It wasn't until 2B woke up that she realized she'd fallen asleep. She jerked upright with a start, every sense ratcheted to high alert, yet nothing seemed to have changed.
"Morning," Popola told her, Devola was snoring softly on another cot. "No change. They're up to 11% and it's been about four hours, so it'll be a while yet."
"Oh. Thank you," 2B replied blankly. About then she realized she was still in her pajamas- just a simple over-long T-shirt. She should probably go put some clothes on before the rest of the camp woke up, yet she hated to leave 9S and their daughter for even a short time.
"If you need to go do something, I can watch them," Popola offered, seeming to read her thoughts. "I'll call you at once if there's any change."
"Alright," 2B agreed with some reluctance. "Thank you."
Glancing back one last time, she hurried across the courtyard. It was early enough that no one but the sentries were up, and they barely spared her a glance. Once inside their room, she pulled off the T-shirt and hurried into what she thought of as her new uniform: a pair of close-fitting rust-colored trousers, a long smock-like tunic, sturdy knee boots, and a cloak similar to Anemone's to guard against the elements. Folding her nightshirt, she went to place it beneath her pillow and noticed the bed was still a mess. She took an extra minute to make it, and then remembered the puddle of cold water and oil on the floor. Cleaning that up didn't take much longer. 9S was still in his pajamas, as was B9. 2B collected clothes for both of them and then headed back across the camp. She'd scarcely been gone ten minutes.
2B sat down to wait, intending to watch quietly while the upload proceeded. Despite a new fan and his torso plates remaining disengaged, 9S's core temperature hadn't dropped much. He continued to hover just under the danger line, eyes closed and attention elsewhere as he focused on transferring so much data from one point to another.
She stood up. Paced. Sat down. Repeated the process a few times.
"Everything's proceeding as normal," Popola said, sensing her frustration. "At least, both their systems are stable, and the data transfer is moving along at a steady pace. No errors, no alerts."
"Good," 2B nodded. "That's good."
"You don't have to stay. I can watch them if you've got things you need to do."
"No, I'll stay here."
"Alright. If that's what you want."
"It is."
It was not, however, what the twins wanted. After a few hours of 2B growing increasingly agitated, another android wandered in.
"Hey. How's he doing?"
2B looked up in surprise. "A2!"
"Had some spare parts to deliver and heard the news. Thought I'd check in. That okay?"
"Yes. Thank you."
A2 put a hand on her arm, gently drawing her away from where 9S and B9 lay.
"Let's go outside for a bit."
"But-!" 2B protested.
"They're not going anywhere. C'mon."
Unwilling to start a fight in such close quarters, and so close to her family, 2B let herself be dragged out to the pond and little islets immediately outside the resistance camp. A couple of machines were out fishing, or foraging for whatever they could find. They waved once and went back to what they were doing. 2B waved half-heartedly and turned to A2.
"What's this about? I can't stay out here. What if they need me?"
"The hell are you gonna do?" A2 demanded not unkindly. "You're not a hacker, you're not a medic. All we know how to do is beat shit up."
2B turned away, angry. She knew all that, she didn't need it rubbed in her face.
"Hey." A2 touched hesitant fingertips to her shoulder. "You freaking out isn't helping anyone. It's gonna be okay. They know what they're doing."
"Will it?" 2B wanted to believe it, but things had gone wrong so many times.
So many times…
"It's my fault he's in there. I keep hurting him. Without meaning to, I keep on hurting him and I don't know how to stop."
"I'm pretty sure he's at least 50% responsible this time," A2 pointed out.
"Shut up," 2B snarled.
"Hey don't get pissy with me, I'm just trying to help."
"You don't get it," 2B snapped. "I was built to kill. I was built to kill him! How can I protect him, protect our child when it goes against every line of code in my body?"
Without thought, she summoned her sword and took a swipe at A2. She dodged easily, flipping out of the way and pulling her own weapon.
"Hey, I've held that sword," A2 shot back, lunging to land a blow of her own. "I've seen your memories. I may not have lived it, but I saw what you saw, felt what you felt. I know how much he means to you."
"You don't! You could never!" 2B hacked and slashed, not trying to do any real damage, just angry and frustrated and unsure what else to do. Picking a fight was better than just sitting and waiting for the worst to happen.
"You think you're the only one who's suffered loss? Who's had to watch friends and loved ones die? I lost my whole damn unit! I killed some of them with my own two hands!"
2B was not impressed. "Join the club! 9S and I had to detonate the bunker! O6, O2, the Commander… Everyone!" She drove her point home with a vicious slash of her sword and a warning shot from Pod 042.
