Chapter Seven: Area Katie-One
Chris: [narrating] Last time on Total Drama Encore, we ended up in Jamaica, mon! First, the contestants had to dive for buried treasure in the lagoon filled with electric eels and sharks before moving on to the death-defying racecourse which sent our players on the ride of their life! Meanwhile, Eva's internal struggles never cease to amuse us as, while she may be tough as nails, she's apparently a big ol' chicken when it comes down to expressing her feelings. [chuckles] Additionally, it seems as though the tale of two dogs continues with Buster and Tramp still not coming to terms with each other. [in the cockpit with Chef] Will the two of them ever see eye-to-eye? Will Eva finally get the courage to confess her feelings for Ella? Will I sit back and laugh at them try and fail to accomplish those goals? Yes, yes I will, right here on Total...Drama...Encore!
[cue theme song, the episode continues]
[scene shows Team Mink in the first-class section where the females are having an argument]
Katie: What I'm saying is that you two never listen to me! Every time I try to pitch in an idea or give my take on something, you always cut me off!
Colleen: Probably because there's nothing to gain from what ya' sayin'.
Katie: Hey! That's not true, I have lots of ideas to share, I'm a member of this team, you know!
Minerva: Well, we can see that, but the truth of the matter is that you should really be leaving the thinking to us. We're the strategists and you're...the helper.
Katie: Does being the helper mean I have to also fetch you all drinks and then have them spit in my face just because "oooh, this isn't fine wine, I'm too important to drink regular juice."
Colleen: Maybe if you got your head out of the clouds, you'd realize that certain people have certain tastes.
Katie: Then why can't they just walk three feet away from their seats to grab the beverage they want instead of getting other people to do it for them? Like, I'm not Cinderella, I'm not a maid. You both have two working arms and legs, why do I need to do all the work?
Minerva: Katie, darling, I get your concern, but quite frankly, your voice is starting to irritate me, so please run along now and leave us in peace.
Katie: [scoffs] You just don't care, do you?! [storms off furiously]
[static buzzing]
Katie: ARGH, I swear, I have never been this infuriated with a group of people in my life! I don't understand why any guys would want to date those two, they are rude, nasty, stuck-up, and just look down on other people for their own selfish gain! What I wouldn't give to shove them out the door at 30,000 feet! I need to find a way to get rid of them, but with only two votes on my side, the most I could forge is a tie. I need an additional vote to make sure either Colleen or Minerva gets the boot in the next elimination ceremony. But the question is...how?
[static buzzing]
Minerva: Yeah, that Katie is really starting to annoy me. I don't understand what she wants from me, I'm the Shepard in this operation and she's the sheep. Ergo, she should be following me without any sort of questions asked. Perhaps it might be time to cut her strings.
[static buzzing]
Colleen: Pfft, that Katie, am I right? Always yammerin' in our ears about not gettin' attention or bein' listened to you. I mean, if someone's defining trait was them going "EEEEEEEEEEE" all the time, would you listen to them?
[static buzzing]
Katie: [to Loopy] Loopy, you trust me, right?
Loopy: Huh? Oh, well...yes, I suppose I do trust you, Katie.
Katie: Ah, good. I was just curious about if you were still comfortable with voting off either Colleen or Minerva the next time we lose.
Loopy: Well, I cannot say I have any objections to that.
[static buzzing]
Loopy: The main 'zing 'zat I need to be wary about is Minerva. 'Zat woman is as slippery as a snake and I have no doubt in ma' head that one way or another...she will find out about 'zis…[sighs]...it is not easy to be put in between a rock and a hard with two ladies.
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to the economy class section where Team Ultimate and Fantasy are seen sitting on opposite sides of each other]
Ella: You don't think that Chris will force us to be eliminated to the last person, will he?
Eva: If he tries anything like that, I will not hesitate to beat his ass!
Bridgette: While I would normally reprimand such violent measures, from personal experience in that sort of situation, I found it rather dumb that Team Victory got eliminated to the last person like that as if Chris was just picking on us deliberately because of the irony of our team name.
Sierra: Oh, maybe Ella and Eva won't have to be eliminated to the last person on their team! We'll probably get them as new teammates now that their team is so small!
Bridgette: That's...actually not a bad idea. It's more convenient in my opinion than eliminating a single team just for the fun of it.
Buster: Heh, who knows, we might have two couples on this team.
Tramp: Yeah, need I remind you that we are not dating nor did I agree to be in a relationship with you?
Ella: Oh, Tramp. I've heard all about what's been going on between you and Buster. It's truly a sad state of affairs.
