A/N: The idea of writing a fic where Troy and Gabriella break up has been in my head for a long time, but during the lockdown in April, I ended up going into the Zanessa rabbit hole and I ended up giving this idea an actual shot. Also, yes, I've ended up using a lyric from Taylor Swift's new album for the title. The timing was perfect and I have no shame.

I've also already said this in the tags, but the M rating is literally just for one scene later on in the fic, which I will warn for when it comes. The rest of the fic is closer to T, so if smut isn't your thing, you could still read it!

I hope you enjoy! And if you want to talk HSM, you can find me on Tumblr at gabriellabolton (main) and bisexualsharpay (my sideblog where I do HSM fic/meta/etc).

When Gabriella imagined her high school reunion ten years ago, she had always imagined that it would conjure up mixed emotions. She had always known it would be difficult to come back and see what she's left behind, but she also knows that Albuquerque is her home, the place where her roots lie after all these years, both the good and the bad.

However, she has never imagined that it would be this difficult. She can't face her old friends, not now. She's still too broken, not ready to face the music and confront her failures.

Of course, she also has had many successes – studying for her PhD in California is not the worst future she could have imagined –, but when she thinks of the ever persistent question of how she's doing and how she's been, she can only think of him.

She can only think of the scene she'd found in front of her on that horrific day only a month ago. She can only think of his naked body lying next to someone else and the way he had looked at that other woman – his secretary, no less, what a cliché – in a way that he'd never looked at her. She can only think of the way his blue eyes were void of any emotion, void of any regret as she showed him the door.

She knows that her life is not and should never be defined by a man, but she can't help the dent that it has brought to her self-esteem. For days, she'd cried and asked herself what she had done wrong to deserve this. And she's not ready yet to face the harsh reality of her broken heart and to see how satisfied her old friends all are, whether they're happily single – Taylor, Kelsi – or blissfully married – Ryan.

For a lot of them, she doesn't even know how they are. She's heard vague stories about Sharpay from Ryan, but she has no idea how all the basketball boys are. Does Zeke still cook? What has Jason done with his life? Is Chad still as obsessed with basketball as ever?

How is he?

She shakes the thought from her head as soon as it enters. She hasn't seen him since Ryan's wedding, and hasn't really spoken to him in a much longer time.

The last time she really spoke to him, her heart was shattered into a million tiny pieces, and now the person who helped her heal has broken it yet again. How ironic.

Taking a deep breath, she takes in her appearance in the mirror. She has decided to wear a short, revealing red dress – something she would have never worn in high school – and her lips are painted in the same shade of deadly crimson, her hair up, with a few loose ringlets framing her face.

She looks good. She looks as if she's fine, as if she's not breaking inside. That's the façade she'll put on for tonight.

A part of her feels guilty about that. A long time ago, these were all her friends, the people she cared about more than anything, the ones who made this her home. She shouldn't have to hide in front of them.

Too much has changed, though. That was the past, this is now. And although the past was the happiest time in her life and she would do anything to be that person she was then again, she know it's impossible.

She can do this. She can put on a mask for one night and pretend that she isn't hurt, not by Henry the cheating scumbag and not by the fact that she's had to leave her happiest days behind. She'll dance and laugh and she'll try to enjoy the onslaught of nostalgia.

Tonight, she'll be okay.

Her room is empty.

It's not a sight she has never seen before – having moved so many times, she knows the signs of when home isn't home anymore – but it still makes her heart constrict.

There's no Christmas lights like there usually would be around this time of year, no pictures adorning the walls, no notebooks neatly stacked on her desk.

There's just a bed, and her life is tucked away in the box that she has just closed on top of it.

It hurt, cleaning up her room and putting the photos in the box. There are so many beautiful memories; some she still holds dear, others are now tarnished forever.

She has truly had the time of her life over the last two years. Musicals, pool parties, basketball games, scholastic decathlons, evenings spent in treehouses, prom, graduation.

And now it's all going to be stashed away, and soon it will be nothing more than a distant reminder of a life she has once lived.

She's excited to fulfil her dream – the very thought fills her stomach with butterflies she hasn't felt for a while – but that doesn't mean that she hates leaving this place.

She has never felt at home anywhere but here. And now that feeling of belonging is gone too. And it's her own fault for taking the easy way out to avoid losing that part of her life.

A knock on her door snaps her from her thoughts and she attempts a smile as her mother walks in and points to the box.

