Chapter 65: Transition

Hotch was ready to punch someone. He couldn't bring himself to go home when he was this angry, nor could he feasibly see himself getting behind the wheel because he knew exactly where he would end up. The results of that encounter would not have been pretty.

He resolved to take a walk.

Trying to be the bigger man, Hotch offered to deal with getting James' car out of a tow lot for him and Collin. That choice was a mistake.

He was already on edge with James because he saw Emily struggling. He bared witness to her explaining to Nate about the surgery and his dad's treatment plan. He watched the deep bruising on her body change colors. He saw her wince in pain when she thought no one was looking.

Arguably, that was all James' fault. But he was trying not to see it that way and release some of the anger.

Then he saw the car. It was worse than he imagined it would be. James and Emily were lucky to have made it out with the minor injuries they did. The whole front end was badly damaged. No way could it be repaired. Glass was missing, shards splayed all around the interior. It was a wonder neither of them had any permanent damage.

Seeing it, though, and understanding just how fortunate they really were, only incensed him. James' idiotic choices easily could have gotten them killed. It wasn't even a what if scenario. Luck was on their side when Emily acted quickly. They should have been hurt more, maybe even died. He wasn't upset that the unlikely happened but seeing just how close he truly came to losing her made him want to march over to James' apartment and kick his ass.

He had half a mind to go and do it even though he knew he shouldn't.

It was what the man deserved.

Instead, he found a café across the street, walked over, found a table, and took a breather. When Dave called him, he was reluctant to answer, but eventually picked up.

"What's wrong?" Dave immediately asked him upon hearing his voice.

"I'm going to kill him."

"Who? Jack? Don't tell me Morgan got to him. Did he get a girl pregnant?"

"What? No," Hotch stated. "He's 15."

"And?"

"And he's not… doing that."

"You don't know that."

"I do. We talk. Right now he's just… playing the field."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night."

"Damnit Dave. Why did you have to go there?" Hotch whined, making a mental note to check in with Jack about that again.

"What's going on?" Dave probed, knowing that his diversion helped calm the other man's nerves, or at least divert them.

Hotch sighed and shook away the thoughts of Jack.

"I saw the car," he said. "Emily probably shouldn't be alive. Neither of them should, but her side took more of the damage."

"It's that bad?"

"The car is scraps now."

"I know this makes things feel fresh again, and you do have a right to be angry, but Emily is fine."

"She's not fine," he argued, voice raising.

Genuinely concerned, Dave asked, "She's not?"

"I mean… Yes, she will be fine, and I'm thankful things weren't worse for her, but I have to watch her get frustrated when she can't do things she normally could, watch her in pain and refuse to take medication because she needs to get things done and the meds make her tired. She will be fine, and she gets to stop using the sling later this week, but for the next month, she'll struggle. All of this could have been avoided."

"A little struggle is better than not having her around."

"Of course, but that fact doesn't lessen the anger. Before, the thought that she could have died was more abstract. Now I see just how close of a call that was and I'm angry about it."

"What are you going to do about it?"

"Kill him."

"Aaron…"

"I'm going to go back to our new home and make sure life is as easy for Emily as it can be and try not to let my anger get to me, but I don't know how civil I'll be if I see James between now and his surgery."

"Aren't you on Nate duty? How's that going to work?"

"I don't get out of the car when I drop him off, but now that they're back at school and James is not able to be alone until the seizures are back under control, Nate hasn't been over there much. They talk on the phone and Emily is going to go with Nate on Wednesday so Nate can be with him the night before the surgery, but that's it. Mostly, Collin has been with James and Emily and I have stayed away."

"For the best. Aaron don't let this get to you. Focus on the positive. What ifs are dangerous things."

"It's more than what ifs…"

"What else is going on?"

"Nate's been… He's been distant since Emily told him that James was going to have surgery. He mostly sulks in his room and Emily gets upset. It's a cycle."

"Maybe you should talk to him," Dave suggested. "You know what it's like to have a sick father. Maybe you can help him out."

"I think he's just nervous right now. No matter what I say, he will still be nervous. Emily and I are doing what we can, but I will definitely have a conversation with him if we need to address it further. Emily thinks it might be a good idea to take him to his psychologist again, but I don't know if he's at that point. He's not acting inappropriately to the situation. He's just scared. It's something we're considering."

"You both have a lot going on. Maybe you should take her out. A date night."

Hotch almost laughed. Between cases, the boys' schedules, the move, and now James' health issues, their schedules were booked solid.

