Chapter 63: Impact
"Emily, where are you?" Hotch answered the phone, seeing her picture pop up on the screen. "You were supposed to be back an hour ago."
"Aaron," she said.
"I know that tone. What's wrong?"
"I need you to not panic."
He rubbed his temple.
"That inherently makes someone panic."
"I know, but… just listen."
"Where are you? Are you ok?"
"I'm… I'm fine, but I am at the hospital."
"What?" His voice squeaked. "What happened?"
"James is hurt… He had a seizure. Look, I want to explain everything, but I really don't want to do it over the phone. Can you come here? I need a ride anyway."
"What about your car?"
"Can you come?" she asked, ignoring his question. "I'll explain."
"Yes. I'm on my way."
"Don't tell the kids anything," she quickly added.
"How can I tell them something I don't know?"
"Tell them I'm having car trouble, but… But get here soon."
"Where are you?"
Emily listed the hospital and told him where to find her, neglecting the part where she was also a patient. He would be there soon enough and see that for himself.
Hotch, for his part, remained calm. After telling her he was on his way and that he'd take care of everything on his end, he hung up and did just that.
"Everything ok, Dad?" Jack asked, seeing his father scatter around.
"Emily's having some car trouble. I need to go help her out. I need you and Nate to hang out here. You're in charge."
"Ok."
"No opening the door for anyone, no friends over…"
"Dad, I know the drill. Everything's fine. Nate and I will be fine. Go help Emily."
"You're a good kid, Jack. If we'll be late, I'll call and have someone come over."
"Dad, seriously, I'm 15. I can hang out with Nate for a night without parental supervision. It's not the first time. Go do what you need to and don't worry about us."
Hotch nodded, putting a hand on his son's shoulder. "I'll call you when I know what's going on."
"Dad?"
"Yeah?"
"Is she ok?"
He should have known his worry would be easy enough for his perceptive son to pick up on.
"I think so. You'll know more when I do. Don't worry Nate, alright?"
"I don't know anything for him to worry about."
"I'll call as soon as I know what's going on."
"Alright. Go."
He grabbed his keys, stopping only to give Nate the same basic spiel, and took off. He needed to find out more about what was happening. She sounded… Well, she sounded worried and not like herself on the phone, and her reluctance to give him much detail didn't make it any better.
When he arrived at the hospital, he went straight to the emergency room. Emily told him to call when he got there because she didn't know if she'd still be in the same place.
"Room 104," she told him. "In the emergency room."
"I'm right down the hall. See you in a second."
Though, he didn't feel prepared to see what was waiting for him in the room.
"Emily?"
She looked up from the floor, sitting on the hospital bed.
"What the hell happened?" Hotch asked, rushing to her side and inspecting her face. "You didn't mention that you were hurt. How?"
There was a bruise already forming by her hairline, dried blood crusted around her forehead. Her arm was covered in a bandage.
"Are you ok?"
"I'm fine," she told him. "I told the doctors to just stitch me up and send me on my way, but they weren't having it."
She offered him a wry smile to show him that she really was ok, but he still wanted more assurance. First, though, he wanted to know exactly what happened.
"Care to explain?"
"There was an accident?"
"What kind of accident?"
"The kind where a car hits a tree and the tree wins…"
"You crashed your car into a tree?"
"No."
"Then I think I'll need a little more information."
"I got a flat," she started, telling him everything from the flat tire to the moment James started seizing. "It was either risk crashing into another car trying to get control or steer us off the road. That was the better option."
"Doesn't look like the better option to me."
"You should see the tree."
"This isn't funny, Emily."
"I'm not laughing," she said. "But I am alright."
"What did the doctors say?"
"That I'm fine."
"Em…"
"When I crashed the car, I was in a weird position because I was trying to help James and steer from the passenger's seat. When we made impact, I was awkwardly thrown to the dashboard. Long story short, the doctor wants me to get some scans to see if I have a concussion, though he's not too concerned, and I… My shoulder took the brunt of the impact. It's dislocated and some glass from the windshield cut it up. When they check my head, which is fine, they're going to see if there are any tendon or tissue damage in the shoulder. If there is, I may need surgery."
