Edward
Who knew there were so many paint colours? Alice has always been the decorator in the family, from the kitchen, to Nessie's nursery, she seems to know exactly what will look good. I suspect the ability to see into the future probably gives her an unfair advantage there. An advantage that would be incredibly useful right now. But Ness and I had decided this was going to be a Father-Daughter project, and I wasn't about to give up the chance to spend a bit of time with her before our lives were potentially plunged into chaos once again. The peace was nice while it lasted, but I suppose I've always known something else was coming. That's the nature of immortality.
Ness has been asking to move out of the cottage and into the family home for weeks, claiming she needs a bit of independence now that she's fully grown. And even I have to admit, it's getting a bit cramped in there. It just so happens that Alexa's arrival couldn't come at a better time. We all agreed that we would do everything we could to make her feel like part of the family. Nessie was the one who suggested the two share my old room in the house. So here I am sitting on the floor with my daughter, staring at about twenty different paint samples on the walls, featuring everything from light pink to neon orange.
"I like the pink." I state, hoping that Ness would agree and we could get on with the actual painting part.
"Yeah, maybe if we were five." Nessie says sarcastically.
"I believe that was only two years ago for you, even less for her." I laugh. She just rolls her eyes, clearly not finding my joke funny.
"Ness, you know you'll always be my little girl. Even if you're not so little anymore." I tell her.
"I'm sorry I grew up so fast." She says, and she is. I don't need to be able to read her mind to know she understands me. She understands my desire to keep her my baby for as long as possible.
"For what it's worth, I'm very proud of the person you've become." I say, looking at her with the kind of awe only a father knows.
"It's worth everything Dad." She smiles, the smile that's become my whole world, and then comes in for a hug. If I could freeze this moment in time I would. But I can't, eventually I'll have to let her go. "So what's she like?" I hear her ask, not releasing me from her embrace yet.
"She's a lot like you. Just a bit less perfect." I joke, and feel her laugh against me.
"Do you think she'll be happy here?" She asks, I can hear the worry in her voice echoed in her mind.
"I hope so. But there's a lot she'll have to unpack over the next few weeks. We can't expect her to be happy all the time. All we can do is make it easier for her." I tell her, hoping that might ease her anxiety a bit. It seems to do the opposite as I suddenly hear the guilt come back to her thoughts. "Hey, Ness, look at me." I say, grasping her upper arms gently until her eyes meet mine. "None of this is your fault."
"If Irina hadn't seen me that day then Aro never would have…"
"Hey." I cut her off. "Everyone meets Aro eventually."
"Nahuel and his sisters didn't. Not until me."
"Every Cullen meets Aro eventually. I think he's a bit obsessed with us." I joke, trying to make her smile again.
"Why is that?" She asks.
"We have powerful abilities. Aro likes powerful abilities. He finds them useful."
"So how powerful is Demetri?"
"Let's just say, I feel much safer knowing that he's on our side. Let's hope he stays that way."
"You don't trust him." She says, it's not a question. I can tell how apparent my scepticism is.
"I don't trust any of the Volturi. I respected them once, but they're not what I thought they were."
"What made you change your mind?"
"Killing Irina was unnecessary. I know she brought us a lot of fear and grief, but she was simply trying to follow their rules. And the more I reflect on their actions, the more I realise just how corrupt they are." I explain. There are so many things I would change about that whole situation if I could.
"I get the impression Demetri feels the same. Maybe not about Irina, but about Aro."
"He turned his back on everything he knows in order to do the right thing. He's earned a level of trust, but not without caution." I say, trying to instil the same level of caution in her.
"I have a good feeling about him, when he's not trying to be charming." She tells me, having no idea how glad I am to hear her say that. I'm equal parts proud and elated to know my daughter isn't one to easily fall prey to the charms of a man, or vampire as the case may be.
"You're going to be just fine, you know that?" I ask, smiling.
"I do, do you?" She replies, a cheeky grin lighting up her face.
"I'll try to remember." I laugh, pulling her into another hug.
"Dad, can I ask you something?" I hear, her voice muffled against me.
"Of course sweetheart." I say, letting go to look at her.
"You seem different since you've gotten back from Italy." Her powers of observation never fail to amaze me.
"Different how?" I ask, trying to play dumb, even though I know it won't work.
"Like you're trying to smile more to hide the fact that you're sad." She explains.
"You don't miss anything do you?" I finally give in, knowing she's absolutely right.
"Not in this house." She smiles.
"I never really thought much about children. I was turned when I was seventeen, and after that, there was no reason to. Until you came along. And while I admit, it took me a while to come around to the idea of being a father, I can't imagine a world that you're not the centre of now. Every child deserves for their parents to feel like that." I tell her.
"And Alexa's father doesn't." She replies, knowingly.
"If anyone treated you the way Alexa's been treated—" I start, feeling my whole body begin to clench in anger.
"They won't." She interrupts." Because I have the best dad in the world. And he won't let them." She smiles up at me again, it's one of those moments that make you realise you will do anything for your child.
"Are you about to ask for something?" I joke.
"Well I wasn't, but if now's a good time, I was hoping Jake and I could—" She replies, teasingly.
"Don't even go there." I cut her off, okay maybe I'm not willing to do anything for her. I confess, I can be selfish sometimes. Lord knows I was with her mother. I thought I understood Charlie back then, but having Nessie has made me realise that I didn't even know the half of it.
"I wouldn't want to ruin the moment." She laughs, hugging me again.
"I am glad you have him though. As boyfriends go, you could do worse." I tell her, somewhat begrudgingly.
"Did Edward Cullen just compliment Jacob Black? Someone should alert the press." She taunts.
"Fine, I take it back." I grumble.
"Nope, you can't, it's out there now. You like Jake." She says, a childish sing-songy tone in her voice.
"I approve of Jacob." I clarify.
"Oh, you approve do you? What is this a car inspection?" She asks.
"More like a suitor inspection." I tell her.
"Dad, has anyone ever told you that you talk like you're from the 1900s?" She jokes.
"Yeah, I believe I've heard that one somewhere." I laugh, not entirely unsure where she got her sense of humour and wit from.
"I love you Dad. And I know that I'm lucky you love me as much as you do." She says, giving me yet another one of those moments that all parents live for.
"I'm the lucky one." I reply, returning her smile with my own.
"So what colour?" She asks, sensing it's time for us to get back to the task at hand.
"Not pink?"
"Not pink. Maybe the red."
"Sure, if you're Dracula." I joke. "What about brown? Your mother once told me it was her favourite colour."
"Brown's so boring." She groans.
"I used to think that. But it matches your eyes."
"What colour are Alexa's eyes?" She asks. Leave it to my daughter to always be thinking of others. She definitely didn't inherit my selfish nature.
"Blue." I answer.
"Blue's nice."
"Not as nice as brown, but yeah, blue's nice."
"Blue it is then."
"Good, now that that decision is made—" I start, happy to have that decision behind us.
"What shade?" She cuts me off.
"Maybe we should get Alice's opinion." I admit.
"I think that's the best idea you've had all day." She laughs. But I'm secretly grateful it took me so long to cave. I would have happily looked through thousands of paint samples just to spend the time with her. I know as time goes on, these opportunities will become fewer and further between. All I can do is be grateful for the moments we have.