Paul sighed as he opened Peter's letter. He'd read it so often, he almost had it committed to memory. He glanced at the familiar scribble and suddenly Peter's voice was in his head.

'Hi Dad,'

He closed his eyes and memory filled in the rest by supplying Peter's gestures and mannerisms, so he let Peter speak directly to his lonesome heart.

'What can I say? I miss you like hell. I pray for you each day, and especially when I'm at my father's shrine (extra good luck for you that way.) I hope you aren't too lonely being away like you are and that the day of your return comes soon.

'Mom and the girls are fine. I know they are writing to you, too, so I won't tell you about them. Other than they miss you as much as I do.

'You know, I've decided love is a double-edged sword. I mean, when life is good, the love flows freely. You just revel in the emotion, but it can cut through your soul when the person you love isn't around. Right now, I feel like I'm bleeding.

'No, this isn't the way I wanted to do this letter. Damn, it's just that it's been so long since I've talked to you in person. I've already torn up the last six letters and I might tear this one up too.'

Paul smiled, recognizing Peter's frustration and imagined his desk filled with the torn fragments of letters started, but then destroyed.

'Mom told me she talked to you about what happened here and how I wound up in the hospital this last time. The rioting on the streets was so bad, it felt like the 101st was lost in some war zone. I guess I'm not soldier material, because I had no stomach for it. I don't know how you and Kermit lasted as long as you did.'

Paul thought of Peter's comment. "That's because you have the heart of a priest, son, not a soldier." He closed his eyes, visualizing Peter's response.

"I'm a cop. That's who I am. That's what I do," Peter would say emphatically, and then run a hand through his hair and murmur, "I'll leave the priesthood to men like my father. No, I'm just a plain old street cop."

"You may be a cop, Peter, but you've got a gentle side that you shelter from most of the world."

Paul set the letter down and stood slowly, stretching his back as he walked to look out the open front door. "What am I doing? Talking to letters when I'm not talking to myself? Dammit, I am losing it," he muttered, rubbing at the back of his neck in disgust.

The air was fresher following the rainfall and the night finally felt a little cooler. He inhaled the aromas of the jungle, from the intoxicating scent of flowers to the invigorating scent of newly fallen rain. Overall, it blended into something quite pleasant. Paul closed his eyes, able to enjoy the refreshing moment enough to settle upon the top stair and join in nature's revelry of a world washed clean.

After a moment, a different night of rain crept into his thoughts. Another night spent worrying about Peter and hospitals. Paul was being dragged back to the past again, its beckoning call, both enticing and relentless. He went along willingly. The present held little solace for his troubled spirit. Perhaps, in the past, he would find the comfort he so desperately needed.

So, he leaned against the railing that ran along the stairs and stepped back into the past once more.

oOoOoOoOo

Paul sat in a chair beside Peter's hospital bed when he heard a noise at the door. He glanced up to see Annie entering the room with Carolyn. He smiled and stood, going to embrace his oldest daughter.

Carolyn hugged him tightly. He pulled away, brushing the strands of hair from her eyes. It was so good to see her looking like her old self again. Those first few hours in the hospital emergency ward had been difficult ones, but Carolyn's emotional state improved once Annie arrived.

"I thought you were still sleeping, honey," Paul whispered into Carolyn's ear as he hugged her once more. He kept a hand on her shoulder, as if that would be all it would take to keep her feeling safe.

He spared a quick glance over at Kelly, still sleeping in one of the chairs in Peter's hospital room. The little one had refused to stay at the house with friends. Kelly was adamant that she wanted to stay with Carolyn and Peter. Paul didn't have it in his heart to force her to stay at home while the rest of the family was at the hospital. Hell, maybe he might have needed her with them more than she needed to be with them. If nothing else, that previous night had proved the definition of family went far beyond blood ties.

His youngest daughter had stayed awake most of the night, but had finally fallen asleep a few hours ago. Now, as the morning sun was nearly halfway risen, she slept like an angel adrift on a cloud.

Paul turned back to Carolyn, and found her watching him closely. The girl smiled for his benefit. "I'm really not tired, Daddy. Not like you and Mom. Somebody can sleep in my bed and I can wait with Peter."

Paul turned to face her fully. There was a difference about his eldest daughter. A coming of age. His little girl was turning into a young lady and he wasn't at all ready for the transformation.

He smiled and brushed his hand across her cheek. "I'm fine, honey, but maybe your mother should lie down for a bit."