"Date night seems like something that can be put on hold for a bit."

"Don't do that. You guys are moving forward in your relationship, moving in, raising your sons together. Those are all great things, but you can't forget the little things like date night. Trust me, keep the romance alive."

"It's definitely alive…" Hotch mumbled.

"Spare me the details."

"Gladly."

"But take her out."

"James is having surgery soon. We just moved in and have a lot of unpacking to do, plus Emily's still injured. Doesn't feel like the time for date night."

"It's the perfect time. Assuming all goes well with the surgery, take her out Friday. I'll keep an eye on the boys if you need me to. It would be good to spend some one on two time with them."

"Alright grandpa."

"Watch it," Dave hissed.

"I'll talk to Emily about it. I know she's stressed. I don't know if she's up for it, but we'll see."

Though he had his doubts, Emily was surprisingly up for it. When he asked her if they could make a date night soon, she was all for it. Her one caveat was that it couldn't happen until after the surgery.

"Preferably once this is gone," she said, motioning to her sling.

Thankfully, by the time he got home and they had that conversation, the anger had dissipated, and he was able to just be happy she was there. He may have touched her a little more or held on to her a little longer, but he felt it was warranted.

"I know we have a lot going on, but I want to make sure we take some time for us."

"I will always make time for us," Emily stated. "I'm glad you suggested this. We're going to have a crazy week, but we'll get through it –"

"Together," Hotch added.

"Right. We'll get through it together, and then maybe we can do a little weekend again."

"We'll do dinner, just the two of us, before that."

"Sounds perfect."

The plans were in motion. They just had to survive the craziness. It was crazy, too. Between moving, balancing schedules, Emily's still lacking mobility, and the surgery, they had their plates full. It didn't help that Hotch and the team were called away on a case, no guarantee that he would make it back in time to be there with them at the hospital.

He made it just in time, though.

"Am I too late?" he asked, huffing as he ran into the waiting room.

"They just took him to the OR," Emily responded, gratefully walking into his arms. "Now we wait."

"We wait," he parroted, escorting her over to the chairs and sitting himself between her and Nate, offering them each a squeeze of the hand.

It was a somber room, the memory of the last time James was in the hospital floating through their minds. Nate was worried, of course, and a little angry about the situation. Though, he did try not to be. Jack and the family tried to keep him distracted.

Collin was there, too, as he should have been to support his boyfriend, but he sat away from the rest of the family. He felt protective of his relationship with James and separate from the rest of them. He wasn't really a part of their family, but he did love James. That was their common ground. He loved James and Nate, and he had come to care for Emily and her family.

Still, he needed to be away from them and their closeness. He wasn't a part of that. It was fine, but he didn't really want to be invading it. He was on the outside looking in as they waited. The surgery itself, the doctor said, could take a few hours, so there was nothing to do but painfully sit around and wait.

Nate was jittery, though, and Hotch could see that. The longer they sat, the worse it got. Hotch was about to take him out of there for some air and a talk, but a doctor came in. Immediately, they were on their feet, huddling around for news.

"The surgery went well. We were able to remove the scar tissue we needed. He's being monitored in recovery now and will be moved to the ICU shortly. Barring complications, James will be monitored here for the next 48 hours before being moved to a regular room for 4 to 7 days."

"Will he stop having seizures?" Nate asked, hopeful despite what his parents already explained.

Dr. Crenshaw, one of the surgeons on James' case, looked sympathetically toward Emily before returning to Nate.

"No," he said. "We removed only the scar tissue that was safe to remove. He still has epilepsy, but we're hopeful that, once he's recovered and we get him back on the right dosage, the seizures will go back to being controlled. He could be seizure free in that sense, but there will always be the possibility that he will have them again."

Nate just pursed his lips and looked away. Instinctually, Hotch put his arm around the boy's shoulders and pulled him closer. Whatever happened, they would be ok, Hotch silently told him.

"We can talk about it more once we see how the surgery worked for him. And Nate, if you have any questions, we can have a chat during one of your dad's appointments."

"Thank you, Dr. Crenshaw," Emily said. "Will we be able to see him soon?"

"ICU hours are almost over. They'll probably let you stop in, but it will have to be a quick visit."

"That's all we need. Thank you."

They had it pre-arranged. Collin would be spending the night at the hospital with James so if something went wrong, he could be there to inform everyone else and get Emily, who was named James' next of kin and power of attorney, to make any decisions that needed to be made.