Tramp: Wait, how did you-
Ella: Your nice teammate Sierra filled me in on all the details. Please, don't bottle up whatever is troubling you, you have my word that I will not utter a single phrase of malice or judgment on whatever is ailing you.
Tramp: [gulps] I-I assure you, I'm fine, there's nothing to tell.
Buster: Liar. It's been several days and you still won't admit to the fact that you're lying through your teeth.
Tramp: Buster, I'm telling you-
Buster: No, I'm telling you that you need to cut out this secretive bulls**t and just fess up because you cannot go on like this. You know why? Because I'm not gonna let you now SPIT IT OUT!
Tramp: I...I...I can't say...it's too personal…
Buster: You never had any problems talking to me about personal s**t in the past, what's stopping ya' now?
Tramp: That was before, Buster! Before I realized that I had the opportunity to give myself a better life, one where I wasn't sheltered by you!
Buster: Need I remind you of all the times I saved your ass from trouble?! I was always there when you needed me to be and then you just up and went off abandoning me for some chick on the streets!
Tramp: Hey, do not talk about my wife like that!
Buster: I'm gonna talk however I damn please! Face it, Tramp, you walked out on everything we stood for back in those days, so who's really the bad guy here?!
Eva: [to Tramp] He's got a point, you know. You kinda did walk out on him without a second thought it seems. That's rather scummy on your part.
Tramp: WHAT?! Are you actually believing this man?! C'mon, Ella, Bridgette, back me up here!
Bridgette: Well, I...um...think you both have a point…?
Ella: If I may add, the fact that you've been hiding something for a while now doesn't exactly paint you in a trustworthy light.
Tramp: But I-
Ella: So I'm asking you, please just let out whatever you've been hiding. The truth shall set you free.
Tramp: No, I...I can't!
Sierra: Alright, I'll say it; Tramp is actually divorced!
Bridgette: [gasps]
Ella: Oh!
Eva: [shrugs]
Buster: [raises his brows]
Tramp: [blushes] SIERRA, YOU...YOU...I...I...I need to be excused! [runs off to the confessional]
[static buzzing]
Tramp: I can't believe it...my own secret and I didn't even have the balls to tell it myself…[buries his face in his hands and begins to cry a few small tears]...why am I so weak…[hears footsteps from behind him and looks back to see…]...oh my God, I didn't lock the door?!
Buster: That's beside the point, you've actually been divorced this entire time?
Tramp: I...I was…[sighs]...a while back, me and Pidge were starting to grow rather...distant from one another...as such we...split apart and I got custody of Scamp while she got custody of Annette, Collette, and Danielle...he's currently staying with a friend while I'm here...hence why I was so hesitant to tell you or anyone else about this…[reaches into his pocket and produces a gold ring]...I've been keeping onto this ever since the divorce until I find that special someone…
Buster: Well...on one hand, I never expected the world-famous couple to break up like that...on the other hand, I always had a feeling you'd wisen up and come back to your roots...and to me…
Tramp: Now, wait a minute, just because I'm no longer with Lady doesn't mean I'm-
Buster: Tramp, look deep into yourself, when has anyone ever stood by you so closer more than I have?
Tramp: Well...I mean...well...you, I suppose…
Buster: Exactly. I admit I may have been a bit possessive of you towards the time when you left, but I was only doing it because I didn't know how else to approach myself towards you in...that manner…
Tramp: Wait, are you telling me that…
Buster: Yes…
Tramp: Hoooooo my God, I really do suck, don't I? First, I take advantage of our friendship by disregarding how it made you feel, then I throw myself into a life in which I pretty much give away my freedom to some random girl, and then I have the nerve to so callously label you when my son first met you, and now I pretty much acted like a complete ass because I was in too much denial and bitterness...for shame on myself…
Buster: Hey...it doesn't have to be...we could always, you know...start over…
Tramp: Well...I think...I think...I would like that...how do you want to go about it?
Buster: Well, you could always start off by givin' me a little sugar~
Tramp: [blushes] Oh, you cad! [chuckles sheepishly]
[at that moment, a loud bang is heard on the outside of the plane]
[scene cuts to Chris and Chef in the cockpit]
Chris: Um, are we outta gas?
Chef: Yeah, cuz you spent all our gas money!
Intercom: Attention, passengers...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
[as the plane begins to descend rapidly, the contestants are thrown into a panic]
Katie: WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!
Eva: Ella, if we don't make it, there's something I just want you to know!
Ella: Tell me, anything!
Eva: I...I…[grabs the songbird and pulls her into a rough kiss]
Ella: MMM!
