March 2020.
AFTERMATH.
1 Solitary memories..
Joe Cartwright sat in the elderly, blue velvet upholstered chair.
This had been his father's chair for as long as he could remember. For many years Ben Cartwright would sit there, pipe at hand, a newspaper folded to one side as he regularly chastised his youngest son for some small, and realistically minor misdemeanor. He'd then pick up his pipe, puff for a moment or two, then send the offending son to his room to contemplate the error of his ways. The enforced solitude rarely had the desired effect, as it was almost guaranteed that said son would be in trouble the following day or day after. Such was the life of a young Joseph Cartwright!
Now, so many years later, Joe sat quietly. His gaze never leaving the cold stone fireplace that dominated the spacious room. Cold ashes lay in the hearth, unburnt logs still in the dog basket.
Aside from Joe, only Hop Sing was in residence at the ranch house of the Ponderosa. So many things had changed in so short a space of time. Candy was off somewhere in Texas, Joe didn't really have any idea where or why, just that Candy had things he wanted to do. Their agreement had always been, 'Candy wanted to go, then he would leave, probably to return at some later date'. Ben had agreed to this a good few years before and, Candy had wandered in, and out of the Ponderosa life a number of times over the following years. There had never been a contract between them, just trust and faith he would return when he had the calling.
Joe sighed, his heart heavy, and in truth, breaking, this wasn't the life he had anticipated in his youth. In fact it wasn't the life he had anticipated some three years before.
God, how it had changed, and not for the best, he sat, in silence, not a sound could be heard other than the steady tick tock as his mother's grandfather clock marked the passing of seconds and minutes. Nary a sound escaped from the kitchen, Hop Sing so obviously absent along with the comforting sounds he made when preparing each meal for his young boss.
Joe wiped the tears from his eyes, sniffed, then rose. It was just too easy to pour a whiskey or brandy, there was no one to question his motive or need. He reached for the brandy decanter and a fresh glass, poured a large measure then returned to his father's chair. He nursed the brandy, swished it round in the cut crystal glass then sighed again, tears fresh in his emerald green eyes. Joe looked at the drink held so close to his lips, the perfume filling his senses. He sipped, just a small taster of the potent alcohol, then tipped the glass and downed it in one. He frowned, the greying curly hair falling into his eyes, the tears still coursing down his cheeks.
"I'm so sorry Pa.."the only words he could utter before refilling the glass.
The second brandy was followed swiftly by a third, then a forth. Joe stared at decanter, almost empty, how many had he worked his way through in so short a time?
He breathed in deeply, his head aching from the effect of the alcohol and lack of food. How many hours was it since he'd eaten a halfway decent meal...24 maybe 36 hours he couldn't remember. Hop Sing placed food in front of him at every meal time, and, every meal time it returned to the kitchen untouched and fit only for the pigs. Even Hop Sing had given up on him!
Joe lay back in the blue velvet chair, now, even months after his father's death, he could smell the sweet tobacco his father had favoured, and the bay rum after shave he had used for as long as Joe could recall.
Tears started afresh at the memories that poured into his mind. Grief was more than first and foremost in his mind, it was all encompassing. Slowly, through the brandy sodden memories, he brought to mind the loss of his beloved brother Hoss only two years before. He and his Pa had struggled to come to terms with the sudden death of the gentle giant character of the Ponderosa. For Joe, Hoss was his everything, best friend, playmate, confidante, the big brother he adored and turned to for guidance in everything.
But Hoss was gone!
Giving his life to save others, as only Hoss would, a hero in anyone's reckoning. Though for Joe and Ben it was an irreplaceable loss. Joe had supported his father through these tragic circumstances without thought to his own loss or grief, he'd survived...or so he thought.
Hoss was gone.
2 Interlude.
Alice had come along at such an opportune moment. Joe had been lost, vulnerable , without his best friend and big brother. Alice had been the balm to heal a broken heart, so gentle and sweet, loving him for the person he was.
No one could say it was a match made in heaven, but she balanced Joe's wild ways, his mercurial temper and most of all, she eased the pain of losing Hoss. She loved him!