"Everything went well, Nate," Emily told her son. "Let's get some fresh air."

"No… We need to wait."

"It's ok," Hotch budded in. "Jack and I will stay here in case there's any other news."

"Fine," Nate huffed.

Emily mouthed a thank you before they walked off. They just needed to stretch their legs a little. Nate wasn't being very talkative, but he wasn't acting out or anything. He was worried, and she understood that.

They just needed a moment to clear their heads. Both did. Emily had seen far too much of the inside of hospitals over the years as both a patient and a visitor. And though the anger she felt toward James was all but forgotten due to the circumstances, she was still confused about how she was feeling. She would always feel love for James, but there was also hate there. Sometimes, when emotions got the best of her, hate – strong dislike really – was stronger. In the end, though, love always won out because, no matter the wedge between them, he was the reason there was ever a Nate in her life. He asked her for a favor which, in the end, after a long road, became the best thing in her life.

Nate was the best thing she ever did, and he was never supposed to be hers.

For that, she would always have a soft spot for James and even for Vince.

"You're dad's ok, Nate."

"We don't know that."

"We know that he made it through the surgery and that the doctors believe this will help him."

"He'll still have seizures. He'll still be an asshole again, just like last time," Nate spat, shocking his mother.

"Watch your tongue."

"I can swear if I want to. I'm old enough now."

"That's not how that works. I'm willing to let it go this time, Nate, because I know you're worried, but don't test me."

"It doesn't matter. You know it's true. A few weeks ago, Dad was fine, and then he wasn't. Then you almost weren't. So, he had a surgery that didn't kill him, what difference will it make? He might be better for a little while, but we'll just have to do this again… and again. I don't want to keep doing this. I want my old dad back, the one that was always nice and that didn't have to miss out on things because he's sick or sad or just being a dick because of all that!"

"Nathaniel Matthew Hadley. Where is this language coming from?"

"You, Dad, Hotch, Collin, and even Jack say worse," Nate shrugged.

"That doesn't give you free reign to act like this. I know you're scared and worried, and you have every right to be, but taking it out on me isn't going to help."

"Dad was fine. Why does this keep happening?"

"Oh Nate… I wish I had answers. I wish I could make it all go away. Your dad is doing what he can to be better again. That's why he had the surgery."

"No… He had the surgery because he felt bad for almost killing you and himself. And then what? What if that happened? I'd have no one!"

"Nate, stop that. That's not true. First of all, I'm fine. But, if something did happen and your father and I were taken away from you, you wouldn't be alone. You'd never be alone."

"Yes I would."

"No. You'd have Nana and Hotch and Jack, and a whole lot of aunts and uncles who would make sure you'd be ok."

"It's not the same."

"It never is, but you wouldn't be alone."

"Can we go back now?"

"Nate…"

"Please?!"

"Alright, Nate. We can talk later," she said with a sigh.

Before she could attempt to continue, Nate was walking away, leaving Emily to trail behind. He said nothing as they headed back, and Emily didn't push him. She wanted to, but she didn't. She couldn't fight with him there, not when things were still so fragile. James might have made it through everything fine, but things could still go wrong. That was what worried Nate. The fear was getting to him, and there was no arguing that away.

He livened up a bit after seeing James. The man looked pale and ghastly, but he was certainly alive, and that offered peace of mind. Enough for now, anyway. Collin promised Nate that he wouldn't leave his father's side, and that also gave some comfort.

The surgery was done. Now time would tell what came next. In the meantime, they were tired. The day was draining.

"I'm ready for that date night," Emily whimpered as she walked into Hotch's arms at the end of the night.

Embracing her tightly, he asked, "What happened with Nate?"

"It was just a rough day," she responded. "He was snappy."

"He's been in a mood lately."

"I don't like it, but I think that's his coping mechanism. He's a little older, a little smarter, and a little more able to comprehend what's going on than he was a few years ago. It's hard on him."

"What are we going to do?"

"Exactly what we've been doing, take care of him."

The next morning, Emily called Dr. Garland and got Nate the first available appointment. It was clear that all the hospital and accident trauma had reared its ugly head again, and it couldn't do any damage to give him an outside perspective to talk to.

The healing process needed to begin again, not so much physically for them, though Emily's shoulder was still limited. It was more mentally and spiritually. They would get there, but it would take time. All their barriers had been pushed back up now that more trauma hit them. Even with things seemingly working out, they were suspicious of being hopeful.

But sometimes things did work out.