Eva: [pulls away] I'm sorry if you hate me now, I just couldn't help my-
[THUMP!]
[the contestants are flung up and fall flat on the ground in their respective compartments]
Bridgette: Ooooooooh...that hurt…
Sierra: I think my stomach just did a somersault inside of itself…
Tramp: [shivers as he clings onto Buster] S-Sorry...I'm just...glad you're still alive…
Buster: Heh, same here, sweetch-[gets pulled into a kiss by Tramp who then swiftly pulls away]...hooooooooomomma, that is hawt!
Eva: [glances awkwardly at Ella] So...I guess we survived after all...hehe...I suppose I'll just go now…
Ella: Wait...about what you just did…
Eva: [freezes and looks back nervously] Y-Yeah, um, I'm sorry about...you know what and I-
Ella: Oh, I'm not mad at you, not in the slightest. In actuality, I'm quite flattered. I was wondering when my prince would come and sweep me off my feet...but I guess I never expected it to be you…
Eva: Hehe...yeah...
[scene cuts to the outside of the plane where the contestants are standing in what appears to be a deserted area]
Bridgette: Where are we? There doesn't appear to be any signs of civilization for miles.
Chris: Well, due to the fact that a certain somebody forgot how to fly, coughChefcough, we're gonna be doing the challenges in the coolest, extra-terrestrialest place in the world...Area 51!
[the contestants gasp at this]
Katie: We're going into Area 51?! Like, the Area 51?!
Chris: Correctamundo!
Loopy: Um, might I ask about 'ze condition of 'de plane?
Chris: Yeeeeeeah, about that...you see, we're outta gas, plane's busted and we're broke. But the show must go on! We can't waste any of this footage, especially the footage from earlier. [chuckles as Tramp, Buster, Ella, and Eva look away]
Colleen: Didn't you blokes budget for the whole season?
Chris: Some things cost more than expected, airplane-ready hot tubs don't grow on trees, ya' know?
Minerva: You must have an emergency fund!
Chris: Spent it on our last fuel-up.
Eva: [sarcastically] Which went so well.
Chris: Anyway, time for a little announcement before we get started on tonight's challenges. Eva, Ella, seeing as Team Fantasy is down to two members, I figured it's time for Team Fantasy to be dissolved.
[the two girls smile at each other]
Chris: And, to make things interesting, from this point on until the merge; Ella, you're on Team Ultimate and Eva, you're on Team Mink.
Ella: Oh…
Eva: UGH!
[static buzzing]
Eva: So I finally get the affections of the girl that I like and now I can't even be on the same team with her?! You'd need a new word for how much this sucks!
[static buzzing]
Ella: Well...at least we'll still be able to see each other…just not on the same teams as of current. [gives Eva a peck on the cheek and joins the members of Ultimate]
Eva: [blushes as she joins the members of Mink] Yeah…
Chris: [with a chart of the location] Listen up, space cases, the five-one is the most tightly protected military base in the world. Which is why tonight's challenge is gonna be so much fun! [chuckles as the contestants glance apprehensively at each other] For me...part one; breaking into Area 51 without getting shot, gassed, plasma-rayed, or otherwise killed. The place is guarded by elite black-ops soldiers, so if anyone does get all exploded, their timely but hilarious demise will be blamed on a freak weather balloon accident. Part two; each team must find a genuine functioning alien artifact inside Area 51's infamous black box warehouse. The place is full of broken alien junk. You need to find something alien that still works. But be careful, the warehouse is loaded with boobytraps! Part three; the winning team must bring their artifact back to the plane intact. Last team back faces elimination and do not get caught over there! Rumor has it that trespasses get a memory wipe and are transferred to an alien colony where they either become slaves or food. You have till dawn! Go!
[scene cuts to Team Ultimate running towards the base]
Buster: Alright, we should split up and look for points of entry, Tramp goes with me, ladies, you-
Sierra: STOP! Look!
[the members of Team Ultimate pause to see that they're standing several yards between the fence of Area 51]
Bridgette: Whoa…
Ella: Oh my…
Tramp: [gulps]
[scene cuts to Team Mink standing outside fence of the base]
Colleen: Ooooh, some kind of security vegetable patch.
Minerva: Katie, get your clammy hands off of my leg!
Katie: I'm not touching your leg!
[they all look down to see a large dark red lizard clinging onto Minerva's leg. They run off in a panic as the lizard chases after them until it shows up into the sky due to an explosion]
Minerva: Since when do lizards fly?!
