A/N: Requested by aubrey-softandsmall-plaza on tumblr!

Enjoy!

When Andy comes home covered in haphazard makeup and glitter all over his face, April has questions. None of them could have been answered by setting Ron Swanson up on a date and yet here they are.

At first it doesn't really register with her. By the time she's helping him wash everything off of his face in the kitchen sink, she can't help laughing at the idea.

"What, did I have something on my back?" Andy asks, trying to look around his shoulder at his back.

"No, I just... you set Ron up on a date?" April finally gets out through all the disbelief.

"Yeah, we helped a super cool lady fill in her holes today," Andy says and April gives him a confused and angry enough glare for him to clarify. "Like on her road. Uh, street. Outside her house!"

"And... you got her to go out with Ron Swanson," she still can't believe it.

"I mean, it was easy. I saw how into each other they were," Andy shrugs.

"Yeah, but I bet they'll only go out once," April sits up on the counter next to the sink and watches Andy scrub away the gunk on his face. "It won't last."

Andy keeps washing without talking, leaving her in a perfectly uncomfortable silence for a while. Maybe Andy realizes that she's right. Because of course she is. However, when he starts chuckling and turns the water off April's confidence wanes. He stops the water and flicks away droplets at her, face still covered in glitter.

"Oh, babe, you are so jealous!" Andy says with a smile she knows too well.

"Of what? Ron going on a date?" April rolls her eyes and tries to shield herself from the torrential downpour of his stupid hands. She yelps and he laughs again, and it's the most annoying thing ever. "Andy!"

"No, that I'm better at setting people than you are," he still has that dumb grin and she seizes up a bit at his accusation. "You're jealous I'm, like, a better matchmaker than you."

April can sense that he's right because despite what she thinks, isn't that always the case? Or maybe it's both, but her brain is bubbling over with too many thoughts. She crosses her arms, indignant. Andy simply stands his ground and doesn't let that stupid, gorgeous smile drop. Eventually, she can't help it.

"Am not," she says, turning to look away from Andy.

"Totally are," Andy slinks into her gaze. She turns again to look away. "Aw, you're mad! I didn't think it mattered to you-"

"It doesn't, and just because you got Ron and this mystery lady together and Tom and Ann broke up doesn't mean anything," April spills in a rage before calming down. Maybe that's all she needed. It didn't really matter. No other couple on the planet, and especially Pawnee, matters at all. "Besides, those are lame couples. They make dating lame."

"That's why we got married," Andy says and she nods, leaning in to give him a kiss but Andy pulls away before she can. "Wait, I think you're forgetting something."

"What? No, I already took-"

"No, babe, I set up Ben and Leslie!" Andy says with wonder in his eyes.

"That's gross. And lame. Who cares?" April just wants to kiss her husband, and more, and now he won't let her and it's getting frustrating. "Wait, did you tell them to go to the same snow globe museum or something?"

"No, I told him to spank her, duh," Andy is clearly reminiscing but April can't recall any of that night whatsoever. That Snakejuice concoction really scrambled the night in a weird way.

Still, she can't help but gape at Andy when he says it.

"You did what?" she can't conceal the laugh that comes out no matter how hard she tries.

"Oh, y'know, I just told him to roleplay like we do-"

"Ew," April is already trying her best to clear her mind and never let a single one of those mental images in her head. "Please don't tell me you're serious."

"Well, I mean he already knew he liked her but then I told him to just go for it, and boom... like a couple months later, they're dating!" Andy looks so pleased with himself that April can manage to evade the terrible nightmares that he might have just given her for now. "So, I was like Cupid's Bow."

"Arrow," she corrects on instinct.

"Nice," Andy nods. "You're so smart."

"I know."

"Except with setting people up," Andy adds.

"Ugh, how often are you gonna bring this up?" April rests her arms over his shoulders, wrists one over the other. He's so close and she wants to kiss away the dumb things he's saying.

"As long as you keep getting annoyed by it," Andy smiles when he says it before the rough and urgent kiss he leaves her.

It only dawns on her when Andy pulls her closer as he deepens the kiss with hands at her waist. "Dude, are you-?"

Andy's only response is another kiss. Hiking her legs around him, Andy picks her up as they kiss and awkwardly stumbles them towards the bedroom.

They don't make it much further than the living room.