The rest of the week was pretty normal after that. Classes were beginning to make more sense, and I couldn't drive on my new anxiety medications that Dr. Fell prescribed, so I had either Caroline or Jeremy drive me to and from school.

Friday afternoon rolled around and everyone was buzzing with conversation about the party Caroline had planned. I found myself not really looking forward to it. Usually I would be all for a rager, but what with the journal going missing and more questions than answers, I wasn't much in the mood.

"Hey, Elena!" I heard from over my shoulder on my way to History with Stefan. We hadn't really talked much since the kiss we shared, and he only stayed over that Monday night after the Grille. But, as if obligated, he walked me to most every class, unless Caroline or Bonnie were able to. As if I was a child and couldn't be left alone for any amount of time. It irritated me, but I stayed quiet, so I didn't hurt anyone's feelings.

I turned to see Lacy, a girl I had known since she moved here in the third grade, run up to me and Stefan stepped ahead as if he were going to continue walking, but I knew better. He would probably stand a few silent feet behind me and wait.

"Hey, Lacy. What's up?" I asked, trying to be as polite as possible. She wasn't treating me like a five year old.

"I was just wondering what time the party is tomorrow night? I'm so excited!" She bounced, her dark curls flopped every which way.

"Oh-uh-" I wasn't even a part of the party planning. It was all Caroline, and because we were all planning on driving up this afternoon, I really didn't know when she was telling people to come.

"Starts at nine tomorrow, Lacy." Stefan replied over my shoulder.

"Thanks, Stefan!" She called over to him and smiled. I gave her a tight smile back before turning around and brushing past him into our classroom.

I felt like a child.

Class was uneventful, and before I knew it everyone was standing in my front yard packing their things into our respective cars before leaving. We were currently debating how much alcohol to bring because I was supposedly the last person to have been at the lake house, but obviously I don't remember.

"Why in the world would we need four handles, Tyler?!" Caroline was currently trying to dig through her boyfriend's bag.

That was another thing I really had to get used to. We had all been friends since before we could remember and to see Tyler and Caroline together the way they were, kind of freaked me out a bit. Not because I didn't think they weren't a good couple, but because it made more sense than it should.

"Care. It's a party, lighten up a little." He laughed and tossed a handle to Mat who caught it stealthily and stowed it away once more.

In typical Caroline fashion, she huffed out a breath and stomped around to the other side of the car.

"I just don't see what army it is that we're supplying alcohol to." She muttered well enough for me to hear as I was stuffing a weekend bag into the backseat.

"Hey, after this week, I say the more the merrier." I laughed trying not to concentrate on the fact that I still had no memories of the past two years and failing memory.

"That's what I always say." That smooth voice ran like a hand up my spine and into my hair. I whipped around to see Damon standing there in his usual black attire with his signature smirk covering his face. Seeing him made my heart skip, and I wasn't sure if I cared.

"You're coming?" I heard myself ask.

Dumb. Now he's going to think you don't want him there.

"High school party?" He asked, cocking a brow towards me. "Not really my scene."

Of course. I'm an idiot. How old was he anyways, twenty-three or four?

Note to self, figure out how old the eldest Salvatore is.

"Oh." I said lamely, hoping that I hid my disappointment well enough.

His face contorted just slightly, but enough for me to see the wonder cross before his smirk was back. Maybe even a little more cockier than before.

"Just dropping off my baby bro." He wrapped an arm around Stefan's shoulder when I noticed him walk by. Stefan gave a tight smile and shook off his brother's arm.

"He wasn't invited." Caroline crossed her arms towards the brothers and gave him a death glare.

I seriously don't know what's wrong with this girl.

"Oh, even more reason for me to show up now, Blondie." Damon teased. Caroline ignored his comment and brushed him off to talk to Stefan about making sure he had packed for all of her plans for the weekend.

I rolled my eyes, annoyed at their banter and left to go see if I could help the boys with packing up the back of the car. But not before giving Damon a secret once over.

His boots would be ridiculous in the humidity, but they worked for him, undeniably. And I could tell his dark jeans and button down were designer. Expensive yet, understated. Even from here I could see the veins in his forearms protruding which meant he was definitely strong. Maybe he lifted weights? He didn't really seem like the type, but I've only spoken two sentences to the guy since I woke up. And already he was under my skin for some reason.

I desperately wished he was coming with us.

Before I made my way past him I dared a glance at his face, and to my bewilderment he was staring straight at me too. His eyes smoldered like blue fire, and if I wasn't embarrassed for my comment before, I was surely embarrassed for being caught checking him out.

Tactless.

I hurriedly ran over to the other side of the car to help Mat pack up the back and furiously hid my blush.

