Author's Notes:
Hi there! This is the first chapter of a Zutara fanfiction I have plotted out. It takes place following the end of the final episode and is not influenced by the comics (as I have yet to read them). There will be moments of Kataang, Maiko, Sukkan throughout the story. Semi-AU in the sense that everyone is aged up to be 18+. More of a slow burn, with the first two chapters acting more as a prologue to the grittier (and sexier, woo!) stuff I have planned. It's my first fanfic, so I'm excited to share it with you all. Any and all feedback is appreciated.
I do not own the rights to A:TLA.
The joy in the air paired deliciously with the setting sun's warm, summer rays. The newly anointed Fire Lord found himself grateful for the opportunity to bask in this glow of peace. It had been possible all along - peace.
His eyes flicked away from the window and landed, brimming with fondness, on the group sprawled about in his uncle's tea shop.
Laughter rang out as Toph quipped with Sokka, wit exploding like a firecracker. Zuko hadn't quite caught what she said, but by Sokka's flaring nostrils, he could tell it struck a nerve. Suki, skin flushed a deep scarlet, clasped her hands over her mouth in an attempt to stifle snorting laughter. Aang's laugh echoed loudest, the cadence vaporizing all the evil in the world. And then there was her.
Katara.
She flashed him a toothy grin. His heart thundered in his chest with the ferocity of a Sun Warrior's drum. The moisture in his throat evaporated as uncertainty crept into him. He gave a tight-lipped nod back, returning in haste to the tea he had been brewing.
It wasn't the first time her, or the thought of her sent this pulse of...vulnerability through him. He had been wrestling why, exactly, for quite some time. Zuko initially classified it as fear but knew it differed from the fear shrouding his adolescence. He had gone through this budding feeling with his uncle, who suggested Zuko may be trying to push himself away from friendships he may still feel unworthy of.
Guilt hangs heavy on your heart, Fire Lord Zuko, Iroh had told him. But it is a good thing; it means you care more than most.
Zuko conceded, he did hold guilt close, but he pressed that it was heavier with Katara. And every ounce of him felt terrified by it. He remembered Iroh's mouth flew into a half-smile before he nodded, chewing his next words carefully: Care comes in many forms.
Vague advice for a more clear-headed Zuko, as per usual.
With a flourish, Zuko poured out earthy jasmine tea. Hands once coarse and mean delicately arranged clay teacups and saucers on a serving tray engraved with little gold leaves. His uncle had shown him how to move with intent, but also gentleness. Tea serving a definition of caring that Zuko held familiar, found simple.
"You work so hard, nephew. You deserve to relax with your friends as well." Iroh, as if summoned by thought, appeared behind him from the tea shop's storage area. He held his hands behind his back, shifting an item between them—the grin on his face painted with mischief.
"Uncle, do I even want to know?" For a brief moment, his eyebrows furrowed, cup faltering a little in his hand. Zuko honed in on the inclination to anger, remembered his breath, and regained composure.
"Now, nephew, this is a celebration," Iroh whipped from behind him a rather expensive looking bottle of sake. "And celebrations are for letting loose!"
The young ruler exhaled. "Should I go grab some glasses from the back?" Zuko's breezy response sent the grin on Iroh's face ear to ear.
"I grow prouder of you still." The old man placed his free hand on Zuko's shoulder, a tender squeeze following. "I will get the glasses." With that, Iroh sauntered into the kitchen.
"Zuko, hey! Get over here; it's your turn to be bullied by Toph." Sokka bellowed, waving over the once banished prince.
"Pipe down, boomerang bitch, you're still in my hot seat." Toph leaned forward, bringing down her foot. The ground beneath Sokka's floor cushion sunk in, swallowing him up to his waist. Although a trick Toph tried time and time again, it never ceased to gain a reaction. Zuko doubled over, laughter bubbling up straight from his stomach. The rest of the Gaang, save Sokka, joined in - a chorus carrying through the Jasmine Dragon.
"Oh, ha ha. Like she's never done that before."
"It just never gets old." The Fire Lord choked through.
"Hey!"
"Yeah, Snoozles, never gets old!" Toph cried.
"Nonono, I mean this." Zuko's laughter sputtered to rest, his tone melting to honey, rich and warm. He gestured to the group; arms spread wide. "This. It's— it's nice. I don't think it'll ever get old."