"Surgery?"
"It's just a warning, really. They don't think I'll need it, but they want to say for certain there's no damage before dismissing that. Besides, you missed the real show when they popped that sucker back in. It was… Not fun."
"Wouldn't imagine it would be. How are you feeling?"
"A little sore… More worried and… and angry."
"Worried about James?"
"Yes… I… I think he's been having seizures for a while now, that's why he has been so distant."
"He said that?" Hotch asked, voice raising.
"No… It's just my own conclusion. When I asked him for a ride," her eyes crinkled as she thought back, "he was so hesitant and, I guess, now I can see, almost scared of saying yes. He really didn't want to. I thought it was because he just didn't want to be forced to be in a car with me or didn't want to get out of the apartment. I don't know… I just wanted to get home to you and the boys, so I didn't analyze it. I… wish I did."
"Emily… He drove knowing he was having seizures?"
"I don't know that for sure," she said. "He didn't admit to anything. But I saw the hand tremors and he was having memory problems… He was showing a lot of the little signs that he had before they found the right set of medications for him. It didn't feel like a one off."
"Where is he? I'll kill him."
"Hotch," Emily admonished.
"No, Emily. Don't defend him. He has been having seizures and, instead of admitting that, he willingly got behind the wheel. He had a seizure while driving, Emily. You could have died. What if Nate was in the car? What if he was in the car and you weren't there to help? Nate could have been killed."
"I know that," Emily exclaimed. "But we don't know what's really going on. We don't know that he knew what was happening and chose to ignore it."
Though, she felt that to be true…
"It doesn't matter. He could have gotten you killed."
"I'm fine," she promised.
"And what is this going to do to Nate? You saw how he reacted when your car was dinged… You weren't even in the car. How is he going to act now?"
"I don't know…"
"What about Jack? He has already lost a mother. Think about what losing you would do to him."
"If you weren't practically yelling at me, I'd find it very sweet that you think of me as a mother to Jack."
He sighed and sat beside her on the bed. "I'm sorry. I'm just… worked up. I didn't come here expecting to find you sitting here, hurt and waiting for testing."
"I know. I didn't prepare you for that… I just… I thought it would be better to have you see in person that I was fine, which I am. I get why you're so angry. Hell, I'm furious… All of this could have, potentially, been avoided. I didn't have to end up here, James would have been home and fine… But I don't know for a fact that this wasn't the first time. We don't know that he knew and until that's confirmed, I don't want to react. I don't want to scream and yell and ruin the progress we've made until there are no doubts."
He knew she was right, but he couldn't help what he was feeling. James put her in danger, and to think that he did so knowingly was unfathomable.
"Hey," Emily said, reaching out with her left hand to grab his. "I'm ok," she assured him, allowing her hand to break up his fist. "We'll figure out what happened and address it, but right now, let's focus on the positive. I'm alright and James is… Well, I think he's ok. He had no major injuries from the accident. I heard the doctors say that the seatbelt caused some deep bruising, but he had no obvious signs of major trauma."
"That's good…"
"He was having a major seizure, though, so they hooked him up to the EEG immediately and gave him the emergency meds." She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. "Why is this happening? Everything was going so well…"
"Hey, aren't you the woman that just told me everything would be fine? That we'd figure it out as it happened?"
It was her turn to sigh. "I am… But… I don't know. Were things easier when I had a badge and gun?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean it feels like I've been in more dangerous and near-death situations since leaving the BAU than when I was actually an agent."
"I doubt that's true."
"It's probably not… But it was different when it was the job. None of the danger felt so close. It wasn't personal. Now, it all feels so much worse. So much realer."
"Amazing what a badge and gun can make you feel."
"I don't know that that's what makes it different. Maybe it is. Maybe I'm just different. I don't feel so invincible anymore. Certainly, I've been through worse than this, but suddenly, my own mortality… The thought of leaving Nate alone… It terrifies me."