Annie stepped forward and put out a hand for him to take. "I'm fine, too. Better than you. I hear that bruise Peter gave you last night is quite dramatic. If anyone here needs to rest, it's you."

Paul shook his head and then caught himself. Even after all the time he'd been with Annie, he forgot about her disability occasionally. "No, I couldn't sleep just yet. I want to wait until Peter wakes up. Once I know he's okay, then I will rest."

Kelly roused a bit, mumbling in her sleep, and Annie followed the sound, using her cane to guide her to Kelly's recliner. She knelt beside the dreaming child and rubbed her back as she whispered soft words of comfort.

Paul watched them for a moment before turning toward Peter's bed. Right then, he would have given anything for Peter to be dreaming like that. The last time Peter had moved was when the nurse came in to check his vital signs. Paul sighed with worry, rubbing his temple without realizing it.

"Does it hurt, Daddy?" Carolyn asked, moving closer to him.

He shrugged. "Some."

"Mom said the doctor told you that you needed a hospital bed of your own, instead of staying in here. I think she said it was for... observation."

Paul's glance darted toward Carolyn before looking over at Annie with Kelly and then stopped at Peter, as he deliberately avoided his daughter's worried stare. "I've had other things on my mind. I'll be fine, honey."

She leaned against him more, her hand squeezing his as she shuddered slightly. "I sure hope so. It was bad enough last night, but the thought of you being really sick would be just too scary for me to even think about."

Her gaze went downward as she whispered, "I start shaking every time I remember last night. I still can't believe it was real."

"It was real. Too damned real to suit me," he muttered, allowing his anger and fear to dissipate as he took her in his arms, kissing the top of her head. "But it's over now. It's all over and done with."

Annie walked up behind them, placing a hand on their backs. "It was an absolutely horrendous night, but with the courage and love of this family, everyone came home safely."

Paul nodded, slipping an arm around her waist. "I had some serious doubts that it would turn out that way. Thank God, I didn't trust those doubts."

Carolyn's gaze centered on Peter, becoming very sad. "All I could think of was that Peter and I were gonna be killed by that bear and nobody would ever know exactly what happened to us."

Annie leaned forward, placing her chin on Carolyn's shoulder and held it there as she wrapped her arms around Carolyn's waist from behind. "You had guardian angels watching over you, darling. I've always said this family is blessed. Last night just proved that point."

Carolyn nodded, but she still hadn't taken her eyes off of Peter's sleeping form. "He – he was so brave in trying to save Scooby. But I just couldn't believe my eyes! I mean, attacking a bear with a tree branch? What was he thinking?"

Paul followed her gaze to Peter. "He was trying to save your life."

Carolyn shuddered with the recall, and then finally glanced back toward Paul. "Peter really thought I was dead?"

Paul looked at her again and nodded. "He did. He was so full of guilt over the death of Scooby, and of you, that I thought I was going to lose him right then and there."

Carolyn's chin began to tremble for the first time since she'd entered the room. Paul knew what was causing it, as did Annie. It was time for the grieving process for Scooby to begin. His wife tightened her hold on Carolyn and they just let her cry it out.

No one said anything for a long while as the three held onto each other for support and shared loss. Finally, Carolyn pulled away. As she wiped at her eyes, she turned toward Peter. "I know he feels really bad about Scooby. Please don't tell him I cried like a baby over it."

Paul shook his head, taking her into his arms. "No, that would be lying and until Peter gets to know us all as well as we know each other, I think we need to be perfectly honest. Besides, he has to grieve the loss of Scooby too. He'd grown very attached to that dog in the months since he started coming to the house for visits."

Carolyn looked at him with eyes full of understanding and nodded.

Annie rubbed Carolyn's shoulder. "It might be nice if all of us went together to pick out a new puppy."

Carolyn stiffened. "No, I don't want a new puppy."

Paul was surprised. He had just assumed that Carolyn would want another dog. "No? Why not?"

Carolyn shook her head and pushed her bangs from her eyes. "It doesn't seem right. Not now. Maybe later."

"Okay, honey, you just say the word when you're ready," Annie said.

As Annie spoke with Carolyn, Paul slipped out of her hold and walked over to the window, looking out at the budding spring morning. Where had the horrors from the previous night gone? The scene he was staring at was freshly washed from the night's rains. Now, it was full of hope and promise replacing the black night's overwhelming despair.

