She's on a beach on the eastern side of Florida, her toes in the sand. She's holding her locket in her hands.
She's seven years old again. The locket is from her grandmother, the woman whose face she can't remember. Can't remember. She tries, can't place a face, can't hear her voice.
The first memory she has is...strange, somehow, blurred. It feels wrong, but it's still...clear, in a way. She can't focus on it. It gets fuzzy if she tries.
She's never thought about opening it before, because it's always been...stuck, the two pieces pressed together, immovable. But now it's different. Things are different. She came here to run away from the voices in her head but they followed, and now… now she has no choice.
There's a sky above her, and it must be getting dark because it's still half blue but the other half is copper-colored, but she's not sure how she knows that and the images change before she really has a chance to think.
Orange sky.
Red grass.
She's-
Home-
She wakes up.
"Hey," the girl from before greets her, arms crossed over her chest. "Sleep well?"
Ciara blinks, her heart sinking as she recognizes the stranger-she's still here, still pestering. "Nope. I..." She trails off, not exactly sure how to describe everything she was just seeing-and feeling.
"Oh, were you dreaming?" the Ember asks, and Ciara nearly flinches, miserably confused. "Happens. It's wearing off."
"...what's wearing off?"
"Th-the thing," the Ember says, her lips twisting into a frown. "Can't remember what it's called. I…" her gaze goes vacant, distant. "Sorry, that's not helpful."
It isn't, it really isn't, but Ciara sits up and looks around anyway, before realizing that the cryptic stranger in front of her is the absolute leastof her problems. "Where the hell am I? You kidnapped me!"
"Relax! We haven't left earth-"
"We haven't left what?"
"-'s atmosphere," the Ember says, wincing. "It's just-we're-" she sighs, grimaces. "Look-proper introductions. Call me Ember. You're...Ciara." She fumbles over Ciara's name-Ciara can actually hear her stuttering over it-and then turns to the console...thing behind her. "This is my TARDIS."
"Your what?"
"TARDIS," Ember says again, slowly. "Time ship. Space...ship. Can go anywhere, any time. Not right now, though. We're on a mission."
Ciara blinks. "We?"
"I found you, now I have to find the others-there's three left, all of them spread out around earth. Scythe's probably in London somewhere, he always did like London-"
Scythe. The name sends a painful jolt through her temple, and she stands up, winces, shuts her eyes as the pain goes away and her stomach twists. She has to get out, get away. This girl is insane. All of this is insane.
"Wouldn't do that if I were you," Ember whispers, but she doesn't move from her spot by the console. "Ja-Ciara-"
The door's easy enough to unlock. It just-
-it just moves, unlocks like any normal door, except that when it does it swings outward to reveal nothing.Nothing but a big black empty void filled with stars. Nothing but stars for miles and miles until they're all that she can see.
Ciara's jaw drops.
That's definitely not normal.
"Well," Ember mutters, "I did say we hadn't left the atmosphere."
Ciara curses. There's emptiness all around her and it's terrifying and big and-well, a void, but she steps forward with her arms pressed tight to the walls on either side, looks out, watching the stars.
Space is terrifying and incredibly beautiful all at once.
It's too much. She's shaking as she pulls back, the urge to run thrumming in every muscle.
"It's like I said before, Ciara, I know you," Ember says. "If I'd kept us on earth you would've opened the door and run away before giving me the chance to explain things."
"Explain things," Ciara repeats, her lip curling. "You want to explain this?" She waves her arms around, takes a step toward the console and leans against it. "We're in a spaceship. Above earth. In space."
"So what? Gods, doesn't take much to shock you, does it?"
"An hour ago I was in DC!"
Ember waves her hand. "DC. DC is boring. I can take you to different planets! Space malls-space shopping! Gallifrey! We could go home."
Gallifrey.
"I hate shopping," Ciara mumbles, rubbing at her temple, wishing that the headache blooming at the base of her neck would disappear, wishingthat Ember would start making sense.
