Chapter Three

It had become a regular thing on a Thursday night; everyone piling into Room 7 in Block B for a study session, followed by a short session in the campus bar, drinking beer and playing darts. As there were classes the next day, none of them could risk drinking too much; it was really just a time to let off a bit of steam after studying and a chance to get to know each other better.

Somewhere along the way, they had managed to draw another two cadets into their group - one was Gonzales's roommate and was called Erica Dawson; the other was Hank's roommate, Ted Myerson. Hank, Ted and Rick Evans all lived in Block B too so they brought chairs with them for the session and the girls took over the sofa, with only a little grumbling from Starsky. It was a squeeze getting all seven of them into one room but they managed it and soon some close-knit friendships began to develop. For Rick, it was a welcome relief to be away from his roommate, who for some reason seemed to dislike him intensely.

It took about three weeks for Gonzalez to confess her first name was Valentina; she hated it and preferred everyone to call her by her last name. For about a week afterwards, Starsky burst into song every time they met and sung to her, "Be my valentine, Valentina," which both irritated and amused her. By the end of the next week, he was calling her Be-My-Valentine as if it was all one word, by the end of the following week, he was calling her Bee and it stuck.

Starsky loved those study sessions; it not only made learning the course material easier, it also made it fun, and he loved seeing the way Hutch's confidence grew with each passing week. Hutch was a natural born teacher and the younger cadets quickly began to defer to his better knowledge in lots of subjects. Starsky took great pleasure in sitting back and watching his friend blossom into the person he was supposed to be. While Hutch had absolutely no patience with himself and was his own worst critic, he seemed to have endless patience when talking through and explaining any of their course work, particularly with Evans who, like Starsky, was finding the assignments quite a challenge.

Hank was also an asset to the group; with his pre-law knowledge he was quick to give them a clearer picture of how the legal system worked and was able to keep them all up to a good level of understanding of the Administration of Justice unit.

One Friday afternoon in their seventh week, Erica and Bee asked Starsky if he'd help them get to grips with the assault course ahead of the next PT assessment. He was happy to oblige and helped them by suggesting different techniques that might help them tackle the various sections.

It was as both women were attempting the monkey bars that something happened. They were on their third attempt – Starsky had twice lifted them up and caught them when they were about to fall. Finally, Erica made it to the end and was climbing down the other side as Bee started. Bee's hand slipped and she looked like she was about to fall so Starsky stepped up and grabbed her. As she slithered down his body, they both felt a momentary frisson. Bee blushed and tried to step away. Starsky, caught completely off-guard, held on to her for a second before reluctantly letting her go.

"I can't believe I made it!" Erica said, as she landed on the ground. She had completely missed the moment, which both Starsky and Bee were relieved about.

"Well done," Bee said. "I'll get it next time. I think I've had enough for today."

Erica came over to the two of them and beamed at Starsky. "Thanks so much for your help, Dave."

"You're most welcome," Starsky said, adding a little bow to his words. "I'm happy to help anytime."

They started walking back towards the accommodation blocks. As they neared Block A, Bee said, "I think I left one of my notebooks behind last night. You go on ahead, Erica. I'll catch up with you."

"All right. I'll hit the shower then you can have it after me."

Erica headed off and Starsky and Bee walked in a slightly uncomfortable silence to Block B and on to his room. He opened the door and held it open for her as she passed through. Bee went straight to the sofa and sat down. Starsky hung awkwardly near the door.

"I think we better talk about what just happened before things get any weirder," Bee said with a rueful smile. "Come and sit down."

Starsky came over, with all sorts of thoughts buzzing around his head – Should he apologise? Did she think his reaction had been inappropriate?

"So?…"

"I like you," Starsky decided to stick with what was simplest. It was the truth.

"I like you too, Dave…a lot…but I'm not looking to get involved with anyone."

"Why not?"

Bee took his hand. "I'm sorry. I don't think I can afford the distraction at the moment. I really want to do well here. I've got to come out near the top if I'm going to stand any chance of being taken seriously. I really want to be a detective and as a woman I'll have to work extra hard for it…Maybe in a few years…but right now, I gotta stay focused…Do you understand?"

Starsky nodded. "I'm sorry about it. I wish things were different but I do understand."

"Thanks. I-"

Just then the door opened and Hutch came in. "Oh, sorry, am I interrupting? I can come back."

