I haven't updated this one in a month, so I'm taking a cheat day and writing for this story. I'm sorry for the lack of updates on all my stories recently, I've just been dealing with stuff. Please send feedback, stay safe, take care of yourself, and I hope you enjoy!
I shouldn't have told Regina what I did in the scrub room. Even if she could read between the lines before, she was smug all day. Even with the children, she didn't hesitate when egging me on, just a little bit; not enough to be a sufficient complaint to Dr. Gold. I didn't mind her sometimes, but at other times, she would be absolutely ruthless. Just last week, she told me that 'toddlers don't get medical degrees, so I needed to leave the OR,' because I almost filed the wrong case and performed a colonoscopy instead of a tonsillectomy.
Kathryn and Emma repeatedly expressed their sympathy's, while still trying to convince me to ask her out. I almost did, until a small toddler and a man named Robin asked to see her. After a bit of investigation, she's married to him and has a stepson. I was a bit heartbroken, but I acted nonchalant when telling Kathryn and Emma about it.
Today, though, was lucky. Dr. Mills was having a good day, meaning I was having a good day, meaning my interns weren't afraid of me for now. I wasn't working late today, and David had asked me out tonight. I didn't know what to expect, but if I didn't feel comfortable on the date, I would tell him. I'm not planning on using him to get over Dr. Mills. I could do that myself.
Today, we didn't have very many surgeries scheduled, just one big one. A ten-year-old boy was getting his brain tumor removed, with very high chance of success. Even with those high chances, Regina was only going to let me assist. I still haven't performed any brain surgeries on my own yet, but I understand why; something simple can go wrong if you so much as move a quarter of an inch to where you aren't supposed to. I didn't even trust myself.
I was tasked with prepping the patient and performing his final brain scan before the surgery. The boy wasn't normally talkative, but he was so excited to leave the hospital, he told me about everything he planned on doing. He was the reason I wanted so many kids.
After looking over his scans, we prepped him for surgery and marked out where his incision would go. The interns wheeled him into the OR, while I donned my gown and scrub cap. Regina met me in the scrub room and asked if I was ready to make another child happy.
"Hell yeah," I replied. "This is the reason I do this."
"Really?"
"Well, yeah. I love seeing the patients and families happy." Regina watched me for longer than comfortable and squinted slightly, like she was analyzing me for something. Then she dried her hands and left. I did the same and pulled on my gloves as the boy on the table bounced excitedly.
"Alright, are you ready?"
"Yes yes yes!" He exclaimed excitedly, still bouncing.
"The only way we're gonna get your tumour removed is if you sit still and let the nurses help you," Dr. Mills instructed lightly. He sat still and looked away as the nurses inserted more IVs into his arm and the anesthesiologist fiddled with the anesthesia machine.
A thrilling jolt ran up my spine. I loved everything about pediatrics, but I think the neuro cases are my favourite. I snapped out of my ecstatic thoughts and joined Regina beside the table, watching him count down from ten with the mask over his face. I could see the happiness glimmering in Dr. Mills chocolate-y eyes as she looked right back at me and grinned behind her mask. I smiled back at her and turned to the now-sleeping boy.
"Alright then, let's get to work," Regina announced. "Number ten scalpel." A nurse handed her the scalpel and Dr. Mills made her precise incision.
After Dr. Mills let me finish stitching the boy's incision, Sickly, one of my interns, and a nurse took him to his room, while Dr. Mills and I scrubbed out. When Regina removed her mask, she was smirking.
"You were amazing in there! I don't know how you got all that blood under control in so little time, but you were brilliant," I gushed to her. Her smirk grew bigger and morphed into a grin.
"I know," Dr. Mills said. "I'm the reason you stay in Pediatrics." A sharp burst of laughter escaped my mouth.
"I'm afraid you're mistaken," I told her. "I come here for the children."
"I don't play a part in any of it?"
"Well, you're a brilliant surgeon, but you're not the reason I love Peds."
"Not even a little bit?" Dr. Mills's bottom lip jutted and her eyes looked big and watery. I smiled and rolled my eyes.
"Fine. Just a little bit," I said. She grinned and cackled, before drying her wet hands and leaving. I followed her out to tell the boy's family of the successful surgery.
Afterwards, we didn't have any patients, so we both found a spot to sit on while I dismissed my interns to find surgeries. Dr. Mills pulled two granola bars out of the pocket on her coat and handed me one. I thanked her and unwrapped the plastic.
"So your stepson is cute," I said to make conversation.
"Excuse me?"
"A few days ago, I saw your stepson in the lobby. He's adorable."
"His name is Roland, and he isn't my stepson."
"Aren't you—"
"—he's my boyfriend. Not my husband." Regina held up her ringless left ring finger and wiggled it in the air.
