He doesn't say anything for a lengthy moment. She looks beautiful. How could she be anything but that. She's wearing that green dress he's been daydreaming about seeing her in fro the most part of the day and as predicted her eyes look greener. They're sparkling and his hands twitch at his sides. He wants to grab her, pull her to him. Feel her slight body that's wrapped in silk. He tells her so. Not the later, just the beautiful part.

She bats her hand dismissively but he knows that smile. His smile. She's not given him that smile in a long time. He's sure by that smile that she's put this dress on for him and hope flowers in his stomach like it always does. But this is what she does. She lets herself get closer. Lets herself get as close to the edge as possible. The cliff edge that he's forever prepared to jump off of. But then she'll reel back as he's plummeting down. He knows she will. She'll never quite cross that line. She's married. But it's moments like these that he wonders if maybe one day she'll be his again. That he's sure she still feels it. How can she not? How can she deny it? Deny what's between them. It's magnetic.

She's nervous before they go on.

He's not. Not in the same way she is. He's never been nervous when it comes to the music. He trusts the songs and if he doesn't then they don't get played. It's as simple as that. He's especially not nervous when it comes to this album. When it comes to doing this with her. He's just excited.

He knows she's not just worrying about their performance though. She's worrying about the label. About the ramifications of tonight. This isn't the same for her as it it is him. It's not just about the music. Tonight has to have a good end game for her business. For her family and colleagues.

'It'll be alright Peyt' He squeezes her hand. 'I promise. And you know what we need to do if the crowd needs any persuasion'

'We're not doing Muffled Silence Luke. We've been through that. Don't you dare put me in that position on stage' She stares at him. Her eyes tell him she's serious.

'I won't, I won't. I'm just saying. Of course that would totally be your call' He relents. He wonders if she'd murder him alive were he to start playing the song in question that she's seemingly terrified of. That in itself makes him sort of smug. Because surely it only emphasises how weak she is to it. How much it means to her. Still. After all this time.

The second they're on stage it hits them both. The heat of the lights. The deafening sound of the crowd. That electric feeling pumping through them. They're sky rocketed back to the first time they did this. She'd been his then. He never wants to leave this stage. Because he believes she is his here, now, in this moment. For the first time in a long time he's able to pretend that she's still his.

It's ruined though as they finish they're first number and the crowd erupts. It's all ruined for him the second he registers her husband watching from the VIP area. For a stupid moment he'd really been under the illusion that he might just have her to himself. Just for tonight. He concentrates on letting his fingers strum at his guitar, concentrates on the music and not the jealousy stewing in his belly. He realises in that moment that he's not been thinking straight today. He's not been thinking like this is closure at all. Not like it's the beginning of the end. Not like he's letting go as he'd claimed to both Whitey and Nathan.

No. He's been thinking about the possibility of having her back instead. Had become convinced it wasn't as bag shit crazy as he always reminds himself.

Unlike Lucas, she doesn't notice her family's presence. Not for the first couple of songs.

He watches her send a little wave to them when she finally sees what keeps garnering his attention off stage. He hates the smile that follows. It's not the smile she gives her beaming children. It's the smile she gives her husband. He fucking hates it because he's not on the receiving end of it and he remembers. Remembers that he didn't come here to win her back. She's not his off this stage nor on it.

•••

'You were amazing Babe'

'Jake' She smiles. She'd been more than a little surprised by his presence. Is still surprised. He's not surprised her in a good while. She doesn't find herself excited or thrilled by his surprise though. Of course she's pleased. She's pleased to see the children and him she just...she doesn't know...wanted to be alone? Wanted this to be just hers? Wanted to get lost in the music, in Lucas in a way she never could with her husband and girls present. 'What're you doing here?'

'It's my girl's opening night. Did you really think I wasn't going to be here?' He's a little disappointed that she clearly thought he'd not rock up.

'I just...Jenny and-'

'Have I ever missed your first tour date?'