Bee stood up, quickly letting go of Starsky's hand. "No, that's all right. I'm just on my way out." She spoke to both of them but looked at Starsky. "See you for dinner, as usual?"

He grinned at her with his usual bright smile. "Sure, see you later, as usual."

"Good." Bee nodded to Hutch and left.

As soon as the door closed, Starsky's face fell and he stood up. He went into his room and Hutch heard him throw himself onto his bed. He followed him and stood in the door way, looking at his friend. Starsky was laying face first with his head buried in his arms.

"You okay?"

Starsky moved his head slightly so Hutch could hear him as he said, "No…Something happened between us and then I asked her out and she said 'no'."

"I'm sorry, buddy."

"Thanks…Don't worry. Just leave me be for a while. I'll be bright and breezy later."

Hutch frowned and went and sat on the bed next to Starsky. He placed a hand on Starsky's ankle – a gesture he had learned from Starsky and still found oddly comforting. "You know you don't always have to be bright and breezy around me, don't you? This me and thee thing's supposed to be two-way…I know I've needed a lot from you since I've known you, and you've given and given, but I don't want you to think it's always gotta be one-way."

Starsky rolled over onto his side and propped himself up on his elbow. He regarded Hutch with a quizzical look. "Never thought it was one-way, babe. You and me – everything is straight down the middle, fifty-fifty. I know you've got my best interests at heart and you know I only want what's best for you."

"Yeah, I know that. Just wanted to be sure you know it goes both ways."

Starsky nodded and smiled. "Message received."

Hutch smiled back. "Good."

Starsky sighed and his smile lost some of its brightness. "I really like her, Hutch. She's pretty and smart and funny. I really like her."

"I know. I'm sorry she wasn't interested."

"She said she likes me but she wants to focus on her studies."

"So, it wasn't a no-never?"

"Nah, it was a maybe in about a hundred years," Starsky said, with a chuckle.

Hutch smiled. "At least, you can smile about it. You gonna be okay with her still being in our group? Is it going to be awkward?"

"Nah, I just gotta try to think of her as friend and carry on like we have been. It'll be okay."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Before they knew it, the long weekend break at the end of the first block of training was around the corner. There would be exams on the Wednesday and Thursday and then they would have a long weekend off. Everybody was due back on campus the following Wednesday. Bee was going home to see her family as she had lots of younger brothers and sisters who were missing her; she invited Erica to tag along. Ted was heading home to Phoenix for the break. Hank and Evans were going to stay on campus but arranged to meet Starsky and Hutch at The Pits over the weekend.

All of them got together as usual on the Thursday night but went straight to the bar as they were allowed a break from studying. They all talked about the exams and how they felt they had all done.

"I've definitely failed AOJ," Evans moaned into his beer.

"What with all the coaching you've had from the Guru here?" Starsky said, pointing at Hutch. "No way, Ricky. You'll have done fine. Don't worry about it."

"You think so?" Evans looked at him for reassurance.

"Yeah, kid, you'll be fine. Come on. Let's have a game of darts."

Starsky led the young man over to the dart board and quickly managed to divert him from brooding over his imagined failure. Hutch watched and wondered. "How does he always stay so positive?"

He wasn't aware that he'd spoken out loud until Erica spoke: "Yeah, he sure is amazingly positive. Nice guy."

Hutch turned to find that he and Erica were the only ones left sitting at the small table in the corner. Hank, Bee and Ted had gone up to the bar to get more drinks.

"How'd you guys meet?" Erica suddenly asked. "Was it when you were driving hacks?"

"Er, no, a bit before that."

Erica's eyebrow invited more information.

"We met at the beach. Starsky used to go there to paint and I used to go fishing. We sort of got to know each other over time."

"Oh, I see…You seeing anyone, Hutch?" she suddenly blurted out. "Only if you're not…I…that is I…"

Hutch held up a hand to stop her saying anymore. It was done gently and he smiled at her to try to soften what he was going to say. "I-I'm flattered…It's just I-I'm going through a messy divorce and I can't think about getting involved with anyone at the moment."

Erica sighed. "I'm sorry to hear that…But you didn't say never…so…you won't mind if I ask again some time?"

Hutch smiled and blushed slightly. "No, I probably wouldn't mind…but maybe not for quite a long time."

"Okay…Hey, the boys have finished playing darts. Fancy a game?"