Paul swallowed, grateful for the opportunity to spend another day with those he loved. Turning from the window, he asked Carolyn, "What happened after the bear gave up on you and Peter? How did you manage to get the two of you into that cave?"

Carolyn closed her eyes and began to cry again, unable to handle the sudden onslaught of memories. They were still too fresh for the youngster to process. She crumpled into Annie's arms and Annie caught just her before she fell to the ground.

Paul was beside them in an instant. He took the girl from Annie, lifting her easily into his arms and started out of the room. Annie held onto him, keeping up with his pace as she whispered, "It's too much for her to be up and about so soon. Shock and exposure can be very dangerous in a child her age."

Carolyn roused up and saw where they were headed.

"No! Daddy, I want to stay in here! I want to stay with everyone else!" she shouted hoarsely.

Paul stopped and looked into her panicked expression. The silent pleading tore at his heart. Glancing to one side, he saw another recliner chair where Carolyn could stretch out. It was nearly as good as a hospital bed.

"The only way you're staying here is if you keep your butt planted in that chair with plenty of blankets to keep you warm. Is that understood?"

Carolyn nodded emphatically. "Yes, Daddy, anything to stay."

"Annie?" Paul asked as he looked at her.

Annie answered by squeezing his arm. With his wife's blessing, he placed Carolyn into the chair, pushing it back to fully recline and then covered her with two blankets that had been stacked on a table for him.

"There, are you still feeling dizzy or lightheaded, honey?"

"No, Daddy, I'm fine. Like you, I'm fine."

Paul bit the inside of his lip at Carolyn's unintentional comment. He wasn't being much of a role model for taking care of one's self, but the thought of being stuck in another room in a hospital bed was more than he could tolerate. Apparently, his daughter felt the same way.

He brushed the hair from her eyes and bent to kiss her forehead. "I love you, sweetheart."

"I love you too, Daddy. All of you, even Peter. I'm just glad it's over with."

She had started to cry again, but this time it was with softly shared tears. Annie took her hand and murmured comforting words only a mother could manage. Paul watched as the fear dissipated and a calmness settled over Carolyn.

Once again, the girl's gaze went to Peter. She started speaking in a quiet whisper, as if that tone would help to keep the tears at bay, and she answered Paul's earlier question without being asked again.

"When – when the bear left me and went over to Peter, I thought it was gonna get him for sure. I was ready to jump up and start screaming at it, but it just sniffed around Peter for a few seconds, and then it just walked away."

She wiped at the residual tears on her face as she took a deep breath. Paul was about to tell her to stop, but she shook her head, as if knowing what he wanted to say and refused the unspoken request.

"It – it stopped a few times to turn and look back at us. It seemed like forever before it left us. I could still hear it growling as it went around the corner."

She shuddered, pulling the blankets closer to her without pausing in her storytelling. "I crawled over to Peter. I could barely see him 'cause it was so dark, but I knew he was hurt and bleeding. I tried to talk to him, but he was too out of it to hear me.

"I – I looked around us. Oh, Mom, I just didn't know what else to do, but then I saw that little cave. It was way too small for the bear to get into but we could. That place stunk like nasty old skunks, but it was long and narrow, and dry. I knew it would keep the bear out, but I wasn't sure if I could get Peter inside of it."

She swallowed, again her eyes glazed over as fear flooded back into them. Paul reached down and rubbed the back of her hand. Carolyn reacted to Paul's touch and put her hand over his, holding onto him tightly.

Annie was the first to break the silence. "So, how did you get Peter into the cave, honey?"

"It wasn't easy," Peter said, his voice thick with sleep.

Everyone smiled at Peter's comment. Carolyn looked up at Paul with a pleading expression and he nodded, picking her up and carrying her over to sit on Peter's bed. "Just for a few minutes, honey, and then it's back to the chair."

Annie moved in to sit on the opposite side of the bed and Paul stood at guard behind Carolyn, just in case she got dizzy again.

"Hey, weirdo," Carolyn teased, but Paul read the emotion present in her voice and saw there was a bond between the two of them now, knowing their ordeal had galvanized their relationship into something much stronger than it had been the day before.

Peter made a face at her, and then grimaced as he moved his broken arm. When Paul glanced from Peter to Carolyn, he saw her gasp, and then hold her breath. Her face was etched with unspoken worry. Peter saw her concern and stared at her with confusion before his gaze went to the others, stunned to see everyone was so worried about him.