"Oh. I just thought that you never wore the ring." She shook her head and mumbled something before biting into her granola bar. We sat in a comfortable silence and watched the hospital bustle around. Nurses running through the halls, gurneys being rushed into the elevator, and doctors nearly running into one another with their case charts taking their attention. It was chaos, but it was home.
After sitting down for about a half hour, my work day was over and Dr. Mills and I parted ways to our separate locker rooms. David, Kathryn, and Ruby were in the changing room when I walked in, David already dressed in a spotless shirt and black suit pants.
"Aren't you looking spiffy," I complemented him. He grinned at me and pulled a suit jacket out of the locker.
"Only 'cause his mom washes all his clothes," Ruby chuckled. David threw his pen light at Ruby and adjusted the jacket.
"I don't have a washing machine in my apartment and she lives ten minutes away. I'd rather have it done for free then pay for it," David argued. Ruby snickered and left. I pulled out the dress I had brought for tonight: a navy blue sleeveless dress with a V-back.
"You look beautiful," David said earnestly. I smiled back shyly and walked with him out of the locker room and down the main stairs to the entrance. I spotted Regina leaving the elevator.
"See you tomorrow, Dr. Mills," I called to her. She smiled at me, but her face fell quickly and moved back to looking at her phone. I furrowed my eyebrows and held David's elbow tighter. He led me to his car and opened the door for me. I climbed in and he shut the door behind me. He got in after me and started the car, pulling away as Regina's receding, slumping form met my eyes.
David parked outside the restaurant and opened and closed the door for me. The restaurant was an expensive-looking Italian place that opened a few weeks ago. It looked fancy on the outside, and was even fancier on the inside. My wallet was gonna hurt after this one, I thought.
When we were waiting for a table, we talked about work and how we didn't like having the interns around.
"How's Hopper and the broken bones?" I asked him. He chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck.
"It's okay, but I think I wanna try Neuro. How's the Evil Queen and the sick children?"
"Seriously, you too?" David snickered and flashed me a charming, toothy smile. "She isn't evil, she's nice when she isn't pestering you, and the sick children are adorable as always."
"Lucky. I thought of trying Peds last year, but you've claimed Dr. Mills already."
"I didn't claim her. You're free to try out Peds too, there's always room for 'angels of the sick children.'"
"Angels?"
"Yeah, a little girl called me her angel yesterday when she was dosed up on painkillers." David grinned and his eyes crinkled at the corners. A waitress suddenly came out of nowhere and asked how many people.
"Just two," I said to her.
"Not us?" A voice asked from behind us. Dr. Mills made me jump straight out of my skin for a moment, before I lightened up and turned to face her.
"Are you stalking me?" I asked her. I smirked at her, but her arms were attached to the shoulders of a small boy with big dark eyes and unruly curly hair. Behind her, her boyfriend had a hand clamping onto hers.
"I'm afraid not. We haven't been to the restaurant before." I smiled and nodded, quickly turning back around and following the waitress to where she led David and I. We were sat in a corner of the room, diagonal from where Regina was sat.
David and I chatted about silly college stories, but I couldn't focus very hard when Regina was so close in my line of sight. My mouth hurt from smiling, but I was having so much fun with him. We looked through our menus and found what we were going to eat. A waiter came to take our order after little waiting time.
"I'd like the french onion soup," I ordered.
"I'd like the Spicy Chorizo Linguini," David said. The waitress wrote our order down and left in a scurry, while we continued talking about David's twin brother. Conversation came easily, even if I couldn't focus on David's face —instead watching Regina—so it didn't take long for our food to arrive. I let David try my soup and he gave me a forkful of pasta. I felt a pair of eyes on me when we were eating and figured I was being silly.
Halfway through the dinner, one of our pagers went off. I checked mine, while David checked his. I dug around my purse and felt the vibrating pager in my hand.
"It's mine," I groaned. I pulled it out and checked the small screen on top. "Shit, it's my patient from this afternoon!" I exclaimed. I got up at the same time as Regina from across the room, which means she was paged too.
"I'll come with you," David said, wiping his chin with a napkin before standing up.
"I'll take her with me," Regina said hurriedly, pulling my arm to get me to hurry. I thanked David for the dinner and apologized for leaving, before running outside with my jacket sleeve halfway up my arm, Regina sprinting in front of me, hands in her jacket pocket.
She unlocked the car and jumped into the drivers seat, starting the car immediately. I climbed in beside her and yelled at Regina to buckle her seatbelt as she pulled out of the parking lot. She rolled her eyes and parked the car to buckle her seatbelt before screeching out of the lot.
"Do you know what's going on?" I asked.
"I'm not sure, the nurse who paged didn't specify what was happening." I bit my lip in distraught thought, trying to figure out what went wrong.