"Should I take that downstairs?"

Gabriella merely nods – words aren't coming out of her mouth anymore these days – and sighs a little as her mother squeezes her shoulder, her familiar and comforting scent evading Gabriella's senses, and takes the box from the bed. The door slams shut and Gabriella is alone again.

With a sigh, she throws herself onto the mattress and stares up at the ceiling. She can think of many nights when she's done this over the past year, contemplating her choices, her relationship, the direction that her life was going to take.

It's taken her a while, but she has finally made the right decision.

That, however, doesn't mean it's not a painful one.

She softly blinks the tears away that are starting to build for the umpteenth time today, and turns to lay on her side, curling up as she closes her eyes and wills away the awful thoughts and the recent memories that she wishes she could forget.

The door opens again and in comes her mother.

"I just wanted to see if you're alright," she says gently and Gabriella keeps her eyes closed as she hums, not giving an answer, and feels the weight on the bed shift.

"It's okay if you aren't."

This is what breaks Gabriella. She opens her eyes and sits up, hugging her knees to her chest as silent tears begin to fall. Shaking her head, she says, "I'm supposed to be happy. This is my dream."

Her mother gives her a gentle, pitiful smile. "It is. And I'm so proud of you. But you've also had to sacrifice a lot and it's only natural that you're sad about that."

Gabriella purses her lips as she contemplates that. She knows that her mother is right. She needs to feel these feelings and work through her sorrow, but she dreads the thought of doing it on her own, with no mother waiting for her with warm brownies, with no best friend to talk some sense into her over homework, with no boy to climb the tree next to her balcony.

"I'm scared," she whispers and her mother smiles at her lovingly and gently wipes her tears away.

"I know," she answers, her hand moving down to cradle her daughter's cheek, Gabriella sighing and leaning into her mother's touch. "But you're going to do so many great things. You'll get through this and in a few years, you will look back on this with happiness. You'll be okay, I promise. And if you aren't, you know I'm always going to be a phone call away."

Gabriella musters a tiny smile, not really seeing how she could ever get over this heartbreak. Her mother returns it, before standing up from her bed.

"Now, go get ready for bed. You have a big day tomorrow."

With a final kiss on her forehead, her mother is gone from the room and she's surrounded by silence again.

Tomorrow will certainly be a big day. It is the beginning of her life.

And as much as she doesn't feel like it, she isn't going to let it be spoiled by her melancholy. She'll push those feelings away and put them in a box in the back of her mind like those photographs.

Tomorrow, she'll be okay.

Gabriella and her old friends may have changed in the last ten years, but East High definitely has not. It almost seems like time stood still as Gabriella walks through the corridors, each step bringing back a new memory.

As it turns out, that's not so bad.

She still dreads seeing her old friends, though. Only Taylor, Kelsi and Ryan know what she's been up to and only the first person on that list knows what recently happened with Henry. She doesn't want to talk about it, but she doesn't know what she'll say when she receives the inevitable questions about her love life.

She also really doesn't know what she'll do if she ends up receiving any question from him.

Thankfully, it seems like she won't have to go through that torture, though, because as she peers around the gym – still smelly, but still home regardless –, she can't find him in the crowd.

She sees Taylor conversing with some of the old scholastic decathlon team members, she sees Ryan and Kelsi animatedly talking to the side, she sees Sharpay making out with that tall blonde director she's dating, she sees Chad trying to spike the punch as Jason cheers him on and Zeke watches with embarrassment.

Everyone is here, except him.

Maybe it's for the best, though. She really can't face him. She never can – she remembers how awkward it was between them the last time they spoke –, but especially not now when her heart is in shambles again.

She must have been zoning out, because suddenly, a soft hand lands on her shoulder and Gabriella turns around to smile at her best friend.

They immediately wrap their arms around each other, sighing contentedly – it's really been too long since they've been in the same place –, before Taylor softly asks, "Are you okay?"

Gabriella bites her lip as she contemplates this. She did tell herself that she would be okay, and the last time she did that, it worked out, so she just nods. "Fine."

Taylor narrows her eyes, obviously not believing it, before harrumphing. "He's a dick, you know. It's a good thing I live on the other side of the country, because I would have beaten him up."

Although the thought does amuse Gabriella – Taylor has always been great at putting the male species in their place –, she sighs as she practically begs, "Tay, I really don't want to talk about him."

