Dean tipped his head back and swiped at the tears in a futile effort to stop them. "Why didn't you tell me sooner?" he asked, his voice cracking.
Cas let out another sob. "Because what was there to be happy about, Dean? Everything went to shit afterwards."
"But you're not happy now," he pointed out, desperately grasping at straws.
"I have to pay my debts and keep up my end of the bargain, Dean." He bowed his head and sobbed some more, wishing he too could stop crying. This wasn't helping anything and was in fact making it worse.
Dean shook his head, willing his body to stop shaking. "We'll figure a way to get you out of this," he desperately responded.
"There is no getting out of this." Cas squared his shoulders, then inhaled. He didn't want to leave anything unsaid, didn't want to have any regrets this time around. "Fuck." Dean cocked his head at the angel curiously. Cas blew out another breath. "I know this is the wrong time to say it - we have shit timing, that much is clear.. But I am head in heels in love with you, Dean Winchester. Always have been, always will be. You deserved to know the truth."
Dean wanted to throw something and his knees buckled but he forced himself to stay upright. "I'm in love with you too, Cas. Please don't go."
Cas nervously chuckled and his whole body shuddered. "Aw, isn't this quaint? An angel of the Lord brought to its knees by a human," the Shadow mocked, a smile on its face.
Dean turned to face the Shadow. "Don't you fucking dare take him. I will stop you," he tried to threaten but none of them bought it since he was still crying so hard he was barely standing upright.
The Shadow cackled. "I'd like to see you try. You may be a hunter but you're a mere mortal."
Dean turned back to face Cas. "We're going to save you, Cas. Don't you fucking dare doubt that." He whirled around to the Shadow again. "Did you hear me? We're going to save him."
Bored, the Shadow could only sigh. It wouldn't put it past them - the Winchesters, their angel, and the Nephilm could do anything they set their minds to - but a deal was a deal. Shit had to play out a certain way. "Are you done threatening me now?"
Cas bit his lip. "Dean, I know you and the rest of our family can take down Chuck. Do whatever it takes - I'm counting on you to save the world again. I have the utmost faith in you."
The Shadow started tapping its foot. "Can we get this show on the road?"
"In a minute!" Cas snapped. "Tell Sam and Jack I love them, alright? Make sure our son is safe and loved."
"You know I will, Cas. And they love you too. The three of us are going to storm the gates of Heaven, Hell, and the Empty, and bring it all down."
Cas walked towards Dean and passionately kissed him. "One for the road," he joked when they pulled apart, their foreheads still touching.
"And more to come," Dean vowed. He kissed him again and broke some more when Cas joined the Shadow. The two of them disappeared in a flash of light, leaving him alone to stew in grief and anger.
Dean and Sam had saved the world so many times before and this was no exception. They had hit some bumps in the road this time - as always - and shit looked bleak but Chuck was going to regret coming after them. The Shadow would pay too (Dean would make sure of that) just as soon as they took care of this situation. This was another blow - a pretty big one at that - but he wasn't going to completely fall apart this time. Cas' death wasn't permanent, that he knew for certain.
Hell hath no fury like a hunter, especially Dean Winchester, scorned. After this, once they saved the universe yet again, they were done. Retirement sounded better more and more each day. For once, he was keeping the faith instead of giving into the desperation enveloping his very core.
The end was near, one way or another.