Alice had been 8 months pregnant with their child when she was attacked, raped and murdered then incinerated at the little yellow and white house that Joe had built for them. A small place in the midst of a field full of spring flowers and bird song. A home he had lovingly laboured over to give his wife everything she had ever dreamt of. Near enough to the ranch house for meals and socialising but far enough for privacy. She had loved their home, made it somewhere safe for them both, a refuge from the day to day running of the ranch.
When, after only a month or so of married life, she had announced they would have a new addition to the family, Joe had been beyond excited, to say he was ecstatic would have been an understatement. He grew up over night! Suddenly he realised he was going to be a father, to have the responsibility of a new life. A child. His and Alice's child!
The pain of Hoss' passing eased at the thought of his own child. Ben had welcomed the news with a new vigour to his life, he found the spring in his step that had been missing for so long. Another Cartwright to add to the family, be it boy or girl, he would welcome this new life with open arms and with all the love in his heart.
Alice died.
After the heinous crime that claimed Joe's wife and unborn child, the Ponderosa became a place of sadness and grief. Joe could not rest whilst Alice's killers roamed free. Within days of Dr. Martin declaring the serious burns Joe had sustained trying to reach his wife had healed sufficiently, Joe began the preparations for hunting down the killers. His father had pleaded with him to stay, let the law deal with it, but Joe, still in the depths of raw grief, and seeking retribution, ignored his father's pleas. Though still not in full good health, Joe entrusted his Father's well being and care to the other constant in his life, Hop Sing, the one person he trusted to be at his Father's side what ever the outcome of his search for Alice's killers. The ranch was left in the safe hands of Hank, their trusted foreman of many years standing, who was as knowledgeable as Ben or Joe in all aspects of Ponderosa management.
Joe followed many virtually non existent trails, some heading nowhere, others leading to more clues and information. After a couple of months searching, he finally had located the men guilty of his beloved wife's murder. Quite how he was going to deal with them hadn't really been an issue until he had them within sight, now he was torn between killing them outright or trying to take them to the nearest Sheriff and hoping they would stand trial and pay the price of murder by hanging. His conscience kept him awake at night as he tried to reconcile himself to becoming a murderer such as they.
Somewhere, somehow, the choice was taken from Joe's hands. On the day he had decided that he would send the killers to Hell with bullets to their heads, he'd been sat by a extinguished fire, cold coffee in hand waiting for the killers to make their move. A small sound alerted him to movement behind and a soft nicker from his own horse. He twisted slightly to see the grinning face of Candy break through the tree cover and move towards him.
"I though you might need a hand gettin' this lot back to the Sheriff.." he'd stated in a low whisper, "I'm ready when you are!"
The four men didn't know how close they had come to dying that morning. Together Joe and Candy had overpowered them without a shot being fired. They'd tied them to their horses then took them into the nearest town for justice to be served. From capture to hanging took less than a week, so certain and condemning was the evidence the killers had kept from Joe's home, that the Judge took only moments to issue their death sentences, and the hangings were carried out the following day.
Alice was gone.
3 Continuance.
The room grew colder as Joe sat eyes transfixed on the hearth. He knew he needed to sleep, but as of late he had barely slept more than an hour or so any night. He rose, albeit unsteadily, crossed to the downstairs guest room and opened the door. The chill struck him as the cold air flooded out and he shivered slightly. He was already cold so the chilly room didn't really bother him. Looking round in the gloom, he could see the dirty clothes he'd flung to one side the previous evening, the sheets and quilt were pulled back ready for him to collapse into when he'd had enough to drink. The curtains and blinds pulled across to keep any day light from shining through. Wearily he ran a hand through the long curly hair, once it had been a rich chestnut colour, now it changed from grey to silver depending on the light.
" I know Pa, I look like some river boat gambler..." he muttered to no one in particular then flopped onto the top of the bed.
Pa was gone. Hoss was gone. Alice and their child were gone.
3 Tragedy.
Life had continued after Alice's death. Candy had stayed on at the ranch, had become Joe's right hand man and his best friend. Joe seemed to have climbed out of his trough of depression, and appeared to be getting on with his life as best he could. Ben seemed to have aged rapidly after Alice's death, though he still played a very active part in the day to day running of the Ponderosa. The main responsibility seemed to rest with Joe, who was now making all the major decisions, though he consulted with his father on any large monetary expenditure.