"What was that about?" Mat asked under his breath and nonchalantly as he stuffed Jeremy's bag into the trunk.

"What?" I asked feigning innocence.

"Don't play that." He rolled his eyes at me and sat on the tailgate to look at me. "You just gave him the Elena stare."

I tried to hide my laughter and failed miserably.

The Elena Stare, as Mat liked to call it, was apparently where I gave someone a once over to assess whether they were worth my time or not. He swears that I've been doing it since we were like twelve when my first boyfriend was Jack Reynolds in the seventh grade. Mat always told the story as 'Once Elena gave that look, poor Jack didn't stand a chance.'

"I did not!" I bumped him with my hip. He raised his eyebrows as if to say, are you kidding?

"Whatever, just help me with the rest of these bags."

Two and a half hours and a trip for groceries later, we were all sitting around the back porch of the lake house. I felt like I was finally able to relax and didn't need to worry about anything except having a good time, and that's exactly what I planned to do.

Caroline was taking suggestions for games, Jeremy and Bonnie were huddled on a chair together talking in hushed tones, but you could tell they were having a great time and laughing every now and then. Mat and Tyler were talking about a game from this past season, and Stefan had taken a walk down to the pier.

I watched as Stefan just gazed out over the water. He seemed so stoic and broody, but I had a feeling that was an all the time thing.

I was so frustrated in myself for becoming so attached to two totally opposite people. And brothers nevertheless. Had I really changed so much in the past two years that I would do something like this? It just didn't make sense that I would be okay with something this in between.

And it was so obvious that both of them knew about the other!

The way Stefan looked so disappointed but understanding all of the time drove me insane. And anyone within a hundred feet of Damon and I would know something is going on. I just didn't see how no one seemed to pay attention to it. That or they tried not to notice.

I stood up as quietly as I could and slipped away from the group towards the dock. I decided this was a conversation no one but Stefan and I needed to be a part of. Maybe this would also give me some insight into the past two years. Or at least, I hoped it would.

I must not have been as quiet as I thought I was because Stefan turned and gazed up at me once I reached the edge. He didn't say anything, but his expression was very somber. I wasn't sure why, but I was having major Deja vu.

When I met his gaze, I immediately chickened out on being brave. It wasn't so hard to pretend when he wasn't looking at me.

"I-" I started, unsure of how to even begin. He waited patiently, something I'm sure that he did a lot.

"You and I," I tried again, looking away so I didn't lose my nerve. "We were together." I stated, knowing well what his answer would be.

His shadow nodded on the rippling water before I heard a quiet 'Yes.'

"But," I continued. "We aren't anymore?" I finally gave up and looked at him again, moving closer, but still keeping my distance.

"I'm," He began pausing for a moment. "Not sure." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and took a hesitant step towards me. As if coming closer was going to scare me off.

"I want to know what happened." I stated.

That was a broad statement, Elena.

"Between us." I clarified.

He looked down, I assumed, trying to find the right words.

We stood silent for a while, and I listened as the water lapped at the shore and heard my friends chatter and laugh every now and then. It had gotten dark around half an hour ago, and you could see all of the stars. I forget every time I'm up here just how many there actually are. They always take my breath away.

"I met you at the beginning of Junior year." I heard from beside me. I tried to hide that he startled me, but he didn't seem to care. He was much closer now and was gazing upwards like I presume I was just moments before.

"I had just moved into the boarding house. I had been swapped around from family to family, until my Uncle Zack asked me to stay with him." This wasn't right. Everything he was saying, was too vague and almost seemed rehearsed. He was still lying. "You and I had a rocky start. At first things were great, then they got complicated-"

"Complicated how?" I interrupted eager to understand and frustrated that he was still lying. He stared at me, searching my face for something, I wasn't sure.

"My-" He grappled with some unseen force. "My family is- a little - complicated."

"Damon." I stated, quietly. His name almost burned my tongue, but not in a bad way. I saw his jaw twitch and his eyes became very hard but he only nodded.

"But I would never-" I began trying to defend myself, positive that it wasn't the case.

"But you don't know that!" He finally strained out to me. "You can't remember anything! You don't know what has happened within the past two years." It almost felt as if he was blaming me, like it was my fault that I couldn't remember anything. As if I liked being so in the dark about things.

"Do you know how hard it is to walk around knowing everyone that you care about is blatantly lying to your face?!" I yelled, knowing everyone could hear at this point and not caring. "Friends and family that I've known my entire life are suddenly too afraid to even share the entire truth of what caused me to lose my memory? And then you and your brother come along," He flinched at the mention of the two of them. "And screw everything up! I have one of you who practically can't spend more than twenty minutes away from me for some reason, but is constantly ashamed of something he can't share with the rest of the class, and the other-" I paused unsure of how to finish. I wasn't really sure why Damon got under my skin so bad, all I knew was that he does. "Doesn't even matter!"

