{We're going to change pace here and I'm going to try something different. I want your feedback for this so please leave a review over what you think!}

Home.

That was the first thing I thought of when I saw the N.E.S.T. headquarters. Home.

It seemed appropriate considering all things. I'd lived there for so long, found my calling within the professional world, and even my lover. I adored Optimus, there was no hiding there. He was my first and last thought of each day. But even with this unusual amount of chemical compounds within my brain, telling me I loved him, I still had my frustrations with him. Optimus had done nothing to gain my unexpected attitude; he was following orders. What brought on my new emotion was the fact I had no way to tell him that this was not what I wanted.

I did not want to return to the base, not yet. It hadn't been an entire week yet - something that could have ended up being detrimental to his health and my own. Not to mention that I had yet to take him to Seattle where my Aunt still lived as far as I knew. I wanted to see her again. She and my mother were identical twins, almost inseparable until... until my father. Seeing my Aunt all those years ago brought back the good memories of my mother - the woman I wish I could forget. Don't get it wrong: I loved my mother wholeheartedly, but I wish I could forget her swinging body dangling from that rope, pale. I wish I hadn't watched her jump out of the chair. I wish I hadn't heard that sickening crack of her neck. My Aunt made those things go away for a long time.

Now I had Optimus.

Or, I had most of him.

Part of being in a relationship with the leader of an alien militia required some sacrifices, and this was one of them. I could introduce Optimus to my Aunt when what needed to be dealt with was dealt with. Besides, I had paperwork to catch up on.

Optimus transformed around me without warning. I didn't need it anymore, knowing full well that he would keep me safe in his servo. My lover had grown silent since he shared the commlink with Ironhide and now I was beginning to grow worried. I knew he had contacted the base twice more after we started retracing our path back home. I didn't know why at first, but I did know when to keep my mouth shut, and the ride home was one of them. Neither of us slept. I felt heavy, close to very well snapping at someone even if it was the last thing I wanted to do to a soldier. They already had PTSD, I didn't need to make it worse.

I stood steadily on Optimus' hand as he lifted me up to the Catwalk. I easily slid down one of his digits. I quickly turned around and found relief as I looked into his blue optics. I needed to see him like this. Not as a truck, not as a human, but as the Cybertronian he was. I wanted to see him smile as I had on our trip. I wanted to see him relaxed; happy. But that was not how things went. Instead, I saw stress and worry etched into his faceplates. I could almost feel it, too. I was devastated our time was cut short - I was broken up over having to give him up! I let out a slow breath and swallowed down my tears. This was no time to cry. I leaned over the cold railing, my hands gripping tight, and just barely met Optimus' cheek panel. I pressed my lips against him for a moment before pulling away. A silent goodbye neither of us needed to vocalize. He turned away, looking about as disheartened as I felt.

"Director Ace," I heard a familiar voice from behind me. However, he was tense and his voice was heavy. I drew in a long breath and let that side of me close off. That was a part of me only Optimus got to see.

I turned around, addressing the Major that stood in front of me. "Lennox. What was so urgent that Optimus and I were required to return to base?"

"I'm guessing he didn't tell you," Will stated. His attitude was new, almost protective. Curious. He folded his arms behind his back. I caught a glint of the gold ring on his hand.

Stiff, straight. He's nervous. Angry. Formal clothing - meeting. Ring is polished. Special care provided; cherished. Shara.

My eyes analyzed the Major while my ears took their time to process what he'd said. 'He didn't tell you' was not a phrase I liked to hear as Director. What had I not been informed of? The only one who could have withheld information from me was Optimus. Surely he wouldn't do something like that - surely my lover would tell me of any kind of development.

"No, I suppose not," I returned cooley. It was difficult to remain calm knowing Optimus had omitted information from me. I would have to speak with him afterword.

"You gotta see this, Director. It's... we've never seen something like this before," Will said intensely. His dark eyes seemed to grow more furious the longer he looked at me. I wondered if this was his way of taking out his fear. It most likely was seeing as fear was frowned upon in a Military base.

I followed Will down the Catwalk and to one of the large screens commanded by the fast fingers of programmers. He leaned over the side of the chair and mumbled something. The woman sitting in the seat nodded and instantly began to type, putting whatever it was she was doing on hold.

Horror struck me as, one by one, picture after picture began to fill up the screen. Bright blazing images torched the screen while bodies close to ash posed for the photo. I felt my stomach churn uncomfortably while processing the images. And then, as the woman began to rearrange the images, I caught on to the sudden urgency and panic Lennox was displaying.

