Determined to go back home. I mean not home, where is home supposed to be when you have just gravitated through different timelines? I don't even know who I am, right now. Am I capable of cheating on my wife? Leave the country and not even make a call to my beautiful son? Anyways, what I'm saying is I want to go back to the apartment. I'll most probably find some answers there. So, I hit the stairs. In the bedroom where I woke up, I find my trench coat. Amongst other items, like that Queen of Hearts card that I carry everywhere, I found the key to my apartment in one of its many pockets. Maybe this key will work, maybe it won't. If it doesn't, I can always pick the lock, non? So why am I even wasting my time on this? Yes, the coat. I cannot simply leave it behind.

At the moment Anna showed me the address on her cell phone, one slot, at least one, fell into place. I remembered that I was eyeing that property some time before California happened. It was first intended as a safe house. Then, things failed with Anna, and being in the mansion all of the time became a torture. She would barely look into my eyes, let alone talk to me, so I left to give her the space she seemed to need. Only at that day in the cemetery I found out why she was so distant, she was fucking depressed and I am a moron for not having noticed. Anyway, I decided to buy the place and turn it into a proper home. Later came the cats, then, finally, years later, Joelle.

So the apartment is mine, I concluded. As I married Anna, I must have kept the place secret, hidden from everyone. It must be a safe house, as I had first planned. Not even my wife knew about it. Apparently, I'm still keeping secrets from her, and somehow I'm not amazed. These secrets, I don't know why I have them, but I just do. Maybe I'm afraid once my mysterious aura is gone, no one will really give a shit about me. But this is Rogue, my one true love, the woman I could never really let go. She's the woman who gave me a child. She's my wife.

Wife! Rogue is my wife. I'll never take it for granted, that my Anna became my Mrs. Who knew I'd finally tame my wild spitfire of a Southerner? I guess the same could be said about me. She managed to shackle me in marriage. We both deserve some prize for that. However, I'm not sure she really did domesticate me, because, according to what she says, I took off with another woman.

It makes me wonder, have I really cheated on her as she believes? I gotta find a way to know the truth.

Just as I was leaving the mansion, my head spinning uncontrollably as I was immersed in thoughts, trying to work out what went down, I hear her calling out my name. I froze in place and could hear nothing but her hurried steps towards me. When she stopped right in front of me, I prepared myself to be verbally abused or something, but she didn't speak. She eyed me cautiously instead. Her green eyes shining, lips parted. She was like a magazine cut-out dropped in front of me. Beautiful Anna, my Anna.

"Remy?" Only now I realize I haven't uttered a single word to acknowledge her.

My usual swagger fled faster than a gambler from a bookie. I swallowed nervously. I lose my grace and usual calm poise, it amazes me the effect this woman has on me. And she's been mine, time and again, she's carrying my child. She's my wife. All these notions, they are drilled into my mind now. I want nothing more than to please her and make her love me again. But this is no fairy tale, this is real life. She believes I cheated on her and her resentment shows in every little thing she does.

"Um, yeah. This is Remy. I mean me, future me, now, present me." She didn't smile, now replaying the scene in my head, I realize how ridiculous I must've sounded. And I was. I mean, ridiculously confused. Guess I still am.

"Sorry. What is it, chére? Do you need anything?" I ask with my heart in my mouth.

"Here. Take this." Her eyebrows raised and she extended a manicured hand. She handed me a flash drive memory stick, managing to avoid even the tiniest portion of her hand to touch mine.

"So what can I expect to find here, chére?"

"Memories, Remy. Memories you don't have. This is not me, okay. You did it for yourself. For when our timeline met yours and you had no clue of what happened." I gasped. Now that was thoughtful. I'll make a mental note of thanking myself for that. "I knew you were doing this, and you always told me where to find it, in case, well, you, future you, now you, whatever, showed up. I'm not your greatest friend right now, but it would be too vile on my part if I didn't give this to you."

"Mercy, chére. That will be… really helpful."

"Yeah, well, have fun watching what you threw away." She said bitterly. And with that, she turned her back to me and was about to leave when I asked her not to.

"Chére! Anna! Please, stay for a second, would you? Please?" She looked over her shoulder, a tear had rolled down her face. That's why she was running away from me.

"What is it, Remy? What is it that you want?" She was now sniffling.

"Can I… Can I touch your… Can I feel the baby in you?" She let out an annoyed breath in response. "Please?" I insist. She could have said no, right? If she really didn't want me near her, she could have refused, but she didn't. She turned and stood in front of me, held out her hand and as soon as I placed mine in hers, she guided it to her belly. She never looked into my eyes, but watched my hand as I touched her stomach. Oh, the sensation. It was unworldly. I could actually feel the buzz of our skins in contact, and what was under hers, our baby. I could feel it, I could feel it moving.

"She doesn't move that often." She commented.

"You said she? But we still don't know if it's a boy or a girl, right? That's what you told me."

"No. I just have a feeling." She replied softly. "There are some advanced blood tests that can tell you, but I want to see it in the scan. So far, no luck. Baby's had his or her legs crossed."

