In the end, Kaidan's father had wanted to come home with him. Michaela and Kaidan helped him gather up his belongings from his log cabin. Kaidan noted that some of his mom's possessions were there too, and he packed those up as well. Their rucksacks loaded until they were heavy but still manageable, the awkward trio started their journey back down the mountain. His dad kept to himself, but Michaela asked him questions and made remarks all along the way, which actually seemed to perk him up and bring him out of his shell. Glad that he didn't have to be the one to try to make small talk, Kaidan was happy enough to walk ahead solo.

Kaidan's dad settled back in his room once they got to the orchard house, and he tended to remain behind closed doors most of the time, only reappearing for meals. One day, his dad got up and went outside in the morning. Kaidan took the opportunity to quickly check in on his parents' room; all of his mother's belongings had been neatly packed in boxes, though a few of her things and photographs still remained on the top of her dresser and their nightstands. That's what his dad had been up to.

Kaidan was pulling a couple of steaks off of the grill when his dad came back, a bundle of wood in his arms. He was relieved to see him as the sun had already gone down, and he wasn't entirely sure if his dad planned on coming back.

"What you got there, dad?" It was brisk outside, so he started to turn off the fire and head toward the door with the plate of steaks.

"What does it look like?" His dad gruffly threw the logs against the side of the house. "Getting supplies."

Kaidan was about to say something, but he bit his tongue. Better leave his father to it. He was halfway in the house when his dad called out to him.

"Got a steak for me?"

"Mmm hmm."

The three housemates ate their meal mostly in silence, though Michaela tried to make light conversation, but it didn't get anywhere. She cleaned her plate and took off; there was some sort of emergency at the clinic. After her departure, Kaidan stood up to start clearing the table and was surprised when his dad put his hand on his arm.

"The dishes can wait." Once again, his dad's surly tone was back.

"I'd like to get them out of the way now."

"Damn it, Kaidan, can you just sit down?"

Back when Kaidan was a teenager, this was the sort of thing that would trigger his biotics, and then an even more intense argument would break out. Not these days. He simply closed his eyes and sighed. "Fine."

He stared at his father, who stared right back at him. Kaidan was about to jump in when his dad finally spoke up.

"Alba- your mother- had already passed when I got up to the mountain. The unit I was in charge of got separated during a battle. We ended up in the wilderness, totally cut off from command. After the initial attack, things here on the ground quickly deteriorated. It was disorganized. We were stuck out there and decided to run recon missions, help the people. I thought about your mother all of the time… I wished I could reach out to her." He swallowed audibly.

"The last time I spoke with your mom, I told her to head for the orchard house. Away from the city, that'd be safer. When I was out there during the war, I heard that the neighborhood had evacuated the area and traveled further up into the mountains after a random attack. Our unit eventually disintegrated; everyone wanted go back to protect their families. I went up to Survivor's Ridge. I couldn't wait to see her. Judy was there- you know, from the next block over- she saw me first. They had been hit on their way up. A few had died, including your mother."

His dad's voice broke. In his usual manner, his gaze dropped to the bottom of his glass, obviously attempting to contain his emotions. Kaidan let his dad gather himself up.

"They… they had to leave her and the others behind in order to make it. They were afraid to go back. When I heard that, I gathered up a group of the guys, and we went searching for them. I… I found her. We took the- the bodies back up." His dad buried his face in his hands. "I buried her next to the others on that ledge that overlooks the lake to the west? It was the most beautiful place I could think of. Do you… do you think that was the right spot?"

Kaidan grasped for words. Frankly, he would have liked to have been there to choose where his mother was buried and to see her with his own eyes, but in times like these, you couldn't always get the chance. "It sounds nice. I'm sure she'd have liked it."

"I hope so." His dad's eyes grew watery, and Kaidan's stomach clenched. He had never seen his father cry. Ever. It simply brought home the reality they were in. "We put up crosses and wrote the names into the wood. I want to go back and put a real marker though. Maybe could you help me pick something out? And what to write? I can show you where it is."