I turned on my heel to track back up the hill with all eyes on me, I was sure. I didn't care though, I was fuming. How could they all just be so okay with pretending things are okay when they so obviously are not. Things must have really changed over the past two years.

"Elena!" Stefan called after me. I could hear the anguish and upset in his voice, but I didn't dare turn around.

"When someone decides to start telling the truth around here, I'll be in my room." I shot at the whole crowd before making it to the backdoor. Thankfully my voice didn't crack with the tears I knew that were guaranteed to spill when I got inside.

"Elena-" Caroline began reaching for my arm. I shuffled out of the way and closed the door between us.

Half an hour, and more than a couple of sips from a bottle I didn't know the name of later, I was laying on my bed, staring up at the ceiling. I was finally beginning to calm down a bit more. That or the alcohol was soothing my nerves a bit better.

Nothing was adding up. And they couldn't genuinely think that I would just accept the fact that I couldn't remember anything and I would just agree with anything they said face value! It didn't work like that. I needed the facts. I needed to know why everything was so different and what had made it so just like any naturally curious human being would.

And the fact that they all agreed to keep whatever it was from me, was beyond infuriating. It honestly couldn't be that bad, could it?

Whatever.

We came up here to have a good time, and dammit if I wasn't going to.

I rolled over and reached for the phone in my bag that Caroline just so happened to have ready for me. She had said the other one was lost in the crash and they had to get me a new one.

I started scrolling through everything trying to find some type of music app that I could play. Feeling unsuccessful when I had no music, I went to my very few contacts. I hadn't really explored the phone before, but it seemed very new to me, and a little confusing.

I only had seven contacts, which didn't come as a surprise. Bonnie Bennett, Mat Donovan, Caroline Forbes, Jeremy Gilbert, Tyler Lockwood, and Damon and Stefan Salvatore.

Damon.

I stared at his contact for a while, contemplating if I was drunk or dumb enough for a drunk dial, and thought against it. I definitely wasn't drunk enough, despite how badly I found myself wanting to hear his voice.

I took another pull from the bottle, grateful I was hardly able to taste anymore. I finally threw the phone and hopped up to turn on the stereo, hoping something fun would be in the player.

As I was shuffling through some of the songs on the disc, I started hearing a muffled ...voice? I wasn't sure. It almost sounded like a recording, but it didn't go along with the music I was hearing. More like yelling.

I turned down the stereo and started looking for the source. I opened up the window, but heard nothing more than hushed tones coming from the opposite side of the house. I could also hear the muffled voice layer over top of theirs.

I closed the window and spun around, nearly knocking myself off of my feet, and realized it was coming from my phone on the bed.

I put it up to my ear and would have been unbelievably mortified had I not accidentally gotten so drunk.

"Elena!" Damon's voice boomed over the phone.

"Hello...?" I drawled and giggled.

"Jesus, Elena. Are you okay?" His voice sounded strained, and very upset.

"Yes?" I didn't sound confident. "Why wouldn't I be?" I don't know how I didn't see before how intoxicated I had become, but I surely didn't care at this point.

"You sound like you're having a great time." Damon huffed out, I guess after realizing I wasn't in any sort of danger. I wasn't sure why he was worried I would be though.

"I'm having a wonderful time." I laughed.

"Why did you call?" He asked, chuckling.

"I-uh," I was at a loss, because I know I had thought about it, but it was only a thought.

"Elena Gilbert?" He said after a moment. "Did you drunk dial me?" I could practically see his cocky smirk written all over his face.

"It was an accident!" I laughed, not really making a great case to defend myself.

"Sure it was, you know you just wanted to hear the sound of my voice."

Hm, he had no idea.

"What?" He asked, sounding slightly bewildered. I face palmed my drunk self for voicing that out loud.

"Uh, nothing." I grumbled into the phone. He didn't press any further, thank God.

"So, what's up?" I asked not sure what else to say. He chuckled into the phone.

"What's up?" He repeated my question back to me. "Really?"

"Yeah," I said. "What are you doing?" I explained further.

"You know," He started lowly. "If you wanted to know if I was naked, all you have to do is ask." I could tell he was kidding, but there was a slight note in his voice that seemed to play in an entirely different direction.

"Damon!" I hissed into the phone and he laughed, after a moment I laughed with him.

