"It was summer when I saw your face, looked like a teenage runaway."
—Rollercoaster by Bleachers
"Hermione, would you please stop ignoring me now?"
Now? What do you mean now, it's only been two weeks, Hermione wondered.
Ginny Weasley looked like she was ready to burst into tears any moment now. The witch had been ignoring the redhead ever since the whole kiss cam fiasco. She knew it was pointless to do so, yet, she had no better option to express her anger. Hermione knew what had been her intentions yet, she couldn't find herself to move over this fully just now. The kiss cam had brought practical death on her shoulders, okay, maybe that was a little bit exaggerated but you got the idea of it.
Not only did she had to kiss none other than the pure blood prick, Draco Malfoy himself, but had to put up with his horrendous attitude that seemed to put the stupid banshee woman to shame.
Dare she mention she had to kiss him again and again to fight off a stupid burn?
How fucking bizzare.
The younger Gryffindor trailed behind her only to stop when Hermione flipped around, coming directly face to face with her. She clutched her books tighter to her chest keeping her face void of any emotion, she was still angry at her, after all. "What do you want Ginny? I'm quite in a bit of a hurry."
Ginny opened her mouth only to close it again. She could not believe she was this mad, even after two weeks. She fumbled with the book in her hands, running her fingers along the spine up and down in a repeated motion, truth was; she didn't want anything, just that the witch in front of her forgave her. "Oh- I well, I was hoping you could forgive me and then we can be like before." she said so quickly that if it weren't for Hermione standing so close to her, she'd have missed it completely.
The girl seemed flustered, Ginny. Her hair was messy and her eyes had dark circles under them, clearly defining her lack of sleep. For a moment, Hermione felt pity for her. Maybe she was being too hard on her, after all. Ginny, obviously, never wanted Hermione to be in a position like she was in currently, that much she could swear over anything. The girl's intentions hadn't been bad, only she hadn't thought of the complete consequences that would follow if something went wrong- another reason Hermione liked to plan out everything in full before heading into something.
A sigh escaped her lips. For a brief moment, her eyes closed and she rubbed her aching temples- maybe because of Ginny or maybe it was Malfoy, she wasn't sure which one it was. "I forgive you Ginny." Her eyes drifted to smiling girl in front of her. "It wasn't... It wasn't your fault, I-" she awkwardly rubbed the back of her neck, feeling her knots tighten with every graze of her finger on her skin.
"It's alright." The finality in her voice made Ginny jump, she crushed Hermione in a bear hug and after a few stumbles, Hermione smiled to herself, patting her friend's head in affection. "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, 'Mione!" Ginny rushed, tightening her hold on Hermione which made her laugh after so long.
"So now that you've forgiven me, can we talk about how good of a kisser Malfoy is?" Ginny wiggled her eyebrows in a suggestive manner which made Hermione widen her eyes.
"Ginevra Weasley!" Hermione smacked her book at Ginny, completely missing her target as she moved further.
Quidditch instincts.
"So he is that good?" Ginny smirked, knowing she already had her answer.
Hermione never answered her, but the blush on her cheeks gave her away.
It was true.
Draco Malfoy was a damn good kisser, so good that the word "good" was an understatement.
And that scared Hermione to her core.
~~~~~
Hermione felt the knots in her back tighten with every step she took towards her dorm. A long day of writing potions essays and solving arithmancy equations had drained Hermione of all earlier enthusiasm she had when she last saw Ginny. Her hands hung limp beside her, the only thing that securely carried all her books and thing was the bag slung across her body in a half cross.
She was sure her hair had decided to look horrible too.
The moment she set her foot inside the small cozy place, her nose picked up the smell of tea. Almost instantly, she was padding over to the little place they had reserved for a kitchen. You couldn't actually cook anything there— it was merely a place with a few cups and glasses in addition to the empty cabinets that had been placed there. Hermione never understood why would they have empty cabinets in a kitchen, Draco, however, had argued why did they even have cabinets in the first place.
Hermione had told herself that his option was probably more relevant, of course, she just hadn't said it in front of him.
