18.
Somewhere around the third hour of the interrogation, Jaina finally lost what little patience she'd had. She was exhausted, and it didn't help that they'd spent the last three hours simply beating a man who knew better than to talk. She sat there and watched, stewing over the fact that she could've ended this hours ago. Ahsoka sat calmly beside her, never saying a word, even though Jaina knew she could feel every bit of the frustration building in her.
She'd never allowed her interrogations to go on this long. It didn't take her very long to figure out if someone was going to talk or not. They either responded to the physical prompting, or they didn't. This officer fell squarely into the latter. And, just like the subjects she'd dealt with that were in the same category, the only way they were going to get the information they needed, was if she did what Ahsoka had expressly forbidden her to do.
Deciding she couldn't wait any longer, Jaina bowed her head and closed her eyes. She quickly reached through the Force and touched his mind. He was physically exhausted, but his mind still held the confident determination she'd seen in other Imperial officers just like him. Their arrogance at being able to withstand something most people couldn't dripped off of them, and he was no different. She'd never taken any pleasure in the pain she'd caused the others, but she would enjoy this.
Wasting no more time, she forced her way in, feeling his mind recoil and hearing him gasp as she did. Even though he'd been repeatedly asked about it, the attack wasn't at the forefront of his thoughts. That was reserved for the family he had, and Jaina felt a twinge of guilt as she forced her way past them. His mind was a tangled mess, and she pushed aside anything that didn't have to do with the attack, her parents, or the Inquisitor.
It didn't take her long to find what she was looking for. Buried behind everything else, was a memory: his last encounter with the Inquisitor before his capture. It gave her every detail she needed. She started sifting through the memory, only faintly aware of the distress she was causing him.
Suddenly, she felt a strong surge of anger that wasn't her own. Her concentration wavered slightly but didn't break. She was determined to get the information they needed, one way or another.
"That's enough." Ahsoka's voice was frigid, and Jaina involuntarily shivered slightly as her master's fury washed over her. Any other time she would've heeded the obvious warning, but he was giving her everything they needed, so she ignored it and pushed on.
In an instant, she was roughly hauled to her feet and pinned against the wall, her connection with the officer's mind immediately severed. Never before had she ever had that connection unwillingly cut off, and the effect was instantaneous. Pain exploded behind her eyes as her mind tried to adjust to what had happened, and she let out a pained cry.
"I said, that's enough!" Ahsoka growled.
Jaina shook her head, trying to clear the fog and the pain, and it finally subsided enough to allow her to open her eyes. Ahsoka was glaring at her, not unlike she did the day she'd lost control with Sabine, and her arm was stretched out in front of her, as she used the Force to hold Jaina against the wall.
"You shouldn't have stopped me," Jaina spat out, glaring right back at her. "He was giving me everything we need!"
"And I told you not to do it," Ahsoka retorted, anger flashing in her eyes.
"I did what needed to be done," Jaina replied indignantly. "He wasn't going to give them anything."
Ahsoka didn't respond, and they continued to scowl at each other, neither one of them willing to concede to the other. Jaina had completely forgotten there was anyone else in the room until Bo-Katan finally spoke up.
"The two of you. Outside. Now," she said, her tone deadly. A chill went up Jaina's back, and Ahsoka finally released her. Her cousin quickly strode out of the room, followed closely by Ahsoka. Jaina shakily followed her master, her body still feeling the aftereffects of the severed connection.
"What the hell was that?" Bo-Katan hissed, once the door had closed behind them.
No one spoke, and Jaina realized the two of them were now looking at her. She suddenly felt very small and wanted nothing more than to hide from both of them.
"Go on," Ahsoka said, "tell her." Jaina gave her a pained look, and Ahsoka narrowed her eyes in warning.
"It's—" Jaina started, then she sighed in defeat. "It's an ability I have. I'm able to access someone else's mind when I want and see their thoughts."
Bo-Katan looked visibly shocked. "And that's what you were doing in there?"
"Yes," Jaina said in a small voice, looking at the floor. She was sure her cousin was going to scold her, just as her master was, as soon as they were alone. No one spoke, and Jaina was too afraid to look at either one of them.