Things appeared to be going so well that Ben had sent Joe and Candy off on a trip to Sacramento supposedly to do a bit of business, but in reality to give Joe the opportunity to get away from the ranch for a few days.
Five days into their trip, both Joe and Candy were sitting relaxing over a couple of beers in one of the more salubrious saloons in the centre of Sacramento. Both were tired from the late night they'd enjoyed the previous evening, now they were relaxing over a beer and contemplating their journey home in two days. Truth be told, both were quite happy thinking of returning to the Ponderosa.
Twenty four hours later, both young men fell from the stage coach as it arrived in Virginia City. Dr. Martin and Sheriff Coffee stood waiting as it shuddered to a stop in a cloud of dust and the door flung open. Joe Cartwright was first to set foot on the boardwalk, Candy only seconds behind him, then the other passengers alighted, wondering at the haste with which the two men had escaped the confines of the coach.
"Joe...here..." a voice called across the noise. Joe turned to see Doctor Paul Martin stood aside Roy Coffee, both moved towards Joe.
Words were spoken softly, for Joe's ears only, Paul Martin's arm resting gently on Joe's shoulder.
"What happened..." Joe had murmured, his face grey and drained.
"A stroke I think..." Paul had replied, " he was at home when it happened."
"But he was ..." Joe had answered. "I want to see my Pa!"
The Doctor led Joe, and Candy, to his offices. There in the back room an oil lamp burnt low, shadows danced in the corners. On a long low table stood a light hued wooden box, a coffin. Candles burnt at the head and foot, white fabric padded the sides. Central to this lay the body of Ben Cartwright.
Joe had stood in silence. He could not believe this was his beloved father. The man he loved more than life itself. The man who promised he would never leave him. The man who had been his rock through out his life. But it was true. Ben Cartwright had passed to his Heavenly reward without his son at his side. He'd been alone, without family to comfort him on his way. Joe stood, he touched the clasped hands, gasped at the coldness. Reached to brush the white hair from his father's brow, then leant over to kiss the cold forehead.
"Forgive me Pa" he whispered, " I should have been here for you."
Candy reached out to his friend, his arm round his shoulders,
" Come on Joe, let's get some sleep, then come back in the morning. There's lot to be done." Gently, very gently, Candy had led Joe from the room, Dr. Martin slipped a small packet into Candy's free hand then nodded.
"Get some rest Joe, I'll be here all night. I'll see you in the morning!"
Pa was gone.
4 Continuance.
Joe closed his eyes, the brandy was working it's magic. Slowly his breathing became deeper and regular as he slipped into an drunken sleep. He rolled to one side, his head resting on his arm, the other hanging over the edge of the bed. Even in sleep he shivered with the cold from the unheated room.
The clock chimed the hours as Joe slept. The house remained silent and cold.
Outside, the yard hands had settled the various animals, Joe's horse, Cochise, had been groomed and fed then turned into the loose box along side Buck. Both mounts nickered softly to each other before settling for the coming night. The porch lights were lit, a beacon for travellers and residents alike. Hank tapped on the front door then stepped inside into the darkening room.
"Joe..." he called softly..."Joe?" He glanced round the vast space, shocked there wasn't a fire roaring in the hearth. He knew Joe was home, he'd just groomed Cochise, but where was he? He knew Joe had closed the upper floor of the house off. Joe couldn't face going upstairs let alone sleep up there on his own. He moved across to the guest room to the left of the front door, tapped then pushed it open. In the dim light he could see the slim shape laying across the bed, from the door he could smell the brandy Joe had consumed.
" OK Boss, " he spoke quietly, hoping not to waken Joe, " let's get you covered up."
Joe was soon covered with a blanket and quilt. A basin set to one side in case he should need it, and water set on the night stand.
" I'll be in the other room if'n you need me..." Hank pulled the door up then went to get comfortable in the living room. Seeing his breath in the cold of the room, he decided first and foremost to light a fire in the hearth, if only to take the chill off the room, then to spark up the kitchen stove and water boiler in preparation for the morning, certain his boss would be looking for a hot bath to clean up some.