'A-Z-R-A-E-L' was spelled out in fiery chaos, displayed for the world to see. I felt my heart stop for a solid minute. My eyes couldn't process it - I couldn't understand. I knew I was meant to survive; that was already established. But this, this outright call-out of my name scorched into the Earth's surface. I felt my chest tighten and air leave my lungs.

"When was this done?"

"Within the last twelve hours, ma'am," Will informed. "I sent out the order to call you and Prime back."

"And... who did it?" I asked numbly.

It was all I could do when my mind was scrambled. That was my name - my name - burned into the Earth's surface. What was I supposed to do? I couldn't think of a proper reaction aside from this program-like statement going through my head on a loop.

Gain information, take action. Gain information, take action. Gain information, take action.

"Megatron, Director. Leader of the Decepticons. He's returned."

I couldn't look at the screen anymore. I turned away and paced the length of the catwalk, taking deep breaths as I tried to form some sort of understandable sentence.

"Fatalities? Publicity?"

"Eleven dead, seventeen injured. No news on any media reporting Decepticons. We're still receiving and reviewing data, ma'am," Will said as he followed me. "Director, maybe you should -"

"I'm fine, Major," I said quickly. "I want to be updated on any and all information reported to me, understood?"

"Yes, ma'am,"

"And I want a team ready to investigate any Decepticon attacks and an Autobot ready to go with them. They are to report to my office first thing tomorrow morning," I ordered. I turned to look at Will. "I want you to oversee them, Major. I trust you and Epps the most out of everyone. Pick any men you see fit - no less than three. I believe Ironhide would be more than willing to join the team."

"Understood, Director," Will nodded. "Permission to speak to you as your friend?"

"Permission granted,"

Will sighed and dropped his painfully straight posture. "You have to keep a low profile, Ace."

"I know that," I said. "I wasn't even gone for an entire Joor and was called back."

"No, not like that. I mean... Ace, you might have to evacuate," Will said. "There is always the chance that the N.E.S.T. base will be targeted and you are my number one priority."

"What are you suggesting, Will?" I asked.

"You need an escape plan," he said. "One that Optimus can meet back up with you. And a place for you to stay undercover while N.E.S.T. gets itself back together."

My distraction was suddenly cleared as I realized what Will was saying.

"Are you suggesting that I run?" I asked. "Will, I can't do that. You know I can't do that! This base, these Autobots, these soldiers are my responsibility!"

"Ace -"

"No, Will. If I'm your number one priority, then that just means you keep me safe. That doesn't intel where you keep me safe," I said. "So I'll be damned before I leave Optimus, or Bumblebee, or Ironhide, or Ratchet, or Skids, or Mudflap! I will not be the first person to leave this base, William Lennox, I damn well better be the last. As your Director, am I understood?!"

Will nodded slowly. He almost looked frightened. "Understood, Director Ace."

"Good. Keep me updated," I said.

I walked past him, going down the metal stairs. My fists were clenched so tight I felt then cutting into my palms. There was a residual itch along both my arms. My toes curled as I tried to resist the urge. I promised Optimus I would try to get better - I kept my word. I let out a harsh breath and released my hands, but I knew that wouldn't send away my anger. I needed Ironhide for that. I made my way out of the main hanger, knowing exactly where my training buddy would be. I started for the secondary hanger while greeting a few soldiers along my way there.

Ironhide was relatively easy to spot, his transformed GMC TopKick 6500 Pickup model becoming nearly as familiar as Optimus. Speaking of which, Optimus was speaking with his Weapon's Specialist when he noticed I was approaching. Both ended their conversations and their haloforms buzzed into existence.

"Azrael," Optimus said. His voice was softer.

I was furious with him. How could he have kept that from me?

"Don't," I said. I held up my hand more to block me from seeing his face. If I saw him, I would break, and I didn't feel like crying. My focus was on Ironhide. "You up for a few rounds in the ring?"

"Li'l lady, I'm a Weapon's Specialist. I'm always down for a fight," Hide said while hammering his fist into his other hand.

"Good. I'll meet you there,"

And I turned around. I didn't have any more to say - there wasn't any more I needed to say. Not in front of Ironhide. I would deal with Optimus later. My legs felt hollow as I thought of that. What was I going to say? Should I just scream at him? Hit him? God knew he would feel it. I just wanted him to know what it felt like - he left me out of something so goddamn important! I couldn't understand why he didn't just tell me. Why did I have to find out through Will that Megatron was back? What was so wrong with Optimus just telling me himself?!