The scene that awaited her made her eyes go wide— Draco Malfoy stood in his school shirt and black trousers, the same slytherin green tie dangling off his neck. He was reading a book held in his right hand, very attentively, dare she add but his left hand was empty— which confused her. The witch knitted her eyebrows together as she watched the boy, more man, still reading his book without even blinking.
He doesn't even have a wand, then how is he doing it? Hermione narrowed her eyes at him.
And then, it clicked.
"You know how to do wandless magic?" Her voice was bearly audible, her own shock was evident. Draco didn't even hear her, so this time, she mirrored her shock and spoke in a louder manner.
Which wasn't actually a very good idea because Draco snapped out of his book, his ears alerting at the sound of her voice, the stupid tea spilling over his hand as he knocked the cup off its pitcher with his elbow when he turned to the Gryffindor girl. Some of the tea even spilled on his book.
It was a disaster, really.
Hermione almost had a cardiac arrest, keyword: almost. Her hand flew to her chest just when she collected the courage to look at him. Gray met brown and instantly, there was tension. She waited for the usual slur of insults but it never came, it never did. Instead, Draco rubbed his temples and let out a throaty sigh. Hermione's eyes went over to his hand and she took in the horrible burn it had, an odd shade of red had made it's presence known on his icy skin by now.
Her hands fled to her mouth, she wondered why hadn't he spoken anything, no insults, no curses, hell, not even sending her crashing in a bloody window. Before Hermione knew what she was doing, she was already at his side, much closer than anyone would like for their taste. Her hand flew out to take his burning one, just as she whipped out her wand.
She was about to cast a healing spell when he pulled out his hand from her grasp, all so suddenly, it felt cold again to her.
"I'm fine." he spoke clearly, staring right into her eyes. He didn't say anything more as he picked up his book and walked off into his room without as much as sparing a second glance in her direction.
Hermione's heart ached for the hurt she had caused him, Malfoy or not, she had principles— and that included to not hurt anybody, even if that was a complete accident.
She knew she shouldn't have distracted him mid-process, it was bound to end up in a disaster anyway, no matter even if it was a small one.
What she didn't know what that Draco Malfoy was sitting with his back pressed to the door, his mind full of thoughts about a particular Gryffindor girl.
And, he hadn't even felt the searing burn yet.
~~~~~~
It had been all day and Draco still hadn't come out of his room, it was painful— not only the stupid burn that came along but also the mistake she had made earlier in the day, knowing that she had been the one to inflict pain on someone, even if that was by accident.
It was painful to know that he probably couldn't heal himself properly. She knew healing wasn't his cup of tea.
Being an ex-deatheaters meant you were made to harm, not to heal.
When her burn climaxed, she decided that's she couldn't take it anymore. Clad in her black t-shirt and blue jeans, Hermione walked over to the other room, she'd be lying if she said that she wasn't nervous, or worse, frightened.
A sharp pain shot through her body. Hermione didn't have a clue what it was, this was the first time it had happened. Ginny never mentioned this— the tingle on her lips intensified and she made a mental note then and there to ask the gingerhead in the morning.
Hermione was surprised to see his door ajar. Surprised, she tiptoed her way closer, completely surprised at what what she saw.
Draco was working on something, with further ponder, Hermione realised he was scribbling away on a parchment, a thick book sitting beside his right hand from which he scribbled, but that wasn't the shocking thing, the shocking thing was seeing his left hand wrapped up in a flimsy bandage lying flat on the bed. She saw that it was turning hard for him to do everything with one hand, he struggled to turn the page and then struggle even more when tried to dip the quill in the inkpot, splatering it all over the yellow parchment.
It was then, that she decided to let herself in. Draco's silver eyes instantly traveled to her, he took on her appearance and her presence in his room, it felt suffocating already.
Hermione's eyes went to his face, his eyes were clearly drained of the usual silver they held, they looked dull and tired, what confirmed her thoughts was the presence of dark circles under his eyes. His hair was disheveled and it looked like he hadn't gotten a decent amount of sleep in the last couple of days or so.
"What the fuck are you doing here Granger?" Hermione flinched at his words and realised something then and there - he wasn't wearing a shirt.