Mid morning saw Hop Sing arrived back at the Ponderosa, he climbed down from the buggy and began to empty the goods he'd bought out onto the front porch. The noise had Hank come out from the bunk house,
" Hey Hop Sing, " he greeted, "got a minute?" The Chinese man trotted across to the foreman, gave a little bow then raised his eyebrows,
" What's wrong Mr Hank?"
"Joe...he was drunk last night...I'm worried about him.."
Side by side they made their way into the house,
" He's in here..."Hank pointed to the bedroom to the side.
"He not go upstairs now..." Hop Sing said softly as he pushed the door open.
The odour of vomit and brandy filled the air. In a few steps and moments, the curtains were pulled back, the windows flung open and light flooded the room. Hop Sing turned to the bed and the young man sprawled across it, he pointed to the bowl which Hank swiftly removed to deal with.
Joe groaned as the light pierced his eyes then shifted away from the light.
"What you do...lil Joe...you wake up have coffee, feel better..."
Joe just groaned a second time, waking up was just about the last thing he wanted.
"Go away..." was all he could manage before nausea overtook his stomach, and he lost what ever else was left inside.
Hop Sing wiped Joe's forehead, he could see the sadness in the green eyes, the lack of the bright lights that would normally flash and sparkle with mischief.
"Go have a bath, feel better," he urged, "then I fix light food for sick stomach."
Hank reappeared, with both helping Joe to stand, they guided him to the bathroom.
"The house was cold last night, I took the liberty of lighting the fires Hop Sing..." Hank spoke as they helped Joe discard his dirty and smelly clothing.
The tub filled quickly with hot water, Hop Sing poured in some dried herbs, then giving Joe some balance, helped him into the water. Hank stepped into the kitchen, to give Joe some privacy, had found the coffee pot and set it to boil. Hop Sing soon joined him.
" I should not have gone to Carson..." he muttered, his voice low, "not good leave Joe alone ..."
Hank nodded, " He was out with the herd in the mornin', didn't bed Cochise down or anythin' dunno when he got back here. He's not coping well, wish Candy were here, he can talk him round."
Hank swallowed the hot coffee, "Thanks Hop Sing, best I get on, if you need me, just hollah."
Joe sat at the kitchen table, a plate of scrambled eggs and a mug of coffee in front of him, " Not hungry.." he complained.
"Eat!" He was ordered as his friend sat facing him across the wooden surface.
Slowly the food made it's way from plate to mouth, dark eyes downcast as he worked his way through the meal, no words spoken.
They had spent many hours sitting at this table during the preceding months, eating, talking or just sitting. Joe had forsaken the dining room table for his meals, preferring to sit with Hop Sing in the warmth and comfort of the kitchen, at least he wasn't alone. They would talk of everyday things, the ranch, the hands but never the loss. They would converse in English then sometimes in Chinese, sometimes a mix of both, but neither could speak of that which was hurting them both so badly.
Joe looked up, the shadows beneath his eyes as dark as bruises, the tears still so very close to the surface. He rubbed his right hand across his face then through the still damp tangled mass of hair.
"I'm sorry Hop Sing..."
"No need apologise to me...I understand you, like father..." Hop Sing moved to Joe's side, placed a hand on his shoulder, "I miss them too."
"I don't know if I can do this anymore," Joe shook his head, "When I think...when I ...I can't breath...everything hurts so much. I know Pa...would want me to carry on but I..." words tumbled forth, "this isn't how it was supposed to be. Hoss shouldn't have died. Alice shouldn't have died. Pa shouldn't have died. Adam should be here...I..." Tears fell, he shook his head trying to clear his thoughts. "I'm sorry, I think I need to sleep..."
Hop Sing reached out as Joe passed him, "You are not alone!" and pulled the younger man into a hug. Instinctively Joe's arms went round the small man's shoulders and he clung to him like a drowning man holding a life line.
"You will never be alone, I am here!" Hop Sing whispered into Joe's hair as he held him close, "Go sleep lil Joe, get some rest..."
