Note: In all the fics that I've seen that deal with Ember Island, not one of them deal with what "I'm confused" did to Aang. They all are like "Katara was scared. Aang accepted that and they all lived happily ever after". Well, I wanted to put Katara in her place. Anyways, I hope you enjoy. Thanks.
Note 9-19-20: haha... shit. Well, I mixed my one shots up so anyone who's read this fic in the past week or so has been reading my fic Joy and Sorrow. So anyways this is just me fixing it.
He and Katara had been together for a month, and it had been the best month of his life. But one question had nagged at him in the back of his mind. *What happened at Ember Island?* He thought about it at least every day, but had always pushed it away. But he couldn't ignore it much longer, and he didn't want to wait.
He walked purposely towards the pond on the grounds of the Gaang's home in Ba Sing Se, which he knew was Katara's favorite spot. *Especially at this time of day.* He thought, looking up at the starry sky. He saw her back which was covered with a loose light blue tunic. He sped up his pace, gathering himself. He strode up to her and sank down at her side.
"What's up?" Katara said, looking at Aang. She frowned when she saw Aang's disgruntled expression.
"What happened at Ember Island?" He asked bluntly.
"Well... you were there," she responded, feigning ignorance of the question she knew he was really asking. He huffed, exasperated.
"What happened to all your 'I'm confused' stuff?" He asked sharply. "Because I don't know about you, but I'm still REALLY unclear about what happened that night. All I know is that I came out of that play with all my insecurities running in high gear, wreaking havoc in my mind, and after I kissed you —which I won't deny was dumb— you fed my insecurities even further. After that I spent all the hours I wasn't thinking about Ozai thinking about you. I'm running scenarios in my mind over and over, getting worse each time. 'Maybe she and Zuko have a thing', 'what if she doesn't actually love me in that way'. And to make it worse, I couldn't even move past it. If you had just said you didn't like me, I could've moved on. If you HAD said you loved me than I could... you know," he said, waving his hand between them. "In the end you had me jumping through emotional flaming hoops, and every time I jumped through the flames got bigger and the hoop smaller! I went off to fight Ozai thinking that you hated me!" He yelled. "And two questions have been knocking around in my head since the tea shop: What is it that justified messing with my head?! And what is it that changed between Ember Island and the tea shop?!" He screamed. He was now standing, and he noticed that the wind had picked up, the water in the pond rippling, the pebbles on the path quivering, the ends of the blades of grass singed. He realized that he was doing all of that, and forced himself to calm down. The environment stopped reacting. He looked over at Katara who was crying silently.
"I'm sorry," she said weakly after a moment, her voice breaking. "I did all of that because I was scared to get more attached to you. I didn't want it to hurt even more than it already would have if you had died. I see now that was the wrong way to go about it." Aang stared at her incredulously.
"I— wha— I can see the reasoning behind that, it's a really good idea and intention, but you really messed up the execution. It didn't even cross your mind to tell me you loved me —and as a result easing my insecurities and giving me a spark of happiness in such a depressing time— and then we could agree to postpone our relationship?" He asked, still incredulous. She shook her head.
"Ahhhhhh!" He cried, confused, angry, and amused all at the same time. "Why didn't you tell me this?!" He asked, suddenly enraged again at the thought. Katara quailed.
"I don't know!" She said, bursting into tears again. Aang felt suddenly full of guilt, his rage gone.
"Sorry," he said quickly.
"Don't be," she said. "I deserved it. I handled that situation horrendously."
"Yeah, well, like I said, it was a good idea." She nodded.
"Are we good? Anything I did wrong or that you need to rage about? Because if there isn't then I'm happy and we can move on," he said after a moment. She looked at him, surprised.
"You've already forgiven me?" She asked quizzically. He nodded. "Well, I don't have anything that I need to rage about." He smiled.
"Great! So how about we call it a night watch the stars, alright?" He asked. She smiled and pressed herself close against him and leaned her head on his shoulder. He put his arm around her and kissed her. Even he was surprised at how fast he had forgiven her. *I suppose I can't stay angry at Katara long* he thought, *she's just too beautiful.*
They sat in silence, Katara in Aang's arms, looking up at the clear night sky. Every once in a while Katara would look at Aang with a sad look to her face. After the fifth time she did it, he asked:
"What's up?" She shook her head and looked back at the stars.
"You know I saw you right? Giving me looks. Tell me, what's up?" He prodded further. She sighed.
"I still feel bad about—" she started.
"Don't," he cut her off. "I'm fine, and, anyways, I've messed up so many times that we can just count this whole thing as payback, alright?" He asked with a smile on his face. She giggled.
"I suppose so. Remember 'I'd rather kiss you than die?'" She asked, giggling again. He sighed which made her giggle even more.
"How could I forget? That was probably my all time low except the stupid Ember Island kiss," he said. She nodded.
"Well, I'm pleased to report your sweet talking skills have certainly improved," she said grinning. He also grinned.
"Thanks. You're not too bad yourself," he responded. They looked back up at the sky.
After a long time staring up at the sky, watching the stars flicker, Aang realized it was really late.
"We should probably get to bed. Imagine Sokka if he found you sleeping in my arms," he said and she laughed.
"It would be the meltdown to end all meltdowns. I suppose you're right," she replied, sighing and getting up. Aang used his airbending to blow Katara to her feet, and she yelped in surprise, but then started laughing. He airbended himself up and kissed Katara. After a moment they broke off and they walked back into the house in happy silence. When they reached their rooms they kissed, whispered good night, and shut their doors. Aang smiled to himself when he closed the door and flopped on his bed. He sighed contently and drifted off to sleep.