"So," Bo-Katan said after a long moment, "what did you find in his thoughts?"
Jaina looked up at her in surprise, then quickly glanced at Ahsoka, who gave a reluctant shrug.
"They're alive," she said. "All of them, they're alive. I saw them. Well, he saw them, right before he was captured. The Inquisitor is there too. They're being held at some sort of outpost somewhere. I don't know where. I didn't get that far before…" She trailed off, not wanting to anger her master any more than she already was.
Bo-Katan looked thoughtful as she digested this information. "Interesting. And this, ability, it causes someone pain when you do it?"
Jaina nodded. "Most people don't want you sifting through their thoughts, and the more resistant they are, the more painful it is. At least, that's what I've seen anyway."
"Very interesting," Bo-Katan said, and she began to pace. "But what if someone wasn't resistant? What if they allowed you access, so to speak?"
"I have no idea," Jaina replied. "I've never tried that before. I suppose it would still cause some discomfort but…I'm not sure."
"But, even with some discomfort, he'd still be able to answer questions, right? And you'd be able to tell me if he's lying or not?"
Jaina nodded. "Absolutely. In my experience, the more pain someone is in, the quicker and easier it is to get answers."
"What are you thinking?" Ahsoka asked warily. Bo-Katan stopped pacing and looked at them.
"He clearly has the information we need, and she—" she motioned to Jaina "—has the means to get it. But rather than having her root around in his head trying to find it, I think we try a different approach. Based on what I've just seen, I don't think he's going to be able to withstand that amount of pain again. So, let's give him a chance to answer on his own. If he decides not to play—"
"—Then I'll show him that it would be in his best interest to tell us exactly what we want to know," Jaina interjected and Bo-Katan nodded.
"Exactly," she said, an evil smile playing on her lips. "If it's possible, I'd like for you to stay inside his head no matter what, to ensure he's telling us the truth. Can you do that?"
Jaina nodded. "Absolutely." Ahsoka crossed her arms and didn't look happy, but she didn't object.
Satisfied, Bo-Katan headed back into the room. Once again, Ahsoka caught Jaina's arm before she could follow.
"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" she asked. Jaina could feel that her anger from earlier had now turned into worry.
"Yes," Jaina assured her. "I used to do this for a living, remember?"
Ahsoka pursed her lips. "Okay. But if I sense that it's getting out of hand, or something's wrong, I'm pulling you out."
"Okay," Jaina replied, swallowing an urge to argue. Ahsoka released her arm and they joined Bo-Katan inside the room.
Jaina immediately noticed the change in the officer. Gone was the arrogance, and in its place, fear. He shrank back in his seat as Jaina and Bo-Katan approached him, taking seats opposite him.
"Let's try this again, shall we?" Bo-Katan said calmly. "And maybe this time, a little bit more cooperation from you, yes?"
The officer's eyes darted between her and Jaina, finally settling on Jaina. She gave him a half-smile, then bowed her head and closed her eyes. Reaching through the Force, she gently touched the edge of his mind again, waiting for Bo-Katan to begin her questioning.
"Where are you holding our people? We know it's here, on Mandalore. Tell me where."
Jaina gave the man a moment to see if he would respond, and when he didn't, she forced her way in once more. He cried out in pain, and she went searching for the memory from earlier. It didn't take her long to find it.
"That pain your feeling?" she heard Bo-Katan say, "it will go away if you just tell me what I want to know."
Jaina increased the pressure on him and he cried out again. "You're going to give us the information regardless," Bo-Katan told him. "The only choice you have is how painful it's going to be for you."
He let loose with a string of curse words, and Jaina upped the pressure a little more. She knew he wouldn't last much longer, as the memory had started making its way to the front of his mind. She was relieved; partly because they were finally going to get the information they needed, and also because her strength was rapidly starting to wane. Being ripped out of the man's mind earlier, plus the lack of sleep, food, and stress from the events of the last day or so was finally starting to take its toll on her.
"Okay, okay, okay!" he yelled, "I'll tell you everything! Whatever you want to know! Just make it stop!"
The memory was now at the front of his mind, so Jaina backed off, but still kept her focus on the memory. She heard him sigh as the pain eased.