Taylor purses her lips in annoyance and Gabriella can see in her eyes that she wants to continue, but when Gabriella sends her a warning look, she just nods in defeat. "Fine by me. He's not worth our time."

A loud yell is suddenly heard as Darbus catches Chad and chases him and his friends away from the punch, and Gabriella can't help but giggle at the sight. Some things really do never change. She's glad Chad's still… well, Chad.

Taylor obviously disagrees with this notion, screwing her face up in disgust as she watches the scene unfold. "I can't believe I've dated that guy."

"You guys were very entertaining together," Gabriella offers, giggling again as Taylor rolls her eyes. "What? It was cute."

"Not nearly as cute as you and… Never mind."

Taylor's eyes have widened at her own mistake, and as much as the thought of him, of them still hurts her, Gabriella musters a smile. "It's okay, you can say his name. It's been ten years."

And she's still not over the heartbreak of leaving this town behind.

"That's progress," Taylor remarks, raising an eyebrow as she takes a sip from her drink.

Now it's Gabriella's time to roll her eyes, before she lets her gaze once again roam the gym. "I don't think he's here."

"Maybe that's for the best," Taylor laughs. "You do not want to get into that mess right now."

"Definitely not," Gabriella chuckles, before adding with a rather bitter tone, "Maybe in another ten years, though, if I manage to find someone who actually loves me."

Of course, she can see the irony in not wanting to face the one person who has actually loved her before, but she decides not to dwell on that.

Taylor's eyebrows furrow and her lips curl down in a frown as she studies Gabriella for a moment, before wrapping her arm around her shoulder and squeezing tightly. "You brought it up this time, so I'm just going to tell you the same thing that I said ten years ago. There will be other guys."

Gabriella smiles at her friend appreciatively. She just hopes that it's true.

"Do you want to go talk to Ryan and Kelsi, see how the baby is doing?" Taylor asks in an effort to distract her friend and Gabriella sighs.

As much as she wants to see how Kelsi's doing through her pregnancy and hear about how excited Ryan and Ben are to welcome the child she's carrying for them, but something tells her that she won't be able to keep up the façade around them.

Being okay is harder than it seems when your friends are so happy.

Therefore, she shakes her head. "You go. I'll talk to them later."

Concern is written all over Taylor's face and she offers a smile as she hugs Gabriella one more time. "Okay, but please try to enjoy yourself a bit, okay? You deserve it."

Gabriella nods as a promise, and then Taylor is gone from her periphery and she's alone again. Except she's not – she's surrounded by loud music and classmates and memories.

And as much as she doesn't want to let her true feelings show, they keep bubbling to the surface.

She needs some solitude. She needs some place to think.

And she knows exactly where she can find that.

She can't say she actually expects that door that she travelled through many times to seek privacy and comfort will be open tonight, so she can't help but be surprised that is.

Maybe luck is on her side for once, she thinks – maybe the universe is willing to grant her this one moment of peace.

Once she's climbed the stairs and finds herself staring out at the stunning night view of the mountains, she quickly finds that luck is decidedly not on her side.

It's not because of the memories that flood back like an avalanche upon being here – something she hadn't thought of in her urge to get out of the gym –, but it's because she's not alone. Candles are lit everywhere, which persuades her to believe that this was planned, and a tall body is hiding in the shadows.

There's only one person who it can be.

Her breath hitching, she quickly puts away her phone, which she had been using as a flashlight, and turns around to go back down the steps in the hopes that he won't notice her.

Of course, it's not as if she were particularly quiet, her heels having clicked against the steps and her breathing becoming louder and louder with each passing second as the panic accumulates rapidly.

As such, he stops her with one word, spoken tenderly, in a way that makes her heart stop for a beat and then melt.

"Gabriella."

Turning around awkwardly and holding on to the railing to keep herself from falling over, she tries to smile, although it turns out to be more of a grimace. "Hi, Troy."

He did come to the reunion. He's here and now she's alone with him, with no way out.

She can't help but take everything about his appearance in. He's aged – there are some lines present on his face that weren't there when he was eighteen, his hair is shorter and looks more mature, his face is adorned with a slight stubble, and his lips are in a stoic line. He's still lean as ever and his cheekbones have retained that same edge. However, the one thing that she can't look away from is his eyes.

They were half of the reason why she fell in love with him in the first place and they're beautiful as ever, an indescribable shade of blue in his irises and a twinkle that reveals a kindness that she didn't realize she has missed this much.