"Really?"

"Yeah." We let out a deep sigh together, as if timed and choreographed. She let go of my hand, ending our connection abruptly. Not knowing what to do with my hands, I shoved them into my pocket.

"So, delivery made. Goodbye now, Remy." She said in a thin voice.

"Bye, chére." I said when all I wanted to do was to do some Hollywood dance with her, take her by the hand, twist her body around, hold the small of her back and lean into her for a cinematographic kiss. Her hand would come up and brush my face as our kiss went on and on. But no lights, no kiss, no Anna, she vanished up the stairs. It was just me and the road to hit.

So I head to the apartment, dying for having at least that as a familiar environment. The key I had didn't work, but I let myself in regardless. I took a look around and it was deserted, only me now. I find what I assume is my laptop computer. I had to try a few of my passwords until I got the correct one, and finally, I can see the things I prepared for myself to watch. There was a read me file, something cheeky I wrote myself and instructions regarding the best order to watch the videos.

The first one was our wedding day. He, Remy from the past, explained that Anna had told him about my time travel that very day. And I decided to record small videos so that I would be able to see the important events when I came back from my timeline meddling experience.

"First of, merci pour interferer. That was the best meddling ever! Finally someone did something nice to me, and surprise, surprise, it was myself!" I was flustered, and had probably been drinking. It was probably towards the end of the party. I filmed some of the people there. There were Stormy and Kitty in their bridesmaid gowns. Logan and Hank who looked drunker than me. Belle and her new husband were also there. I told her the reason I was making that video.

"Hello, future Remy! I hope you're still married to Rogue when you finally get to see this." She said in her acid humour. We both laughed at it and I assured her I would grow old with my Southern belle. You know? Southern belle as in Belle, get the joke?

And then, all else was just a blur, because there was her, my bride. A vision of perfection.

"Now her, Remy, mon ami. Look at her. You gotta see this woman of ours." She was absolutely stunning. She was not perfectly polished anymore and that was what looked absolutely perfect to me. She must have danced or something. Some strands of her hair had already broken free from the intricate hairdo she had going on, make up was a little smudged, especially on the lips area. I'd say it could only have been my doing. I never thought wedding dresses could be particularly beautiful. I thought women could look much better in other outfits. But her, she was a vision to behold. Thank you again, past me, for letting me in on this. She looked like an angel, but sexy, oh so sexy. I will never be able to describe her wedding dress, I wouldn't know all the jargon involved, but I can tell you about that plunging neckline. Man, what the fuck was that! I got a hard on just watching her come skipping my way. Such a wide smile adorned her lips. It seemed she was happy to take me as her husband, so happy. Wasn't she pregnant yet? If she was, I couldn't tell.

"What's going on, husband? What are you doing with that camera?" She asks in a playful tone.

"Getting it ready and set for our wedding night sex tape." He says with a sneer and then does a face to the camera.

"You fucker!" She says, hitting me in the arm as she always does.

"Exactly! That's the spirit, chére." The camera is put away. But I can hear the sounds and little moans as we kiss.

"Not here, love. Not now, we got all life for that. Let's enjoy our party." She says in between smooch sounds. Remy is in view again.

"Well, that's bye for now, brother." And the video ended.

And that's how I spent the night, watching countless videos, videos of Anna's pregnancy, scans, many more videos of Oli and his baby achievements.

It was well past three in the morning, and I was watching him say his first words, Joelle arrived. His first word was daddy by the way, much to Anna's dismay.

"Remy!" She said. "Waiting for me, dear?" She said, then rested the palm of each of her hands on my shoulders, bent over and kissed me. I didn't exactly respond to the kiss as she might have expected. I didn't push her away, but didn't deepen it either.

"So, how was your day?" She asked with a smile. "You took off when I was sleeping last night apparently. It was the day of the scan, right? So, what is it? Could you guys see it this time?" She asked about the child Anna is expecting with such excitement that got me puzzled. I decided to play along and see how much info she'd give me.

"Non, she was… well, she was not in a good mood today. So she cancelled it."

"Oh, really? Is that so? I was at home until 6pm and you hadn't arrived. Did she let you spend the day with Oli? How's he doing?" She seemed too fond of and interested in my children. I couldn't decide if this was okay or not.

"He's fine. We played all day together. Logan made him a tree house and he loved it. My back now hurts. I was crouching inside of it for the best part of the day."

"I could always give you a back rub, handsome." There. There is something between us indeed. My correct answer would be a smirk, a tease, and a full blown sexual advance. But I'm not that good an actor, and I was so down, after watching all the things I had and now I don't, I couldn't even bring myself to put an effort into lying and playing my part. So what came out was a grunt.

"What is it, Remy?"

"Nothing, I… it's nothing."