"Another wonderful part of parenthood," he joked. "You realize that you're responsible for someone else in ways you never were. It's just hitting you harder now because you've been through so much with Nate and James already."
"I guess… I just… I don't understand why things are going wrong."
"When do we ever understand that?"
"Yeah…"
An orderly knocked on the door, interrupting.
"Ms. Prentiss, we're ready to take you for your scans now."
She nodded and turned to Hotch. "Can you go check on James for me? They wouldn't let me go with him, for obvious reasons, but the last time the nurse came by, she told me he was post ictal and resting. Just… If he's awake, don't flip out on him yet."
"I make no promises."
"Hotch…"
"Alright. I won't. I'll hang out with him and get an update, but the moment you're back, I'm here."
"Deal," she said.
The orderly cleared his throat.
"Sorry. I'm ready."
Hotch helped her from the bed and into the wheelchair. He waited for her to leave the hallway before he went in search of James, something he really didn't want to do.
Hotch found James in one of the private treatment rooms, hooked up to a bunch of wires and electrodes on his head. He was unconscious, sleeping off the seizure. From what Emily knew and told him, the doctors believe that he was having partial seizures all day. That was why he had the hand jerks and tremors. It was possible he was unaware, but Hotch had his doubts.
"You're not Emily," a paramedic said when he came into the room.
"I'm not," he agreed. "I'm her partner… her boyfriend. Aaron Hotchner," he said. "You are?"
"Sorry. I'm Brady. I was the paramedic with Emily and James. I offered to stick around when she refused to get treatment until she knew what was going on with James."
"That's awfully nice of you," Hotch skeptically said.
"I guess. I'm off shift now and need to hang around here for my roommate anyway. No big deal. Anyway, I was just going to find her, but she wasn't in the room."
"She's getting tests done."
"Right. I got an update from the ER doctor."
"Lay it on me."
He was wondering if he should say anything.
"Look, I'm Emily's boyfriend. Her kid is his kid, and in a second, I'm going to have to call home and fill in my son and their son about another accident that Emily was in and deal with the fallout. I'd like to know exactly what I'm dealing with before then. The boys have been through enough, and I need the facts before they get involved."
Brady nodded.
"He is doing alright. He didn't sustain any major injuries. Nothing appears broken, but because he couldn't verbalize any pain or discomfort, they did an ultrasound of the areas where the seatbelt bruised him. There doesn't appear to be any internal bleeding, but they will likely take some precautions and bring him for more thorough testing once the EEG is done. He had a grand mal seizure, but we administered the meds and he stabilized. Right now, they're monitoring the brain activity. All in all, they were pretty lucky."
"Thanks… for telling me. And for agreeing to wait around for Emily's peace of mind."
"She looked pretty worried. I'd want someone to be there for my sister or my girlfriend if that was her. But now that you're here, I'm going to take off. The doctor will probably be in shortly. If you or Emily need anything, ask for Betty at the nurses' station."
"Thank you," Hotch said, offering his hand.
Shaking hands, Brady responded, "Really not a problem. Wish Emily well for me."
"I will. Thanks."
When Brady left after that, Hotch took a seat on the metal stool and stared at James. He was feeling a lot of things, most of them not pleasant, but the man was suffering too. They all made a lot of headway, particularly after he and Emily told James about their relationship. They both made efforts to dispel some of the animosity.
Even if that wasn't the case, if for no other reason than Nate, he didn't wish any ill will toward the other man. The anger, though, was tricky. He wanted him to be ok, and he wanted to yell at him.
Until then, he had to check in with Jack. It was getting late and they probably wouldn't be home for a little while, so he needed to call.
"Dad," Jack answered. "How's everything?"
"Everyone's ok," he replied. "But we are at the hospital."
"I thought there was car trouble."
"There was. Listen Jack, we will explain everything when we get home."
"When will that be?"
"I'm not sure yet."
"Tell me something, at least. Is Emily hurt?"
"Is Nate around you right now?"
"No. He's in the shower. I told him to do that before we watch a movie."
