Chapter 29

Steve and therefore Catherine as well had a much better night than before. Steve was a bit restless from time to time, but every time it had started, Catherine had tightened her hug for a few minutes and he relaxed again. There weren't any other "real" nightmares and no waking up during the night.

That might have been one of the reasons that the atmosphere was much better than the day before when Steve asked: "What are we going to do now?"

"You mean after breakfast? Aren't you usually doing your relaxation exercises with Catherine?"

"No, I meant with me? I mean now that you know for sure that…you know…I…you've heard what the doctor had said."

"Yes, I've heard. But Catherine didn't. What had the doctor said?"

"You all know that."

"Say it Steve."

"Why?"

"Just say it. You've done nothing wrong. And we all know so you are not spilling any secrets here."

"The doctor had said that I am suffering from a severe case of PTSD."

"See wasn't so hard, was it? The reason I wanted you to say it was that there is nothing wrong with having it. You can tell us without being ashamed or feeling awkward. That is why we are here. And to answer your first question. We are doing the same as before: Stick to the therapy plan, have fun and enjoy the wonderful island of Hawaii. Why do you think we would/should change that?"

"I don't know. Maybe you want me to go to a clinic after all."

"Steve!" Catherine said a bit louder than she wanted. "We've been over this. Just because the doctor had confirmed what he had said before and what we all here had already known hasn't changed anything. It hasn't gotten worse just because he had said it out loud."

"Okay. I got it. And I just wanted to offer it – for all the reasons you already know. Because if it isn't a big deal for you, it is for me. I am sorry, but – even if I had known before – hearing it was a blow to the gut nonetheless. After all these questions…and it was just the beginning…I felt like I was diagnosed with a deadly disease. I know it isn't, but it felt that way. It drained me and then I yelled at Danny and you had to yell at me and…and that…might get worse too. I don't want to lose you two. You are all I have left." The longer he talked the more desperate he sounded. Catherine and Danny felt with him, but they couldn't let him drown in his sadness and self-pity.

"I understand that," Catherine said, "but as we said: nothing has changed. We are going to continue what we had started – end of story…I'd like to finish my book today. It is not going to be too hot today, so I thought about going to the beach, taking a swim and sitting in the sun to read afterwards. Any of you want to join me for the swim?"

"I don't swim, but our super SEAL here might join you. When you two are finished, you can read your book and Steve and I can play a round of fetch Eddie. He really likes to run in and out of the ocean, especially when it is not too hot outside."

"I am in. Steve?"

"Yeah. We can do that," he said without too much enthusiasm. "What about therapy?"

"Since we only have Jacobsen and a massage today, I think we can do that in the afternoon and as usual before bedtime. Let's have some fun at the beach."

And they had fun – a lot of it. When Steve and Catherine came back from their swim, Danny and Eddie had already started playing. Eddie was totally excited and ran into the ocean to welcome his new playmates. He looked a little dumbfounded when Catherine dried herself, sat down in one of the chairs and started reading her book, but when Danny threw the ball into Steve's direction he immediately reacted and ran after it – almost running Steve over in the process. It was a real pleasure to watch the dog and the two men. The laughter, shouting and barking expressed pure joy and fun. Catherine went back to the house to get her cell phone. When she returned, she stopped in the middle of the beach and filmed what was going on in and out of the water. After about seven minutes of filming Steve noticed her and threw the ball in her direction. Before Eddie had reached her, she had kicked the ball back and Eddie turned around again. She went to the chairs to put her cell down and then she joined the trio. They played for about another hour before Steve called it a day. Eddie would have loved to play a little longer, but he was still happy that they had played that long at all. After they had drank some iced tea, they all lay down on their towels to let themselves dry by the sun.

Fifteen minutes later Steve got up again. Eddie hoped for another game and jumped to his feet, but his master went back to the house, after he had told his two human friends that he was going to take a shower and a nap.

Catherine and Danny remained at the beach.

"Is it just me or is Steve in a good mood again after all this rampage?"

"He is. I had the same feeling. He needed that. I don't have to tell you that he loves the ocean, but he loves and needs Eddie as well. Eddie had PTSD too a few months back. But thankfully they found out his trigger very quickly. It was a smell of a flower the neighbor had planted. When she heard what had happened, she immediately removed it. A few days later Eddie acted normal again. But it was a tough time, especially since I had been involved in a car accident were a woman I've just met – but liked very, very much – had died. I couldn't help neither Steve nor Eddie and Steve tried to take care of both of us. Eddie barely wanted to get out of the house – for obvious reasons and I couldn't do much, because everything hurt after the crash and I had to make sure that the crash got properly investigated."

