"Honey" The older woman beams, wipes her hands on her pants as she gets to her feet.

"The garden looks beautiful as always" Peyton murmurs as two warm arms find their way around her.

"Not as beautiful as my favourite flower"

Peyton laughs into her shoulder. "Nonsense. I can't compete with your award winning roses Anna"

Anna smiles and draws back from their lingering embrace, her soiled hands unable to keep away; her fingers find Peyton's face and cup her cheeks. "I missed you sweetie"

"I miss you. As much as I love this place I do wish you were closer"

"I'm working on it" Anna winks.

'Wait, what?"

"Larry's contract will be up soon, I've been wanting to move back to Tree Hill for a good while now"

"Really?" Peyton's eyes glaze over in all of an instant at the prospect of having them so near again.

"Oh honey don't cry"

"It's happy tears. I'd so love it if you came back home"

"Come sit" She tugs her over to a bench.

"It's my fault you left in the first place-"

"Let's not have that conversation for the umpteenth time. Not your fault. End of"

Peyton's eyes narrow but she bites her tongue and stops herself from rehashing the past "...Is Larry at work?"

"He'll be back in a bit so I get you all to myself for a while" Anna smiles wickedly before becoming more serious. "You didn't tell me you were coming today"

"It wasn't exactly planned"

"Has something happened?" Peyton shakes her head unconvincingly. "You look tired honey. Is it Jenny? Has something else happened? Are Sawyer and Indie ok?"

"Everyone is fine. Jenny is getting there. I just needed..." Her shoulders shrug. She's not sure what she needs. She'd just got in the car and driven and then the next thing she knew she was here and then she's crying.

"Oh sweetie" Anna takes her back in her arms. "Tell me everything" She coos.

"I...I kissed Luke" It comes out with a shaky sob. '...and J-Jake knows a-and..." Anna's hand that's been making soothing circles on her back slows. "...I don't know what I'm d-doing"

"Luke as in Lucas Scott" Anna hums quietly, it's not really a question. She knows the answer.

"...yes" Peyton wipes at her face and looks up at the older woman she's adored since she could walk. The nanny that had been employed by her parents. The nanny that had begged Ellie and Mick Wolf for custody of a then 8 year old Peyton. A conversation that had been instigated when said child had rung up the Sawyers in the middle of the night, terrified because she was home alone. The nanny that had been fired when Peyton was eleven because both Anna and Larry had tired of the Wolf's parenting or lack there of and had taken her to their own home. The nanny that her parents had had an order placed upon not to come within contact of Peyton Wolf or the Wolf property. A restraining order that Peyton had begged her parents to take back, that had been ignored. An order that had resulted in the Sawyers moving in fear of getting into further trouble with the law.

"Oh honey"

"Sawyer is his!" Now she's started she can't stop. Untold secrets she's tried her hardest to keep buried spout free. "Sawyer is his and she knows and I-I"

Anna's eyes widen because she liked to think she knew the girl before her better than most, better than herself at times. She was the daughter she'd never had, the child she'd so desperately wanted to care for in ways she'd never been permitted. She often wondered how different things would've been if they'd been granted custody. "...but Jake" is all Anna can mumble.

"Jake knows! Jake has always known. I'm horrible, I'm a h-horrible, awful person"

"Shhh" Anna's hand resumes it's soothing motions. "You're not an awful person"

"No? Jenny is in re-rehab a-and I d-didn't even kn-know she was st-struggling! I should've known and I-I I've not seen her since cause I-c-can't- I j-just c-can't! Sawyer f-found out th-that Luke is h-her Dad and she h-hates me, she, she's confused! Jake's mad at me! Luke is mad at me!"

"Lucas knows?"

"No, no..." She gasps for breath.

"...why didn't you tell me all this at the time sweetie?" She blinks, is trying to digest all this news. Just twenty minutes ago she'd been tending her flowers. Sipping on tea. She's more than overwhelmed by Peyton's abrupt visit and chaotic confession.