It took all I had not to turn back and scream at him. I could still feel his eyes watching me, burning into my back. I huffed and walked just a hair faster than before. Somehow, that didn't stop him from catching up.

"Azrael," his voice came from behind me. I could hear him walking faster until he could grab my hand. I pulled away from him, whisking around.

"What?" I snapped. "What could you possibly want to tell me, Optimus? Because apparently there wasn't much you wanted to tell me before we came back to base!"

The confusion on his face only made me angrier.

"I do not understand,"

"Why was it that I had to find out through Will of all people that Megatron had come back? And not only that, but my name was scorched into the earth?! Was that not deemed important, Optimus? Or did you want to save me the stress of doing my job?" I shouted.

I was beyond livid with him, but there was that underlining guilt of yelling at him that came from the love I felt for him. I couldn't stay there - I would say something I'd regret sooner or later. I knew myself too well. I let out another jagged breath and turned back around. I had a meeting with Ironhide that I wasn't planning on missing.

Pain was a good distraction. I'd found that out when I started scratching my arms. That physical pain was so much more tolerable compared to the aching in my chest or the emotional void in my body. Every drop of blood and sweat was worth it when it let me escape the reality of my situation - I was fucked. Emotionally, I resembled a FUBAR; fucked up beyond all recognition. Perhaps physically, too, considering my desperate need of pain to distract me emotionally.

Ironhide wasn't a light hitter. I had discovered this upon our first encounter in the ring. And as I walked out of the training room with the Autonoxiatry covering nearly the entirety of my torso and left arm, I found that helpful distraction quickly dissipating. But I was too tired to care much anymore. Ironhide had drained me of any and all anger I had beforehand - a gift of his, I was convinced of it.

While walking out of the training room, I caught sight of Optimus as the Peterbilt semi-truck I spent so many nights asleep in. His lights were on.

"You know I respect the Prime, Ace, but I got my own thoughts. He shouldn't have kept you in the dark. That was wrong on him. But you can't stay mad at him over a mistake he made to keep you safe."

I could hear the low rumble of his engine as I walked in front of him. I refused to sleep in his bed when I knew that would bring on another argument. I decided on spending the night in my barrack rather than putting myself in an uncomfortable situation. Ironhide's words, while they made sense, didn't matter much to me in my drained state.

Once I made it to my "room", I shut the door, locked it, and fell onto the bed. It was stiff and musty with the smell of sweat embedded deep within the mattress. It wasn't Optimus' bed. But at that time... I wasn't sure I wanted to be in his bed.

Not even three hours later, when I still wasn't asleep, did I figure out I very much wanted to be in Optimus' bed. Maybe I was upset with his decision but I wasn't upset with him anymore. Not when I was so tired I could blatantly see the difference between being angry with Optimus and being angry with his decision. I would have found out about Megatron either way. I just... I wanted him to come to me as often as I went to him. I sat up. That was exactly what I wanted to say to him. It was perfect! I flung myself out of the bed and more than happily left the barracks. I made a mental note to use my office if the same situation were to occur again.

To both my surprise and delight, I found Optimus outside with his lights still on. I sighed in relief. The passenger side door opened. I carefully grabbed onto the handle and swung myself in without much of a sound. His haloform wasn't there, and honestly, I didn't need it. I passed over the passenger seat. I sat down in the driver's seat, carefully touching the steering wheel, and felt Optimus rumble under me. I leaned forward and pressed my lips against it. My Prime shuddered.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled softly against the warm leather. "I'm not going to say that I'm not upset, but I am sorry. I shouldn't have yelled when you were trying to keep me safe. But... this isn't just you protecting me anymore. I'm going to protect you, too, and the Autobots. You are everything I have; everything I care about. You are my priority over all else."

He was quiet, but I knew he was listening.

"I want you to rely on me as I rely on you."

I leaned back in the seat only for the seatbelt to slither over me and buckle in. It tightened comfortingly and the seat warmed against my back. Like a gentle hug from behind, or when he would lay down with me in bed and pull me against his chest. I smiled. This was his silent apology.

"It's okay, Blue," I said. The seatbelt tightened just a bit more. "But no more secrets, okay? If you know something, then I want you to tell me. And I'll do the same. How's that, big guy?"

The engine rumbled. I grinned and snuggled into his seat.

"I love you too, Orion,"

[The artist in me said to stop here, but the fangirl wanted more, so what the hell?]

"Major Lennox, any updates on Decepticon movement?"