Dear Lord.
Hermione saw how he turned his pale back to her and rummaged around the room for something that Hermione didn't quite know. He was pulling at the drawers, opening the closet and looking over the bed for something—
"Oh," Hermione almost felt guilty again. Draco held a green shirt in his hand which he was already putting on.
More like, trying to put on.
"Why the fuck are you here? What do you want?" he barked at her, it amosot sounded like a whine because clearly, his arms were getting tired of struggling agsisnt a stupid shirt.
Hermione would probably regret this, surely will, she corrected herself.
Her feet took her to where he was standing and she held up her small hands in front of him, as if asking his permission to let her, let her. Her palms were mid air, right in front of his chest as she took a daring step closer to him.
Draco stood absolutely still, not even comprehending what was happening. His eyes were fixated on the witch before him, the same witch who had plagued his brain for quite sometime now, the witch who he had horrible fantasies about, fantasies he wish he never had, didn't have.
Hermione's hands were only millimeters away when he used his right hand to push her away, completely making her lose her balance and fall back on the bed. With a soft thud, she fell, making the bed vibrating slightly. "I can't do this Granger, get out of my room, get out of here, or I swear I'm going to do something we both will regret. Get out!" he yelled in her face, his voice was sharp and it made Hermione's heart ache. She focused on the rawness in his voice and the helplessness in his eyes.
She could only wonder what his heart was like right now.
When Hermione didn't move, he was already walking towards her, she saw him control a scream as he pushed the shirt on his body.
Draco held her by the elbow and pulled her to her feet, practically dragging her out of the room. He wasn't even looking at her, "Draco," she spasmed, "You're- you're hurting me! Let- let go!" tears gathered in her eyes but Draco wasn't looking.
He knew that if he made the unforgivable mistake of doing so, he won't be able to resist her, won't be able to not touch her, won't be able to control the demons inside him, won't be able to control doing something he'd regret the next day.
"GET OUT! STOP MESSING WITH MY FUCKING HEAD!" He yelled at her just when she practically pushed her out the door, but he didn't close it yet, oh no, not yet, he wasn't done yet.
"I HATE YOU, YOU MEAN NOTHING TO ME AND THAT NIGHT," Hermione knew damn well what he was referring to, "WAS A MISTAKE, OPENING UP TO YOU WAS A MISTAKE, JUST—" he saw the hurt flash in her eyes and instantly knew that he had stepped too far.
But to hell with it, right?
"Just go away Granger, just fucking go away," but his hoarse voice pleaded her to stay, to hold him close and tell him that he was going to be okay, that he was only human and that she was there for him, that at least somebody was there for him.
"Draco—" Hermione sucked in a sharp breath as she massaged her skin where he had held her tight. Draco's eyes shifted to her skin and he instantly regretted his actions, but what could he have done? If he didn't get her out of his room fast enough, he wouldn't live to see the light of the next day alone.
"Just go away, I mean it, your bloody game is over." he looked at her direct in the eye and slammed the door shut, but Hermione wasn't done with him. He thought that he could barge in her life and leave her be, well, he was mistaken. Hermione was already up on her feet, pouring at the door, "Stop pushing me away then, you moron!" she screamed, hitting the door till her fists hurt. Tears streamed down her face and she realised her throat was sore from all the screaming. "I just want to help you-" the words died in her throat as she sloushed herself down against the door, helpless and powerless, her shoulders shook softly as she wiped the teary mess on her cheeks, "I just want you to- to know that- I don't mean any harm," she whispered, putting her foreahed next to the wood.
On the opposite end of the thin wall of wood separating them, Draco sat on the floor, his knees pulled to his chest, an odd frenzy in his veins and a new kind of ache in his heart. He had heard everything she had said, even if she had whispered it to herself, he had heard it.
Truth was, all in all, Draco wanted to purposely push her away, out of his mind and our his life because that one night had been enough of a reminder of how fucked up he was now, so fucked up that he craved the touch and mere presence of her, like his throat would seal shut if he didn't get to her, if he didn't touch her. Yes he had regretted opening up to her that day, telling her that he was fucking pathetic? What was he even thinking? It had made him cringe in the morning, he had screamed, thanks to the muffliato, nobody had heard his pitiful cries.
