Disclaimer: I own nothing, but my thoughts of AU and OC, the rest all belong to J K Rowling.
chapter 23
"Oh! Merlin! Alive! You are so alive! No, there is no blood, I don't smell it, I can't see it either, you are healed, you are alive."
Severus Snape shook the moment he bared his mind and allowed the very first memory of the day to float upon the surface of his mind.
Often he loved to compare his mental shields with the velvety stage curtains. Those were decadent and soft to feel and were perfect in shrouding the actors' unpreparedness behind their thick drapes. Slowly he stretched his neck backward and rested his throbbing head on the surface of the tree trunk. From here, if he opened his tired eyes, he could see the castle and even the edge of the barriers of the magical creatures.
He allowed his thoughts to wander freely. His primary concerns were about the strange occurrences of these past few hours. Letting his eyes settle on the lazily swaying smoke tendrils over single chimney up Hagrid's hut, he thought, of those smokey tendrils coming out of Hermione's body. It seemed like a slimy coat of tar gathered over her skin, flowing out through osmosis from her veins and arteries. He paid attention to the fact that when in contact with opposing fields of magic those tendrils would turn into malicious vapours ready to strike at the enemy nearby. He couldn't dare to lie to himself. He had heard its beaconing call. He had felt its temptations at the tip of his tongue, on the edge of his nerves, and its seductive caress over his own magical field.
Snape could pinpoint the ominous presence of the dark magical energy. But he was thrilled to feel that unknown naïve yet pure magical signature vibrating alongside. Its innocent yet smothering caresses were wreaking havoc with his conscience. He could catalog this under magical affinity. A rarity in the magical society at present times. In theory, it was vaguely discussed, in fact, the last documented case dated about three centuries ago.
A week after his rigorous sessions with the mind master, Yūkan'na sō had conjured an oriental teapot and had invited him to drink the pale green brew in contemplative silence. Eyeing Snape over the rim of his tiny cup, he had mused aloud," Miracles don't happen on a daily basis. Neither do they happen out of the blue, Potion Master, do they?"
Snape had replied sourly," No they don't." That day Old Monk had managed to see every bit of his memories. And he had sat defenseless, watching the man skim through all of them one by one.
"You think you are living a borrowed life, do you?"
"Yes, I should have died."
"What if I say, you are not actually living a borrowed life?"
"What do you mean?"
"Magic is everywhere around us. It is in nature, in the creatures, and in human beings. Blessed are those who can nurture it, and harness its power. Often we come across two magical beings showing the same magical affinity. Both Western and Eastern schools of thought believe in soul mates because it is their magical affinity that makes them so compatible," the Old Monk paused and smiled at his patient.
"I don't have a soulmate, I never did…," Snape spat, even if he was feeling considerably calmer after finishing his drink. He looked into the small cup and arched his brow, then back," chamomile tea?"
Chuckling at the younger wizard's expense, the Japanese teacher continued," What the Scottish Witch calls a second chance, I prefer to call it a second life. I wish that you don't throw it away. It was not given to you out of pity and remorse, but out of unconditional love. It is not every day that we get to meet people whose magic vibrates happily when it comes in touch with our own. It is rather a divine cosmic occurrence. You will feel the vibration of each other's magic. You will feel it rise from the depths of your soul to the tips of your fingers. You will feel two magical fields greet each other like old friends and embrace and become one, fitting into the gaps seamlessly. And this phenomenon is not restricted to soulmates. Because Potion Master, love is not restricted to lovers."
Wandless magic was just a tiny process into this cosmic magical power. An extremely well harnessed magical core could approach its brethren magic resource. And if Hermione was trying to reach for him, it meant one thing. She was primally related to him. Not soul bound, but there must be a kinship recognized. And he was afraid to acknowledge it. He could not fathom how he would explain it to the others. What was he supposed to say to Draco? He was never a competition. His interests in one Miss Hermione Granger…How was he going to explain it?
Banking his head against the solid surface of the ancient tree, he Severus looked skywards. The thick foliage above had concealed the portion of the star-studded night sky. The wind was still wet with the flavor of fresh rain. His magical field was still tingling with the residual traces of hers. To tell the truth, he had after many long years cherished this semblance.
To his very heart, Severus Snape never lied. He was not going to commit that sin for the rest of his life. He was earnestly proud of her. Granger had rocked his confidence, lashed at his arrogance, and smashed his brutal rebukes with her resilient performances. He had watched her from the shadows of the bookshelves in the library. Always bend over some tome, scribbling her quill like a mad hare. Careless about her attire, fire burning in her eyes, a fire, that fed on knowledge.
Hermione mirrored his own zealous hunt for answers, something even his godson lacked…
An owl hooted in the night air, and a couple of them had flown over to the Owlery. Returning from their nighttime hunt, perhaps!
Severus felt overwhelmed. Simple things now jolted him. it was just one tight hug. But it had burnt him, had washed him, had drenched him, and blown him across the surface of the oceans, had twirled him, and tossed him in air. A single hug had broken his self-imposed shackles. And in their place, why on earth was he thinking of getting his hands tied with twines of Baby's Breath?
For the first time after a long time, it felt nice to give comfort to someone. It felt at home to be wanted. It felt nice that someone was concerned about him. Badly wanted him to live. Now he realized that this single girl, among the seas of faces he had taught for the last decade and a half, truly, selflessly cared so much for him and him alone that she went at length to provide him the best of the world.
Snape wondered against his best judgments, did Lily ever cared so much about him.
He drew out his wand and had cast his Patronus. Like always the doe appeared sprinting through the bluish mist issued from the tip of his wand. He kept watching it. It continued to stand patiently before him, playfully nudging at his hand, peering up at his smokey eyes. A painful whisper of "Finite Incantatem" finally canceled the spell. Casting him a longing glance the doe vanished in thin air. But those small arrangements of Baby's Breath still made him self conscious, made him gush at times with boyish desires and pleased him, to be worthy of someone's notice.
Then there were those strange words on those letters both Potter and Draco received. confused and puzzled, he clenched one of his hands over his heart and with the over her tugged that pendant hidden under his cravat. He counted his long and deep breathes. Lastly, counting numbers back and forth for several long minutes pacified his racing heart.
Slowly straightening himself, he picked up the way to the thestral enclosures.
"I got a baby thestral to thank for today's miracle. And an oafish Longbottom to appreciate for his silly determination. Melting my endless supplies of Cauldrons, mothering a foal, singing to plants," Chuckling to himself Severus had increased his pace.
He would discreetly ask Pomona about the young man's specific interests, and perhaps, perhaps, he could truly surprise his industrious and optimist Apprentice the coming Christmas. He would also have to talk with Hagrid and then prepare himself for the elusive Goblins, who were setting foot near the Hogwarts grounds from the first time after the Goblin Rebellion.