I walked up the last few stairs while looking over Ironhide's reports. There thankfully no signs around any of the previous attack sights. I lowered the halopad Ratchet had gifted me after I chewed into him about not informing me of the long-distance haloforms. Will dismissed the soldiers he was talking to and turned to look at me.

"Nothing so far, ma'am, but we're still looking. We have yet to receive reports from Egypt and Libya," he said. "They have six hours to respond before we send troops in."

"Let's put them on recon only," I ordered. "We don't need to be starting a war between the Autobots and Africa."

Will chuckled, a good sign compared to his darkening mood. I knew what had him this way. Sarah was nearing the end of her third trimester and the baby was likely to be a stillborn according to their OB-GYN doctor. I moved closer to Will and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Will, I've been thinking..." I started. I had run the idea by Optimus before and he seemed to think it was wise. I was just hoping Will would accept my offer. "You should go home. This is a dangerous time and your wife and daughter... they need you. And your baby - they're going to need you, too."

Will looked at me with this dark, terrified look on his face. But I knew that it was fear manifesting itself in other ways. I was very much familiar with such transgressions.

"Don't argue with me," I said before he could open his mouth. "I know I'm your number one priority, which is why after Sarah gives birth and you get to spend some time with your children, you can come back to base and go back to guarding me."

Will nodded slowly. "Okay..." he cleared his throat. "When, uh... when do I leave?"

I smiled. "You're out of here by tomorrow night at the latest."

I was expecting some clap on the shoulder or relieved sigh. Instead, I was completely enveloped by Will in this tight, inescapable hug. Will had never hugged me before. Sure, he had wrapped his arm around my shoulders or used me as an armrest, but never an actual hug. It was actually... nice. It was warm and happy. It reminded me of Optimus for a moment. I carefully wrapped my arms around Will and lightly patted his back.

"I swear, you're an angel," he muttered.

"And some would call me a nightmare," I returned. I chuckled as I pulled away from him. "Go pack, Will. I'll ask Epps if he'd mind taking over for you."

Will was off the catwalk in less than a nanosecond. I shook my head, laughing at his antics. I brought the halopad back up to look over any incoming messages or reports. It looked like my schedule was free for a little while, which meant I needed to find something to do. The paperwork was up to date, the soldier's routines were established, newcomers and transfers were adjusting well, and the Autobots seemed to be fairing well. Considering the low blow of Megatron's return, I was surprised by how well they were taking it. Bumblebee was still raising around the base with Mirage, Skids and Mudflap were still the bickering twins that destroyed most of what was in their path, and Ratchet was well on his way with this project. I let out a soft sigh. Maybe giving Ratchet a visit wouldn't be a terrible idea - the mech did mention he wanted me to see the progress he had made. I hurried my way off the catwalk and down the stairs, barely avoiding Skids and Mudflap as they went tumbling after one another.

"Hey!" I called after them. The twins looked over at me, Mudflap holding his fist over Skid's face. "Careful around the equipment, you two. We can only replace so many things at once."

In all honestly, we had the funds to replace the entire base - even expand (an idea I wanted to present to Ratchet before anything happened), but my fingers couldn't take many more papercuts from paperwork.

"Sorry, Doc," Skids murmured.

"Our bad, Ace," Mudflap said.

I smiled at the two. "No harm, no foul."

I scurried across the hanger in hopes to avoid any more tussles and made it to the Med-Bay in one piece. I opened the human-sized door to find not only Ratchet but also Optimus. Neither seemed to notice me at first. Then, Optimus paused suddenly and lifted his helm.

"Is something the matter, Optimus?" Ratchet asked, concerned.

"I sense Azrael," my Prime admitted. "She is near."

"I am right behind you," I said as I shut the door.

Both Autobots turned to face me as I approached. Almost as an instinct, Optimus knelt down and put down his servo. I stepped on and braced against one of his digits. He brought me up to optic level. I gazed idly at his cyan blue optics, so bright with life and wisdom. Optimus Prime, Leader of the Autobots, The Last Prime, and my Destined Conjunx Endura.

"Hey, Blue," I said dreamily.

Since I had dropped my anger against Optimus, there was this honeymoon phase between us. Like this perfect little bubble, no one could pop it. I was always dazed when I got to see Optimus in his true form. I adored his Cybertronian body much more than I did his haloform, although there were certain perks I can't say I'd want to trade.

"Good morning, Azrael," his baritone voice returned the same hazy sweetness I had.

"I am glad you stopped by, Director," Ratchet said, knocking both Optimus and me out of our bubble. But I knew that once night fell, we would be back to dreamily watching one another, talking about anything and everything. "I thought you should give an update to our investors, seeing as there are only a few left. Apparently, it was not a well-kept secret that Megatron has returned in the human world."