The look his dad was giving him strained his heart. His dad had never been this vulnerable. The tables had certainly turned, and it was strange to be the strong one in charge of his family. "Sounds like a plan."

The two sat there quietly until his dad's voice whispered, "I miss her."

"I miss her, too, so much." Kaidan reached out for his dad's hand to comfort him.

"I'm sure. The two of you…"

"We were close."

"Yes."

"And now we'll have to get through this together. It's what she would've wanted."

His dad smiled a little. "Yeah." With that, his dad got up from the table and started collecting the dishes, his typical stern demeanor back in place. "I've got the dishes. Why don't you go watch the game?"

"Are you sure?"

"I am. You don't clean the dishes properly anyway."

"Alright, dad." Kaidan sighed. Back to normal already.

The next day happened to be the day that Michaela had kissed him. After she had come home from work, he made her tea and confessed to her everything that his father had told him after dinner the previous night. After some gentle prodding from Michaela, Kaidan shared with her what he was feeling, and she helped him process it. Kaidan thanked her for being a good friend and for listening to him, and he hugged her. That's when she pressed her lips against his. It was merely a peck at first, and Kaidan didn't think much of it. After a second, he realized she wasn't pulling away. Before he could react, she reached a palm up to his face, her hand ghosting his cheek. Her lips began to press firmly against him, and she deepened the kiss. His mind was slow to figure it out, and he instinctively reciprocated. He had to admit, it felt nice.

Michaela was the one to end it, backing away from him, breathless. "That was…"

Kaidan didn't finish her sentence. "Michaela…"

"What? Did I overstep? Did you not want…" she trailed off, her cheeks starting to turn a little pink.

"I mean," he muttered, trying to determine the best way of approaching the matter. "That was, you know, good and everything. Like I said, you've been a great friend, and I can't thank you enough for what've done, but…"

"But you want us to just be friends."

He nodded.

"I thought we might've had something going for us." Michaela smiled sadly. "Of course, I was aware about Commander Shepard and you, but I thought you two had split up."

"We are… we aren't… it's complicated." Kaidan left it at that.

Michaela wrapped her arms around herself. "Why isn't she here with you?"

He rubbed his neck hesitantly. "I'm giving her space."

Michaela seemed to waver for a second. "You deserve someone who's really great, Kaidan. Someone who will be there for you through thick and thin. Someone who will appreciate what you do. Someone to have a family with."

He wanted to butt in, but she held her index finger to his mouth. "That's all I wanted to say. Not saying I'm right person for you. Just saying you should be happy. And if Commander Shepard is that person for you, that's perfect."

She nodded to herself and spun on her heels, retreating from their tete-a-tete before he had even had a chance to think over her words. Once again, he was left shaking his head as she walked away.

Several days passed by. Kaidan was relieved that there was no awkwardness between Michaela and him; it was as if their kiss hadn't happened at all. He and his dad were also talking more than they had ever before, though his dad was still prone to sadness and sometimes didn't make it out of the bedroom.

Kaidan was in the middle of grabbing some tools from the shed to work on the busted pipe in the upstairs bathroom when his omni-tool buzzed once, but Kaidan ignored it as usual. All sorts of messages came his way, so it rang quite often. It buzzed again, though he still didn't check it. The third time it happened in quick succession, he glanced down and brought up the message screen. Shepard, Liara, and Shepard again. An Alliance internal emergency alert message also popped up. That was highly unusual, and he started to feel a pit in his stomach. What had happened? Was there another bombing, was Shepard – no, she had messaged him; Shepard must be fine at least. Kaidan skimmed through the text, trying to process what it meant. Joker was dead. He had been shot by a sniper during a meeting with Shepard. Someone had murdered him and probably meant to assassinate Shepard as well; she was probably the main target.

He never should have left; he shouldn't have let her push him away. He should have been there to protect her, to protect Joker. That stupid idiot. Joker had beaten himself up over Shepard's death, and knowing that EDI was no longer around, he had likely decided to return Shepard's favor and sacrifice himself to save her. The war was over, but the body count managed to climb even higher, and another member of the Normandy had joined the fallen.