Telegrams flew around the world, England, Ireland, Italy, Australia, all of the addresses Adam had made contact from in the past. Joe didn't hold out much hope of tracing his eldest and only surviving brother, but he had to try.
Ben Cartwright's will had been read. After the loss of Hoss he'd made everything over to Joe, bar a certain amount of money for Adam, should he ever return. All the rest had been left to Joe, the ranch, investments, holdings and money. He had become a very wealthy young man. In truth, he would have swapped the whole estate to have his family back at his side, but as he tried to accept, that would never happen.
Candy was still doing whatever down in Texas, letters arrived occasionally giving Joe some idea of what was happening, but no mention was ever made of when Candy might return. In turn Joe was becoming more insular and remote from life outside of the ranch.
He would sit for hours up at the grave site on the shore above Lake Tahoe talking to his family, or just gazing out over the vast expanse of azure water, his grief still all consuming.
By some stroke of good fortune there had never been a repeat of the episode with bottle of brandy. Yes, Joe would still drink in an attempt to numb his pain, but he soon found it wasn't helping, in fact he felt much worse after. Plus he was ashamed of the state he had got into, and really didn't want to repeat it. Brandy and whiskey disappeared from the oak dresser, probably hidden in Horsing's private quarters, Joe still had a beer or glass of wine, but even that had lost it's appeal.
Daily, Joe would force himself to rise, rarely eating breakfast before allocating the day's tasks to his foreman Hank. He'd watch the hands disperse to their various destinations then decide what would be his project for the day. Out of preference he would ride off somewhere he could work alone. Fence mending, a task he had hated as a youth, now held a fascination, he could be away all day without seeing a soul. Checking and resupplying the line shacks, a boring job in the past now gave him days of solitude. Some days he would just ride out to check the wild horses, or the outlying cattle, quite content to be alone with his thoughts. Hop Sing continued to prepare food that wouldn't get eaten and continued to worry about his young boss who appeared to be fading away before his eyes. Some evenings he would watch the younger man gazing away into nowhere, often hardly a word would be spoken. When asked if he could help, Hop Sing would be told no, Joe then would disappear to the downstairs bedroom, leaving Hop Sing to his own resources.
The days merged together. There was no difference between weekday or Sunday, everyday followed the same basic routine. Joe no longer attended Church in Virginia City, never invited anyone out for Sunday lunch and rarely went into town. Many people couldn't remember the last time they had laid eyes on Joe Cartwright, and came up with some wild reasons for his noticeable absence. Had he left the Ponderosa, had he remarried, or perhaps gone away like his eldest brother, was he also dead but the Chinese servant was hiding it? Speculation was rife and gossip spread quickly. Dr. Martin and the Sheriff gave up trying to put the tales to rest, it was easier to just let them gossip away. If Joe did venture in, it would be solely for business, no stopping for a beer or a game of cards, nor visiting one of his friends, male or female. The local single girls were all very disappointed at the distinct lack of interest from the handsome young man who had once been the town Lothario.
The spring cattle drive came around, 1000 head of finest Ponderosa beef had to be delivered south west into California. Hank chose the hands to ride with him, plus took on a few extra to make up the numbers. Hop Sing would be running the chuck wagon and Joe would be Bossing the drive. A handful of men would remain at the ranch to keep things ticking over, while the lumber side of things carried on under the watchful eye of Amos Freeman, Joe's timber boss. The mine workings were well handled by another very experienced employee, Gus Masters, so Joe was happy to leave for the three weeks or so it would take to get the cattle to market and then return.
Hop Sing had the chuck wagon prepared and packed ready for the Saturday morning departure. Bed rolls, spare clothes, medical supplies packed away along side tins, flour and various food stuffs. He would be well prepared for all eventualities!
Friday afternoon found Joe in Virginia City, he had a few chores to complete before heading out around dawn the following morning. First stop was the bank, he knew he would need some cash as well as bank drafts and also to put in place sufficient funds for paying the remaining hands their wages. Amos and Gus would be taking on this responsibility in his absence. Next was a visit to Dr Martin's, mostly just social but Joe felt he needed to reassure the Doctor, and for that matter, Sheriff Coffee, that he was okay but going to be missing for a while.