And now, when she stood before him, in all her beautiful glory, inching closer and closer to the monster he had become, the monster his awful parents and Voldemort had forced him to become? Couldn't she see his difficult it was for him to seek the light again?
"Open the door, Draco-" Hermione's soft sobs brought him out of his bubble of darkness, he realized that she was still outside his door.
But why?
"Just- let me in- I want to help," he heard her bearly mumble, it was like the wind, if mistaken.
All he wanted to do was scream at her to fuck off with her Gryffindor courage and charisma. He wanted to bloody scream in her face to stop being so naive and get a fucking grip on herself. He wanted to yell at her for being in his dreams, his fantasies, his nightmares— everywhere.
She was everywhere and it made his skin crawl.
But his heart clouded his brain this time again, instead of screaming at her, he opened the door, causing Granger to fall ahead a bit, it was a momentary lapse before she caught herself. Silver met brown and he had cupped her face in his hands and pressed his cold lips to her own before she could register to anything, before he could regret, before they would both fall apart.
He bent back her head across his arm and kissed her, softly at first, and then with a swift gradation of intensity that made her cling to him as the only solid thing in a dizzy swaying world. His insistent mouth was parting her shaking lips, sending wild tremors along her nerves, evoking from her sensations she had never known she was capable of feeling.
And before a swimming giddiness spun her round and round, she knew that she was kissing him back.
Ecstasy, Draco thought.
And then, they were separated, forehead against forehead, pureblood with a mudblood, it didn't matter, it had never mattered. They both tried to catch their breaths without breaking their little stare of the aftermath.
And then she spoke.
"Would you let me heal your hand?" her hand was on his cheek, Draco closed his eyes for a fraction of a second before opening them. He let his good finger glide all the way up to her face, from her shoulder to her neck to the corner of her mouth. Nothing was said. Hermione lsed her eyes too, only briefly and softly clasped his good hand in her own, "Please." she spoke timidly, her warm eyes mocking him to say yes already.
When he didn't say anything, Hermione took the liberty to leave his side for a moment and go get her wand. Limply, she walked back to him, as she sat on the floor next to him and closed her fingers around her wand, she felt him draw absent patterns on her forearm, it felt like a daze and a misery at the same time because they were both doomed for nothingness, it was just that real. She took a moment to see his fingers carress the skin he had held tightly just minutes before. Hermione let out a sharp breath when his finger dipped in the crook of her elbow, tracing soothing patterns on it.
"Only if you heal yourself first."
It was like the wind, gone as quickly as it had come, a bearly there voice. But she had heard it, loud and clear like the howling of the wolves on the night of the full moon, not to be mistaken with the bark of the dogs.
Her breath was caught in her throat. Slowly, he saw her lift her wand and then murmur a spell he didn't quite catch, healing the slightly purple skin on her arm. Hermione let Draco admire it for a moment, giving him the chance to be satisfied. Only then, she began unwrapping his flimsy bandage, seeing how he flinched with every unfold. Still, she tried to be her best and it all very slowly. His pale hand was a dark shade of pink and red, a mix of the both.
"Episkey." she muttered and moments later it was as good as before, he flexed his fingers, admiring the power he was deprived off for hours. His eyes then went to Granger, he wouldn't say thanks to her, of course, she never expected him to, she it was no surprise when he didn't.
"Did you also feel the burn when you—" Granger spoke almost shyly, her big brown eyes bore into his. He didn't want to lie to her, it occurred to him that she was feeling the burn and that's why she came to him, made perfect sense to him.
And so he did was he was best at, he lied.
"Yeah."
But it was a big fat lie, because he hadn't even remotely felt the burn.
Maybe he just wanted to kiss her without a reason.
/
Hi, I'm back, quite quick, eh? This is literally 3500 plus words long so don't you dare say it's short. I need to work on after you next so don't expect an update anytime soon! This will be proofread in the morning, right now, I just want to sleep.
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