There was a soft pause, a moment to soak in the words - the group as a whole unused to such casual affection by the fire bender.
"Zuko's right. It never gets old." Aang's voice, refreshing and steady, chimed in. He flashed a thumbs up.
Katara followed with an empathetic, "Zuko…", sending his stomach into a series of flips.
He brought his hand up to scratch behind his head, eyes to the ground, the discomfort of vulnerability set into his limbs.
"Don't get all soft on us now, fancy pants," Toph lifted her foot as she spoke, forcing the earth to spit out Sokka. "Bring that tea over her for us, and I'll make you regret those words. You can sit riiiiight by me."
She broke the moment, so he didn't have to. Zuko appreciated her tendency to know exactly when people's sureness shifted.
"Sit on thiiiiis side of me." She slid over, freeing the space between herself and Katara. "I'd much rather be on the outside." He caught mischief budding in the corners of her smirk.
He no longer appreciated her tendency to know exactly when people's sureness shifted.
With a sigh, Zuko lifted the tray and made his way over to his friends, serving them each a cup. He planted himself, cross-legged, between Toph and Katara.
"You know, Zuko, if someone would have told me three years ago you would one day serve me tea? I would think that person had gone too many days on cactus juice. But, buddy, I'm glad that hypothetical person was right." Sokka tipped the teacup toward Zuko as he brought it to his mouth to sip the scalding liquid.
"Sokka, you're gonna burn your tongue," Suki warned as she blew gently on her cup.
The weapons master contemplated her advice and arrived at his answer. He set his cup down, pecked her on the cheek, "I don't know what I would do without you."
Suki remained blowing on her tea, but a grin found a way to her lips.
Zuko observed their interaction with a small smile. He held their relationship in high esteem, perhaps the only romance he had been close to that felt healthy and sure. He and Mai never found that footing in their romantic life. Their relationship, although passionate, had been brief.
"So, Fire Lord," Katara captured Zuko's attention. His mind was quick to tell him this was the first time she called him that. She was no longer smiling, but her eyes held a determined spark he had come to know all too well. "I want to discuss strategy."
"Nonsense!"
The group whipped their heads to face the sound of the voice. Iroh beamed at them, balancing a tray in his right hand. He had transferred the sake to a clay tokkuri, the long neck of it decorated with the insignia of the Fire Nation. Zuko recognized it as a gift his mother had given Iroh, a detail he appreciated.
"This is a time for celebrating and relaxing." Iroh continued.
"But we have so much catching up to do! Only Aang has been back to the Fire Nation; I'd like to start preparing for when we go to help. " Katara protested.
It was true, Zuko had generally only seen Aang since his coronation. The Avatar would fly in for days at a time to discuss the dismantling of Fire Nation colonies in other parts of the world, teaching Zuko how to tactfully go about mending the refugee crisis his ancestors had created. It never ceased to amuse the two of them when they entered the Fire Lord's council room, together, as friends and allies. A series of severe conversations on tearing down the scars of imperialism were often led by the two friends giggling, reminiscing on their rough roots. While he had missed the others during this time, he was thankful for the Aang's consistent gift of friendship. There was no one else like him in the world.
"This is the Jasmine Dragon, not the Ba Sing Sae war room," Iroh said definitively.
"You know…" Aang tapped his chin. "Monk Gyatso would probably, maybe, say relaxation was a part of preparation."
"Monk Gyatso is pretty wise, Katara." Sokka nodded.
"Well, if Monk Gyatso would say that, I see no reason to argue." Katara sighed.
The Fire Lord watched as the tension of her body dissipated, her shoulders slouching forward. She was quite the "yes-man", always offering her assistance before considering herself. Katara's diligence on bettering the world was admirable, but even Aang knew when they deserved a break. Zuko was glad she didn't fight the idea of relaxation - he needed it himself.
"Let's get hammered!" Suki cried, beckoning Iroh over with a pantomimed lasso. The Dragon of the West gleefully obliged.
"Oh, I know the perfect game, I just have to find the rules…"
The four of them descended on Iroh, eager to begin a night of revelry the war had always robbed them of. Zuko hung back, savoring the moment. He would have to return to the Fire Nation soon; taking extended time away was not an option. It took much convincing from his uncle to even get him here in the first place. He was glad he took the chance.