"No matter what I do, someone ends up dead. But that's the point isn't it. I'm an Executioner. It's what I was built for. I wasn't supposed to have any other purpose." Their swords clashed, metal gleaming in the cloud-filtered sunlight. "I can play house all I want, but it won't change anything. In the end, he'll still be just as dead."
"How many times?" A2 challenged. "How many times have you killed him? Do you remember?"
2B swallowed hard on the choking sensation rising in her throat. There was a time when she had kept count. When her memories had been consistent enough to vaguely remember the number. Now… She no longer remembered and the thought made her sick. So many bodies broken and remade, so many memories restored only to be lost. One thing was always the same. No- two things: In the end, she would have to kill 9S, but not before she fell in love with him first.
2B brought her sword down hard, anger making her sloppy. The blade sheared off the edge of A2's greatsword, making sparks fly and setting her teeth on edge.
"Do you know how many Androids I've had to kill? How many times I've had to kill the two of you?!"
That brought 2B up short, and she staggered under the force of A2's sword. "What?"
"You heard me."
She wanted to accuse A2 of lying, of playing with her, but something deep in her core told her it was true. Some forgotten subroutine of her black box, or fragment of memory copied and erased so many times it had left an impression in her programming. She had known A2 would kill her, and that it would bring her no joy. Perhaps some part of her had remembered.
Her sword arm had fallen to her side. A2 stood back, weapon likewise at ease.
"How many times?"
"I counted at least forty. Could be more, could be less. I don't know."
2B pressed a hand to her mouth, willing herself not to be sick. A2 went on.
"I've been on Earth almost five years now. I don't remember the first time I killed you, or the first time I killed him. I don't really even remember the last time. I do remember when it got to be too much. When I had to keep my distance, because I got too attached to you two idiots and your damn clueless romance. But I already knew you by then, and how your little melodrama would play out, and I didn't want to be part of another tragic ending."
A2 sighed, stepped closer.
"Death is part of a soldier's duty, of a soldier's life. War means loss no matter what side you're on. It was one thing slaughtering machines. It was something else entirely having to execute the two of you."
"We were supposed to kill you," 2B said blankly. "Why?"
A2 shook her head. "Because I was the only survivor besides Anemone, and if it's one thing YoRHa hates, it's loose ends. They couldn't control me, so they decided to kill me instead."
"But we didn't, obviously."
"No. Normally, you were too busy killing each other, but sometimes I had to step in."
"I'm sorry… I didn't know…"
"No reason you would."
2B looked away, guilty and ashamed. How long had this cycle of grief, betrayal, and pain been going on and on? Humanity was long dead. What was the point? Had there ever been a point? Why the hell would YoRHa keep making the same versions of their models if they were doomed to repeat the same thing over and over and over again? Why? She swiped at eyes that had begun to smart and then spill over.
"Hey, stop that," A2's tone was gentle, despite the bare words. "C'mon, you're tougher than this."
"No I'm not," 2B sobbed. "I'm… I'm vulnerable when it comes to 9S, to our daughter. I'm not ashamed of that. I love them. But it hurts, and I'm scared, and I'm worried instead of protecting them, I'll hurt them!"
Stepping forward, A2 folded her in an awkward hug; more of a protective stance than the soft squeeze from 9S that 2B was used to, but it got the point across.
"There's no shame in fear," A2 said quietly, one hand pressing 2B's head to her shoulder, the other looped around her back as if bracing for a shower of rubble from a bomb blast.. "Fear keeps you alive. Keeps your people alive. Gives you a healthy respect for stuff that'll get you killed. Everyone with half a brain is scared of something."
"What are you afraid of?"
A2's arms tightened around her briefly. Perhaps she imagined it, but 2B thought she felt a shiver chase through A2's body.
"...being alone."
Instinct made 2B soften and hug A2 close. At first A2 froze, thrown by the gesture. After a minute, her arms folded around 2B, her posture far more gentle and natural than before. For a long moment they stood there, trying to find enough strength between the two of them to move forward. A2 broke the silence first:
"So you gonna cry, or you gonna do something about it?"
2B wiped at her eyes with her sleeve, indignant, but not insulted. "What the hell am I supposed to do?"
"Love them. Keep going. Be there. That's all anybody can do."
Glancing back at the entrance to the Resistance camp, 2B sighed. "I should probably stay out here. The twins said they'd call me if anything changed."
"Yeah," A2 agreed. "That'd probably be best."
But that left them standing there awkwardly in ankle-deep water with nothing to do. 2B chewed her lower lip in thought.
"...do you know how to fish?"