"I am sorry to hear that Danny. You have been through a lot too. Maybe I shouldn't have asked you to help with Steve. I should have waited till you have solved you own issues."

"No, it is fine. I was the one who agreed to your plan it wasn't like you forced me or something and I've talked to Dr. Jensen a few times during everything. It really helped me a lot. After all these years I already feel better if I just talk to him - if I get things out. No "special" therapy needed."

"That is good to hear, but it is still awful."

"Yeah it is. But at least HPD got the guy who was responsible."

"Good. But that doesn't bring that girl back."

"No, but her family got some kind of justice."

"True. Hope that they can take some comfort from it."

They sat in silence for a few minutes.

"Have you planned anything for dinner yet?" Catherine asked.

"Not exactly. I have a few ideas, but nothing planned. Why?"

"I hope all this didn't just changed his mood, but quickened his appetite as well. I thought about grilling some steaks."

"Yeah, I'd like that. But I as far as I know there is nothing in the fridge. And it is too late to defrost."

"No problem. I can drive to Richard's."

"If you don't mind…"

"No, it's fine. I just take a shower and then I'll go."

Half an hour after Catherine had left Danny went back to the house to prepare a salad and the dishes. When he entered the kitchen, Steve was standing at the fridge and looking inside.

"Hey," Danny said. What are you doing?"

"Looking for something to eat. I am starving."

"Good to know. Do you think you can hold on for a while longer? Catherine is on her way to Richard's. We thought about grilling some steaks. I was just about to take a shower and then prepare a salad."

"You go take a shower. I'll make the salad. When did she leave? I can start the grill too."

"Just wait a few more minutes. She wanted to text me when she is on her way back."

When Danny got out of the shower, he already had a text from Catherine. He dried himself and put some clothes on before he went into the kitchen. The salad was already prepared and sitting in a big bowl on the sideboard. There was no sign of Steve though. Danny went out and saw him lying on the grass cuddling Eddie.

"Hey, Catherine is on her way. She will be here in about fifteen minutes, I guess. You still want to do the grilling or should I?"

"No, I can do that. No problem."

Catherine had brought a few more steaks to restock their supplies and even brought an extra piece of meat and a bone for Eddie.

Unlike yesterday Steve felt comfortable with his friends today. He was really hungry and ate a great portion. His mood contributed to a nice evening where everyone could unwound.

"So, when is Charlie coming?"

"Tomorrow."

"Yeah, I know. I meant at which time of day?"

"I'll pick him up after school – so we will be here around 2 pm. You want to join me? I think he would love to see you. It's been awhile."

"Yeah, I know. But I don't think so. Do you have anything planned?"

"Not exactly. But I am sure he wants to play with Eddie and he wants to spend some time with you too. You know how much he loves the ocean. Don't know where he got that from. Other than that, nothing special – yet. Maybe he wants to play with his new ball. Hope you can play soccer."

"I can," Catherine said.

"What?" both men asked in unison.

"I can," she repeated. "I used to play a lot. But it's been a few years since I did that. But I also think I can "relearn". If he wants to play with me, I think we'll have some fun."

"Yeah, great. He's gonna love that. And, Steve, why don't you want to come with me to pick him up?"

"Because it is Friday and that means we two "need" to talk. And since Charlie is here in the afternoon, I think we should do that forenoon. And I think I will need some rest after that. I don't want to be all tired out when he is here."

"Okay, I totally understand that."

"Speaking of tired. It was a great day, I have to thank you both, but I think I am going to bed now. We have a packed day tomorrow."

"How about the massage?"

"If it is okay for you at this time of day, we can do that. Not sure if I can stay awake that long though."

"No problem. Wouldn't be the first time you fall asleep on that."

Of course, he didn't make it that far. He fell asleep shortly after Catherine had started with the real massage. She didn't mind and finished it anyway. His muscles were still tense, but she noticed some progress nonetheless. When the twenty minutes of recovery were over, Catherine removed the thin sheet that was covering him and put his real blanket over him to keep him warm. After that she crawled into bed as well, lay herself as close to him as possible – just because she needed it - and put her hand on his hip hoping that the contact would reassure him that he was save and not alone.