Why was it so much easier to talk to him than anyone else? Probably because he hasn't made up everything he says to me. My annoyance flared once again.

"Elena?" He asked.

"I'm here." I huffed.

"You don't sound like it." The concern in his voice did something funny to my insides. I wanted nothing more than to see his face at the moment. Was he happy that I called? Or drunk dialed him, as he so poetically put it. He must be somewhat amused considering he was entertaining me on the phone.

"Are you coming tomorrow?" I heard myself ask. Another facepalm.

I'm an idiot.

"Do you want me to come?" He asked after a long moment. His voice took on an entirely different tone, becoming very husky and it reached the pit of my stomach, making it flip.

"Yes?" I squeaked out unsure now that I had asked.

"That didn't sound like you were sure, Elena." He chastised. I knew what he was doing, he wanted me to spell it out for him, and part of me was saying that I shouldn't, because of everyone else's reaction towards him. But another part of me wanted nothing more than to say it out loud, because screw everyone else.

"I want you to come tomorrow." I whispered.

The line became so silent, I was almost sure he had hung up.

"I'll see what I can do." He sounded almost out of breath.

"Okay," I said lamely, staring at my hands. I found myself wishing once again that he was here and I could see his face. Maybe it would give some sort of hint to what he was thinking.

"Elena?" I jumped at the sound of Caroline's voice outside of my door. I had locked it before when I had first come up here. I didn't want any one's coddling, but after talking with Damon, I found myself much calmer than before.

"Sounds like you're needed elsewhere." Damon spoke up, sounding cocky as ever.

"Unfortunately..." I muttered lowly, hoping he wouldn't hear.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Elena." I soared at the thought of seeing him soon and tried not to let him hear it.

"Tomorrow." I agreed. "Goodnight, Damon."

"Goodnight, Elena." He wished, there was a small moment before the line went dead, and it almost seemed like he wasn't going to hang up, but I heard the ring of the phone and he was gone.

I wasn't sure why, but the phone call just made me wish he was here more.

"Elena?" Caroline knocked this time.

"What?" I asked turning around after opening the door to find Caroline and Bonnie standing behind it. I heard it close after a few moments and assumed they followed me in while taking another swig from the bottle.

"Look, I know things are-" Caroline began.

"No." I stopped her. I turned around to face the both of their stunned faces. "Unless you're both ready to fess up with all the shit you've been covering up, I don't want to hear it."

"Elena..." Bonnie tried.

"No!" I almost yelled. "You are both supposed to be my best friends. And now?" I asked on the verge of tears. "No one wants to tell me the truth. Everyone is lying, including the two of you." My voice cracked at the end, leaving the room's atmosphere incredibly heavy.

"Elena," Bonnie said, making her way to sit next to me. "Do you honestly think that we would be keeping things from you without a good reason?" She asked quietly.

I didn't look up, knowing my drunkenness and emotions would get the best of me. I knew they would never intentionally keep information from me, without a good reason. I guess I had never really thought of it like that. But I also was pretty drunk, so I knew that might be affecting the way I was processing all of this too.

"Things right now are so complicated, Elena, you couldn't even fathom." Caroline huffed out sitting on my other side.

"I could if you told me." I said quietly, knowing this was a losing fight. She sighed again, trying to hide her frustration.

"Can we make a deal Elena?" Bonnie said before Caroline got out another word. I looked up to scan her face for any deception to her words.

"Okay?" I was a little intrigued. I also started feeling those last few pulls of the bottle beginning to kick in.

"We promise to tell you what you need to know, if you promise to stop worrying so much about it all. It's not doing anyone any good to have you so stressed out all the time, especially with the ordeal you just went through less than a week ago." She glanced over my shoulder at Caroline. I knew Caroline's control freakiness was probably on overdrive right now.

It didn't seem like any of this had been rehearsed and it definitely seemed as if Bonnie was being genuine. Need to know? Could I really relax after all the craziness that seems to be my life now? I wasn't really sure I had any choice, and all of the alcohol was making my brain fuzzy.

"I have one condition." I found myself saying and taking another drink. Bonnie raised her eyebrow at me and I glanced back at Caroline to see her interest had peaked as well. "Drink for drink."

Both of them let out hearty laughs and I knew everything was going to be okay.

Before I knew it, they both had opted to move all of their things into my room for the weekend and we were dancing around the room in our pj's in no time.

Just like old times.

"Ugh, we're out!" Caroline exclaimed holding the bottle to her lips and attempting to take the last drops of the nonexistent liquid.

"I got it!" I giggled jumping off the bed and down the hall.

I eventually made it to the drink cart in the living room. I staggered slightly once there trying to figure out the best bottle to choose. Unfortunately, there wasn't anything great to choose from.