"Missing Oli already? You know what you should do. You should sign those papers, divorce her and then you'll guys have everything settled in court. He should spend more time with you and you know it. You'll get shared custody, so he'll spend half the time with you. You know I love him too, like a mother would. I could be his second mama when he's here with us." That! Now that gave me the creeps. Is that what this is all about? She's lost her daughter and now wants me and my children as a replacement. Is that why she decided to go on, then? So I

could give her a new family? The mere hypothesis in my head made me mad at her. How could I keep faking it? She read my silence and my lack of reactions but responded as if Anna was the source of trouble.

"Why won't you talk to me, Remy? I know, it's her, right? You're still loving her. She doesn't want you back, dear. How hard is it for you to get that? It doesn't matter how many times you tell her what really happened during our crazy rollercoaster ride to get the formula from the secret HYDRA base. She judges you by that scene alone. She's never really loved you or trusted you, Remy. Can't you see that? Why would you want to be with an impulsive woman like her? An impulsive woman who doesn't trust you, that is."

"So, nothing happened between us before she found us?"

"Why are you asking me this?"

"Answer me!" I shouted. Ok, I totally threw care to the wind.

"I know what this is."

"Fuck, Joelle. Answer the damn question!"

"You're the time travelling Gambit! I've read all about you, sweetie. I wrote myself a letter, a letter you delivered to me, without ever opening it. And I know more about you than you can imagine."

"So you played me!" I spoke angrily.

"No, I didn't. I just didn't kill myself like my other self had planned, simply because I didn't feel like dying. You! I saw potential in you. I fell in love with the man the Joelle you know described so tenderly in that letter. I thought that maybe, maybe you're worth it. You're worth living for."

"Has you daughter passed away?" I asked, regaining my calm and confidence. She nodded her head and looked away from me for the first time since she arrived. She hugged herself instinctively and stared outside the window.

"And we got the chemical you were looking for?" Again, another nod.

"And you haven't killed yourself?"

"Well, that's the part where you should say 'I'm glad that you made the right choice." I say I'm sorry she got the impression I wanted her dead. She told me that she kept the chemical in her possession, so she can have a way out like everyone else. She said I made her happy. Cold-heartedly, I said I just wanted to be with Rogue and our child. That was all.

She was not standing on my way, or was she? I gather the courage and ask her what exactly happened.

"I know what she saw. She must've seen the same scene she witnessed in my timeline. I want to know if it was innocent this time around, though, because it had been the first time. We only hooked up much later, after all the baddies were out of our way. Was it the same this time? Or did I cheat on my wife? She seems very convinced that I did."

"You didn't. But the point is, will you take my word? Will she? So what difference does it make what I say? Besides, that's information you already had. You probably told her your version of the facts, but she had none of it. Sorry, handsome, I don't see how this knowledge could help you." I swallow hard at her words. She's right.

"Are we together now? Me and you?"

"Kind of."

"So we…"

"It seems like you don't know yourself. She kicked you out, you came to this place where you had let me stay. Because I… I have lost all I had to pay for my daughter's treatment. But don't worry, dear, we only got intimate after she kicked your sorry ass out of her bed. So, in my book, this is not cheating. She let you go first."

"Not sure it's the same in HER book." I commented with a fake little smile.

"Remy, me and you, we're so much alike. We are cool and collected while Rogue is hysterical, way too emotional, all over the place. She's impulsive, she's… she's a fucking drama queen! Why would you even bother? Your children will always be your children, whether you're together or not. And you can have me, a person who acts cool like you. I won't try to tame you, won't try to turn you into someone you're not." I hear her words and sigh. 'But you're not whom I love.' I reply in my head. As if I could control what I feel for Anna. If there was any reason in it, I'd never ever even come close to her.

"We can do some thieving together when we get bored of everyday life." She said with a smile, tentatively brushing a finger on my chin, bringing my eyes to level with hers. I stared at her, never saying a word.

"I love you, Remy." She says. Those are not the lips I want to hear these words from, I know.

Mon Dieu, I thought I'd be solving my problems by turning back in time. Merde! If only I knew I'd be bringing my love life to a whole new level of fuckedness.

But I'll take it all gracefully because now I'm a father of two and Anna is still known as Mrs. LeBeau.

I tell Joelle I need time alone. She is cool indeed. She says goodnight and leaves me be. I flip my laptop open again and go back to watching my videos. I fall asleep to the sound of Anna's and Oli's voices.

-O-

Author's notes:

No cliff hangers this time! :D I'm proud of my achievement, I did feel like leaving something in the air, but I refrained from it.

Thanks everybody who reviewed, I'm not sure I thanked each one individually. I always feel like replying to guests but there's no way. I'd like to reply to 'Jai' and I'll do it here. You read last chapter three times? I'm so glad you liked it this much! The confession is almost like an 'I love you' to an author. We want nothing more than having our work read. Thank you. And also, Legna, I laughed at your "Jesus H Christ" exclamation. It's like all your feelings towards the chapter in a few words.

Danielemlac, I did miss you, dear. Welcome back!

To all the other reviewers, thank you, sorry if I forgot to send you a PM as I always do.

To Kataract52 and Jehilew, who've become my personal friends, thank you for your continued support and girlie luv. :D I'm glad I have amazing writers such as you guys as faithful reviewers.