"A movie we'd approve of I hope."
"Probably not, but you're not here to know," Jack teased.
Hotch didn't have it in him to lecture. "Just nothing too scary or too mature, Jack. Keep in mind that he's not yet a teenager and still has a lot of growing up to do."
"I know. You going to tell me what's going on? Is she hurt?"
"In short, there was an accident. Emily is fine," he was quick to add, "just a little banged up. We're at the hospital."
"That doesn't sound fine."
"I promise you, Jack. Emily is alright. She'll be sore and probably need to take it easy for a little while, but I saw her myself. She was in good spirits."
"Can I talk to her?"
"Not yet. She just went to get some tests. The doctors just want to make sure they didn't miss anything."
"She's really ok?"
"She is. Here's the thing, Jack. She is fine, but I don't know when we'll be home. James is also in the hospital."
"Why?"
"I'll explain more later. I don't want you to be the one to tell Nate, so please don't say anything."
"But Dad…"
"No. He's a little reactive, and that's understandable, but I don't want to tell him anything until we know everything there is to know. Emily is fine and James is doing ok, but if he has to stay overnight, which I think is likely, Emily's going to want to stay with him."
"Nate's going to wonder why you're not here."
"I know. Let me worry about that. If he asks anything, tell him that we're taking care of Emily's car. She did have a flat. If he needs to, have him call me. If we're not back before the morning, I'll have someone from the team come by. Can you handle that, or would you like me to see if one of them can come over now?"
"I can handle it."
"I know you're probably feeling worried and unsure about what to do with Nate, but I assure you that Emily's ok. I'm not sure exactly what's happening with James, but once we know, we'll explain. Alright?"
"Okay."
"It's getting late. Tell Nate that it's movie and then bed. Keep the junk food to a minimum, please."
"Got it."
"If it's not too late, I'll have Emily call him."
"I think that would be good."
"I know he'll have questions and you'll want to tell him, but please wait," he repeated.
"I heard you, Dad."
"Good. I love you Jack. I'll call again when I can."
Now it was time to figure things out. The doctor came in to check on James shortly after the call ended. After doing the song and dance and making sure he wasn't just some random person, he told Hotch the same things Brady told him, adding in that the EEG was showing signs of partial seizures again.
"What does that mean?" Hotch asked. "Given his history."
"Likely, that it's time to consider a new course of treatment. The medication we administered will keep him relatively sedated and, hopefully, prevent any bigger seizures from occurring. I'd like to talk to him about what's been going on in his life, any symptoms he might have been experiencing, and what plan has been in place with his current doctors before making any recommendations."
The doctor continued talking, but it was more of the same. Yes, he had deep tissue bruising and potentially bruised ribs from the accident, but no broken bones.
"The accident shouldn't cause too much of an issue, but the police will want to talk to him."
Hotch almost laughed. "I know."
"Has he been having seizures?"
"No clue. Last I heard, he hadn't had any in nearly two years."
The doctor nodded.
"It's possible that he has been having them without realizing. The partial seizures can go without notice when they're small tremors. We're definitely going to keep him overnight. We'll determine the rest once he's had a few more tests and we know more about what's going on."
"But he's ok?"
"He's not 100% but we'll determine if the seizure was a onetime recurrence or if it's a more regular thing and he needs his medications readjusted. I'll put in a call to his regular doctors in the morning and have them come in for a meeting. I'll make my recommendations to them and they'll come up with the best plan for him. For now, he'll be moved to a room and monitored by the neurologists."
"We've been through this before," Hotch said. "So, I need to know… Does there appear to be any brain damage?"
"We won't know until he's conscious enough for an examination and we do some scans. There's no reason to assume there is damage, but we just can't say yet."
"Alright."
"In the meantime, I suggest you get some rest. He'll be out the rest of the night."
"When do you think he'll be moved?"
"As soon as the room is ready. Should be any time now."
"Alright. Thank you."
"He'll be taken for the last of his tests before being put in the room."