Like James woke up, cognizant and with all faculties intact, within 24 hours of the surgery. Doctors wanted to take some extra precaution because it took so long for him to be so alert, so they were keeping him in the ICU for another day, but soon he was in a regular room and on his way to recovering at home.

It was the reprieve they needed, though things with Nate weren't exactly better. Thankfully, Dr. Garland told Emily and Hotch that his behavior was normal given the current events in his life. His behavior should be monitored, and, in no way, should Nate get away with acting out, but with continued sessions to talk it out and the support of his family, Dr. Garland knew they would have Nate back to himself as soon as possible.

And when the doctor met with her, he kindly suggested that maybe she take some personal time to recoup herself.

"If it's that obvious I need a break from the mess of everything, I guess I really need to get on that."

"You can't be there for Nate if you're too stressed out or suffering."

"Hotch and I have some plans. I'll be fine."

"Good. If you ever need someone to talk to outside of your family and friends, I'd be happy to suggest someone."

"Thanks Dr. Garland, but I have a psychologist if I need it."

It was true, and some days, she wondered if she needed to go for a session or two. Life was complicated. Sometimes sorting through those webs required a guide of sorts, or at least a companion.

Her main priority was Nate, her family, and her relationship.

"So, date night tomorrow?" Emily asked Hotch late in the week.

The surgery was done, James was awake, and so, it was time to focus on them again.

"Absolutely. Me, you, and a quiet evening sounds like just what the doctor ordered."

"What about the boys?"

"Your mom is going to take Nate for the weekend. Jack is going to spend a day there but has plans with friends."

"You're telling me that we have a free weekend? Me, you, no work, no kids?"

"That is the plan."

"Heaven."

"You say that, but you'll miss the boys after an hour without them."

"I'll miss them, sure, but I'll be happy for the time with you."

"It's been a while since we've had a romantic night out."

"Got anything planned?"

"I've got so many things planned," he said, pulling her to him, chest to chest, her back arched away so she could see his face. "Tomorrow evening, after work, we're going to that fancy little Mediterranean place you've been wanting to try. Then we'll have a quiet evening, just the two of us with no interruptions."

"I'm so looking forward to it."

"Me too."

He leaned over and kissed her. "Come on," he said. "Dinner's waiting. The boys cooked."

"The boys cooked?"

"I know. I was worried too, but it's edible. Pasta is pretty hard to mess up, but it's good to know they won't be completely helpless when they're off on their own."

"Nate always enjoyed cooking with me, but he was, by no means, a master chef."

"Jack has been known to burn cookies."

"Well, let's see how this all tastes then. At the very least, it was sweet of them."

"I think so, and I promise it's safe to eat."

"I'm sure we'll choke it down even if it isn't."

"We're excellent parents."

"The best," Emily agreed, cozying up to his side as they headed into the dining room. The boys had the table set, food on the table, and smiles on their faces. It was a nice change, and the food was good. The pasta was cooked, and the sauce was from a jar and delicious.

"Dinner was a nice surprise. What made you do it?"

"I was mean," Nate said.

"And I thought it would be nice," Jack added.

"Better not spoil us. We might get used to it."

Jack was quick to say that it wouldn't be a regular thing. It wasn't often that they didn't have after school activities or something going on. Still, they took some time away from everything because it was a long, hard week for the family. Between the accident, the move, and everything with James, their parents had a lot on their plates. Boiling some pasta, slathering it in sauce, and calling it a home cooked meal was the least they could do.

"We were going to order out, but we cooked."

"And we thank you. It was very nice."

The parents were grateful. They had good kids, and it was nice of them to surprise them like that. Emily had the suspicion that, indirectly, Dr. Garland had something to do with it, but she wasn't going to question it. It was a break to their normal routine, and it offered comfort.

"Tomorrow you're going to Nana's. Can you make sure you have a weekend bag packed tonight? She's going to be here when you get home."

"Am I going to get to see Dad?" Nate asked.

"Yes. Nana is going to take you to the hospital to see him Saturday morning."

"Alright."

The family worked out their weekend plans, but Emily was grateful for the upcoming break. She loved being a mother to Nate and Jack, but the constant worry and drama over the last few years were finally taking their toll. She needed an adult only vacation… Or at least a night.

So when her mother came the next afternoon and the two sat down for some coffee while they waited for school to let out, it was nice to vent to someone who knew the old James and who wasn't Hotch. Talking with Hotch was easy, but he was always on her side. She needed her mother's objectivity and diplomacy, though, she wasn't getting much of that.

