Dee Dee opened her eyes, still retaining enough of her cop senses that she could tell she was being watched. She'd been dreaming that he was home and, when she opened her eyes and saw him, he thought it was still a dream, one she didn't want to wake from. "Rick?"
Hunter sat on the bed as he had many times before, facing her, one leg on the bed, one dangling off. He still couldn't believe it was really her and he wasn't even sure where to start with all the questions in his mind. He said the only thing he could. "Welcome home."
"Welcome home?" She hugged him tightly, looking up at his face, tears running down her own again. He looked tired and stressed, they both were, but he was very definitely alive. He still felt the same when he held her. From the moment he'd first hugged her, she'd felt the warmth, safety, stability, and, later, the love, first as they truly became partners and later as their feelings had developed. "I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you, Rick. How? Why?"
"I didn't know. I never would have done that to Ma…or you." He brushed aside her straight hair, missing the curls. He cupped her cheek and the feeling of it still was the same, the feeling that he'd do anything, even die, to protect her. She had been his best friend, his confidant, his partner, and one of the two loves of his life, still was. "I'm sorry, Dee Dee."
"Liliana. Does she know?" She sat up, worried about the older woman.
"She does. Charlie's downstairs with her. I'll tell you everything, okay, but…then I have some questions of my own." He saw her hand was devoid of the ring Alex had put on six months before. Had he been fool enough to get her pregnant and then leave her? If he had, Rick could already plot the other man's "untimely" death.
McCall nodded, letting Rick sit back with his back against the wall before she lay her head against him, feeling his arms still around her. It dawned on her that he didn't know she was separated, but, although he'd been very against dating married women before, they found themselves in their old routine again, closer than two people could possibly be, almost where they could feel the other breathe.
"Charlie and Chris thought they were protecting me, I think. That if I was dead, the dirtbag would stop coming. I wasn't awake until this morning, when I found out…I never would have let them tell Ma I was dead. Or you." He knew how scared she'd always been of losing him like she'd lost her husband. His tiny partner was so fiercely protective of everyone, but no one more than him.
"So you were hurt," McCall said, trying to understand the line of thought on this. She believed him 100% that he would never have done this to Liliana or herself; Rick didn't have it in him to be purposely cruel. Even when he was going to shoot her rapist, he was doing it as protection, not punishment.
He nodded. "I was hurt. Signed out AMA. Charlie said…I had to see you both." He paused. "He said that you went to the funeral, but stood alone." It shouldn't matter, but somehow it did.
"I…I never should have gone to London, Rick. I never should have gotten married." She saw him tense when she said that. "No. I'm okay. Alex would never hurt me. I hurt him. And you. It was the last thing in the world that I ever wanted to do. Neither of you deserved it. I just…I wanted a child. I thought if I was in London, when the time, this time, came, it wouldn't hurt so badly."
"Were you right?" He asked softly.
"No. I think…I think it was worse. I blamed myself for not being here for you, like you've always been for me. That's why I didn't stand with Charlie and the blonde. I couldn't…I couldn't stand there and have her say the same words I've been telling myself for days now. That I didn't protect you. That I wasn't here when you needed me."
"Dee Dee." He kissed her forehead. "You had a right to be happy. I never wanted to stand in the way of that. I know how badly you wanted to be a mom. And that you didn't want to be a cop OR a cop's wife when you finally did have that family." He paused. "Where is Alex? Why isn't he here with you?"
"We're getting a divorce." No matter what happened next, she knew those words were true. She could not go back to London and let Alex raise the baby while Rick never got to see his child. It wasn't fair, to any of them.
Rick's jaw tightened and she saw the muscles in his arms do the same, a sure sign that he was furious. "Did he hurt you?"
"No. No, Rick. He didn't." She paused, sighing. "Marrying him was my mistake and divorce is what I have to do to set it right." She closed her eyes on the next, not afraid, but definitely wary of how he would react. "He's not the father."
Hunter frowned, thinking of the last time they'd been together, before all hell broke loose. Before he'd known she was dating Alex, let alone serious enough to get married to him. It was what had brought everything up all over again, that she'd wanted a child, that she didn't want to be a cop anymore when she had it, and that she didn't want to marry a cop. That was all he knew how to be. "Who's is it?" He whispered gently.
"Yours." Suddenly she knew she would be okay if she was a single mother, if he was so angry that he didn't want anything to do with her or the baby, that she'd survive. She also knew it wouldn't be her Rick if he didn't want to be involved, whether or not he still loved her after all was said and done.
"Mine." He paused, resting his head on hers, sensing she needed to talk.
She nodded. "There was a mistake with the due date. They thought, since the baby isn't very big, that it was younger, but the blood test and how far the baby has progressed says otherwise." She paused. "I told Alex as soon as I knew for sure. But before I could call you…" She shook her head, trying to void the horrendous memories. "I was going to tell you."
"I'll never know how we keep missing each other like we do." He paused. "How timelines don't always add up for us." He paused. "I'm always going to be a cop, Dee Dee. It's who I am."
She looked up at him. "I know who you are, Rick. I also want my daughter to know her father. If you can't forgive me for this mess, that's one thing, but…I know who you are. Sometimes I think as well, if not better, than you do."
He smiled, knowing she was right about that. He had one more question he had to ask, had to know. "If there were no baby? If we hadn't gotten pregnant?"
"The second I got that call my life stopped, Rick. It's why I'm here. Why I wasn't going back to London, regardless. When I thought I lost you…again…I realized what I'd done. Baby or no baby." She paused. "I didn't want to stand at your grave like I did Steve's. But I did it. I survived it. And all I know is that I'd rather have a month with you than ten years without. I don't know why it took me so long to figure it out. I guess some things I do run from. But I've stopped running now."
He wasn't quite sure what to say. He wasn't angry at her, at all, no matter what. This was like a dream come true to him, like maybe he had died and this was heaven. "Charlie thinks if the shooter thinks I'm dead, that I'm safe, but…it just doesn't feel that way." He paused. "I shouldn't have gotten you and Mom involved, but…the second Charlie told me he thought he saw you, I couldn't stay away. I couldn't have from Ma anyway, after all she's lost."
McCall nodded, tears in her eyes again. She had cried so much in the past week she felt like she could drown. "We'll do whatever needs to be done to keep you safe." He raised her chin with his hand and kissed her softly, one hand on her stomach, smiling as their baby moved.