"Yeah, that would be great."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Starsky drove the few miles to his apartment and he and Hutch unloaded the car and headed up the steps. A few minutes after they arrived home, Evelyn and Fred came around to see them. Starsky invited them in for a coffee. As they sat down on the sofa, Hutch thanked them for looking after his plants.

"Oh, it was no trouble," Fred said, "We've enjoyed doing it, haven't we, Evelyn?"

"Yes, no trouble at all and Fred found your broken picture and fixed it for you. Hope you don't mind but it's such a lovely painting you've done, Dave, it seemed a shame not to have it hanging up because of the crack in the glass."

Starsky came over and placed a tray of coffees down on the table. "That's kind of ya, Fred. Thanks. I didn't get chance to go for glass before we started at the academy. I was planning on going out for some tomorrow but you've saved me a job. How much do I owe ya?"

"Oh, we wouldn't dream of charging you for it. Just one neighbour helping out another. You've helped us plenty in the past."

"Well, thank you. I appreciate it."

They chatted for a little while about how the two of them were getting on at the academy and what things had changed in the neighbourhood while they were gone. Evelyn was a regular source of information on all the comings and goings of the neighbours but she was sweet about it and kept tabs on them in a friendly way not a nasty one.

As she finished her coffee, Evelyn said, "We saw that car you told us about a couple of times."

Starsky instantly looked alert. "When was that and how often?"

Harold looked thoughtful. "About three times I reckon and all in the first couple of weeks after you left. Haven't seen it since."

"And nobody tried to ask you questions or tried to get in here?"

"No, dear, it's all been fine." Evelyn turned to Hutch and patted his knee. "Hopefully, that young lady has understood that it's time to leave you be. I'm sorry it didn't work out between you but you can't force someone to love you, can you."

"No, you can't," Hutch said. He squeezed Evelyn's hand.

"Well, never you mind, Ken. You'll find a lovely lady who will be just what you need and you'll be just right for her and then you'll be as happy as my Fred and me."

Evelyn stood up and Fred followed suit. As his wife headed towards the door, Fred winked at both of them and said, "Evelyn's quite right…as usual."

Once the elderly couple had gone, Hutch went to do the washing up. Starsky grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and came and sat at the kitchen table.

"We need to make a list of food we need for the few days we're here," he said. "I know we'll be well fed tomorrow but we need to get some supplies in."

"Good idea," Hutch said. He placed the last mug in the rack and came and sat down opposite Starsky. "That was sweet of Fred to mend your picture. I'm sorry it got broken but I'm glad it's mended now."

Starsky waved the pencil at him. "Stop that straight away."

Hutch looked surprised. "Stop what?"

"That guilt thing you do. It's not your fault. Anything Vanessa does is on her, not you."

Hutch nodded and held his hands up. "Okay, okay."

"That's better." Starsky added a few items to his list and passed it to Hutch. "Anything else you can think of?"

"No, think that will do."

"Now, before we go out…I want to know what happened with you and Erica last night."

Hutch blushed. "You don't miss a thing, do you?"

"Not when it comes to you and your welfare, no," Starsky thought. Out loud, he said, "No. So tell me what she said and what you said…although I think I got the gist from your hand saying stop to the poor girl."

"She asked me out. I told her I couldn't even think about it at the moment because of the divorce."

"How'd she take it?"

"Okay…she said she might ask again sometime."

"What did you say?"

"Okay but not for a long time…I was trying to let her down gently."

"You don't like her then?"

Hutch frowned and shook his head. "I don't know if I do or not…I just don't think about it."

Starsky put his elbows on the table and leaned his chin on his hands. He contemplated Hutch for a moment. "Don't think about what exactly?"

Hutch struggled to order his thoughts and feelings. "I can't think about…I don't think I can be with someone again…not for a long time, anyway."

Starsky sighed. "I understand…You've been badly hurt and it's going to be hard to trust someone new…but…just don't completely close the door on finding happiness, buddy. Not everyone is a psycho like Vanessa. Just promise me, you will give someone a chance one day."

Hutch swallowed. "I just want the divorce finalised and I want Vanessa to stop showing up here. Then maybe I can finish my training and get settled in my new job…and then maybe eventually I can think about that other stuff."

Starsky nodded. "Fair enough…I'll have to vet anyone you go out with, of course." This was said with a wink so Hutch knew he was trying to make him feel better. "Or better yet, I'll get Evelyn to find out all about anyone new. She'd be better at getting the low-down than asking for a criminal check on her."