"Hey, I'm okay. I just moved wrong," he said, more than a little uncomfortable with the attention.

Carolyn broke the tension by leaning forward as she whispered, "Yeah, I know, you're fine. I'm fine. Everybody's fine." She spared a glance in Paul's direction, probably to see if her sarcasm had been detected by her father, before looking over at her little sister. "Kelly's here, too, but she's still asleep."

"No, I'm not. I'm awake. I've just been listening," Kelly said as she sat up suddenly and rubbed her eyes, instantly on alert, and wanting in on the conversation. She scrambled from the chair and over to Peter's bed.

"Can I sit on your bed, too, Peter?" she asked as she stood, patiently pausing for his permission.

Peter nodded as he made room for her. Annie sat behind Kelly, cradling the little one in her arms, leaving Paul to stand behind Carolyn.

Peter took a deep breath and gave Carolyn a once over. "Are you really fine? I mean, are you really okay after everything?"

The guilt in Peter's eyes as he directed his questions to Carolyn nearly broke Paul's heart, but Carolyn didn't seem to notice.

"Oh, sure, sure, I'm fine." She smiled brightly at him before folding her arms in front of her, with a mock expression of disdain. "Just don't think I'm going to do your chores because of that broken arm of yours."

Kelly leaned closer and looked at Peter's cast, deep in thought. "Does it hurt?" she asked finally.

Peter shook his head. "No, not unless I move it the wrong way."

"Can I touch it?"

Peter smiled at her. "Sure, it's just a cast."

Kelly rubbed her fingers over it. "Billy Thompson had a cast one time, and he let me write on it. Can I write my name on your cast, too?"

Peter's smile broadened. "Yeah," he replied, winking at Kelly, "Sure, you can, Squirt."

Then Peter's gaze went to where Paul was standing and the boy reacted as he took in Paul's bruised forehead for the first time. Paul felt Peter's gaze turn into pain-filled guilt as unspoken questions whisked across the boy's expression.

Somehow, Peter knew he was responsible for Paul's injury and that knowledge was tearing him up inside. Paul took a step closer to Peter, amazed at how much the boy could convey with just his expression.

"Paul, what happened? How-how did you get hurt?" Peter's already hoarse voice acquired a ragged edge as he spoke.

The boy's eyes couldn't quite meet Paul's as he impatiently waited for an answer. Paul shifted for a moment. His earlier comment to Carolyn was now haunting him, but he knew he was correct in recommending full honesty with Peter. Anything less than that could destroy the groundwork they had already laid in building a trusting relationship with Peter.

"We had a little collision, son," he paused as the halfhearted attempt at a smile failed. Peter's disbelieving frown ruled out any further levity, so he simply added, "You were having a very bad dream."

Peter stiffened in the bed as his breathing came in rapid gasps. Using honesty might have been the right course of action, but it was also a very painful one for Peter to endure. Peter's gaze lingered on Paul's bruised forehead for another moment before it darted to Carolyn, who was still pale and weak, and then to his arm in a cast.

"Yeah, but it wasn't a dream. It was one of my stupid nightmares. Geez, see what you have brought into your house when you took me from the orphanage? A kid who has nightmares every single night. Nightmares that nearly killed two people in your family."

"You mean in 'our' family, Peter," Annie corrected him. "And nobody died, honey. Don't carry guilt over things that never happened. Life isn't long enough as it is."

Peter's face contorted in grief. "Scooby died."

An awkward silence filled the room until Kelly turned back to Peter. "Scooby was a really good dog, and I hate that mean old bear for hurting him, but I'm glad the bear didn't kill you, too. Or Carolyn."

She lighted patted Peter on his plastered arm and whispered, "Thank you for saving my big sister."

Paul rubbed a hand over his mouth, hoping to hide the sudden tremble that appeared there with the child's words of comfort. He soon forgot about it as he watched the youngster stare at a swelling by Peter's eye.

"I bet it really hurt when that bear threw you into the tree," Kelly whispered in awe.

Peter flinched with the memory, but recovered quickly. "Yeah, it did, Squirt, but it wasn't anything compared to – " his voice broke off, and he was suddenly flustered.

"Compared to what?" Kelly asked.

Peter's gaze darted around the room, trying to find a spot where there wasn't a face staring back at him. He swallowed, ducking his head. "Compared to seeing that bear attack Scooby," he whispered with a voice that cracked with emotion.