"Are we even going to get there in time? The hospital is way across town."
"Good thing I'm a fast driver," Regina muttered. My mouth fell open and I turned to face her, appalled. "Relax, I was joking. We'll get there. Traffic isn't usually bad on a late Tuesday night." I nodded and rubbed my hands together nervously.
"We're you actually stalking me? At the restaurant?"
"Of course not. Why would I do that?"
"I don't know," I mumbled back.
"Frankly, I didn't know you were going on a date, much less with a man."
"Excuse me?"
"Well, I just thought that since you had told me that…"
"…Oh. No, I like both," I stuttered slightly. She scrunched her nose in thought and nodded.
I barely let Regina park the car before I was leaping out the door and running for the hospital entrance. Regina was farther behind me, locking her car.
I ran straight through the lobby and to the elevator, holding the door open for Dr. Mills. The hospital was nearly deserted, aside from a few nurses, doctors, and family members just leaving after visiting hours. Dr. Mills slid into the elevator and repeatedly pressed the elevator button, clenching her jaw as she did so. I swore I felt the elevator stall on the way up, but it didn't stop.
We both sprinted off the elevator, too rushed to go to the locker room and change into scrubs. We pulled off our jackets and threw them on a nearby gurney and asked the nurses what happened.
"He complained about a headache, then he said he felt nauseous. He started seizing before we could check him out. He lost consciousness during the seizure and hasn't woken yet."
"Have you checked his pupils?" Dr. Mills demanded from her, the bite in her voice making the nurse jump slightly.
"Yes, his pupils were dilated. We ordered an MRI scan and we're just getting ready to take him.
"Good. Where are his parents?"
"In the waiting room."
"Dr. Blanchard, talk to his family, we'll take him for his scan."
"Don't go to surgery without me," I told her, before running off for the stairwell. I didn't have enough time to wait for the elevator, and I needed to exercise anyways.
His parents were in the lobby talking quietly to each other, sleep clearly forgotten.
"Dr. Blanchard." The woman and her husband looked up and stood. "Is Ben okay?"
"He's getting an MRI done to see what the problem is, and once we find out, we'll take him to surgery. He isn't currently conscious." Their faces both collapsed and they suddenly looked years older. "I'll inform you of our progress when we get to surgery." They both nodded and sunk back to their chairs. I hesitated, before turning back to the elevator and running to the MRI.
Dr. Mills was behind the glass window, frowning at the computer and bouncing her finger up and down.
"How is he doing?"
"The scans are still loading. What'd you tell the parents?"
"I said he wasn't conscious, he was getting a scan, and I'll tell them about everything we know when we find out."
"Good." Regina kept tapping the counter until I put my hand over hers to stop it.
"Relax. Whatever this is, we'll stop it." The scans slowly appeared on screen, revealing his brain inch by inch, and as soon as the image appeared, Dr. Mills gasped loudly.
"He's got a blood clot, prepare OR 3. Dr. Blanchard, you're scrubbing in." I nodded and jumped from my chair, but turning around quickly.
"Do I have enough time to change?"
"No, you moron, he's clotting. Get your gown on and suck it up."
"But this is a new dress," I mumbled to myself before darting to the scrub room to pull on my gown and cap. Regina joined me when I was scrubbing my hands.
"We need to hurry or he's going to have a stroke, or worse." I nodded and dried my hands, pulling on my mask and dashing into the OR. Regina followed and pulled on her gloves, before hastily requesting a pair of stitch scissors l before she reached my side at the table. It was in that very moment I realized I was screwed, with her almost-black eyes staring me down, her hair tied back in a neat ponytail away from her face, and barking orders to everyone in the room.
Before she could remove his sutures, the heart monitor beeped a high noise continuously. A sliver of silence fell over the room, before Dr. Mills ordered paddles and the room erupted into sheer panic. I pumped at his chest in a rhythmic beat, while Dr. Mills still yelled for the paddles. I ripped open his gown and pumped harder, feeling a rib crack under my hands, but that wasn't important. Dr. Mills placed the defibrillation pads on his chest and reached for the paddles.
"Charge to 300," Dr. Mills shouted. "Clear!" I took my hands off his body and waited for the shock to arch his back and collapse him to the table again.
"Charging again," Dr. Mills said again. "Clear." He was shocked again, but no beat registered on the heart monitor.
"Starting CPR," I said, continuing the steady beat. My arms got heavier and my lungs constricted against my chest as time went on.
"Dr. Blanchard, it's been three and a half minutes," Dr. Mills informed. My shoulders slumped and I pumped his chest once last time before sighing and removing my hands.
"Call it."
"Time of death, 22:36," Regina sighed. All I wanted to do was hug her and say 'we can't save them all.'