"Where are you holding our people?" Bo-Katan asked again. This time, he hesitated for only a second before responding.
"They're at my outpost. It's located outside the capital. Not far. A half-hour maybe, to the north."
Jaina nodded to indicate he was telling the truth, and Bo-Katan continued: "Tell me about this outpost."
"It's walled on all sides with only one main entrance. Full company of stormtroopers, along with armor. No TIEs."
Jaina nodded again. "Good," Bo-Katan said. "And where in the compound are you keeping my people?"
"There are three buildings. Your people are being held in the main one in the center of the base. It has three stories. The cells are located on the main floor, west side of the building."
Jaina nodded once again. Everything he had told them so far was exactly what she was seeing. "Excellent," Bo-Katan said. "And what about this, Inquisitor? Is she there as well?"
Jaina felt his mind recoil in fear as the image of her came into focus. "Yes," he breathed.
"And why is she there? What does she want?"
"I—I'm not sure," he stammered. "She's after someone here. I don't know who, and I don't really care. She came to my outpost, commandeered my troops, attacked your people, and brought some back as prisoners. I swear to you, I had no idea what she was planning. She never shared that with me."
Jaina shook her head. Some of it was the truth, but he was lying about not knowing. She increased the pressure in his head again, warning him.
"Okay, okay!" He sighed. "I've been keeping tabs on you for a long time and I've been able to identify most of your chain of command. The Inquisitor came to me asking for information on two of them, so I gave it to her. I also kept her apprised of your group's movements, and when we heard of your attack on the weapons depot and saw who was leading it, she took a team of my best troops out to intercept them."
"But you still don't know who she's after," Bo-Katan said.
"No," the man replied dejectedly. "I swear to you, I have no idea. I assumed it was the two she'd asked me about, but then she had me record and send that message to you." Jaina nodded once more.
"Thank you. You've been very helpful," Bo-Katan said. "I appreciate your cooperation."
Jaina backed completely out of his mind and opened her eyes. The officer sat there, utterly defeated, his head in his hands. Bo-Katan rose from her chair and Jaina did the same, both turning around to leave the room. Jaina slowly walked back to Ahsoka, who was watching her intently, a concerned look etched on her face.
"Oh, and one more thing," Bo-Katan said, stopping at the door and turning around. "How am I supposed to get in touch with the Inquisitor, to meet her terms for getting my people back?"
The officer looked up and thought for a moment. "The comlink they took off of me when I was captured. You can use that to directly contact her."
Bo-Katan smiled. "Excellent." She turned back to the door, nodding to the two warriors who were still in the room, as she exited. Jaina and Ahsoka were halfway out the door when a single blaster shot rang out, causing them both to jump.
"Well, I think that went extremely well," Bo-Katan mused as Jaina and Ahsoka joined her. "I just wish I would've known you could do that before we had started."
Jaina shot Ahsoka a look that said "I told you so", which Ahsoka promptly ignored. "So, what's next?" Jaina eagerly asked. "We know where they're being held, so now what?"
"Now, you need to get some rest," Ahsoka said quickly before Bo-Katan had a chance to answer. "It's been a very long day." Jaina scowled at her. Sure, she was exhausted, but she could sleep later. There was still a lot more work to be done.
Bo-Katan studied Jaina for a moment before speaking. "Your master is right. It's late and we all need some rest." Jaina's face fell, and Bo-Katan chuckled. "Don't worry, we'll begin planning our attack in the morning. For now, do as she says and go get some sleep."
Jaina nodded and reluctantly followed Ahsoka outside. The compound was eerily quiet, and in the stillness and cool air of the night, the last bit of adrenaline that had been keeping her going finally wore off. The exhaustion she'd been keeping at bay for the last few hours broke free, and she stumbled. Ahsoka caught her before she hit the ground, and Jaina gave her a weak smile as she stood back up.
"I'm fine," she mumbled, and Ahsoka gave her a disapproving look. "I know, I know, I'm a terrible liar."
Ahsoka didn't let go of her as they walked. She felt like she always did after a night of hard drinking and was supremely glad Ahsoka was with her. There was a very good chance she wouldn't have made it back on her own. After what felt like an eternity, they made it back to Jaina's quarters, and Ahsoka half-carried her as she stumbled in.