Hutch couldn't help smiling at that. "Yeah, definitely. I'll run any potential girlfriends by Evelyn then if she says okay I'll know she's bound to be all right."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Hutch woke up early and lay staring up at the ceiling. He could feel a little knot tightening in his stomach as he again went over the conversation they had had with Starsky's neighbours last night. Why did Vanessa keep turning up? Why couldn't she just leave him alone? She had to know that they could never be happy together now.

Their marriage hadn't started off badly. They'd both been young and thought they were in love. Hutch was beginning to realise that, while he'd found Vanessa attractive and fun to be with when they were dating, his feelings really hadn't got much deeper than that. He'd thought that they would get closer as time went on, that they would become friends as well as lovers, but it hadn't happened.

At first, he had been so busy with his medical studies that he was happy enough coming home to Vanessa, who seemed to be proud of him for his hard work, but that gradually started to change. Vanessa insisted that they went out a lot for dinners and parties - she liked being surrounded by people and wasn't one for hanging out at home. He had met her at one of his parents' parties and he wondered why it hadn't occurred to him that she loved that lifestyle -it seemed obvious now. He'd just wanted to find someone he could make a home with, someone to help him get away from the life his parents had forced him to take part in – one from which he longed to escape – but living with Vanessa was more of the same.

Hutch craved a simpler life; he longed for the chance to cook together at home or cuddle up on the sofa after a long day of studying. To be fair, Vanessa had helped him study for his exams and at the time he had been pleased that she wanted to help him achieve his goals. Now he could see, it wasn't so much that she wanted to support him, it was that she was excited about the prospect of him being a doctor and the lifestyle she imagined they would have eventually.

When he'd started expressing his doubts that practising medicine was something he really wanted to do, she had brushed away his anxieties and pushed him to carry on. Finally, when he decided he had had enough and wanted to leave the course, she had been angry and accused him of being selfish, of throwing away all her hard work in supporting him, that he was throwing away their future. She couldn't seem to grasp how miserable he was. He hated knowing that he wouldn't always be able to help those under his care; and he didn't like the pressure from his parents and friends to go into any area of medicine that was well-paid rather than picking a field that meant something to him and fitted with his desire to help people.

In a mixture of stubbornness and rare rebellion, Hutch had quit and announced that he was going to become a police detective. Vanessa had gone ballistic. His parents, whom he mistakenly thought would want what he wanted if it made him happy and fulfilled, had reacted almost as badly and had taken Vanessa's side in badgering him. Eventually, after several unpleasant weeks, he had allowed himself to be talked out of applying to train to be a cop and had been pushed towards learning accountancy in a firm in Bay City run by a friend of his father's.

For a while his relationship with Vanessa settled back to an amicable one although it wasn't brimming with happiness. Vanessa didn't like Bay City, although she was pleased enough with the salary he was bringing home. He let her choose the apartment they bought, in the hopes of pleasing her. It wasn't to his taste and it never felt like home to him but she was happy decorating it and then throwing parties for his work colleagues and the friends that she made at the Bay City Tennis Club.

He had entertained thoughts that he had done enough to make her happy but it seemed that since his decision to leave medicine, nothing was good enough for her. She was always looking at possessions, holidays, lifestyles that other people had and wanting to make changes to their house, to their life together, and to him. He felt like who he was just wasn't enough for her.

She started to make snide comments to observations he made; there were little put-downs that became bigger as time went on. Somehow sensing that he was unhappy at the accountancy firm and probably worried that he might quit again and carry out his original plan, Vanessa had systematically set about squashing his confidence every opportunity she got. He could see now what she had done to him and the cause of it – at the time he hadn't been able to recognise what was going on or just how bad it had gotten. The last few months, they were together, she seemed to get pleasure from causing him emotional and physical discomfort as if punishing him for letting her down.

Part of him regretted that he had put up with it for so long, part of him was appalled at how he had let her get away with her treatment of him for what he hoped would be a 'quiet life'. He shook himself - there was no point second-guessing the decisions he should have made in the past. If he hadn't got low enough to want to end it all, he wouldn't have been rescued by Starsky and ended up with a best friend in his life and, at last, the chance to fulfil his dream of being a cop. There was no point looking back – it was time to move on. He just wished Vanessa would move on too.