But Ember just chuckles, oblivious. "I know. You always have."
"Stop doing that," Ciara hisses, scowling. "Stop acting like you know me."
"I do know you," says Ember, staring straight at her. She tilts her head, smiles a small smile. "I've known you for a long, long time, Ciara."
"I've never met you," Ciara says, but the moment she says it her stomach twists, anxiety curling in her chest, and she wonders if it's true, because it doesn't feel like it at all.
I know you.
...right?
Ember shrugs. She opens her mouth, then stops and bites her lip, expression shifting. When she looks back up at Ciara, she looks...worried. "Ciara, I can explain things, but you're not going to believe me."
"What…"
"The thing is...you're gonna have to," Ember continues, turning back toward the console, her left hand frozen over one of the big gold buttons. "'Cause sooner or later, the-damn it, what's it called? Nevermind-it's gonna run out and trustme, you don't want to know how that feels. Like regeneration, but worse."
Regeneration.
Orange sky.
Gallifrey.
The world tilts sideways.
Ciara leans backward, her arms grabbing for something to fall back on, finds a chair underneath her and wonders for the briefest of moments where it came from, was it there before?
Before…
Her head aches.
"Breathe, Ciara." Ember's suddenly at Ciara's side, easing her backward so that her head's against the wall, snatching away the tangles of bright hair that fall into her eyes. "Breathe. Give yourself a second."
"Head hurts," Ciara whispers, hating herself for sounding so small.
"I know." Ciara looks up and Ember's frowning, her eyes pinched at the corners, her expression sad, pitying. "It'll be over in a sec."
She's silent then, and Ciara shuts her eyes. Her head aches and her locket is hot against her sternum. If she focuses, she can hear it again-the sound she'd heard before she'd passed out. The sound of two hearts beating steady, strong.
"You've never liked crying in front of me," Ember says softly, breaking the silence.
Ciara's hand flies to her cheek just as a tear falls down. She cups it against her skin, eyes narrowing. "Sorry-"
"You don't have to be." Ember backs up. "I just-" She sighs. "I dunno how to start."
"Start?"
"Explaining things," Ember says, "'cause it's a long story, and when I first started remembering… I thought I was going insane. I opened my locket by accident."
Ciara's whole body goes cold. "Your...locket?"
"This thing." Ember's thin fingers snatch at the silver chain on her neck. She reaches up and undoes the clasp, then twirls the chain, charm and all, through the air and catches it in her palm. "It had all my memories in it," she says. "All my real memories, I mean. Of who I was before."
"Your memories were inside a locket?"
"Yep," Ember says, popping the 'p'.
"Who put them there?"
"Ahh-" Ember winces, then snorts, shakes her head. "That's-I put them there. Turned myself human. Had to hide."
The pain in her head subsides, just a little, and Ciara leans forward, frowns. "You're not making any sense."
"I told you, I don't know how to explain this." Ember clenches her jaw. "It's all still so jumbled. Nothing makes sense. I'm not…" She trails off with a wince. "I barely know who I am. Woke up, remembered, and just knew I had to find you."
Ciara nods, not sure how to take that. Then she pulls her own locket into her hand. "They're the same." Nearly identical except for the color, small and round, flat on the side with the weird circles etched on the surface.
"Well yeah, they would be. Chameleon Arch does tha-oh! That's what it's called! Good brain, always thinking."
"Chameleon Arch?"
"Rewrites DNA. It turned us human, let us hide."
A now-familiar cold flares in Ciara's chest. "Us?"
"We're not human. None of us. You, me, Scythe, Sage, and Stele-we escaped Gallifrey and the Time War. They asked us to die, we chose to live."
Scythe.
Stele.
"We came to earth. Been here ten years. But it's all fading now, and soon... "
Sage.
Ciara places a hand over her chest. Her heart beats fast beneath her palm, and her shirt sticks to her hand as she pulls it away, wipes the sweat off on her jeans. "I'm human."