Emry woke up as soon as they entered and quickly rushed to help Ahsoka. Jaina tried to say something to her, but her body was already shutting down, and her words were incoherent.
"What's wrong with her?" she heard Emry say. "Is she drunk?" She sounded far away, and Jaina tried to look at her, but couldn't keep her head up or her eyes open any longer.
"No," Ahsoka replied, "just exhausted. She needs to sleep." Even though she was barely awake, Jaina could hear the annoyance in her voice.
They led her over to the bed, and she was vaguely aware of someone helping her to get undressed. The last thing she heard was Emry's soothing voice urging her to lie down. A sound startled her awake hours later, and she opened her eyes to see Sabine frozen in place, half bent over as she reached for whatever it was that she had dropped, a guilty look on her face.
"Sorry!" she whispered loudly. She quickly grabbed the item and a few more things off her bed and hurried out the door. Jaina groaned, pulled the blanket over her head, and rolled over. She wasn't ready to wake up yet. For a brief moment, she wondered where Emry was, then sleep overtook her once more.
Fortunately, no one else bothered her again, and she took her time waking up. She had no idea how long she'd slept but figured if she'd been needed, Ahsoka would've come and got her. She was lying there with her eyes closed, feeling the ebb and flow of the emotions around her when she sensed Emry approaching.
She kept her eyes closed, pretending to still be asleep, and waited for Emry to enter. A minute later she did, and after a moment, she felt her walk up beside the bed. Emry hesitated, then turned to go, and Jaina quickly reached out and grabbed her arm. Emry let out a startled gasp and jumped back, cursing under her breath. Her eyes narrowed when she saw that Jaina was fully awake and now laughing at her.
"Not funny," she said grumpily. "You knew I was coming, didn't you?"
Grinning, she slowly nodded, and Emry huffed and rolled her eyes. Jaina opened her arms and gave Emry the poutiest look she could, knowing she wouldn't stay mad at her for long. And she was right. A small smile formed on Emry's lips, and she gave in. As soon as she got close enough, Jaina grabbed her arms and pulled her down onto the bed. They shared a long kiss before Emry sat back up.
"You seem to be feeling much better," she said, giving Jaina an amused look.
"I am," Jaina replied. "Apparently, I was a lot more tired than I realized."
"You're not invincible, you know," Emry chided. "I couldn't tell if Ahsoka was mad at you or worried about you when she brought you in here last night. Or both."
"Probably both," Jaina mused. "I may or may not have given her a reason to be mad at me earlier in the evening."
Emry let out an exasperated sigh. "Why does that not surprise me?"
Jaina smiled sheepishly. "Because you know I'm stubborn and hard-headed? And sometimes I'm not very good at following directions?"
"Sometimes?" Emry said, raising an eyebrow. Jaina shrugged and gave her another grin. "So, what did you do to make her mad?"
"Well…um…remember that thing I told you I could do?" Jaina said slowly. "The one Ahsoka told me never to do again?"
Emry nodded, and Jaina gave her a guilty look. "Jaina!" Emry exclaimed, her eyes going wide. Her tone was a mix of shock and disappointment and Jaina flinched. "Why would you—" Emry stopped and shook her head. "No wonder she was mad at you."
"I had to!" Jaina said defensively. "It was the only way we were going to get any information from him." Emry crossed her arms and shook her head again, clearly displeased.
"Well, it apparently worked," Emry said. "Sabine and I were tasked earlier this morning to help conduct recon on an outpost to the north of here. I take it that's where your parents are?"
Jaina nodded as she smiled to herself. So, Bo-Katan had started planning the attack, just like she'd said she would. A thought crossed her mind— "Wait, so you've been out there already?"
"Yep," Emry said, "and we're actually supposed to be going back out there soon, to gather more information." She held up a hand, stopping the questions before Jaina could even get them out. "And before you even ask, you'll get a full brief from Ahsoka later, once you get up."
Jaina frowned but knew better than to argue. If Ahsoka wanted to be the one to brief her, then she'd let her. She slowly realized Emry was gazing at her, an almost mischievous look on her face. "What…?" Jaina asked, almost afraid of what the answer was going to be.