Realizing they have been staring at each other for a moment too long, Gabriella coughs and ducks her face, wanting to avoid his eyes, for she can feel the butterflies arise just from one look. Instead, she focuses on his tie, which she notices is a tiny bit askew.

"I can leave if you want," she all but whispers, keeping her eyes trained on his chest as it stays quiet for a moment.

"No, stay. It's as much your place as it is mine."

Gabriella bites her lip as she lets those words sink in, another silence befalling them for a moment. It really was their place. The one place where they could hide away and be their true selves unapologetically, because they had each other. And having each other was enough.

And then they left East High and nothing was enough anymore.

Before Gabriella can fall back into bad memories, Troy chuckles and adds, "Besides, I'm here every day. After a while, it gets boring to be here without anyone to hold you company."

She can hear the hidden meaning in his words – it's boring without you – but that's not what causes her to look up and glance at his blue eyes, before quickly looking down again as her stomach flips. "You work here?"

"Yeah, I'm a music teacher."

She can hear the smile in his voice, but she chooses to keep looking at his tie in order to avoid being blinded by his charm. She can't help but smile too, though. Apparently, he's been able to find his calling after all, and it's something that is so completely him that she can't help but feel really happy knowing that it all worked out for him. She tells him this, and he chuckles nervously at her compliment.

She wondered if his love life has also worked out for him.

Apparently, he's curious too. "So, how's that Henry guy?"

"We broke up."

His tie is really just a tiny bit off. She could reach out and pull it straight if she wanted, but that would be weird, right?

It's definitely more interesting to watch his tie than to watch his reaction to her telling him her relationship failed.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," he says, genuinely remorseful, before falling silent again.

Neither of them knows what to say, and Gabriella hates the awkward silence almost as much as she hates that stupid tie. He used to be her home and now he's a virtual stranger whom she can't even share small talk with.

Clearing her throat to ease some of the tension she's feeling, she quietly asks him, "Are you seeing anyone?"

She doesn't know what answer she wants – it's not like she's going to get back together with him if he says no, and it's also not like she has any right to be jealous if he does have a girlfriend or, even worse, a wife –, so she feels both relief and anxiety spring up as he softly says, "No."

A moment passes and suddenly he's taking a step towards her, coming close to entering her personal space, and she immediately feels her breath hitch in her throat as she takes a step backwards.

Not knowing what else to say, she splutters, "Your tie is askew!"

Finally looking up at him, she seems him flush a little in embarrassment as he quickly tries to fix it. "Is this better?"

"You still need to put it a little bit to the right."

He fixes it again, and she giggles as she shakes her head. "Now it's too far."

She doesn't know what comes over her next, but seeing him struggle, she feels pity for him and she can't help but take a step closer and put her hands to her chest to move it to just the right place.

"There, perfect," she says with a smile, before blinking as she looks up at him completely on instinct and realizes how close they are.

Her hand softly runs down his chest and she gulps as she feels the hard muscles of his chest, his blue eyes darkening with an emotion she doesn't dare name.

For a moment, they just stare at each other, his breathing speeding up beneath her palm and her knees growing weak, as she can't turn her eyes away from his.

His eyes flick to her lips and she repeats the action, and she suddenly finds herself wondering if his lips are still as soft and tender as they were ten years ago.

The moment is over just as quickly as it started, though, as they simultaneously seem to realize what they're doing and spring apart with a gasp.

"We should go back down to the gym," Troy quickly says, his face flushing red as a tomato as his hand flies up to rub his neck in what Gabriella knows to be a nervous habit.

Gabriella feels her own cheeks heat up too as she quickly nods and averts her eyes again. "Great idea."

Before he can say anything else, she's all but running down the steps in an effort to escape his presence and the situation they've just found themselves in.

How stupid would it have been if they hadn't stopped themselves and she had acted on those thoughts about his lips. She cringes at the thought.

Yet as she hears his footsteps follow her – thankfully, he's not calling after her –, she can't shake the image of those dangerously dark blue eyes boring into her own brown ones, and her heart rate picks up at the thought.

It's just for tonight, she keeps telling herself. Then she'll probably never see him again.

She can handle a little attraction for a few hours.

She can feel his eyes on her. They have been on her ever since they came back down to the gym.