Hutch looked at his grandfather's vest watch and decided he might as well get up. He felt like going for a run before the day got underway. He crept around the apartment, getting dressed, having some juice and tidying away his bedding from the sofa before he went to look in on Starsky. He ought to wake him up so he'd be ready for breakfast when Hutch came back.

"Starsky?"

"Mmm." The reply indicated that Starsky was not really conscious.

"I'm going for a jog around the block. I'll be about half an hour and then we can get breakfast started."

"Mmm, 'Kay. I'll get…up…in…"

Starsky's answer ended in a snore - Hutch didn't think it likely his exhausted friend would be up when he got back from his run. He shook his head and smiled fondly at the sleeping figure. If Starsky needed sleep, it was very hard to rouse him but he'd have to try waking him up on his return as they were going to visit Starsky's Uncle Al and Aunt Rosie today and Rosie would be disappointed if they were late. She wanted a full day with her nephew and was, no doubt, going to ply them with lots of comfort food.

Hutch went out, locking the door carefully behind him. He walked down the steps, turned left and broke into an easy loping jog. It was early and there was hardly anyone else around on what was a bright, crisp Fall morning. Hutch breathed the cool air in with pleasure and smiled.

He didn't notice the beige sedan parked a few hundred yards away. If he had turned around, he might have seen a man in dark clothing and a low hat get out of the car and quickly make his way across the road in the direction of Starsky's apartment.

As he pounded along the pavements, Hutch found himself relaxing. The gentle exercise was helping to clear his mind and allowed the unwanted thoughts about Vanessa to slip away. As he turned left for the third time, bringing himself back towards home, he heard sirens and saw a fire truck go whizzing by. He felt a shiver run down his spine and unconsciously quickened his pace.

At the corner he turned left again and could see the truck had stopped not far from Starsky's apartment. He heard more sirens and an EMS unit came speeding past and came to a halt beside the first vehicle. Hutch swallowed as he noted the position of the trucks and broke into a run. He came to a horrified stop as he sighted the apartment – flames were licking one side of the building and smoke was pouring out of the front door and one window. The pump had already been connected to the water hydrant and fire officers had begun spraying the building.

Hutch moved forward but was stopped by a fireman.

"Sir. You need to keep back."

"That's my house! My friend's inside!"

He tried to push past the officer but was prevented by strong hands.

"We've got two officers searching the building. They'll find him."

Hutch swallowed and kept his eyes locked on the front door. He heard his name being called and found Fred and Evelyn standing to one side. He moved closer to them but kept his eyes looking up at the house. Fred put a hand on his shoulder.

Fred said, "We called the fire service as soon as we saw the smoke from our kitchen window."

"Thanks."

"Is Dave still in there?" Evelyn asked with a voice that trembled slightly.

Hutch could only nod a response.

"Oh my."

It seemed like an eternity but suddenly two figures wearing breathing apparatus came out of the building. As they emerged, Hutch could see that the second one was carrying Starsky over his shoulder and Starsky was clearly unconscious. He was handed over to the paramedics, who began checking his condition. Hutch moved as close as he could, without getting in the way, and looked down at his friend in shock. Starsky's face was pale and streaked with deposits of ash. At first, Hutch wasn't sure he was breathing but then he saw the paramedics place an oxygen mask over Starsky's face and knew that he must be breathing on his own.

Sensing his presence and interest, one of the paramedics started asking Hutch questions about Starsky – his name, age, general fitness and any known medications. Hutch could barely think but he tried to answer as best he could. He watched as the paramedics started to load Starsky onto a trolley and headed towards the back of the ambulance. Abruptly, Hutch broke out of the trance he had been in and followed them over to the truck. "Can I come with you?"

"Are you family?"

"I-I'm his friend. W-We're roommates. Please, I want to stay with him until I know he's all right."

The paramedics exchanged looks and decided to take pity on Hutch. His distress was obvious.

"All right. Hop in."

He climbed in the back and strapped into the seat indicated by the paramedic. The other man closed the doors and went around to the front and got in the cab.

"All set, Bill?"

"Ready as we'll ever be," Bill replied.

Within seconds the unit was rushing through the early morning streets on its way to Memorial Hospital. Hutch placed a hand on Starsky's arm and looked at his friend's pale, still face. He noticed his hand was shaking. Not sure if he still believed in a God he hadn't talked to in a very long time, he nevertheless started praying for the silent figure lying in front of him and continued his silent pleading all the way to the hospital.