Elizabeth only had part of the story. Emily was hurt, but Emily said it was just some bruises, and it was an accident. She didn't, until then, know that James' inability to seek help and face his medical issues were the cause of said accident or that all of it could have been avoided.

Of course, it made her angry and sad. James put her daughter in jeopardy and her grandson on the track for more pain. But she knew her daughter more now, and she knew Emily would learn to forgive him. She always would, so, to keep the peace, Elizabeth would also find a way to not dwell. She would feel her anger, but she would let it go before she had to interact with James until or unless he did something else to make her angry. Then all bets were off.

"I'm just so glad you're ok and that he's doing well after the surgery. Tell me more about how Nate's been."

Emily explained what was happening. Nate had a short fuse these days. It had been getting better since he saw Dr. Garland, and he wasn't acting out much, but they could see he was stressed and worried. She just wanted to give her mother the same tools that Dr. Garland gave them to deal with it.

"We just don't want him living in a constant state of anxiety. The problem is that he knows loss and he knows how bad the situation can be with James' seizures, so we can't just tell him things will be ok. All we can do is make him feel that and give it time."

"You know, when you were a kid and you felt things, anxiety or fear, you acted out in your own way."

"I'm sure I did."

"No. I don't think you understand. Even when you were terrified, you ran at what it was that scared you. You refused to hold onto that feeling. It got you into a lot of trouble, but it is something I also admired about you. You always had that spirit about you."

"Thanks?"

"It's a good thing. I used to think I disliked that about you – No, let me reword that. I used to wish that it was different because dealing with that caused a lot of headaches over the years. It's only in hindsight that I'm grateful it never changed."

"Why?"

"Because that quality is what helped you survive. Your father and I weren't the best parents. We certainly weren't the worst, and we truly did and do love you, but we weren't attentive, and we created an unreliability in your life. You were in a constant state of fear and change. If you weren't the way you were, you would have been paralyzed by that fear, stuck and unable to function. Instead, your strength and resilience pushed you forward. So I'm incredibly thankful you were the way you were."

"That might be one of the nicest things you've said to me."

"Well, then that speaks poorly of my role as your mother, but it doesn't make it any less true."

"Thanks. You know, I'm really happy with the place we're in," Emily said, segueing the conversation. "For so long, our relationship was so contentious and forced. I don't know if it was Nate that brought us together and forced aside our issues, but I'm glad it happened."

"Me too, Dear. But I don't think it was just because of Nate. Maybe you being in trouble and learning I had a grandson was a part of it, but I just saw how caring and wonderful you were all over again… You are good at your job, and, while I had different career aspirations for you, I can't fault you for doing something that makes you feel fulfilled, so I let go of my own aspirations and hung onto yours."

"I'm a professor now. That has to be more in line with your expectations."

"Yes, but I wouldn't care if you were a supermarket clerk. Your career choice was about Nate. Admirable, selfless, and still a way to do something you enjoy. Most importantly, you're there for your son when he needs you. That's a balance I never quite found."

"We don't have to go there again, Mother. The past is the past. It's not worth going over it all the time. Nothing will change, but we've moved past it all. I've realized that – Well, I was never supposed to be a part of Nate's life. Not in any real way. Biologically, he was always a part of me, but I wasn't his mother. I walked away from my kid."

"That's not…"

"I know that's an oversimplified version of events, but the truth is that I wasn't there for him. I wasn't meant to be, but I felt the pain of that every day. Now that he's in my life, and I have a better sense of what I've missed, that feeling's worse. But it helps me understand some of what you might have felt. You weren't there for me a lot when I was little. Your job kept you away, sometimes not by choice. So, that had to hurt you too, I think."

"It did, Emily. It did."

"I understand that in a way I didn't before, which is why I let go of some of the hurt feelings. I'm not holding a grudge or sweeping anything under the rug to combust at a later day. I just… Understand better."

"I wish you didn't."

"I know. Me too, but I do. In the end, I can't be upset about it. I got attached when I knew I shouldn't and then I was forced out. It is what it is now. It helped us, though. I learned that when I needed you, if I called, you'd come."

"I would always."

"I wouldn't have always believed that, but I do now. We're in the best place we've been in since I was old enough to understand things."

"I'm happy for that."

"Me too."

They heard someone approaching the front of the house.

"Wow, it's already that late. The boys are home."

"Time just slips away with good conversation," Elizabeth said.

"Apparently so."