"You are now. But our species-back home on Gallifrey, we're different. Different biology. Two hearts. And you and I, we're called Time Lords. We-ahh, I did it again, didn't I? Ciara, just-"
"Stop," Ciara snarls, curling forward as the pain comes again, the headache going all the way down her neck and into her shoulders. "Just stop."
It's too much, all of it.
Everything burns and Ciara squeezes her eyes shut, waits for unconsciousness to come and take everything away.
Except it doesn't come. She just...hurts.
Time Lord.
"This would be easier if you'd just open the locket," Ember murmurs. "You'd start remembering-really remembering. It would stop hurting."
Something's holding her back.
She's not sure she has a reason not to believe Ember, really. She wouldn't, except that a second ago she opened a door and saw nothing but stars. This is a spaceship. And she's-an hour ago she wouldn't have believed in spaceships and stars within her reach but now everything's changed and her head is spinning and she's just...
She's human. Right?
Right?
"You believe me, don't you?" Ember asks. "Cause I promise you, Ciara-I'm not lying. I'd never do that."
That's exactly what a liar would say, Ciara thinks, but she smothers the thought almost instantly.
"Just open the locket, Ciara."
"I can't." Ciara looks up at her, wincing, her hand grabbing the locket tight. "I'm sorry. I just… it doesn't feel right. I can't."
The chain breaks.
And Ciara gasps as the locket falls in her lap, the chain slipping through its loop and falling to the floor with a soft clink. The broken half of the charm-the burned half, the one scorched by a fire she can't remember-comes face up on her jeans. She just...stares at it, traces a thumb over the circular pattern on its face.
"It's broken," Ember mumbles, her voice trembling. "Oh...oh, that's not supposed to happen."
"There was a fire," Ciara says slowly, the memories muddled. "I was fourteen. I've always had the locket. It was an heirloom. My grandmother's."
Ember's gaze is absolutely cold when she looks at Ciara. "You really believe that?"
"I know my own family," Ciara snaps back.
"Really? Then what were their names? What did they look like? How old were your parents? When did they get married?"
"I...I don't-" It's too many questions, she can't-
Everything's fuzzy-
"If they're really your family, you have to know all that," Ember says, stepping backward. "Your memories are fake and I can prove it, Ciara-you can't really remember any of that, can you? You've never been able to. All your life, you've never been able to recall anything about where you come from."
"You-"
"Broken," Ember whispers, still staring at the locket. "Burned. Jade, you clumsy idiot."
Jade.
"My name's Ciara," Ciara says, massaging away another headache, and Ember just sighs.
"You're so stubborn," she mumbles, grumbling as she walks back over to the console. "Well, guess we're off."
"That's it?" Ciara's eyes widen. "You're just...dropping me off?"
Ember snorts, both hands lifting so that she can pull her golden hair into a bun. "Is that what you want?"
"Home," Ciara says slowly, the word clumsy on her lips, heavy on her tongue. "I...I don't know."
"Doesn't feel right, does it?" Ember asks, hums when Ciara nods. "Thought so. You've already started to remember-those headaches you're getting? They stem from your old memories resurfacing."
"But...why? You said if I opened the locket-"
Ember shakes her head. "We programmed-well, I programmed the Arch with a time limit. Pass that time limit and the locket starts leaking, memories start resurfacing. Eventually you won't get a choice. And it hurts, Ciara. Getting all that information forced on you hurts."
"'Like regeneration,'" Ciara echoes, wincing. "What's regeneration?"
"Something that requires a really, really long explanation that we don't have time for,." Ember answers with a snort. "Well, we do have time, but I'm bored. Stars are only pretty for so long, y'know?"
She doesn't. Ciara could stare at those stars forever.