"You look too thin Joe," Dr. Martin informed him, "are you eating properly?" Joe had shrugged, "Kinda..." The Doctor glared at him, " Eat young man, you're going to be pushing yourself hard. I'm telling you this as your Doctor and...as your Godfather. Understood?"
Joe rolled his eyes, "I'm fine, don't worry! See you in a few weeks. Any problems just wire me at the Cattleman's Hotel."
The Sheriff had similar words for the young man before waving him off on the road out of town.
Dawn came early on the Ponderosa, by the time the sun had risen over the tops of the Ponderosa Pines, Joe, Hank and the hands urged and nudged the dozing cattle into a steady walk on their way to California. Hop Sing followed a short distance behind, already planning their first meal on the trail.
For once, it seemed all was on the cattle drive's side. Fair weather made the days easier to work. Plentiful grazing for the cattle as they made their way south and west. The hands all pulling together rather than having fall outs and arguments. Not wanting to jinx anything, not a word was spoken of their continuing good fortune, but all were aware things could change in the twinkling of an eye.
Hop Sing was keeping them all well fed, bar Joe who still only ate the smallest amounts, barely enough to keep him going in Hop Sing's opinion, but he seemed to be coming out of the deep depression he'd been in at the outset of the drive.
"Evenin' Joe, " Hank greeted Joe as he rode up alongside his boss at the rear of the herd, "d'ya reckon we'll be at the stock yards tomorrow?"
Joe pushed his hat back on his curls, " Hope so Hank, gettin" mighty fed up with sleeping on the floor now." Hank chuckled softly not wanting to spook the cattle meandering along in front and beside their mounts. " Me too, gettin' too old for this lark!"
"Should be there by midday at this rate..." Hank nodded his agreement then eased his mount away into the cluster of cattle, " see you later.."
Another night passed in peace, men slept whilst others kept watch, all rotating guard during the hours of darkness, keeping the cattle calm and quiet until ready to continue at daybreak.
Dawn came too early for Joe, he'd been on watch around midnight then had failed to sleep at all. Now he was grateful for the strong hot coffee Hop Sing handed him before the other hands began to surface. He yawned, scratched his head then ran his free hand through his hair. " I'm sure looking forward to having a bath when I get into town!" He mused, " I smell as bad as the cows and the horses!" Hop Sing grinned at his boss then nodded in agreement before going back to his task of preparing breakfast for them all.
Knowing they were so close to the end of the trail gave the hands a reason to be cheerful, they perked up at the thought of no more cattle to babysit, having a bath and soft bed, Maybe even a pretty girl's company for while, along with a beer or two, and of course, the fact they would have some money in their pockets. Joe too was anticipating the hot bath and soft bed as much as his work force, and was spurred on by just that thought. Though, the thought of the bank draft he would be depositing also put a smile on his face.
Late afternoon found the herd safely contained in the pens adjacent to the railway spur. The hands all paid off and raring to go for a bath, a beer and a girl, though not necessarily in that order. Hop Sing would get things organised, clean clothes for Joe, any telegrams sent by hands to their families, the chuck wagon restocked and stored for the time they remained in the town, then he intended to visit family members. He asked Joe if he wanted any company for the first day or so, but was happy to be told to go join his family. Should any problems arise, he or Hank could be easily found.
Not too much later found Joe, Hank and all the hands stood at the bar of the Starr Saloon, beers in hand and food ordered. Rumour had it that the saloon had belonged to Belle Starr, quite an infamous lady of the time, though the truth of that was quite doubtful, and none of the hands were that interested. Joe stood the first couple of rounds for his men. Cartwright cattle drives were always "dry" affairs so this opportunity to have a few beers on the Boss was not to be missed. It was a Cartwright tradition for as long as Joe could remember, so he willingly fulfilled his role. Before leaving for his own chance to get some rest, he ordered another round of drinks and paid for the men's meals, slipped Hank a few more bills, then wished them all a good evening. Though he did warn them he really didn't want to have to bail anyone out of jail, if possible. That bought a few smiles and comments from some of the older men, who delighted in reminding Joe of the times he'd been bailed out in his youth. Joe took their teasing with good humour, waved goodbye then strolled out into the evening air...