Matteo, glad you enjoyed. Silenttulip, sorry I killed him, glad you liked it. Silverblood, hope you're okay, sorry I had to kill Link, had to have some weight to killing a god. Hero again, yes, WW Dorf, the old man was the king from WW.
Okay, sorry that was not to the usual level, but I need to finish this damn story. Wasn't kidding when I said the epilogue will be up in a few hours either. This will be done today. Stay tuned and cheers!
~Aro