"...I guess I...I didn't want you to be disappointed in me"

"How could I ever be disappointed in you? I know how much you loved that boy...it was always a big surprise to me and Larry when you told us you were marrying Jake...but I was grateful after what happened with Keith, so grateful because after you showed up here in the state you were in after that time he...I was so worried about the path you were going down and I know, I know in my heart it's as you say it was, he didn't strike you maliciously but a black eye is a black eye... " Peyton sniffles. "I met him before it all became such a mess. He was a good boy and he's turned into a good man. He had some problems and he got help"

Peyton nods, her bottom lip wobbling. "...The night I found out I was pregnant I fell down a flight of stairs" She whispers. Pandora's box is open. It's darkest secrets unleashed. "I told you I broke my arm horse riding" The creases on Anna's forehead deepen. "...you were so angry when I turned up here that day with a black eye, I didn't want you to hate him even more. He didn't mean too. He didn't, I was trying to get a bottle of whisky off of him and we were playing tug of war and one moment I was standing and the next..."

Anna gulps. "Sweetheart"

"...when the doctor told me I was pregnant I...I didn't want that life for her" Her nostrils flare. "I thought I'd just get an abortion cause leaving Luke wasn't a-an option" She shakes her head because even saying that out loud makes her feel sick. "I went, I went to do it but, but when it came to it I couldn't do it...she was my baby. I was going to tell him. I really was, but Jake he, he was there all the time and..." she claws her hand through her hair. "I could've lost her and because of Luke. After months of feeling like I couldn't breathe, like everything was falling apart..."

"Jake looked after you"

"He's so good. He's always been so good he, he reminds me of Larry and I, I love him I do, he...it was him that suggested it and I, I knew he'd be a good Dad and, and Luke couldn't he couldn't back then..." Anna is silent for a long minute. "You think I'm awful-"

"No. No" Anna firmly cuts off. "I think you were in a situation that anyone would find hard. I think you were young. I think at that point you'd dealt with more than any adult should, let alone a child. You witnessed your Mumma and Daddy do far too many awful things...I wish you'd told me so I could've helped you"

Peyton nods. She wishes that too. "...you-you would've made m-me do the ri-right th-thing"

"...and what's that?" Anna murmurs.

"...you would've made me tell Luke...now it's all too messy" She whispers.

Anna hesitates. "...he has a right to know sweetheart" She hums. "You can't expect Sawyer to keep this to herself. It's her truth"

"...I know"

"It's never too late to make things right...you're right, I would've tried to convince you to be honest with him back then. But I would've been resolutely against you staying with him. He's at fault here too. Pushing you down a flight of stairs, drunk or not" Anna shudders.

"He didn't push me. It was just an accident"

"It makes my heart ache all the times I've failed to protect you"

Peyton snorts then. "Are you kidding?! You and Larry are the only two people in this world that have protected me. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you"

"Oh yes you would, your strength comes from within Peyton Wolf and it astounds me how you've done all the things you have. I'll forever be proud of you"

"You always make me feel better"

"Well that's good because you're stuck with us...do you still love him? Lucas?" She pushes her tongue to the roof of her mouth "I've only been with Larry but I've had enough friends and been around long enough to know that love comes in all shapes and forms but when you've experienced that all encompassing kind of love it, it's something else entirely. I found it young and I thank the heavens everyday that my path was so easy in that sense...your path hasn't been so straight forward but I think you experienced that all encompassing kind of love just as young as I did...huh?"

Peyton's nostrils flare. "...I didn't want her to have the same life as me. Watching them fighting and-"

"I know"

"I wanted to give her a life that you and Larry wanted to give me. Why did he have to drink?! Why wasn't I enough?! I couldn't do it! I couldn't, I don't know how many hotel rooms I've walked into wondering if that day was the day I was gonna find him dead! I didn't recognise him anymore. I swore I'd never be with someone like my Dad and it felt like over night I was in a relationship with a carbon copy!" Her tears are relentless. "Every-every time I-I tried to h-help h-he got worse! And th-then with-without me he g-got b-better"

"For you honey. He got better for you...maybe your time wasn't back then but that doesn't mean your time can't be someday...you've put your children before you for a long time. You can't do that forever" She coos. "Lucas has turned everything around and that is down to you. You paid for every stint in rehab. You never gave up on him...did Jake find out about this kiss or did you tell him?"

"I...I told him"

"And what did he have to say?"

"He says I can't see Luke anymore"

"And what did you have to say about that?"