Emily smiled and got up to greet the boys. Both young men were happy to see their grandmother. Jack, despite his newfound teen independence, still loved seeing the extended family on occasion. Elizabeth had become as much his Nana as Nate's, and he wasn't one to turn away from family.

Knowing that Hotch would be home any minute, Elizabeth pushed the boys along to get them out of there. She wanted her daughter to have as much time with just Hotch as she could. Soon they were on their way, Emily telling them to enjoy, but behave.

"Same goes for you, Dear," Elizabeth teased.

"Bye Mom. Call if you need us."

"We won't need you, but I'm sure you'll be checking in anyway."

That was a given, but she almost felt guilty about the sense of relief she got when the house was empty. Falling into the couch cushions, Emily soaked in the quiet. The last few weeks had been another whirlwind of crazy.

That spot was exactly where Hotch found her, sound asleep, when he got home.

"Emily," he gently coaxed. "Wake up sleepy head."

"Hotch?" she asked, eyes unopened.

"Yeah. You looked so beautiful asleep, I almost didn't want to wake you."

Her eyes popped open. "No… You had to. We have plans, and I really need to get ready."

"We have a little time. I want to grab a shower and change."

"Me too."

"See, we'll be starting this weekend off right."

He had something special planned for them, and he was ready to get that started. A little fun never hurt, and fun was had, but once they were dressed and ready, it was time to get the evening truly started. Step one, true relaxation.

The restaurant was just what Emily hoped it would be, a little more formal than she wanted for a quiet night, but the food and wine more than made up for the little extra effort that went into getting ready. And that was only part one of the evening.

After dinner, Hotch took her to the movies.

"I wanted to do something to help you relax and thought about the spa, but a couple's message with your shoulder didn't seem like a great idea."

"Probably not."

Emily didn't mind the change in plans. It had been months since they watched something tailored only to them and not the kids. Cozying up next to each other and making out like teenagers high on hormones didn't hurt either.

"Home next?"

"Not quite."

"No? Where are we going?"

"As much as I love our new home, I thought we deserved a treat. So, we're spending the night in a fancy hotel where we can wake up to room service and not have to worry about making the bed. Then we have another easy, fun day planned."

"You've truly become quite the romantic. I'm still not used to it."

"We've made each other a little soft. It's our little secret."

"I meant what I said when this all began. You don't need to do these grand sweeping gestures to win me over or show you love me. I'm already swept up and I definitely love you."

"Good to know," he said, placing a kiss at the edge of her lips. "But every once in a while, it's nice to show you I can do these things. You show me by doing a lot of little things for me all the time without ever expecting a thank you or any acknowledgment at all or by not complaining when cases take me away… Those types of things. You're not really a person who asks for a lot, so I like to do things like this, things you don't necessarily need or want all the time, but enjoy all the same."

"Well then, Mr. Hotchner, let's enjoy our weekend."

The hotel was luxurious and cozy. They spent the next day in bed, spending time with each other and enjoying cuddling while watching tv. It was simple and nothing they couldn't have done anywhere, but it was perfect.

Come that afternoon, after checking on the boys, Hotch had the biggest part of the weekend to look forward to. Step two of his plan was in motion.

"Another surprise?" Emily asked.

"Yes."

"I suppose you're not going to tell me anything?"

"I'll tell you that we're going back in time a bit."

"You've invented time travel? Now I'm invested."

"You weren't before?"

"A different kind of invested," she clarified.

"Let's hope," he whispered.

"What?"

"Nothing. You'll like this. I promise."

"I trust you," she said, hand reaching over the center counsel to rest on his leg. "I tend to like your surprises."

This one would be no different.

She didn't ask any questions about their destination as they drove. Instead, she talked about their summer vacation plans and took in the scenery, getting a sense of déjà vu.

"Why does this drive seem vaguely familiar?"

"We're in Virginia."

"So I see. Looks like we're heading to West Virginia."

"Alright, Agent," Hotch said. "Putting those sleuthing skills to good use. Where are we going in West Virginia?"

"No more clues?" she asked, continually looking around.

"I gave you all you need."

Emily surveyed the area, waiting for the one clue that would put things together. It didn't take long for it to come. A literal sign showed her exactly where they were going.

"We're going to Harpers Ferry?"

He smiled and briefly took his eyes off the road to look at her.

"You remember Harpers Ferry?" she asked.

"It was where we met, after all."

"Barely. We said one sentence to each other."