"Enjoying your night, fancy pants?" Toph, who had remained uncharacteristically silent throughout the commotion, broke Zuko from thought.
"I thought you'd be all over that."
"I don't drink," She shrugged. "Don't like to be off-balance."
"That's fair. I'm not much of a drinker my —"
"Alright, enough bullshit." The Blind Bandit spat. She hit her fist to her chest, miming a beating heart. "What was that? I felt your...with Kata—"
"It was nothing. I'm just working on some complicated feelings. Not specific to anyone." Zuko shot back.
"No offense, but you always seem to be working on some complicated feelings." She threw herself down on the hardened dirt floor, arms crossed as a pillow behind her head.
He appreciated she didn't press on, but knowing Toph, she would certainly not let it die altogether. "I've had a complicated life."
"Ha! You sound like old Zuko!"
He chucked, murmuring out a sorry.
Toph shrugged. "I think it always has been and always will be complicated. For all of us. This night might be the easiest it gets." She flicked her hand in the direction of the majority.
Sokka furiously rummaged for a scroll of drinking games he had purchased at a Ba Sing Sae novelty shop. Katara and Suki tried to explain to Aang why he should not suggest Truth or Dare with alcohol. Iroh gleefully set up a deck of cards, knowing that everyone here would simply settle on his suggestion in the end.
Zuko found his eyes bouncing back and forth between Aang and Katara. Subconsciously, at first, but he realized how difficult it was becoming to look away. The fleeting thought of have they gotten together? crossed his mind. They had kissed, of course, in this very tea shop just months ago. That he knew, but Aang never disclosed any further details of anything to him. He watched as she placed a firm hand on Aang's chest, her fingers curling slightly over his pectoral. The Avatar was making her laugh about something, but Zuko's ears filled with his heart's pounding, he could not make out the joke. He did not like the feeling inside him.
"Zuko?" Toph nudged him, reminding the Fire Lord she was there.
His eyebrow twitched. "I think I'm going to get some fresh air."
Toph gave a thumbs up, which Zuko half-heartedly returned before sliding out the front entrance, escaping from the feeling that had started to warp inside him.
The crisp evening air embraced the Fire Lord as an old friend. He leaned forward, head resting on his elbows, onto the thick stone quarter-wall that lined the shop's front entry plaza. The great stone city stretched into eternity before him, decorated by banners of olive green and the glow of oil lanterns lighting up homes. With the site of the last beams of daylight disappearing beyond the Outer Wall, it hit Zuko how much he missed this city. This was home, in a way the Fire Nation had yet to be.
He rubbed his temples, the pang of anger that sent him outside cooled by the night air. Zuko had dealt with misguided, intense emotions cropping up as they pleased his entire life. It didn't exactly shock him that an unwarranted flash of rage crossed him as he watched the Avatar. It's an ongoing process of unlearning his conditioning. He just hoped to unlearn it sooner rather than later.
"You're not running away from us, are you, Fire Lord Zuko?"
Katara was leaning against the front sliding door of the Jasmine Dragon, arms folded across her chest, one eyebrow raised. Her hair was mostly down, save the signature hair loopies, and a low bun pinned with a jasmine flower barrette. She had opted for lighter clothing for the Ba Sing Sae summer, adorning her favorite forest green silk dress. The embroidered collar was lined with dark green vines, wrapping up her neck, while the sleeves and hem of the skirt were trimmed with gold.
Looking at her, Zuko felt a quiver of paranoia over being underdressed. He had gone for his simple Earth Kingdom tea server look, a far cry from the regal Fire Lord robes. And certainly less elegant than Katara's dress.
"I, uh, just needed some air. Is all. I'll be back inside soon." Anxiety prickled through him as the fact the two of them were alone set in.
Her face softened, and she strolled over to join him. Despite the dress being Earth Kingdom made, it flowed like water on her.
"I'm glad you're here," She turned her face, offering a smile. "We're all glad you're here."
Zuko smiled back, ignoring the tightness in his chest. "I am too. I needed this."
"How have you been? I've missed you."
A bittersweet sentiment. While he longed to always accept kind words from those he loved, his body still found ways to reject it. The years of betrayal and abuse fought hard to remain in his mind. He felt so undeserving of being missed by any of them. He turned away, looking back out to the city.