"I...I agreed. I'm married to Jake. It's the right thing"

"The right thing isn't always the easiest thing. The right thing is often the more difficult in my experience. Leaving you was the most difficult thing we've ever done but it meant I could continue to see you. It meant that when you were old enough to make your own decisions you could. I had to have faith that when you turned 18 you'd still want to see us and would find a way back to us. You dd"

Peyton frowns. Blinks "...the second I tell Luke about Sawyer he won't want anything to do with me ever again. I know him and what if it pushes him to drink?! I'd never live with myself if-'

'If he drinks that's his decision. His. Not yours. Darling he's let you down a million times but...I see that heart of yours and I don't think it ever really left him. You don't know that he's going to let you down again"

"...I couldn't handle it if he did" she whispers. "I couldn't handle it if he broke the girls hearts as well as mine"

"You can't protect them forever. But you can always be there for them"

"...I can't leave Jake, not after everything he's done-"

"Forgive me if I sound disrespectful but it was never his place to convince you he was a better man to bring up Sawyer. I know that was ultimately your choice but something tells me he played a big part in that"

"You love Jake" Peyton's glassy eyes search the older woman's face.

"...of course I like Jake, but darling there's a lot I've been in the dark about over here. This" Anna's hand finds Peyton's chest. "This heart is what I'm most concerned about right now...do you really think you can keep to that agreement sweetie? To not see Luke? Because I know your stubborn but..."

Peyton's bottom lip wobbles. "...I don't think Luke is gonna want to see me again anyway"

Anna snorts. "Well I know that's not true"

"...he said I've never let him move on and god I, I...I want him to be happy, if, if not seeing me is what he needs, then, then it's best for him and for me"

"...is it? Or is it just another way for you to both hide from your feelings?"

•••

"Hey Luke" She's grinning widely as she skips up the last step onto his porch. She's excited.

He puts the book down that he'd been pretending to read for the last half an hour down and looks at the teenager in confusion. Confused is the only word for it. "Sawyer, hey-"

"Guitar lesson" She wavers her instrument in the air triumphantly as a reminder because she's come to the conclusion that he's forgotten. She swallows her disappointment.

Lucas frowns. "Er..." His mouth can't seem to summon words and the sight of Jake waltzing up his front yard has him stiffening.

"Go on inside Sawyer. Me and Luke need to have a word quick before your lesson" Jake's voice is lower than normal. His stare hard.

Sawyer's rounded eyes skitter between the two men, her own frown working it's way onto her face as Jake ushers her through the door.

Lucas sighs as the door clicks shut. "...You know then I take it?" He knows by the sickened expression on the man before him. Knows, because there's no way in hell that Jake would be stood on his porch right now otherwise. "Look Jake I...I really am sorry but this, this isn't just on me!"

"No?! Why can't you just accept that she's not yours anymore!" Lucas frowns at that. Stands because he doesn't like the way he's being loomed over "Just stay the fuck away from her"

"You know you don't own her right?! She's the one that finds it impossible to stay away from me!" He can't help himself. This man turns him into this. Always has always will. He can't be a grown up.

"You're out of the label. She's not going to see you anymore. There's no more of this 'just friends' bullshit"

He sniggers. "You know Peyton never likes being told what to do Jakey"

"It was her fucking proposal actually" Jake scathingly retorts. Lucas's jaw tenses. "So you can expect a call from Julian shortly I'm sure, two more shows. That's it. And if I find you've tried anything with her so help me..."

He knows Jake is telling the truth in that moment. He'd foolishly thought that her mumbled words about ending the tour wouldn't actually result in that. Peyton said a lot of things after all. "...I actually think that's for the best" He sighs eventually. Jake's brow raises, surprised by the defeated expression on his rivals face. "Why have you bought Sawyer here for a fucking guitar lesson if you both want me out of your lives right now? I think it's best you find her another teacher-"

"She wants you"

"Yeah well I, I'm sorry about that but I...like you say. I need to stay away and giving the girl I love's kid tuition isn't ideal"

Jake grits his teeth together because despite not being blind to Lucas's affections for his wife he's never heard him say out loud. He wonders if he told her that. Wonders if that's what had her making out with him. He redirects his thoughts because he's on a dangerous road that leads to his fist colliding with the man before him and his kid is inside and if she's anything like her mother she's probably peering through a window somewhere. "Don't take this out on Sawyer" He hisses quietly.