Surprisingly, she's actually been enjoying herself. She definitely needs a distraction after what happened on the rooftop, and now her mind isn't occupied with Henry, she has found herself more open to conversations with her old classmates.

Normally, she'd probably be more than annoyed by Martha's incessant stories about her children, but it provides an appropriate diversion from the fact that she just almost kissed her ex after not really seeing him for ten years, so she listens attentively.

As attentively as she can at least, while Troy is in constant proximity.

Hence, when Martha excuses herself to catch up with Jason, she can't help but almost miss the tedious stories about her children's every fart.

She glances at Troy for a moment to see him in conversation with Kelsi, but his eyes are on her. They widen a little as their gazes meet, and a small, barely visible smile pulls at his lips. She watches as Kelsi notices his distraction and looks between them, before raising her eyebrows.

Both of them turn away from Gabriella and return to their conversation, and Gabriella sighs as she keeps staring at them, an uncomfortable feeling settling in her stomach.

"Did you and Bolton bone or something?"

Blinking and breaking her stare, she turns and sighs as she turns to face an amused yet suspicious Sharpay Evans.

Gabriella rolls her eyes. "Hi, Sharpay, how are you? And no, we didn't."

"Could have fooled me with the way you look at each other," Sharpay says with a quirk of an eyebrow. "You two are still as disgusting as ever, even though it's been, what, nine years since you broke up?"

Even though it's clear that Sharpay is challenging her, Gabriella still can't help but correct her. "Ten, actually."

Sharpay hums thoughtfully as she brings the glass of wine she's carrying to her lips and sneaks a glance at Troy. "I'm surprised you didn't bring that guy… What's his name again? Harry?"

Gabriella blinks at that, her eyes widening as she realizes Sharpay definitely has the upper hand. And if there's anyone who has the power to bring her down completely right now, it's the blonde diva who knows too much about everyone and who has always been on a warpath against her.

"It's Henry, actually, and he couldn't make it. He had a work thing," Gabriella quickly states as she realizes she's been silent a moment too long, but she can see Sharpay doesn't believe a word she says.

A sly smirk growing on her face, Sharpay says tauntingly, "You broke up, didn't you?"

Part of Gabriella wants to jump to the defence, pretend that everything is okay, but she knows that that would be playing along in Sharpay's game. And if there's one thing Gabriella doesn't look back on fondly with regard to high school, it's those games that they always used to play.

So, instead, she crosses her arms and peers at Sharpay curiously for a moment, narrowing her eyes. "What game are you trying to play here?"

"Can't I be interested in your life, Montez?" Sharpay says innocently, before chuckling at Gabriella's annoyed face. "Okay, fine, I just want to gloat."

Taking another sip from her wine, her smirk grows into a satisfied, content smile as she gestures between Gabriella and Troy, who is still in conversation with Kelsi. "You and Troy were always so perfect in high school and you were always making me feel awful. And look at you two now, all miserable and pining for each other, while I'm the happiest I've ever been. In the end, I've won and it feels great."

Gabriella notices that Sharpay's eyes are darkening now, issuing a challenge to refute her, to fight her but instead, she just sighs and runs a hand through her hair. "How many times have I told you that this is a game that I don't want to play?"

There's a glimmer of disappointment in her eyes, but Sharpay hides it with a casual shrug. "Doesn't mean that I won't take the victory."

"Fine, whatever, if you want to be immature, take the win," Gabriella says with an another roll of her eyes. "I hope you know we're not in high school anymore, though."

"Do you?" Sharpay counters, raising her eyebrows as she gives one last meaningful look to Troy. Gabriella follows her gaze and blushes as she catches Troy staring at her while Kelsi is still speaking.

Sharpay catches Gabriella's blush, for she just shakes her head and chuckles. She mutters something under her breath that Gabriella can't hear, but before Gabriella can come up with a decent defence or retort, Sharpay waves at one of the cheerleaders and moves out of Gabriella's proximity, probably satisfied with having the last word.

Maybe Sharpay is right though. Maybe this was all just nostalgia, or an escape from the reality of her pathetic love life and her broken heart.

As her gaze meets Troy's one last time and he offers her a tiny smile, she ignores the flutter of her heart and she decides that he doesn't matter. She barely spoke to him tonight and the last time she actually did was ten years ago. Nothing about the moment they shared was real. He's just a fantasy, just a reminder of what could have been.

They're not in high school anymore. He's just a memory.