Chapter 7: Feelings

Even though he had snapped out of his trance, Chris still felt a little woozy.

"Hey man, you alright?" Hurk asked with concern.

"Yeah, I'm fine." His thoughts were becoming clearer as he remembered what occurred before his incident.

"Hey Grace, could you call the sheriff and tell him to meet us here?"

"On it." She took out her radio and stepped out to call Whitehorse.

Chris turned to look at the rest of the group that was standing around him. "Can you guys give me a few minutes?" They all nodded and started walking to the bar to congregate. Chris saw Jess among the group and motioned her over. "Jess, can I speak to you in private?" She gave him her usual angry look as he pointed to a small room nearby. Before they entered, Chris turned his head to Faith. "We won't be long if you just want to wait out here." Faith nodded in understanding and made her way to a spot next to the door. Chris closed the door and let out a big sigh.

"So what the hell happened?" he questioned Jess

"Jacob's little conditioning kicked in after you heard the trigger and you started going berserk. I was just about ready to kick your ass if you didn't go back to normal."

"Well it's a good thing it didn't get to that point or I'd be in trouble!" They both smirked at each other but Jess returned to her frown.

"It didn't get to that point because little miss bliss just walked right up to you and started touching you despite Nick telling her you were dangerous." Chris rubbed his chin remembering Faith appearing to him in the trance.

"And just like that, your ass went back to normal. I may fucking despise her but I gotta give her props. Whatever she did worked." Chris smiled. He was very used to Jess' vulgar language seeing as he used it himself sometimes. May have been part of the reason why they bonded so quickly.

"Oh, coming around to her now huh? He joked giving her a playful nudge.

She swatted his arm away. "Fuck no! I just give a shit about what happens to you. You're the only one who can keep up with my peggy extermination skills." The both laughed but it was Chris' turn to be serious.

"Listen Jess, I wanna apologize for before."

"For what?"

"For snapping at you like I did. We've been through a lot together. I should have known exactly how you would react no matter how I introduced it. Plus, there's the fact that I had lied to you before about her being with me. So, I'm sorry." He hung his head.

Jess was silent for a few moments then spoke up. "Well you definitely fucked up big time Chris but…" She let out a sigh. "…I've learned that you almost always mean well with your actions. With what happened just recently, maybe you're right." Chris perked up.

"With what she did, maybe she can be helpful for us. Just keep her ass out of my way ok?" Chris was so relieved that he moved to give Jess a hug even though he knew she wasn't usally a fan of that sort of contact. The gesture shocked her but she held back from saying anything and returned the embrace which surprised him. They broke and Jess went back to her usual frown.

"So why'd you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Don't give me that. Why did you not only spare her but take her with you?" It had been bothering Jess ever since she found out. Chris looked around while he thought of a response.

"Because of what she told me. That Joseph took advantage of her at the lowest point of her life. She thought that he finally gave her a purpose and a sense of belonging but she was only a tool to him. You remember the messages we came across right? Those helped confirmed her story."

Jess facepalmed. Of course, she should have known that Chris would react to those messages. They had been traveling together for so long that she thought that he would dismiss it like she had. "Come on Chris! You know her reputation. She could have told you all that and deliberately left those messages to make you feel bad for her."

"But Jess, everything makes sense! Even when we fought, she seemed like she wasn't even trying. She pleaded with me to stop but another part of her seemed resigned to death. I'll never forget what she said after she had been shot. She warned me about Joseph and then…" he mimicked her reaching out "…. reached out to me. It was a final desperate plea for help. And I backed away! I fucking backed away Jess!" Chris was sobbing a bit. Jess nodded slowly. This really had affected Chris.

He continued "She basically walked to her grave. I watched her fall and I made a choice. I was going to fucking save her no matter what!"

As irrational as it seemed, Jess understood exactly why Chris did what he did. She had seen it first hand when they had traveled together. There were very rare times would she would be in trouble. The few times she was pinned down by gunfire or the one damn time she actually got shot by a lucky bullet. Chris would swoop in and do all he could to help at the risk of his own safety. The first few times, Jess kind of found it annoying as she thought it was some white knight complex he had. But then she understood that Chris really did care about his friends. He cared more about others then himself. He really cared about her. Chris would always remind her that he would have her back before they got into a fight and she knew that she could 100% trust him on his word. So perhaps it shouldn't have surprised her that he had such an emotional reaction to this.

Jess finally spoke. "You're such a fucking bleeding heart you know that?" Chris nodded, agreeing with her. Then Jess came to the realization that…..no…it couldn't be. She felt a pang of jealousy. Did Chris actually have feelings for Faith? Only one way to find out.

"I think I know the real reason for all of this. You like her." Chris' eyes widened. That confirmed it.

"W-what? How would you know?"

Jess let out a sigh. She should have known. Perhaps it was her tough exterior that kept Chris from having any romantic feelings towards her. She was perfectly fine that he still treated her like a best friend. A part deep inside her was furious that he would choose Faith over her but she was reminded that it was the best this way. He gave her all the comfort and friendship that she felt she never had, not for a long time at least. Best to keep that then to have romance potentially ruin something so important.

"Chris, I may be a cold, heartless bitch sometimes but I think I can understand feelings. You've always been one to give a fuck about others but this is to a whole new level. You were so defensive and protective of her before that it was obvious." Chris gave her a look of defeat, like he had been caught stealing. He guessed that Jess' anger was in part due to jealousy.

But she seemed to read his thoughts. "And before you ask, no, I'm not jealous. I know I'm the best ass-kicker around, with you as a close second of course." That got them both to grin at each other.

"Definitely agree with you Ms Black but Jess….there is no replacement for you and there never will be." Jess looked away feeling a bit embarrassed. That damn Chris sure knew how to soothe feelings.

"Okay, okay. Shit! She better treat you as well as you have been treating her. I might murder her if she breaks your heart." It was part joke but also dead serious.

"Jess…."

I'm kidding! Besides, with what she did before, I think the feeling is mutual." Chris nodded and there was a brief silence.

"Alright, lets get out there and let the others know what the plan is." As he made his way toward the door, Jess followed while also thinking to herself. What is the plan?