'No' Her voice is small. He's right. He hasn't but this is different. 'I just, I know you're not exactly thrilled about this'

'No' He smiles. 'But I've been acting like an insecure teenager. You're right. You're always right. I'm sorry if I've made this harder on you that it needed to be'

'You haven't. You're not. I get it'

'Yeah?' He smiles. She's always so forgiving. He tells himself it's cause she's in love with him because Peyton Wolf is a hard person to earn forgiveness from usually. He's watched her hold onto grudges for years. Watched her try to let go of old demons and fail time and time again. Not with him though. Because she loves him... Or is it guilt? 'Well how about you get over here and kiss me to help relieve my insecurities'

She rolls her eyes. 'Why don't you get over here and kiss me if that's what you want' She kinks her brow and he smirks at her.

'You always have to call the shots don't you?' He stalks over to her.

'Nope I just don't follow orders honey. You know that'

'I wasn't ordering. I was asking. You're the one that likes dishing out orders'

She sniggers. 'Someone has to take charge otherwise nothing would ever happen babe'

'I can take charge you know. I got me and the girls here without your assistance didn't I?'

'Brooke didn't book it all for you then?'

He pouts then. 'It was my idea'

She laughs and shakes her head. She'd once found his inability to use his initiative sort of cute. It's not so cute anymore.

'Fine. I can take charge when it matters' He corrects, his hand firmly sweeping down her side. Her amusement fades. She wants to ask if he thinks him taking charge from time to time when it comes to sex is all that matters? Wonders if he thinks his ability to assert what he wants in the bedroom is what makes him a man. Don't get her wrong. It is attractive to her but she thinks she'd be majorly turned on if he managed to book a flight and get her kids across America to be by her side all by himself without any assistance.

'The girls will come bursting in in a minute. Don't start something you can't finish babe' She pecks his lips and tries to move past him but he holds steady.

'I'll have my proper kiss first thank you' He informs her before reuniting their lips. She reciprocates like always. Endeavours to be what he wants. What she should want too. The annoying voices in her head that she usually manages to muffle out are louder today. They urge her to evade his touch. Urge her to slip free. 'The girls babe' She smiles a smile he doesn't buy. It's not seductive or sweet. It's guilty. It's a smile that has his stomach in knots. It's a smile that fuels all his insecurities, not banishes them as he so badly wants her to.

The girls do rush through the door a moment later as predicted and save an argument. An argument that they've had one too many times. An argument that is on the constant back burner. An argument that is never resolved. Will never be resolved.

He watches her with Sawyer and India. Watches her squeal with them and laugh. Wonders why she looks ten times happier to see them. When Indie declares she needs the bathroom he's more than eager to concentrate on his role as father and lead her out of her mother's dressing room, thankful for the breather because suddenly being so close to his wife is unbearable. He has these moments. Moments where being beside her is too much because sometimes he's not convinced he knows her at all and that scares the shit out of him.

She's not oblivious. She knows he's upset. Knows he's embarked on his cycle of self doubt. She knows she just failed in reassuring him and yet she can't find it in herself to care right now. She's still got adrenaline pumping through her body. She's still on a high from their opening show and she just wants to ride it out and enjoy it before she thumps back down. It's a little hard to do though because reality is right here in the form of her daughter. There's no hiding from it.

'What's that look for babe?' Peyton enquires as she wipes the make up from her face, catching her daughter's stare in the mirror before her.

Sawyer blinks at her mother. 'Nothing you just...'

'What?'

'You were really great tonight Mum'

A smile slowly creeps onto the blonde's face and she twists around on her stool to face her daughter. 'Yeah?'

'Uhuh' Sawyer confirms. 'You kinda blew my mind'

Peyton's brow kinks then. 'Babe you've seen me on stage a thousand times'

'I know. You're always great but you, you were different tonight' She notes. She doesn't know what it was but her mother's performance was heightened somehow. She doesn't know if it's just her stupid mixed up feelings regarding the man that had shared the stage with her mother. Of the secret she now knows. But her heart had pounded in her chest. The music hand tingled through her body. The hairs on the back of her neck had stood on end.

'I guess you've not really heard this album much'

'I've been listening to it a lot lately actually'

Peyton's smile slowly dwindles, her eyes filling with curiosity at Sawyer's confession. 'Yeah?...Luke mentioned that you text him this morning actually. Wanting him to show you a few things'

'Uhuh' Sawyer confirms and takes a little step forward, finding a sudden interest in her mother's jewellery.

'Did you go through my phone?'