Kaidan and Joker had been best buddies during the run against Saren. To be sure, they were an odd pair; Kaidan was hell-bent on impressing his C.O. and not completely losing himself in a silly schoolboy crush. Joker was all rapid-fire jokes with his easy demeanor. The two of them and Ashley made a tight group, but things began to unravel after Virmire. After Shepard's death, Kaidan and Joker had become estranged. Joker seemingly blamed himself for what happened, and to be honest, Kaidan couldn't help but think Joker played a part, too. It didn't mean that Kaidan didn't wonder if he had stuck to his guns and not abandoned ship, she would still be alive. They had been wrapped up in their own separate types of mourning and guilt, and when the dawn had come, Kaidan went back to the Alliance to resume work as normal with a new drive, while Joker had disappeared into thin air. Of course, he had gone and joined Cerberus to become Shepard's pilot again. Kaidan was well aware that Joker had cursed him after the events of Horizon, Joker later admitting that he had advised Shepard to move on from Kaidan's ass because he didn't know a second chance when he saw one. Kaidan was relieved to see that Shepard didn't listen to Joker's advice and had forgiven him. Still, there had been tension between him and the pilot; it took a series of missions to thaw their relationship and put the history in the past. He remembered what Joker said to him when they put up the names on the Normandy's memorial for the fallen… Kaidan wished he could have a do-over or another opportunity to talk to his friend, to apologize, to understand, to joke around, to play poker and get his ass kicked. Yet it was too late.

He slammed his fist against the wall, instantly regretting it. His knuckles hurt like hell, and his omni-tool had flung against the brick at a high speed, making a metallic crunching sound. That wasn't good at all. Kaidan bent down to pick it up off the floor. From the outside, it appeared fine, only with a few more scratches then it had before. But as soon as he turned on the screen, he knew it had broken. Everything was wonky. It'd likely take a few hours for him to tinker with it and get it back in shipshape.

Perhaps it was for the best. He didn't have time to waste on replying to all of those messages anyway. If he still knew Shepard at all, he knew she would be devastated… and she'd be out for blood. Despite everything, or because of it, Kaidan wanted to be there for her, and as soon as possible.

Leaving the tool shed behind, he made his way up the stairs to his bedroom, blindly filling a bag with clothes, ammo, an extra gun or two, whatever he'd need for several days with Shepard. With a grimace, he realized funeral attire would be required, so he'd have to stop at his parents' house in the city to get his formal uniform, if it was still even there. He hurried back down the stairs.

"I've got to go," Kaidan informed Michaela, gathering up some of his belongings from the kitchen counter.

"What do you mean? Where are you going?"

"Something's happened, I need to go back to Vancouver for a few days," he replied absentmindedly, trying to jam some protein bars into a side compartment of his rucksack.

"What about your dad?" Michaela's voice rose.

At that, Kaidan stopped what he was doing and glanced up. "Could you keep an eye on him while I'm gone?" He prayed she would say yes, even though he felt bad about leaving his father in a time of need and dumping him on a family friend.

She appeared to hesitate, but Michaela nodded her head. "Sure."

He took her by surprise, wrapping her in his arms and putting his forehead against hers. "Thank you. Thank you," he breathed out.

Before Michaela had time to react, Kaidan was already slinging his bag over his shoulder. His dad had wandered into the kitchen, curious about the commotion. Kaidan gave him a fast hug. "I gotta go, dad. I'll be back as soon as I can. Michaela's here if you need anything."

His dad blinked before his face set in a frown. "Where are you- ''

"I love you." They rarely if ever said it to each other, but Kaidan had gone and done it without a second thought. When his dad didn't say anything back, he didn't overthink it and just headed for the door. "Bye guys, and be safe."

Happy belated Valentine's Day to everyone. Thanks for your reviews; they definitely push me to keep on track. I can confirm that the end is (finally) in sight, and posts will now be on a weekly basis. Heck yeah!