Eva: Everyone, freeze...we are on a minefield…
Loopy: Oh ça ne va pas bien finir…
[scene cuts back to Team Ultimate]
Buster: Remember, throw the rock and run in the opposite direction. Now!
Tramp: [throws a rock and quickly runs in the opposite direction to hide behind a rock closer to the fence] Got it!
Buster: Now!
Bridgette: [throws a rock and quickly runs in the opposite direction to hide behind the same rock as Tramp] Phew, made it!
Buster: Go!
Sierra: [charges into the field with a warrior cry before she sets on a landmine and gets blown high into the air]
Ella: Where's Sierra?!
Sierra: AAAAAAAAAA-OOF! Ooooooooh...huh, wha...I'm...I'm in the base! I did it! I-[a suction tube comes out of the ground to suck up the fangirl]-uh oh...YAAAAAAAAAAAAA-[gets sucked into the tube and disappears]
Bridgette: Sierra!
Tramp: How are we gonna get her back?!
Ella: Well, there's an open part of the fence we could enter. [points to the exact spot]
Buster: Well, that's...convenient.
[scene cuts back to Team Mink]
Eva: Ugh, what are we gonna do?
Katie: Well, maybe we could-
Colleen: Not listen to you for a start.
Katie: Hey!
Eva: Does anyone have any ideas?
[Ding, Ding!]
Eva: ARGH, ANYTHING BUT THAT!
Chris: [with flying a jetpack] Okay, I'll give you a choice, what would you rather do? Sing a song or tap dance in a minefield? [dodges a few lasers] YIP! Whohoho, okay! I'm out!
[the music begins as a laser strikes one of the landmines]
Katie: Gal pal kicker!
She knew she was my friend,
But now it's time to diss her!
She treated me like a servant,
And I'm not gonna miss her now!
Eva: Gal pal kicker!
Katie: You're gonna get
What's coming to you
If it's the last thing
I ever do-oo-oo!
Katie: That's right!
That's right!
Eva and Katie: That's right!
That's right!
Katie: Let's go a little back!
We tried to nab a Ripper in a sack.
Eva: And they had a laugh attack
When they stretched you on the rack!
Katie: All those times Sadie made me smile,
They just wanted my looks
All the while!
Sierra: Duh! It was so obvious.
Eva and Katie: Gal pal kicker!
Katie: You're not my new sister!
You're a pushy, snobby, nasty blister! Oh!
Eva: Gal pal kicker!
Eva and Katie: You're gonna get what's coming to you!
Katie: If it's the last thing I ever do-oo-oo
Eva: Does anyone have anything solid to throw down?!
Katie: Oh, hold up! I have some candy in my pocket! I could use it to make a path!
Eva: Do it!
[Katie throws a piece of candy at the ground and it shows where the landmine is, she repeats this process until Team Mink has a clear straight path to the base]
Loopy: Bien joué, you have saved us!
Katie: Just doing my part on the team!
[scene cuts to the inside of the base as a couple of soldiers exit out of the building. The door is about to slam shut when Eva props it open and leads her team into the building]
Colleen: Yes, we beat Team Ultimate into this place!
Buster: [bursts open the door before it closes and allows his team to enter] Think again, collie!
Colleen: Oi!
[scene cuts to Chris watching through the TV in his private cabin]
Chris: Will our amateur alien hunters make it out of the mysterious black box with their butts intact? Where on Earth is Sierra? Will Chef fix the plane so we can leave here while I'm still young? Find out when we return on Total...Drama...Encore...hey, where's my musical accompaniment? [gets a radio thrown at his face by a smug-looking Chef Hatchet]
[scene cuts to black, the episode continues]
Bridgette: Ooooooh, where could they have taken Sierra?
Intercom: Welcome to the Black Box Warehouse! Finding a functioning alien artifact in here is gonna be like a bit like finding a needle in a haystack, a haystack with a black-op security system, which I set off when I hacked into this P.A.! Ma' bad!
[a siren sounds off and the contestants run off in a panic]
[scene cuts to Katie hiding from some black-ops running past a crate when Colleen chucks a piece of equipment at her head. The collie picks up a disc and shakes it about, but nothing happens]
Colleen: Ugh, junk! [tosses the disc when it suddenly comes to life, hovers up in the air and flies away] ARGH, can't these boxes have labels?!
[scene cuts to Katie lightly kicking a robot when it comes to life]
Robot: Intruder alert. Initializing elimination procedure. [produces a giant laser about to zap Katie when it falls through the floor] Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.
[scene cuts to Eva examining what appears to be a portal. She sticks her finger in it, which causes half of her body to be sucked into it]
Katie: Eva! Hold on, I've got you! [pulls the weight lifter with all her might out of the portal]
Eva: Ugh, space snot! But...thanks for that.