"I'm not" Lucas scowls. "I thought you'd be over the moon. I'm sure you've been talked into this little fucking arrangement of having your kid come here anyway"

"Sawyer is at an age where she can make her own decisions. If you were a parent you'd understand that. No I don't like it but she wants lessons and she wants them with you" He shrugs. "So she's going to have them with you"

Lucas stares at him hard. "...You're a better man than me Jake"

"Oh, I fucking know that!" He laughs. "I'll pick her up in an hour" He's already walking away.

Lucas opens and closes his mouth. "Today- I'll give her a lesson today but you're gonna have to find someone else!"

•••

"What was that about?" Sawyer wonders.

"Oh nothing"

"It didn't sound like nothing"

"Were you eavesdropping?"

"As much as I could" She shrugs.

Lucas smirks amusedly. "You're so your mother's kid...Your Dad hates me. I'm sure that isn't news to you huh?"

"...Did something...happen?...Between you and Mum?"

"Huh?"

"I'm not stupid. The tour ends abruptly. The tour Mum has been acting like nothing could get in the way of because the label depends on it. Dad's suddenly pissed"

Lucas sighs. The kid wasn't stupid. "Honestly?" The last thing he's about to be is honest but he can give her some version of the truth. "We can't work together" He admits. "It's just too hard. I know you know that we were together back when we were kids, our friendship has always been a little rocky. Working together isn't good for either of us. We don't see eye to eye about a lot of things"

"You always seem to get on"

"Of course we do in front of you. When alone it's a little harder to keep up the act. We've said one too many horrible things to each other to move on from. You'll get it when you're older"

"What'll happen to the label though?"

"Your Mum is smart and she's got the best team around her. She'll figure it out with Julian"

"Why is Dad so mad at you?"

He laughs then. "Sweetheart I had a relationship with his wife. Of course he's gonna hate me...he's a better man than I'll ever be though"

"Why?"

"...I don't think I'd let my kid have lessons with a man I hate, even if it was what she wanted"

"He didn't want me to. I know Mum convinced him"

"He agreed though didn't he?...what's so appealing about having lessons with me anyway? I'm sure your Mumma could hook you up with anyone"

"You're the best"

He laughs. "Kid, you should think your Dad is the best"

"I do" she nods. "I do...' She blinks. Averts her eyes to the guitar on her lap. "You don't want to give me lessons anymore- I did make out that bit" She mutters.

Lucas purses his lips together for a moment. "...I"m sorry you heard that bit kiddo, I just...the truth is, I just don't want you stuck in the middle of any crap- that's not fair on you"

"I'm not my Mum"

"No, but you sure as hell look like her"

"So you don't want to see me cause I look like her?" She's scowling now. "If I could change anything about myself it would be that I look like her!"

Lucas's brow shoots up with her almost aggressive declaration. "...that's absurd- have you seen your mother?" Sawyer's arms cross tightly over herself. "She's so damn beautiful-"

"Exactly! I have to be compared to the most beautiful girl in the whole world for the rest of my life!"

"No one is comparing you to her-"

"No?! You don't want to give me lessons because I look like her! I'm not her! I'm nothing like her!"

Lucas closes his eyes. He's overwhelmed because her voice is shrill and intense and he's upset her and he doesn't know how the hell to handle her. "I'm sorry...I, you're...I just..." He sinks back into his chair, looks at her through squinting eyes. Stops himself from confiding things that he really shouldn't "...I'll give you lessons, ok? If you still want me to I'll give you lessons"

She's squinting right back at him. "...You swear?"

"I just said didn't I?"

She holds her hand out to be shaken. "You can't take it back"

Lucas bemusedly shakes her outstretched hand. "...I keep my promises"

"...I'm not like my Mum" She spins away and walks toward the window. The confusing feelings she's been carrying around with her are suddenly on the surface. "...whatever shitty thing she's done to you now isn't my fault"

"...you're quick to assume she's in the wrong" He notes.

"...She hasn't upset you?" She looks back over her shoulder.

"I'm not going to start talking to you about your Mum"

"We already are. Everyone thinks she oh so perfect but she's not. I hate her"

"Woah" Lucas shakes his head. "Sawyer don't say that"

"Why not? It's the truth!"

"No, no it's not"

"You don't know anything" She mumbles.