One of the nurses would give him the room information and blah, blah, blah. Hotch was no stranger to the talk around. Doctors tended to give a lot of irrelevant facts that just pad the actual diagnosis or medical facts and then a lot of general things that didn't take a genius to figure out. Someone would let him know where to find James and then a doctor would speak to them again eventually. The end.
Whatever, he thought. The doctor was gone, James was out for the night, and he just wanted to get back to Emily. It was another hour before that could happen. James was taken for tests and to be moved while he waited. And he waited… Until finally Emily was brought back.
By that time, things at the home front were a little chaotic. Nate overheard part of the conversation between Jack and Hotch, and while Jack's side alone wasn't particularly revealing, it was enough for Nate to know that something just wasn't right.
"Where's Mom?" Nate asked, catching Jack off guard.
"Nate, I thought you were in the shower."
"I was. Now I'm not. I heard you say something about mom. What's going on?"
"Nothing," Jack told him. "Her car got a flat tire, so they have to get it fixed."
Nate was a little naïve and sometimes a little childish, but he wasn't stupid. He knew something was up as soon as Hotch left. His mom hadn't come home and maybe it was just car trouble, but it felt like more.
"Jack…"
"Nate. Dad said everything is fine. He'll call if something changes. I'm going to change. Pop the popcorn, alright?"
"Fine," Nate huffed, but that wasn't the end of that.
Both boys went to their respective rooms, and within the hour, the fruits of their labor showed up at the front door.
Outside of the apartment, Dave was just about to knock when he heard footsteps approaching.
"Rossi?" the voice asked.
"Reid? What are you doing here?"
"Nate called me. What are you doing here?"
"Jack called me."
Eyes narrowed in a patented Reid curious stare, he asked, "Do you know what's going on?"
"No. Do you?"
"No. Nate just said that he thinks something is wrong with him mom and Hotch and asked if I would come over."
"Jack said he needed a ride and asked me to come pick them up. Said he'd tell me more once I was here."
"I guess we should knock then and see what's going on."
Dave nodded and brought his fist to the door, rapping gently.
Inside, both boys rushed to the door to see who it was, each expecting their own visitor. Meeting in the foyer, they faced each other with narrowed gazes. "What did you do?" they asked.
"Open the door," Nate insisted. "I'm expecting someone."
"So am I," Jack said, pulling the door open.
"Spencer?"
"Dave?" The boys simultaneously asked.
"We ran into each other out in the hall. Seems we were both called over. Someone want to let us in and explain what's going on?"
"Something's wrong with Mom and Jack won't tell me! Hotch didn't answer when I tried to call him," Nate quickly said, words pouring out before Jack could even more the door open all the way to let them in.
"Ok… Let's talk about this inside."
Dave ushered everyone into the living room, sitting the boys down on the couch and taking a seat on the coffee table while Spence stood behind him.
"What makes you think something is wrong with your mom?" Dave asked.
"Jack said."
"No, I didn't."
"You basically did."
"Boys…" Dave interrupted. "No bickering. Nate. You first. Tell us what you think is going on?"
"Mom wasn't home when we got home. Hotch said she would be back before dinner, but she wasn't. She was super late and then Hotch called Jack and had a weird conversation thinking I wasn't around, but I was. I know something is not right."
"Now you, Jack," Reid said.
"Look, Nate. You're right. Something is going on, but Dad asked me to wait to tell you. I didn't want to, and, really, I wanted to know more about what was going on, so I asked Dave to come over and bring us to them."
"Really?" Nate asked.
"Yeah."
"Where are they?" Dave asked.
With a sigh, Jack responded, "They're at the hospital…"
His mumbled words were barely audible, but everyone caught them.
"Why?" Nate asked. "Is it Mom?"
"I really don't know a whole lot," he told Nate before looking to the adults. "I don't. Dad didn't say much. He said Emily was ok and that he would call me when there was more to know. That's why I called. He didn't want me to be the one to tell Nate because he didn't know how Nate would react, but I thought he should know, and we should be there."
"Nate, are you alright?" Spencer asked.