Katie: No problem. Say, I've got something to offer; an alliance between you, me, and Loopy to take down Colleen and Minerva.
Eva: Eh, I'm down for that. I never liked the look of those two anyway. I've seen their schtick [static buzzing]
Katie: This is perfect! With three votes on my side, there's no way I can be voted out in case we lose. Colleen and Minerva are toast!
[static buzzing]
Eva: Well, at least this thing is int-[a piece of equipment is thrown at the portal from behind, causing it to fall and break]-DAMN IT!
[scene cuts to Sierra waking up and then finding herself tied down to a rack]
Sierra: Huh?! W...Where am I?! [gasps] I'm about to be probed and have my memories erased! [begins to sob before she begins to strain against the restraints] No...not...this...TIME! RRRRRAAAAAAAAHHHH! [breaks free of the restraints and busts down the door] You hear me, Area 51?! It's gonna take a lot more than that to get the better of me! [looks up and sees a white box atop the room she came out of, gasping for joy] I've got it! [grabs the box when it suddenly sparks up and out appears two aliens] Oooooooh, little creepy aliens, come to Sierra! [jumps up and tries to grab the struggling aliens, but they manage to escape] Well, at least I got the box.
[the runaway aliens suddenly finds itself in Eva's hands]
Eva: Don't even think about putting up a fight, I am your superior! [brutally stuffs the aliens into a cardboard box] C'mon, let's go!
[scene cuts to the two teams running back to the plane]
Colleen: Oi, put the pedal to the metal, why don't you, Eva?!
Eva: I'm going as fast as I can!
Bridgette: They're catching up!
Sierra: Not if I have anything to say about it!
Chris: And the winner is…
[scene cuts to Sierra and Eva running neck and neck with each other]
Chris: Team Ultimate!
[the members of Team Ultimate cheer for their victory as the members of Team Mink groan]
[static buzzing]
Eva: I lost to a fangirl...a fangirl! ARGH!
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to Loopy in the economy class section when Minerva approaches him]
Minerva: Hey there...so, given any thought about the vote?
Loopy: Well...um…
Minerva: Good because I've decreed that Katie will be the target for tonight. I'm sure you understand why.
Loopy: Um, well I-
Minerva: Don't you, Loopy?
Loopy: [clears his throat] Yes, I understand, madame…
Minerva: Alright then, see you at the elimination ceremony. [walks off leaving Loopy feeling very apprehensive at his current situation]
[scene cuts to black, at the Elimination Ceremony]
Chris: Team Mink, not a lot of teamwork goin' on tonight. But it's time to cast the votes to see who you all would like to send home.
[static buzzing]
Minerva: [smugly stamps Katie's passport with her eyes closed]
[static buzzing]
Eva: [stamps Minvera's passport]
[static buzzing]
Colleen: [rolls her eyes as she stamps Katie's passport]
[static buzzing]
Katie: [repeatedly stamps Minerva's passport out of fury until Chef pulls her out of the confessional]
[static buzzing]
Loopy: [looks at the passports and sighs]
[static buzzing]
Chris: Alright, now that the votes are in, time to see who's getting peanuts; Loopy [catches the bag]...Eva [catches the bag]...and Colleen [catches the bag]. Katie, Minerva, this is the final bag of the night. One vote for Minerva [Katie grins], one vote for Katie [Minerva smirks], another vote for Minerva [Minerva scowls], and another vote for Katie [Katie gaps]. And with one vote remaining, the final bag goes to…
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Minerva!
Minerva: Hmph. [catches the bag with a grin]
Katie: [gasps] What?! B-But how did I get more votes?!
Loopy: [looks away guiltily, but this does not go undetected by Eva]
Chris: [tosses the parachute to Katie which she catches] Katie, any final words before you take the Drop of Shame?
Katie: Yes, Minerva and Colleen, you're evil! You're just trying to-
Chris: And that's all the time we have for today! So long, Katie! [shoves her out of the plane]
Katie: [drops only a few feet to the ground as the plane is still out of gas] Oof!
Chris: [sighs] It's just not the same. A little screaming would help.
Katie: [rolls her eyes] Aaaaaaaaaaaah…
Chris: Meh, a little better.
[just then, the two aliens from earlier come out of nowhere towards Katie]
Katie: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH! [runs away from the oncoming aliens]
Chris: Much better. Will Katie manage to get rid of those aliens and will we ever get out of here? Find out next time on Total...Drama...Encore!
[scene cuts to black as the episode ends]