"I know your mother on a level that not many people do actually" He argues. "And she's the best Mum" Sawyer snorts. Lucas watches her carefully. "I don't know what's happened between the two of you but please believe me when I say your Mum puts you two first always"

She teeters with spurting out the truth. The truth that she's sure will have him siding with her.

"You have no idea about all the things your Mum had been through by the time she was your age" Her interest peaks suddenly. "She didn't have the doting parents that you've got-"

"I know, Grandad was wasted and her Mum upped and left...Nobody breathing down your neck doesn't sound so bad" She mumbles.

"Hey" Lucas is beside her now and his soft bark makes her jump. "No child should feel unloved-"

"Grandad does love her" The thirteen year old disputes.

"Yes. Of course he does but he put having a drink before her one too many times"

"Is that what you did?" The question escapes her lips. It catches him of guard because they weren't talking about him. "...sorry I just-"

"No, no. Yes. That is what I did... Being an alcoholic isn't a choice. It's a disease and it destroys peoples lives. It destroyed your Mum's childhood and her parents marriage. She had nights when she was a little kid and would wake up crying for your Mum but she wasn't there, no one was there. And then there was the fighting- plates smashing, fist fights! And the countless occasions she was on a tour bus with everyone around her taking drugs"

Sawyer's eyes are wide because Lucas's depiction of her mother's youth isn't as vague and child friendly as her Mum's version.

"I know you've got your heart set on being some little teen sensation but your Mum not signing you is just another great example of what a good parent she is. She's going to protect you for as long as she can"

Sawyer swallows. He's visibly upset. "...did you hurt her?"

"What?"

"Grandad is so nice now but he had a temper once he'd had a drink-"

"Your Mum's parents always had a tumultuous relationship-"

"Yours and Mum's wasn't like that?"

"No ours wasn't like that. I loved your Mum so much...I'm sure you know about what happened to Keith...he hauled your Mum out of the car that night. He stopped her from coming with me. If he hadn't she'd be dead right now...so yes, I hurt her. I ruined our relationship. I let my need for alcohol eat away at everything good in my life. But that doesn't mean I didn't love her"

'...Do you still?"

He sighs because he doesn't know how they ended up here and he doesn't know how to stop her questions. "We're meant to be having a lesson" He's painfully aware how wildly inappropriate this line of questioning is. Especially now. And he has to wonder if she knows exactly what's gone on.

"Dad thinks you do. They argue about it sometimes" Lucas ignores her statement and marches back over to her abandoned guitar.

"Here. Play"

Sawyer smiles then. "Really good teaching"

"Yeah? Well you're not being the best student"

"Students ask questions"

"Uhuh. About the subject they're studying"

"I feel like there's a lot I don't know about Mum" She shrugs. It's a simple truth.

"She's the best one to ask"

"That's debatable" He smirks because she sounds beyond her years in that moment. "I just want to know everything"

"Says the kid that said not fifteen minutes ago that she hates the woman in question" He teases.

She scowls. "...I just feel like sometimes there's, there's this wall between us"

"Kid, all you have to do is listen to any record of hers. She's always completely her when she's singing. Do you two make music together?"

"From what I can tell it's best not to mix family with music"

"That's what you've learnt?" Lucas's face contorts. "That's heartbreaking. Every great song your mother has ever written comes from love and life...family. They come together. And they clash sometimes but life isn't all rainbows. You should let your parents play music with you from time to time. It might make for the best song"

"Maybe...can I play you something I've been working on?"

"Hit me with it"

A shy smile touches her lips. "Kay...I'm stuck after the first bit though"

"You'll find the middle and the end, the beginning is always the toughest"

"I don't know. Don't you get scared of the ending?"

"Why?" He cocks his head.

"I don't know. What if it doesn't turn out as good as the beginning?"

"Are we still talking about music?" He squints. He was more than familiar with the teenager's mother talking in riddles.

She rolls her eyes. "Still talking about music. Never mind" She begins to strum, her eyes fixating on her fingers because she can't look at him. Is scared he'll see through her. Because the truth is she is scared. So scared about what he thinks about her. What he'll think about her if he finds out the truth. She so badly wants to scream it but at the same time she wants to pretend she never found out. She never wants this song to end. But deep down she knows it has to, even the best songs have an ending.