"I want to see my mom," he told them. "Can we go?"
Dave looked to Jack. "Do you know which hospital?"
Jack nodded.
"Alright. We can go, but if your parents say we need to leave, we leave. No questions asked."
The boys agreed.
"You're not going to ask dad first?"
"No Jack, I'm not. He probably has his hands full, and we both know he'll tell us not to come. Both of you, get on some shoes and a coat. There's some wind out there."
They nodded again and headed to their rooms.
"Should I call?" Spencer asked when just the adults were left.
"No. I… We'll play it by ear. If it was serious, I don't think he would have done things quite this way. We can shoot them a text when we're there."
"Ready," Nate said, stumbling into the room as he tried to slip a second shoe on, coat dangling off half of his body.
"Slow down there, Nate," Spencer told him. "Falling down and getting hurt is the last thing you need to do. Take a second. Put your shoes on properly. We need to wait for Jack anyway."
"Jack! Hurry up," Nate called as he corrected his jacket and got his shoes on right.
"I'm coming," Jack replied, walking into the room. "This is probably why Dad didn't want me to tell you anything. You're freaking out."
"I am not."
"You are. It's ok. You're scared. We get it, but you have to keep calm. Otherwise things just get worse."
Nate scowled, but nodded. "I'm calm," he said. "Can we please go?"
"We can go," Dave said leading the way to the car.
Nate did a lot of thinking on the way to the hospital. He was scared. Of course he was. He didn't really know what was happening, and the thought that his mom could be badly hurt was a constant worry. It had been less so, especially over the last year.
Everything seemed to be going so well. He didn't have to worry anymore. So, hearing that she was in the hospital hit him hard.
"Are you okay, Nate?" Spencer asked as they got out of the car.
"I'm fine. I just want to know what's going on."
"We're going to find out right now."
It felt like the walk into the emergency room took forever, and not just for him.
Inside the hospital, Emily had returned from her tests. Hotch caught her up on James before the doctor came in. The scans confirmed that there was no tendon or nerve damage, but the doctor said they would still test function at a follow up appointment.
"I told you I was fine," Emily said to Hotch. "You didn't need to worry."
"I always worry."
"I know. Me too… about you."
"I know that too."
"So, moving should be fun, huh?" Emily joked nodding her head down toward her shoulder. "Nothing like a new accessory though."
"I don't know that slings are in right now."
"A statement piece."
He sighed, taking a spot beside her, hand resting on her knee.
"This could have been a lot worse."
"I know," she agreed. "But for me, it wasn't. This isn't the worst I've been hurt, it's not the first time, and it's probably not the last, but I am ok. Let's focus on that."
"That is the one good thing about this."
"So, the doc said I was free to go. Gave me a prescription and everything. What do you say we go check in on James and then, maybe, head home?"
"Home sounds good," he said, standing and offering her a hand. "After you."
They made it out of the door before Hotch stopped them.
"Change of plans," he said.
"What? What is it?"
"Dave sent me a text. Said they're on their way in."
"In here? Who is they?"
"I imagine him and the boys. He said Jack called him and now they're on their way in."
"I thought we weren't going to tell them yet."
"That was the plan. Jack changed it."
"I really didn't want to worry Nate."
"I know. We'll handle this."
Taking a deep breath, they detoured from James' room and to the waiting area where they assumed they'd catch the boys.
As soon as they stepped out into view, Nate ran over to them, Jack trailing just behind.
"Mom," he said, stopping right in front of her. "You're hurt."
"Just a little bruise."
"Doesn't look like that."
"I swear Nate. I'm fine. The doctor fixed me right up. I wear this for a week and I'm good as new."
It wasn't that simple, but the answer was good enough.
"Why didn't you tell us? I'm not a baby anymore, and I'm not a little kid," Nate insisted. "If you're hurt, I deserve to know. You're my mom. I need to know these things."
Emily smiled and put a hand on his shoulder.
"You're night, Nate. Let's all sit down, and I'll tell you everything. Ok?"
He nodded.