'I just wanted his number'

Peyton's hand laces over her daughter's then and stops her fiddling with the glistening crystals. 'That's not okay Babe. I don't go through your stuff without asking'

Sawyer snorts then. 'I wouldn't put it past you'

'Well I don't! Sure I might if I really felt your life was in danger but I'd never do that unless I had reason to'

'I had reason to. I wanted his number'

'And you could've asked me for it'

'And you'd have given it me?' Sawyer fires back.

'Of course I would'

'No you wouldn't!'

'Why do you say that?'

'Because you already told him I can't have lessons with him didn't you? He text me and said he couldn't!'

Peyton sighs then. 'Babe your Dad wouldn't like it okay? Your Dad can give you lessons' She reasons.

'He hates Luke. He hates this album. He won't show me the things I want help with. Why can you work with Luke but not me?'

Peyton's brow furrows. 'Babe he's working with me on this because we made this album together and it was Julian's idea. Otherwise this wouldn't be happening right now-'

'Because Daddy doesn't trust you'

'Excuse me?'

'Does Dad know how much you text Luke?'

Peyton wants to grapple for her phone then. Wants to rifle through the exchanged messages and see what her daughter's eyes have seen despite knowing there's nothing incriminating on there. How could there be when she's done nothing wrong? 'We're friends Sawyer. We've been friends for a long time'

'Does he know?'

'What?'

'Does he know about me?'

'Babe what're you talking about?' Peyton questions exasperatedly.

'Does Luke know I'm his? Does Dad know he's not my Dad?'

Her high is well and truly over in that moment. She comes crashing back down to earth with an almighty thump. Her eyes widen then. She's imagined telling her child this over and over. She's imagined every scenario. She thought she'd imagined every scenario because this most certainly hadn't ever been something she'd envisioned happening. How could it be? How could the thirteen year old possibly know? How was she the one bringing this up? How?

'I found my birth certificate' Sawyer fills the silence and answers her mother's unsaid question.

'Sawyer' Peyton whispers.

'Did he not want me?! Is that why you split up?!'

Peyton swallows thickly. There's a lump in the back of her throat. Tears in her eyes. She blinks furiously.

'That's so not it babe' She shakes her head. 'Luke...He, he doesn't know'

The emotions are too much for a thirteen year old. She's both relieved and angry by this revelation. She's smart. She's spent weeks wondering whether her parentage was known to all involved. She's thankful that someone can be innocent in this situation. Lucas isn't at fault. Lucas is in the dark. Her real father isn't to blame.

'What about Daddy?'

'Jake knows' Peyton nods shakily. '...You have to understand babe Luke, he wasn't...he...'

'He was in rehab. He wasn't well' She summarises. She's figured out the timeline. Has spent time piecing together her parents past without directly asking them.

'Right. He couldn't bring you up. He, what we did was for you. I love you so much-'

'Did you love Luke?'

'So much. God so much' Peyton confesses.

'You could've told me! You should've told me! You still could've married Jake if that's what you wanted! It didn't need to be a secret! Why am I secret?!'

'Because you were happy! You were happy and I didn't want to ruin that...I know you must be confused and angry-'

'You took away his decision to be my Dad- if he sucked at it that would've been on him Mum! You didn't even let him try and you won't let me spend time with him now! You don't get to make that decision! Just because you didn't want to be with him! Just because you don't want him anymore doesn't give you the right to say I don't get him either!'

'That's not what I did! God Sawyer that's so not what was behind what we did!' Peyton snaps. This whole situation has been black and white to her for so long. She's not been able to see anyone interpreting her choices as selfishness when it was selflessness and selflessness alone that was at the root of her decision. She'd given up what she wanted. She'd given it all up for Lucas. Given it up to ensure his health. Given it up for the daughter before her. To protect her from the same god awful upbringing that she'd had. She'd surrendered it all regardless of her aching heart. Had kept to Jake's demands to ensure he didn't get hurt. 'You're hurting and I'll forever be sorry for that but this is grown up stuff. Luke was so unwell. I wanted stability for you. I didn't want you having someone let you down every five seconds. I didn't want you to go through what I did. I needed you to be safe. I'd do anything for you baby. It's my job to protect you'

'How is keeping me from my Dad protecting me? You're protecting yourself not me!'

'No Sawyer-'

'Yes! You are. Whatever your problems are you don't get to put them on me! I'm going to have lessons with Luke and if you won't let me I'll tell him the truth!'