"Oh, nothing," Emry said playfully. "Just thinking about that thing you're not supposed to do."
"What about it?" Jaina asked slowly, narrowing her eyes. She had a feeling she wasn't going to like where Emry was going with this.
"Oh, you know," she replied, her tone still playful. "Just that it's a shame you can't read my mind right now." This time, there was no mistaking the mischievousness in the grin she flashed Jaina. It didn't take Jaina long to catch on.
"In this case, I don't need to," she replied, smirking. Emry chuckled and leaned over, softly kissing her. After a moment, her lips moved over to Jaina's ear, and then slowly down her neck.
"I thought you said you had to leave soon," Jaina murmured, as Emry's lips slowly moved lower and lower. She shivered as Emry's fingertips started tracing a path up and down her stomach.
"Soon, but not yet," she replied, in between kisses. "I have some time." She suddenly stopped and stood up, and Jaina immediately groaned before she realized what she was doing. Emry hurriedly undid her gun belt, letting it fall to the floor, then kicked her boots off next to it. She grinned. "There. That'll save us some time."
"You should've just taken all of it off," Jaina said, wagging her eyebrows at her. Emry laughed and crawled under the blanket with her.
"I figured you'd be more than happy to help with that part," she replied and hungrily kissed Jaina again.
"You're right," Jaina said, and she quickly stripped her shirt off and threw it on the floor. She rolled Emry over onto her back, taking her time as she kissed down Emry's neck, to her chest, then her stomach, her hands gradually working Emry's trousers off. Soon, they too were on the floor. She slowly made her way back up to Emry's lips, feeling Emry's body tremble as her fingertips traced a teasing path down her stomach.
She lingered for a moment and pulled her head back to look at Emry. There was an intense need in her eyes, and Jaina hesitated for only a second longer. Emry's back arched and she let out a soft moan before grabbing Jaina's head and kissing her, hard. She moved with the rhythm of Emry's body, completely losing herself in the emotions that were rolling off of her.
It didn't take long before Emry grabbed her tightly, her breathing ragged in Jaina's ear. Her back arched again, and she gasped. Jaina felt her body go rigid and twitch; then her muscles relaxed, and she fell back onto the bed. Jaina laid on top of her, kissing her softly. Emry's hips were still moving from the aftereffects, and it was rapidly causing Jaina to lose what little of the self-control she had left. She pulled herself out from between Emry's legs and straddled her waist, kissing her fervently.
Emry ran her hands down Jaina's back and around to her stomach, slowly teasing their way down, testing her patience. She held her breath as Emry hovered for a moment, then it was her turn to let out a low moan. She buried her face in Emry's neck as waves of pleasure rocked her. Just as Jaina had done with her, Emry moved in rhythm with her body, slowly at first and then gradually faster.
The waves suddenly intensified, and Jaina frantically moved her lips to Emry's, kissing her, hard. With one last intense wave, Jaina's body tensed and she let out a small cry. She twitched as the waves slowly subsided and then relaxed, collapsing on top of Emry and breathing hard. Emry gently stroked her back as she laid there, both of them completely spent.
After a long moment, she lazily lifted her head and Emry gave her a blissful smile. She returned it and leaned up to kiss her.
"Told you I had some time," Emry said softly.
"Mm-hmm," Jaina mumbled, kissing her again. She was so focused on Emry that she didn't sense Ahsoka approaching until it was almost too late. She froze and was in the process of turning her head when the door opened, and her master walked in.
Jaina wasn't entirely sure what it looked like when a Togruta blushed, as she had never actually seen Ahsoka embarrassed before, but now she knew. Ahsoka's head was buried in a datapad as she walked in, but when she looked up and realized what she was seeing, her face turned a deep shade of orange. Jaina heard Emry quietly gasp, and she gave her master a weak smile.
"Uh…hi," she said, mentally breathing a sigh of relief as she realized, by some sort of miracle, the blanket was still covering her and Emry.
To her credit, Ahsoka quickly recovered and looked as though she was trying her hardest not to laugh. Jaina could sense her amusement, and it only added to her own. She was also trying desperately not to laugh if only to save Emry from further embarrassment. She didn't have to see Emry's face to know it was a deep shade of red.