"I would expect nothing less of my own race," I murmured. But I nodded. "I'll be sure to update them. Any requests, or shall I send them your best regards?"

"Both, actually. The funds that had been supporting our projects recently withdrew, meaning that the progress I have made is all the progress I can make," Ratchet explained.

I nodded. I already knew I could fix that issue myself. Christ knew I had more than enough of my own funds to take care of such a task. I sat down in Optimus' servo and opened up the halopad again, beginning the email to the remaining investors. On a separate tab, I pulled up my personal bank transactions. Oh yes, I had more than enough to assist Ratchet.

"Consider your project refunded," I said casually. "Another moment or so and you'll find your projects swimming in cash, Ratchet."

Ratchet's optics off-lined for a solid minute before lighting back up. He pointed at me accusingly. "You're the anonymous investor!"

"Guilty," I grinned.

"I was unaware you had access to large sums of money. You always seemed -"

"Minimalistic?" I finished Optimus' sentence. I turned my head to look back at him, finding his optics just a bit brighter than before. "Force of habit, I suppose. I've never needed much so I just stuffed away all extra cash into bank accounts. Then they started growing and growing without me knowing until, suddenly, I got a call from the IRS stating they were opening an investigation into my accounts! Now I have too much money to do anything with. When I heard Ratchet needed funding, well, I knew I could stand to say goodbye to a few million."

"You have no plan for it?" he asked. Apparently, this was going to be our subject of conversation.

"Well, no, not really. When I realized I had so much, I started donating to charities and funded a few homeless shelters - even built houses in Africa to replace a destroyed village," I shrugged. "I did everything I could think of! And what would be better to use my money on than the very Cybertronians that keep saving the same planet over and over again?"

Optimus chuckled. "Once again, you surprise me. I have never met such a generous human."

"That reminds me - I'm sending Will home for a while," I said. "Sarah and Annabelle need him more than we do. Once the baby's born, he'll come back to base."

"An angel in human flesh," Ratchet muttered.

"Why does everyone call me an angel?"

Ratchet's progress was much more than I was expecting. What was once an incomplete pile of rusted and broken metal was no a full Cybertronian body laid out peacefully on the Med-Bay. Ratchet explained how their dear friend, Jazz, once Optimus' second in command, had been murdered by Megaron. I had to hold my breath to choke back the sobs. I could feel every ounce of pain Optimus did while recalling his deceased friend. Ratchet's hope was to find a way to revive Jazz, but he had yet to discover a suitable power source in order to do anything. I decided to bite back my idea on expansion for later that night when I had the chance to speak with Optimus in private. But... I could already sense that there wouldn't be much talking. As excited as the thought made me, I was still determined to improve conditions for Ratchet. It wasn't even just for him - this project meant everything to every Autobot. I was going to do it for all of them; my family. My family deserved that much.

Optimus was called away. He was needed for a video meeting with the President. Normally I would have joined him, but I needed to speak to Ratchet alone. I had spent long enough debating the thought and putting it off when it was what I wanted more than anything. But first things first - what the hell do Cybertronian's do for marriage? Ratchet's haloform fizzled to life at my request.

His haloform had always impressed me. He looked like whatever a sixty year old wished he looked like with shoulders about as broad as Ironhide's and posture straighter than a fucking pole. I wasn't embarrassed to say that he was good looking, but not near as good looking as my Prime. I mush preferred Optimus' dark blue locks over Ratchet's grey-peppered red hair. Of course, he wore a lab coat because, naturally, he had to be the buff genius.

"How may I be of assistance, Director?"

I grinned nervously at the Cybertronian Medic. "Well, I was wondering if you could enlighten me on something about Cybertronian relationships?"

"Of course," Ratchet said. "What exactly do you need clarification -"

"I want to marry Optimus,"

It spilled from my lips before I could even process the words. I covered my mouth with my hand, silently cursing myself out. Ratchet appeared tense and his face was twisted with shock. The weight of my words finally settled on the heavily charged air and Ratchet cleared his throat.

"Well, uh... I wasn't quite expecting this. Cybertronians do not usually partake in marriages as humans do. Usually, we would engage within spark bonding. However, as you are human, this act is impossible."

"Oh," I murmured. So it wouldn't be possible...

"That being said," Ratchet continued. "It most certainly is not impossible for a Cybertronian to partake in a traditional human marriage. I suppose you will have to ask him."