The Prentiss family had recently moved back into their Virginia home front. Elizabeth's postings left Emily to fend for herself a lot during the tail end of high school, but had brought her mother back to the states and, with it, she insisted on Emily's presence for the entire summer before she went off to school.

Emily hadn't been in the estate they lived in with her father for any extended period since he passed away, except for when they moved back briefly when she was 16 and started at the school where she met James. Soon after her father's death, Elizabeth began taking more frequent postings overseas. They country hopped every few months for years until her grandfather put his foot down and made Elizabeth bring Emily to the states to finish her last years of high school, but that wasn't in this home, it was in the house they bought to escape from the memories.

Even so, she certainly hadn't spent time there with her mother and her new boyfriend. Emily wasn't looking forward to her final summer before college being spent with Elizabeth and Todd, who she claimed was just a friend visiting. Because friends moved in all the time…

It was hostile from the get-go. Elizabeth just barely showed up in time for Emily's graduation. Naturally, Elizabeth had something to say about her valedictorian speech. Emily's response was to disappear and show up the following week much to Elizabeth's chagrin.

When she showed up, the house was crawling with new staff. For most of them, she figured, it wasn't even worth learning their names.

"So you decided to show up," Elizabeth greeted her daughter. "Where the hell have you been?"

"With friends."

"Emily!"

"I'm fine, and I'm here. What more do you want from me?"

"An explanation!"

"I gave one, and that's as good as it gets. I'll be in my room," she said, pushing past her mother and rushing to her old bedroom.

She really didn't want to run into Todd or anyone else.

"Todd and I expect you for dinner at 7," Elizabeth yelled.

"I won't be there," Emily yelled back.

Things didn't get better after that. The time she was forced to spend with her mother and Todd was awkward. Seeing him touch her father's things and act like he was the man of the house just set her on fire. It didn't help that she was surrounded by strangers in a place that didn't feel like home anymore.

When she saw Todd try to throw out some of her father's keepsakes, things she purposely hid away for safe keeping, she just lost it.

There was a big blow out between the Prentiss women, and Emily felt constricted.

"Come on, Mother. Was it possible for you to pick a better bed warmer?"

"Excuse me?!"

Things only got worse from there, and when Todd stepped in, grabbing her arms a little too tightly, she pushed him away and ran. She was sure if she spent another moment in that house with her mother, a murder or two would have occurred. A few pretty unrepeatable words were exchanged, and she knew she needed out. She packed a bag and disappeared again.

Elizabeth, equally as angry, didn't bother to go after her. She dumped Todd because no one put their hands on her daughter or yelled at either of them like that, but the anger toward her daughter was at an all-time high and she felt angry enough that if they had another run in, she wasn't sure she could hold back from striking her daughter.

The vile things that came out of her mouth…

But when Emily didn't come home by the next morning, and Emily evaded the security detail that was supposed to be watching her, Elizabeth didn't know what to do. Thankfully, the FBI agent in charge of doing the security clearances and making sure the staff was well equipped had stopped by, and she utilized the advantage.

"No. Everything is not okay, Agent Hotchner. Your incompetent staff lost my daughter."

He managed to get the full story out of her and checked in with some of the staff. None of this was part of his actual job description, but this was his first big job and he wanted it all to go well. So far it wasn't smooth sailing.

He felt a responsibility to help with the situation. After talking to the staff, it seemed that Emily Prentiss was a thief in the night. She was good at escaping. The detail following her could only give the general direction of where she went. After a few miles following on foot, they lost the trail. Given the security threat that brought Elizabeth home, they felt it important to really try and find her as soon as possible.

Unfortunately, Elizabeth knew nothing about her daughter's life. There was one friend that she knew to check in with and James wasn't forthcoming. Truth was, he didn't know where she was, but one of the security guys recognized a location that popped up a few times in pictures from Emily's room.

"Can't hurt to look," Hotch said, jumping into the search.

He knew what it was like to be an angry teen. He wasn't much past that stage at that point. More than that, he saw the worry on Elizabeth's face and didn't want his first major assignment to end in distress. He wanted to bring the girl home.

So, they searched after getting confirmation from James that it was a regular destination for her and finetuning the exact location.

Three men plus Hotch started hiking the trails at Harpers Ferry. He spotted someone that could pass for her and looked at the picture they were all carrying to double check.

She was sitting at an abandoned overpass, staring out at the water.

"Emily?" Hotch called out.