"Glad to see you're finally awake," Ahsoka said, the amusement evident in her tone. "Come and see me whenever you're ready. I'll be next door."
"Okay," Jaina replied, and Ahsoka turned to go. She paused at the door.
"Oh, and Emry?" she said over her shoulder. "Sabine is looking for you. They're ready to head out again."
"Okay," Emry said, her voice slightly higher pitched than normal. "Thank you." Ahsoka nodded once, then left them alone again.
As soon as she was gone, Emry hit Jaina in the arm. "I thought you said you were able to sense when she was coming!" The laughter Jaina had been holding in came tumbling out and Emry hit her again, which only caused her to laugh harder.
"I'm sorry!" Jaina said. "I usually can!" She dissolved into laughter again, and Emry crossed her arms and glared at her. "Oh, come on, you don't find this at least a little bit funny?"
"No," Emry replied indignantly, "I don't."
"Well, I'm blaming it on you then," Jaina said in a teasing tone. Emry's eyebrows shot up. "If I hadn't been so distracted by you, I would've sensed her coming." Emry rolled her eyes and groaned.
"You're impossible," she said, but Jaina could already feel her embarrassment fading. She grinned at Emry.
"Look at it this way," she said, uncrossing Emry's arms and intertwining their fingers together. "At least she didn't walk in two minutes earlier. That would not have been funny."
"Fair point," Emry said, her lips finally breaking into a small smile. Jaina pinned her arms down on the bed and leaned in, waiting; Emry met her halfway and kissed her, her frustration now completely gone. Not in the mood to leave the bed just yet, Jaina quickly increased the intensity of the kiss and trailed one of her hands down Emry's stomach.
"Nope," Emry said, grabbing her hand. "I have to go and so do you."
Jaina sighed heavily, knowing she was right. "Fine." She gave Emry one last kiss and sat up, looking around to see where her clothes and lightsaber were. Finding them, she finally got out of bed, and they both quickly got dressed.
"Oh! I almost forgot," Emry said, as Jaina finished tying her boots. "I left food for you over there, in case you were hungry when you woke up."
Jaina looked over to the small kitchen area where she was pointing and noticed two ration packs and a piece of jogan fruit sitting on the counter. Suddenly starving and too lazy to walk over to them, she stretched her hand out and floated them to her. Emry gave her an amused look as she watched.
"Thanks," Jaina said, quickly taking a bite of the fruit. She tucked the ration packs under her arm and stood up, placing her lightsaber on its hook on her belt. It was time to go see what Ahsoka wanted and to find out what the plan was to get her parents back.
"Shall we?" Emry said, turning to go. Jaina caught her arm and pulled her back to her.
"You're not invincible either," she said quietly, her tone serious. "Please be careful."
"I will. I promise." She kissed Jaina and together they walked outside. Emry took off at a jog toward the starfighters, and Jaina walked over to the building next to theirs. She purposefully knocked on the door, just to make a point.
Ahsoka walked out a moment later, smirking and shaking her head. "Very funny." Jaina just smiled at her, too busy chewing on the jogan fruit to reply. "I see you got the food Emry brought you?" Jaina took another bite and nodded. "Excellent. Let's go."
"Where are we going?" Jaina asked, in between bites.
"To see your cousin," Ahsoka replied. "She wants to bring you up to speed on what we've learned since last night."
"Anything interesting?" Jaina asked.
"I'll let her fill you in on the details, but…" Ahsoka's voice faded into the background as Jaina suddenly noticed one of the Mandalorian starfighters rising from the landing area. She watched as it rose higher, then sped off into the distance, feeling Emry's presence fade with it. She knew Emry could handle herself, but that didn't stop her from worrying.
"Jaina." Ahsoka's firm voice broke through her thoughts, pulling her back.
"Huh?" she said, still distracted. She slowly realized Ahsoka was looking at her in a way that suggested she was expecting an answer to a question she'd asked, but Jaina hadn't heard. "Oh…um…"
"You didn't hear a word of what I just said, did you?" Ahsoka put her hands on her hips, and Jaina mentally cringed.