Hotch led the way and Emily took the rear. Spencer jumped in front of her.
"Are you really ok?" he quietly asked.
"I'm fine. You'll hear for yourself in a second. Come on. Let's not keep the boys waiting."
Right arm in her sling, Emily took care not to knock it against the arm rest as she took a seat with the guys. Nate was watching her cautiously. She dinged their trust a little by trying to keep this from him, even if it was only supposed to be for a few hours. More than that, he looked worried and upset with her more than the situation… so far.
"What happened to you?" Nate asked the moment her butt hit the seat.
"I'm going to explain everything. Let me finish before you say anything, alright?"
He agreed.
"I went to visit your dad earlier, Nate. I just wanted to talk to him and catch up with him."
"Because I said he was being weird?"
"I just wanted to talk to him, Nate. It wasn't something you made me do," she clarified, wanting to absolve him of any internal guilt he could possibly feel. He was prone to it, and she didn't want that. "When I got to your dad's, I realized my tire was flat. Luckily, I was able to get the car into a spot, but I knew I couldn't drive home," she explained. "I figured I'd handle it later. I went to talk with James, and when I was ready to go home, I was running late for dinner and asked James for a ride home."
She took a deep breath and carefully examined Nate.
"When we were driving…" she wasn't sure what to say.
She could lie and say they lost control of the car and crashed. She could be fully honest and risk Nate feeling overwhelmed and more upset. Or she could find some middle ground… She just didn't know what that was yet.
"When we were driving, I noticed that James wasn't acting right. His hand was shaking and then he stopped responding to me." Her eyes met Nate's. "He was having a seizure."
She watched his reaction. It was like, as she explained, no one else in the room was there. She was telling her son that, not only were his mom and dad hurt again, but they, potentially, had to go through another battle with James and seizures. Last time the doctors said options after medication were limited… She didn't want to play that game though. They would wait to hear what the doctor said.
"Is he… is he dead?" Nate tentatively asked.
"No, Nate. He was driving and fearing that we might hit another car, I swerved our car off the road. We hit a tree. Your dad has some bruises, but, otherwise, he wasn't injured in the crash."
"And the seizures? They're back?"
"I don't have all the answers yet. The doctors are monitoring him now. He was given some medication and will be asleep for the rest of the night. We'll know more in the morning when he can answer some questions."
"What about you? What happened with you?"
"I'm fine too, Jack. I dislocated my shoulder. They popped it right back into place, told me to wear the sling for a week and then I can take it off. Just no heavy lifting."
"Does that mean we're not moving this weekend?"
"We certainly still are," Emily said before Hotch could say anything. "I won't be doing as much work as I normally would, but this is an important thing for us as a family. We're still moving."
Everybody let the news sink in. Emily was fine. James was too, for now anyway. Everything would be dealt with. For that, they were grateful. Though a long road was promised, they hoped to get through it all with everyone in one piece.
"I'm going to take a second with Nate," Emily said to Hotch. Eyes motioning to their company, she told him, "Convince them I'm ok."
Nate followed Emily to a more private spot for the two of them to talk.
"What's going on in that head of yours?" she asked.
"I'm mad… and sad."
"Okay… Sad because of your dad?"
"Yeah. I don't like that he had a seizure. It was bad last time. I didn't like how he treated us. I don't want that again."
"I don't want that either, Nate. We're going to figure this out as we go. We don't know exactly what's going on with your dad. It might be that this was a onetime thing. It might be that the seizures are back and need to be treated differently. Once we know, we'll handle it. We always do."
"I know."
"Why are you mad?"
Scowl back on his face, he met her eyes and said, "I'm mad at you for lying to me."
"I didn't lie to you," she said.
"You always say that a lie of omission is still a lie. You told Jack to lie to me. You told him not to tell me you and Dad were hurt. You didn't trust me to act like a grown up."
"You're not a grown up. I would never expect you to act like one."
"That's not the point," he said. "You're my mom and maybe you haven't always been my mom, but I still deserve to know when there's something wrong because I love you. I get to know these things. I'm not 9 anymore. I'm almost old…"
Emily held back a laugh.