"It's been hard. I'm sure the Avatar has filled you in." A curt response. He unintentionally spat out "Avatar" like the two were enemies again. Katara stayed silent, but leaned back onto the quarter wall next to Zuko, propping herself up with her elbows.
His eyes widened as he realized how he had sounded. "I'm sorry, I didn't -"
She waved him off. "You're fine." She sighed, turning to join him in facing Ba Sing Sae. "I get it. It's been hard for me too."
His eyes darted to her, finding her expression somber with lowered eyes.
"Sometimes I feel like everything isn't real," her voice remained steady, but the tone dulled. "And that nothing good has actually happened to us. That I'll wake up and Sokka and I will be back in the Southern Water Tribe, back to fighting and back to war."
"Even if the future feels bleak, I can promise you that this," He gestured toward the tea shop. "Happened."
She gave a half-smile, eyebrows furrowed in question. "That was almost reassuring, but I wasn't trying to say the future felt bleak. Just that I - I don't want to go back," She shrugged. "I'm looking forward to the future."
Zuko's eyes cast down a glance to his hands, still coarse with the scars of his and Azula's Agni Kai. He didn't want to go back either. He had betrayed Katara once, beneath near where they now stood together. He was a part of the past she did not want to go back to. He violently rejected her compassion from the start, and yet, in the end, he owed her his life. These anxious thoughts welled up inside him, filling him to the brim; he felt as if he would burst.
"Do you still think I'm - are you afraid of me?"
A pause.
She let out a ridiculous laugh, belly-deep, and full of snorts. "Zuko, save me the drama, okay? It's not about you."
He looked up at Katara, who stood backlit by the sprawling night sky. She glowed with power, even without a moon in sight. In that instance, Zuko realized she had no reason to fear him; that wasn't what he had been feeling toward her at all. Even if he wanted to hurt her (which he didn't), he wouldn't be able to. She would best him every time.
He joined her with an airy, quiet laugh. "You're right. You'd destroy me."
Her laughter slowed. "It's not that! I mean, yes, obviously, but that isn't what I mean," she placed her hands firmly on his shoulders, squaring the two benders, forcing eye contact. "Zuko, you already went against everything you were taught. You helped us save the entire world. I'm not afraid because I trust you and you're my friend."
Katara, close enough he could smell a sip of sake lingering on her breath, cupped the sides of his face. "I was trying to say it's been hard, being alone. Being with everyone, including being with you, grounds me in the reality that this all did happen."
Her arms fell, a small smile curling up from her lips. Zuko stared at her, face still, eyes alive. Katara's smile wavered as he continued to stare beyond a point of politeness. She held his gaze. The wind whispered into the stars, carrying a magnolia scent from Iroh's garden. The heat of the air seemed to intensify, but he couldn't tell if it was from outside or in. His lips felt dry, so he wet them. He couldn't read Katara's expression, but she drifted closer.
Just above a whisper, lips parting, she exhaled: "Zuko?"
The stillness shattered, the Fire Lord grew painfully aware of just how long he stared. He snapped his head away, forcing out laughter. "Sorry, it's just that, uh…" He rummaged for an excuse. "You sounded like my Uncle!"
Katara, without missing a beat, pulled away with a scoff. "It's not only old men who can be wise; I'm Aang's advisor for a reason." She said, crossing her arms, looking up the other direction.
"I meant it as a compliment!" He insisted.
"Well, next time, don't act so surprised." She winked. "Come on, let's get back inside."
"I think I need another minute. I'll see you in there."
Katara squeezed his arm before making her way inside the shop.
Zuko subconsciously touched where she touched, his hand lingering in the spot as she watched her glide away. Of course, he hadn't been afraid of hurting her or any one of his friends. And of course she didn't fear him. He knew he was still working with guilt, but the Fire Lord had already proven he could navigate fear. He wasn't fearful at all. Iroh's words rushed to the forefront of his mind:
Care comes in many forms.
He wasn't quite sure what to make of it and growing frustrated; unwilling to tackle these thoughts tonight, he returned to the party.
Thank you for reading! I know that I skimmed a bit over Mai/Zuko and Aang/Katara, but I promise more aspects of those relationships will be included in upcoming chapters.