"No, sorry," she said apologetically, giving Ahsoka a guilty look. "It won't happen—"
"It's okay. I completely understand." Ahsoka interjected, a sympathetic look on her face.
"—again. Wait, what?" Jaina said, finally hearing what Ahsoka said. She couldn't hide her slight shock. "You do?"
"Of course, I do," Ahsoka said, chuckling. "I'm not a droid. I have feelings and emotions just like everyone else."
"I mean, I know that but I guess I just never expected—" she stopped and paused for a moment. "I guess because you're so good at controlling them, I never realized that you'd ever felt the same way I do about someone else."
"Maybe not to the extent of what you have with Emry, but yes, there have been others, in the past, that I've had feelings for." Jaina sensed a flicker of sadness pass through her, and then it was gone.
"What happened to them? Did you ever tell them how you felt? Did they ever know?" Ahsoka wasn't candid with her very often, and she was intensely curious about this little glimpse into her master's past.
Ahsoka snorted. "I didn't exactly grow up with the best role models to show me how to deal with those kinds of emotions and feelings. Or any kind of emotions really. The Jedi didn't believe in allowing your emotions to control you."
"But, feelings like that are completely natural. Everyone gets them. You can't tell me the Jedi were any different." Jaina's mind refused to wrap itself around the idea that the Jedi just didn't allow themselves to feel anything.
"Oh, you're absolutely right. They weren't any different." She sighed. "The Jedi didn't believe in any form of attachment. Especially romantic attachment. That was forbidden and could get you expelled from the Order if they found out."
Jaina chewed on that for a minute, then shook her head. "That's ridiculous. You can't help how you feel about someone." She couldn't imagine being told she couldn't act on her feelings for Emry. "I'm glad I'm not a Jedi then."
Ahsoka chuckled. "My master would've agreed with you. He felt the same way you do about that particular rule."
Jaina sensed a deep sadness coming from her, but she didn't provide any more details, and Jaina wasn't about to ask. After a moment, Ahsoka shook her head and gave her apprentice a pointed look.
"He also had a tendency to not listen to or follow the instructions of his master." She raised an eyebrow and Jaina guiltily looked away. She had been waiting for the hammer to fall, and it looked like it was going to be now. She braced herself for the stern lecture she knew was coming.
She heard Ahsoka sigh and looked back up at her, seeing a ghost of a smile on her face. "It was a tendency he managed to pass on to his own apprentice, who has apparently passed it on to you."
Jaina gave her a small smile. "I guess I'm just carrying on the tradition." Her tone immediately turned solemn: "I'm really, really sorry about last night. I know I screwed up, and even though it turned out okay in the end, I shouldn't have done it."
"I understand why you disobeyed me," Ahsoka said, "but that doesn't mean I agree with it though. There are going to be times when I tell you not to do something, and you need to listen to me, whether you agree with it or not. You have to trust that I have a good reason for it." Jaina nodded sincerely. "And," she added, "if you ever feel like you need to know the reason…just ask. Okay?"
Jaina looked up at her and realized she meant it. "Okay. I will. Thank you," she bowed her head, "Master." Ahsoka inclined her head slightly in return.
"Now," she said, gesturing for them to keep walking, "let's not keep your cousin waiting any longer."
They walked in silence towards the command center, Jaina turning the conversation they'd just had over in her head. Ahsoka very rarely talked about her Jedi past, and she seldom mentioned her master. Jaina assumed he'd died in the purge at the end of the Clone War, and she could always sense a hint of guilt along with the sadness that came the rare times Ahsoka did mention him.
"Do you think he'd be proud?" Jaina quietly asked as they approached the command center. "Your master, I mean. If he could see you now, do you think he'd be proud of you?"
Ahsoka didn't answer for a long moment, and Jaina started to think she maybe shouldn't have asked. They stopped outside the door and Ahsoka turned to look at her.
"Yes," she said firmly, then paused. "At least, I'd like to hope he would be."
Jaina nodded and gave her a small smile. "I think he would be too."
Ahsoka smiled back at her, and, putting her arm around Jaina's shoulders, they entered the command center together. There were still so many unknowns, but there was one thing Jaina knew with absolute certainty: no matter what happened, as long as she had her master by her side, there would be nothing she wouldn't be able to do.