"Elena?" I jumped at the sound of Stefan's voice coming from the dark of the living room, knocking a couple of bottles before I righted them again.

"Stefan, really?!" I giggled. "You've got to stop dong that."

He broke a small smile, but even in the dark and through my drunken haze, it didn't match his eyes.

"I just wanted to apologize- for earlier." He said walking toward me slowly.

"Oh, don't worry about it." I giggled and hiccuped.

"Oh?" He asked, smirking knowingly. I know he assumed that I had just been drinking enough not to care anymore about the situation, but if he only knew.

"Care, Bonnie, and a bottle of something took really good care of me." I laughed holding up whatever I had picked for the next victim.

"A bottle of something?" He laughed. "Well, it looks like you're in good hands."

I smiled. I knew in my heart at the end of the day he would only ever want what's best for me. Regardless of the secrets he was keeping. Care and Bonnie would never let him around if they thought he would hurt me, just the same as I would do for them.

It made me wonder why they pushed Damon away so hard. But the thought left as soon as it came.

"I am. I'm sorry about for earlier." I apologized. "We decided that, at least for the weekend we would forget about all the craziness that is our life and party like we always should. For old times sake."

"Well," He started, his stance becoming a bit more relaxed, as if he were planning to take a page out of our book. "I can't wait to see this."

"It'll be fun." I said. "You'll see."

"I look forward to it." He smiled.

"Goodnight, Stefan." I ended and grabbed the bottle I had come for.

"Night."

My head wasn't in great shape the next morning, but nowhere near as bad as when I woke up the previous weekend from my accident. Whoever didn't close the shades the night before, sucked as a human. Especially since I was closest to the window.

I rolled over to find that the bed had been completely vacated from Care and Bonnie. They had previously taken up the other two thirds of the bed last night. I had no idea how they were up and moving before I was, and had been so quiet too.

I jumped up and ran into the adjoining bedroom to see if I could spot my friends and found them all lounging by the lake. Everyone in swimsuits. I knew better than to think they would get in, the water would be freezing, but maybe a day in the sun wouldn't be terrible. I could definitely use it.

I skipped back to my bedroom and threw on the suit Care forced me to bring. Something bright red and small. Definitely not my choosing, but it was the only one I found. I then threw my hair up, grabbed one of the bath towels and headed down and out the door to the dock.

Care and Bonnie were sprawled out on the ground facing the sun and the water without a care in the world. Mat and Tyler were throwing a football back and forth over top of the two of them and Jer and Stefan seemed to be in some sort of deep conversation with one another at the end of the dock. Something else I'm sure I won't be privileged to hear.

A long low whistle sounded as I made my way closer to my friends. And I did a little twirl for Caroline as she slid her sunglasses down her nose and laughed.

"Apparently I don't go swimming any more because 'teeny- weeny bikini' has a whole new meaning to it now." I laughed as I layed out my towel and scooted up on the other side of Bonnie.

I loved this.

The simplicity of this moment and not a care in the world made me long for the days that I didn't need to question my friend's every move. The sun, the laughter and the smell of sunscreen dug up memories of all of us being young and coming up here almost every weekend that it was even mildly warm.

There were so many days during the summer that I would just waste away here with my friends and family.

Coming here just really made things less complicated. It even made this mess, whatever mess it was, seem far away. Like it didn't exist. Like the entire last two years were erased and it was just me, and my friends, and new friends and not a care in the world.

After we laid a while we all decided a late lunch would be a good call and headed in for sandwiches.

Everyone made various small talk. Most of it was about the party tonight and who was and wasn't coming. I didn't bother mentioning Damon due to most everyone's unjustified reaction to his name a majority of the time.

Care handed Bonnie and me a plate and we began discussing the different outfits we had considered wearing while Jer and Matt began discussing college, and grades and such. Tyler and Stefan had stepped out to do God knows what.

I was only halfway listening to the many types of shoes Caroline was listing off to Bonnie and I as I wondered why it seemed as if Stefan was always choosing to step away to have private conversations. I didn't want to believe that it was strictly because of my prying ears, but it was as if I was some unwanted toddler in the room. I would almost feel like my presents here were a nuisance, but Stefan never seemed as if I was an inconvenience.

I wondered briefly how chaotic everyone would be if I just disappeared for a few hours at the party. Would people notice? Or would there be some kind of massive manhunt? Maybe I would try it out, just for experiment's sake.

Maybe I could slip away with Damon somewhere, pasts be damned.

I smiled wickedly to myself and tucked that thought in the back of my mind, while I tuned back into our conversation about hair and makeup for the evening.