"I will get scared and sad when bad things happen, but I'm not going to cry like a baby and throw a tantrum."
"I know that Nate."
"Then why didn't you tell me the truth right from the start?"
"Well, you're right. I did think you might be upset and react badly. Many kids would, especially when they've been through what you have. Mostly, though, I didn't know what was going on with your dad then. I was getting tests done to make sure my shoulder really was ok, and Hotch was waiting around for news on me and your dad. I wanted one of us to be there to tell you in person."
She leaned closer to him, putting her hand on his arm.
"I love you Nate. As your mother, it's my job to protect you."
"You can't protect me from Dad being sick again or from you being hurt."
"Maybe not, but I can make sure that I'm the one to tell you these things. That I can be there to comfort you when things aren't going well. I don't think you're a baby, Nate. I think you're a very strong young man, but you're still my kid. You will always be my kid, and if I can spare you a little worry and hurt, I will."
"I don't want to be lied to. If dad is… If he's dying or if he's really bad, I want to know."
"I wouldn't keep that from you."
"You promise?"
"I promise, Nate. You're older now. You're smarter, too. I couldn't keep things from you even if I wanted to."
"I don't want you to keep things from me. I will try not to be a big baby."
"Nate, I don't ever want you to feel like you have to hide how you feel. I was worried you'd be scared and concerned."
"I am."
"Yes… You are. But I forgot to take into account how much you've grown over the last few years. We've been through some pretty scary things."
"You could say that again."
"Before, I don't think you knew how to deal with it. That was why you were so upset when someone dinged my car and I wasn't even there."
He was going to interrupt, but Emily just continued.
"I shouldn't have tried to keep this from you, even if temporarily. I'm sorry."
"It's ok," he said. "Just don't do it again."
Smiling, she ruffled his hand through his hair. "I'll try not to. Now, come give me a hug."
"It won't hurt?"
"Just don't grab the arm in the sling. A hug from you could never hurt."
"I love you," he said, gently wrapping his arm around her waist. "I'm glad you're ok."
"Me too Nate. We'll figure out what's going on with your dad. Try not to worry until we know."
"I'll try."
"Good. Feeling ok with things?" she asked, checking in again.
Nodding against her body, he asked, "Can I see Dad?"
"I can take you to see him now, but he's sleeping. It's up to you, but I think it would be better to wait until the morning. I called Collin. He's going to be here soon and spend the night here with your dad."
"So he won't be alone?"
"No."
"Okay… I… I want to see him, but if you say he's ok and we'll come in the morning, then I can wait," he said, sounding very logical and mature.
In all honestly, Emily believed that yes, he was making the logical choice, but it was also that he really didn't want to be around if there was any possibility he could see his father having a seizure. Witnessing them as often as he had in the past terrified him. If he could avoid it for now without missing out on time with his dad, he would. Since he was only going to sleep for the night and it was already late, he figured he could wait a few more hours.
"Are we going home?"
"I think so."
They waited for Collin to show up, not even Dave or Spencer leaving. Once he was there, Emily filled him in, asking him to please call her if anything changed.
"I will. I promise," Collin said. "I'm glad you're ok."
Emily pursed her lips but nodded her gratitude. She had things she wanted to ask Collin, things she wanted to ask James too, but, for the rest of the night, she would let it go. She needed some family time, even if that just meant all going to bed in the same apartment, knowing that everyone was safe and sound in their \ rooms.
"Thanks for coming," Hotch told Spencer and Dave.
"Thanks for taking care of our boys," Emily added.
"No problem. Let us know if there's anything else we can do."
"We will," they agreed.
"Right now, I think we should all go home. It's late, and I don't know about all of you, but I'm beat," Emily said.
"Me too," Nate said, leaning into Hotch's side as he stood beside him.
"Then let's get home."
They were more than ready for the day to be over. They were lucky. Things could have been a lot worse. The damage was minimal, physically. Mentally, well, time had yet to tell.