Paul wasn't sure what to say to ease Peter's sorrow, but maybe there wasn't anything to be said. Kelly merely moved to lean her head against Peter's chest and wrapped her small arms around him.

Carolyn leaned forward and placed her hand on his thigh at the same time Annie rubbed his shoulder. Tears flowed down Peter's cheeks and suddenly they were a family sharing a moment of grief. Paul stepped from behind Carolyn and wrapped an arm around her shoulders as Peter wiped at his face.

Kelly turned, looking up from where her chin rested on Peter's chest. "Tell me everything that happened."

Paul could see that Peter's roiling emotions were battling with his guilt. The concern of the little girl at his side was almost too much for him to bear. Paul could almost read Peter's inner battles as if they were words written in a psychology book. In the next moment, Peter started pulling inside, withdrawing from the love flowing around him, unable to accept it any longer.

"When can I get out of here?" Peter asked, seeming to fight to hold back his tears.

Annie's head cocked towards Peter, as if trying to attune herself to his sudden change in attitude, and then she turned to Paul for direction. Paul cleared his throat, stalling as long as he could before speaking. The knot in his gut from the night before was starting to twist and tighten again.

"Well, Peter, I believe the doctor said you could be released in the morning as long as you continued to do well."

Peter nodded once. Something in that nod made Paul's gut tighten even more. Or maybe it was Peter's atypical unemotional demeanor fighting for control of his expression.

"Good. I can be packed and ready to go back to the orphanage as soon as you can drive me there, sir."

Peter's response left everyone shocked and horrified.

Paul was the first one to find his voice. "Peter, why would we – "

"Why – why would you want someone like me in your typical American family? Look at what I've done in only a few weeks! I've screwed everything up with those damned dreams! I've killed your dog and almost got your daughter killed, too! I'm not safe to be around! Can't you see that?"

Instead of reacting with anger, those around Peter radiated compassion. "You're not leaving us," Paul said simply.

"Not because of some old silly dreams, that's for sure," Carolyn chimed in.

"We love you, Peter. Last night was an accident. It's not going to happen every night," Annie added.

Kelly put her hand on Peter's arm. "I'll let you have my teddy bear to sleep with, Peter. He always gives me happy dreams. I know he can help you, too."

Peter's chin trembled as he rebelled against the love being shown to him. He shook his head. He tried to throw back his blankets and get up. Paul's heart ached for him when he didn't have the strength to stand on his own. He knew what was happening with Peter.

For so long, the boy had been without a family to love him. The kind of love that overlooked the mistakes and hardships everyone encountered. Just like the unconditional love that had been taken away from Peter so tragically with the death of his father years before.

Now, to have it presented to him when he was feeling the most vulnerable, was almost too much for Peter to bear, especially when he considered himself to be the undeniable cause for Scooby' death. Peter was struggling inside and out. He couldn't make himself get out of his bed, and yet he couldn't allow himself to accept the love his family was giving him.

Paul took a couple more steps and knelt at Peter's side, watching the tears stream down Peter's face. "You're a stubborn one, that's for sure. But you're the one we want in this family and whether you like it or not, you're stuck with us."

Peter's defenses crumpled as Paul took him in his arms. "You got that, kid? You're a part of this family now and always will be."

"Amen to that," Annie whispered softly.

Peter sobbed as he held onto Paul, but even so, Paul could feel the fight go out of the boy as his head went limp against Paul's chest. When Paul pulled back to view Peter's reddened eyes, he was surprised by a solemn expression.

"My father used to say the path of discovery begins by looking at the darkest parts of our heart in order to release the light that will show us our proper destiny in life."

Paul bit his lip as tears welled up for him suddenly. What a gem they had found in this young teen. Stubborn and wise. What an odd combination. And how fortunate they were to have him in their family.

"Your father was a very wise man. I wish I could have known him. And I'm very proud of the way he raised you to be the young man you are today."

Peter wiped at his residual tears in a sudden burst of self-consciousness. "Okay, so I'm a part of this family," he paused as a mischievous grin replaced the pained expression from moments before, "But like you said, I'm a stubborn one and I want you to remember that you were the ones who asked for this."

Paul laughed and took him into another gentle hug. Then he stood back and allowed the others to say their own words of acceptance to Peter. After all, it wasn't every day that a new member was officially inducted into the family.

oOoOoOoOo