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Note : My five years of passion and hard work, finally someone wants to translate my work! I'm so happy! Thanks SasuNari! This chapter's idea is generated by Cheshire SN by the way! She has been a great help since the beginning of the vacation part! And for those others who gave their suggestions too, thank you so much! I might add some of it here!

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Love Me For Thirty Days

DAY FOURTEEN

Friday

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"But maybe you never really had someone, she thought now. Maybe, no matter how much you loved them, they could slip through your fingers like water, and there was nothing you could do about it."
― Cassandra Clare, City of Fallen Angels

Was it a blunder or had it been purposely done for? Seijuurou had always thought that he had been the cause of an upbringing of a feeling of loss toward a certain someone. Never in his life would he thought that he experienced karma. A payback for all his sins that he had inflicted onto that particular person. It occurred so fast, that the redhead admitted ― no matter how much he had known, he was still unprepared for the worst to come.

It could be anytime. Even today, perhaps. That every moment was worth the memories, for they'd be at loss when it ticked by his mind. Any moment.

But still, Seijuurou wasn't a man worth of handling his intentions. No matter what, his entire being had always been so readable towards the certain person.

"Of all places. . . Why did you choose San Roque?"

Many reasons, to be honest. Sometimes, Seijuurou began to think if everything that happened around them had been such a rush lately. Crowded streets and narrow lanes and conversations upon conversation fitted together into a lovely bundle of chaotic mess, perturbing his desire for some moment of peace. He wasn't a fan of noisy places, partially due to his decent upbringing too. But mostly, because his companion was also known to be such a serene person, he had never bothered about it before. The serenity calmed him despite other circumstances.

Such were the beauty of Kuroko Tetsuya. His colours matched his soul, his eccentricities, his persona. They were the gentlest of blues, reminding the fiery Akashi of white sands and calming shores.

His mind had brought him to Palimbang itself, to the beach brimming with nothing but silence and the streaks of passionate shades of blue. It had always been his very favourite, and he felt the urge to capture the fact that Tetsuya blend well with the very place.

"Because this place reminds me very much of you," he admitted blatantly, his very eyes focusing deep into the azure ones. Tetsuya might have blushed, his cheeks a sprinkle of crimson and he laughed his typical airy laughter.

Briefly, his eyes had shone but faded ever so slightly, as if a thought might had made him so disturbed right when everything was beginning to fall into the right places.

Tetsuya remained silent. He tried smiling but lately, Seijuurou knew his problem had its occurrences quite as often by far.

So far, it was just an assumption. But a smart person such as the likes of Akashi Seijuurou did not need any confirmations just to get on the track of what was happening. He was very well aware that Tetsuya was standing at the very edge of his conflict, a push might lead to his downfall.

He wanted to talk about it.

But damn, Seijuurou knew the blunette was never be able to be ready.

To be honest, he wasn't either.

"When will you tell me?"

He said it, in hopes the blunette might had open up. But he saw, he observed, the falter in the blue eyes each time a relatable question was spoken, the way his shoulders flinched and the curl of his fists.

Seijuurou only wanted the cause, not the whole truth. He, of all, never wanted to hear a dear person choking the whole bad news within one conversation ― Oh, he knew he wasn't strong enough to handle the situation otherwise. But Tetsuya was the most stubborn. When his mind had set on something, the decision ― in spite of the conditions ― will always be permanent.

Softly, Tetsuya slid his fingers in his own hand. The sand tickled their feet that sunk deeper as they made their way to the shore, occasionally feeling trickling waters caressing their soles like a gentle lover. He made his way silently, guiding the redhead and slowly stroked the chiseled face. "We agreed yesterday, don't we? One step at a time, slowly and slowly. That when I'm ready, I'll tell you everything."

Seijuurou closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation of being touched. He sighed, almost morbidly, as his arms circled their way around the smaller lad's waist. "But I won't be ready. . ."

The complain made the blunette giggled, causing confusion to be written all over the redhead's face. "Do you think that I'll be fully prepared, Sei?"

Such depth in his words, Seijuurou felt a tang of bitterness in his mouth and he swallowed unwillingly. The blue in his eyes remained unfazed, strong and passionate. "Allow me," Seijuurou breathed, and within moments, Tetsuya rose from his stance just to have himself by the strong arms of an Akashi. How long had he not felt the intoxicating body heat? How long had he forget the strong muscles carrying him bridal-styled?

That night, they made love but it was forlorn. It was sloppy. It was desperate. They clung more to each other, unable to let go because of the fear deep down. They missed each other, not just physically. Not like the first time they had sex on the first day of their deal. That was just plain sex, of actions and displays and merely raw of emotions. This time, it was everything opposite.

Emotions building up, promising words to fluttery touches to curious explores of the whole body. It wasn't heatful, rather they just wanted to experience the emotions that hadn't been in presence for years. They missed each other, the sounds they made ― the sounds Tetsuya made in bed. It rang something in the back of the redhead's mind, but he was obliged to listen as his hands and lips roamed and marked the smooth complexion of Tetsuya.

They took the whole night, simply because they wanted this to last unlike previously. That when morning came, all they could remember was their perfect night.

In and out, in and out, in and out. Slowly and slowly, increasing the speed with every ounce of energy he could muster ever so slightly. Erratic moans to screams of pure pleasure and the demand for more ― more of the kisses, more of the touches, more of the feeling of being filled. Yes, yes! Tetsuya missed such tremor.

This wasn't just sex, more than making love. This was about the memories, the lasting sensation of physical form of expressing love.

This was about gain and loss, and Seijuurou knew no matter how much he gained, it was bound to slip away.

Anytime, soon.

TO BE CONTINUED

Mozu : I can't afford long updates, ugh. I'm sorry there's not much action to the smut, it's more like a statement. Because I want to press more on the emotions than the physical form in the words.

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-Mozu The Mochi (2016)