Ember pulls a switch and the whole ship moves, wheezing and groaning as it does. At least, it feelslike it's moving-it's making sounds like it's moving. Ciara doesn't really feel anything, but there's a buzz beneath her skin, and as she stands up she sways slightly, grabs onto the console for support.
The whole thing ripplesbeneath her palms and Ciara jerks backward, gasping, nearly falling over as she gets away from the console.
She stares at it, pulls in a sharp breath, and gets the strangest feeling...the ship is laughing at her.
"She's just saying hi," Ember says, a huge grin on her face. "You can go explore, if you want. She won't bite. She's nice, I promise." The way she says it-like she's talking to the ship. Like it can really talk back.
Ciara looks behind Ember, toward the closed door right behind her and the other door to her left. All of the doors are closed, but there's...a lot of doors, actually. And smaller details too-a ladder off to one side, going down below them. A ladder above them, but it's dark where it leads.
The whole place is sort of golden, but in a dark way that's not overwhelmingly bright. It's nice-or it would be, if it didn't look so much like a spaceship out of a comic book.
A very dull-sounding tone rings in Ciara's ears as she walks away from Ember, half-way to picking one of the random doors. Something pulses through her, an unhappy sensation, not angry just...moody. And Ciara blinks.
"What did you say this ship was called again?"
"It's my TARDIS," Ember says proudly. "Why?"
"I just...felt...something." It sounds lame. Her cheeks flame when she says it, which only brings another audible tone, this one a bit lighter, softer.
Ember chuckles. "Yeah," she says, and Ciara can almost hear her smiling. "Yeah, she does that."
"But...it's just a ship."
"Nope-wrong wrong wrong, couldn't be more wrong. Much more than a ship. She's...well. It's hard to explain. She can hear you, though. She knows who you are. She's just confused, that's all. Can't you hear her?"
Ciara turns around. "Hear her?"
"Playing hard to get? You'll figure it out eventually," Ember grins again, waves her hand toward one of the doors. "Hey, Ciara?"
"Hm?"
"Thanks for listening to me. I know it's...I know it all sounds crazy."
None of it makes sense. "Crazy" is such an understatement that Ciara's not even sure how to respond for a second. "I mean...it is."
Ember laughs. "Yeah. Guess so."
Ciara disappears. The door shuts behind her.
She's not sure what to expect when she walks into the next room. A bedroom isn't it.
And neither is the voice that hums in her head, gentle and full of kindness.
Rest.
She makes it all of five seconds, makes it until the door closes and Ciara disappears. Then her entire body slumps over and she shoves her hands under her eyes, leans into the console and lets out a shuddering breath, her chest constricting, her eyes warm with unshed tears.
She curses.
Her TARDIS hums quietly, wordless, reassuring.
"That didn't go at all like I wanted," Ember murmurs, groaning. "She just-she doesn't get it yet, and I'm bad at explaining…"
Could have rehearsed more.
"We practiced a dozen times!"
She's stubborn.
"Always has been," Ember grunts, tracing a line down the console. "Damn."
Where to next?
"Track Scythe's signal," Ember says, straightening. She rolls her shoulders, moves to adjust the side panel on the other side of the console, scowls. "It's brighter than before. That's not good."
Almost time.
"Yeah. Either he's starting to remember on his own or…"
Or it's too late.
Her hearts skip a beat. "Yeah."
You're worried.
"Of course I'm worried," Ember snaps, "Jade's not herself and I have no idea where the others are. I can barely keep everything straight. It's all too much."
I'm here.
"I miss Jade."
She's sleeping.
"Oh? Good. She looked exhausted."
I'm here.
"I know," Ember smiles, patting the console. "And I'm grateful."
Should I hurry?
"Probably for the best," Ember says, but she scowls when she looks in the direction Ciara went. "I'd hate to wake her."
Soon.
"Yeah," Ember sighs. "Hopefully."
Hope. She's gone a while without it-bright flame burning inside her, sparks lit by the voices of her friends.
It'll only get brighter from here.