"Oh great. The goon squad," she hissed. "How did you even find me? I made sure to lose the lackeys and took a bus… You know what?" She stood up and faced him. "Don't answer."

Walking away, she said, "I assume you'll grab my shit while I'm taken to prison."

He held back a laugh as he watched her walk away, calling to Milo to follow her.

"She's trouble," Hotch muttered to his buddy as the two gathered her stuff.

"No, I believe you said one sentence to me. I couldn't get a word in edgewise."

"I didn't even know who you were until my mom let it rip when we got home."

"It was a crazy time," he said, pulling into the park's lot. "But this was where we first met, even if not where we were first introduced."

They walked hand in hand to a scenic overlook.

Emily shook her head. "Be honest, you never thought I'd be where I am now based on that meeting."

"Definitely not. I half expected you to be a drug addict or alcoholic going into a fourth or fifth marriage by now."

"Bleak… And sounding a bit like the female Rossi."

"I won't tell him you said that."

"Thanks."

He leaned against the rail beside her. They moved close enough for their arms to touch.

"It's beautiful here."

"It is," Emily agreed. "I forgot how amazing the view is. I used to come here all the time before I left for college." She squinted in wonder and turned her head to face him. "But what made you think about coming here?"

"I told you. We're going back in time."

"But why to this moment? Why here?"

"Because here is where we met. Here is where tropical storm Prentiss made landfall in my life."

"So this isn't the best of tour, then."

"You're not getting it. Working on your mother's staff security clearances was my first major job in the FBI, but I made my presence known much more than I was supposed to. I was trying to make an impression. You and I were never supposed to cross paths on that job. But somehow, I met this wild, tenacious, scared teen who had quite the mouth and this crazy goth hair."

"Hey."

"You know it's true."

She shrugged.

"The point is that my life was changed then, and I didn't even know it yet. Our lives were connected then, before we even realized it."

"We didn't even know each other."

"No, we didn't. Our time wasn't then. We were on different paths. I was with Haley and working my way up the FBI ladder, and you were just starting out and going to school. It would be a long time before that moment became more than just a moment."

"You know you were terrible to me when I first came to the BAU."

"I wasn't."

"You were."

"I was suspicious."

"And you had a reason to be in the end, though I wasn't fully aware at the time what I was getting into."

"Alright, Em. I need you to just let me speak now. Can you do that? No interruptions."

"Hotch… Aaron," Emily said as she watched him fidget. "What's going on?"

"I never realized that when I met you, this crazy girl who I was sure would just be a spoiled little brat for the rest of time and who I never believed I'd give a second thought, that we would end up making such great partners. I guess that's why I brought us here."

He took her hands in his before continuing.

"A full circle moment. We met here then as totally different people who weren't ready to be with each other or even know each other, and when we met again a decade later, we still weren't ready, but we worked well together and got to know who we were as people. It's been a long and winding road full of a lot of low lows and high highs, but, through it all, there was one thing that held steadfast. You are an incredible person Emily Prentiss. You've been through more than I'm sure anyone realizes, and you've always come out on the other side. So, I brought you here to go back in time, to tell the two people who met in this very park that one day our paths would intertwine and follow the same trail, and we wouldn't know how to be without each other."

He reached into his pocket, pulling out a small velvet lined red box.

"We spent enough time working to get to this moment, and I don't want to waste anymore."

"Aaron," Emily whispered, eyes misting.

"I don't know where I would be without you in my life. We've been through a hell of a lot together, and we've overcome it all. Over the years, we've become a family. Together, we've given our boys two loving parents to depend on in their support system. We've built a life. And now I want to make that more permanent."

"The mortgage we cosigned didn't make that feel permanent?" Emily teased. "Maybe the shared bedroom? I gave up closet space."

He smiled but didn't break course.

"Kissing you in that beach house was one of the best bad decisions I've made. We were both unavailable, but our feelings were there. They were bottled up and there were obstacles, but we were instinctually being drawn to each other. I've said before that one day, I'd make you my wife, that we'd have it all: our boys, the house… The only thing missing is the title."

He looked down to the box and back to her.

"I love you, Emily. After Haley, I didn't think I would ever want this again, but with you, I do. I want it all, and I almost have it. The only thing missing is the ring on our finger, the symbol of our love. You make me a better man. You make me a better father. I'd like the chance to be a good husband too. I made my mistakes, but you've never made me feel less for them. I want to spend the rest of my days being that for you, being better because of you. So, I have a question for you."

Getting down on one knee, he held out the box and opened it, "Will you marry me?"